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Post by trickster ♥ on Jan 11, 2021 16:44:41 GMT -5
mention of injury, passing out, nausea, etc. so last night i was helping out at grandma's with mom. finished up stuff, and went outside to get in the car. it was super dark, but i didn't think anything of it. but. that was the problem, apparently.
i ran right into the luggage rack on the back of the car. forgot it existed, i guess. it's black so it blended in to the night completely. i don't really know how i ran into it with my upper thigh? as opposed to my lower leg, which makes more sense based on the height. all i know is i hit my thigh so bad i instantly had to collapse on the ground and start crying because of the pain. and i didn't even cry when i had an appliance put in to realign my jaw, so this was extreme.
i managed to get into the car. my mom was like how is it?? and i couldn't stop crying or speak in full sentences. my mom was worried i'd broken my bone which just made me sob for a second, and then pass out.
i was apparently out for like only 20-30 seconds, but my mom managed to get me awake and when i woke up i didn't even feel pain anymore, just numb. had no idea what just happened, thought i just woke up from a weird nap or something. mom was about to head me to the hospital but i felt okay. just nauseous.
right now, it's just sort of tender and stiff. but doesn't really hurt even when walking...? it's clearly not broken, cause i don't think i would have been able to walk. i thought there'd be a huge ass bruise by now, but nothing even though it's been like 18 hours??? i can't figure out what happened other than i landed on the bone and while that hurt like crap and shock caused me to pass out, it somehow didn't result in something worse.
anways, the luggage rack got taken off. my dad also had an incident with it last year, so it's clearly NOT worth potentially offing every person in my family. |
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Post by Sand on Jan 19, 2021 20:26:27 GMT -5
reviving because I need to vent.
About a week ago, I had an emergent (emergency?) surgery. I'm doing fine now, but I'm struggling to get back into school. I missed a week of my courses, so now I'm behind by 2 weeks in 2 of my classes & 1 week in another. I have some personal issues going on at the same time and I don't really know how to juggle all of this at once.
I'm just hoping to half ass one of my projects and if I am asked to fix things, I will, but I just want to submit something. I want to be back on the right track instead of running around.
how to not stress, I would like to know. I rarely stress out over schoolwork, but being behind always gets to me.
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Post by Amber on Jan 19, 2021 23:45:24 GMT -5
I love paying 90 dollars for an access code to get to some homework for a class I'll only be in for eight weeks. Thanks college and college textbooks publishers.
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Post by ☠ Harlequin Demon ☠ on Jan 20, 2021 12:59:50 GMT -5
There is a nest of ants in my books and plush toys and I spent the better part of an hour smacking a beanie baby rooster with a trowel to get ants off of it. My grandfather put my things outside without telling me and now my things are moldy and full of ants. I have had it.
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Post by mossecho on Jan 21, 2021 3:07:50 GMT -5
bio is just taking over my life. classes are three hours every tuesday and thursday. the homework is long and tedious but i'm not sure if i'm learning anything. all the hw just gets in the way of everything else. i have other things to do (essays, hw for all my other classes, cover letters, so much reading i can't even count), but bio just consumes all my time.
and it's hella depressing to learn about mass extinctions and the like... woop dee do.
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Post by Deleted on Jan 21, 2021 11:32:56 GMT -5
I'm getting sick. My throat hurts I'm feverish and I think I'm starting to feel a bit delirious like it feels like I'm disjointed from the rest of the world like living in a haze of befuddlement like nothing around me is real and my mind is floating.
I also feel extremely tired despite getting plenty of sleep.
I hate being sick.
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Post by Spinel on Jan 21, 2021 15:22:13 GMT -5
i feel like im starting to get sick and im just utterly terrified that its covid. or something : (
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Post by Saint Ambrosef on Jan 21, 2021 20:40:55 GMT -5
just cause y'all have trust issues in your romantic relationships and/or have suffered betrayal in the past doesn't mean you should project that onto other relationships. don't have patience for that.
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Post by Skypaw13 on Jan 23, 2021 21:59:32 GMT -5
Is it appropriate for a professor to type "NO!!" at a student's required discussion post? I'm trying to be more okay with being wrong, but it's really hard when I try to help by answering someone's question and the professor comes in and screams at me.
I'm already having issues with this professor because it's the same lady who made me feel like an idiot at my freshman orientation two years ago, and just the other day in office hours she got mad at me for not understanding her explanation. I just feel so stupid and inferior around her, and it makes me really scared to participate in class.
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Post by Sand on Jan 23, 2021 22:19:45 GMT -5
Is it appropriate for a professor to type "NO!!" at a student's required discussion post? I'm trying to be more okay with being wrong, but it's really hard when I try to help by answering someone's question and the professor comes in and screams at me. I'm already having issues with this professor because it's the same lady who made me feel like an idiot at my freshman orientation two years ago, and just the other day in office hours she got mad at me for not understanding her explanation. I just feel so stupid and inferior around her, and it makes me really scared to participate in class. Never had one typing no like that. I’ve had a professor be kind of mean about a classmate’s discussion post before. After that the professor was just snarky with the classmate. Did have one who be kind and respectful and explain why they responded with a no a while back. Did she give any explanation for why she wrote “no” that way? I don’t know if she has a short temper or what but just typing “no” the way she did makes very wary. |
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Post by Skypaw13 on Jan 23, 2021 22:38:18 GMT -5
Is it appropriate for a professor to type "NO!!" at a student's required discussion post? I'm trying to be more okay with being wrong, but it's really hard when I try to help by answering someone's question and the professor comes in and screams at me. I'm already having issues with this professor because it's the same lady who made me feel like an idiot at my freshman orientation two years ago, and just the other day in office hours she got mad at me for not understanding her explanation. I just feel so stupid and inferior around her, and it makes me really scared to participate in class. Never had one typing no like that. I’ve had a professor be kind of mean about a classmate’s discussion post before. After that the professor was just snarky with the classmate. Did have one who be kind and respectful and explain why they responded with a no a while back. Did she give any explanation for why she wrote “no” that way? I don’t know if she has a short temper or what but just typing “no” the way she did makes very wary. I don't quite know about an explanation for her saying no. But it was exactly what I typed above: capital NO with two exclamation points. She then offered the person I was responding to a different answer to their question. I don't understand her answer, but I don't want to ask because it references the exact same concept I didn't understand in office hours and she got snippy with me for. I have been getting all the questions right on homework, and that's the reason I went to answer my classmate's question despite having that episode with the professor over the concept. But apparently my thinking is wrong. And I genuinely can't think of a way to ask my professor what the hell her post even means without coming across as snippy or a showoff myself. EDIT: I talked to my mom about it. Still bugs me but I'm gonna let it go. |
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Ness
Goin' to Scotland
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Post by Ness on Jan 24, 2021 1:31:22 GMT -5
I am living a double life/super private and it is far more difficult than I imagined.
In September I spontaneously moved away from living with my parents and am living with my aunt who is in her late twenties. My aunt is super supportive(aside from my religion) and is the reason I have the job that I do. Because of a little encouragement from her I am now in the process of getting my GED and got a referral for counseling, two things that are super important to me and how I view myself.
Issue is that my aunt is the only member of my family who knows, as my mom was super weird about my education and made me feel like I was going insane because she claimed my mental issues/trauma was just me looking for attention. My dad has some mental issues and I don't want him to know as it would likely result in him being an ass to my brothers, a big no no.
There's been a few times the past couple weeks that I get super excited and just want to tell my family, only to stop and remind myself that it's is not a good idea.
I miss my family but living with them was a toxic environment, and I am finally progressing in my life! Something's that would've never happened under their roof. But it feels wrong and the impulsive, burn all the bridges, part of me is constantly five seconds away from telling them everything even if it would likely result in disaster.
...Guess I'm just a super lonely basket case.
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Post by ash on Jan 26, 2021 17:00:43 GMT -5
bro im sick of being mentally ill but i dont know what to do
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Post by ash on Feb 1, 2021 19:40:06 GMT -5
my mental health is so bad im barely a functional person anymore
i dont know anyone who would help so its like ok guess ill die
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Post by tallshadowstar on Feb 2, 2021 16:08:07 GMT -5
I'm 90% sure at this point that I have trichotillomania. I've always hated the feeling of my own hair due to sensory issues, but I've only started actively pulling at it within the last year. I was able to deny it for a while but reality has set in since I think it's really starting to damage my hair, no bald spots afaik but it's definitely flatter and thinner than it was before.
I'm kind of at a loss as to what I should do now. I'd just get it all chopped off so it can grow back healthier, but the pandemic prohibits that. As ridiculous as this sounds, I might buy a balaclava to wear around the house so I can't feel my hair without taking it off.
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Post by 🆉🅴🅻🅳🆁🅸🆂 on Feb 5, 2021 12:35:22 GMT -5
I’m sick of being sick
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Aroace
#b6efff
Name Colour
Dɾҽαɱƈʅσυԃ
Villain Enjoyer
Arcane Season 2 has got me in a chokehold once again (do not send help)
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Post by Dɾҽαɱƈʅσυԃ on Feb 5, 2021 14:58:44 GMT -5
I just got out of a huge screaming match with my father.
It was over something so mundane that I'm still in awe on how someone can become so enraged over it. He works at a radio station and up until two years ago greatly enjoyed working there. Due to constantly changing supervisors his mood coming home from work is getting worse each day (the pandemic isn't helping either).
About half an hour ago he came home as usual in another foul mood and my mother and I greeted him like we always do. I went back to my room and he stomped into the kitchen to put groceries he had bought into the fridge. He saw that the orange juice was almost empty and completely lost his mind over it yelling about how selfish it was and all those sorts of exaggerations. I went out and told him that I had drank some of it during lunch and he fumed about how lazy I was for not getting new orange juice immeadiately (even though there were still two bottles of it left in the fridge). My mother than came out of her room (she's currently in home office and was still working the late shift for the Customer Care Center of the Post Bank) and he started shouting at her too. We screeched at him like a duo of angry banshees and he accused us of ganging up on him like always and for never seeing his perspective. This is completely false as we are well aware of how he reacts when things don't go as he has planned and we were simply defending ourselves from his continous onslaught of verbal terror. He just came into my room to once again apologize (after storming out of our flat to buy more orange juice) and said that my mother and me needed to work on our response to his tantrums because he felt that we were overreacting to it.
If having a bad day justifies treating the people who love him like crap than it's a bad place to live in for me right now and I'll hopefully be able to move out soon.
I'm just so sick and tired of being blamed for the childish way in which he handles himself and all sorts of situations that could be dealt with way more maturely (he's almost sixty for StarClan's sake).
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Bisexual
King
trust yourself
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Post by King on Feb 5, 2021 18:33:19 GMT -5
It's just gotten worse and worse every time I come back here it seems. Since my last post, I feel bad, tired, depressed, unnoticed, lonely, and uncared about. My boyfriend seems more distant blowing me off, taking longer to reply. Kind of feels awful. He's also been a little toxic with some of the things he has told me, and he is an extreme drug user who is suicidal. I can't stop anything. I feel bad all the time, I don't think anyone really cares about me except my parents but that's cause they are my parents. No one can see my pain and suffering. That or no one cares. Which wouldn't shock me. I don't care much for school anymore it just stresses me out to an extreme. I feel so lonely. I don't know what I'm going to do, if things improve that'd be good. But if they don't my fate is my fate.
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Agender
#000000
Name Colour
Leapkit
Finder of Rare Friend Error
Derealizing for the forseeable future
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Post by Leapkit on Feb 5, 2021 22:23:36 GMT -5
Damn I really wish my "friends" would stop only using me as free therapy but ignoring me and refusing to invite me to events or """forget""" the rest of the time.
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Post by Fireleap on Feb 6, 2021 23:05:53 GMT -5
I used to have this really close friend but over the past year we've grown apart and it really hurts. She never starts our conversations, and every time we talk she never makes an effort to keep the conversation going. I've given her space because I thought I was just being too clingy but nothing works. The very few times we've seen each other in person she's always really nice, but then she just ignores me and I don't know what she wants. Does she even like me? It's understandable if she doesn't, but if that's how she's feeling why can't she just say it. Over the past three years I've lost all my friends and she was the only one left. I feel so pathetic for trying to cling on to this relationship. I'm so ****ing lonely. I haven't had a conversation with someone my own age in months. Talking to my mom's coworkers and my old teacher only does so much. I can't talk about anything real with them.
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Post by Deleted on Feb 12, 2021 9:56:18 GMT -5
My boyfriend broke up with me. He said he ran into his ex and they reconnected and he feels a much stronger connection with him than me.
I guess I can understand it since he's there and I'm not but it's still pretty crappy. I just feel angry and sad even though it was long distance I was really counting on this to work out. He's not just some stranger I met online by the way he's been my best friend since forever and we used to live in the same place but then I moved. A few nights ago I was thinking about him and how much I really did love him so I called him and told him and he said he felt the same and he couldn't believe it took so long for one of us to finally say it. Yes a few nights that's all it took for him to find someone better. Maybe it's better it happened this soon in the relationship I don't know. I would wish them the best but right now I'm too hurt and angry and I don't know if I can. It's just whatever I guess.
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Duskfire
"Winners focus on winning. Losers focus on winners." - Tom Brady, the GOAT
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Post by Duskfire on Feb 12, 2021 11:52:42 GMT -5
My boyfriend broke up with me. He said he ran into his ex and they reconnected and he feels a much stronger connection with him than me. I guess I can understand it since he's there and I'm not but it's still pretty crappy. I just feel angry and sad even though it was long distance I was really counting on this to work out. He's not just some stranger I met online by the way he's been my best friend since forever and we used to live in the same place but then I moved. A few nights ago I was thinking about him and how much I really did love him so I called him and told him and he said he felt the same and he couldn't believe it took so long for one of us to finally say it. Yes a few nights that's all it took for him to find someone better. Maybe it's better it happened this soon in the relationship I don't know. I would wish them the best but right now I'm too hurt and angry and I don't know if I can. It's just whatever I guess. I'm sorry for your loss. You're allowed to be sad. If he connected w/his ex so quickly after saying he loved you, he probably didn't love you, just being honest that is probably true.  |
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Post by Deleted on Feb 12, 2021 12:11:38 GMT -5
My boyfriend broke up with me. He said he ran into his ex and they reconnected and he feels a much stronger connection with him than me. I guess I can understand it since he's there and I'm not but it's still pretty crappy. I just feel angry and sad even though it was long distance I was really counting on this to work out. He's not just some stranger I met online by the way he's been my best friend since forever and we used to live in the same place but then I moved. A few nights ago I was thinking about him and how much I really did love him so I called him and told him and he said he felt the same and he couldn't believe it took so long for one of us to finally say it. Yes a few nights that's all it took for him to find someone better. Maybe it's better it happened this soon in the relationship I don't know. I would wish them the best but right now I'm too hurt and angry and I don't know if I can. It's just whatever I guess. I'm sorry for your loss. You're allowed to be sad. If he connected w/his ex so quickly after saying he loved you, he probably didn't love you, just being honest that is probably true. Thanks. You're probably right. Oh well stuff happens I guess. |
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Post by Saint Ambrosef on Feb 12, 2021 12:54:54 GMT -5
tmi female biology just started our NFP course together and while i've always known from past charting attempts that my cervical mucus is very low, i didn't realize just how obvious it should be until this course. like the female instructor was joking about how it should be like everywhere around ovulation time, meanwhile even with a digital self-examination i'm dry.
so basically i have a hormonal imbalance and fertility issues. yay....not like i didn't already feel broken.. |
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Post by Skypaw13 on Feb 14, 2021 2:53:54 GMT -5
Not really a vent, more just an amusing thing I saw that I didn't want to make a whole thread for.
I was reading over my mom's shoulder as she sent an email to my grandaunt. She wrote "Sky is due to graduate with a bachelor's degree at the end of next spring, but she seems lukewarm to any potential career options".
Which is the friendliest way possible to phrase "my daughter is pretty smart but completely directionless in life", lol.
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Post by mossecho on Feb 14, 2021 4:16:43 GMT -5
this is not really a vent, but just a random thank you to someone who will definitely not see this post:
to my linguistics TA, bless you for dealing with my eight-questions-long emails. you are a saint and the reason why I actually get decent grades on these problem sets. thank you <3
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Post by tallshadowstar on Feb 19, 2021 20:52:06 GMT -5
One of my roommates is driving me nuts. The first reason why is very petty, but every night at 8:30 while she makes dinner, she loops the same song over and over on her speaker. If it were different songs each time I wouldn't mind, but it's always the same. damn. slow jam. FOR AN HOUR. I put on headphones but I can still hear it in the distance. It's her house too so I won't tell her to stop, but I really wish she'd change it up.
Second reason: Yesterday she calls me downstairs, and she's cleaning the kitchen. No issue there, and I appreciate her doing it. But then she tells me to clean out my shared freezer and fridge of food - keep in mind she doesn't even use this one. I say okay because I don't want to be rude, and start to clean out some of my things that have gone bad. Then she throws out something from my freezer that doesn't belong to me, and starts pointing out things that I've 'missed' and can throw out - but they don't belong to me, hence why I didn't touch them. I tell her that, she doesn't reply, just keeps pointing out things. She's staring at me and I feel pressured, so I just give in and throw out the things she tells me to, then text the roommate who I share the fridge with to let him know. He's pissed, obviously, so he sends a text to the house chat vaguely saying that he hopes people aren't throwing out his food. Here's where I hit the boiling point - the roommate I'm annoyed with replies and says that I threw out his stuff! She didn't mention her role in the whole thing at all, just threw me under the bus to save her own skin. Yeah, I did throw stuff out, but only because you told me to and didn't care when I said it wasn't mine to get rid of! Don't solely blame me for something you told me to do!!!
This is all so inane but god, it's irritating and I needed to type it out instead of screaming it. I hope she moves out soon.
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Post by Spinel on Feb 21, 2021 19:27:35 GMT -5
tw talking about food & weight / weight loss & health anxiety
i love health anxiety WOOOOO !!!!
always worried about di*betes for some stupid reason aaaahhhh it doesn't run in my family but im worried my lifestyle will make me develop it even though im young, and at a healthy weight. my diet isnt the best tho and i need to exercise more. i spent most of my days hyperfixated on my computer its so bad !!!!!!!
speaking of weight, i need to gain some. im stressed and i have no appetite and now its actually starting to affect me because im dizzy and my hands are shaking lol : )
im just such a picky eater and im scared to try new things. textures and smells of new foods just get to me sooo badly. and my diet is so bland because of that, it's not varied at all, and im basically relying on like,,, nutrient shakes and vitamins at this point. i dont think this is sustainable for the future but im so stupid when it comes to trying new things, not even just when it comes to food.
therapy has been helping but ive been going to it for over a year and since the pandemic started things have just been ahhhhh. the anxiety medicine has been helping since the dose was upped but i really wish i could take adderall or some other kind of adhd stimulant. i know i had a bad reaction and it absolutely killed my appetite even more than it already is currently, but my brain fog lifted and i could ACTUALLY focus on doing tasks!! it was great !!! for like the first 2 days until i crashed for a week, but still jfdkghkdfl lol
im ranting about my entire life at this point lol. im such a failure : )
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Post by Skypaw13 on Feb 24, 2021 13:56:19 GMT -5
I have 10 more required classes to graduate with a bachelor's degree. Looking at registration for spring:
3 of the 10 have prereqs that I haven't completed.
2 of the 10 aren't being offered.
2 of the 10 are full even though registration opened less than 24 hours ago.
That leaves me 3 classes I could potentially register for, and all of them are only 1 section and are dangerously close to being full. In addition to that, signing up for those particular courses puts me in class from 8am to 5pm every day.
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