♦ Fire Emblem: Three Houses, EoaNA {OCs & Misc.}

Neason: Nothing like casual arson to brighten your day.

Estelle: Do you have a superpower?
Neason: Yep! It’s hindsight.
Estelle: …that’s not going to help us.
Neason: Yes, I see that now.
Juris, texting Agnar: Hello my love. I mean my rival.

Imrie, gardening: Hey, can you bring me the hoe?
Larissa: Yeah, sure.
*A few minutes later*
Larissa: Here you go.
Imrie:
Larissa:
Luca: Why am I here?

Jason: ‘People should be held responsible for their decisions’ yeah real easy for you to say, you make good decisions. What about me? I make bad decisions. What am I supposed to do about that?

Luca: *pointing to Vincent* Smart ass.
Luca: *pointing to Silke* Bad ass.
Luca: *pointing to Alastair* Nice ass.

Estelle: Look! A star is falling. Make a wish.
Luca: I wish Estelle will go on a date with me.
Callan: Oh dang, it flew back.

Luca, to Alastair: I mean, I get complimented all the time-
Julius: *starts cackling*
Luca: I do!
Julius: *laughs harder*
Jasmine, to Megumi: All right, let’s tell each other a secret about ourselves. I’m going to go first– I hate you.

Néo, to Orryn: Hey, gramps! I have a question.
Philomel: Mind your manners, Néo.
Néo: *rolls eyes* Yes, mom. *to Orryn* Please answer my question, gramps.

Julius: My throat hurts…
Grimm: Who asked you to scream so loud last night?
Julius: It’s your fault anyways, you dastard.
Grimm, taunting: It’s not my fault I’m so good.
Julius: YOU DEFINITELY CHEATED!
Julius: NO ONE BEATS ME AT MONOPOLY! NO ONE!

Estelle: Searc, when’s your birthday?
Searc: Why? So you can look up my natal chart? So you can figure out my weaknesses? So you can destroy me?
Estelle: …so I know when to wish you a happy birthday.

Tahvo: Okay, but all I've done today is sleep.
Tahvo: I woke up at noon, ate lasagna, and went back to sleep right after.
Quincy: Method actor Garfield cosplayer.
Tahvo: SHUT UP SHUT UP SHUT UP SHUT UP-

Julius: I literally cannot believe I let you talk me into this.
Neason: I literally said “I have an idea,” and you just went along with it without question.

Juris: You're too good for this world, Jason. But that's okay. I'll be an asshole for the both of us.

Adora: *jokingly flirting with Luca*
Alastair: *staring at them silently*
Nora: You're really quiet today.
Alastair, still staring: Nobody plans a murder out loud.

Juris: Do you like chicken?
Searc: No.
Juris: Do you like curry?
Searc: Sorry, no.
Juris: Oh, you won’t like what I did.
Searc: Did you make chicken curry for me?
Juris: No, I killed your father.

Imrie: How do I politely tell someone I want to hit their face with a brick several times?
Vincent: One wishes to acquaint your facial structure with a rigidly edged object fundamentally used in the construction of walls repeatedly.

Tahvo: Wtf is sephora?
Rekka: It sounds scary.
Silke: Isn’t that the guy with the long white hair from final fantasy?
Natalie: No you're thinking of sephiroth, a sephora is an angel belonging to the highest order of angels.
Estelle: No you’re thinking of a Seraph. A sephora is a second year college or high school student.
Nora: No, you’re thinking of sophomore. A sephora is when you use your phone to take a picture of yourself.
Rieka: No, you’re thinking of a selfie. A sephora is a calm breeze.
Vincent: No, you’re thinking of a zephyr. A sephora is one of those Greek vases with the two handles and the pictures.
Pierce: You’re thinking of an amphora. Sephora is the web browser you have to use on iOS devices.
Elara: You’re thinking of Safari. Sephora is an informal term for the seven-week period of counting the days between Pesach and Shavuot in the Jewish calendar.
Quincy: You’re thinking of Sefiras. Sephora is a bright blue gemstone best known for combining with Ruby to create Garnet and lead the Crystal Gems, training Pokemon, and/or assisting Steel to fight against time’s intrusions into our realm.
Imrie: No, you’re thinking of sapphire. Sephora is actually a part of a flower; it protects the flower in bud and supports the petals in bloom.
Julius: No, you’re thinking of sepal. Sephora is the wife of Moses, who lead the Israelites people out of Egypt.
Luca: No, you’re thinking of Tzipporah. Sephora was an ancient Greek poet who inspired a lot of lady-lovin’.
Néo: No, you’re thinking of Sappho. Sephora is the youngest of the five Marx brothers.
Juris: No, you’re thinking of Zeppo. Sephora is the Heimdall’s sister.
Agnar: No no no guys, you’re thinking of Sif. Sephora is a venereal disease that turns your brain to swiss cheese, going so far as to destroy external features like the nose. Famous gangster Al Capone suffered from sephora.
Fion: No, you’re thinking of syphilis. Sephora is that radiant feeling you get when you have found perfect peace and happiness.
Adora: No, you’re thinking of euphoria. Sephora’s a ****ing makeup store you dipshits.

Larissa: hey thanks for talking with me about this, I know it's a lot to put on you, but I really appreciate this.
Searc: Oh naw fam, it's all good, i'm always here to talk!
Larissa: You are just always so good at listening and knowing the answers to things. Like do you ever go to therapy?
Searc: What? No! Why would I ever do that?
Larissa: Wait...wait...What do you mean you don't go to therapy..?
Searc: i just don't?
Larissa: Mentally you are the healthiest out of all of us!? How do you do it??
Searc: HEALTHIEST!? No absolutely not! Oh my god!
Larissa: What do you mean you aren't the healthiest?
Searc: Oh! Well instead of talking about my emotions I just bottle them all up inside so I don't actually have to think about them. And then I help other people to make them feel better about their emotions and so that I feel useful to them!
Larissa, concerned: ....
Larissa: Are you okay?
Searc: No! But thanks for asking though!
Larissa: You need a therapist!!!
Searc: Probably, but so do you.

Larissa: Ughh I'm feel like im.just being dramatic. I'm so sorry to put this all on you.
Searc: oh no you're good! Don't apologize your feelings are valid! Don't worry!
Larissa: Thank you, i appreciate that. How are you doing though, I feel like I haven't checked up on you in a while.
Searc: oh...I'm fine, you know. Life's been going.
Larissa: what's going on recently?
Searc: oh well my partner broke up with me.
Larissa: oh no really....?
Searc: yea....and then they died...
Larissa: and then they died?! What?!
Searc: yea...and then my parents kicked me out of their house.
Larissa: omg are you okay!?
Searc: and then my cat ran away. Cause I was kicked out of the house, so he just kinda went
Larissa: your emotional support cat?
Searc: yea Chester, yea he's gone now, I saw him get eaten by a dog
Larissa, visibly concerned: what?!
Searc: yea....then I got hit by a truck
Larissa, more concerned: is that it!?!?
Searc:...I think so yea!
Larissa, concerned: you nee....are you okay!?!?
Searc: I mean not really, but we are talking about you here. This isn't about me.
Larissa: IT SHOULD BE!
Searc: listen I'm the therapist friend, I take care of you
Larissa: YOU NEED HELP!
Searc:Yea probably

from youtube shorts of a creator i like, but they seemed perfect for the two emotionally challenged students

its the nice way the professors put in their notes, they know its way worse then that, but putting emotionally challenged helps them, probably philomel, have more hope they might just might be able to emotion properly. and yes simpastair will forever be horny for luca, its a great ooc ship, until he falls for someone in actual canon, then he simps for them

omg, searc as Wednesday, he would actually probably have similar vibes as her, hating being shipped off to another school, having a murder attempt charge hanging over his head, he would be less interested in solving a mystery and instead probably get into fights with the other students

that neason quote makes me think of a short i saw, where this person air fryed gushers, simply because their roommate was gone and as they put it 'no one is around to tell me to not air fry things"

mood konstantin

Julius: I know you love him.
Searc: I'm not in love with Quincy!
Julius: I didn't say who.
Searc: Damn it!

Searc: Do you ever think before you do something?
Neason: Nope, I like being just as surprised as everyone else.
Neason: The enemies can't know my next move if I don't know it myself.

Searc: If I'm extra sarcastic with you it probably means I'm flirting with you or you really annoy me and I can't handle your crap... have fun figuring out which one

Neason: Capsaicin makes your mouth feel like it’s burning because it increases your nerve sensitivity to heat. and menthol does the same thing but cold.
Neason: so if i eat a habañero pepper and then eat a bunch of breath mints, they’ll cancel each other out and i’ll be fine.
*later*
Neason: hey guys, so guess what hellfire tastes like.

Searc: I want to kiss you.
Quincy: I'm sorry, could you repeat that?
Searc: I said if you die, I won't miss you.

Searc: Are you trying to give me a ****ing aneurysm?
Neason: Pretty sure we all are.
Rekka: I wasn't.
Julius: I was.
Quincy: I was trying to stop them, for your consideration.
Callan: I just cause aneurysms naturally.

Luca: It’s an innocent question.
Pierce: No question is ever innocent coming from you.

Agnar: If we don’t get out of this alive… If we’re both about to die… I love you, Juris!
*Neither of them die*
Juris: …
Agnar: …
Juris: So do you wanna talk about somethi-
Agnar: No thank you.

Luca: Feel free to dress slutty at my funeral. It’s what I would have wanted.

Alastair: Ideologically I don't agree with organized religion but they kind of went off with stained glass.

Searc: I think I could survive truly horrific circumstances if i had a crush on someone there, like if Quincy was there.

Neason, to Amatus: You gaslight me ima light you on fire

Neason: When people give me directions and say "you can't miss it" buddy you have no clue what I'm capable of. Three hours ago Silke told me to take a long walk off the pier at the fishing pond and I'm currently on the roof of the classroom and don't know how to get down.

*at Desai's funeral*
Rekka: We should do a jumping photo, it would be fun,

*told he's needed to fulfill an ancient prophecy*
Jason: What's the latest possible deadline?

Luca: ain't been horny in 5 minutes,i think i'm healing

Searc: Everyone you meet is fighting a battle you know nothing about.
Silke: Attack while they are distracted.

Juris: I like going for runs at night. The added fear of being murdered does wonders for my cardio.

*flirting*
Ambrose: she wants me so bad im kicking my feet in the air and giggling rn
*after being stabbed*
Ambrose: okay so there might have been a misunderstanding

Luca: Dating is easy. Ask someone out, they say no. Simple really.

Searc: Be the horrifying backstory to your family's lineage

*after his 3rd near death experience*
Searc: Woke up again. Not thrilled but i'll see how it plays out.

Julius: Not all your life decisions have to be smart. Some can be purely for cinematic value

Ciarra: i do the opposite of gatekeeping. You will be forced to like my interests. you will listen.

Imrie, about Luca: You ever met a man, who clearly life has never told to shut the **** up?

Imrie: Men be like "im fighting demons" and the whole time its just accountability

Juris: Why are girls *pointing to Adore and Nora* allowed to say girlfriend to refer to a platonic friend but *wrapping his arm around Agnar* i cant say this is my boytoy twink malewife Agnar?

ambrose really shouldnt flirt, man will unintentionally offend someone, and yea he at least knows to stop unlike luca
and let a wolfboy dream, sure agnar can kick his ass, but that just adds to the charm of it all

and if i recall right from what someone told me cause i had no clue when i asked what it meant, it is just an attractive gay man, so we would just have to figure out of the queer boys who would be considered attractive and there we go a twink boy

Neason: We're lost.
Searc: Lost as in "where the hell are we?"
Julius: We're not totally lost! We're still in Leicester!
Searc: You said this was a shortcut.
Neason: It is a shortcut! Look how fast we got lost!

Imrie: You know, sometimes I can’t stand your dorky face.
Imrie: *punches him in the face*

Imrie: Adding ‘lmao’ does not hide your pain
Larissa: Yes it does lmao
Alastair: Luca, would you like to have some food that was made in Albinea?
Luca: Sure. What is it?
Alastair: Me.

Néo: Miss me with that "weapon accuracy" shit. I'm attacking everything.
Néo: I'm laying down cover. I'm hitting the walls. I'm hitting my teammates.
Néo: I'm hitting myself!
Néo: My accuracy is 100 percent, y'all just don't know what I'm aiming at.

Searc: Mom? Am I adopted?
Luna: No why the **** would I pick you?

Keres: God I love poisoning people.

Quincy: It’s my birthday, the most fun day of the year, something you wouldn’t understand because you’re not programmed to feel joy.
Searc: Yes, but my software is due for an exuberance upgrade.
Quincy: You know, when you play along with the robot jokes, it kinda ruins my enjoyment of them.
Searc: Yes, I know.

Rekka: People think I’m smart, but I’m not smart.
Searc: Who thinks you’re smart?

Quincy: I don’t think your father approves of me.
Searc: Don’t worry about it. He doesn’t approve of me, either.

Imrie, texting: You are the bae of my existence
Luca, replying: Awww! I love you too Imrie!
Imrie, texting: *bane

Nora: Have you ever read something so explicit that you feel like you need to go to church and stay there for a year?
Adora: Send it to me.

Néo, on the phone: Hey Jasmine, remember when you told me Santa wasn’t real?
Néo: Well joke's on you, because I’m at the mall right now and guess who’s ****ing here.

Tahvo: Yesterday, we hid all the chalk from the classroom and told Philomel that the archbishop, for some reason, had came down and taken all the chalk to her office for something. He left to get some more, and came back to us revealing the prank. He was genuinely delighted since he hadn't been successfully April fooled in a long time.
Jasmine: Meanwhile at the training grounds, Ambrose was kicked in the balls by Néo screaming "APRIL FOOLS!"

Silke: It's okay that you also like guys, Alastair.
Grimm: As long as it's not Luca!
Vincent: Love whoever you want to love unconditionally.
Adora: Except for if it's Luca.
Megumi: Whatever floats your boat.
Natalie: But if it's Luca I will sink it.

Luca: You’re probably one of those beautiful women who doesn’t even know it.
Adora: No, I know it.

Neason: I'm the most responsible person in our class.
Searc: You literally just set the whole kitchen on fire.
Neason: And I take full responsibility of that.

Julius: Looks like we'll be part of Ambrose's group this time and I hate it. It's gonna be so boring.
Neason: I have a suggestion!
Julius: Mr Arson bestie, I’m excited to hear it!

Larissa: *running into the room and shutting the door* Hey guys
Larissa: I’ve got a fun exercise. I would like everyone to take a moment and think back to a time when they did something stupid, how they were treated, and how they wished they were treated.
Imrie: What did you do, Lara?

Elara: *In the Black Eagles classroom* Wait, I think I saw Luca!
Alastair: I promise you, you did not see Luca. He hid very well.
Alastair: I mean umm...weird.

Néo: *suffering the clear and obvious ramifications of his voluntary actions* once again the goddess torments me for no purpose but sick amusement

Luca: Next time show a little leg.
Silke: The only time you’re gonna see “a little leg” from me is when I’m about to kick your ass.

Grimm, to Rekka and Julius: I’m sorry you guys had to witness such a vicious fight.
Rekka: Oh? Was that a fight?
Grimm: Are you kidding? Pierce said “You’ll have to excuse me” instead of “Please, excuse me”. May as well spit in my face.

Neason: I found ingredients for cooking. Chestnuts, spices, bananas, garlic, frogs, and rats.
Vincent: Alright, just put them all in the pot.
Estelle: Wait! Some of those aren't exactly food!
Vincent: Oh, you don't like garlic? We can use something else then-
Estelle: That's not what I meant!

Imrie: One day, someone will think about you for the last time in eternity. You will be forgotten by the world and the universe.
Julius: Not if I eat the Mona Lisa.

Neason: Are you ready, Searc?
Searc: I’m gonna have to say no.
Neason: Great, let’s do this!

Estelle: Date someone who will drag you outside at 3am to look at the stars.
Searc: If anyone, and I mean anyone, wakes me up at 3am to go look at the damn sky, they will be removed indefinitely from my life.
Imrie: It’s always “this doll is haunted and is ominously shattering the china” and never “how can I provide adequate enrichment for my haunted doll so she doesn’t destroy stuff out of boredom”

Luca: Face it, our chemistry is undeniable.
Imrie: You know what else is undeniable?
Luca: What?
Imrie: The pain this fork is going to cause when I jam it into your eye!


Neason: Oh, Fion, I have no idea what you just said, but it sounded so smart!

Néo: You got tossed out too, huh?
Megumi: Yeah, for yelling.
Néo: You yelled in a museum? That is hardcore!
Megumi: Why’d you get tossed out?
Néo: Stole a pterodactyl. But it’s not like I yelled.

Alastair: How much of your personality is performative and how much is it you being you?
Larissa: Dude, every me is me, we are the mask and the wearer.
Searc: Speak for yourself! If you peel away enough of my overcoats there’s nothing inside but a single dead rat and that’s a fact.

Tahvo: You know what sucks about the way you say "I'm fine"? The fact that you never really are.

i love all these so much

im totally stealing that search one of him trying to tell quincy how much he appreciates him and saying what the **** you want, but that callan soup one is such a mood my adhd brain often comes up with two different ways to say it and sadly I do have times where I go "lets combine both!"

I will XD, even if it will be one-sided, I'm going to have Searc fall for Quincy, and this man will fall hard, and not know what to do, so he will send so many mixed signals
Callan: So do you want to kill Quincy...or kiss him?
Searc, staring at Quincy across the room: ...both?

yea XD it's worse when it happens when I'm working cause the customer just looks at me weird

Neason, to Searc: Turn that frown upside-down!
*a little while later*
Neason: What are you doing?
Searc, trying to do a handstand: You told me to “turn that frown upside-down” but it’s not working .

Searc: Sometimes, I feel something crawl over me at night…
Julius: It’s the consequences of your actions.
Ciarra: The guilt that comes with your choices, perhaps.
Rekka: Past trauma?
Quincy: Oops! That’s me! Sometimes I sneak into your room to cuddle.

Konstantin: What’s your greatest weakness?
Larissa: Interpreting the semantics of a question, but ignoring the pragmatics.
Konstantin: Could you give an example?
Larissa: Yes, I could.

Luca: Why is this happening to me?
Luca: Goddess, are you punishing me because my hair is better than yours?
Pierce: Uh, Julius? Why is Rekka in the tor**** bay?
Julius, fiddling with the control panel: Because the stupid launch button isn't working!
Searc: I’m so tired.
Natalie: Did you get to bed late?
Searc: No.
Natalie: Did you do something strenuous?
Searc: No.
Natalie: Then why are you tired?
Searc: I’m alive.