Agender
#000000
Name Colour
Leapkit
Finder of Rare Friend Error
Derealizing for the forseeable future
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Post by Leapkit on Aug 6, 2023 18:06:00 GMT -5
I hate all the sneaky ass voter things, especially since those are seperate issues that should require seperate bills imo, since you could support one thing but not support another in the same bill. Too many of these things have been passed just to dupe people into voting for what the government wants because they get to win either way it turns out while everybody else takes a loss.
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Post by rabbit on Aug 6, 2023 18:20:53 GMT -5
I hate all the sneaky ass voter things, especially since those are seperate issues that should require seperate bills imo, since you could support one thing but not support another in the same bill. Too many of these things have been passed just to dupe people into voting for what the government wants because they get to win either way it turns out while everybody else takes a loss. Issue 1, the one about changing the rules for passing any constitutional amendment ever, being voted for in August and reproductive rights amendment and weed amendment that will be voted on in November are all separate amendments that will each be voted on. But, yeah, your last statement is spot on. |
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Post by Saint Ambrosef on Aug 6, 2023 18:24:09 GMT -5
my favorite gov move is to title a proposed bill something generically good like "save babies from dumpsters" or "let gay people have jobs", but then if you read the bill it has nothing to do with what the title suggests and instead is like... proposing to increase property taxes 2000% or funding lockheed martin investments.
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Agender
#000000
Name Colour
Leapkit
Finder of Rare Friend Error
Derealizing for the forseeable future
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Post by Leapkit on Aug 6, 2023 18:45:20 GMT -5
Also tangentially related, I wish there were more resources where effort was put in to put proposed bills into layman's terms. There's so many times people are confused on what they are voting on because the language when you get there is intentionally vague or sometimes talks itself in circles. Or you need to know extra political/legal lingo which most people just don't, even if you are educated on the issues themselves it's getting to a point where you need to go to law school to understand half the shit. And that's not even totally a hyperbole.
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Post by rabbit on Aug 6, 2023 18:52:06 GMT -5
Also tangentially related, I wish there were more resources where effort was put in to put proposed bills into layman's terms. There's so many times people are confused on what they are voting on because the language when you get there is intentionally vague or sometimes talks itself in circles. Or you need to know extra political/legal lingo which most people just don't, even if you are educated on the issues themselves it's getting to a point where you need to go to law school to understand half the shit. And that's not even totally a hyperbole. I can tell you in many cases, many people straight up don’t read whatever they are voting on, and vote whatever their news program, church, or mailed political ads tell them. |
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Post by ! (Ġray) ! on Aug 8, 2023 0:33:33 GMT -5
Small thing but I left my bag outside my school library this morning and when I came back someone had ripped off my evil eye charm? Like nothing else was stolen just that. And it didn’t fall off because A) the string was cut and  it wasn’t on the floor or anywhere nearby. It just seems like such a weird thing to take especially since I had my phone and debit card in the bag. Idk I’m just mad that someone would take it |
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Agender
#000000
Name Colour
Leapkit
Finder of Rare Friend Error
Derealizing for the forseeable future
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Post by Leapkit on Aug 9, 2023 20:33:46 GMT -5
im tired of feeling sick and being alone with my thoughts they're driving me mad and im not one of those people who can internal dialogue with myself i really need another person i can word vomit at to process.
im not asking for someone to be my therapist cause i'm pretty good at figuring out my own problems as soon as i do start talking about them but i do need to offload my brain...
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Post by Saint Ambrosef on Aug 9, 2023 21:02:44 GMT -5
im tired of feeling sick and being alone with my thoughts they're driving me mad and im not one of those people who can internal dialogue with myself i really need another person i can word vomit at to process. im not asking for someone to be my therapist cause i'm pretty good at figuring out my own problems as soon as i do start talking about them but i do need to offload my brain... im here |
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Post by Sand on Aug 10, 2023 3:40:11 GMT -5
I’m also here for you.
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Agender
#000000
Name Colour
Leapkit
Finder of Rare Friend Error
Derealizing for the forseeable future
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Post by Leapkit on Aug 10, 2023 6:08:26 GMT -5
I appreciate it, I am probably gonna type it out later though because im just too tired to think about it anymore on top of additonal bs that happened all I wanna do is play pokemon and sleep for 30000 years.
If you still feel like hearing about my nonsense i'll just PM it because some of it is personal and embarassingly stupid.
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Post by Quill on Aug 10, 2023 12:17:54 GMT -5
The city I just moved from is hosting a week-long international pyrotechnics conference, in which consumers and vendors can set off fireworks all week until 1 AM, and they have public shows three days out of the week . . . right near the animal shelter. Great.
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Agender
#000000
Name Colour
Leapkit
Finder of Rare Friend Error
Derealizing for the forseeable future
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Post by Leapkit on Aug 11, 2023 4:14:21 GMT -5
I didnt forget but im so overwhelmed my brain is fried like that pile of lizards out of the bottom of that one tiktok lady's rice cooker.
i have zero coherent thoughts.
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Post by whiteflight on Aug 12, 2023 11:14:20 GMT -5
I need to vent this out I can't hold it in anymore and sorry for any mispellings I'm crying too hard right now and if anyone wants to skip this please do. I still don't know how to do spoilers on my phone. I'm sure other people have seen my rant about my cousins not wanting to hangout with me anymore. Today my parents just had to tell me that the reason why my cousins don't want to hangout with me anymore is because I stopped going to college. That isn't the real reason but my parents are strict parents who want me and my siblings to go to college, get a gpod degree and a good job. I first got into college during covid and I dislike online classes plus my medical condition was getting worse due to stress. So during the summer I decided to stop going to college my parents got mad at me and kept yelling at me since I also can't get a job. In my state I have to have 3 months of no seizures in order to drive. I hate how they had to bring in a topic they know I'm sensitive about to try to make me go back to college and if I cry in front of them they'll just yell at me. I still remember their words when I tried to kill myself. "You'll just be wasting mom amd dad's money if you kill yourself. You want us to be poor." They're not abusivd they're good parents and I love them it's just that I wish that they would actively show that they love me. They're pay my for my medication and college. I wanna thank everyone who read this. I don't have my older brother with me so this is the only place I can vent to. I'm just a selfish brat who can't take in negative words. |
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Post by Saint Ambrosef on Aug 12, 2023 15:26:50 GMT -5
whiteflight You are not selfish at all, please don't be so hard on yourself. Your parents might mean well and probably have good intentions, but emotional neglect is a real thing and you shouldn't feel bad for recognizing that.
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Agender
#000000
Name Colour
Leapkit
Finder of Rare Friend Error
Derealizing for the forseeable future
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Post by Leapkit on Aug 15, 2023 13:42:58 GMT -5
went to optometrist yesterday. updated glasses. said he couldn't see anything wrong with my eyeballs physically that he could see while siting there though that would be making them hurt or get unfocused or see double.
went to neuro. went over symptoms. was asked a bunch of further questions. have to make an appointment for another mri because i might have MS or something.
i wanna die.
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Non-binary
☾ѕησσzє☽
no im not okay, I suck at a game I play 8 hours a day
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Post by ☾ѕησσzє☽ on Aug 15, 2023 14:38:36 GMT -5
I feel weird venting here, after not being here for so long, but I found a community here so it feels safe.
the past like...few weeks have been so stressful :<. I quit my job back in April to pursue my dream of being a WebDev, I'm enrolled in some certificate courses for it but a lot of the time I feel like a major fraud. My SO is super supportive of me pursuing this but I just feel like a burden. My family is also being somewhat supportive, my grandma is helping pay for things but again I feel like she's wasting her money on me for this.
I've also been dealing with my mother popping back in randomly in my life. I guess she owes the government a lot of money and is hoping that since my dad never pursued her for removing her name off his house she can get it. She has literally messaged my brother hateful messages to send to me, for some reason, about this. She tells me how I'm just some little girl who doesn't understand her place and needs to just give her the house. As if I have control over that, my dad is handling it best he can I suppose. He's pursuing back child support now, upwards of 20,000 dollars, to get her off my back. Her last message to my dad telling him she is blocking him and his kids. It feels like a whole new wound being torn open.
Add on, I am still currently in a separation phase with my ex husband. I am only 23, I can finally file the divorce after almost two years separated, I have the paperwork to turn in, but I'm on the fence solely because he won't let me back in our former shared home to get my items. Our home was 'rented to own' by his mom. My name is nowhere on the home but my DL is addressed to it. He refuses to let me grab the books my grandma read to me as a child, my grandpa's seat cover for his truck(the only item I have left from the truck that was meant to be mine), and my grandma's dresser that she hand painted. His reasoning being that I have his car. He has four cars sitting in his yard. One runs, the others he kept saying are project cars. He sold my first car to fix up the car I currently have. I've been taking care of it since then, replacing the battery in it, oil changes, all of it. If I gave it back, he would let it sit and rot while I had nothing to drive, which would be rough on me considering my own family is about a hour and a half drive away. The day we split ways, we put the car fully in my name only. I've been paying the insurance on it along with all the other fees. He told me I'm not allowed to bring anyone with me when he allows me to grab these items, no one else can step foot inside. He wont help me move it either. Again. One item is a full sized dresser. I feel so much guilt for letting this fester so long, I wish I had grabbed these items sooner but I was in such a state when we split ways, I was basically starting over. I left with what I could then fled the state.
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Post by Dark on Aug 15, 2023 17:15:53 GMT -5
Honestly, I'm just tired of myself. I get bored too easily, am overly sensitive, can't seem to get over things. I wish I were taller, wish I had a deeper voice, wish I didn't let my feelings steer me so easily. People can say we're perfect the way we are but being me isn't even close to perfect. I don't know anything anymore.
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Agender
#000000
Name Colour
Leapkit
Finder of Rare Friend Error
Derealizing for the forseeable future
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Post by Leapkit on Aug 15, 2023 21:26:40 GMT -5
[once again liking posts so you can consider them virtual hugs]
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Omnisexual
🅃🄴🄼🄿🄾
Being a theater kid
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Post by 🅃🄴🄼🄿🄾 on Aug 15, 2023 22:34:50 GMT -5
TW! Mentions of SH and thoughts of offing oneself. So, today was pretty good until a few minutes ago. I was hanging out downstairs with my mom and saw one of my old art projects. It was one on a picture frame where you'd draw a picture and put it in the frame and then use a tool to carve/trace over the picture on the glass. Well, it just so happened to be broken. I saw it and the first thing my mind told me was to take a shard of glass and cut my wrist... so I did. As soon as I did it I thought, "what have I just done?" I quickly threw away the picture and went back to my room and had a small panic attack. It reminded me of when I was at one of my all time lows a couple years ago and used to cut my wrists and was thinking about offing myself. The only thing that really stopped me last time was my mom telling me not to hurt myself. Still looking at the cut now, even if it didn't bleed, makes me feel guilt and anxiety. I'm scared that I'm gonna fall back into my old habits since this past year has been a bit rough.
I really want to tell my friends, but I'm scared they'll judge me and tell other people. I don't want to tell my therapist either, in case she tells my parents about it. I'm stuck. I want to tell somebody, but I feel like there's nobody I can trust. |
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𝑏𝑙𝑒𝑢
call me blue <3
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Post by 𝑏𝑙𝑒𝑢 on Aug 16, 2023 10:14:31 GMT -5
Trigger warning: grief and death I've struggled with this the past few days, and I don't have many people I can talk to about it. I've seen this thread pop up a few times and thought maybe I'd try to vent here.
My great aunt died last Friday, and it hurt me and my family pretty badly. I will spare the details, but she suffered, she suffocated. And I think what hurts the most is that no one knew and no one was there to help her when it happened. My grandma hadn't heard from her Saturday morning but she assumed my aunt was just in one of her moods, but when Sunday came and still nothing we all suspected that something was definitely wrong. She would always call. And then they found her Sunday night.
It feels so unreal that she's really gone. And to go out the way she did makes us all feel a bit guilty. She was trying to call for help in her final moments. Idk its like... if only we did more to help her health. But there's only so much you can do when it comes to your elderly family. They don't want to feel helpless and you can't force them to do anything. But if we had tried a little harder maybe things wouldn't have turned out the way they did. Every time I think of what happened I break down again. No one deserves to go out that way.
I wish she was still here. She knew how to get on everyone's nerves but we all knew she meant well. It was always out of love. I miss her terribly. I wish I could have spoken to her one more time. Maybe we'll meet again someday i hope. |
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Aroace
#b6efff
Name Colour
Dɾҽαɱƈʅσυԃ
Villain Enjoyer
Arcane Season 2 has got me in a chokehold once again (do not send help)
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Post by Dɾҽαɱƈʅσυԃ on Aug 16, 2023 12:01:43 GMT -5
Headaches are a ***** to deal with.
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Post by Brownie on Aug 16, 2023 13:14:36 GMT -5
cw health and heathcare systems I'm just tired. So done. My last 6+ months have been a wash, going to the doctor, them telling me to monitor this or try this med or schedule this test and each check in is like, at least a month apart or more and so I'm just sitting around in between unable to do anything treading on eggshells because if I move too little or move too much or eat the wrong thing or laugh too hard then it triggers the pain and leaves me practically bedridden for the next three days trying to recover.
and I'm just so sick of it. Six months of constant appointments, over two years of trying to figure out what is wrong with me that, sometimes, I can't walk up a flight of stairs without nearly passing out, or that I'm shaking from walking from my bed to the bathroom-- but that other days I'm perfectly fine and can walk miles or even start a light workout... except when I push that hair too much and then I'm feeling worse than ever. I don't know what to do anymore.
I'm too afraid to make commitments because what if I wake up that morning and am physically unable to follow through? I can't get a job because some days I am so lightheaded I can't walk straight, let alone drive. I love bowling and rock climbing and playing street hockey and basketball with friends, but I've been feeling so bad the last two months and had to cancel so often that I've stopped getting invitations. And I don't blame them, because I can't give them a straight answer as to why. Two years and no answers. Over a year now of just. Waiting. Scared to move in case it triggers the pain. Knowing that it's getting worse but that there's nothing I can do but wait for that next appointment. I'm so tired. |
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Agender
#000000
Name Colour
Leapkit
Finder of Rare Friend Error
Derealizing for the forseeable future
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Post by Leapkit on Aug 16, 2023 13:26:48 GMT -5
Brownie Not to alarm you but that sounds eerily similar so some of my own issues going on the past few years which is why they suggested it might be MS and now I need the mri. That might be a new place to start looking to be tested, if you haven't been already? It's kinda bad either way but I hope you get an answer soon.
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Post by Brownie on Aug 16, 2023 14:40:29 GMT -5
Brownie Not to alarm you but that sounds eerily similar so some of my own issues going on the past few years which is why they suggested it might be MS and now I need the mri. That might be a new place to start looking to be tested, if you haven't been already? It's kinda bad either way but I hope you get an answer soon. Maybe. I'm being a little intentionally vague because i dont want to put my health issues out there. But i can look into that. |
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Post by valleylight on Aug 16, 2023 17:23:19 GMT -5
cw health and heathcare systems I'm just tired. So done. My last 6+ months have been a wash, going to the doctor, them telling me to monitor this or try this med or schedule this test and each check in is like, at least a month apart or more and so I'm just sitting around in between unable to do anything treading on eggshells because if I move too little or move too much or eat the wrong thing or laugh too hard then it triggers the pain and leaves me practically bedridden for the next three days trying to recover.
and I'm just so sick of it. Six months of constant appointments, over two years of trying to figure out what is wrong with me that, sometimes, I can't walk up a flight of stairs without nearly passing out, or that I'm shaking from walking from my bed to the bathroom-- but that other days I'm perfectly fine and can walk miles or even start a light workout... except when I push that hair too much and then I'm feeling worse than ever. I don't know what to do anymore.
I'm too afraid to make commitments because what if I wake up that morning and am physically unable to follow through? I can't get a job because some days I am so lightheaded I can't walk straight, let alone drive. I love bowling and rock climbing and playing street hockey and basketball with friends, but I've been feeling so bad the last two months and had to cancel so often that I've stopped getting invitations. And I don't blame them, because I can't give them a straight answer as to why. Two years and no answers. Over a year now of just. Waiting. Scared to move in case it triggers the pain. Knowing that it's getting worse but that there's nothing I can do but wait for that next appointment. I'm so tired. cw: health, misdiagnosis POTS and multiple centralized sensitization syndromes have been a lot like this for me, especially the six months before I was diagnosed. Similar symptoms, and then the never-ending doctor visits and nonstop waiting. Feeling like everything you do makes things worse. Having no idea what’s happening, not being able to work. Then misdiagnoses, drug reactions, endless referrals…
Being welcomed by the community here has helped me so much, even now waiting for an underlying diagnosis. I’m so sorry you’re having to go through this— I hope things get better for you, and you’re able to get answers soon.
I don’t know if this helps, but I found chronic pain resources (from places like Mayo Clinic) really helpful, especially after I learned I’d been repeatedly misdiagnosed and still had no idea what was wrong with me. It just gave me a lot of small, practical ways to manage pain/fatigue/shaking/dizziness, and feel like I had more agency with my health, which was huge for me. I hope this is alright to share. |
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Post by Brownie on Aug 16, 2023 17:44:01 GMT -5
cw health and heathcare systems I'm just tired. So done. My last 6+ months have been a wash, going to the doctor, them telling me to monitor this or try this med or schedule this test and each check in is like, at least a month apart or more and so I'm just sitting around in between unable to do anything treading on eggshells because if I move too little or move too much or eat the wrong thing or laugh too hard then it triggers the pain and leaves me practically bedridden for the next three days trying to recover.
and I'm just so sick of it. Six months of constant appointments, over two years of trying to figure out what is wrong with me that, sometimes, I can't walk up a flight of stairs without nearly passing out, or that I'm shaking from walking from my bed to the bathroom-- but that other days I'm perfectly fine and can walk miles or even start a light workout... except when I push that hair too much and then I'm feeling worse than ever. I don't know what to do anymore.
I'm too afraid to make commitments because what if I wake up that morning and am physically unable to follow through? I can't get a job because some days I am so lightheaded I can't walk straight, let alone drive. I love bowling and rock climbing and playing street hockey and basketball with friends, but I've been feeling so bad the last two months and had to cancel so often that I've stopped getting invitations. And I don't blame them, because I can't give them a straight answer as to why. Two years and no answers. Over a year now of just. Waiting. Scared to move in case it triggers the pain. Knowing that it's getting worse but that there's nothing I can do but wait for that next appointment. I'm so tired. cw: health, misdiagnosis POTS and multiple centralized sensitization syndromes have been a lot like this for me, especially the six months before I was diagnosed. Similar symptoms, and then the never-ending doctor visits and nonstop waiting. Feeling like everything you do makes things worse. Having no idea what’s happening, not being able to work. Then misdiagnoses, drug reactions, endless referrals…
Being welcomed by the community here has helped me so much, even now waiting for an underlying diagnosis. I’m so sorry you’re having to go through this— I hope things get better for you, and you’re able to get answers soon.
I don’t know if this helps, but I found chronic pain resources (from places like Mayo Clinic) really helpful, especially after I learned I’d been repeatedly misdiagnosed and still had no idea what was wrong with me. It just gave me a lot of small, practical ways to manage pain/fatigue/shaking/dizziness, and feel like I had more agency with my health, which was huge for me. I hope this is alright to share. that's super helpful thank you! I'll def look into some of that. Hopefully you have more luck on your journey than I'm having on mine. |
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Post by Dark on Aug 16, 2023 17:59:33 GMT -5
I've heard from a friend that Mayo Clinic is really helpful, just to add another good opinion on it!
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Omnisexual
🅃🄴🄼🄿🄾
Being a theater kid
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Post by 🅃🄴🄼🄿🄾 on Aug 16, 2023 18:14:11 GMT -5
Trigger Warning, mentions of eating problems. I hate eating in the mornings. For the past few days I haven't wanted to eat much, even when my stomach growls. I absolutely hate eating at the moment, but I have to eat something or else stomach spasms and back pain will start, and it's excruciatingly painful. So now, I'm stuck having to eat and hate myself afterwards. Brownie I hope the doctors can figure out what's wrong really soon. Your situation sounds like it absolutely sucks. Like Darkwillow said, Mayo Clinic is really helpful. |
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it wasn’t on the floor or anywhere nearby. It just seems like such a weird thing to take especially since I had my phone and debit card in the bag. Idk I’m just mad that someone would take it
