☾ ShadowClan ☾ The Wily and Proud |☾ ☼ ϟ ≈ ☁|

Cloudscar watched Cedarstar depart the vigil, no sign of disappointment or anger in his blue gaze. From the way Cedarstar had struggled to get onto Clanrock earlier that evening, the leader needed the sleep. Cloudscar had no doubt that the young leader meant any disrespect by leaving early, but rather, it had been out of necessity. Glancing quietly from side to side and seeing many of his clanmates' eyes closed, he silently inched closer to Stormfury and pressed his nose to his son's fur. In the silence, he allowed the grief tearing at his chest to wash over him once again.

Thank you StarClan, for giving me the gift of time with him - however short it was. He prayed into the pitch black night. Though, if I had it my way you would have taken me instead.

That certainly wasn’t what she was expecting. “Huh?” She looked at him, lifting her head to meet his gaze. “What do you mean?” She clarified after a moment.

        The darkness never ended. Each step felt like the same one taken over and over again. Cedarstar couldn’t feel his paws. They were raw from his wandering, but no blood seeped from them. How long had it been? He didn’t know anymore. He didn’t care. He kept just moving. One paw after another in a rhythm that had no end. The shadows no longer scared him. The chill of the Darkness seeped too far into his bones to make him shiver. He felt nothing. No anger. No pain. No sorrow. He let numbness lead him into a trance. It was his only defense in his endless wandering of his dark prison.

        With every step, came the whispers.

        “This is where a nobody like you belongs,” they told him. “This is where the forgotten rot away.”

        And he believed them.

        A snap of twigs in the distance interrupted his steps. Had he truly heard it or was it not real? He couldn’t pull himself to care, but Cedarstar slothfully looked anyway. His eyes felt heavy and strained as he searched the shadows for the source of the sound. He never saw any other sign of life in this deathly forest. The mist continued to coil in swirl like toxic gas. The darkness under the bracken ever endless. He must have imagined it.

        As he turned away, he caught the shadows move. Cedarstar’s eyes sharpened and a pitch black tom slipped from the dark as if it birthed him. His red-amber eyes lit with surprise as he stared back at Cedarstar. Breathlessness caught his deep voice. "I finally found you.”

        Cedarstar squinted, but otherwise didn’t move. The tom was larger than him and his pelt was mauled with scars. He stepped forward and lifted his head like he was trying to be impressive. Cedarstar didn’t think so. He turned to continue his endless wander.

        “Stop!” The word came as a demand from the black tom, but Cedarstar ignored him. With a growl, the scarred tom bounded up beside him. “It took me this long to find you. You could at least hear me out.”

        Cedarstar wouldn’t look at him. He closed his eyes, trying to get back into the trance of nothingness, because outside of it, the pain was too much.

        The black tom clicked his tongue in irritation. “They warned me about you, but I didn’t think you could be this bad.” He surged forward and cut in front of Cedarstar’s path that Cedarstar ran into him. “I’m real, and you’re going to listen to me.”

        The feeling of another cat’s fur was like a forgotten memory. When he ran into the black tom, he felt warmth come from his scarred pelt. It shot a crack through Cedarstar’s trance. For the first time in ages, he stepped backwards.

        Satisfaction curled as a cold smile on the black tom’s lips. “You’re–”

        He said Cedarstar’s name, but the sound of it was lost to a ghastly wind. This made no sense. Cedarstar looked the tom up and down, but his very presence shattered what Cedarstar believed. “I thought I was alone.”

        The black tom tilted his head. “Probably because everyone who is here remembers you being the first one here.”

        Cedarstar slowly blinked. “What does that mean?”

        “It means all the ones StarClan abandoned before you were forgotten before you arrived, so when they sent you here, you were all alone.” The black tom flicked his tail around. “But now there are more that StarClan has turned their backs on. You just chose not to see them because you walked your punishment like a good little sinner, hm? You’re the one everyone here is afraid of becoming, you know.”

        His words crawled like ants on Cedarstar’s skin. His fur prickled. “I don’t understand.”

        The tom huffed. “I don’t expect you to, but the rest of us do. We refuse to walk StarClan’s punishment and I refuse to let you continue yours.”

        The pain of StarClan’s abandonment leeched back into Cedarstar’s heart. He swung his head to escape it. “I have to continue." His ears rang hollow as the pain felt like an endless pit. He needed to fall back into that trance. "Get out of my way.”

        “No.”

        Cedarstar bared his teeth at him. “Who do you think you are that you think you can stop me?”

        The tom tilted his head up and one of his fangs was bared in his smirk. “My name is Blackadder.”

        “I’ve never heard of you.”

        Blackadder chuckled. He stepped around Cedarstar. The way his tail slid along Cedarstar’s flank made him tense. “I don’t expect you to know who I am,” Blackadder said calmly. “You died before I was born, after all.”

        “Before–?” Cedarstar staggered. He stepped away from the scarred tom. Blackadder was well built, his muscles rippling under his pelt. If Cedarstar had to guess, he was the age of a senior warrior. He looked older than him.“What?”

        Blackadder stopped in front of him and gave a sad sigh. “You’ve been here a long time, my friend. I’m from RiverClan, but I still know of you. You’re the famed warrior who trained two of ShadowClan’s strongest warriors at the same time. You turned a blind cat into one of the greatest warriors in all the Clans.”

        Cedarstar backed several steps away, but Blackadder followed him. “N-no,” he tried swallowing, but his throat was dry. “N-no, it hasn’t been that long.” He didn’t like what Blackadder was implying. How was Blackadder older than him if he was born after him? His apprentices just became warriors, how could they be two of the greatest in all the Clans? Cedarstar shouted. “I haven’t been here that long!”

        Blackadder leaned forward when Cedarstar could no longer move. He felt the tom’s cold breath on his shoulder. “I’m sorry,” Blackadder’s tone felt genuine. “I truly am. StarClan has forsaken you for several seasons, my friend, but you’re not alone.”

        The thundering of Cedarstar's heart could've been heard for miles. He wanted to cry out. He wanted to scream. Yet, tears would not come to his face and his aching stole his voice away. He ground his teeth and clamped his eyes shut. Blackadder pressed against him and Cedarstar’s heart broke. Sobs choked through his clenched teeth.

        “You’re not alone.”

        Blackadder sat with him until Cedarstar could get a breath. He let his sobs pour out. He let the anguish of the betrayal overcome him. If it had truly been so long that he wandered, then he truly was destined to wander forever. Cedarstar screamed until his voice broke.

        The shadows were still haunting, the darkness as cold as ever, and the fog still blurred the world, but the pain Cedarstar denied for seasons finally felt like it was keeping its distance. His paws were throbbing and his neck felt strained. He realized how exhausted he was and he wanted to lay down into an endless sleep, but Blackadder spurred him with a nudge.

        “You shouldn’t give up, my friend.” Blackadder stood and lowered his head so he could meet Cedarstar’s hanging eyes. “Like you, I have been forsaken by StarClan.” He paused in case Cedarstar wanted to speak, but Cedarstar just stared at him. Blackadder shrugged. “I sought to unite the Clans. To bring peace to the forest, but StarClan didn’t approve.” He motioned to his scarred pelt as if Cedarstar should know what he meant. “They were cruel to me for my ambitions. Tell me, how were they cruel to you? I heard you had died a hero.”

        Cedarstar turned his face away. How he died. He hadn’t thought about it in a long time. He’d been laying in the medicine den, begging. “I did everything for ShadowClan.” His voice felt scratchy and he numbed himself to the pain of the memories. A pride he once had would’ve caused him to spit in Blackadder’s face. To not talk about it, but he no longer cared. He couldn’t think of anything he cared about. “I gave ShadowClan and StarClan everything I was. I fought for my clanmates. I saved my apprentices. I just had one dream, but my medicine cat and StarClan let me die before I could achieve it.” He shook his head and gazed at the forest with puzzlement. “How could it have been too much to ask for?”

        Blackadder was quiet as if waiting for something to answer Cedarstar’s question, but the silence echoed through the night. Blackadder softly inquired. “What was your dream?”

        Cedarstar closed his eyes. He enjoyed the sensation, he realized, of how it felt to not care. Not care about ShadowClan. Not care about StarClan. Not care about his death or situation. He didn’t even care that Blackadder pulled him from his endless walk. Didn’t care that he broke down. He didn’t ever want to care again.

        Cedarstar took a deep and proper breath. “It doesn’t matter.” He stood up and shook out his pelt. Grime from endless seasons fell from it. “It’ll never come true now.”

        He heard the growl in Blackadder’s throat as he turned. “So, you’re going to walk away?” Blackadder said.

        Cedarstar didn’t turn around, but he shrugged. He felt lighter. “I’m dead. Why should I care?”

        There was a scuffle of dirt and Blackadder was suddenly blocking Cedarstar’s path once more. “You should care because what they’re doing is wrong. StarClan needs to be stopped. They’re punishing cats for no good reason at all.”

        Cedarstar snorted. From the look in Blackadder’s red-amber eyes, he had a suspicion there was a built up rage waiting to be unleashed within him. Even so, Cedarstar let his voice drip with doubt. “You want to go against StarClan?”

        Blackadder narrowed his eyes and appeared to study Cedarstar’s face. “I want them to remember us,” he said slowly. “I want them to regret forgetting about us. You can make them regret ever letting you die.”

        Cedarstar glanced upward to the black sky with no stars. “How could anyone possibly do that?”

        A dark grin coiled on Blackadder’s face. “You get what they love most. I have a plan, but I need help.”

        It made his spine tingle to think of Blackadder going after what StarClan loved most. Cedarstar could only think of the five things it could be. “You’re going to attack the Clans?”

        Blackadder shook his head. “Not attack. I’m going to expose StarClan to them. I’m going to show them the punishment StarClan has for anyone who strays from their path. I’m going to make StarClan weak by turning the Clans against them.”

        Cedarstar flicked his ear twice. He didn’t like the sound of Blackadder’s plans. “I don’t care,” he stated the words to catch himself. He didn’t care about Blackadder. He didn’t care about the Clans. He didn’t care what happened to StarClan. Cedarstar closed his eyes to get back to the peace of not caring. He didn’t realize Blackadder was staring at him.

        “What happened to you?” Blackadder asked. “You used to be a strong warrior. I had clanmates who wanted to train multiple apprentices like you did. ShadowClan kept your legacy alive. They told of how you killed that fox on your own to save your apprentice. Yet, here you are. Giving up.”

        Cedarstar huffed and almost smiled. It felt so good to not care about Blackadder’s words. “Don’t meet your heroes, kit.”

        With a growl, Blackadder shoved him. Cedarstar stumbled back, but didn’t retaliate. For all Blackadder’s muscles, that shove felt weak.

        Blackadder raised his voice. “You can’t help me get back at StarClan. You were a legendary mentor. You can be so again.” He smirked when he caught the surprise in Cedarstar’s eyes. “Join me. Help me coax the living to this place and we’ll make StarClan regret ever abandoning us.”

        He didn’t care. Cedarstar didn’t care. He kept repeating the thought over and over again. Yet, he got hooked on the chance of being a mentor again. Was it possible? Could he do it again? Could he train young cats to be the best they could be? It was a better thought than going back to his wandering. He swallowed. “You could make me a mentor again?”

        Blackadder nodded. “I wouldn’t put a limit on the apprentices you would be allowed to train.”

        Cedarstar flicked his ear twice. The thought was tempting. Like Blackadder put a juicy mouse in front of him and he was starving, but he wasn’t about to start caring. Not even for the apprentices. He was better off if he didn’t care.

        Cedarstar shrugged. He wasn’t going to show Blackadder how badly he wanted this. “I have nothing better to do, but don’t think I care about your vendetta against StarClan.”

        Blackadder stepped up to him and his cool smirk returned. “I don’t need you to care about anything. I just need to know you’ll do what I ask.”

        Cedarstar didn’t back down from Blackadder’s red-amber gaze. He saw the same darkness as the forest in the tom’s eyes. The same starless-ness as the sky shaded his pupils. “Whatever,” Cedarstar said. He was desperate to hold onto this uncaring freedom. He didn’t want to feel like he was making a pact with a devil. “Lead the way.”

        Blackadder’s cold grin gave Cedarstar a chill. The scarred tom turned to slip back into the shadows that birthed him. His tail brushed Cedarstar’s pelt to prompt him to follow. To defeat his doubts, he didn’t hesitate to enter the blackness after Blackadder.

        “I’ll introduce you to the others I’ve recruited.” In the darkness, Blackadder’s voice sounded like it came from every direction. “Then you can begin. I’ll send apprentices your way and you can make them stronger. I don’t care how you do it. There are no rules here. We don’t follow StarClan anymore. Just make the whelps stronger.”

        Cedarstar found a cold smile on his lips. “That I can do.”



The shadows of his dream still filled Cedarstar's mind when the morning prompted him to wake. A cool, leaf-bare breeze drifted through the cover of the den entrance and his fur prickled at its chill. Cedarstar opened his eyes, but the world was blurred by a black-violet shade. He had a feeling he was where he needed to be, but he didn't quite recognize where he was. Was he in his den? Someone else's? Cedarstar closed his eyes with a hefty sigh. His paws were still throbbing with ache and he silently cursed the apprentice that caused the wound to his shoulder; yet, he couldn't remember which apprentice it was. Doesn't matter, he thought with ears falling back. I won't go as easy on any of them next round. The breeze stirred inside the den again and Cedarstar curled up to cover his scars. He shivered, trying to steal as many moments of hollow peace as he could. He focused on thinking about nothing to keep the pain in his heart from leeching in. I don't care about anything, he reminded himself. I don't care.

Cardinalblaze had, as promised, woken up early for the dividing of morning patrols. While he hadn’t gotten an amazingly restful sleep, he did get enough to feel far more capable than he had yesterday. Taking a deep breath of the chilly dawn air, he padded out of the Warrior’s den and took his place in the center of camp.

Lilywhisper paced outside of the Warrior’s den, perking up as she saw Cardinalblaze awake and moving. She padded over to him, glancing at the den to see if Houndthroat was indeed awake or not.

Waspflame yawned, rolling over to nudge Oakfall as he rumbled, tired yet determined. “Up. Morning patrol.”

Houndthroat was already outside the warrior's den. He slept a little, but it still had been restless. He wanted to be up early to get on the first patrol. He had to be acknowledged somehow. He'd just been waiting for Cardinalblaze to get up. As much as he didn't want to speak to the deputy, he was there for the first assignment. "I'm here for a patrol," he stated bluntly.

Stonesong hesitated a half second before moving to follow after him to the secluded spot of camp. She looked at him, still confused. “I…” she started. “I’m not sure what you mean? They were like me?”

Closesky padded up to Cloudscar to assist in carrying the deceased warrior. "It's a shame," he mewed softly. "We should be able to bury Moonpetal too."


Ashrock pinned his ears back. StarClan, why was this so hard? "Maybe we should just forget it," he said in his fretfulness. "I can't stand that pain again. I'm not worth it, Stonesong. I can't risk..." He clamped his jaws shut. He was pacing and he hadn't even noticed. Each lengthy hair on his pelt was standing on its end. "Voidfang and...and Oceanstorm...I...I felt for them and they died, alright? I don't want you to die too."


A frown slapped on Houndthroat's face. Just the two of them? "You've got to be kitting me," he grumbled sourly. Yet, he turned away to follow the deputy's order. He was the first cat to volunteer for a patrol. The first warrior up and he was just assigned with Lilywhisper? The last time the two of them hunted together, they only brought back Lilywhisper's sole lizard. Did Cardinalblaze think he wasn't worth putting on a patrol with other warriors? Warriors that actually mattered in the eyes of the Clan? At least Lilywhisper is tolerable, Houndthroat thought grumpily.

Cloudscar nodded. “He was a true ShadowClan warrior. I hope he knows that.” He began to pad out of camp slowly, not wanting to outpace the other elder. He glanced over at Closesky “I’m thankful Northstar gave me the opportunity to mentor him. I learned as much from him as I hope he learned from me.”

Pinekit woke when his sister did, whimpering softly when he realized the body was gone. He stared after Cloudscar and Closesky, eyes wide.

Cardinalblaze winced lightly at the groan he heard in Houndthroat's mutter, though the other tom had turned away too quickly for the deputy to question or even somewhat scold him. The thought of scolding was probably the hardest part of it all, so he was grateful for the excuse not to. He watched Lilywhisper quickly follow after Houndthroat, before he released a light sigh and turned back to the rest of his Clanmates.

He caught sight of Closesky, Falcontalon, and Cloudscar moving to leave and bury Stormfury. He knew he could get Closesky's attention afterwards. With an aching heart knowing that Stormfury's last time in camp would be today, he focused back on the patrols.

(List anyone ya got for some morning patrols uwu )

Tumblefoot, Tigerfury, and Smokestorm padded out of the warrior's den to join a patrol. Smokestorm, typically one to sleep in, just wanted to get his mind on something that wasn't his mate staying permanently in the nursery.

Eaglesight slipped out of the warrior's den to go check on Grovekit and Flowerkit.

Palepaw let out a quiet groan as consciousness found him. His shoulder ached with pain like a wasp's sting. When he opened his eyes, everything was fuzzy and white, but the scent told him it was his mother. He purred softly and stretched out the paw, opposite of the shoulder that hurt, to prod at her.


Kinkfire slowly lumbered out of the warrior's den. Her stomach was rounder and she felt discomfort with every movement, but she wasn't about to shirk on her duties. She padded over to Cardinalblaze to join a patrol, but had to pause as queasiness overcame her.  

Starrylight startled awake as Palepaw poked her, taking in the sight of her son awake sent a way of relief through her. "Palepaw! How are you feeling?"

Cardinalblaze nodded, ready to call out the patrols, only to nearly scoff out his muzzle when he spotted Lynxdapple siddling right up to where Spottedpaw was approaching. The small tom had been on one of the last patrols the night before, and he was once again right and ready for the dawn patrol too. How did he manage that much energy? Shaking his head once to clear his chattering thoughts, he cleared his throat.

"Okay. We're going to have to survey the territory as much as we can. Burninghope's patrol yesterday reported alot of mud holes, as well as Carrion that washed up from the flood. If you see any, bury it. We can't let any strong scents remain while prey-maulers are clearly becoming more of a threat." The deputy started. "That being said, we also need prey. I'm going to put a pause on Camp rebuilding for now, we've got enough done for now. Thistlestalk, I want you to take Tumblefoot and Goldberry out on a hunting patrol. But I want you three to head towards Carrionplace. There's likely the most prey there, but it's also the most risky. I trust you three can keep your wits and head out of there right away if any trace of a prey-mauler is present."

He refused to look long at Goldberry as the tom had silently approached earlier. Blinking awkwardly, he righted himself.

"Smokestorm, I want you to take Lynxdapple and Spottedpaw out to do a border patrol along the Skyclan border. I want to be sure that the patrol that left had no issues that way, so make sure you can catch scent of their crossing when you get close." He nodded to the tom, before looking at the dutiful Lynxdapple and Spottedpaw.

After another moment, the deputy looked at Tigerfury. "I actually need you for something specific here in Camp, if you don't mind. It's nothing bad, the opposite really, but I have to discuss something with Closesky, and I want you there as well." He finally spoke, after he did his best to hold the powerful tom's gaze. Tigerfury radiated a strength that always made Cardinalblaze shuffle his paws. No longer could he do that though.