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Post by Saint Ambrosef on Feb 9, 2024 15:54:02 GMT -5
This is a thread for the older forum members to give practical living advice to the younger forumers. Need to learn how to recover your first apartment's security deposit? Unsure what's pragmatic for college? Thinking about moving in with someone you started dating two weeks ago? Job offer sounds too good to be true? Learn from our dumb mistakes. Old geezers are welcomed to drop random advice they wish someone had told them five years ago, and young ones are welcomed to ask questions or advice.
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Post by brooksie on Feb 9, 2024 16:01:08 GMT -5
dont pay something just because someone tells you you have to! i was signing with a leasing company and multiple times they told me i had to be a $1000 deposit. this deposit had already been paid by the other roommates but they would have 100% taken my money if i gave it to them. people will try to screw you over and taking advantage, if it feels wrong push back. tell people they're wrong and usually you will get your way
ALSO! love, relationships. if it feels wrong, it is. every single time ive gotten hurt it was something i knew was wrong. ive lost so much of my life mourning things i knew i shouldve never gone into from the start. i didnt learn, and i wont learn, and i'll continue to make this mistake as i am a certified lover boy, but please try to avoid it if you can. if you like her but you know its wrong dont do it if its not a "YES!! 100%" its a "no," please remember this this is literally like the one piece of advice i have truly realized is true as ive lived its the people who wanted you first that hurt u the most i swear
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Post by lazzylake on Feb 9, 2024 16:27:13 GMT -5
Hey guys! I’m still technically a young’n but will join the elders in a few months! I would like advice how to keep yourself motivated when taking college courses. Recently, I’ve been trying to figure out how to make my courseload manageable without breaking under pressure. Not to mention getting everything turned in on time.
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Post by Saint Ambrosef on Feb 9, 2024 16:39:55 GMT -5
Hey guys! I’m still technically a young’n but will join the elders in a few months! I would like advice how to keep yourself motivated when taking college courses. Recently, I’ve been trying to figure out how to make my courseload manageable without breaking under pressure. Not to mention getting everything turned in on time. What's your major, how many credits are you taking, and what year are you?
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Post by Saint Ambrosef on Feb 9, 2024 17:09:10 GMT -5
I am youngish at 21. I have a lot of anxiety about the future. What’s the best way to ease that? Could you expand a little? Is there something specific about the future that you have anxiety about, e.g. uncertainly where you want to go in life?
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#f0a9e4
Name Colour
Captain Americat
"Don't frown, someone could be falling in love with your smile." - Teen Wolf
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Post by Captain Americat on Feb 9, 2024 17:45:01 GMT -5
brooksie I’m an old coot. But, I need advice. Anyone can answer. How do you know if it’s a “yes”? What if it’s actually a “no”… but right now, in this moment, your heart is sure that it’s right? Isn’t love supposed to have a little risk and taking leaps of faith?
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Pixie
2024 is already bad; 2025 will be my year fr
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Post by Pixie on Feb 9, 2024 18:52:43 GMT -5
I am youngish at 21. I have a lot of anxiety about the future. What’s the best way to ease that? Could you expand a little? Is there something specific about the future that you have anxiety about, e.g. uncertainly where you want to go in life? Going to college and thinking it might amount to nothing. Dread about how I might never fulfill my potential. Wanting to do so much and having so little time.
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#f0a9e4
Name Colour
Captain Americat
"Don't frown, someone could be falling in love with your smile." - Teen Wolf
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Post by Captain Americat on Feb 9, 2024 19:15:48 GMT -5
Pixie I’m going to be real with you… I’m “older” and I still haven’t figured out what the heck I’m doing. I have two degrees that I don’t use and college debt. Just because we’re older doesn’t mean we’ve got it figured out xD That’s the most real thing I can say, ha. I’m definitely working on figuring my life out now, though. So… on a positive note: my advice is that if you realize you’ve made a mistake or that you took the wrong path, perhaps you really didn’t. Maybe you were meant to go in the “wrong” direction to know that it wasn’t meant for you so that you could be led towards the thing you are meant to do. I have a lot of anxiety over that kind of stuff and feeling like I messed up my life and that it’s too late for me. But, I think you’ve just got to stop putting limits on yourself and realize that you’ve got your whole life ahead of you. If you’re unsure of your future, don’t think of the future. Think of the here and now. Do what you want to now and live as much as you can. Along the way, I hope it’ll help you discover what the best thing for you is. My biggest thing is… I don’t want to wake up one day and regret the things I didn’t do. So, do all those things and make mistakes. You’ll have a beautiful story to tell one day, even if it seems scary and a mess and all that now. I’m trying so hard to live this and believe this. (Even though I don’t use my college degrees and I hate that I’m in debt… I learned a lot and grew a lot. Maybe I’d have done things differently had I actually known what I wanted to do back then. But I don’t regret it because it’s part of my story.)
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Post by brooksie on Feb 9, 2024 19:30:30 GMT -5
brooksie I’m an old coot. But, I need advice. Anyone can answer. How do you know if it’s a “yes”? What if it’s actually a “no”… but right now, in this moment, your heart is sure that it’s right? Isn’t love supposed to have a little risk and taking leaps of faith? for me, in my experience as someone probably younger than you (21) its when you have reservations if its a yes in your heart and it ends up wrong later thats okay, that happens. but if you have any reservations dont go into something thats not a "hell yes" i feel like a "hell yes" can end up going wrong, but a "yes.. but i dont know.. but i guess i will" i feel like has a much bigger chance of going wrong please dont take relationship advice from me however, i obviously don't have the greatest track record if your heart is 100% in it, jump all the way in. if youre heart is 70% in it, maybe dont. i will never take this advice and have gotten hurt from less than 50%s, but i think its a safe bet. im just a people pleaser, i mean, im screwed up today over something i was 30% on two days ago and like 5% on two weeks ago. if i just listened to myself and what i knew was true i would have avoided making some mistakes i hugely regret and not gotten hurt rn but if you believed in something and your heart was in it, you never did anything wrong. sometimes things just dont work and you can never predict that TLDR: trust your intuition, its usually right. everytime something has gone wrong for me it was because i ignored my intuition
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#add8e6
Name Colour
*Ravenpaw*
Warrior Fanatic
*reads books in a corner*
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Post by *Ravenpaw* on Feb 9, 2024 20:00:53 GMT -5
old coot here
A little something I'd thought of recently: Jobs are not meant to be fulfilling. It's a way to get money so that you can buy things you need and pay your bills. And maybe have a bit of fun. Keep your hobbies as hobbies so you have something to look forward to.
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Pixie
2024 is already bad; 2025 will be my year fr
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Post by Pixie on Feb 9, 2024 20:13:09 GMT -5
Pixie I’m going to be real with you… I’m “older” and I still haven’t figured out what the heck I’m doing. I have two degrees that I don’t use and college debt. Just because we’re older doesn’t mean we’ve got it figured out xD That’s the most real thing I can say, ha. I’m definitely working on figuring my life out now, though. So… on a positive note: my advice is that if you realize you’ve made a mistake or that you took the wrong path, perhaps you really didn’t. Maybe you were meant to go in the “wrong” direction to know that it wasn’t meant for you so that you could be led towards the thing you are meant to do. I have a lot of anxiety over that kind of stuff and feeling like I messed up my life and that it’s too late for me. But, I think you’ve just got to stop putting limits on yourself and realize that you’ve got your whole life ahead of you. If you’re unsure of your future, don’t think of the future. Think of the here and now. Do what you want to now and live as much as you can. Along the way, I hope it’ll help you discover what the best thing for you is. My biggest thing is… I don’t want to wake up one day and regret the things I didn’t do. So, do all those things and make mistakes. You’ll have a beautiful story to tell one day, even if it seems scary and a mess and all that now. I’m trying so hard to live this and believe this. (Even though I don’t use my college degrees and I hate that I’m in debt… I learned a lot and grew a lot. Maybe I’d have done things differently had I actually known what I wanted to do back then. But I don’t regret it because it’s part of my story.) This is encouraging. Thank you. <3
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Post by Saint Ambrosef on Feb 9, 2024 20:36:40 GMT -5
old coot here A little something I'd thought of recently: Jobs are not meant to be fulfilling. It's a way to get money so that you can buy things you need and pay your bills. And maybe have a bit of fun. Keep your hobbies as hobbies so you have something to look forward to. 👆👆👆 The fastest way to ruin your hobbies it to make your income dependent on them. Unless your hobby happens to be an incredibly valued skill that easily transitions into a comfortable, well-paying job (e.g. if you like car work, be a diesel mechanic!), then get a job you can tolerate and that allows you time to do your hobbies.
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Post by Saint Ambrosef on Feb 9, 2024 20:38:02 GMT -5
Could you expand a little? Is there something specific about the future that you have anxiety about, e.g. uncertainly where you want to go in life? Going to college and thinking it might amount to nothing. Dread about how I might never fulfill my potential. Wanting to do so much and having so little time. What are your aspirations that you are worried about not fulfilling, and why do you feel crunched for time? Sorry for all the questions, I just want to make sure I'm getting a good read on your situation!
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Post by Saint Ambrosef on Feb 9, 2024 20:39:14 GMT -5
YEAH YOU GOT THIS OLD PEOPLE!!! any advice for people with a lot of homework and little time? (also i dont mean to offend anyone with the top sentence 😊) high school or college
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#add8e6
Name Colour
*Ravenpaw*
Warrior Fanatic
*reads books in a corner*
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Post by *Ravenpaw* on Feb 9, 2024 20:44:30 GMT -5
old coot here A little something I'd thought of recently: Jobs are not meant to be fulfilling. It's a way to get money so that you can buy things you need and pay your bills. And maybe have a bit of fun. Keep your hobbies as hobbies so you have something to look forward to. 👆👆👆 The fastest way to ruin your hobbies it to make your income dependent on them. Unless your hobby happens to be an incredibly valued skill that easily transitions into a comfortable, well-paying job (e.g. if you like car work, be a diesel mechanic!), then get a job you can tolerate and that allows you time to do your hobbies. Exactly.
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Post by valleylight on Feb 9, 2024 21:33:27 GMT -5
Bit of a specific one, but any advice on how to budget meat? I have ferritin deficiency but can’t take iron supplements, so I have to eat as much red meat as I healthily can (3-4 times a week.) Low key have no idea how I’m going to afford it
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Post by Saint Ambrosef on Feb 9, 2024 21:56:39 GMT -5
Bit of a specific one, but any advice on how to budget meat? I have ferritin deficiency but can’t take iron supplements, so I have to eat as much red meat as I healthily can (3-4 times a week.) Low key have no idea how I’m going to afford it My favorite cheap meat is chicken legs. People tend to shy away from bone-in chicken but it's like 1/3 the price (I can get them for like $1.19/lb around here). Eat them as-in, or throw them in a crockpot to make shredded chicken. Bone-in thighs work as well. Regarding other red meat like beef, I have noticed that nicer grocery stores in high-class areas tend to have a meat clearance section - stuff that's perfectly fine, but rich people turn their noses up at meat that's been sitting a few days, so the store reduces the price. You can ask the butcher if there's a specific day they label the markdowns. I've scored great meat (beef shanks, ground lamb, etc) for half off that way and used it to stock my freezer.
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Post by valleylight on Feb 9, 2024 22:16:27 GMT -5
My favorite cheap meat is chicken legs. People tend to shy away from bone-in chicken but it's like 1/3 the price (I can get them for like $1.19/lb around here). Eat them as-in, or throw them in a crockpot to make shredded chicken. Bone-in thighs work as well. Regarding other red meat like beef, I have noticed that nicer grocery stores in high-class areas tend to have a meat clearance section - stuff that's perfectly fine, but rich people turn their noses up at meat that's been sitting a few days, so the store reduces the price. You can ask the butcher if there's a specific day they label the markdowns. I've scored great meat (beef shanks, ground lamb, etc) for half off that way and used it to stock my freezer. This is super helpful, thank you!
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Post by Brownie on Feb 9, 2024 22:37:58 GMT -5
Bit of a specific one, but any advice on how to budget meat? I have ferritin deficiency but can’t take iron supplements, so I have to eat as much red meat as I healthily can (3-4 times a week.) Low key have no idea how I’m going to afford it ground beef tends to be fairly affordable pound for pound, and is very flexible. I absolutely hate the texture, but it was my staple red on a college budget. Also if you have the time and mental fortitude, couponing and/or checking sales at different markets helps.
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Post by valleylight on Feb 9, 2024 23:07:37 GMT -5
Bit of a specific one, but any advice on how to budget meat? I have ferritin deficiency but can’t take iron supplements, so I have to eat as much red meat as I healthily can (3-4 times a week.) Low key have no idea how I’m going to afford it ground beef tends to be fairly affordable pound for pound, and is very flexible. I absolutely hate the texture, but it was my staple red on a college budget. Also if you have the time and mental fortitude, couponing and/or checking sales at different markets helps. Thank you so much! Having practical advice really helps it feel more doable, like I can be proactive and start planning. Maybe I could try asking around and investigating the best places locally, for sales and bulk.
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Post by Brownie on Feb 9, 2024 23:19:14 GMT -5
ground beef tends to be fairly affordable pound for pound, and is very flexible. I absolutely hate the texture, but it was my staple red on a college budget. Also if you have the time and mental fortitude, couponing and/or checking sales at different markets helps. Thank you so much! Having practical advice really helps it feel more doable, like I can be proactive and start planning. Maybe I could try asking around and investigating the best places locally, for sales and bulk. Yes! Bulk is great if you can manage that and have somewhere to store frozen meat! I never had a freezer where I was, so I could only buy food that I was going to cook that day, but if you have the ability to freeze (and maybe even invest in a vacuum sealer? I have one now for meal prep and it's GREAT) you should totally try and meal prep and plan to buy bulk when you can ALSO stew beef is GREAT if you can figure out how to cook it. Usually very cheap, but takes some finesse not to be hard as metal. I'm still not great at it, but salting it to tenderize can work, and of course the easiest way is to slow cook it
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Post by valleylight on Feb 9, 2024 23:33:14 GMT -5
ALSO stew beef is GREAT if you can figure out how to cook it. Usually very cheap, but takes some finesse not to be hard as metal. I'm still not great at it, but salting it to tenderize can work, and of course the easiest way is to slow cook it Yes, my mom calls it crockpot steak! She’ll cook it overnight, and it’s always amazing. I love eating it leftover with rice. Definitely thinking one of my first appliance purchases will be my own crockpot, especially for beef and cooking down chicken
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Post by Saint Ambrosef on Feb 10, 2024 0:57:13 GMT -5
Fyi, stew beef is the same as chuck roast. Where I live, it's more economical to buy a chuck roast when it goes on sale for $4/lb and cut it up myself. It's gonna be tough unless it's slow cooked because of the amount of collagen in the meat - that stuff just takes time to break down.
You can usually find crockpots dirt cheap at thrift stores! I got a cute vintage one with just a simple off/on/high option for like eight bucks.
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beefur 🌳 🍃 🌊
"Great, let's round up all the useless cats and hope a tree falls on them." ~Jayfeather
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Post by beefur 🌳 🍃 🌊 on Feb 10, 2024 9:00:22 GMT -5
YEAH YOU GOT THIS OLD PEOPLE!!! any advice for people with a lot of homework and little time? (also i dont mean to offend anyone with the top sentence 😊) high school or college umm I’m in high rn but I’m going to college in like two years so high school?
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Pixie
2024 is already bad; 2025 will be my year fr
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Post by Pixie on Feb 10, 2024 9:05:35 GMT -5
Going to college and thinking it might amount to nothing. Dread about how I might never fulfill my potential. Wanting to do so much and having so little time. What are your aspirations that you are worried about not fulfilling, and why do you feel crunched for time? Sorry for all the questions, I just want to make sure I'm getting a good read on your situation! Right now I’m thinking about potentially becoming a lawyer. However, if I don’t get a reasonable scholarship for a law school, then I probably won’t do it. My college extracurriculars are also lacking currently and I’m in my third year so it seems a bit unrealistic at this point. Things I want to do: publish a book that makes people wanna cry, be a comedy vlogger, and overall, I have this desire to be well-known and loved. Also, the second I mentioned the idea of becoming a lawyer, my parents were too much into that idea. My dad is a successful business owner and my stepmom used to be a real estate agent that was in the top 20% of the state. We have a good relationship but she once told me I would probably never make as much money as she and my dad did and contribute to charities like they did. That really rubbed me the wrong way. I’ve lived a good life so far but more than anything, I want to be successful.
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Post by Brownie on Feb 10, 2024 11:04:16 GMT -5
umm I’m in high rn but I’m going to college in like two years so high school? If your homework is taking more than 1-2hrs a night regularly, you should probably figure out why that is. Are you in a place that is too distracting that makes it hard to focus? are the classes too difficult? Do the teachers have unreal expectations of students? There are different solutions for different problems. Homework shouldn't take more than 2hr max on heavy days, esp if you have a study block or a long commute or a really borning government class that you can use to try and keep studying contained to school hours Idk I might be a horrible example for this, as I was the student that would pick fights with the teachers that assigned "busy work" homework and give them all the ways that I could more producively study for the class using the time I would have wasted on that assignment. It worked sometimes--there was one prof notorious for giving lecture recordings as homework and requiring very specific note taking methods as turn in, and it took a whole squad of us basically saying that we would rather take notes in a way that was beneficial to us and not have to do two sets (because most people had to take two sets of notes because the way she required them was absouletely freaking useless for actual studying) and we basically got enough people saying they're going to turn in notes the way they use them to study for her to change her tune. We all failed a week or two of homework before she called our bluff tho, but after a few major tests showed that we did average or better and we brought that to the student dean, it eventually got thru Which is a dramatic example and I had a great peer class that took absolutely no shit from big-headed teachers (it was an advance track program, we all wanted to do well on the final exams and we were NOT gonna let busy work profs get in the way of study time for harder classes) Also grades are not worth your mental health tbh. If it takes 4hrs for a 5/5 pt daily assignment and 1hr for a 4/5... take the 4 and be happy
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