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Post by » ѕнαdσω ⚔️ on Mar 1, 2017 23:26:40 GMT -5
Dark Side of the Moon
Note page for re-worked Dark Side of the Moon: A Clans of the Valley Novel.
Hey guys, Shadz here. I've decided to go ahead and re-work my fan-fic novel. Believe it or not, it was posted to the WCF only a few months after Curse was (so it was early 2014) and so this makes it an "older" work with much more depth and detail already incorporated. The first time I posted DSOTM I wrote up to seven chapters with an 8th chapter about a quarter of the way done. I had fans that were already fans of Curse and new fans that had never read Curse. There was even some, like my good friend Skyfall, who preferred DSOTM to Curse. So I thought it was about time to bring it back. Especially sense Curse is in it's finaly chapters.
So below will be some of my ramblings including pictures/banners and my thoughts on what I want to be different from the old DSOTM. If you remember reading it, please feel free to add your own thoughts!
I hope to get DSOTM v.2 ready for official posting sometime in the next month (during or after spring break depending on how chapter 31 of Curse progresses) so get ready for some more Clans of the Valley madness!
- Shadowface(The Fallen Warrior)
Version 1 of the Banner; Modeled after the original banner
THE CHARACTERS
Spottedmoon: nothing major will change about her appearance or character in the new version. I will try to make her appear more aloof and give her a tangible fine line in her psyche between calm/collected and angry/frustrated. This is a trait passed down from her father and magnifies itself in her offspring.
Icefeather: Spottedmoon's sister may play a larger role besides just being in the flashbacks/mentioned in the prologue. While Spottedmoon is in the Between World, lots of major events are changing the landscape of the valley (as is expressed in Curse) and another set of eyes may add another layer to the story. (NOTE: Icefeather will not have her own POV. She will play a role indirectly.)
Hadiya: The Guardian of the Between World needs to be less willing to bow to the whims of StarClan and have a stronger, more personal narrative while still keeping her past secretive. I also want her past to be more "guessable" by the readers, especially when it comes to her relationship with Nathaniel, the Guardian of StarClan (The Realm of the Stars).
Ira: The Personification of Spottedmoon's rage was a wonderful character addition in the first novel, but given the already heavy female cast, I have decided to make Ira a male this go around. A very angry male! His name will either be Iroh, Nemain, Woden, or Kratos.
Other Personifications: The Male Ira will be the only one, as it it will testify to the deep, negative feelings Spottedmoon has held onto most of her life.
Shadowface: Yes, the main character from Curse will make an appearance or two in DSOTM. She will be in flashbacks and may run into Spottedmoon in between realms. Through Spottedmoon's POV I want to introduce a very different opinion on Shadowface that evolves as Spottedmoon does throughout the novel.
DSOTM VS. DSOTM V.2
Old Prologue will be tossed out. New prologue will describe/explore the repetitive dream that the main character, Spottedmoon, has during her kit-hood and possibly on into her warrior-hood.
- "Moon fire. I had dreams about it."
- "Moon fire" = her possible Cursed ties. Her eyes are silver and are often described as "moonstone" eyes.
- In the old DSOTM the dream was of her surrounded by a molten lava field and falling into a crack in the Earth. This time she will be surrounded by "Moon fire". The scenes with Hadiya and her mother will stay the same.
When Spottedmoon is sent to the Between World from StarClan, she is not "pulled apart". Instead she will go through a door (THE FIRST TIME IT WILL FINALLY BE WRITTEN INTO A COTV STORY AFTER ALL THESE YEARS OF TALKING ABOUT IT). Once she passes all the way through she hears what sounds like lock clicking and screeching back together. She turns and the door is sealed shut. The door will remain there throughout the entire novel as a reminder of where she wants to end up. (StarClan.)
- Doors: natural passageway between the non-living realms.
- Portals: "cat-made" engraved circles that transport the living to other realms.
In Curse there was a MAJOR discrepancy in the timeline when it came to how old Spottedmoon and her siblings were compared to Shadowface. Spottedmoon and her siblings were born around two years apart. So when Shadowface was an apprentice, it would make sense that Spottedmoon was old enough to be a deputy. I got to remember this when writing about Spottedmoon's siblings.
As the landscape of the Between World is unpredictable, I thought it would provide some humor (and be as a reminder) for the door to appear randomly throughout Spottedmoon's journey. I can imagine her getting easily angered/frustrated over the presence of the door constantly showing up when she doesn't want to be reminded of what she has to do. I also thought there could be an emotional tie to the door later in the novel where she might beg the door to let her out and to let her be with her daughter who ran away when she was a kit/apprentice and was never seen since.
A one-sided conversation between her and the door would be amusing. x'D
TO - DO LIST
1. Make a list of Spottedmoon's soul-shards and decide what order they will appear in the story and what they are represented by. Might need to do some research on souls to get some ideas. (Better ones).
2. Choose a name for the male Ira!
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Post by Dingoleap on Mar 2, 2017 0:16:52 GMT -5
I AM READY
I never actually read the original DSOTM, but I'm excited! I have a few thoughts on Spottedmoon that might be worth sharing... I'll type them up whan I get home.
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Post by » ѕнαdσω ⚔️ on Mar 2, 2017 0:21:09 GMT -5
SO AM I. I'VE MISSED DSOTM. <3
Oh man, you are in for a treat then! It's wildly different than Curse despite both being in the same series.
Oooh, can't wait to see! I'm about to shut down my laptop but I'll open up the forums on my phone.
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Post by Dingoleap on Mar 2, 2017 0:23:50 GMT -5
I've always been intrigued by Spottedmoon, so this will be interesting! It's mostly some ideas on behaviour that I've observed in friends and family, who seem to match her description pretty well. Since I won't actually be home for a while, it seems, I'll type it up on my phone and get back to you in about ten minutes.  |
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Post by » ѕнαdσω ⚔️ on Mar 2, 2017 0:24:30 GMT -5
OH, RIP.
I SHOULD HAVE POSTED A SMALL SUMMARY FOR WHAT DSOTM IS ABOUT.
Um, so IN THE MOST BASIC TERMS: main character Spottedmoon was not a good kitty but did the bad things for good intentions so after she dies the seven judges of the stars decide to test her in the between world to see if she is worthy to hunt in the eternal realm of StarClan or be sent to the dark forest in eternal suffering.
Oh, and she was murdered just before she was to become leader of GlacierClan.
That's important. o3o
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Post by Dingoleap on Mar 2, 2017 0:26:32 GMT -5
Ooooh, drama!
Yeah, I vaguely remember that XD
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Post by » ѕнαdσω ⚔️ on Mar 2, 2017 0:26:59 GMT -5
Spottedmoon has intrigued many, and I have yet to find out how I accomplished that lol.
She is one of my favorites to write, though Snow beats her by a considerable amount of points.
That will actually help a lot as family will play a big role in her "self-discovery" in DSOTM. I kinda glanced over it in the old version but I want it to be more prominent this time around.
*marks time*
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Post by Dingoleap on Mar 2, 2017 0:33:23 GMT -5
I think it's because she's so mysterious!
Family is great, and it would be great to read, as well. I have a bit of a soft spot for family-centric stories.
I'm nearly done!
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Post by Dingoleap on Mar 2, 2017 0:36:17 GMT -5
Behaviour;
Here are some observations I've made based on people I know who walk the line between calm and angry;
* really minor changes in their facial expressions - I mean twitchy muscles, particularly in between/around their eyes - and flaring their nostrils - this is a big one and is often coupled with clenching or tensing their jaw.
* Breathing deeply, especially when someone else is talking. Again, they tend to be grimacing or clenching their jaw/fists.
* Throwing things in anger when they're alone so others don't see that they've lost their composure.
* Muttering under their breath
* Palms start burning with the urge to lash out - often clench their fists to refrain from doing so. Is usually followed by throwing things when nobody else is around
* Heavy or intense breathing.
* Going to speak but ultimately holding their tongue. Often opening their mouths but not actually saying anything. I do this a lot - I'm easily annoyed, especially when my brother won't admit he's wrong. I like to have the last word - really, I don't know when to quit - so my mum often shoots my this disapproving look whenever I go to snap at him and it's pretty effective. My family knows me pretty well.
That's all for now! I don't know how well this would translate to cats, but I hope it helps somewhat!
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Post by mintedstar/fur on Mar 2, 2017 1:06:03 GMT -5
SO EXCITED! I'm one of those fans who preferred DSOTM to Curse, back in the day. But it's been so long since I've read it...
O.O
I'd input more of my thoughts, but I need to catch up with everything on the front page.
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Post by » ѕнαdσω ⚔️ on Mar 2, 2017 11:40:49 GMT -5
Dingoleap - Wow! Thank you! I can see Spottedmoon having some of those ticks. I think it will help separate her from Shadowface (since readers will probably compare the two) and also distinguish her in this novel. Minor facial changes, holding back from acting out violently, heavy breathing/nostrils flaring. I think giving her a tick with her flexing her claws into the ground repeatedly when she talks to others that annoy/frustrate her would be something neat to add. mintedstar/fur - Hey! Nothing wrong with that. (': And has you have said, my writing has improved since then (quit measurably) so maybe this will come out even better than we both remember! Take your time! I'll be here letting my mind wander lol
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Post by » ѕнαdσω ⚔️ on Mar 2, 2017 13:01:03 GMT -5
NOTES:
As the landscape of the Between World is unpredictable, I thought it would provide some humor (and be as a reminder) for the door to appear randomly throughout Spottedmoon's journey. I can imagine her getting easily angered/frustrated over the presence of the door constantly showing up when she doesn't want to be reminded of what she has to do. I also thought there could be an emotional tie to the door later in the novel where she might beg the door to let her out and to let her be with her daughter who ran away when she was a kit/apprentice and was never seen since.
A one-sided conversation between her and the door would be amusing. x'D
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Post by Dingoleap on Mar 2, 2017 14:13:47 GMT -5
I'm glad I could be of service! And I really like the idea of her flexing her claws when she's annoyed.
One sided conversations? Excellent. When you've been alone for a while, you really miss the company of others and may start imagining that other things are sentiment (have any of you seen Castaway?) so I imagine talking to the door could have quite an emotional impact after a while, of that was something you wanted to peruse.
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Post by » ѕнαdσω ⚔️ on Mar 2, 2017 16:19:59 GMT -5
I like to think she tears up the ground, as if having some control over it gives her a small bit of peace. That's kinda what I'm shooting for as well; exploring her wanting to have control over a situation that can't be controlled.
Well she's never truly alone in the novel. She has Hadiya with her most of the time as her reluctant guide through the Between World who helps her recover all of the lost facets of her souls. And then there's Ira (who is now going to be male. I'm thinking he might be named Kratos but it's still up in the air) who is her soul shard of rage. He won't come in till around chapter 4 I believe. I'm only planning on having a max of 20 chapters, probably less, for DSOTM. It's not as complex as Curse, but it is mysterious in its simplicity.
And then of course a plot twist will be involved. Can't have a CotV novel without a plot twist. x'D
But yes, I have seen Castaway! In a way Spottedmoon is deserted in this place and is alone in her choices for her journey, but she still gets help/guidance from her two companions. The door will be more of an annoyance that turns into a psychological trigger.
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Post by » ѕнαdσω ⚔️ on Mar 2, 2017 16:31:41 GMT -5
Since I've been reading Dante's Inferno, I will be incorporating elements explored in The Inferno and combining them into the landscape of the Between World. There is a lot of really great stuff to use/be inspired by!
Oh, and Shadowface from Curse was added to the character list. :'3
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Post by mintedstar/fur on Mar 2, 2017 16:31:53 GMT -5
Aw, but I like psychological triggers. O.O
Ha, love the ideas up so far, and for some odd reason I really like the idea of Ira/Kratos being male now.
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Post by » ѕнαdσω ⚔️ on Mar 2, 2017 16:36:00 GMT -5
mintedstar/fur - The door will be doing that, but not till later in the story. :'P Thank you! And thank goodness, I'm glad you agree. I just remember some readers wanting a male presence, so I thought it would be easier to make Ira a male sense she already had a big role in the old DSOTM. Its kinda like the opposite of the main "crew" in Curse: Rushstorm (male), Eaglefrost (male), and Shadowface (female). Though I would like to throw Darkmoon in with them at this point. x'3
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Post by mintedstar/fur on Mar 2, 2017 17:11:33 GMT -5
I throw in Darkmoon anyway. :3
And I just like the thought of it. Seem right.
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Post by Dingoleap on Mar 2, 2017 18:28:21 GMT -5
PSYCHOLOGICAL TRIGGERS HECK YES
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Post by Brownie on Mar 2, 2017 19:36:32 GMT -5
omg DSOTM was the best owo
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Post by mintedstar/fur on Mar 2, 2017 20:35:01 GMT -5
...Now I want all the other Clans of the Valley books. :'(
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Post by Owlmoon on Mar 2, 2017 23:05:56 GMT -5
This, I gotta read. First chapter? Prologue?
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Post by » ѕнαdσω ⚔️ on Mar 3, 2017 11:52:42 GMT -5
x'D Brownie - <3 Owlmoon - This is just the planning page. Once I get more things straightened out then I'll post the story. (': |
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Post by Owlmoon on Mar 3, 2017 11:56:23 GMT -5
Oh, ok. makes more sense. Love the cover thingy..
[smear:FF0000] When's it coming out?[/smear:00FF00]
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Post by ~Sapphire~ on Mar 3, 2017 17:21:56 GMT -5
I loved the original version :3 I'm so glad you're bringing it back!
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Post by » ѕнαdσω ⚔️ on Mar 4, 2017 23:23:37 GMT -5
Sometime soon, owl. Just want to get some things straightened out first. ^^' ~Sapphire~ - Thanks saph! :'3 |
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Post by Mᴏᴏɴ - - on Mar 5, 2017 7:46:34 GMT -5
Ooh, I'm really excited for this! <3
I'd love to add in some of my ideas, but my mind is drawing a blank right now. X'D Maybe some emotional signs and quirks relating to anger/annoyance in itself?
Also, if I may add, a male Ira sounds really cool.
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Post by » ѕнαdσω ⚔️ on Mar 5, 2017 18:53:50 GMT -5
Mᴏᴏɴ - - - Yay! I'm glad. :'3 Anything helps! At the moment I'm just trying to wrap up some Curse stuff so I can work on DSOTM. Good. I'm thinking it will turn out for the better.
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Post by Mᴏᴏɴ - - on Mar 5, 2017 19:29:24 GMT -5
I've seen this post on tumblr talking about "Dry Anger vs Wet Anger". "Wet anger" is that anger you feel when you're frustrated, embarrassed, or overwhelmed. When your face grows red, and you're about to cry. Whereas "dry anger" is that serious, stern kind of anger... The anger you have when you're telling someone off in a sharp and dead serious tone.
Some signs of anger/irritation:
- Lashing/fast tapping of the tail
- "Annoyed"/Sarcastic laughter
- Twitching eyebrow, eye, or tail
- Destroying/vandalizing things such as ripping moss from trees, tearing up soil, viciously clawing trees, ect.
- Shaking/Trembling, as if one is about to explode.
- Flexing claws ( akin to balling up fists )
- Grinding/Baring of teeth
- Glaring
- Higher blood pressure & adrenaline levels
- Loud huffing, panting, or erratic breathing
- Speaking low or with a growl in the throat
- Making oneself appear to be more intimidating than their stimulus.
- Interrupting others when they speak; poor listening skills; impulsiveness
- Ear(s) twitching
- Cold, dark eyes
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Post by » ѕнαdσω ⚔️ on Mar 6, 2017 13:46:57 GMT -5
Ooooh, thank you Moon! That's very helpful. :'O
I feel like Spotted will have more dry anger than wet. Her emotions are pretty tightly controlled unless she is thrown into a situation (like the between world) where some of her deeper emotions (fear, uncertainty, sadness) might come through.
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