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Post by ƤαƖƖαѕ ✧ on Dec 9, 2016 11:35:30 GMT -5
Elowen knew that everything was back to square one with these Romans now. They'd started giving her more freedom, and she had to blow it by trying to escape too early. It would take a lot more time to get any more trust from them again.
She tried to convince herself, as she sat that night, the eyes of three soldiers constantly trained on her, that she didn't care. They thought of her as less than human, but she didn't care. She knew who she was and that was all that mattered.
Didn't she know who she was? Did she identify as anything more than a Celt? She couldn't call herself a warrior or a leader, so what could she call herself? Could she say she was anything at all?
These Romans could. They were part of a team where she had not been. They were travellers where she had not been. Each had his own unique skills, where Elowen seemed to know little more than how to survive well amongst nature and how to use nature to one's advantage.
Maybe, she thought, they thought of her as non - human not just because of her heritage, but because she had been so swept up in trying to fulfil her father's wild fancies that she had never endeavoured to make herself unique.
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Post by 𝘨𝘰𝘭𝘥𝘦𝘯 𝘴𝘶𝘯 on Dec 9, 2016 15:36:27 GMT -5
Cassius, and the rest of the legion who'd spent the night awake, were granted sleep until noon. It was no less sleep than they got usually, but when they got up, Cassius still felt like he needed a few more hours. He'd been up all night, it shouldn't come as a surprise.
Sadly, he got no more sleep. The legion was getting ready to move again. The men who'd slept through the night had cleared the camp while the others caught up, so all that was left was the remaining tents, which were brought down in a matter of minutes. They'd been constructed for easy pitching, after all.
And then they were marching towards the wall. They'd make it by early afternoon, at this rate, and Cassius thought it couldn't come fast enough. He wanted to sleep in a proper tent for the first time in a while, and he wanted to sit down in an actual forum with the others. They'd spent too long on the road.
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Post by ƤαƖƖαѕ ✧ on Dec 9, 2016 15:46:12 GMT -5
(Lol Elowen is gettin so deep right now)
Elowen did not regret trying to escape, because she felt it had not been entirely pointless. She might have escaped if she'd been just a little bit faster, after all. But she did regret that she had now made things more difficult than ever for herself. These men looked at her with distrust now, and some with open hostility, where before they had looked at her with the kind of bemused look a child might have when looking at a tame animal.
But she tried to hold her head high, and pretend she didn't care, when in reality the atmosphere of hostility that hung around her as she walked weighed upon her very heavily.
Her only comfort was the ring on her finger. It reminded her of her father, and sometimes she ran another finger over the smooth metal to calm herself when she was feeling particularly alone. Her father had expected perhaps too much of her, but he had been her only family. He might have overestimated her, but at least he took her seriously. Nobody else in her life ever had
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Post by 𝘨𝘰𝘭𝘥𝘦𝘯 𝘴𝘶𝘯 on Dec 9, 2016 16:22:37 GMT -5
( haha, yeah, she is. it's always amusing to write deep thoughts from a character's point of view, especially if they're really different from you in the mental regard. )
As expected, they arrived at the Wall within a few hours' march. The camp was full of movement and noise as men moved to and from the Wall. Compared to the temporary one the legion had set up previously, this one was impeccably organised, not to mention massive. There were enough tents to house upwards of ten-thousand men, as well as several, much larger one, all pushed to one side. A forum had been set up closer to the centre of the whole thing.
Cassius sighed as they walked in, already feeling more comfortable than he had in a long time. This was as close to Roma he'd been since the legion left Gaul, and that was long ago now. It felt familiar, the bustle and hustle. He'd like it here, he was certain.
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Post by ƤαƖƖαѕ ✧ on Dec 9, 2016 16:33:50 GMT -5
Elowen was a little overwhelmed by the noise and size of the camp, which was like nothing the Celtic woman had ever encountered before. It was so loud, so dense, and so crowded she felt almost unable to breathe.
She swallowed her momentary panic as she was led to the area of the camp that Cassius' century would be occupying. As before, there was no sign of a tent for her, but she suspected that if it rained they'd probably think about putting one up. They probably wouldn't, though. They hated her enough. They'd probably let her get drenched if it rained.
The lack of tent, she realised, was probably some kind of little punishment for her for her escape attempt, so once again she took a deep breath and tried not to care. She wouldn't need to sleep for a little while yet anyway, so she busied herself with helping to set up things like the fire she would probably be grateful for later
(I'm thinking some sort of fight with the Picts and the Romans perhaps sort of make Elowen fight for them? Right now they kind of have no idea why they have her prisoner anyway so they probably figure they can get some use out of her anyway)
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Post by 𝘨𝘰𝘭𝘥𝘦𝘯 𝘴𝘶𝘯 on Dec 9, 2016 19:56:15 GMT -5
( what do you mean? sorry, it's late so I'm a bit slow at the moment. )
Cassius found the tent set aside for his cohort, surrounded by the tents that would be occupied by the other cohorts in his century. Despite his pleasure at being surrounded by people again, he couldn't help but feel relieved that the Roman army was built up in the way that it was. No matter where he went, he knew the people he was working closest with.
He stopped by to shed the heavy armour he'd been wearing for the last few hours. His legion would spend the day settling in, so he wouldn't need it anyway. He sighed, leaving it where it would stay dry, and then headed back outside. He had not expected Elowen to be so close by.
It was all he could do to hold back a shriek, startled as he was. He took a moment to gather himself, then said, coolly, "You kept me up again. Is this your plan for toppling the Roman army single-handedly? Running us into the ground one by one by exhausting us?" Had his tone been a little lighter it would have been a joke, but he was tired or grumpy. He clearly wasn't joking this time.
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Post by ƤαƖƖαѕ ✧ on Dec 9, 2016 20:15:42 GMT -5
"Firstly, it technically wasn't my fault you were kept up the first time," Elowen began 'And no, I don't have a plan to topple the Roman army. I just appreciate freedom and don't appreciate having no knowledge of my fate, never mind control over it. You're giving up a couple of night's sleep, I'm giving up freedom, my home, and everything I believe in. Think about that"
She didn't really have much more to add to that, but she was getting frustrated by the general thoughtlessness of the Romans for anyone else. They had a total lack of empathy that baffled her, and she couldn't explain it.
(Well, I thought, maybe the Romans have a battle with the Picts and sort of force Elowen to fight with them. Maybe they can't spare anyone in the camp or just want to generally torture her by making her fight on their side)
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Post by 𝘨𝘰𝘭𝘥𝘦𝘯 𝘴𝘶𝘯 on Dec 9, 2016 20:32:19 GMT -5
( ahhh, alright, yeah, that sounds good to me! )
"I have thought about it," Cassius said simply, finally letting the tent fall closed behind him. "But see, I too have left my home, my culture and my freedom, if in different ways to you, so it doesn't mean much to me." There was a difference, he saw that. He had chosen this life, a life where he had little say in anything. A life where he might never see his home again. Elowen had not. But for her to suggest that he had no idea what leaving home knowing you might never go back felt like was almost hurtful.
"What we have here," Cassius said, gesturing to the camp around them, clearly not going to let this go. "It's nothing but a pale imitation of the life I could have had at home, had I not left. My father is a powerful man, you know. If I'd worked with him, I'd be sharing meals with the Emperor regularly. I'd be rich, there'd be feasts nightly, I would be able to celebrate a culture that I am proud of - no matter what you say of it. But I made a decision, and I left that behind to fight. I'm as likely to see home and family again as you are, you realise that? Think before you accuse me of whining, because the way I see it, you're the only one complaining while I have spent years not questioning this even once."
Alright, so it was more than almost hurtful. And Cassius was clearly more than a little upset. Maybe it was the lack of sleep (it was probably the lack of sleep) but he wasn't just asking curious questions anymore. Nor was he trying to mask his distaste and anger behind softer words and light tones. Elowen had struck a nerve, and Cassius was responding the only way Romans knew how - with rage.
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Post by ƤαƖƖαѕ ✧ on Dec 9, 2016 20:41:56 GMT -5
Elowen sighed "You chose to do that. I didn't say you hadn't done all of those things, but my this is different. I didn't. And on the battlefield, your fate is in your own hands, not anyone else's, bar maybe whatever gods there may be. You know all of the things that could happen, including the worst of them. You know when you're about to enter danger. I have no idea what you plan to do with me, however undignified and insulting to my culture it might be. I might live out the rest of my life as some exotic slave for all you or I know, and that is infinitely worse. Maybe I am whining, and if I am I'm sorry, but I live the life of a warrior too. This is not the same and we both know it. At the end of your career you get a cushy retirement and a piece of land. God knows what I get, but I bet you anything it won't be good. I don't care what you say about your culture, anything that happens to me from here on in is not going to be good."
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Post by 𝘨𝘰𝘭𝘥𝘦𝘯 𝘴𝘶𝘯 on Dec 9, 2016 21:03:41 GMT -5
"I did choose to do this," Cassius agreed. "But the result is the same. I will live a better life than you, that's true. You were taken by force, and you're being kept here against your will. I can't say that's a great deal for you, and your future is up in the air right now. But you knew what you were getting into when you went out on that battlefield. There are consequences to every war. You're living them, and just like it is my fault that I find myself here, responsibility lies with you for your fate here, too. Just one choice from you, and this would all be avoided."
Strangely enough, Cassius seemed to be calming down as he spoke. The act of debating was surprisingly soothing. It was a way to vent, and getting a free pass to insult people didn't hurt either. The longer he talked, the calmer his tone became, until he was speaking on a conversational level, talking casually again. Maybe he had needed to shout at someone after all.
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Post by ƤαƖƖαѕ ✧ on Dec 9, 2016 21:13:13 GMT -5
Elowen shrugged, feeding the dying fire another log. Just a small one, because she had no idea how long they wanted to keep the flame burning for and she didn't want to mess up whatever they were doing.
"I don't know." Elowen replied "I think I'm just frustrated because I wanted to prove to people that I was more than my father's overestimating. That maybe I could find a way to exceed expectations in some other ways. I'll never get that chance now, probably. I just didn't want to be summed up by my failures, you know? I'm here because I failed not just once but twice. It's stupid that I'm even telling you this, because all of this probably doesn't make sense, but whatever. I've stopped caring what I say"
It was true. She no longer cared who she was speaking to or what she was saying, just that she was getting a chance to show her humanity to these people. She had wanted to do things, before she was taken. Things she now couldn't do.
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Post by 𝘨𝘰𝘭𝘥𝘦𝘯 𝘴𝘶𝘯 on Dec 10, 2016 12:13:24 GMT -5
( Cassius loves to bicker, haha. it's great, because same. )
"You'll get chances," Casssius disagreed. "Not in battle, and not in any roles of leadership, but you'll get chances. If our orders were to keep them from you, you'd be dead by this point." This was true, he was sure of it. The Roman Empire wasn't fair when it came to offering chances - the rich and powerful got theirs and the rest were left with nohing but crumbs. But the only people that never got a chance to prove something were those the Romans had killed. Anyone being kept alive would get one eventually, even if it gained nobody but the Romans themselves anything.
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Post by ƤαƖƖαѕ ✧ on Dec 10, 2016 12:30:06 GMT -5
(Haha great, I love him!)
Elowen had been about to reply when calls sounded up around camp about an attack by the Picts. They were attacking a camp.
A soldier ran up, thrusting a sword into Elowen's hand "You're going to make yourself useful and fight this battle with us. And don't think about turning that sword on any of us, because you'll be dead before you can finish the swing"
Elowen went white, feeling sick about fighting not only for people she hated, but against people that were essentially her own people. She swallowed, her throat moving nervously. It went against everything she had ever believed in, every moral she knew.
"I can't..." she murmured
"Well, you're going to. You've caused enough trouble already. Don't make yourself more trouble than you're worth."
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Post by 𝘨𝘰𝘭𝘥𝘦𝘯 𝘴𝘶𝘯 on Dec 10, 2016 12:42:18 GMT -5
( he's wonderful, honestly. I love using him just because of the constant bickering he gets into. so amusing. )
Cassius shrugged apologetically. "Guess you get to fight again. Don't get captured again," he said, knowing fully well that the army would never let that happen. They'd gone to so much trouble.
He also knew that this was a punishment for the attempted escape. They couldn't kill her, and it seemed there were to keep from harming her physically in any way, so there was no punishment to be given in the form of lashes. This was the next best thing. Cassius could see in the look on her face that she'd have prefered the lashes.
He gave an apologetic smile and disappeared into his tent, reamergin a short while later wearing hardened leather and forged metal. "I'll join you." He'd been looking forward to defending a camp for so long, there was no way he was passing his up. He shot the man a look, searching for permission, and he found it quickly. The mass of men he knew now wearing armour told him that his legionaire had given the order, anyway.
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Post by ƤαƖƖαѕ ✧ on Dec 10, 2016 13:01:58 GMT -5
Elowen remained white, her blue eyes having went dull. She felt on the verge of frustrated tears, and she was already sending out mental apologies to those she would probably be forced to kill in whatever was coming. She felt like she was betraying her people.
If they'd punished her any other way she'd have been happier. This wasn't punishment,this was torture. This was making sure she could never return home again. Her people would never trust her again. She'd be an outcast forever,
It was at this moment she saw the Pict warriors approaching. She prayed a collective prayer to every god from every Pantheon she knew of yo stop this from happening, to make her not have to do this. Just to stop all of this
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Post by 𝘨𝘰𝘭𝘥𝘦𝘯 𝘴𝘶𝘯 on Dec 10, 2016 15:29:39 GMT -5
The Picts were strong and resilient, more so than any Britanian force the Roman's had encountered. They'd warranted building a wall, and if that didn't attest to it Cassius didn't know what did. Things had been relatively peaceful with them for a while, but the recently started construction of Antonine's Wall had provoked them. This had been the reason for Cassius's legion to leave Gaul in the first place.
The Roman army fell into formation easily. Even with new men, everyone knew their place and found it in moments. Cassius pulled Elowen to stand beside him, figuring that she would have no idea what she was doing. "Our army will keep you from getting captured, but likely won't keep you from dying. If you're killed in a Pictish raid, the blame - and you - is off their back. You'll have to fight unless you wish to die today."
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Post by ƤαƖƖαѕ ✧ on Dec 10, 2016 15:38:26 GMT -5
Elowen took a deep breath and nodded, drawing her weapon. It wasn't like she would have a chance to see her people again anyway, as an outsider or not.
But even as she began sparring with a furious Pict, who was shouting all kinds of abuse at her in Celtic for fighting on the Roman side, she couldn't get herself to not care about this. This would be the thing that would break her, and these Romans knew it. They couldn't break her spirit any other way than forcing her to kill her own people, people she should be trying to help.
She focused all of her emotional turmoil into the fight, though, and sunk down just a little, lowering her centre of gravity to make herself more steady.
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Post by 𝘨𝘰𝘭𝘥𝘦𝘯 𝘴𝘶𝘯 on Dec 10, 2016 16:10:23 GMT -5
Cassius fought beside her, exchanging slashes and parries easily. He clearly knew what he was doing with his sword, but it was more than that. He found this enjoyable. It wasn't the slaughter he enjoyed, not the feeling he got every time a Celt fell at his sword. No, that was more a satisfaction that he'd won a fight from his empire's sake. He enjoyed the dance of it, the way his movements turned from long, smooth movements to short slashes in moments. The unpredictability of each fight was enough for him to smile to himself as he pushed forward.
A Pict stepped towards him and the two soon found themselves sparring, each easily avoiding the other's blows. He was skilled, Cassius gave him that, but he had formation on his side. Even in battle, the Roman army was organised enough for it to give him the upper hand. He had them to fall back against, the Pict had no-one to back him. He would tire quicker without the support.
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Post by ƤαƖƖαѕ ✧ on Dec 10, 2016 16:18:14 GMT -5
There were more Picts coming now to support each other, but it seemed even here that the Romans had the advantage.
A surprise jab from Elowen's opponent would have skewered the woman if she hadn't dodged out of the way. She hadn't defended against that strike properly, but she responded to her opponent's attack with one of her own.
She swallowed guiltily as her attack hit her opponent, who went down. That felt more like a betrayal than anything she had done before that point, and it felt like a physical pain in her chest. This was the worst feeling she had ever had. She had never felt so alone or so guilty in her life.
She would pray for the forgiveness of her gods and of her people. It would take a lot of praying to wash herself clean of thus betrayal.
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Post by 𝘨𝘰𝘭𝘥𝘦𝘯 𝘴𝘶𝘯 on Dec 10, 2016 16:44:17 GMT -5
As predicted, the man tired first. But by that point, he had someone else backing him. With every soldier in the near vicinity occupied, Cassius found himself with one blade against two. He'd trained for this, but the battle had gone on for a while, and he was tiring too. He held up against them for a while, doing admirably. He ended up bringing out a second blade, a dagger much shorter than his sword, but it was intended for closer combat so it did little good.
He held his own for a while, but eventually a blade found his side. His armour did its job and prevented death or anything resembling it, but not well enough to keep him from injury. A sharp pain radiated from his side, and he knew that he was losing this fight. He continued forward, favouring his right in an attempt to keep blood loss at a minimum. The moment things went foggy, he'd be done for, so he had to put it off until he could retreat into formation again.
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Post by ƤαƖƖαѕ ✧ on Dec 10, 2016 16:50:21 GMT -5
None of the Picts were engaging with Elowen at that point, and so she needed only a moment to deliberate before she let out a yell, catching the attention of the two soldiers. Only one went to approach Elowen, but all she needed to stop Cassius from risking death was to distract one of them.
Elowen felt a little bit better about fighting this Pict because she knew that she was actually helping Cassius when she was doing it. She didn't care about him, and he was a Roman, but Elowen couldn't stand by and watch someone who was injured risk death when she knew she could help. She was better than that. Much better.
At least, then, she could perhaps feel a little less bad about what she had done. It wasn't like she'd had a choice, after all, but she now knew she had been doing some good anyway. That was what was important for her.
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Post by 𝘨𝘰𝘭𝘥𝘦𝘯 𝘴𝘶𝘯 on Dec 10, 2016 17:07:50 GMT -5
Oh thank the gods. Though he'd never say it, Cassius wasn't sure if he could have faought them both off while he could feel blood leaving him at a frankly alarming rate. But he could fight the one.
So he did. The man was tired, and despite his injury, Cassius overpowered him. Out of desperation, mostly, he knew he only had so much time before he lost the ability to fight back. Luckily, it didn't take long for his to land a blow against the other. It wasn't a fatal one, but it was enough. A single slash to his dominant shoulder caused him to drop his weapon. Not having trained both, as Cassius knew Celts often failed to do, the Pict found himself at a clear disadvantage. He backed away, and Cassius did the same.
The moment he found himself surrounded by his own army again, he clutched his side, wincing. Three men, noting his bloodstained armour, surrounded him and together they backed through the skirmish until they were safely away. They helped him down, and then two of them returned to keep fighting, leaving Cassius and the final soldier - who Cassius now saw was hurt himself - behind.
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Post by ƤαƖƖαѕ ✧ on Dec 10, 2016 17:18:47 GMT -5
This Pict, it seemed, was particularly skilled at nasty injuries, for Elowen found herself with a wound in her abdomen. Not too much, she could, do fight on, and to be quite frank she didn't want to admit weakness while she could still battle on.
By the end of the battle, though, Elowen was feeling a little lightheaded, and a soldier did notice her wound and sit her down. All it needed was a dressing of some description to keep the wound sealed, and sure enough the woman was brought some water to clean out the wound and a bandage (I think their equivalent would just be a piece of generally clean cloth but whatevs). She was expected to deal with her own wound, and would not get any further medical attention.
So the woman set away on her wound, cleaning it out, unable to look any Roman in the eye after that battle. She couldn't believe what they'd made her do.
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Post by 𝘨𝘰𝘭𝘥𝘦𝘯 𝘴𝘶𝘯 on Dec 10, 2016 17:30:46 GMT -5
All the wounded men had gathered closest to where the fire would soon be. The Romans were ruthless, but they cared for and respected their wounded. A man with sufficient medical knowledge made his way around, checking wounds and advising those who were inexperienced in binding them. But most everyone had worked on his wounds more times than he cared to count, so they knew what they were doing.
As soon as the bleeding had been contained, some of the weakness left Cassius. Enough for his to rise - he'd be able to get his seat back easily tonight - and track down Elowen. He owed her thanks, he wasn't sure what condition he'd be in now if he'd had to continue fighting.
He spotted her quickly thanks to her hair, and made his way over, leaning to the right and holding onto anything he could for support. He flopped down next to her, hissing as the shock reached his abdomen. "Thanks," he said quietly, noting that she was tending to a wound of her own.
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Post by ƤαƖƖαѕ ✧ on Dec 10, 2016 17:36:14 GMT -5
Elowen looked up from her work to see Cassius sitting beside her, thanking her for helping him earlier.
"Don't mention it," She replied "I might not be a Roman, but I'm not a bad person. I wouldn't ignore someone who needed help, even if they are an enemy."
She finished wrapping the bandage around the - mercifully not too messy - wound, letting the material of her clothes cover her abdomen again.
"I take it your wound is better now? You are no longer losing a lot of blood?"
This was more an observation than a question, seeing as the man had been able to make it over to her without too much trouble.
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Post by 𝘨𝘰𝘭𝘥𝘦𝘯 𝘴𝘶𝘯 on Dec 10, 2016 17:48:42 GMT -5
Cassius nodded, lifting the hem of his shirt to show the bindings wrapped tightly around his abdomen. "It's containing the bleeding, yes." He sighed, slouching down as much as he could around the tight warppings. He blinked, slowly, groggy from the bloodloss, in an attempt to jump-start himself.
"I'm sorry they made you fight today," he said after a long pause. "It's a worse torture than the lashes would be." He understood this, certainly. He could imagine what fighting against his own people would feel like, and he knew that for Elowen it would probably be a lot worse. Celts prided themselves on the people while Roman pride lay with the Empire, that difference was what would make it difficult on her.
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Post by ƤαƖƖαѕ ✧ on Dec 10, 2016 17:54:57 GMT -5
Elowen nodded in agreement "I would have chosen lashes over this any day. But I guess I understand it. They've made sure I can't face my people again, which makes me extremely unlikely to escape again. To be entirely honest, I'm not sure if I can even face myself after this."
She felt so lost and so alone. She could not face her people again and the Romans would need accept her, not that she would be so fickle with her allegiances. But she had nobody who she could say would accept her or care about her.
The Romans had, she had to admit, picked a very good punishment.
(I got to sleep but I'll reply in the morning)
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Post by 𝘨𝘰𝘭𝘥𝘦𝘯 𝘴𝘶𝘯 on Dec 10, 2016 18:22:15 GMT -5
( sleep well! )
"Forgiving yourself is a difficult task," Cassius agreed. "It was kill or be killed today, and this time you didn't choose it. I know that probably doesn't help, but it wasn't your fault." He wasn't sure why he was attempting to comfort her. Perhaps it was repayment for the save, or maybe he just felt that she needed it. She'd alienated the only people on her side today under the threat of impending death. She deserved the slack.
"Dinner will be called soon," he said, leaning back. "They'll bring those of us who were hurt food, but I'm not sure what they'll do for you," he warned. He wouldn't be surprised if they cut her rations in response to last night's occurrences, as well as what they'd already done. It was a classic disciplinary tool, one that was used on Roman soldiers who couldn't be directly harmed just in case they found themselves fighting again. Open wounds were not an advantage in those situations, and Romans didn't give those away lightly.
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Post by ƤαƖƖαѕ ✧ on Dec 11, 2016 2:22:11 GMT -5
Elowen nodded, turning the ring absently around her finger in an attempt to calm herself down and relax. She couldn't waste the energy she wasn't getting from the food in stress and worry.
"Thank you for trying to comfort me, but I think it's going to take some time for me to be able to forgive myself" she replied
She looked up as soldiers began serving up bowls of food to each injured soldier. She was relieved to find that there was a bowl for her. But when she was given it she was unsurprised to see that they had indeed cut down her rations. She didn't say anything, but they had cut it down enough that she could tell straightaway that it wasn't her normal serving
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Post by 𝘨𝘰𝘭𝘥𝘦𝘯 𝘴𝘶𝘯 on Dec 11, 2016 9:07:51 GMT -5
Cassius nodded. He could understand that, of course he could. It was a lot for one person to take, no matter how much other people tried to help.
A bowl was placed in his hands and he nodded gratefully. As expected, Elowen had received less food than the day before, significantly so. Cassius frowned, knowing that on servings like this it was unlikely for her to heal as quickly as she could. When she'd taken a blade for the Empire, that seemed ungrateful, but he made no comment. It wasn't his place to bring these things into question.
The man left and Cassius started eating, as slowly as he could to keep movements as restricted as possible. He kept looking between his food and Elowen's, frowning, but made no move to say anything.
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