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Post by Saint Ambrosef on Nov 27, 2024 10:13:34 GMT -5
thread title is a joke. see actual question.
this was inspired by a tumblr poll that's been going around. i'm always curious to see how the demographics here answer differently.
no, online groups do not count for the purposes of this poll. not that they arent valid and good ways to socialize, but the poll is about gauging in-person activity specifically.
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Post by Pixie on Nov 27, 2024 10:37:22 GMT -5
Friends, school, volunteering, and church events are often where I socialize.
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Post by tumblepaw on Nov 27, 2024 11:37:06 GMT -5
Social anxiety disorder has been bad, and I struggle to open up and trust others offline. Sometimes I talk with people at the dog park, but we’re not close or anything. I talk with my family fairly often, and right now I’m avoiding my coworkers because of what they said about my disability.
It’s easier for me to reach out to others online because I don’t feel the same anxiety most of the time when I post.
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Agender
#000000
Name Colour
Leapkit
Finder of Rare Friend Error
Derealizing for the forseeable future
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Post by Leapkit on Nov 27, 2024 12:03:53 GMT -5
poll made me realize i need to touch grass.
i don't exactly leave the house for anything but groceries, laundry, eating with dakotas fam on the weekends, and maybe a walk at 3 am by myself. I know i should change that but in some ways I don't really want to. It'd be easier if people I was already friends with were closer by or just had schedules that aligned more than twice a year.
I've thought about doing stuff at the library or like idk just going anywhere but I don't really feel the need. Even though i don't exactly go outside I still socialize pretty regularly online. I also like my community where I live now and the apartment complex has started holding like, community meet parties and food but because most of them speak spanish theres a communication barrier. I went to one and it was extremely awkward because most of them just assumed I also spoke spanish and i was just like "english sorry" and left after about 10 minutes out of embarassment.
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Post by Tealraven on Nov 27, 2024 13:13:34 GMT -5
None, though not for lack of trying. I’ve even attempted to start some of these groups. Idk if it’s just the demographics of where I live (rural retirement town) or an overall shift in society but it seems to be a lot harder to get people to engage than when I was younger. Every group I’ve been in eventually falls apart and once I stop putting effort into increasingly one-sided conversations people just drop out of my life. At some point it becomes exhausting to even try to get involved in anything. It’s like,,, the adult version of being the only person to do all the work in a group project for school lol
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Post by Saint Ambrosef on Nov 27, 2024 13:17:10 GMT -5
None, though not for lack of trying. I’ve even attempted to start some of these groups. Idk if it’s just the demographics of where I live (rural retirement town) or an overall shift in society but it seems to be a lot harder to get people to engage than when I was younger. Every group I’ve been in eventually falls apart and once I stop putting effort into increasingly one-sided conversations people just drop out of my life. At some point it becomes exhausting to even try to get involved in anything. It’s like,,, the adult version of being the only person to do all the work in a group project for school lol i do think people have gotten flakier over time. |
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Post by Brownie on Nov 27, 2024 16:07:50 GMT -5
mostly library events tbh. I'm part of a library writing circle and book club that meet monthly. That's my "meeting new people on a somewhat regular basis" need
my high school friends still do board game/movie nights at least once a month, sometimes more than that. I don't always attend as much as I probably should, but there's. Drama there. And it takes a lot out of me to go sometimes.
in the winters, I try to go rock climbing which has a big community around it. I'm pretty bad at it tho so I don't really hang out with the "career climbers" just the bunches of noobs. It's downtown so a very multi-lingual place and I get to practice other languages there which is fun!
in summer, I like to play pokemon go with some people and walk about the parks. There's a particular park nearby where everyone is friendly and it's easy to just walk up to people and talk, unlike some of the other parks that are earbud in, politely ignore people parks. I like the vibe of it and it's nice to be able to walk around and get/give compliments or just have some passing conversation with strangers. Feels like it's hard to do that most places nowadays.
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Bisexual
asrise
pfp by a good friend who wishes to remain unnamed!
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Post by asrise on Nov 27, 2024 16:10:48 GMT -5
Rock Climbing and Hiking, Writing Club, Church (Weekly services and university club), Activism (a bit more occasional, I often do more when there is a big issue I can change), Art Club and Model UN (in person hobbies) and I have a regular friend group that hangs out outside of university.
University definitely gives me a lot of stuff to do so that may be part of it. (though there are also people who don't take advantage of all the connections that can be made) So, I'd say I have a life in-person.
I was definitely worse off in high school, too. Maybe it was because of the pandemic, or maybe it was that I was antisocial, though likely a mix of the two. I had to make a big effort this year when I started Uni to actually meet people and do stuff. Living on residence is another thing that helped a lot as well, because I pretty much have 100 or so people to socialize with 24/7.
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Post by ! (Ġray) ! on Nov 30, 2024 20:03:40 GMT -5
i do horse riding and i hang out w people a lot
I'm also about to start volunteering at a vet surgery!! (already have confirmation I can do it, just need to set up insurance)
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Aroace
#b6efff
Name Colour
Dɾҽαɱƈʅσυԃ
Villain Enjoyer
Arcane Season 2 has got me in a chokehold once again (do not send help)
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Post by Dɾҽαɱƈʅσυԃ on Dec 1, 2024 14:24:28 GMT -5
Working on it for next year.
Being a shut-in with diagnosed depression and social anxiety disorder for years has made things difficult for me but I was involved in a project for youths trying to find apprenticeships or jobs this year and did come out of my shell for a bit during April/May/June. Sadly had a bit of a relapse after my cat died in September and job prospects did not work out the way I had hoped so now its back to the drawing board of trying to get my shit together. Or "touch grass" as the title of this thread says (I know it's a joke but still fits lol).
Had a job for a callcenter lined up this month, went to two interviews for that position and did see the opportunity there in terms of interacting/forming connections with peers my age (or older/younger) due to them also offering group activities outside of work but decided against it due to numerous reasons.
I was thinking (and also encouraged/recommended) to join a choir, due to me having singing experience for almost 10 years as a child/teen, but have not found the courage to actually go for it.
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#f0a9e4
Name Colour
Captain Americat
"Don't frown, someone could be falling in love with your smile." - Teen Wolf
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Post by Captain Americat on Dec 3, 2024 13:41:49 GMT -5
I run & do historical reenacting. I touch lots of grass, haha. One time when we were setting up our tents, I just laid on the grass and my people were like “you’re one with the grass” xD
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Post by *Ɗαɾƙρσσℓ* on Dec 3, 2024 13:53:47 GMT -5
I mean...I do a lot of these as solitary hobbies but I don't really have communities for them outside of a fiber arts group. I think that's still kinda 'touching grass' tho.
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Post by Saint Ambrosef on Dec 3, 2024 14:19:41 GMT -5
I mean...I do a lot of these as solitary hobbies but I don't really have communities for them outside of a fiber arts group. I think that's still kinda 'touching grass' tho. the "touching grass" bit is just a tongue-in-cheek joke. the poll is really for gauging how often people here are involved with a regular community experience, rather than determining with how many hobbies one engages. a fiber arts group would definitely count! the distinction being that somewhat regular involvement with a recurring group of people is one of the defining factors of experiencing community, and community is necessary for most people's mental health (always gotta make exceptions for the true hermit wackos). hobbies are valuable with or without social exchange being involved but they also aren't substitutes for a good social environment. |
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Post by Saint Ambrosef on Dec 3, 2024 14:20:14 GMT -5
also, for everyone who is struggling right now to be involved with an outside hobby or social group: i hope 2025 changes that for you. <3
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Genderfluid
lynxexists980
Hi just a neurodivergent WC and WoF fan here!
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Post by lynxexists980 on Dec 3, 2024 14:51:18 GMT -5
I play Roller Derby (well I don't play it yet I'm still in training) and I'm part of the UK scouting organisation (like boy scouts in the US but we allow both genders!) I also take part in a drama group where we learn how to act for films and tv rather than theatre acting
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Post by Saint Ambrosef on Dec 3, 2024 15:22:16 GMT -5
I play Roller Derby (well I don't play it yet I'm still in training) and I'm part of the UK scouting organisation (like boy scouts in the US but we allow both genders!) I also take part in a drama group where we learn how to act for films and tv rather than theatre acting Fun fact for you, Boy Scouts also allows girls to join now. Idk why they don't just call themselves "Scouts" now, it's weird. |
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Genderfluid
lynxexists980
Hi just a neurodivergent WC and WoF fan here!
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Post by lynxexists980 on Dec 3, 2024 15:24:42 GMT -5
Probably bc the uk one is just called Scouts
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Post by Sand on Dec 3, 2024 17:53:07 GMT -5
I do have hobbies like some of the ones listed, but I’m always with a family member (or multiple family members). I can’t be alone due to medical reasons 🤷♀️
I’ve one friend who I don’t see too often and when we do see each other, it’s for several hours (if not longer). We love to have a meal together and go exploring or wandering around our town.
I do have other “friends”, but they’re my caretakers so maybe they aren’t considered my friends… maybe acquaintances? I don’t know, but I’m content with how things are even if I don’t have many friends irl, I just prefer things that way for personal reasons.
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Non-binary
#F4B548
Name Colour
Dark Sun
Sage of the Stars
I'm devious, I'm devilish, I'm ever so deliciously evil
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Post by Dark Sun on Dec 3, 2024 18:20:44 GMT -5
I play Roller Derby (well I don't play it yet I'm still in training) and I'm part of the UK scouting organisation (like boy scouts in the US but we allow both genders!) I also take part in a drama group where we learn how to act for films and tv rather than theatre acting Fun fact for you, Boy Scouts also allows girls to join now. Idk why they don't just call themselves "Scouts" now, it's weird. AFAIK Girl Scouts are still hideously underfunded and pretty much exclusively focus on "girly" (their words) activities such as baking/selling cookies. It honestly needs to be reformed, and there are plenty of petitions out there demanding just this.
Edit: Girl Scouts should stay, Boy Scouts should just be renamed to "Mixed Gender Scouts" or "Gender Inclusive Scouts".
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Post by Saint Ambrosef on Dec 3, 2024 18:35:21 GMT -5
Fun fact for you, Boy Scouts also allows girls to join now. Idk why they don't just call themselves "Scouts" now, it's weird. AFAIK Girl Scouts are still hideously underfunded and pretty much exclusively focus on "girly" (their words) activities such as baking/selling cookies. It honestly needs to be reformed, and there are plenty of petitions out there demanding just this. Edit: Girl Scouts should stay, Boy Scouts should just be renamed to "Mixed Gender Scouts" or "Gender Inclusive Scouts".
personally, i am in favor of gender-segregated scout spaces. i think co-ed scouts are good too (like venture crews!), but imo it's important for girls to have social groups that are just for them, and same with boys. but yeah, girl scouts was pretty bad. idk if it was just my particular troop but we never did anything fun. our activities were always just craft projects, and like, i did enjoy crafts as a 10yro but sometimes i also wanted to do things like camping or hiking like my older sister's non-scout group did. its was lame. but also all my fellow troop members were huge wimps so idk, might have been an "us" thing. also the cookie sales are such a racket, they are overpriced and the only kids who win legit prizes beyond the "sticker" level were girls with wealthy parents who could ask all their wealthy friends (or employees, if they owned a business) to buy loads of boxes. |
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Agender
#000000
Name Colour
Leapkit
Finder of Rare Friend Error
Derealizing for the forseeable future
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Post by Leapkit on Dec 3, 2024 20:24:09 GMT -5
Man yalls girl scouts sucked then ours did camping and archery all the time, we also did "girlier" things like pottery or baking but one of those times we got taken to the wonder bread factory and I cannot underline enough how delicious a freshly made STILL WARM twinkie is.
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Post by Saint Ambrosef on Dec 3, 2024 21:44:04 GMT -5
Man yalls girl scouts sucked then ours did camping and archery all the time, we also did "girlier" things like pottery or baking but one of those times we got taken to the wonder bread factory and I cannot underline enough how delicious a freshly made STILL WARM twinkie is. ours did """""camping"""" once. i put it in quotes because we slept in a cabin with mattresses and the troop leaders wouldnt start an actual fire so they brought an electric marshmellow toaster. cue like 12 girls indoors trying to pathetically "roast" marshmellows over what amounted to an easy bake oven. also the place they rented had permanent tents on the property so that was definitely an option. at one point the adults took us out to one at night and were like "okay girls lets turn off all our lights to see what it'd be like if we actually slept out here!" we were like max 70ft from the cabin and several girls were wearing glowsticks. and yet someone still complained about being scared like 10 seconds in. okay maybe it was just my troop that sucked. |
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Agender
#000000
Name Colour
Leapkit
Finder of Rare Friend Error
Derealizing for the forseeable future
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Post by Leapkit on Dec 3, 2024 22:26:11 GMT -5
Man yalls girl scouts sucked then ours did camping and archery all the time, we also did "girlier" things like pottery or baking but one of those times we got taken to the wonder bread factory and I cannot underline enough how delicious a freshly made STILL WARM twinkie is. ours did """""camping"""" once. i put it in quotes because we slept in a cabin with mattresses and the troop leaders wouldnt start an actual fire so they brought an electric marshmellow toaster. cue like 12 girls indoors trying to pathetically "roast" marshmellows over what amounted to an easy bake oven. also the place they rented had permanent tents on the property so that was definitely an option. at one point the adults took us out to one at night and were like "okay girls lets turn off all our lights to see what it'd be like if we actually slept out here!" we were like max 70ft from the cabin and several girls were wearing glowsticks. and yet someone still complained about being scared like 10 seconds in. okay maybe it was just my troop that sucked. Well okay ours also had sort of cabins? They were wooden, but were 3 walls with one wall open with only fly netting over it. We still had to sleep on the hard wood with sleeping bags I think they picked those just to make sure we had shelter if it rained or something? There was also an actual cabin nearby with regular bathrooms and a kitchen but we still made a fire and smores every time except for once because we were having a drought. Except I got excluded from the fire pit and archery after only doing them once because this bitch hillary decided it was a fun and cool idea to lead me out of the woods and then leave me there by myself because she insisted the troop leader said it was fine, only for her to run back and tell the troop leader i ran off so i would be excluded from every camping trip after that incident and no one would believe me i hate you so much hillary i hope you get hit by a bus. |
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Genderfluid
lynxexists980
Hi just a neurodivergent WC and WoF fan here!
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Post by lynxexists980 on Dec 4, 2024 2:20:37 GMT -5
UK girl guides weren't much better I left there as soon as I was old enough for scouts
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Non-binary
#F4B548
Name Colour
Dark Sun
Sage of the Stars
I'm devious, I'm devilish, I'm ever so deliciously evil
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Post by Dark Sun on Dec 4, 2024 5:11:15 GMT -5
AFAIK Girl Scouts are still hideously underfunded and pretty much exclusively focus on "girly" (their words) activities such as baking/selling cookies. It honestly needs to be reformed, and there are plenty of petitions out there demanding just this. Edit: Girl Scouts should stay, Boy Scouts should just be renamed to "Mixed Gender Scouts" or "Gender Inclusive Scouts".
personally, i am in favor of gender-segregated scout spaces. i think co-ed scouts are good too (like venture crews!), but imo it's important for girls to have social groups that are just for them, and same with boys. but yeah, girl scouts was pretty bad. idk if it was just my particular troop but we never did anything fun. our activities were always just craft projects, and like, i did enjoy crafts as a 10yro but sometimes i also wanted to do things like camping or hiking like my older sister's non-scout group did. its was lame. but also all my fellow troop members were huge wimps so idk, might have been an "us" thing. also the cookie sales are such a racket, they are overpriced and the only kids who win legit prizes beyond the "sticker" level were girls with wealthy parents who could ask all their wealthy friends (or employees, if they owned a business) to buy loads of boxes. We'll have to agree to disagree! At the very least, girl-only scouts absolutely need to exist, for safety reasons, for parents not to be breathing down their neck, girls/women with past traumas from cis men, etc., but that's another can of worms. (It's why I support women-only bathrooms alongside gender neutral ones.)
"but also all my fellow troop members were huge wimps so idk, might have been an "us" thing." This could be due to many, many cis boys being raised with the "get your hands dirty in the mud" mentality, along with rougher play, fostering them to be more "adventurous", but this is only a guess.
I don't see girl scouts getting much more funding though since is it not true that attendance for them and "boy scouts" has dropped drastically in recent years/decades?
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Non-binary
#F4B548
Name Colour
Dark Sun
Sage of the Stars
I'm devious, I'm devilish, I'm ever so deliciously evil
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Post by Dark Sun on Dec 4, 2024 5:15:40 GMT -5
ours did """""camping"""" once. i put it in quotes because we slept in a cabin with mattresses and the troop leaders wouldnt start an actual fire so they brought an electric marshmellow toaster. cue like 12 girls indoors trying to pathetically "roast" marshmellows over what amounted to an easy bake oven. also the place they rented had permanent tents on the property so that was definitely an option. at one point the adults took us out to one at night and were like "okay girls lets turn off all our lights to see what it'd be like if we actually slept out here!" we were like max 70ft from the cabin and several girls were wearing glowsticks. and yet someone still complained about being scared like 10 seconds in. okay maybe it was just my troop that sucked. Well okay ours also had sort of cabins? They were wooden, but were 3 walls with one wall open with only fly netting over it. We still had to sleep on the hard wood with sleeping bags I think they picked those just to make sure we had shelter if it rained or something? There was also an actual cabin nearby with regular bathrooms and a kitchen but we still made a fire and smores every time except for once because we were having a drought. Except I got excluded from the fire pit and archery after only doing them once because this bitch hillary decided it was a fun and cool idea to lead me out of the woods and then leave me there by myself because she insisted the troop leader said it was fine, only for her to run back and tell the troop leader i ran off so i would be excluded from every camping trip after that incident and no one would believe me i hate you so much hillary i hope you get hit by a bus. Asshat.
Come to think of it, the final summer camp I went to did have a mix of boys/girls (no gender-nonconforming/other/etc. people AFAIK), although of course we had separate cabins adjacent to each other, separate bathrooms, so forth. Although the one time when we climbed a mountain, they allowed all of us to sleep in one big huddle which, come to think of it, was a bit weird. I personally slept far away from everyone else, but only because I'd undoubtedly kick a few of them in their sleep by accident. |
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