Post by hiraeth on Jan 15, 2023 18:51:18 GMT -5
And maybe I’m just a placeholder after all.
Remember when you’d get off the school bus in October and caramel colored leaves would crunch under your shoes? The sound so satisfying you’d step on every dry leaf just to hear it again? Remember how you’d walk towards your front door and you stop for a couple of moments feeling the breeze remembering that, the familiar yet fresh feeling that first semester brings doesn’t last forever?
The same way the sun wouldn’t always shine on those yellow soaked tree appendages, and the wind wont always be this kind.
In some ways I think I’ve loved fall for that very reason. I was fleeting like she was. A time to be alive, the joy in the moment. Until everyone moved onto what they really needed. Family, the holidays, the stuff people actually cared about. There i was stuck in a nostalgic loop of the last week of October wishing i could go back to the first.
At the end of the day everyone fantasizes about fall, romance tales are written about her, songs and poems. She’s your ideal woman. Soft in nature, and kind prepping you for the cold. She’s in that first bowl of soup when next weeks first scene of terror is 45 degrees.
I comfort people apparently. They feel safe enough to tell me anything about their lives and I give them food and a place to rest.
They stay until they find interest in other seasons. But I end up stuck with a bed to make and dishes to wash. At the end of it all I’m left living in the wind behind me, an echoing sentiment, a state of retrograde. And just like fall in October I’m chasing the taunting leaves, wanting to stay, but too fleeting to remember.
Remember when you’d get off the school bus in October and caramel colored leaves would crunch under your shoes? The sound so satisfying you’d step on every dry leaf just to hear it again? Remember how you’d walk towards your front door and you stop for a couple of moments feeling the breeze remembering that, the familiar yet fresh feeling that first semester brings doesn’t last forever?
The same way the sun wouldn’t always shine on those yellow soaked tree appendages, and the wind wont always be this kind.
In some ways I think I’ve loved fall for that very reason. I was fleeting like she was. A time to be alive, the joy in the moment. Until everyone moved onto what they really needed. Family, the holidays, the stuff people actually cared about. There i was stuck in a nostalgic loop of the last week of October wishing i could go back to the first.
At the end of the day everyone fantasizes about fall, romance tales are written about her, songs and poems. She’s your ideal woman. Soft in nature, and kind prepping you for the cold. She’s in that first bowl of soup when next weeks first scene of terror is 45 degrees.
I comfort people apparently. They feel safe enough to tell me anything about their lives and I give them food and a place to rest.
They stay until they find interest in other seasons. But I end up stuck with a bed to make and dishes to wash. At the end of it all I’m left living in the wind behind me, an echoing sentiment, a state of retrograde. And just like fall in October I’m chasing the taunting leaves, wanting to stay, but too fleeting to remember.
Thanks for reading! <3 it’s not the best but thought I’d share <3
