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tips?
Aug 19, 2016 21:38:09 GMT -5
Post by breadcat on Aug 19, 2016 21:38:09 GMT -5
tips on having self-confidence?
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Post by Deleted on Aug 19, 2016 22:17:37 GMT -5
OMG, I WHENT THROUGH THIS HUGE PROBLEM WITH SELF CONFIDENCE. I HAS KNOWLEDGE TO SHARE, 1 SEC
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Post by Deleted on Aug 19, 2016 22:48:03 GMT -5
Fake it till you make it.
I'm only sort of kidding. I'm writing a blog post about this, but it's taking me a while, because I can't really pinpoint a single moment when I went from hating myself to actually sort of liking myself. It's a gradual process and requires that you're patient with yourself, which can be difficult given the circumstances.
But one of the first things I did was compliment myself. They were empty compliments, but I gave them. I'd look at myself in the mirror and tell myself, You look really nice today. I didn't always mean it, but I let it hang there. I did this in lots of different situations: when I was in public, I'd think, You have the potential to do a lot of good today. I'd make goals (small ones) and act on them. Then I'd tell myself that I was proud, even if I wasn't. Eventually, these goals grew, I was doing more, I was saying more, and I was believing more. I saw the things that I was doing (and how great I felt doing them). Not every accomplishment was a big one, but it was a step forward. Keeping a journal to document these small and growing victories is a good idea.
Know that it is not uncommon to feel unconfident. Most everyone has moments of weakness and insecurity. They're easier to overcome when we use our fears and reserve as motivation to do good for ourselves and for others, too.
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tips?
Aug 19, 2016 22:56:40 GMT -5
Post by Deleted on Aug 19, 2016 22:56:40 GMT -5
Alright, so you don't feel to good about yourself, what are you feeling, because it depends on a lot of stuff.
first you got to recognize the problem. You you feel self conscious about your body? Not being able to do something? Being weird cause you like something not everyone likes? Something else? (You don't have to say, just recognize it it your mind).
Now you need to think about the people around you. how they think about how they think about you. And deal with it. Nothin's gonna change no matter how much you want it (I'm talking about people's opinions). I mean, they might change, but is it really worth changing yourself for the convince of others? It's really hard to explain, so I'm just going to tell you my experiences.
so pretty much my whole school life I have been self conscious. Always thinking and makeing my decisions for the benefit of OTHER people, trying to make them like me and such. I truly believed I wasn't good enough, I thought people thought I was ugly, annoying, and weird (tbh I am pretty weird, I kinda don't blame em for that). I have thought this for a very long time, but a couple of years ago (I'm still in school) I was just done. Done with being afraid to do something because the people around me thought down on it. I guess all those years of being so self conscious got boreing. I'm not saying I'm perfect, I definitely still am a bit self conscious, but what helped me is realizing that it really doesn't matter what other people think of you. This is a bit depressing, but the fact is, that you, I, and everyone (except the president) are just specks on this world. We won't really be remembered (I realize this thing I'm talking about kinda depends on a persons religion, but hey, works for me). You are only going to be on this earth for like under 110 years maybe 80, maybe 50, idk, my point is are you really going to waste that short time you have with WORRYING about what OTHERS think of YOU!? Your probably in school right? (If not then just sit tight bro) you are not going to see these people forever. Before you know it you'll be out of school with your whole life ahead of you. Just remember that every time you feel self conscious, Frankly it's quite pointless, the sooner you realize this the happier you'll be.
i really hope this was helpful and you don't find it harsh, but getting over self consciousness is hard, and sometimes ya just gotta face the facts of reality.
Really hope you find yourself at piece soon!
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tips?
Aug 19, 2016 23:01:21 GMT -5
Post by breadcat on Aug 19, 2016 23:01:21 GMT -5
thanks you guys, this is very helpful.
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Post by Deleted on Aug 19, 2016 23:04:57 GMT -5
thanks you guys, this is very helpful. If you wanna discuss it further, I'm here and will help as needed. If I can go from hating myself to loving myself anyone can.
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Post by A crying Nidoking on Aug 19, 2016 23:13:43 GMT -5
Fake it till you make it has always worked for me.
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Iceblossom
Talk to me about Star Wars, the First Order, and Bucky Barnes.
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Post by Iceblossom on Aug 19, 2016 23:48:58 GMT -5
Step 1: Recognize the negative thought you're having. For example, "I'm really fat." or "They think I'm stupid." Step 2: Recognize the ways you are distorting the situation. For example, are you overweight to a point where it is dangerous for your health? Have they told you they think you are stupid? Step 3: Correct yourself. For example, "I'm fat, but I'm not dangerously overweight. Fat people are pretty too." or "They haven't told me they think I'm stupid. I'm just worried that I look stupid, so I'm projecting that onto them." One thing that's important is being honest with yourself too. For example, if you were actually overweight to the point where it was dangerous for your health, it would be honest to say "Yes, I am overweight and it is getting dangerous for me. I need to come up with a plan to lead a healthier lifestyle." Another thing I've done for a while is giving myself a compliment whenever I look in the mirror. I compliment my looks, my clothes, my attitude, whatever. There is always something to compliment. You can do it! I believe in you.
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Bisexual
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Post by 🎃❅❖.Şp໐໐kฯຟiຖ໓.❖❅🎃 on Aug 20, 2016 0:50:35 GMT -5
Believe in yourself force yourself to find yourself attractive when other people say "it's hot" you tell them "its because I'm here" i'm still struggling but there things are helping me?
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Post by Saint Ambrosef on Aug 20, 2016 0:58:45 GMT -5
used to have no self confidence or esteem. now some say im borderline egotistical. two things changed things for me:
(1) every time you think something negative about yourself, immediately think of 5 things you do like. whenever i thought about how i didn't like [blank], i'd start thinking how i loved my clear skin, and curly hair, my drawing talent, etc. and as time goes on your list grows from 5 to 10 to 50 things.
(2) fake it until it becomes real. it doesnt matter if ur peeing urself on the inside. act more confident than u actually are. square ur shoulders. stand up straight. speak nonchalantly. make everyone around you think ur actually confident just by body language. after pretending, it starts to come easy to you. and then it becomes real. just like memorizing a poem, the more you recite it the less you have to think about what ur saying, and soon you can roll it off without thinking of the words. works the same.
trust me this is an A+ plan.
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alyssa
past accounts: echocave, bumblrbee
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Post by alyssa on Aug 20, 2016 1:16:27 GMT -5
i hope youre not getting overwhelmed with the tips!! *0*
physical discomfort: 1) i took lots of selfies. take wonderful ones, where you look as beautiful as youve ever seen yourself. realize that though you might not think you look like your "best selfie" all the time, that selfie is of you. no edits, no nothin. you just looked real great & there's no denying it!! sometimes, people will see you, and see the best possible physical version. sometimes, they'll see double chins and weird faces, but thats ok too. 2) if you find being self conscious interferes with your ability to concentrate on conversations youre having face to face, put all your attention onto what the other person looks like instead (tbh the best advice i ever got) 3) wear cute clothes. admire yourself. look at your reflection when you brush your teeth. make silly faces at it. look at your reflection when you pass windows and see how great you look. notice the cute features you have. be as self absorbed as you possibly want. grace others with your presence. own it.
personality-wise: 1) hahahahahaaha this one is way harder and i havent worked this one out yet. but i like to compare myself with how i used to be. if i met my younger self, would she want to be more like the person i am today? and the answer will almost always be yes. keep working on it
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alyssa
past accounts: echocave, bumblrbee
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Post by alyssa on Aug 20, 2016 1:22:40 GMT -5
also "fake it till you make it" is A+ advice (ps. Saint Ambrosef's #2 advice is so true & Good)
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Post by sea cat on Aug 20, 2016 1:41:27 GMT -5
i agree with the fake it till you make it
my psych teacher said to me before my spanish speaking exam 'beyonce always goes onto stage pretending she's really confident so that's what i do and it always works for me. if beyonce's doing it, it has to be right so just pretend to be beyonce and you'll do great' so i did what she said and it worked
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