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Post by darkfrost on May 16, 2018 0:38:43 GMT -5
To be honest, I would leave out Firestar to see what happens. No offense Firestar fans but he's kind of a Mary Sue. And his death... Wheeze.
I would never have made Briarlight injured like she is. It's kind of unfair that she lost the use of her legs but I kind of understand why the Erin's did it. It pushed blossomfall away from Millie and her family and into the Dark Forest. I think the Erin's were looking for more recruits.
What do you guys think?
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#a3c5e6
Name Colour
𝓣𝓲𝓷𝓾𝓿𝓲𝓮𝓵
Warrior Fanatic
All hail me, the flower-flushing queen of Prague
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Post by 𝓣𝓲𝓷𝓾𝓿𝓲𝓮𝓵 on May 16, 2018 0:50:13 GMT -5
I really don't get how Firestar is a sue/stu. Also, if you're referring to what I think you're referring to, then Firestar actually died of his wounds after fighting Tigerstar.
Anyway, as for what I'd change about the series... alot, actually. BloodClan for one would either be non-existent, or it (as well as Firestar's relation to Scourge) would be more prominent in the story.
Mothwing and Hawkfrost would be Leopardstar's kits instead of Sasha's, and their roles would be reversed.
Hollyleaf would be the Third, and would be like a living lie detector.
Cinderpelt and Cinderheart would be separate cats.
BramblexSquirrel would be less problematic.
Redtail would live longer.
FirexSpotted wouldn't exist, and Cinderpelt wouldn't have a crush on him either.
The Great Battle would actually happen in PoT, which would be less dragging in its storyline.
And those are just a few examples.
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Post by ❅Maplefrost❅ on May 16, 2018 1:21:17 GMT -5
I'd mainly change most of the romance, ugh. Starting with Fire x Sand....
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Post by wheeledwarrior on May 16, 2018 8:14:43 GMT -5
I'd be interested what would happen if the series was written for adults rather than children. It be interesting to see longer lengths, less predictable writing, and some scenes in more detail.
Relating to the series as well, I might keep it for children, but with less characters. I like the idea of having lots of characters to root for, but there's just so many that they can't all be developed, and a lot of them suffer because of it...
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Post by Amberfoot on May 16, 2018 9:23:43 GMT -5
I think I would cut out Omen of the Stars entirely, and flesh out Power of Three. I would make the storyline go by quicker and have Holly be the third cat. I would still have the same thing happen, how she killed Ashfur and disappeared, but I would have her absence not last as long. Maybe in the tunnels she could have found out her power? And the dark forest battle could happen in Power of Three as well.
By condensing the series Power of Three and OOTS into one, we could also weed out how ancient some of the original "cast" is. Like it wouldn't be so odd that Cloudtail, almost an elder, had kits so recently (same with Thornclaw). I would get rid of Lion and Cinder's second litter.
I would get rid of Bramblestar's storm super edition and just focus on the next series, AVOS. I would make Ambermoon, Snowbush, and Dewnose more prominent characters. I would also keep Squirrel barren but she can make up with Bramblestar and accept Jay and Lion as their kits (and maybe keep more of a relationship with them). I also think that the AVOS point of view could be from Cinder and Lion's first litter when they were apprentices: Hollytuft, Sorrelstripe, or Fernsong.
But I like the series, don't get me wrong. But I think it would flow better and we could have more characterization with the current characters if we left a series out (and a lot of young cats end up dying that never had characters and that's too bad...)
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Post by Deleted on May 16, 2018 20:19:40 GMT -5
I would get rid of powers completely. They seemed really out of place, and they didn't have a lot of purpose. I would keep Jayfeather's power though.
An aspect I really disliked about TPOT and OOTS was how omnipresent StarClan became. It was really jarring in contrast to their indirect nature in the first two arcs. I would probably cut out the Dark Forest/Place of No Stars too.
There's a lot I would change about the series, but those are the first two that come to my mind.
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Post by Jaysnow on May 16, 2018 23:42:02 GMT -5
Hollyleaf would still be alive and well. Screw off, Hawkfrost.
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Post by Dancing_Totodile on May 17, 2018 0:00:39 GMT -5
Cats wouldn't die a second time.
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Post by Amberfoot on May 17, 2018 8:37:19 GMT -5
Yeah, still not sure how I feel about the whole dark forest thing. I think its stretching out old enemies that have long passed a little too far. I loved how mysterious StarClan was in the first and second arc. It would be really awesome if they had kept it that way because then maybe the "powers" could have been used for something like fighting a revived BloodClan, or even Darktail, or something of that nature.
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Post by Thunderheart57 on May 17, 2018 10:07:12 GMT -5
First of all, I would give BloodClan and Scourge more prominence in the first arc. They were not built up to be a big threat early on, and doing that would raise the stakes higher towards the end. The Clans would be fearful of a fifth Clan that would be moving in the forest, only to find out that these cats were taken advantage of by Tigerstar and ShadowClan. I would include a character interaction between Bluestar and Scourge during the events of A Dangerous Path. I think that Scourge seeing the cat who basically saved his life eons ago would bring out a more timid side to him, and her death would help him realize that Tigerstar's reign would ultimately destroy not only the Clans, but might turn on him at the last minute. He could come to Firestar's aid during the end of the Darkest Hour after suffering under Tigerstar's brutal practices and turns on him. Tigerstar's death would play out normally, but Scourge would not turn back on Firestar in the end. After the battle is over, Scourge realizes that the forest is harsher than city life, and leaves with BloodClan, but forms a friendship with Firestar and ThunderClan. (They would not be related in this version.)
Next, I would shorten The New Prophecy arc. Everything from Starlight would be squeezed into Dawn, and have the focus shift towards the WindClan civil war in Twilight and Sunset. I would give Crowfeather a POV in Starlight, Twilight, and Sunset so that the readers would have a perspective from the divided Clan. Mudclaw would not be killed off in Starlight, as I would give him motivation and reasoning behind his revolt against Onewhisker, and even have Crowfeather side with him due to him believing that Mudclaw would be a better leader. Tigerstar and the Dark Forest would be cut. Hawkfrost teams up with Mudclaw, and becomes a WindClan cat after offering to join his group.
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Post by chimken nugget on May 17, 2018 18:56:04 GMT -5
Hollyleaf would become leader. And nobody would lose their personalities or not have one in the first place.
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Post by Forestheart on May 18, 2018 5:37:41 GMT -5
Personally, I would change the fact that almost all of OG Tigerstar's descendants look and act like carbon copies of him. It gets super repetitive having "a dark brown tabby tom with broad shoulders" as the default pelt for Tigerstar's male descendants.
I would have also have made Hawkfrost a decent cat who didn't want to follow in Tigerstar's footsteps (similar to Bramblestar but not as boring).
An evil medicine cat however would be an interesting idea in my opinion.
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Post by twisterheartz on May 18, 2018 9:11:42 GMT -5
Do the Manga’s count? If so I wish Sasha never left the captain Guy..... it honestly really made me sad D:
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