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Post by [~Ghost Writer~] on Dec 6, 2017 18:57:30 GMT -5
Hello everyone
I've come back from a writer's biggest nightmare (Writer's block) to give you a new story!
Well, I guess it's not completely new. This is a rewrite of When The Earth Shook. This time It'll follow eight characters
instead of the ten I was going for in the first one. I'm also going to include characters that were mentioned, but didn't
appear in the first one. And just a heads up if you have never read one of my stories before, this is blood and mental
illnesses mentioned in my stories always. I write tragedies. I really recommend not reading this if you dislike reading these types of stories. Now that the warning is out of the way, Onto the story!
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Post by [~Ghost Writer~] on Dec 6, 2017 18:57:40 GMT -5
The Beginning {Chapter One}-
Meadowstar' P.O.W
In the small meadow where Meadowclan had made it's territory long ago, flames had hungrily gnawed at the land the day of a lightning storm. The leader, a tom named Meadowstar, had been trying hard to drag his injured or dead clanmates out of the burning dens of bramble and heather. Panic filled his nerves as he spotted the dark black pelt of his only daughter laying still under one of the fallen oak trees that use to act as a wall of protection for the clan. He rushed into the smoked filled den and cried out her name but the she-cat continued to be unresponsive. He pushed on the oak with all the strength he had. Meadowstar coughed hard as the smoke entered his lungs and refused him fresh air. He continued to push when he spotted a flash of red fur. Alderdusk, a young but experienced warrior, pushed on the tree with his shoulder nest to the leader.
"You need to get out of here and help the others!" The ginger and white tom yelled. "Don't worry about Batflight. She'll be back on her feet in no time." The tom gave him the same sure smile he always would. Meadowstar was hesitant on leaving his daughter with Alderdusk. He looked from Alderdusk, to Batflight, and then to the exit of the den. sounds of agony and helplessness rang from the other dens, which made Meadowstar flinch. He looked back at the young warrior. Anxiety and fear engolfed him as he realized he had to leave his only remaining family in the paws of someone else. His eyes narrowed as the two cats looked at each other. "Get her out of here alive Alderdusk. That's an order!" With that, Meadowstar left in a hurry.
The smell of burning fur made his nose wrinkle with disgust. He followed the scent to the elder's den and squeezed his way through the cracks of rubble that use to shelter the old cats. Meadowstar nearly dropped to the ground when he saw his deputy and the three elders of the clan dead on the ground. He wanted to break down at the sight of his best friend and deputy's burnt body. He felt the bile creep up his throat and swallowed it. Now was not the time to grieve. That would come later. He grabbed the scruff of her neck and began to drag her out of the mess of ferns and stone. He took a look around camp before he ducked into the den again. He could see Goldenmask, a new queen, hunched over the bodies of her kits begging them to get up. By the apprentice den, Lostpaw was dragging Nettlepaw and Spiderpaw out with the help of Sorrelclaw. The whole of the clan was up in flames and his cats were suffering. Meadowstar, not wanting to make eye contact with his hurting clanmates, ducked back into the elder's den and continued to drag more bodies one by one. By the time he dragged all three out, the rain started to pour down from the dark, grey, sky. Meadowstar looked up at the clouds that covered the once bright moon and let out a sigh of relief as the droplets trickled down his cheeks. His ears perked as he heard Batflight's tired pawsteps come out of the warrior's den. He couldn't tell if the water in his eyes was rain or his own tears as he raced to see his daughter. Sobbing now with relief, Meadowstar laid his head on Batflight's shoulder and licked some of the soot off her pelt.
"I was so worried about you." Meadowstar looked down at his daughter and purred. "I was so afraid I'd never talk to you again." Batflight gave him a weak smile. "I'm alright Meadowstar. I'm your daughter after all." She purred jokingly as they both gave a nervous laugh. Meadowstar turned his attention to Alderdusk. The grey tom smiled up at him, his eyes full of gratitude. "I couldn't ever thank you enough Alderdusk. You saved my only daughter." Alderdusk shook his head in slight embarrassment and Meadowstar shook his head back with a smile. He looked back at Batflight and chuckled. "You better snatch him up before any other she-cats decide to." Batflight laughed and walked off before her father could make anymore joke about the two. After the black she-cat left, Meadowstar sighed and looked back at Alderdusk with a serious look in his eyes. "Willowfur is in Starclan now. And so is Longpelt, Mouseblaze, and-" The leader paused with hesitation. "Mary." Meadowstar looked down at his paws as a look of shock rested on the young tom's face. Meadowstar had known Alderdusk's adoptive mother, Mary, for a long time. She was a sweet she-cat and a wonderful mother to Alderdusk when his real mother died of greencough. He didn't know how her death would effect the tom but it came as a surprise to him when Alderdusk didn't say anything about Mary. "I'm so sorry about Willowfur." Alderdusk whispered. "I know she meant a lot to you." Meadowstar felt his throat tighten just thinking about the nice she-cat's burnt body. He wanted to say something in return but no words would escape his mouth. Instead, he just nodded. He turned to leave and check up on Goldenmask, but before he did, he paused and looked towards Alderdusk. "I'd like to talk to you about the open deputy spot. As you know, this clan can't survive without a deputy and I need a strong, loyal cat by my side right now." Before the tom could respond, Meadowstar turned away and left. He knew the clan needed rebuilding and leadership and he knew Alderdusk was the best cat for the job. He took a deep breath and looked up at the sinking moon. The sweet scent of heather and river breeze flooded his senses. He could almost feel the soft white fur of his old mate brushing against his again and a sense of comfort came over him. "Fallingfeather... I wish you were here to calm everyone down like you use to. Not only does the clan need you, but I need you." Meadowstar stared quietly at the moon for a few heartbeats, only to hear the howls of the cold wind. He sighed and continued his way to Goldenmask, disappointed.
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Post by [~Ghost Writer~] on Dec 6, 2017 18:57:53 GMT -5
save 2
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Post by [~Ghost Writer~] on Dec 6, 2017 18:58:10 GMT -5
save 3
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Post by [~Ghost Writer~] on Dec 6, 2017 18:58:25 GMT -5
save 4
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Post by [~Ghost Writer~] on Dec 6, 2017 18:58:38 GMT -5
Save 5
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Post by [~Ghost Writer~] on Dec 6, 2017 18:58:58 GMT -5
Charaters
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Post by [~Ghost Writer~] on Dec 6, 2017 18:59:10 GMT -5
map
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Post by [~Ghost Writer~] on Dec 6, 2017 18:59:29 GMT -5
credit
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Post by [~Ghost Writer~] on Dec 6, 2017 18:59:40 GMT -5
other
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Post by [~Ghost Writer~] on Dec 6, 2017 18:59:53 GMT -5
Open~
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Post by [~Ghost Writer~] on Dec 6, 2017 19:26:27 GMT -5
Part of Chapter one is up
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Post by mintedstar/fur on Dec 7, 2017 13:04:00 GMT -5
Oh, oh! If you've got fans, fan me!
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Post by [~Ghost Writer~] on Dec 7, 2017 17:37:14 GMT -5
Thanks Mint I actually have the plot written completely down with this story so I will DEFINITELY be finishing it this time
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Post by mintedstar/fur on Dec 7, 2017 18:41:56 GMT -5
That's awesome!! Can't wait to hear it all!
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Post by [~Ghost Writer~] on Dec 7, 2017 22:36:26 GMT -5
I could actually use your help a bit on the plot if you don't mind me spoiling it for you in PM. Most of my pals that write don't read Warriors and I need to see if you can spot any plot holes.
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Post by mintedstar/fur on Dec 7, 2017 22:40:48 GMT -5
Go ahead! I'd love to.
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Post by mintedstar/fur on Dec 7, 2017 22:52:30 GMT -5
Also, small mistake I noticed, but otherwise your writing is so beautiful. "He felt the bile creep up his throat and swallowed it. Now was not the time to grieve."
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Post by [~Ghost Writer~] on Dec 8, 2017 0:43:35 GMT -5
Thank you so much! I would have never caught that.
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Post by [~Ghost Writer~] on Dec 8, 2017 0:46:13 GMT -5
Edited
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Post by mintedstar/fur on Dec 8, 2017 1:07:54 GMT -5
Cool! I love how detailed this chapter is. You really feel like you are watching the characters and all the personalities are defined, even from just that first chapter.
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Post by [~Ghost Writer~] on Dec 8, 2017 1:11:27 GMT -5
Thank you <3 my characters are my babies as you know ^~^
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Post by mintedstar/fur on Dec 8, 2017 1:34:50 GMT -5
I can tell! You pour so much into them. I'm starting to like other characters other than Goldenmask.
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Post by [~Ghost Writer~] on Dec 8, 2017 1:49:54 GMT -5
And you get a little background on Goldenmask too!
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Post by mintedstar/fur on Dec 8, 2017 2:01:08 GMT -5
Nice! Background info has always interested me. I helps figure out motives.
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Post by [~Ghost Writer~] on Dec 8, 2017 2:17:52 GMT -5
Mhmm. I'm sad to say she's not going to be a main character, but she will be an important Character and you will be seeing her quite a bit
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Post by mintedstar/fur on Dec 8, 2017 2:52:17 GMT -5
Hey, who ever said I only had main character favorites? Actually they are usually more know secondary characters (which is why I'm already worrying about her, cause my favorite secondary characters always die. Or my favorites just die period...) *bites nails*
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Post by [~Ghost Writer~] on Dec 8, 2017 12:32:20 GMT -5
*Pats head* we'll see. :3
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Post by mintedstar/fur on Dec 8, 2017 13:14:52 GMT -5
Alright. I can sort of live with a we'll see....
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