Post by 𝕊𝕙𝕒𝕕𝕠𝕨 on Jun 17, 2017 22:35:24 GMT -5
To Be Alone - - - ✽
Note - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - ✽
This one-shot is for ᴛᴜᴇsᴅᴀʏ 's challenge thread Tuesday Challenges. The prompt for the week between 6/12/17-6/19/17 was Return. Bonus points are rewarded for the return NOT being a character. But, once I saw this prompt, my first idea was the return of something that is not physical. That day I began writing this story, and I had worked on it from time to time fora few days. This is also my first entry for Tuesday's Challenge thread. I hope you enjoy the story as much as I enjoyed writing it!
Side-Note: This is set in past tense, the italics are Hollypaw's reactions to the story as they occurred.
If you enjoyed this story, you can check out A Lesson on Empathy. It is a Fan-Fiction based on Warriors. The story is written by me.
________________________
Authors Note:
This story is about what the effects of neglecting might have on one. To clarify, Shatteredsky did care for Hollypaw when she was a kit, but barely showed love or did anything special for her, therefor neglecting her kit. In this story, I wanted to show the Effects of Neglect, the Importance of Understanding, and the Importance of Forgiveness. I in no way condemn child neglect or animal neglecting at all, but one must understand sometimes people do have reasons for becoming distant, they don't mean to desert you, it just...happens. Even if this theme is not seen, I hope you enjoy reading it regardless.
Side-Note: This is set in past tense, the italics are Hollypaw's reactions to the story as they occurred.
If you enjoyed this story, you can check out A Lesson on Empathy. It is a Fan-Fiction based on Warriors. The story is written by me.
________________________
Authors Note:
This story is about what the effects of neglecting might have on one. To clarify, Shatteredsky did care for Hollypaw when she was a kit, but barely showed love or did anything special for her, therefor neglecting her kit. In this story, I wanted to show the Effects of Neglect, the Importance of Understanding, and the Importance of Forgiveness. I in no way condemn child neglect or animal neglecting at all, but one must understand sometimes people do have reasons for becoming distant, they don't mean to desert you, it just...happens. Even if this theme is not seen, I hope you enjoy reading it regardless.
The Story - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - ✽
-
“Don’t you have anything to say to me?”
No, she told herself, and glared across from her, a elderly she-cat with mottled silver fur and pale blue eyes looked pleadingly at her. But she kept silent.
“Please Hollypaw, say something!” The elderly she-cat begged, her eyes watching the younger black, silver and orange calico she-cat.
“Fine" she said angrily, and growled, "Now leave me alone Shatteredsky!” Hollypaw ordered, turning her back and running, crossing away from the elders den she was in and entering the apprentice den.
Just leave me alone. I’m not being that naive kit anymore.
------------------------------
-
“Hollypaw, why do you always ignore your mother? What did she ever do to you?” A small tiger patterned tom asked Hollypaw as she laid awake watching the stars.
Hollypaw narrowed her pastel green eyes, and snapped her head toward him, the rest of the cats were fast asleep, but his eyes were trained on her, so she simply tried to avoid the question, “I didn’t know anyone else was awake, but apparently you are Cricketpaw.”
“Answer the question.” Cricketpaw plainly ordered, letting off a yawn after he did so.
“Well, first off, she’s not my mother,” Hollypaw retorted, her gaze cold and stern, “Second, she did nothing.”
“She is your mother, you are her kit, and if she didn’t do anything bad to you why are you so mad at her?” Cricketpaw asked with an annoyed tone.
“I said she did nothing,” Hollypaw corrected, and closed her eyes, ignoring the toms questions as she tried to sleep.
No, she never did anything for me at all, and she’s not my mother.
----------------------------
-
The memories...make them go away- Make her leave me alone!
Hollypaw silently pleaded to the sky, the stars above her. She stared up, eyes almost showing no emotions as the cat beside her spoke to her, the words passing over Hollypaw’s head as if they were simply the grass under her paws during a midday walk.
“Just shut up!” Hollypaw ordered the older silver cat, turning her own eyes and glaring at Shatteredsky, whose eyes filled with shock, but turned to sympathy.
“No Hollypaw, I was never the mother you deserved. I am so sorry, but there are cats who love you, and I do love you-” Shatteredsky began, but fell silent as Hollypaw just turned her head and glared.
“Sure, you’re sorry now, what about when I was a kit? When I was alone? What did you ever do for me? You claim you love me, but you’re just a liar!” Hollypaw snapped. Inside she wanted to give in, to succumb to crying, but she held back the pain, her stubbornness getting the better of her.
No. Don’t let her see. She doesn’t deserve to see. She doesn’t care.
“I know, I know, there are no excuses. But Hollypaw-” Shatteredsky begged, her eyes watching the younger she-cat.
“You’re right!” Hollypaw said, then narrowed her green eyes, “There are no excuses!”
Shatteredsky sighed, and walked off, eyes trailed upon the floor.
I’ll never return to trusting you Shatteredsky.
----------------------------
-
Her eyes gaze across the sky, spotting the fluffy white clouds, and the rising golden sun. Her eyes were illuminated by the light, and she gave a soft sigh as she watched the sun, her calico fur curling from the breeze blowing nearby. Almost unblinking, contemplating deep within her thoughts.
I just wish someone would understand.
Her eyes swiftly following the light clouds, tipping her head in curiosity. Behind her, the clan seemed to be enjoying the rituals of chat and social interaction. Hollypaw was different, she had little to no interest in socializing.
After all, what have any of them done to help me?
Different from the perspective she wanted to have, Hollypaw was rather upset about the whole situation.
Why do I have to be alone?
Why did she never care?
Why do they side with her?
Why do I feel guilty?
Why do I feel broken?
Her eyes snapped to a sudden movement erupting near her in an elderberry plant, green eyes sparking with sudden interest. She heard a soft rattle buzz the air, but the scent revealed that whatever it was didn’t smell like a fox or badger. Perhaps a bird? She wondered, and turned away, starting to head back to camp.
Though her thoughts turned harsh as a familiar voice hit her ears.
“Hollypaw watch out!” Shatteredsky yelled out, running toward her stubborn daughter. Eyes wide in alarm, Shatteredsky flung herself near Hollypaw protectively.
Hollypaw watched confused as the rattling grew behind her, she quickly turned, and her eyes fell upon a black rattle snake, whose fangs bared ready to strike. To her, everything started to feel slower, but she couldn't move, her limbs refusing to react. Her eyes widened in shock as Shatteredsky stepped between the snake and herself. She was forced to watch helplessly as she witnessed the snake’s fangs bury into Shatteredsky’s skin, her own eyes reflecting horror.
----------------------------
-
What-What just happened?
Hollypaw was distant, she let go of her feelings, and she broke down. Tear streaked cheeks and ragged fur helped display the emotion, much to her own unwillingness. She was seated in the medicine cat den to be with Shatteredsky, who was then struggling against the pain of her wound, two deep marks streaked Shatteredsky’s fur, blood had seeped from them.
“Hollypaw,” Shatteredsky began as she stirred, her eyes full of pain and despair. “I’m so sorry for everything I have done to you…” she whispered, using most of her energy to even speak the words.
Hollypaw didn’t argue, she only sat and stared at Shatteredsky, her eyes reflecting the emotions Shatteredsky’s did, but Hollypaw had no wounds, not externally.
“I know, that while you were a kit, I never gave you attention or affection...it’s just-” she gasped as pain struck through her veins, her nerves struck by the venom. “It’s just after your siblings had passed as kits...I blamed myself. I always thought maybe if you didn’t have me be close to you, you could be alive and healthy…” Shatteredsky croaked.
Hollypaw felt her heart aching at the words, calling the words to memory as Shatteredsky spoke them. Yet she stayed silent, eyes gazing upon Shatteredsky as the she-cat finished the plea.
“But I know now the mistakes I had made…” Shatteredsky admitted, her eyes full of pain as the venom rushed through her body. “Leaving you with no affection made you alone, and being alone is the worst pain one can truly feel…” Shatteredsky explained, stopping to cough.
You know that...because you felt it.
“I know you may never forgive me, but I do love you and I always have-my dear…” Shatteredsky croaked, her eyes reflecting the light of the sun.
I understand...
“I forgive you,” Hollypaw found herself saying, ignoring her doubts. Now she knew, she knew why, and even if she disagreed with it, Shatteredsky proved her true intent by saving her. “Mom, I love you too.” Hollypaw said, feeling the water in her eyes drift down, gravity guiding them to the cold floor.
I love you too.
“Don’t you have anything to say to me?”
No, she told herself, and glared across from her, a elderly she-cat with mottled silver fur and pale blue eyes looked pleadingly at her. But she kept silent.
“Please Hollypaw, say something!” The elderly she-cat begged, her eyes watching the younger black, silver and orange calico she-cat.
“Fine" she said angrily, and growled, "Now leave me alone Shatteredsky!” Hollypaw ordered, turning her back and running, crossing away from the elders den she was in and entering the apprentice den.
Just leave me alone. I’m not being that naive kit anymore.
------------------------------
-
“Hollypaw, why do you always ignore your mother? What did she ever do to you?” A small tiger patterned tom asked Hollypaw as she laid awake watching the stars.
Hollypaw narrowed her pastel green eyes, and snapped her head toward him, the rest of the cats were fast asleep, but his eyes were trained on her, so she simply tried to avoid the question, “I didn’t know anyone else was awake, but apparently you are Cricketpaw.”
“Answer the question.” Cricketpaw plainly ordered, letting off a yawn after he did so.
“Well, first off, she’s not my mother,” Hollypaw retorted, her gaze cold and stern, “Second, she did nothing.”
“She is your mother, you are her kit, and if she didn’t do anything bad to you why are you so mad at her?” Cricketpaw asked with an annoyed tone.
“I said she did nothing,” Hollypaw corrected, and closed her eyes, ignoring the toms questions as she tried to sleep.
No, she never did anything for me at all, and she’s not my mother.
----------------------------
-
The memories...make them go away- Make her leave me alone!
Hollypaw silently pleaded to the sky, the stars above her. She stared up, eyes almost showing no emotions as the cat beside her spoke to her, the words passing over Hollypaw’s head as if they were simply the grass under her paws during a midday walk.
“Just shut up!” Hollypaw ordered the older silver cat, turning her own eyes and glaring at Shatteredsky, whose eyes filled with shock, but turned to sympathy.
“No Hollypaw, I was never the mother you deserved. I am so sorry, but there are cats who love you, and I do love you-” Shatteredsky began, but fell silent as Hollypaw just turned her head and glared.
“Sure, you’re sorry now, what about when I was a kit? When I was alone? What did you ever do for me? You claim you love me, but you’re just a liar!” Hollypaw snapped. Inside she wanted to give in, to succumb to crying, but she held back the pain, her stubbornness getting the better of her.
No. Don’t let her see. She doesn’t deserve to see. She doesn’t care.
“I know, I know, there are no excuses. But Hollypaw-” Shatteredsky begged, her eyes watching the younger she-cat.
“You’re right!” Hollypaw said, then narrowed her green eyes, “There are no excuses!”
Shatteredsky sighed, and walked off, eyes trailed upon the floor.
I’ll never return to trusting you Shatteredsky.
----------------------------
-
Her eyes gaze across the sky, spotting the fluffy white clouds, and the rising golden sun. Her eyes were illuminated by the light, and she gave a soft sigh as she watched the sun, her calico fur curling from the breeze blowing nearby. Almost unblinking, contemplating deep within her thoughts.
I just wish someone would understand.
Her eyes swiftly following the light clouds, tipping her head in curiosity. Behind her, the clan seemed to be enjoying the rituals of chat and social interaction. Hollypaw was different, she had little to no interest in socializing.
After all, what have any of them done to help me?
Different from the perspective she wanted to have, Hollypaw was rather upset about the whole situation.
Why do I have to be alone?
Why did she never care?
Why do they side with her?
Why do I feel guilty?
Why do I feel broken?
Her eyes snapped to a sudden movement erupting near her in an elderberry plant, green eyes sparking with sudden interest. She heard a soft rattle buzz the air, but the scent revealed that whatever it was didn’t smell like a fox or badger. Perhaps a bird? She wondered, and turned away, starting to head back to camp.
Though her thoughts turned harsh as a familiar voice hit her ears.
“Hollypaw watch out!” Shatteredsky yelled out, running toward her stubborn daughter. Eyes wide in alarm, Shatteredsky flung herself near Hollypaw protectively.
Hollypaw watched confused as the rattling grew behind her, she quickly turned, and her eyes fell upon a black rattle snake, whose fangs bared ready to strike. To her, everything started to feel slower, but she couldn't move, her limbs refusing to react. Her eyes widened in shock as Shatteredsky stepped between the snake and herself. She was forced to watch helplessly as she witnessed the snake’s fangs bury into Shatteredsky’s skin, her own eyes reflecting horror.
----------------------------
-
What-What just happened?
Hollypaw was distant, she let go of her feelings, and she broke down. Tear streaked cheeks and ragged fur helped display the emotion, much to her own unwillingness. She was seated in the medicine cat den to be with Shatteredsky, who was then struggling against the pain of her wound, two deep marks streaked Shatteredsky’s fur, blood had seeped from them.
“Hollypaw,” Shatteredsky began as she stirred, her eyes full of pain and despair. “I’m so sorry for everything I have done to you…” she whispered, using most of her energy to even speak the words.
Hollypaw didn’t argue, she only sat and stared at Shatteredsky, her eyes reflecting the emotions Shatteredsky’s did, but Hollypaw had no wounds, not externally.
“I know, that while you were a kit, I never gave you attention or affection...it’s just-” she gasped as pain struck through her veins, her nerves struck by the venom. “It’s just after your siblings had passed as kits...I blamed myself. I always thought maybe if you didn’t have me be close to you, you could be alive and healthy…” Shatteredsky croaked.
Hollypaw felt her heart aching at the words, calling the words to memory as Shatteredsky spoke them. Yet she stayed silent, eyes gazing upon Shatteredsky as the she-cat finished the plea.
“But I know now the mistakes I had made…” Shatteredsky admitted, her eyes full of pain as the venom rushed through her body. “Leaving you with no affection made you alone, and being alone is the worst pain one can truly feel…” Shatteredsky explained, stopping to cough.
You know that...because you felt it.
“I know you may never forgive me, but I do love you and I always have-my dear…” Shatteredsky croaked, her eyes reflecting the light of the sun.
I understand...
“I forgive you,” Hollypaw found herself saying, ignoring her doubts. Now she knew, she knew why, and even if she disagreed with it, Shatteredsky proved her true intent by saving her. “Mom, I love you too.” Hollypaw said, feeling the water in her eyes drift down, gravity guiding them to the cold floor.
I love you too.
Story and Coding Made by 𝕊𝕙𝕒𝕕𝕠𝕨
