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other old fanfictions update 7/4

mew

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tiger beetle

Warrior Fanatic

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Pronouns: all (default they)

other old fanfictions update 7/4 Jun 15, 2017 21:10:58 GMT -5 phantomstar57 likes this

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Post by tiger beetle on Jun 15, 2017 21:10:58 GMT -5

So I posted a thread the other day with everything I had written of Three United: Swiftpaw's Prophecy and Secrets of the Night, plus the major plot points planned for later books in the series.

I have a few other finished fanfictions and probably a lot of pieces. I didn't think to make extra saves for my other fanfiction bits on the TU thread, though. I'm not sure how many are on the computer, but there will be at least a few.

Let's see how much I can find…and how much energy I have to tear it apart.

coming soon:

latest update:
Rainingwinds allegiances and Swiftfoot/Swiftclaw art
Flamepelt art including two characters I'd forgotten
one more RockClan Calls picture
old picture for the third grade game

post 1: for now, just an intro
post 2: RockClan Calls +
post 3: Broken Glass, Dappled Leaves*, Falling Petals +
post 4: Time, Ominous Signs, Redstar's Task, Smokepaw's Journey
post 5: Rainingwinds, Victory in Death, third grade
post 6: Flamepelt, Model Magic universe*, Brightwhisker, Never Again, The Last Hope rewrite
post 7: Outcast, I'd Touch the Sky for You, Heart of the Wild, Thunder Rises

Moral of the story: don't throw the baby out with the bathwater.

Genderqueer

tiger beetle

Warrior Fanatic

=^ò.ó^=

Pronouns: all (default they)

other old fanfictions update 7/4 Jun 15, 2017 21:11:14 GMT -5 wadevvilson likes this

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Post by tiger beetle on Jun 15, 2017 21:11:14 GMT -5

RockClan Calls story (document "AUTUMNSTAR" created 6/27/2012, last modified 7/21/2013)

SPOILER: Click to show

PROLOGUE
Hail, Snow, Sleet, Rain, and Graupel were littermates. They were born in mountains far from the Clans, and traveled together. (this was the prologue of all versions except maybe the Bonestar version (the one I gave away); I was adamant on this backstory)

Hail took his strength from physical power; a natural leader, he considered himself above the other four. Snow was skillful at hunting unseen, and he fought viciously under pressure. Sleet was swift and shrewd, and she could weasel her way out of danger. Rain was clever and wily—proud and daring, she was swift in the water. Graupel was alert and agile, the best climber of the five. (can you tell which Clans they match to!? and also that I didn't like ThunderClan)

The brothers and sisters took refuge in a gorge during a terrible storm. They were found the next morning by a group of cats that intrigued them… SkyClan fascinated them with its code of honor, and the rogues set off a moon later with plans for a sixth Clan. (for what it's worth this was initially written for a comic…at least I think the comic was the original?)

Unfortunately the five fell to fighting: Graupel was terribly scarred and Snow’s left eye was torn out. Sleet finally ended the battle. She didn’t win, of course—Rain and Hail were much more powerful—but Sleet was the first to see sense. If there was no way to create a single Clan between the five of them, she reasoned, then why not build five Clans? It would take longer for the Clans to become powerful, but once complete, each Clan would be stronger. (no? her argument makes sense in terms of "we need to stop fighting now" but not "we'll be stronger in the end")

So five new Clans were created. Graupel made her home in a ravine, where her strong paws were an advantage. Rain took the section of forest with the most streams and the wettest ground. Hail took the area most lush with undergrowth, where he was the only one to fight through easily, and where there were most enemies to drive away. Sleet chose relatively unforested hills where she would see any attackers coming before they arrived. Snow preferred a mix of sparse land and thick forests, full of rocks and pitfalls, where nimble cats could hide easily. (a bit of "worldbuilding": SnowClan makes winter raids on the other Clans' territories/camps; GraupelClan was at one point driven out of the territories, lived as CaveClan in the mountains, and returned, taking back their old name; RainClan cats prefer to fight in the water and are totally okay with drowning their opponents)

StarClan did not watch over these cats. Instead, their ancestors lived in a lush forest: a forest hidden in a valley near the summit of the tallest mountain nearby. RockClan, they were called, for the stone mountains watched over the Clans started by cats who had lived in them. The five called their less favorable ancestors StormClan, for the storm had driven them to fighting long before, and the Clans should never forget. (I realized after I made the comic page that the storm had nothing to do with why they were fighting, but I just left it like this and hoped no one would notice)

(also! I have not read through what I have here yet, so I do not know if this was included in this continuity! Bonestar, the character I made the main character for my sort-of-friend, was a ShadowClan cat, which of course meant that ShadowClan got added to the continuity of these Clans! in-universe, the other three Clans teamed up to drive ShadowClan out of the lake territories, and they traveled until they found more Clans by chance; their territory was partly in the forest but partly in Twolegplace because there wasn't enough room in the forest)

CHAPTER ONE

“I’m Scratchstar and I’m old.” Bluekit squinted her left eye and stumbled clumsily around. “I’m old and I should be an elder but I don’t want to ‘cause I’m the Clan leader.” (rude)

“Can I try?” Autumnkit bounced to her paws as Bluekit sat down next to her. She closed her left eye and thought a moment, looking at her other sister—Streamkit—whose blue eyes glittered playfully.

Autumnkit grinned. “My name is Scratchstar and my face is scary. Plus I only have one ear.” She flattened her left ear. “And I scare the kits all the time because my face is weird.”

She sat back down and looked to Bluekit, who nodded approval and turned to Streamkit. “Your turn!” chirped the gray kit.

Streamkit twitched her whiskers. “No thanks.”

Bluekit shrugged. “I guess I’ll go again, then.” She tipped her head in thought.

“How about this one,” suggested Streamkit. “My name is Scratchstar and I’m watching the kits.” (how inventive)

Bluekit froze; so did Autumnkit.

Scratchstar came out from behind the ferns, shaking her head. “In only a few days you’ll be six moons old. You won’t be kits anymore. You won’t be able to get away with quite as much.” (don't let them get away with it now either! postpone their ceremony by a day or something, not enough to hold back their training but enough to demonstrate that they can't get away with this! or put them on tick duty?)

“Like sneaking out of camp through the secret path in the nursery,” Autumnkit agreed. (ah, yes; to facilitate plot in the game, we decided that there was a tiny crack at the back of the nursery, which opened into a small underground space, and after the kits got stuck there for a while we had them dig out the other side so they could sneak out whenever they wanted)

Scratchstar narrowed her eye. “I thought I told Darkpaw and Raggedpaw to block it off.”

Autumnkit’s spine pricked. She was about to say something about how hard the apprentices had worked, but she couldn’t figure out how to put it. (go ahead Autumnkit get defensive)

Bluekit spoke instead. “They didn’t do anything, Scratchstar. They played moss-ball with us and told us not to sneak out for a while.”

“Bluekit!” Autumnkit hissed. “I thought that was a secret!” (what else was she supposed to tell Scratchstar)

Bluekit’s eyes sparked. “I guess not!”

Autumnkit glared at her sister. “Darkpaw was the one who offered to play moss-ball in the first place and Raggedpaw was going to fix the den.” (defend your crush some more)

“No he wasn’t,” Streamkit replied promptly. “You asked them if they would play with you and they said okay.” (did I not know what a comma was!?)

Autumnkit sighed and didn’t respond.

Scratchstar called for her deputy. Mottlepelt padded up. “What?”

She turned to the kits instead of answering. “Once you’re apprentices you’ll be given punishments for mocking warriors, or even one another. They won’t be harsh punishments, but you still need to stop.” (oh yeah tell that to Shadowstar (two leaders after Scratchstar))

Mottlestar gave the kits a questioning look over Scratchstar’s shoulder and closed one eye. Streamkit nodded and he rolled his eyes. (wait why is Mottlepelt being rude!? also I called him Mottlestar…whoops)

Scratchstar flattened her ear as loud noises came from the other end of the camp. “I bet that’ll be Darkpaw and Starpaw patching the elders’ den. Mottlepelt, you talk to the kits.” She stalked away shouting the two apprentices’ names. (fun fact: Starpaw was designed to look like the white, brown, and tan patched cat from the online instructions for the Adventure Game)

“You know making fun of Scratchstar is really rude, right?” Mottlepelt asked, almost off-handedly. (okay but you're not coming across much better right now)

“We know,” Bluekit muttered. “We’re sorry and we’ll never do it again.”

Mottlepelt’s green eyes glimmered. “Why do I think that’s not true?” (that's not funny Mottlepelt)

Bluekit waved her tail. “Bye!” She scampered away; Streamkit and Autumnkit raced after her. Mottlepelt followed, sighing.

CHAPTER TWO

“Scratchstar! Scratchstar!” Bluekit shrieked. Streamkit and Autumnkit peered out from behind her; Streamkit started backing away nervously.

“Scratchstar!” Bluekit screeched urgently. (if they were three-moon-old kits this would be acceptable but…)

Scratchstar leapt to her paws, bristling. “What? What’s wrong?”

“It’s morning! It’s morning!” Bluekit bounced up and down proudly as Streamkit backed all the way out of the den.

“You woke me up to tell me it was morning?” Scratchstar asked scathingly.

Bluekit shrank back. “Sort of.”

“‘Sort of?’” Scratchstar asked. “Why only sort of?” (this is not how you admonish screeching kits)

“I also woke you up to tell you to make me an apprentice.” Bluekit puffed out her chest importantly. “Because I’m six moons old.”

“Oh, you are, are you?”

“Yeah! And Streamkit and Autumnkit are too!”

Scratchstar padded out of the den, tripping over Streamkit, who squealed. “Mouse dung!” Scratchstar spat.

Whimpering, Streamkit bounded over to her sisters. “She stepped on me!” she wailed. (being stepped on isn't fun but I get the feeling you were slinking around in front of her paws)

“Let all cats old enough to hunt their own prey join beneath the Highstone for a Clan meeting!” (…the Highstone? given that I played Shadowstar in the game--in my defense we had not yet decided that ShadowClan existed in this continuity!!!!!--I am completely responsible for calling it the Highstone)

Autumnkit followed her sisters out into the camp. Scratchstar perched on the tall gray-black rock at the edge. Several cats had already gathered, and more were padding sleepily from their dens.

“Bluekit, Streamkit, and Autumnkit, you are now six moons old. From this moment forward until you have earned your warrior names, you shall be known as Bluepaw, Streampaw, and Autumnpaw. Your mentors will be Nightsilver, Tabbyclaw, and Clawstorm.” The rust-colored she-cat leapt down from the Highstone as each new apprentice touched her nose to her mentor’s. (I still think Nightsilver is a cool-sounding name, but it is not a Clan name)

(there were lots of empty spaces here but I cut them for this)

PLOT OF THE STORY: "RockClan" visits every single warrior apprentice in the forest and tells them to meet at whatever the Fourtrees equivalent is. One of them will have further instructions. It turns out to be Shadowpaw of HailClan, who also happens to be the oldest warrior apprentice in all the Clans. Essentially they have to take a big journey to some random forest.

A bunch of apprentices die on the journey. They eventually make it to the forest, but setting foot in the cover of the trees releases StormClan spirits into the living world. The apprentices run back home (more of them die; Raggedpaw is the last to die, and he does so by slipping off a cliff while running in the mountains) and somehow save the day. Also, Autumnpaw conquers her fear of spirits.

EPILOGUE
_{years later}

(this epilogue is a slightly modified version of the one from the Bonestar edition! I wrote this style of epilogue in the Bonestar version specifically to be petty and dictate the future of the Clans so that my sort-of-friend could not declare things I didn't like canon)

(in the document there are not Clan labels before the paragraphs but just to help you guys out)

(GraupelClan)
Chillygaze continued being Cloudygaze’s eyes as his brother gradually lost the rest of his vision. (cataracts; the two are brothers) Neither of them spoke to Shadowpelt again due to peace on the HailClan-GraupelClan border. Branchclaw became the Clan’s best warrior and later deputy, but died fighting SnowClan. Riftpaw became Riftslash and then Riftstar when Cinderstar died.

(RainClan)
Rosetalon and Finchsplash were both excellent RainClan warriors. Finchsplash was drowned in battle by a SnowClan warrior, but Rosetalon lived to be RainClan’s oldest member. Frozenpaw became Frozenclaw. Coldpaw became Coldwhisker and then Coldstar; he made Frozenclaw his deputy. Eventually Riverpaw (once she was a senior warrior) caused a venomous snake to bite Frozenclaw and then killed the snake. (this was part of the game; my sister hated Coldstar and Frozenclaw) Coldstar, seeking revenge, attempted to kill the HailClan cat by shoving the dead snake’s still-poisonous fangs into her, but Streamsky blocked the bite. (aka I let Streamsky die as punishment because my sister liked her)

(fun fact!!! Coldstar (and in some versions Frozenclaw, though in others she stayed behind) followed the apprentices for most of their journey while still a kit, though the apprentices eventually found and protected him/them)

(SleetClan)
Whisperpaw and Breezepaw of SleetClan became Whisperflight and Breezewing. They proved themselves over and over in battle. (can you tell SleetClan was a non-entity)

(SnowClan)
Poppyfang and Graywhisker were honored by their Clanmates, as were Frostpaw (Frostcloud) and Fangpaw (Fangstrike). Brackenpaw became the deputy, Brackenfoot. Dovepaw’s warrior name was Doveheart. Despite constant injuries, she developed spin-fighting until it was more effective than strike-fighting. Springpaw never grew much but became a wily warrior, Springfur. He fathered a litter of HalfClan kits. (Springfur, Brackenfoot, and Doveheart--who was blind--should still have been kits as of the beginning of this story…? unless more time passed between Autumnpaw's ceremony and the journey than I thought…Springfur is younger than Rivertail, who's the same age as Autumnheart)

(oh hey, ShadowClan was here!)
Mute Rabbitstep was ambushed and killed by a SnowClan patrol. Scarletblaze and Clawstrike became the parents of two litters; their kits were Sunfrost, Rosettefang (I had seen someone on the forums confused on "Russet(fur) vs. rosettes so I made this character), Russetclaw, Leopardtooth, and Snakepaw—Snakepaw was killed in battle. Boneclaw, Bonefur’s son, became deputy after him. Swiftfire was a fierce fighter, eventually killed by SnowClan. Pewterpaw became Pewterpelt. Her sisters became Servalstep and Whitewillow. Nightpaw (Nightcrow) got lost in Twolegplace and joined a band of rogues. ShadowClan never saw him again, but he had plenty of opportunities to reveal himself and chose not to in an attempt to overthrow the vicious Twolegplace leader. (…OH WOW…I put that in the version I gave her, too, didn't I? see, the thing is, in my version of canon, ShadowClan's territory includes Twolegplace, meaning…the Twolegplace leader is Bonestar and that's why Nightcrow never came back wow past me was petty) Servalstep and Rabbitstep’s kits were Snareclaw and Cranefeather. Rabbitstep never met them because they were born the same day he died. Redfall became Pewterpelt’s best friend and helped her with her duties after Stonereed’s death. Bonefur became Bonestar. There were ten Bonestars after him, all descendants. (the sort-of-friend made a big deal out of the eleven Bonestars and I remember writing about them in the epilogue for her version…one was named Bonefeather and originally trained as a medicine cat; one was named Bonewhisker and befriended kittypets, convincing some of them to join the Clan…)

When Snowear died at 17 years old (oh yeah there was always a big deal about how Snowear was ancient and probably immortal but she was just weirdly long-lived for a feral cat), Sorrelpaw—then Sorrelwhisker—took her place, but was killed by SnowClan cats a few years later. Mottlestar made his son Muddyclaw the deputy (nepotism, except also normal Clan functioning), but the warrior died shortly after to be replaced by Shadowpelt. She soon took the name Shadowstar when Mottlestar’s easygoing personality led to an attack by SnowClan, who thought he was making fun of them (um…). Starfire (I didn't know about Teen Titans I promise) and Flamefur became highly respected warriors. Flamefur turned down an offer to be deputy and fathered Streamsky’s kits: Sedgeleaf (blind) and Shyheart (later paralyzed) (why why why is she canon). Streamsky’s unusual gift unlocked secrets, making HailClan powerful but complicated (? she was just strangely perceptive). Bluemink (like the name Nightsilver, I think Bluemink sounds cool but is not a Clan name) had kits with Darkeye: Midnightclaw (Bonestar’s biggest enemy later in life and HailClan’s strongest warrior), Saltspeckle, Brooktail, and Flameclaw. Darkeye was the father of two more litters. Riverpaw’s mentorship was taken over by Starfire and she soon became Rivertail. She had three litters. The first (Springfur’s) (the SnowClan cat) was Zebraspot, Lavaheart, Cloudstripe, and Sunfoot. The second and third litters—with Darkeye—were Dragonblaze, Creeksplash, Sablefoot, Yinkit, Yangkit, Nettlekit, and Skykit. (Yinkit and Yangkit were my sister's characters, obviously based on Hawktalon,'s comic characters but surprisingly not faithful copies, and I gave her kits named Nettlekit and Skykit to make her mad) Creekfoot is one of HailClan’s best warriors, but often goes unnoticed. Autumnheart reluctantly agreed to be Bonestar’s mate, only because she didn’t want him to feel the same way as she did losing Raggedpaw (I could not stand Bonestar; in the Bonestar epilogue I put this as something like "Autumnheart eventually agreed to be Bonestar's mate, but their relationship was tense"); she still misses Raggedpaw, though. Autumnheart’s son Floepatch was a great warrior; his excitable brother Rowanfall, less so, died in a Twoleg trap. Their sister was lost in Twolegplace as an apprentice and trained by ShadowClan; Starlingclaw later returned to HailClan. (there was also a Bonekit, probably Bonefang? who Bonestar insisted on raising from birth and Autumnheart reluctantly let him because she didn't want him making a big deal out of their forbidden relationship)

After Streamsky was killed by Coldstar, Autumnheart became deputy. Shadowstar was killed by ShadowClan cats and Autumnheart became Autumnstar. Although she didn’t lose her kitlike personality, Autumnstar was also skilled, and earned the respect of her Clanmates. She never forgot what she had learned from Wetwhisker. (Wetwhisker was the main villain; read more about her in Three United: Secrets of the Night! yes, I used her in many continuities)

RockClan Calls art (folder "RockClan Calls Mini" and all images created and last modified 5/13/2010)
characters are different because this was an older version

SPOILER: Click to show

HailClan

RainClan

SleetClan

SnowClan

RockClan Calls deaths I remember off the top of my head

SPOILER: Click to show

Saltpaw technically didn't die. While playing hide-and-seek on the docks, some cats boarded a Twoleg boat. It set sail with Saltpaw still on board. She lived a nice life but didn't make it back to the Clans.

Lostpaw either floated away on an ice floe or fell into the icy river and drowned.

Barkpaw sacrificed himself to somehow help his brother Barkpaw/claw across a gorge. He, like, jumped after him and headbutted him in the air?

Like I said, Raggedpaw went sliding off a cliff because he was running in the mountains, excited that he could see their home.

Bluepaw/mink and Autumnpaw/heart (or Bonepaw and his uh did he have a sister? someone? in the Bonestar version) found a snake, and someone was telling them how they knew it wasn't venomous because it didn't have split pupils. However, it did have slit pupils; one of the more experienced apprentices saw the snake and knew it was trouble, but it bit someone. Not sure who.

RockClan Calls comic (folder "RockClan" and first image created and modified 7/4/2012 and last image created and modified 8/20/2012)
badly drawn blood, and Snow's missing eye is kind of gross --- text transcribed in case it is hard to read

SPOILER: Click to show

just a map; apparently the Fourtrees equivalent is called "Stream-crossings" and the Moonstone equivalent is called the "Moon Den"

that's Autumnstar!

white text: prologue
blue narration: Sleet, Snow, Hail, Rain, and Graupel were littermates.
blue narration: They were born in mountains far from the Clans, and traveled together.

red narration: Hail took his strength from physical power; a natural leader, he considered himself above the other four.
white narration: Snow was skillful at hunting unseen, and he fought viciously under pressure.

purple narration: Graupel was alert and agile, the best climber of the five.
blue narration: Rain was clever and wily--proud and daring, she was swift in the water.

gray narration: Sleet was quick and shrewd, and she could weasel her way out of danger.
yellow narration: The brothers and sisters took refuge in a gorge during a terrible storm.

green narration: They were found the next morning by a group of cats that intrigued them…
green narration: SkyClan fascinated them with its code of honor,
green narration: and the rogues left a moon later with plans for a sixth Clan.

ice blue narration: Unfortunately the five fell to fighting.
dark blue narration: Graupel was terribly scarred and Snow's left eye was torn out.
dark gray narration: Sleet finally ended the battle.
gray narration: She didn't win, of course--Rain and Hail were much more powerful--but Sleet was the first to see sense.
gray narration: If there was no way to create a single Clan between the five of them, she reasoned, then why not build five Clans? It would take longer for the Clans to become powerful, but once complete, each Clan would be stronger.
black narration: So five new Clans were created.

red narration: Hail took the area most lush with undergrowth, where he was the only one to fight through easily, and where there were most enemies to drive away.
white narration: Snow preferred a mix of sparse land and thick forests, full of rocks and pitfalls, where nimble cats could hide easily.
blue narration: Rain took the section of forest with the most streams and the wettest ground.
purple narration: Graupel made her home in a ravine, where her strong paws were an advantage.
gray narration: Sleet chose relatively unfrosted hills where she would see any attackers coming before they arrived.
brown narration: StarClan did not watch over these cats. Instead, their ancestors lived in a lush forest: a forest hidden in a valley near the summit of the tallest mountain nearby. RockClan, they were called, for the stone mountains watched over the Clans started by cats who had lived in them.
yellow narration: The five called their less favorable ancestors StormClan, for the storm had driven them to fighting long before, and the Clans should never forget.

white text: chapter one
Bluekit: My name is Scratchstar and I'm old.
Autumnkit: Can I try?
Autumnkit: My name is Scratchstar and my face is weird.
Bluekit: Your turn, Streamkit!
Streamkit: No thanks.
Bluekit: Okay, I'll go again.

Streamkit: Wait, how about this?
Streamkit: My name is Scratchstar and I'm sitting on the Highstone watching the kits.
Bluekit: WHAT!?
Autumnkit's thoughts: I'm just glad I didn't say "ugly."
Scratchstar: Bluekit…Autumnkit…
Mottlepelt: ?
Scratchstar: Kits will be kits. I get it, okay? But soon you'll be apprentices and that kind of behavior won't be tolerated.

white text: *crash*
Scratchstar: Raggedpaw! Darkpaw! I told you to fix the elders' den, not destroy it! Does Shadowpaw have to supervise you again?
Mottlepelt: ???
Scratchstar: Go see if Snowear and Sorrelpaw need any help.

Bluekit: Whoa…
Autumnkit's thoughts: Snowear. They say she's four times as old as Scratchstar. I can't imagine what it would be like to live so long.
Sorrelpaw: …Hi.
Bluekit: Scratchstar sent us here.
Autumnkit's thoughts: Why did Scratchstar have to send us to the medicine den? I don't like it here.

Shadowpaw: SORRELPAW!
Sorrelpaw: Shadowpaw?
Shadowpaw: Raggedpaw got hurt trying to jump over the camp barrier.
Autumnkit's thoughts: Raggedpaw?

Shadowpaw: What in StormClan are you staring at?
Autumnkit: Sorry, Shadowpaw.
Autumnkit's thoughts: I don't like how she's always yelling "StormClan." What if she makes the spirits mad? We're really not supposed to shout "StormClan" when we're angry.

Sorrelpaw: There.
Starpaw: Hey, Sorrelpaw, sorry to bother you… …but Darkpaw just got hurt jumping into the camp.
Shadowpaw: Those stupid toms! Why can't they just do what they're supposed to for once instead of always having to get hurt?
Bluekit: We might want to leave before Shadowpaw yells at us.
Autumnkit's thoughts: Raggedpaw isn't stupid.

Shadowpaw, in italics: Stupid kits, always getting in trouble… Pfft.
Autumnkit: So who wants to be grumpy now?
Streamkit: Ooh! Me!
Bluekit: Me first. My name is Shadowpaw…

white text: chapter two
Bluekit, in italics: Three…two…one…
Bluekit, in a big spiky font: WAKE UP, SCRATCHSTAR!

Scratchstar: Wha--
Scratchstar: Bluekit!
Bluekit: I'm six moons old!
Scratchstar: Oh. Right.
Scratchstar: *yawn*

RockClan Calls Clan banners and symbols in their representative colors

SPOILER: Click to show

GraupelClan

HailClan

RainClan

RockClan

ShadowClan

SleetClan

SnowClan

StormClan

the first attempt (notebook labeled "BONES")

SPOILER: Click to show

(I mentioned handwriting a Bonestar version. This is NOT that! Well, sort of. In sixth grade the friend asked me to write a fanfiction starring Bonestar, so I bought a cute little notebook with cats on it and started writing away. Then I gave up. I believe it was the summer after seventh grade that I was given one of those folder things that has a clear front cover and just three prongs (no pockets). I wrote the Bonestar version of RockClan Calls on notebook paper and stuck it in the folder. This is the initial failed attempt.)

Allegiances

ShadowClan
Leader: Tallstar--dark brown tabby tom with a black mask and a tan underbelly; green eyes (the friend gave me a few characters to use, including this one)
Deputy: Clawfur--cream-and-auburn mottled she-cat with yellow eyes
Medicine Cat: Spottedleaf--brown tortoiseshell she-cat with amber eyes; apprentice, Badgerpaw (Spottedleaf was also "her" character)
Warriors:
Lionfur--tan tom with a fluffy dark stripe down his back
Darkstripe--black tom with brown spots and blue eyes (Darkstripe was also "hers;" no clue why he doesn't have any stripes)
Barleytail--black, white, and brown tom with jade green eyes
Jadefern--pale gray she-cat with jade green eyes
Goldenwhisker--golden she-cat with blue eyes
Dawnblaze--gray tabby she-cat with ice blue eyes
Violetwhisker--black she-cat with blue-violet eyes; apprentice, Redpaw
Silversong--silver she-cat with black stripes and blue eyes; apprentice, Umberpaw
Graydawn--mottled gray tom with amber eyes
Olivedapple--dappled golden brown she-cat with black on her legs and tail and olive green eyes; apprentice, Russetpaw
Twilightpelt--black tom with yellow eyes
Streakfur--vermilion tabby tom with blue-green eyes
Apprentices:
Umberpaw--brown tom
Redpaw--vermilion tabby she-cat
Russetpaw--ginger-and-white she-cat
Badgerpaw--gray tom with a black-and-white striped face
Queens:
Sorrelwhisker--ginger she-cat (Kits: Blackkit, Mistykit, Streamkit, Swiftkit, Moonkit) (I don't remember if "Blackkit" was canon to the final Bonestar version but I don't see any reason he would have been named Blackkit initially because his appearance never changed? Blackkit is Bonestar…I know I did this to spite her)
Patchclaw--calico she-cat (Kits: Pewterkit, Whitekit)
Susanstripe--black-and-yellow she-cat (Kits: Vermilionkit, Nightkit, Servalkit) ("Susan" was supposed to be as in "blackeyed susan" like the flower)
Elders:
Stormeye--gray tabby tom
Whitewhisker--white she-cat

HailClan
Leader: Mottlestar--dark brown mottled tom with a white muzzle (oh hey in this version Scratchstar was already dead)
Deputy: Fangstorm--white tom with a gray stripe on his back
Medicine Cat: Snowear: old square-muzzled white she-cat (look, I messed up the formatting, and I wrote in pen so it wouldn't smudge)

(HailClan ends there--I guess I was originally not going to use the journey plot? I thought it was already "canon" to this universe from the start, but I guess not)

SnowClan
Leader: Clawstar--reddish-brown she-cat
Deputy: Redfoot--red-gold tom

RainClan
Leader: Riverstar--gray tabby tom
Deputy: Graywhisker--gray tom
Warriors:
Goldenheart--golden she-cat

SleetClan
Leader: Canyonstar--reddish brown tom

Cats Outside Clans
Scarclaw--Siamese tom (…did I really stick the Rainingwinds villains in here)
Tigerstep--orange tom with brown stripes (…I did)
Redwhisker--red tabby tom (in Rainingwinds his name was Redsayer)
Silence--silvery brown tabby she-cat (Silentsayer)
Blue--gray-and-white she-cat (Bluesayer, and she looked different)
Thorn--brown tabby she-cat (Thornsayer)
Bramble--dark brown tabby tom (Bramblesayer, and I'll explain Rainingwinds in a later post)

Chapter One

"Trouble!"

Barleytail's mew rang through the clearing as he raced past his son and daughters.

Blackkit tilted his head. Barleytail was a caring father, but he'd raced past his kits without so much as a glance. (I'm struggling through my atrocious handwriting for you guys)

"We ran into that big orange rogue," panted Jadefern.

"He had a brown and white cat with him--"

Jadefern interrupted again. "And a little tabby."

(switches to pencil)

Tallstar looked worried. "We may need to speak about that separate camp. The one… the one in Twolegplace."

The leader turned to Barleytail. "Bad news," the dark tom mewed gravely. "Two of your kits have fallen ill--and so has Sorrelwhisker."

"No!" cried Barleytail. "They have to be okay!" (the change of subject was a little abrupt, but at least Barleytail cares, I guess)

Spottedleaf padded uncertainly from the nursery.

"Badgerpaw?" she called. "I need more catmint!"

The apprentice dashed from the medicine den to the nursery, a bundle of sweet-smelling leaves in his jaws. (why haven't the sick cats been moved out of the nursery)

"It's Streamkit and Swiftkit," Tallstar whispered quickly. "Swiftkit is very sick. Spottedleaf doesn't know if she can heal her."

Barleytail closed his eyes. "My kits…" he moaned.

Blackkit squeaked loudly, "I'm fine, and I'm right here! And guess what?" (I would say "Blackkit don't you care at all" but I know this is because I couldn't stand Bonestar and tried to make him annoying on purpose)

"What?"

"I caught a fox and ate it!" Blackkit boasted.

"Good job." His father's voice was taut with worry.

Blackkit scampered away to find Servalkit.

(I skipped about 15 lines here)

Blackkit scampered away. (yes he just did that) What was Barleytail so worried about? His mate and daughters would be just fine.

Blackkit wasn't quite to the nursery when Streamkit and Moonkit ambushed him. (um, Streamkit is sick, implicitly with greencough)

(I left an entire page blank)

"Ouch!" Blackkit scooted away from his sisters. "Get off of me!"

Pewterkit looked up. It seemed as though her hackles were raised, but the five youngest kits had ridges along their backs. (1. the ridge thing was based on a cat I had for a while, so it is a thing that can happen 2. initially Pewter/White/Serval/Vermilion/Night were all supposed to be littermates, but I made Bonestar part of a litter of five while writing in pen, so I just split up the other litter but didn't take away any of their back ridges)

Pewterkit held the thickest of a maple leaf's veins in her paw, between her claws. She had separated the veins from the rest of the leaf. "Did you know your sisters are sick? Did you know they're going to die?" (Pewterkit be nice)

Blackkit, Streamkit, and Moonkit nodded solemnly. (I guess I forgot that Streamkit was sick and decided it was Mistykit instead…?)

"Pewterkit!" scolded Susanstripe sharply. "Don't ask those awful questions!"

Whitekit, Nightkit, Vermilionkit, and Servalkit were nowhere to be seen.

"Where's Servalkit?" asked Blackkit. (you stopped caring about your sisters pretty quickly didn't you)

Susanstripe had no time to answer; a cry of anguish rang through camp.

"Sorrelwhisker!" hissed Susanstripe, stiffening. The ginger she-cat had given the yowl.

(I guess I started skipping the back of the page once I switched to pencil, because I skipped another page here)

"Mistykit is dead," she wailed. (either I meant for Tallstar to be wrong or Mistykit wasn't even supposed to be sick)

(wait, I think this might be a layered mistake! steps: 1. I drew Swiftfire, Moonfrost, Streamkit, Mistykit, and Bonestar with marker pens in the non-lined front and back pages of the notebook 2. I wrote that Swiftkit and Streamkit were sick 3. I realized I was wrong about one of the sick ones so I made Mistykit sick in place of Streamkit, forgetting that Swiftkit was the one who survived)

Hushed expectation settled itself into the ShadowClan camp. (…why)

"Swiftkit may just recover," reported Spottedleaf. "Mistykit was worse." But Spottedleaf's amber eyes betrayed her.

Sorrelwhisker's yellow eyes flashed. "Listen to the great medicine cat! 'She may just survive!'" she replied hotly.

Blackkit watched, horrified, as Sorrelwhisker stormed out of camp. No! She'll get hurt!

(for what it's worth, when a chapter ended I left the remainder of the page blank and went to the next page to start the next one)

Chapter Two

No! No! No!

Bonekit's mind rejected the knowledge that his mother and sisters were dead. (bad timeskip, worse sentence)

Shortly after Mistykit's death, Sorrelwhisker and Streamkit had died. Only Bonekit, Moonkit, and Swiftkit survived. (well, I guess I eventually remembered Streamkit was the sick one)

Now Swiftkit was sick again. (…or three of them were sick)

Bonekit motioned for Servalkit to follow as he pressed himself into the crack in the nursery's wall. (oh, I moved the secret exit from the HailClan nursery to the ShadowClan nursery, apparently)

The rock gave way, and Bonekit and Servalkit fell into a rectangular stone room.

"Wow," breathed Servalkit.

Bonekit took a moment to remember Sorrelwhisker's last wish: that Blackkit become Bonekit. (what was the point, besides me being petty about her cat being named Bonekit)

Bonekit pushed his way upwards, Servalkit gasping as Bonekit squeezed through the narrow gap up to the forest.

"Wow," she breathed again. "The forest is so big!"

"And soon, I'll be an apprentice," Bonekit boasted.

A crow cawed a loud cry, and a blue jay screeched in reply.

"Susanstripe's going to kill me," Servalkit said, as if it were a big secret.

"Yeah," agreed Bonekit. (okay then)

Servalkit dropped into a crouch, lashed her tail, and leapt clumsily forward. "Look what I caught."

Between her paws was a shiny black beetle."

"Yuck," mewed Bonekit as Servalkit crunched through the beetle.

"I'm going to make Nightkit eat it," she replied. (it's a beetle…by crunching it, you either ate it yourself or destroyed it enough that there won't be anything left for Nightkit)

Bonekit laughed. "We'd better get back." (that was quick)

Chapter Three

"What in StarClan happened to your pelts?" hissed Susanstripe.

Bonekit could hear Servalkit give a weak answer.

"…Bonepaw. Jadefern, you are ready for an apprentice; you will mentor Bonepaw." (why is Susanstripe disciplining her kits during the ceremony)

Tallstar turned to Goldenwhisker. "You will mentor Swiftpaw. Moonpaw, your mentor will be Graydawn."

Jadefern? Jadefern was a young warrior. Goldenwhisker had had two kits--Umberpaw and Russetpaw--and Graydawn was very experienced. But Jadefern!

Servalkit's blue eyes were wide. "Wow, Bonepaw, you're an apprentice already! Nightkit ate the beetle." (no, you either ate or pulverized the beetle)

"Bonepaw?" Jadefern's voice startled him. "Hello? We have to touch noses." Bonepaw lifted his head. (why is Servalkit sitting so close to the apprentices who are having their ceremony right now? kits aren't even invited to ceremonies)

Jadefern stood. "It's too late to show you the border today; go to the apprentices' den."

Bonepaw pushed his way through the ferns.

"That's my nest!" came a growl behind him. Bonepaw turned and saw Umberpaw, teeth bared, glaring at him.

"Well, you can't blame him for not knowing," Redpaw pointed out.

Umberpaw snorted and collapsed into his nest.

"New apprentices sleep on the outside nests,"

(my sister then stole the notebook and drew in pen on the next several pages, as well as quite a few other pages later in the book)

RockClan Calls prologue Darkeye Shadowstar (lone paper torn out of notebook, likely 2008)

SPOILER: Click to show

(okay, I was somewhat wrong earlier!!! in the very first version of the story, the quest started while Autumnstar was still a kit (and not the sister of Bluemink and Streamsky), and the main character was Darkeye, who was an only kit--not sure if Raggedpaw existed as a character yet, but I'm guessing not)

PROLOGUE

The old tom blinked his one eye as a sepia-colored kit with darker face, paws, ears and tail stepped forwards. (details) The grizzled cat looked down at the small one and meowed hoarsely, "Darkkit." (based on my handwriting and the lack of Autumnkit as the main character, this was written in probably 2008, 2009 at the latest)

The sepia cat looked up, round orange eyes blazing. "What?" (you…forgot your ceremony was happening right now)

"Do you promise to defend HailClan, RockClan, and the code--with your life?" Darkkit nodded. "Then from this moment on, until you are a full warrior, you will be called Darkpaw." (this is a pathetic ceremony, and also it's possible "full" isn't supposed to be italicized; I have bad handwriting)

Scratchstar's one-eyed gaze roamed over the many cats in the clearing. It settled on one. "Embersplash will be mentor to Darkpaw." (apparently back in the day Scratchstar was a tom…? also "Scratchstar" is pretty hard to type without making typos)

Embersplash rose. Darkpaw, quivering, stretched up to touch his mentor's nose. Embersplash bent down and let him. (well you'd better) Then Darkpaw padded away and began his first apprentice duties. (even if we accept that this is standard, shouldn't Embersplash at least tell him what to do first?)

CHAPTER ONE

Streampaw twitched in her sleep. Beside her, six apprentices were stretched.

But Shadowpaw was awake. She couldn't shake off the feeling that the seven were in terrible danger. When she finally did fall asleep

RockClan Calls universe art

SPOILER: Click to show

I am NOT including MOST of the art that has to do with characters only mentioned in the epilogue!!! Although I will explain the later "story," I'm not really counting that, for the most part.

Coldstar had a "signature" attack: he would make a big scratch beneath his opponent's right eye. He made sure to leave deep, noticeable scars so that everyone would see how many cats he personally had wounded. This is him scarring Mottlestar of HailClan.

Bonestar IV. I think this one was Bonefeather?

And knowing me this one was probably Bonewhisker.

Canonically Autumnstar and Bonestar had a fraught relationship because Autumnstar did not like Bonestar in any sense of the word. Bonestar demanded to be able to raise one of his children. Apparently no one found it suspicious that one of Autumnheart's kits was named Bonekit and looked almost exactly like the ShadowClan leader. No one, that is, except for the amazingly perceptive Streamsky, who figured out her sister's deep and well-kept secret! Anyway, this is Bonestar meeting his kits and choosing Bonekit as the kit he wanted to raise in ShadowClan.

I think Bonestar I was named Bonefur and Bonestar II was named Boneclaw, though I could have that backward…
Boneclaw: Vinestar!
Vinestar: Yes, Boneclaw.
Boneclaw: Leafheart…
Leafheart: With this life I give you compassion.

Coldstar being threatening. I forgot his design was based on Kimba.

Doveheart, the blind warrior of SnowClan who was just a little too young to go on the journey.

I probably should have rotated this, but who really cares? Brackenfoot, Doveheart's littermate.

Frozenclaw, Coldstar's sister.

later game

SPOILER: Click to show

This will be a mess, just so you know.

At the very beginning, Mottlestar was still leader. Shadowpelt was deputy. Although she was a jerk in her apprentice days, she matured a lot on and after the journey.

Side note: her siblings Starfire (I didn't know about Teen Titans) and Flamefur were good warriors. For a while Flamefur was deputy. Eventually both Starfire and Flamefur retired. I don't remember if either of them had any kits, but I kind of feel like I would have remembered if they had?

The main game centered around Rivertail (Ashtail's main character) and Autumnheart (Fishfeather's main character), with me as the majority of other characters.

Rivertail was a blue-eyed silver tabby and kittypet with white ears/paws/underbelly/tail tip/etc. who joined HailClan. I think Bluemink was the one who got her to join. She was about Blue/Autumn/Stream's age, so she was old enough to be a warrior, but she was briefly an apprentice (don't remember whose) to catch up on the skills she didn't learn as a kittypet.

Coldstar of RainClan and his sister, Frozenclaw, the deputy, kept inciting battles in the water, where RainClan outclassed HailClan. They never got territory from this, even though they almost always won.

Rivertail ended up "falling in love" with the SnowClan cat Springfur (just barely younger than her and Autumnheart). She even fathered his kits. I think the first litter wound up being Zebraspots, Cloudstripe, Lavaheart, and Sunfoot. Sunfoot eventually found out he was HalfClan. Either he or Rivertail ended up telling Mottlestar and Snowear (old medicine cat). Snowear did eventually die, and Sorrelwhisker succeeded her.

However, it's kind of surprising that she stayed with him, because even when they were apprentices, Springpaw was involved in SnowClan's winter raids on HailClan. Multiple times, he distracted Riverpaw either by talking or by fighting. There were also instances of him luring her and her friends onto SnowClan territory, where they were "caught" by SnowClan warriors. Ashtail just never picked up on the fact that Springfur wasn't a good guy.

His brother Brackenfoot eventually became SnowClan deputy. Brackenfoot had a crush on Rivertail but hated the idea of forbidden relationships. Ashtail didn't like Brackenfoot, so eventually Rivertail brutally murdered him. (After he died I told Ashtail that Brackenfoot had liked Rivertail. She tried to take back killing him. I kept him dead.) Brackenfoot and Springfur's sister was Doveheart, and she was blind. She spun while fighting like Gregor the Overlander.

Darkeye and Bluemink had kits named Midnightclaw, Flameclaw, Brooktail, and Saltspeckle. Saltspeckle was named for the Saltpaw who was lost on the boat on the apprentice journey. Midnightclaw was a good fighter who eventually became the strongest cat in all the Clans. Saltspeckle was petty and just a big jerk. She somehow did something that got Brooktail and Flameclaw in huge trouble, thereby getting their warrior ceremony delayed for two moons while Saltspeckle and Midnightclaw had theirs that night. Brooktail was kind of whiny and unlikable too. Flameclaw was initially a nobody, but at some point he became my dad's character, and somehow my dad thought he was supposed to be a log, so Flameclaw became…a very strange cat.

Creekfoot was another of Ashtail's characters. When Rivertail's second litter (with Darkeye this time) became apprentices, Creekfoot mentored Creekpaw, who eventually became Creeksplash. The other kits in Rivertail's second litter were Dragonblaze (a nobody but supposed to be tough) and Sablefoot (uuuuuuuuuugggggggggghhhhh you could write a YA trilogy about Sablefoot). Dragonkit, Sablekit, and Creekkit spent a lot of time sneaking out of camp through the hole described in the Bonestar story above.

Autumnheart was Midnightclaw's mentor. "I was your apprentice. I taught you everything I know" and "I was your mentor. You taught me everything you knew" became our jokes.

Autumnheart had kits who grew up to be Starlingclaw, Rowanfall, and Floepatch (floe as in ice floe). Ashtail had a character named Snowsomething and there was some plot with Rowanfall saving the Snow- cat from a fox trap like the ones in TNP. Other than that, Rowanfall was kind of goofy and pathetic. It made him easy to kill off later.

Meanwhile, Streamsky's kits were Shyheart and Sedge…something. Sedgefur? Sedgefur was blind. Saltspeckle somehow tricked Shyheart into falling out of a tree and breaking her back. She dragged herself around like Briarlight for a little while and then died. Sedgefur(?) had close to a forbidden relationship with the blind RainClan medicine cat, Crowflight. They would pretend to be part of MidnightClan, where all cats lived in the dark and no one used their sense of sight at all.

The Clan was getting too big, so I killed off some cats, but Ashtail was mad, so they didn't stay dead. This included Streamsky and Bluemink.

Sablefoot had a thing for the medicine apprentice, Blazingtail, who was also Ashtail's character. Streamsky was soooo perceptive that she actually noticed this!!! At some point Sablefoot and Blazingtail had kits, but I don't remember them at all.

However, after a while, there was some fight between Frozenclaw and Rivertail in the water. Frozenclaw was winning, but Rivertail somehow got a venomous snake to bite the RainClan deputy. Frozenclaw died. Coldstar came to her rescue as Streamsky arrived to back up Rivertail. Rivertail tried to jam the snake's fangs into Coldstar, but somehow he pulled Streamsky into the way, and Streamsky died. This was my way of punishing Ashtail for killing Frozenclaw, because I really liked Frozenclaw. She screamed at me for killing off Streamsky. Oh well! She told me I could bring back Frozenclaw if I brought back Streamsky. Not happening. Bye!

At some point Rivertail had a third litter. I genuinely don't remember whether it was with Springfur or Darkeye, but I think it was Springfur. Ashtail had characters named Yinkit and Yangkit, so I added ones named Skykit and Nettlekit. We abandoned these characters. Surprisingly, although Yinkit and Yangkit were "inspired by" Hawktalon,'s characters, they were not exactly the same. They were solid black and solid white respectively; Yinkit was a pathetic tom, and Yangkit was a mean girl she-cat. Skykit and Nettlekit were nobodies.

ShadowClan was retconned into the setting. Bonestar was retconned as the father of Autumnheart's kits. Starlingclaw was lost in Twolegplace, which contained part of ShadowClan's territory, and ShadowClan kidnapped her. Boneclaw was retconned in as Autumnheart's fourth kit she had been forced to give up (because the eleven Bonestars had to be canon). Streamsky was the only cat who knew Autumnheart and Bonestar were together, but some cats found out during the mission to rescue Starlingclaw.

Midnightclaw and Bonestar tried to kill each other many times. Realistically in a one-on-one Midnightclaw was the better fighter, but you can't just kill off someone else's character who also happens to have been turned into the main villain for your own purposes! (Hawkflight had no idea that Bonestar was a villain in our version of continuity…)

Ashtail and I had kittypet characters named Barley(paw) and Wheat(paw), respectively, join HailClan. Wheatpaw put herself into her training and did pretty well, though she was naturally somewhat weak. Barleypaw, on the other hand, did nothing but whine. According to Ashtail, Barleypaw was treated incredibly unfairly. The kicker is that I, as Shadowstar, was about to give both of them their warrior names and then Barleypaw threw a tantrum right there because Ashtail didn't think I was giving Barleypaw a warrior name, so of course that delayed his ceremony…

Micapaw/fleck of RainClan flirted with Barleypaw in the river, and he saw it as a forbidden relationship, though Micafleck saw it as a joke. The RainClan medicine apprentice, Gravelpaw, tried to warn Barleypaw away, but Barleypaw kept attacking him, which attracted RainClan warriors to the spot to drive Barleypaw away many times. Eventually Barleypaw brutally murdered Gravelpaw for telling him to get out of RainClan territory when Barleypaw was trespassing. Shadowstar uneasily made him a warrior to get him to stop acting out.

Shadowstar died, and Autumnstar became leader. That's pretty much where the game stopped, though Ashtail definitely introduced a cat named Beaverpaw, and I think I made a RainClan apprentice who was completely oblivious to Beaverpaw's crush on her.

links to "inspiration"

SPOILER: Click to show

I don't want to post other people's art here, but I can link you to it. These are pictures I have saved in a folder from 2010, and I ran them through TinEye to find the links.

Coldstar: photobucket.com/gallery/user/beckyiss25/media/bWVkaWFJZDoyMTUyOTIwNw==/?ref=
I later gave him black ear tips, but the look in this cat's eyes was the inspiration for Coldstar. I believe this was fanart of Cloudtail.

Streamsky: t02.deviantart.net/H5x-s5oBqsl4en-3LnRpXrwbhmM=/fit-in/700x350/filters:fixed_height%28100%2C100%29:origin%28%29/pre00/1777/th/pre/f/2009/188/2/e/silverstream_by_reaper_neko.png
Silverstream. I designed Streamsky while thinking about this picture rather than looking at it, but you can see how I got what I did.

Autumnstar, Bluemink, Darkeye: photobucket.com/gallery/user/masultz/media/bWVkaWFJZDoxMTEzMDYzMg==/?ref=
Autumnstar is based on the Fireheart in the top left. Bluemink is based on the Bluestar in the bottom middle. Darkeye is based on the Dustpelt in the bottom right.

Flamefur was based on another Firestar fanart, in which Firestar is somewhat darker than he's usually drawn, has tabby stripes, and is looking to the left in almost-profile. TinEye cannot find the image, probably because I took a screenshot of just the face instead of saving the whole image.

Shadowstar was based on fanart as well, and TinEye cannot find this picture either. I'm guessing this image is of Jayfeather, because the picture is of a sullen gray cat with faint tabby stripes, light dull blue eyes, and some fluff on top of the head and around the neck/chest. Shadowstar's design changed over time to be what you see in the comic above.

I can post the Starfire image here since it was official art! She's based on this cat:

update art 7/1 and 7/4

SPOILER: Click to show

created and last modified 7/7/12

Autumnpaw and Raggedpaw on a beach. These pictures were the "official" pictures that I drew of every single cat mentioned in the Bonestar story and emailed to my friend (just so there was no way she could picture them differently than I did). I liked these two and put them in this image. It was very strongly disliked by the other Art Forumers. Oh well. Joke's on them; here it is again.

created and last modified 6/23/12

This is supposed to be Autumnpaw, but I guess I either forgot her official design or changed it for a while?

created and last modified 6/26/12

Mottlestar. This was the last straw for the Art Forum pretending to like my art. I think this was the first picture I ever posted that got no positive comments while still getting plenty of negative comments? Maybe it was the one after this? Anyway, yeah, not well received. Too bad!

created and last modified 5/27/12 until today when I covered my name

The jade green blob is where I had my real full name. This was the cover I printed out to use for the Bonestar version of the story.

drawn on the last day of fifth grade; file created 9/22/10 which was about when I learned to use the scanner

I got fancy markers and pencils on the last day of elementary school and immediately set to work on this drawing. The white corner is where I put my real full name. Although the other person's art is much better, I think you can really see the influence of that Firestar fanart on her design in this drawing!

Not sure if Nightfur is a separate character or an alternate ending for Nightcrow. Others are straightforward. In case you can't read it, though, top left is Nightfur pinning down Whitewillow; top right is Moonkit; bottom left is Bonestar and Autumnheart; and bottom right is Midnightclaw.

Genderqueer

tiger beetle

Warrior Fanatic

=^ò.ó^=

Pronouns: all (default they)

other old fanfictions update 7/4 Jun 15, 2017 21:11:40 GMT -5 wadevvilson likes this

Quote

Post by tiger beetle on Jun 15, 2017 21:11:40 GMT -5

Broken Glass (document "Broken Glass" created 10/22/2011, last modified 1/12/2014)
but I know the story didn't last three years so I must have edited it for some reason

SPOILER: Click to show

(there was a code here for a banner or a cover, which was probably a badly done drawing of Shardwhisker with broken glass "covering" the image, but the tinypic link no longer works)

This image frankly baffles me, because Shardwhisker is not and has never been a black cat. He was a "dark gray tabby" that I pictured as a smoke tabby, and in the serval version (which I think was the original) he was for some reason a dark smoky gray-brown. I don't…get it?

Don't stop reading just because of what he says in Chapter Three. I promise, it gets better. (well that's promising)

95%; Broken Glass is a wonderful story. Follow the trials a rogue faces as he struggles to fit in with his new Clan. Hollyfrost14 of StoneClan writes a fabulous, intriguing piece that will have you nodding in understanding and blinking in sympathy. You can really feel the writing and see the characters, real as life. This is definitely a read-on sort of story!
~(removed reviewer's name because hey this isn't a smear campaign)

ALLEGIANCES
_{Not every cat is listed. I know the designs are unrealistic…} (again, so promising)

CloudClan
Leader: Goldenstar--dark golden tabby tom with a long, plumed tail and golden eyes
Deputy: Spottedtail--pale yellowish tom with black stripes, black ears, black spots, black tail rings, white dots on the back of his ears, a white muzzle, white paws, and a white underbelly; amber eyes. (get it he looks like a serval)
Medicine Cat: Snowleaf--white she-cat with amber eyes and a distinctive silvery-gray flame-shaped splash on her chest. The bottoms of her paws are blue-gray.
Warriors:
Clawstorm--gray tabby tom with wild fur and hazel eyes (wasn't there a Clawstorm in RC too)
Finchwhisker--golden she-cat with black and white patches and yellow eyes
Patchfeather--black-and-white tom with yellow-green eyes
Swiftsong--black she-cat with a ginger ear and white patches
Heathercloud--white she-cat with light brown patches and heather-colored eyes; apprentice, Silverpaw
Brackentail--dark brown tabby tom with golden eyes
Bramblewhisker--light brown tom with dark brown marbled tabby stripes and blue eyes; apprentice, Oakpaw
Peachfur--cream-colored she-cat with blue eyes
Spottedtalon--tortoiseshell she-cat with midnight blue eyes (there's already a Spottedtail in the same Clan)
Speckleclaw--small speckled tom
Apprentices:
Oakpaw--small longhaired brown tabby tom
Silverpaw--slender silver tabby and white she-cat
Queens:
Auburntail--chestnut she-cat with a dark tail tip and dark ears [mother of Patchfeather's kits: Dewkit, Cloudkit, and Falconkit]
Elders:
Quailtuft--dark brown mottled she-cat with black ears

StreamClan
Leader: Pinestar--brown tabby tom with light green eyes
Deputy: Blackstorm--black tom with gray spots and yellow eyes
Medicine Cat: Sagefeather--gray and white tom with dark amber eyes
Warriors:
Amberflight--russet-colored she-cat with brown on her ear tips, under her eyes, on the bottom of her tail, and on her back legs from the ankles down. Front feet are white on the bottom. Amber eyes (Thanks, ~Moonsplash~!) (was there a contest or something???)
Cyanlily--small white she-cat with a long tail and cyan blue eyes

LeafClan
Leader: Icestar--white she-cat with amber eyes
Deputy: Wolfwhisker--gray-and-white tom with blue eyes
Medicine Cat: Stormfeather--dark smoky gray tabby tom with blue eyes
Warriors:
Brightstone--bright ginger and silver she-cat with bright yellow eyes

ShadeClan (imaginative)
Leader: Willowstar--pale gray she-cat with light blue eyes
Deputy: Beewhisker--golden tabby she-cat with yellow eyes
Medicine Cat: Panthercloud--black she-cat with amber eyes
Warriors:
Runningstream--slender black she-cat
Swiftcloud--black and white tom

BreezeClan
Leader: Pebblestar--mottled gray tabby she-cat with hazel eyes
Deputy: Songfeather--dark swirled tortoiseshell she-cat with midnight blue eyes
Medicine Cat: Leafwhisker--pale yellow tabby and white she-cat with green eyes
Warriors:
Roseleaf--calico she-cat with green eyes
Taluspelt--brown tom with white paws and amber eyes
Darkstorm--black tom with green eyes
Duskfeather--gray tabby and white she-cat with blue eyes
Umberfoot--brown tom with amber eyes
Winterheart--silver tabby she-cat with ice blue eyes
Redclaw--dark ginger tom with white forepaws and green eyes

Apprentices: (I don't know what that line break is doing)
Whisperpaw--pale gray she-cat with light green eyes

Cats Outside of Clans
Shardwhisker--dark gray tabby tom with white on his muzzle, paws, chest, and underbelly; very white whiskers (I don't know why I decided he should have a two-part name before it started, but I guess I did)

PROLOGUE
Alone and Proud (the chapter title alone is embarrassing enough that I regret this already)

Shardwhisker's pelt prickled. He knew something was wrong before he even saw anything unusual. Even so, he narrowed his yellow eyes and prepared to pounce. It would not get away. He would not miss.

The black tom leaped forward, catching the sparrow neatly as the rest of them fluttered off, shaking dust from their wings. He almost hoped the Clan cats were watching him. It would be awful if all his time perfecting the sparrowlaunch went to waste. What good was it to be a lone showoff if there was no one to show off to?

That didn't really bother him, though. Shardwhisker was fine with remaining unseen. He was strong--kind of. Much stronger than those lazy, overfed Siamese cats who sometimes explored the woods outside of Clan territory. But the Clan cats were stronger--he knew it from experience.

The scar on his shoulder seemed to scream now, as three cats charged down the slope, leaping back and forth as they bounded to the beach, as if their paws were drawn to the right places. The patrol leader, black and yellow, had given him that scar seasons ago. Shardwhisker couldn't wait to repay him, but now was not the time. (well, he was hoping they were watching)

Then the spotted cat yowled, "Give that back!"

"No."

"I said, give it back!" commanded the spotted cat.

Shardwhisker placed his paw over the sparrow, unsheathing his claws. "It's mine. I caught it." He forced himself to keep his voice cool.

"Give it back!" he yowled. "Don't think I don't remember you!" The spotted cat launched himself at Shardwhisker, who snatched the sparrow and hared away, the three Clan cats pursuing him until he made it out of CloudClan territory, through neutral territory, and into BreezeClan territory.

"You're hunting for BreezeClan?" The spotted cat narrowed his amber eyes. "This I can't believe. Next time I will catch you, rogue, and then you'll wish you'd never been born!"

Hunting for BreezeClan? Shardwhisker thought as the three CloudClan cats stormed away. What a laugh! They're Clan cats--fierce, powerful... united. Me, on the other hand... I'm alone, and that's just the way I like it. (oh shut up Shardwhisker)

CHAPTER ONE
The Cat with Fuzzy Ears

Where am I?

Shardwhisker had thought he knew every part of the forest. Yet here before him was a clearing he'd never seen. It was full of strange plants--what were they?

"Greetings."

Shardwhisker whirled around. A cat similar to the spotted one who'd chased him, but with darker fur and fuzzier ears, was watching him. (did…did the serval version come first? I thought that was my attempt at making it an original story after the fact)

"It's good to see you, Shardwhisker."

"Who are you?" Shardwhisker challenged. (no he didn't challenge shut up)

"My name is not important. I bring a message for you," the strange cat meowed in a deep voice. He probably thought that explanation would satisfy Shardwhisker.

"Why should I listen?" he growled. "And--wait--how do you know my name?"

"Will you just," the spotted cat growled back, then roared, "STOP INTERRUPTING ME!?" (go away Kestrelstar)

"Yes," Shardwhisker mewed meekly. "Sorry."

The spotted cat narrowed his eyes. "You'd better be."

"You can go on."

The other cat nodded. "Okay! I bring a message for you." He was happy again. He's odd, Shardwhisker thought. "You need to change your ways."

Shardwhisker waited, but he didn't say anything more. "That's it?"

"It's going to be hard," warned the cat with fluffy ears. "You're pretty set in your ways. Well? Am I wrong?"

"N-no," Shardwhisker mewed quickly. "But if it's my destiny I'll end up changing somehow. So thanks--but please, no more messages. I only need to do what's going to happen anyway, so please don't bother me with messages. Okay?" (he has a point)

"Well, looks like someone's going to MoonClan instead of SunClan," muttered the fuzzy-eared spotted cat with the deep voice. "Telling SunClan what to do... but all right, if that's how you want it," he mewed, brightening up. (I guess SC=SC and MC=DF)

"Wait--you were a warrior?"

"Kestrelstar," the fuzzy-eared tom meowed, "deputy to Cloudstar... in other words, Shardwhisker, the second leader of CloudClan."

"What?" Shardwhisker yowled in outrage. "CloudClan?" But his dream-world was already fading away. (what did you think he was going to say!?)

Chapter Two
Rescue Mission

The High Cliff! They never patrol there! (then why don't you always hunt there? were you serious when you wanted to be seen)

Shardwhisker changed course and headed for the highest point at the cliff that divided the sandy lake beach and the forest above.

Today, though, something was different.

Shardwhisker couldn't tell what. He almost turned back, the way he should have a quarter moon ago, when he'd pounced on the sparrow. (oh hey it's a time skip)

Then he heard it: the terrified squeaking of a kit. (wow how lucky that he came here today!!!)

Shardwhisker's reaction was so quick he couldn't tell whether it was his instinct or his heart, or even just to show off: he bounded up the cliff, scattering scree down behind him as he used pawholds that were...not the best he'd seen. (who cares) In a flash, he'd snatched from the cliff one, two, three kits, and placed them on the ground. (…did he make three trips or does he have a really big mouth) He quickly scanned the kits: a chestnut marbled tabby tom, a white she-kit with marbled blue-gray tabby spots, and a pale gray she-kit with white patches. None were hurt.

"Who are you?" the tom squeaked. "You don't smell like a CloudClan cat."

"I'm not a CloudClan cat," agreed Shardwhisker.

"You saved us!" cheered the mostly-white she-kit.

"What's your name?" squeaked the other she-kit.

Shardwhisker almost lied, but something made him say his real name. "Shardwhisker."

"What is going on here?" growled a voice.

Oh, no. Shardwhisker scrambled away from the voice and away from the cliff, hoping he could get down again. He didn't want to face this cat.

It was the spotted cat again--and not the one from his dream. (what a surprise)

CHAPTER THREE
The Path Begins (the hero's journey is not chapter title advice)

Before Shardwhisker could answer, the pale gray and white she-kit bounced around the spotted cat's paws. "He saved me!"

"Dewkit?" the spotted tom mewed. "What were you doing out here?"

"'Splorin'," muttered the tom kit.

"And Falconkit and Cloudkit? What on earth--but he..." The spotted cat looked confused.

"We were playing," squeaked Cloudkit. "And then--uh--then a big badger came and threw us and we grabbed the cliff and he saved us!"

The spotted tom sighed. "This is not happening," he moaned. "This is not happening." (shut up Spottedtail)

"What?" Shardwhisker meowed.

The spotted cat turned to face him. "You really rescued those kits?"

"I couldn't let them fall," Shardwhisker meowed.

"Well, SunClan told us..." He sighed, then continued. "They were sending a sign of some kind. And this is the closest thing to a sign we've had. Could be a coincidence, but Goldenstar would kill me if I didn't do something now." (to be fair, you could probably get away with chasing him off right now)

His amber eyes seemed to bore into Shardwhisker's pelt. They blazed with rage. Then the meaning sank in.

Suddenly, Shardwhisker knew what he had to do. You need to change your ways... "All right, admit it. You think I have to join your Clan. And you know what I say? I will. I'm tired of being the enemy here. I'll join your Clan, and maybe then I can eat a sparrow without running for my life."

"Yay!" cheered Cloudkit.

But she was the only one. (what, the other kits don't care? also is this the thing I warned people not to stop reading over…?)

CHAPTER FOUR
Golden Opportunity (…I didn't) (I did)

"What is it?" called a voice from under the stone.

"A rogue. Says he's going to join the Clan. He saved the kits."

"Saved the kits!" A white she-cat darted out of the hole. "Is it the sign?"

"He never said the sign would mean a good thing," the spotted tom growled. "I take this to mean he's going to see a lot of danger with us--which means we'll see trouble if he joins!"

"Oh, Spottedtail, he saved the kits. How can that mean anything bad? Hi--what's your name? Never mind, I'll learn it later. I'm Snowleaf, the CloudClan medicine cat. I assume Spottedtail has told you about the sign? Yes? He's the Clan deputy, you know, so he's got some say around here." Oh, no...deputy!? Snowleaf grinned and then flicked her ears back. "Kind of busy after the kits messed up my herb stacks. 'Bye!" She shot back into the hole. (oh no I remember this plot point now)

Oh...kay...

"Come on," Spottedtail growled. "We have to go see Goldenstar."

"Okay," Shardwhisker replied, wary. I wonder if Goldenstar hates me, like Spottedtail. Or maybe he talks a lot, like Snowleaf... I don't know what got into me. Why did I agree to come here? I don't belong in a Clan! I suppose it's what Kestrelstar meant. But then why tell me? Maybe it would only happen if he told me, so I'd make that decision...or maybe it’s just that it was his destiny to tell me. Shardwhisker finally cleared his mind as they climbed through more rocks. The pond lapped over a few of them, and Shardwhisker couldn't help wondering one last thing: Does it ever flood? (I…don't think that's a plot point? and therefore it's not important)

"Spottedtail?" came a voice from a small cave, made by rocks that lay over one another.

"Goldenstar. Snowleaf thinks this rogue must join the Clan."

"I'm a loner," Shardwhisker growled, and stepped inside the cave. Spaces between rocks let light stream in, like Jacob's-ladders in the clouds. (I was just showing off that I knew a name for them)

"Hello. What is your name?" Goldenstar sounded curious, not prying.

"Shardwhisker."

Goldenstar nodded. "You want to be a warrior?"

Shardwhisker almost refused. He wished he could. But that would mean trying to run from his destiny, and Shardwhisker had a feeling it would catch up to him...and that it would be much less pleasant if he didn't accept his role as Clan cat. "I suppose," he finally muttered. Why did his destiny have to lie with the Clan? Why couldn't he be on his own to change his ways?

"All right. I shall announce you to the Clan. But first--how old are you?"

"Eighteen moons old," he replied automatically. Shrewbrain! Why didn't you lie? (okay while scrolling to get this part onto the page I read "shrewbrain" as "lesbian" and I thought you guys should know that)

"Then first you'll need a mentor. You're old enough to be a warrior, but why take the chance of looking like a fool in front of the Clan if you don't know, say, the tail signals? So just get trained, and then you'll be perfectly ready for the warrior's life."

Spottedtail lashed his tail. "No! He can't join CloudClan!"

Goldenstar regarded him through half-closed eyes. "I believe, Spottedtail, that I am leader of this Clan. I make the final decision. Go help Auburntail with her kits. Then gather with the rest of the Clan." (okay I appreciate Goldenstar's sass but also he needs to shut up)

CHAPTER FIVE
The Opportunity Fades

"Let all cats old enough to catch their own prey join beneath Cloud Rock for a Clan meeting!" (Cloud Rock)

Shardwhisker had figured out that the leader's den was in the Cloud Cave, and a path, which you could only get to from the Cloud Cave--Cloud Path--led to the top of a long, thin rock that pointed straight at the place where Cloudstar was said to have fought his last battle: the top of the Cloud Pine. (this was based on a very, very small version of what's described, minus the cave…I called it "Arrow Peak" and "Arrow Pass" though)

Shardwhisker had nearly gathered with the Clan cats, but instead Goldenstar had beckoned with his tail. "You're coming onto Cloud Rock with me." Shardwhisker had followed him; he was afraid the leader would order CloudClan to attack if he didn't follow orders. (you know, if I followed "show, don't tell," this could be halfway decent characterization)

"We are gathered today," Goldenstar meowed, "to welcome a new member into our Clan. Shardwhisker, please come forward."

Shardwhisker carefully climbed the stone until he was just behind Goldenstar. The CloudClan leader looked perfectly comfortable on the narrow perch, but Shardwhisker clung to the stone, afraid he would be blown away by the wind.

"SunClan told Snowleaf they would send a sign of what to do in the future. She, Spottedtail, and I agree that the sign has come. While Dewkit, Cloudkit, and Falconkit were exploring today," he paused to cut his gaze toward the kits, narrowing his eyes, then continued, "this loner found them dangling from the High Cliff. He immediately saved them; all three kits agree on what happened. We agree that this rogue should join our Clan. I cannot take an apprentice right now, as I am busy with matters over border--LeafClan and BreezeClan have both been scented on our territory--so the cat of next-highest rank will train Shardwhisker, so that he learns Clan techniques and will fit in more. Spottedtail will be Shardwhisker's mentor."

"What?" Shardwhisker and Spottedtail spoke at the same time, a yowl of outrage. (yeah seriously Goldenstar I know you like SunClan and all but this was a bad idea)

"You heard me," Goldenstar meowed calmly. "I am too busy debating borders with Pebblestar and Icestar; Snowleaf is a medicine cat. Although the warriors could easily train him, it is not the skill he lacks, but the technique. Who better than the deputy to teach him that?"

"Goldenstar, I can't train him!" yowled Spottedtail.

"I refuse to be his apprentice!" Shardwhisker hissed.

"If you don't cooperate, that's fine with me," Goldenstar meowed, an air of indifference. "But you, Spottedtail, will be to blame for any mistakes he makes... and you, Shardwhisker, will be held responsible for the prey you scare off. All right, the meeting is over." He leaped over Shardwhisker, lower on the Cloud Rock. Shardwhisker watched him go, furious that the cat who'd given him his scar, the cat who'd attacked him over a sparrow, the cat who'd tried to kill him--that this cat was now his mentor. (it's been like four short chapters since you told us all of that; you don't have to recap it)

CHAPTER SIX
Failure (at least some thought went into the pun title! this is just one word!)

"You call that hunting?" Spottedtail was unimpressed. (was he really)

"Of course I call it hunting! It's nothing like those ridiculous leaps you Clan cats do. How do you manage to feed yourselves?" Shardwhisker spat.

Spottedtail sighed. "We listen to our mentors. Unlike rogues." (I really went ham with the italics didn't I)

Shardwhisker almost lashed out at his mentor, but caught himself just in time. That would have been going back to his old life, and apparently he wasn't allowed to do that. I hate Kestrelstar.

"Now watch me." Spottedtail ducked close to the ground--way too close, Shardwhisker thought--and began to creep forward. Shardwhisker watched him go and nonchalantly swished his tail, pleased when the ferns rattled behind him. Spottedtail sprang at the mouse with his claws outstretched and--

Missed.

"What was that for?" Spottedtail hissed. "That could have fed the kits!"

Oops. "Sorry." Shardwhisker's pleasure melted. He was glad to get even with Spottedtail, but the kits were different. Shrewbrain! (I guess the different animal was supposed to demonstrate that he had a slightly different upbringing than a Clan cat?)

Spottedtail echoed his thoughts: "I thought you liked the kits. You're such a mouse-brain, Shardwhisker. Think before you scare away the prey just to make me mad."

"I said sorry!" Shardwhisker snapped.

"Sorry catches no prey!" growled Spottedtail. "I'm hunting alone. You can watch quietly, or sit here. It's all up to you."

Shardwhisker flattened his ears and narrowed his eyes as the CloudClan deputy stalked off. Then he turned and padded away. I'll show him how to catch prey!

He recalled everything he'd practiced: the sparrowlaunch, the mouse pounce, the way to hear a vole. He finally found prey.

A rabbit!

Shardwhisker thought for a moment, then decided to pretend it was a giant sparrow. He'd pounce on top of it and bite it.

He crept closer, his back arched and his tail stiff. His whiskers quivered. He focused all his energy and attention on the rabbit. Shardwhisker lowered his head, bared his teeth, and pounced, unsheathing his claws in midair.

He landed in the grass. Shardwhisker leaped to his paws and raced after the rabbit, haring away through the woods. He chased the runaway prey, his paws pounding on the hard ground. Closer... closer... now! Shardwhisker pounced.

Ouch. It hurt to run into a bramble bush. (wow) The rabbit was out of sight now, racing through a small tunnel under the bush.

"Ready to learn how to hunt now?" growled Spottedwhisker from nearby. "Or are you hoping to drop the bramble bush on the fresh-kill pile today?"

"Fine," Shardwhisker muttered. His paws and face stung. "I'll listen this time."

CHAPTER SEVEN
The Challenge

Goldenstar wasn't in his den. (two chapters ago Goldenstar implied he actually had stuff to do in terms of borders and/or inter-Clan relations)

It was evening, the full moon just above the horizon, the sunlight long faded. Shardwhisker had to ask Goldenstar a question. (oh well I guess that's fair)

Shardwhisker sniffed around for a few minutes, then found the most recent scent trail. He was just about to follow it up the Cloud Path when Goldenstar yowled, "Let all cats old enough to catch their own prey join beneath Cloud Rock for a Clan meeting!" (? Shardwhisker didn't notice Goldenstar up there before he went in?)

Shardwhisker turned and padded out of the Cloud Cave and sat with the Clan. It had been almost a quarter moon since he'd joined CloudClan. He tried to identify the warriors around him. He knew Spottedtalon and Swiftsong were the two black, ginger, and white she-cats, but he couldn't remember which was tortoiseshell and which was just patched. Clawstorm and Speckleclaw stood out--a wild-furred tabby and a small multicolored one. He recognized Bramblewhisker by his unusual coloring and Peachfur since she was the only cream-colored cat. He knew there was someone in the Clan called Brackentail, but he couldn't figure out which cat matched the name. Snowleaf sat by the edge of the clearing, whispering something to herself in rapid speech--that was probably how a talking mouse would act. (wow look at that amazing characterization of Snowleaf)

"Tonight is the night of the Gathering," Goldenstar meowed. Which is...? "I will be taking Spottedtail, Snowleaf, Swiftsong, Patchfeather, Brackentail, Bramblewhisker, Clawstorm, Finchwhisker, Oakpaw, and Silverpaw. Quailtuft, you may come if you wish."

"I will," Quailtuft rasped.

"Shardwhisker, you will come as well." Goldenstar bounded down the slanted rock, through his cave, and around the pond. "I trust you know what the Gathering is?"

"Yes," Shardwhisker lied. At least, I hope I can do this right...

"Good." Goldenstar waved his plumed tail. The cats he'd named before gathered behind him; Shardwhisker scrambled to join them. Goldenstar whisked away through the forest, and the warriors followed.

When they reached the Gathering place, Streamcrossing, Shardwhisker noted why it was named so: it was ringed by streams on all sides. Four cats perched atop a tall rock. "The High Stone," Silverpaw whispered when she saw where Shardwhisker was looking. (I still used "High Stone" what was wrong with me)

"You're late," growled a white she-cat, one of the leaders. That's Icestar, the LeafClan leader. Spottedtail had told him about the other Clans' leaders. The light brown tabby tom was Pinestar of StreamClan; the mottled gray tabby she-cat was Pebblestar of BreezeClan; the pale gray she-cat was Willowstar of ShadeClan.

A pair of cats--a black she-cat and a black-and-white tom--padded over to where Shardwhisker sat. ShadeClan! Shardwhisker leaped to his paws and hissed.

"Calm down!" the she-cat meowed, amused. "I'm Runningstream, and this is my brother, Swiftcloud. We were just coming to talk. You don't fight at a Gathering. Not unless you want SunClan to cover the moon." (she somehow knows he's not just a weirdly hostile warrior? I guess Shardwhisker is famous but he's still being hostile at a Gathering; you'd think she'd be a little more defensive)

So this is what a Gathering is!

"I'm Shardwhisker," Shardwhisker meowed cautiously. "I'm a warrior of--"

"CloudClan," Swiftcloud interrupted.

"The scent," Runningstream explained. "That's how we knew. Just like you know what Clan we're from."

"ShadeClan," Shardwhisker meowed.

"Exactly!"

"Goldenstar," Icestar growled. "Why have you brought a rogue to this Gathering?"

"A rogue?" Pinestar looked interested--and that wasn't good. Willowstar narrowed her eyes.

"I know him!" Pebblestar had caught sight of Shardwhisker. "The black tabby. He hunts in our territory sometimes. Yes, why have you brought him?"

Goldenstar blinked. "He's no rogue. Shardwhisker was a loner, but now he is a warrior of Cloud--"

"That's no excuse!" yowled Icestar. "Goldenstar, you threaten us all when you welcome him!" (Shardwhisker specifically said that, despite being a showoff who wanted to get caught hunting on Clan territory, he knew he wasn't strong enough to threaten a Clan cat)

"But--but I--" Goldenstar stammered.

"Get rid of him now!" Icestar demanded. All Shardwhisker could think of was a pair of spotted toms. In his mind, Kestrelstar was yelling furiously at him to defend himself. Spottedtail was growling. (no one cares about Kestrelstar)

I told you so.

CHAPTER EIGHT
New Friends (…you could call them that)

"I said, get rid of the rogue!"

"He is not a rogue!" Goldenstar spat. This was the first time Shardwhisker had ever seen the CloudClan leader angry. "He is a warrior of my Clan!"

"He is a rogue. Once a rogue, always a rogue. You're mouse-brained to think I wouldn't notice," Pebblestar growled. "It's a wonder all your warriors agree."

"We don't!" Spottedtail yowled.

About half of the CloudClan warriors, along with most of the others, yowled their agreement with Icestar and Pebblestar. (how has CloudClan not made up their mind yet)

Then Willowstar spoke. "Goldenstar, you know how my Clan feels about rogues."

"Not you, too," Goldenstar spat.

Willowstar glared at him, then gazed out at the five gathered Clans. "But how is he a rogue now?"

Even Pebblestar and Icestar stopped yowling.

"He's a warrior. He fights and hunts for CloudClan. Which means he must stay within CloudClan territory if he is to escape punishment."

Shardwhisker was confused. Why was Willowstar helping him?

"I don't think it's right," Willowstar meowed, "but at least he's out of our fur."

"I suppose," Icestar growled.

Pebblestar hissed. "I can't stay here. Not with everyone agreeing that rogues should be welcomed." She sprang off the rock and stalked away, the rest of BreezeClan following her.

"Never make Willowstar mad," Runningstream whispered gleefully. "She thinks of things no one else would, which makes it really hard to argue." (things no one else would think of!?)

Swiftcloud purred in amusement. "Runningstream has experience." He mimicked Willowstar's voice. "'Runningpaw, I don't care if the shrew was right on the border, you could have pounced on another apprentice from the other side!'"

"'Swiftpaw, I don't care if the river is in our territory, downstream is in CloudClan territory! Don't go swimming there again unless you want them to rip your pelt off!'"

"Shardwhisker," Goldenstar called. "We're leaving."

Shardwhisker followed the CloudClan leader.

He had to think about what had happened at the Gathering. (no? there's nothing to think about)

CHAPTER NINE
The Ceremonies

"Shardwhisker! Shardwhisker!" Cloudkit squeaked. "I'm six moons old!"

"Me too!" Falconkit boasted.

Dewkit shoved him. "If she is, then we are too," she reminded her brother. "We were born on the same day."

Shardwhisker nodded. "Swiftsong told me."

"I hope I get a really, really good mentor!" Cloudkit squeaked. "Like Goldenstar! Or Father! Or you!"

"Or Mother," Falconkit added.

"Mouse-brain!" Dewkit squeaked, shoving him again. "Mothers don't mentor their own kits." (uh, neither do fathers? maybe they just don't think about that because they're kits?)

"Oh, yeah," Falconkit mewed.

"I'm sure you'll all get good--"

Goldenstar cut him off. "Let all cats old enough to catch their own prey join beneath Arrow Rock for a Clan meeting!" (it was called Cloud Rock a few chapters ago)

Shardwhisker raced over. He could name every warrior in the Clan by now; it had been a quarter moon since the Gathering, and he almost felt a part of CloudClan. Not quite, though. There was a feeling in his heart that he couldn't identify, and it was telling him he didn't belong. I wish I belonged. Oh, how I wish I could belong somewhere. Anywhere. (shut up, internal monologue)

"Today we have three new apprentices to name."

Cloudkit couldn't restrain herself. "Me!" she squealed. This time, Falconkit shoved his sister, instead of being shoved.

"Stop it, mouse-brain!" Falconkit hissed. "We're getting mentors now!"

Goldenstar watched them with amusement; then he continued. "Cloudkit." It's a good thing he chose her first, Shardwhisker thought privately, or she'd explode watching her brother and sister become apprentices before her.

"You are six moons old today, ready to become an apprentice of CloudClan." Goldenstar turned his face to the sky. "From this moment forward you will be known as Cloudpaw. Your mentor will be Swiftsong. Swiftsong, I trust you will pass on all your skills to this young apprentice." He gazed down at the Clan again. Shardwhisker could sense Snowleaf quivering excitedly, probably straining to hold back an excited flow of words. (wow, Snowleaf talks a lot? I had no idea)

Cloudpaw beamed as she dashed over to touch noses with her new mentor. Swiftsong and Bramblewhisker exchanged amused looks.

"Falconkit. From this moment on, you shall be called Falconpaw. Finchwhisker, I know you will pass all of your knowledge on to Falconpaw."

Falconpaw was obviously forcing a serious, sage expression onto his face, trying to make up for his sister's excitable nature, as he carefully touched Finchwhisker's nose. His face looked strained. Cloudpaw and Dewkit could barely keep from laughing; even Silverpaw, Oakpaw, and most of the warriors were amused. (is this Brackenfur's apprentice ceremony)

"Dewkit, from this moment forward you shall be known as Dewpaw. Your mentor will be Clawstorm. Clawstorm, I trust you will teach Dewpaw everything you know."

Dewpaw padded quickly over to her mentor and touched his nose. Clawstorm flashed Goldenstar a grateful glance as he bent down.

"I have one more duty to perform today," Goldenstar continued, gazing upward at the sky again. "Shardwhisker has learned the way of a warrior. SunClan, I call upon you to look down at this cat. He has trained hard to understand the way of your noble code, and commend him to you as a warrior in his turn." Goldenstar stared at Shardwhisker. "Shardwhisker, do you promise to uphold the warrior code and to protect and defend your Clan, even at the cost of your life?"

Shardwhisker didn't know the exact words to say, so he responded, "Um--yes."

Goldenstar shook his head briefly, as if to say, Mouse-brain! and then continued: "Then by the powers of SunClan, I confirm your name as warrior. You will sit vigil tonight. We welcome you as a full warrior of CloudClan." He cast his gaze around the Clan. "You have proven yourself worthy."

The Clan began to chant. "Cloudpaw! Falconpaw! Dewpaw! Shardwhisker! Cloudpaw! Falconpaw! Dewpaw! Shardwhisker!" (what, no riot?)

Shardwhisker felt a swell of pride.

I am a warrior at last. (shut up)

CHAPTER TEN
Dropping Hints (is this The Chapter I was remembering)

Sitting vigil was hard. Facing Spottedtail the next day was harder.

"Goldenstar insists that I take you on a hunting patrol this evening," Spottedtail growled.

With Spottedtail?

"He wants me to make sure you 'fit in,'" Spottedtail continued. "As if you could ever fit in with the Clan."

Maybe Spottedtail was right. Shardwhisker sure didn't feel as if he fit in. Even as a warrior, he didn't know if he could face it. He'd already eaten on hunting patrols several times, and contradicted patrol leaders' decisions.

"Stop it, Spottedtail," Swiftsong sighed. "He's tired. Shardwhisker, go to the warriors' den and sleep."

Shardwhisker followed instructions. He was exhausted.

When he woke up, it was almost sunhigh. Shardwhisker padded out of the warriors' den and was immediately knocked to the ground.

"We got him!" crowed a very familiar voice. "Let's take him prisoner!"

"Okay, Cloudstar," mewed Falconpaw. "We'll--"

Shardwhisker stood up and shook the three apprentices off. "The prisoner escaped."

"Falconfur! Dewstrike! Let's get out of here!"

Cloudpaw, Dewpaw, and Falconpaw scurried away. Shardwhisker twitched his whiskers.

"Are they bothering you?" Spottedtalon mewed. "I can talk to the mentors."

"No, it's fine," Shardwhisker replied. He saw Spottedtalon's midnight blue eyes glimmer. Was she okay? (no not this plot thread go away Spottedtalon)

"I'm coming on the hunting patrol tonight," Spottedtalon mewed shyly, and padded lightly away.

Oh, yeah. The hunting patrol.

I'd better get ready. (are these chapters getting shorter or were they always this short)

CHAPTER ELEVEN
An Uninvited Guest (this is the one I was thinking of)

"Hey! Shardwhisker!"

"What?" he snapped.

"Did Goldenstar make you a warrior?" the voice continued. Shardwhisker padded cautiously toward the border. (wait, no, it's not) "What are you doing on your own? Did you get lost? Are you hunting?"

Shardwhisker finally saw who it was. "Oh, Runningstream! Hi. I'm hunting. I've been tracking squirrels."

Runningstream waved her tail in the air. "Swiftcloud and I are hunting!"

"Just don't cross the border," Shardwhisker warned, flicking his tail at the scent line.

Runningstream rolled her eyes. "What am I, a kit? Of course I know not to cross the border! I'm a warrior, for SunClan's sake!"

Shardwhisker meowed hastily, "Sorry!" Then he added, "I'm with Spottedtail and Spottedtalon right now, just so you know. They could come at any minute. And you know how Spottedtail feels about me."

Runningstream winked. "Got it. You can't be seen talking to anyone from another Clan, especially a she-cat."

Shardwhisker glared at her. "Anyone is right! He'd have my fur!" (I know this means Shardwhisker isn't thinking of romance, but I'm going to choose to interpret it as him being bi)

"Just so long as he doesn't have mine?" Runningstream purred, amused.

"He doesn't care about you!" Shardwhisker snapped. "He's the deputy. He could easily convince some of the warriors to turn against me, and then where would I be? Not here, that's for sure. Dead!" (doesn't half the Clan hate him already? I never actually showed them changing their minds)

Something compelled him to add, "And by the way, Spottedtalon likes me already. So you're out of luck." (ah, so he did understand that part)

The last thing he saw before stalking away was Runningstream's puzzled expression. She's not fooling me! he thought. Still, he couldn't help wondering if he could have been nicer. Too bad; he'd already snapped. He had to focus all his attention on hunting.

There. Shardwhisker carefully approached a sparrow. He recalled the sparrowlaunch and pounced at the small bird. It tried to escape, but he was too quick.

Let's see Spottedtail find fault in that!

It was off-putting to see that Spottedtail had managed to catch two squirrels, and that Spottedtalon had found a rabbit, but Shardwhisker didn't mind. He had his prey, and no one could accuse him of disloyalty. Imagine talking to a ShadeClan cat! He'd rather be exiled!

Which I still very might be, he reflected, eyeing the CloudClan deputy and his two squirrels.

CHAPTER TWELVE
Surprise (okay this is The Chapter)

"I think you like me." (yes this is it)

Shardwhisker leaped into the air. "Whaaaa!" he screeched. (why did I write this)

Someone giggled. "Yeah. You do."

"Who's there?" he demanded.

"Me!"

Shardwhisker cast his yellow gaze (we know his eyes are yellow already!) around the camp entrance. "Who are you?"

"You don't recognize me?"

Not her again! "Runningstream, go away." (here she is)

"Can't."

"Why not?" Shardwhisker couldn't find her.

"Check the brambles."

He peered into a bramble bush and spotted her, hopelessly tangled in its thorny branches. "It hurts in here," she complained. (I mean you deserve it)

Angry as he was at this insane ShadeClan cat, Shardwhisker couldn't help being amused at her predicament. "Good luck," he meowed, hoping his voice sounded cold, and not shaking with laughter.

"Please?" Runningstream looked panicked. "Help me out of here!"

Shardwhisker sighed. "All right. But then you're going home."

"Okay," Runningstream agreed.

Shardwhisker reached in with his paws. "I can't find you," he grunted.

There was a purr of amusement behind him. "Tricked you!" (jerk)

Shardwhisker whirled around, in time to see the slender black she-cat dashing away.

"'Bye," she sang as she disappeared into the forest. (and stay out!)

CHAPTER THIRTEEN
Visiting Home

"Hurry up!" Spottedtail snapped. "We're not hunting here!"

Shardwhisker wasn't supposed to be on the hunting patrol, but Spottedtail had overlooked him when organizing the patrols. He didn't have an apprentice, so Goldenstar had told him to join the next hunting patrol. Unfortunately, that patrol was led by Spottedtail. (I guess maybe the intent was that Spottedtail pointedly ignored him when assigning patrols, but you'd think he'd remember Shardwhisker just to either keep him out of his way or make his life harder)

"Yeah, can't you try to keep up?" Heathercloud shot over her shoulder. Finchwhisker said nothing, but she glanced back at Shardwhisker and shrugged apologetically. (I'll give myself a pass for the shrugs but here is my official acknowledgement that they can't do that)

"You stop yelling at Shardwhisker!" shouted Falconpaw. "He can't run as fast 'cause he wasn't born in the Clan!"

Spottedtail responded to this by hissing and running faster. Shardwhisker didn't want to complain, but he could barely keep up with the more experienced warriors. Even Falconpaw was faster than he was.

"Wait--up," he panted. Falconpaw's words echoed in his head: He can't run as fast 'cause he wasn't born in the Clan! The apprentice had meant well, but all Shardwhisker could think was, Wasn't born in the Clan. Wasn't born in the Clan. Wasn't born in the Clan.

"We're here," Spottedtail growled after a few more minutes of running. "The High Cliff. Let's hunt."

Shardwhisker slipped down the cliff (sounds dangerous) and onto the familiar hot sand. It warmed his paws, and he sighed happily. Not much had changed since he'd last been there.

He sighted a host of sparrows (did I seriously look up what a group of sparrows was called for this) and was about to pounce, but then he realized that would never work. He could only catch one sparrow before the rest would fly away, and that wouldn't help anyone eat. He cast his gaze around the sand until he spotted a lone sparrow, focused on its dustbath. He crept up and pounced at the bird. Shardwhisker quickly killed it and placed it carefully below the High Cliff. Another sparrow was caught the same way, and then, when he saw that the rest of the patrol was ready, he attacked the host. The sparrows scattered--they'd apparently noticed him before--and fluttered away, sand trailing from their wings.

"Ready, Shardwhisker?" Spottedtail called impatiently. Shardwhisker retrieved his two sparrows and followed the patrol back to the CloudClan camp.

When they reached camp, two warriors--Auburntail and Spottedtalon--rushed to meet them.

As he'd suspected, Auburntail was coming to speak to her son. Falconpaw proudly showed her a vole he'd caught. "You can eat it if you want," he offered to his mother.

Also as Shardwhisker had suspected, Spottedtalon had come to speak to him. (why did I treat this like a cliffhanger)

CHAPTER FOURTEEN
The Return of Kestrelstar (no one wanted this)

"Shardwhisker," Spottedtalon mewed shyly, "I just wanted to tell you that you did a good job. I think you're a great warrior."

"I--" Shardwhisker stammered. (no Shardwhisker your one redeeming quality was your complete rejection of other cats' affection for you)

"It's okay," Spottedtalon assured him. "I don't mind that you aren't from CloudClan. You're my Clanmate now."

Shardwhisker hung his head. How could he tell her what he was feeling? I don't belong here. It'll really hurt her feelings, but I don't know if I can stand to stay. But all he said was, "Thanks." He padded away, feeling lower than a worm.

His dreams were no more peaceful, although at least Spottedtail wasn't breathing down his neck the whole time. Only part of the time. Then he was in a strange place, with alien plants he'd seen once before. (I've decided they're palm trees and no one can convince me otherwise)

"Good to see how well you're fitting in," meowed a voice that Shardwhisker recognized instantly, though he hadn't heard it for more than half a moon. "Really, you could hardly be doing any worse. Defend your honor, you mouse-brain!"

"You," Shardwhisker snarled. "You got me into this mess! Now get me out of it!"

"Me?" Kestrelstar meowed in mock horror. "I'm shocked! I would never mean to save your worthless pelt!"

"Not that," Shardwhisker snapped. "I don't want to be a part of CloudClan. Spottedtail hates me!"

"I can see why," Kestrelstar growled. "If you're like this all the time--"

"But I'm not," Shardwhisker wailed. "You've been watching, haven't you?"

"Kind of," admitted the spotted tom, tilting his fuzzy ears in an odd way, with one hanging down and the other slanted diagonally over his head. (shut up Kestrelstar no one likes you)

Shardwhisker turned, ready to stalk away, but the opening in the clearing's wall had closed, leaving an impenetrable screen of brambles, weaved tightly together.

"You're stuck," Kestrelstar explained, with a weary sigh. "Stuck in CloudClan. It's your des-ti-ny, Shardwhisker. Destiny. You can't escape it if it is your destiny. That's the whole point."

"I'm tired of this," Shardwhisker snarled. "I wish I'd never offered to join CloudClan. I wish I'd run the other way before Spottedtail came!"

"But you still wish you saved the kits?" Kestrelstar checked.

"They're apprent--I mean, they were kits. No one with half a heart would ever let the kits die."

Kestrelstar flicked his tail. "Suit yourself."

Shardwhisker was just about to launch himself at the arrogant spotted tom, but Kestrelstar stepped aside. "Good-bye," he meowed conversationally, and Shardwhisker plunged back into reality.

CHAPTER FIFTEEN
The Final Mistake (remember all that foreshadowing from before!? it finally comes to fruition!)

"Great catch!"

"You again?" Shardwhisker snapped. "Look, Runningstream, I told you to leave me alone!"

She stopped, hurt. "And I did... for a while." She brightened a little, her eyes sparkling with mischief. (is she Edward Cullen get out of here)

"Runningstream, I'm a CloudClan cat. And you're not. So just leave me alone, okay? Forever." (Shardwhisker is not having this creepy nonsense)

She glared at him. "Fine," she snapped, her voice cracking. The black she-cat stormed away, growling as she left, "He's just fox dung. Who cares about him?"

Shardwhisker sighed and picked up his sparrow. He padded toward the LeafClan border and retrieved the pale sparrow he'd left there that morning.

Then, on his way back to camp, he spied something odd. A lone white cat, its tail straight out behind it, padded along the bottom of a ravine--in the same direction he was going--away from LeafClan, toward the CloudClan camp.

An alarm went off in his mind. I know this cat. But who could it be? It looks lost but certain of where it's going. Like it's new here but it knows the way.

Then it hit him: That cat does not belong. That cat is Icestar of LeafClan. (wow guess where this is going)

Shardwhisker pounced instantly, dropping both sparrows as he flew down into the ravine. He landed on top of the white cat, flattening her. She struggled out, but her underbelly, chest, and paws were covered in mud (convenient), and she slipped. Shardwhisker raked his claws down Icestar's flank. She hissed. "You get away from me, you crow-food-eating menace!" she shrieked. "How dare you attack me? Who do you think you are? You're in trouble now!" (wow, that sure is a lot of words, isn't it)

Icestar lunged at him. "I'll make you sorry you attacked me! You'll pay! I'll get rid of you now! Spottedtail was right! Goldenstar was wrong!" She clamped her teeth around Shardwhisker's paw.

"You'll be sorrier," Shardwhisker growled, feeling the pain lance through his paw. Could be worse, I suppose--not like she's a poisonous adder. (venomous, Shardwhisker, adders are venomous, but you're a fictional character, I'll give it to you)

Icestar lashed out with her hind paws. Shardwhisker barely dodged the blow. "I will not! You'll regret this! I'm glad you were so obvious. Now no one can deny that you don't belong in the Clans. Willowstar was wrong. You are more dangerous in CloudClan, because now you have access to the territory and no one can drive you out. But no longer. Help!" she snarled, screeching the last word just as a hunting patrol arrived.

"Come on and help," Shardwhisker called, leaping aside as Icestar again lunged.

"Oh, we'll help," snarled Swiftsong. "Traitor!"

The white she-cat dashed a few fox-lengths away and gave a few licks to her chest.

She revealed silver fur. (what a surprise!!!)

Oh, no.

CHAPTER SIXTEEN
The Exile

"What--but I thought--" Shardwhisker stammered.

Snowleaf was spitting venom at him (wow, she is venomous after all! at least she's not poisonous): "I'm sorry I ever let you into the Clan! Why did I ever doubt Spottedtail? He was right all along! What did I ever do to you? Wait, let me guess, you don't need a reason. That's most likely, seeing as you're a rogue. He was right. Once a rogue, always a rogue. You don't deserve the name of warrior!"

"You weren't--you were quiet--" Shardwhisker tried, but Swiftsong interrupted him.

"I trusted you!" she roared. "Goldenstar gave you the noble life as a warrior. And this is how you repay the Clan?"

"Come on. Goldenstar is not going to be pleased with this." Shardwhisker had never seen Bramblewhisker so furious. "You lying traitor."

"Sneaky rogue," Patchfeather added.

Oh, SunClan, what have I done? I'm such a mouse-brain! I should have guessed when she started chattering in battle. Now I'm going to be exiled!

Exiled?

His eyes widened and his mouth opened. (no) It's the break I've been waiting for! I can live on my own now, without having to fight for the Clan and get killed! Best of all, now I don't have to tell Spottedtalon why I left! (for what it's worth, there was no "end italics" code bit in there, but I added it just now to avoid formatting problems) He stopped protesting as the warriors encircled him, escorting him back to camp.

But a part of him was full of horror. He'd just become part of the Clan, and now he was being exiled. It would be different if he were leaving by his choice. But being forced to leave was different, like plunging into an icy river.

"What's this?" Goldenstar meowed as they entered camp. "Snowleaf is hurt? What happened?" The CloudClan leader's searching golden gaze scanned the warriors like laser beams before settling accusingly on Shardwhisker. "You."

"I didn't--she wasn't--I thought--" Shardwhisker stammered, but he was interrupted again.

"I told you so," Spottedtail snarled. "He's a traitor, Goldenstar. He hasn't changed a bit. The saying is true--better to scare off a mouse than to welcome a badger. (this saying is from the real series isn't it) We didn't pay attention, and we welcomed a badger. I say, kill him now!"

Shardwhisker saw his opening in the circle of warriors as Snowleaf padded away, muttering, to heal herself, and he dashed away, ignoring the cries of "You come back here!" and "Hold it right there!" (who even says that) He focused all his energy on running. They could not catch him. He wouldn't let them. (I thought he couldn't run as fast as a Clan cat)

A single cry caught his attention. He faltered at this, but shook his head impatiently and ran faster than he had ever run before. She wasn't going to end his life by calling him back.

It was Spottedtalon: "I thought you loved me!" she cried. "Next time we meet, I won't be so stupid!" (wow, such cutting words)

CHAPTER SEVENTEEN
Alone At Last (get it get it get it "Alone and Proud" "Alone at Last" isn't that so clever)

Shardwhisker's heart was heavy. Which was strange, because it was hollow. (okay Bella Swan)

I have all I ever wanted. Right here. And yet... I don't. It's not enough anymore, to be on my own, somehow. I am right here, where I lived most of my life. Where, the past half moon (the past half moon? has it only been half a moon? I somehow thought it had been longer than that but I'm not going back and checking), I dreamed of returning to. And yet I am more lost than I have ever been before.

He picked at the sparrow before him. The sand was warm beneath him, but it didn't comfort him. Even the sound of rippling water issuing gently from the lake failed to make him feel at home.

I'm a failure.

Mouse-brain.

Kestrelstar had been wrong and right at the same time. You must change your ways.

I did change my ways, Shardwhisker mourned, but then I lost... What? What had he lost? I lost what I never wanted... and I realized that maybe, just maybe, that was what I wanted all along.

Even his dreams weren't helpful. He saw furious faces; Spottedtalon's cry rang in his mind. I thought you loved me... One night he saw Kestrelstar, but Shardwhisker didn't have the strength to attack him, just yell. Kestrelstar had stared coolly at him for a moment. Then Shardwhisker had yowled, You lied! You told me to change my ways, and I lost everything!

Kestrelstar had snapped at that. If I did everything perfectly nice, and I said, "Oh, wonderful, wonderful Shardwhisker, you're doing perfectly," that would have been a complete lie! You're too blind to see past your own nose, and too deaf to hear anything outside of your own thoughts. Oh, right, it's all my fault that you didn't make it! Now look, your destiny's going to come back and scratch you so hard you'll still be yowling when you get wherever rogues go when they die! Now stop whining, kit, or I'll scratch you first!

Shardwhisker kicked at the sparrow. His paw sent it flying, landing in the sand and throwing a tiny plume of dust in the air.

Hunting was no longer exciting. The warmth in the sand reminded him painfully of the warriors' den. (the one place where there wouldn't be sunlight to warm the ground? I get that there would be body heat but that's not a very logical jump) He was the only living thing he could see from where he stood. (wow, not even plants!)

I have found what I dreamed of.

I am totally alone.

CHAPTER EIGHTEEN
A Cry for Help (it looks as if this was when I realized I needed a plot)

"Help us!"

Shardwhisker leaped to his paws. "Who is it?" he yelped, startled.

"Help!" wailed the voice. He turned his head. Two cats streaked toward him.

"They've come," wailed Falconpaw.

Dewpaw added, distraught, "They attacked our camp!"

"And you came to me because?" Shardwhisker growled. This was probably a trap. The Clan didn't trust him; why would they ask him for help?

"We need you," Falconpaw howled. "We need you right now!"

"She died!" Dewpaw screeched, almost hysterical. "I thought you cared about us! Was it all an act?" Her voice cracked, and she wailed more. Falconpaw joined her, and the two young apprentices collapsed on the sand. (I get that you're upset but you're also supposedly little kids and this is not how you talk)

"Who died?" Shardwhisker asked, gentler now. (who do you think)

"Not like you would care," Falconpaw shrieked. "We're going to go avenge her death now! Too bad we wasted time trying to get you to help!"

Realization dawned on Shardwhisker, and his fur stood on end. "Not Cloudpaw?" he whispered. "Surely not Cloudpaw?"

"You got it," Dewpaw yowled, "Cloudpaw died. And now you won't help us at all. I hate you, Shardwhisker. I hate you!" She turned and bolted away, Falconpaw hard on her heels.

Shardwhisker took off after them. As he ran, he panted, "I'm sorry--I didn't--believe you." Dewpaw flashed him an angry glare. "Don't be--that way," he panted. "It's just--the Clan--doesn't trust--me anymore."

"With good reason," Falconpaw shot back, trying to escape Shardwhisker by veering left and right in a zigzag. "You attacked Snowleaf."

"I thought--she was--Icestar," Shardwhisker explained. "I didn't--realize--what I was--doing."

Dewpaw twitched her ear but sped up. "Hurry," she mewed, strained.

As they burst into camp, Shardwhisker saw that, as he'd expected, it was in total chaos. Battle raged everywhere. A voice kept shrieking, "Where is he? Where is he?" (why do you care Pebblestar go away)

Cloudpaw lay on the ground in a pool of blood.

"Sorry about--Cloudpaw," Shardwhisker panted. "I should--have been here." He was regaining his breath, but thorns pierced his heart. Cloudpaw. Happy, enthusiastic Cloudpaw, who never let anything upset her...Is dead.

"You!" The piercing shriek was Spottedtalon. "You caused this!" She took a deep breath, but another cat pushed her to the ground before she could yowl anything.

"He's come to help," Falconpaw hissed, stepping away from Spottedtalon. She gave him a funny look and took another breath, but he slapped his tail over her mouth. "Please believe me!"

Dewpaw lashed out at a dark ginger warrior twice her size. "Go," she hissed to Shardwhisker. "Find Pebblestar!"

CHAPTER NINETEEN
Victory (wow I wonder if he wins)

It was easy enough to figure out where Pebblestar was, since she screeched every few seconds: "Where is he?"

His yellow gaze locked on the Cloud Cave. The pond separated him from the rocky cave. (this is a non-issue; the path has already been mentioned, and you have already walked on it)

"You!" snarled Spottedtail. The CloudClan deputy, along with a pair of brown toms, thrust himself at Shardwhisker.

They all think I'm against them! Shardwhisker realized. He kicked the CloudClan deputy away, but the two brown toms were luckier. They ripped at his pelt.

Shardwhisker twisted away from them and bounded away, only to run into Swiftsong and a silver she-cat. They were locked in battle, but both lashed out at him when he came near. Then a black tom barred his path. Clawstorm flattened the tom and kicked at his pelt, then bared his teeth and hissed at Shardwhisker, who leaped over the gray tabby warrior. Speckleclaw and a calico she-cat pursued him, but he made it to the Cloud Cave.

"Where is he?" Pebblestar screeched again. Goldenstar lay bleeding in the corner of the cave. Pebblestar turned to see Shardwhisker, along with the two other warriors, dashing in.

"Oh, there he is," Pebblestar growled, almost purring--she sounded dangerous. "We've come to get even with CloudClan for bringing danger into the Clans. Now we'll dispose of this danger." (okay I get why she'd be salty about Goldenstar taking in a rogue who was good at hunting…but this is absolutely ridiculous)

"Never!" Shardwhisker snarled. "I fight for Cloudpaw, not for myself. You killed her, and now you will pay!"

Pebblestar dodged his first attack and pounced on him as he turned to see where she now stood. He clutched at her shoulder, where he saw angry red wounds. She clamped her jaws on his foreleg. Pain shot through Shardwhisker.

I will not give in!

Pebblestar had the upper paw--but then Shardwhisker recalled the sight of Cloudpaw, killed by this cat's warriors. Yowling in rage, Shardwhisker kicked with all his strength.

Pebblestar hit the stone of the cave and fell to the floor, lifeless. (well that was anticlimactic)

"You--" Speckleclaw gasped. "You--you--" The calico she-cat was speechless.

"He saved me," Goldenstar whispered. "Shardwhisker, why have you changed?" (okay, we know he didn't mean to attack Snowleaf, but you don't, so: killing another Clan's leader does not automatically mean that he's really on your side; considering Pebblestar actively wanted to kill him, it immediately benefits him to kill her)

"I didn't," Shardwhisker growled. "I never meant to hurt Snowleaf. I thought she was Icestar. I was defending our territory," Shardwhisker meowed.

"Snowleaf did tell me exactly what happened," Goldenstar mused; "she had no herbs and was keeping her mouth shut tight, to keep safe while traveling away from LeafClan. All of this makes me believe you.

"Especially," he added after a moment, "because you saved the Clan."

CHAPTER TWENTY
Reunited With CloudClan (no really)

"Pebblestar?" The calico took a few cautious paces forward.

The BreezeClan leader stirred. (that took a while)

So that wasn't her last life!

The calico rushed to her leader's side. "Pebblestar!"

"You win this time," the mottled gray she-cat growled. "Next time, you won't be so lucky."

Shardwhisker watched in awe as the BreezeClan leader struggled out of camp, her astonished warriors following reluctantly and casting dirty looks at the CloudClan cats.

"Shardwhisker," Goldenstar whispered, "come here. Speckleclaw, please leave."

The small tom obliged, glaring at Shardwhisker as he passed.

"I have to tell you the real reason I believe you. Snowleaf's story helped, but I was also visited." Goldenstar paused. (so Kestrelstar directly told Goldenstar that Shardwhisker wasn't at fault…I can understand not wanting to go after Shardwhisker, but Goldenstar didn't even tell CloudClan that their equivalent of StarClan said Shardwhisker was in the clear!?)

Shardwhisker interrupted. "Let me guess--he looked like Spottedtail, but he had fuzzy ears, and his emotions changed quickly."

"Yes. I assume you know Kestrelstar, then?"

"We've met," Shardwhisker growled, thinking of how Kestrelstar had ranted at him.

"He convinced me it was an accident," Goldenstar explained.

"So I can rejoin CloudClan?" Shardwhisker would have been surprised a moon ago to hear himself say this, but now he knew it was what he wanted.

"If you wish." Goldenstar fixed Shardwhisker with his golden gaze. (stop saying golden) "I will tell them SunClan defended you." (Goldenstar why didn't you do that before so Spottedtail didn't track Shardwhisker down and kill him)

"Thank you!" meowed Shardwhisker.

There. I changed my ways. Are you happy, Kestrelstar? (why is that still relevant)

EPILOGUE
The CloudClan Warrior

At first, the Clan was dubious, but as Goldenstar explained what Kestrelstar had told him--He didn't mean to; I could see in his face that he truly believed it was Icestar he was attacking...--they gradually accepted him. (ooh so Kestrelstar technically lied to Goldenstar! that or I forgot the whole "I can only kind of watch you" thing)

Runningstream has a broken heart, but she is looking for someone to fill the hole. She and Swiftcloud are now seventeen moons old. (stay brokenhearted and single forever please Runningstream I'm begging you)

Shardwhisker is nineteen moons old. (uh he was eighteen moons old a moon and a half before the end of the story wasn't he)

Spottedtalon and Shardwhisker are going to be mates. (I don't want this)

Spottedtail still hates Shardwhisker, but he has accepted that the dark tabby is a part of his Clan now. (also I have no defense for writing this type of epilogue again)

Snowleaf now has an apprentice; Oakpaw decided he would rather be a medicine cat than a warrior.

Swiftsong is going to have Bramblewhisker's kits. (no one cares)

Rumors are going around CloudClan that Brackentail and Peachfur are in love. (no one cares)

Kestrelstar was right: Although he directed Shardwhisker to CloudClan, Shardwhisker was the one who had to make the final choice. Shardwhisker is a true part of CloudClan. (yeah we all just read the story)

Dappled Leaves (document "DAPPLED LEAVES" created 12/30/2013 and last modified 5/31/2014)
seems to be effectively a transcribed version of a 600-page comic that I might eventually repost in the AF

SPOILER: Click to show

*I am making a banner; Pixelmator stopped working when I tried to save it. hey, I did make a banner! I'll add it in here:

(as implied, I added that in retroactively; banner was created and last modified 8/2/2012, which…was before I made this document…?)

(here there was a url for the "GN" (graphic novel) version of the story)

ALLEGIANCES

SkyClan
Leader Lianastar: Ginger tabby she-cat with white on her paws and muzzle; sea foam green eyes
Deputy Swirledfur: Gray and cream she-cat with blue eyes {Apprentice, Dapplepaw}
Medicine Cat Yellowfur: Pale sand-colored she-cat with ice blue eyes {Apprentice, Foxpaw}
Warriors
Starcloud: Muscular gray and white tom with small ears and blue eyes (what was with me and Star-)
Graycloud: Longhaired gray tom with amber eyes {Apprentice, Redpaw}
Orangefoot: Ginger tom with large paws and yellow eyes
Thundercloud: Young brown tom with one white ear and ice blue eyes (his name was originally Thunderhead and his different ear was yellow not white but my mom made fun of him)
Passionflower: Pale swirled tortoiseshell she-cat with sea-foam-green eyes {Apprentice, Autumnpaw} (a passionflower is a real thing, but Passion- is a really, really bad warrior prefix)
Butterflytail: Gold and black she-cat with aqua eyes
Cloudedfur: Cream and white tom with green eyes
Pebblepelt: Mottled tortoiseshell and white she-cat with green eyes
Petalstorm: White she-cat with flurries of frost-colored (beige-ish) patches and golden eyes
Rowantail: Brown tabby tom with green eyes
Coalpelt: Shiny-pelted black tom with amber eyes
Eaglesky: Brown tabby and white she-cat with blue eyes
Lostheart: Golden tabby and white she-cat with blue-gray eyes
Moonslash: Brown she-cat with gray stripes and spring green eyes (Lord Wolfcry) (I had a character-submission thing after 100 pages of the comic--or maybe 200 pages?--and received…eight characters?)
Splashfire: Small, slender, very beautiful gray and white she-cat with deep cerulean blue eyes, formerly a kittypet and then a rogue (Splashstorm)
Apprentices
Dapplepaw: Ginger and white she-cat with blue eyes
Redpaw: Dark ginger and white she-cat with amber eyes
Foxpaw: Longhaired ginger tom with a white muzzle and green eyes
Autumnpaw: Light brown she-cat with darker mottles {rainwhisper}
Queens
Brightfeather: White she-cat with piercing copper eyes {Kits: Snarekit [ginger and white spike-furred tom], Copperkit [bright cinnamon she-cat], Pollenkit [golden tabby and white she-cat], and Skunkkit [tuxedo tom]}
Elders Moonwhisker: Gray tabby tom with aqua eyes (there is no line break between "Elders" and "Moonwhisker")
Floefur: Black she-cat with white patches like ice floes and green eyes
Stonepelt: Muscular gray tom with long teeth and green eyes

ThunderClan (long story short, the characters are based on Model Magic cats from a game I played with my sister; SkyClan, ShadowClan, and WindClan were mine, and ThunderClan and RiverClan were hers; there were lots of other Clans in the game, and she actually had more Clans than me total, but when I wrote the story I cut it down to the canon Clans)
Leader Tigerstar: Small, longhaired brown tom with green eyes (and anyway what I'm getting at is she had characters named Tigerstar, Bluewhisker(star), Flameheart, Graystripe, and Silverstream, among other cats)
Deputy Bluewhisker: White she-cat with a cream-colored streak down her back and blue eyes
Medicine Cat Dawnwhisker: Longhaired cinnamon she-cat with green eyes
Warriors
Brookstripe: Silver tabby she-cat with aqua eyes and white paws; formerly of RiverClan
Shadefall: Longhaired dark gray tom with white spots and blue eyes
Flamescar: Ginger tabby tom
Fuzzytail: White tom with gray above his green eyes; bushy tail
Pantherclaw: Black tom with a white head and blue eyes
Sunshine: Dark brown tom with amber eyes
Foxtail: Longhaired ginger tom with green eyes

RiverClan (I literally made up all of these cats besides Smallstar, Lazytail, and Waveheart)
Leader Smallstar: Small white she-cat with copper eyes
Deputy Longwhisker: Spiky-furred white tom with green eyes and a wavy tail that drags behind him on the ground; nicknamed Lazytail
Medicine Cat Waveheart: Silver tabby she-cat with aqua eyes {Apprentice, Firedash}
Warriors
Silverstripe: Silver tabby she-cat with green eyes
Redwhisker: Dark ginger tabby tom with amber eyes {Apprentice, Snowpaw}
Creamfeather: Cream and white she-cat with blue eyes (cherryanne)
Leopardpool: Small, pretty, skinny black and white she-cat with orange eyes (Leoparddream)
Apprentices Snowpaw: Gray and white she-cat with ice blue eyes (Clovershadow)
Firedash: Odd-eyed dark brown she-cat with peach, gold, cream, ginger, and dark ginger patches; one green eye (Wildwatcher of Natureclan)

ShadowClan
Leader Tawnystar: Pale tortoiseshell she-cat with emerald green eyes (not that I was that much more creative with ShadowClan than she was with ThunderClan)
Deputy Blacklegs: Black and white tom; white on top, black underneath, with green eyes
Medicine Cat Rainbowheart: Odd-eyed pewter-colored she-cat with one copper eye {Apprentice, Badgertooth} (did I just take it as a given that the other eye would always be blue?)
Warriors
Yellowtail: Cream-colored tabby she-cat with yellow eyes
Peachfur: Sand-colored she-cat with a twisted foot and green eyes
Zebrastripe: Dark grayish-black and white tom with dark blue eyes
Marbleswirl: Longhaired black-and-white tom with blue eyes
Shadeswirl: Black-and-white she-cat with ice blue eyes
Nightstripe: Black-and-white she-cat with yellow eyes
Fierylegs: Tortoiseshell and white tom with bold ginger patches, mostly on his legs, and blue eyes
Snowtail: Longhaired white tom with blue eyes
Starfur: White she-cat with hazel eyes
Shinepelt: Longhaired golden tom with hazel eyes
Blackbelly: Inverse tuxedo tom (white with black underside/paws/etc.) with green eyes; formerly of Twolegplace
Peachheart: Golden tabby she-cat with green eyes; formerly a loner
Wildheart: Longhaired gray she-cat; formerly a kittypet
Darkshadow[star]: Dark brown tabby tom with amber eyes; was about to make himself WindClan's leader after Tealstar, but chased away before receiving nine lives
Tigertalon: Rust-colored tabby tom with golden eyes; formerly a rogue

WindClan
Leader Firestar: Ginger and white tom with one green eye
Deputy Redfoot: Red pointed tom with blue eyes
Medicine Cat Cinderstreak: Mottled silver tabby she-cat with a thick line of black streaks down her back and ice blue eyes {Apprentice, Smokepaw}
Warriors
Blackfeather: Silver tabby she-cat with green eyes, former WindClan deputy
Violetheart: Dark gray tabby she-cat with blue eyes
Snowpelt: White tom with a short tail and green eyes
Gingerclaw: Ginger and white she-cat with green eyes
Bouncemint: Lean dark gray tom with blue eyes, formerly a kittypet (Splashstorm)
Whiteclaw: White tom with copper eyes
Apprentices
Smokepaw: Ginger tom with green eyes

Rogues and Loners
Louie: Three-legged brown and light brown tom with green eyes (Relish)
Fang: Golden tom with gray stripes, blue eyes, and a long tooth (the kit theif123)
Hornet: Lithe golden tom with black stripes, a pale underbelly, and murky sea-green eyes (☠ ♫ Sacred Fire ♫ ☠)
Day's End: Longhaired dark gray tom with amber eyes and head fur that hides his ruined right eye (leopardclaw15w)
Wren: Runaway pale brown and white kittypet she-cat with bright amber eyes (Willowsoul)

*Cynder, Cascadefrost, a cream tabby with dark ear tips and eye marks, Mistwake, and another gray-and-white StarClan cat are also not my own characters, but I don’t remember who created them, sorry. (this is because they're already spirits and therefore not in the allegiances)

(beautiful)

“What’s wrong, Dapplepaw?”

Redpaw’s tongue swiped over her lips. Tufts of squirrel fur clung to her whiskers, but her pride had quickly turned to concern at the sight of Dapplepaw’s dismay.

“Look what I caught,” Dapplepaw mumbled, trying not to drop the pair of mice clutched in her jaws.

“Uh, what’s wrong with them?”

“I was supposed to catch squirrels, not mice!” Dapplepaw burst. “Swirledfur’s gonna kill me when she finds out!”

“She can’t be that bad. After all, Lianastar liked her enough to make her deputy.” Redear cocked her head, waiting for a response. When none came, she sighed and added, “But if it really bothers you, you can go back to the Fallen Maple and dig up a squirrel I buried there earlier today. I don’t mind if you take it. You can pretend it’s yours.”

“Really?” Dapplepaw leapt to her paws, dropping the mice. “You’re the best sister ever, Redpaw!”

“Not so fast!” Redpaw peered apologetically at Dapplepaw as Swirledfur stalked past her. “You were told to catch squirrels. Not steal them from Redpaw.” She thrust her muzzle forward. “Honorable warriors don’t steal—not that you’d understand anything about that, Dapplepaw.” (I promise I actually liked Swirled…fur)

Heavy pawsteps announced Starcloud’s arrival. “Fighting again, girls?” His eyes were narrowed in what appeared to be an attempt at slyness. (slyness?)

“Oh, hi, Starcloud! Um, I was wondering if you knew where Graycloud was so he and I could train Redpaw and Dapplepaw—you know, battle training. Do you and Thunderpaw want to join us?” Swirledfur was recovering quickly from being flustered, but she had not masked it. (I honestly cannot tell if Swirledfur was supposed to have a crush on Starcloud or not but I really hope not)

“Graycloud?” asked Starcloud. “Who needs him?”

Dapplepaw and Redpaw both sat still, watching Swirledfur carefully.

“Uh…was this a bad time to come train?” Thunderpaw meowed, ice blue eyes clouding slightly.

“Nope!” Dapplepaw and Redpaw said together. (wow how subtle)

“Good,” he said, nodding. “That’s good. I was going to train with Stormpaw, but, you know, he’s pretty busy. Yeah. Hunting a lot today.”

“So I was thinking,” Starcloud meowed loudly, “we’ve already taught them a lot—at least, I hope you and Graycloud have been keeping up with me.”

“I’ve been doing just fine,” she snapped, “and Redpaw is a quick learner. Graycloud isn’t that bad, you know.”

Starcloud grunted. “Sure.” He turned to his apprentice. “All right, Thunderpaw, attack me.”

Thunderpaw’s first strike bounced harmlessly off Starcloud’s shoulder, but he latched on the second time. Swirledfur watched them spar for a bit—Starcloud clearly going easy on Thunderpaw—but then stepped in. “We’re waiting.” Thunderpaw stepped on his tail and fell forward, catching Starcloud off guard and knocking him down.

“Good job,” Starcloud spat. “Get off me.”

“Sorry.”

“Dapplepaw…DAPPLEPAW!” Redpaw shouted.

“Wha—I’m thinking,” Dapplepaw protested as her memory of the training session gave way to her sister’s insistent wide-eyed stare. (that scene went on longer in this version! in the comic it cuts off sooner and is a dream rather than a daydream)

“Yeah, thinking about Thundercloud, I bet."

“No, it was about fighting,” Dapplepaw protested, long fur prickling. “I’m not like you. I don’t go all moony.”

“Well, it’s time for our warrior ceremony.”

“Already?”

“You’ve been out of camp since sunhigh,” Redpaw pointed out. “Stop being mouse-brained and come back. Unless you’d rather stay—”

“No, no, I’m coming!”

“Well, all right, then!” Dapplepaw scampered after her sister. The Clan was already starting to gather. Lianastar watched balefully from the medicine den; Foxpaw looked disgruntled beside the sick leader. (I did not know what "baleful" meant…that should say "disdainfully"…or maybe she is supposed to be watching evilly? I guess?)

“Graycloud!” Swirledfur yowled from the fallen tree in the center of camp. “Are you satisfied that Redpaw has the skills of a warrior?”

“Yes. Redpaw is ready, and fully deserves this honor.”

Dapplepaw blinked, a horrible realization settling in. Mentors could say their apprentices weren’t ready to be warriors. What if Swirledfur didn’t plan to make her a warrior after all? What if I’m an apprentice FOREVER?

“She as well is ready.” Of course…if she said her apprentice wasn’t ready, it would look like she had been a bad mentor. (look at that lasting conflict!) “Redpaw and Dapplepaw…do you promise to uphold the warrior code and defend SkyClan, even at the cost of your lives?”

“I do,” Dapplepaw mewed, Redpaw echoing her.

“StarClan, I call upon you to look down on these apprentices. They have trained hard in the way of your noble code, and I commend them to you as warriors in their turn.” Leaping down from the tree, Swirledfur continued, “Redpaw, from this moment on you will be known as Redear, in honor of your spirit and loyalty. Dapplepaw, you will be known as Dappleface, in honor of your courage and perseverance.”

Dapplepaw closed her eyes while Swirledfur licked Redpaw’s fur, waiting. But her own lick never came. A couple of cats gasped; not many had noticed, but the few who had all recognized the significance. My ceremony is not complete. And it will never be finished.

The Clan began to chant. “Redear! Dappleface! Redear! Dappleface!”

The vigil would give Dappleface plenty of time to think. Her mind immediately wandered to Swirledfur—particularly at her first Gathering.

When Dappleface had first been apprenticed, Swirledfur didn’t hate her. It was weird now to think of a time when the deputy was nice to her. But when she first became an apprentice, Swirledfur was excited. I was her first apprentice, her chance to become deputy—she’s always wanted to be leader, as she confessed on the day of my sixth moon. Then she changed…I don’t know what it was. But it happened about a half moon later. Right around my first Gathering. She was weird for almost a quarter moon. Careful…guarded. And then she was mean.

She never really came right out and said she hated me, but it was obvious. I was never good enough for her. Even when I caught more prey than Redear, or pinned her down in training. I never understood why—I still don’t.

Firestar.

Firestar had been watching, his gaze roaming the clearing, at that Gathering. Maybe he thought Dappleface wasn’t fit to be a warrior?

But that couldn’t be it. Why would he care? He had much more important things to do… (this plot part never made sense except that Firestar was supposed to have his nose in everyone's business trying to force the will of StarClan)

“No.”

“You can’t stop me.”

“I can tell Tawnystar.” (oh yeah it's always great when I try to obscure cats' identities from the reader)

The cat laughed. “I’d like to see her try and figure me out! She’ll never get proof—just the word of a silly rogue’s son.”

“You are the son of the same rogue.”

“Oh, please…I’m not running around accusing you of anything…won’t she think it’s suspicious to accuse your own kin?”

The other cat stood. “You’re going to be caught someday. I promise you that.”

“We’ll see, Marbleswirl…” He shook his head. “We’ll see.” (oh wow wonder who this could be!)

It was almost time for the Gathering. Lianastar had died that day. Swirledstar hadn’t yet had time to appoint a deputy or receive nine lives, but even from the back of the clearing Dappleface could see her shooting Firestar dirty glances. (no one cares about Lianastar?)

ShadowClan were last to arrive. Tawnystar looked down haughtily from the Great Rock as if challenging someone to call her late.

“ATTACK!”

Redfoot, the WindClan deputy, reared up on his hind paws. “Warriors of the Night, to me!” (a quick note: this turns into a Mudclaw thing, but it wasn't supposed to be; Redfoot was the WindClan deputy, but Firestar was the FlameClan leader, and Redfoot didn't care about Firestar)

Instantly a bunch of gold-and-white cats poured into the clearing. Most looked like family. They were clearly much quicker and stronger than most of the Clan cats. Even outnumbered three to one they seemed to be winning. The back of the clearing was free of them, though, so Dappleface darted through the crowd to the front.

Sure enough, Lazytail was in trouble. One of the rogues had pulled him down by his long, limp tail, and another was attacking him while his guard was down.

But just before she jumped in to help him, Dappleface heard Redfoot speaking.

“Firestar, you fool. How long I’ve waited for this moment!” ("I am a villain! I am a Disney villain!")

“Redfoot—I—I don’t understand!”

“That’s exactly why you are a fool. I lost my chance when Tealstar died. When suddenly…I wasn’t the next leader. Cats from other Clans make fun of me, you know, for being Tealstar’s follower…they say I’m just yesterday’s deputy, the worthless follower of a leader they believe is better dead. But how would they like it if the leader they had followed loyally forever suddenly died…and a sign from StarClan said someone else was to be leader in their place? Once you’re dead, WindClan will have its proper leader. Because, though you concealed it from the rest of the Clan, I know the truth. Smokepaw pretended to have seen the sign, but I saw you talking to him. You were the only one who claimed to see it.” (fun fact: I started a sequel that was going to reveal the truth about Firestar) He hissed. “I’ll kill you as many times as I have to. But when you’re finally dead, WindClan will have a leader they can trust.”

Dappleface and Tawnystar struck at the same moment, sending Redfoot plummeting over the edge of the Great Rock to the battle below. He lay still for a moment, then fled into the woods. The golden cats stopped fighting and dashed after him.

“I already said it was never going to happen.”

“I have told you before, Swirledstar—my decision still stands.” (Firestar you never made a decision you just berated Swirledstar about it)

“And so does mine.”

As we walk, dark clouds cover the moon. And I can’t help but wonder what they were talking about…what decision did Firestar make? And why is Swirledstar opposed to it?

By the time they reached camp there was a heavy downpour together with thunder and lightning.

“And you’re sure about this?”

“Honestly, sis, I can’t see why you’re so worried. It’s just to see what he’s up to. What could happen?”

“Well, yeah…but you know I don’t trust him.” Peachfur hopped after her sister, slowed down by her twisted left forepaw.

“You worry too much.” Yellowtail lashed her tail.

“Maybe. But I still don’t get why we have to leave Clan territory to get there.”

“Look, I’m sorry, but we’re hardly leaving Clan territories. Tawnystar even said it was okay to come.”

“She only said we could come to Highstones. She thinks we want to talk to StarClan.”

“Fine, then. I’ll tell him you chickened out.”

“No, no, I’m coming. I just don’t feel right about lying to Tawnystar, that’s all.”

“Glad you made up your mind—we’re here.” Yellowtail padded into Mothermouth.

“I can barely see,” Peachfur complained.

“I noticed.”

Pain stabbed through Peachfur’s paw. “Ouch!”

“Yeah, there’s a rock on the floor. I kicked it.”

“Why didn’t you say something? It’s not like I can walk on only two paws!”

“Sorry. Hey, look, it’s getting lighter.”

Zebrastripe sat in the entrance to the open cavern. “Good of you two to finally make it.” (huh, I wonder who was talking to Marbleswirl a couple scenes ago)

“This is not a meeting about plans,” Redfoot meowed, pushing in front of the ShadowClan warrior to stand before the she-cats.

“What plans?” Peachfur asked; Yellowtail shushed her.

“This is a meeting to see who will and won’t join beforepaw. (note: a lot of people thought Beforepaw was a character; this was the paw equivalent of "beforehand") There are no important events coming up—this meeting concerns only cats from ShadowClan, WindClan, and outside the territories.”

“Welcome, cats of the moor and pine.” Zebrastripe’s forepaws were up against the Moonstone. “We’ll get more cats later. This is more of an insiders’ things (a possessive and a plural?)—a meeting for all the important cats. WindClan, ShadowClan, and the rogues and loners who traveled to be here.” Peachfur glanced at Yellowtail as he continued, “Because, really, who cares about mangy ThunderClan? Or those mouse-brains, RiverClan? Or foxhearted SkyClan?” He shook his head. “No.”

Zebrastripe pushed back and returned all four paws to the floor of the cave. “Those are the Clans with the glory. We are the ones who will rise. Of course we must recruit some cats from the other Clans; however, I will be sure not to make any mistakes in selecting whom to invite.” His eyes narrowed.

“He’s good at speaking, isn’t he?” Yellowtail whispered to no one in particular.

“We are the cats whose future has been stolen. We are the cats who could have been great , but our chances were snatched. Rogues forced to wander, loners with no chance of recognition, kittypets forced into Twoleg houses…and the Clan cats who are never good enough no matter how many times we prove ourselves.”

Zebrastripe sat and settled down comfortably. “You’re probably all wondering right now why we’re working with the Warriors of the Night.” Peachfur nodded, but Yellowtail didn’t notice.

Redfoot dipped his head. “Understandable.” He stood and addressed the crowd. “The Warriors of the Night are not what they seem. They are not bloodthirsty killers. Think back—did even a single cat die in the battle? We are looking for vengeance on those who have wronged us, and that is all. A means to an end, so to speak.”

“I’m in!” called Yellowtail. “I’m definitely in!” She turned to face her sister. “You’re in, too, right, Peachfur?”

“Well...”

“Please?”

“Maybe…” Peachfur sighed. “All right.”

“Hello! I’m Louie. Who are you?” The speaker was a brown-and-tan-spotted tomcat with pale green eyes. His fur was ragged but not very scarred.

“I’m Peachfur—”

“Hey! Hurry up!” Zebrastripe interrupted. “We don’t want Tawnystar getting worried everyone’s gone so long!”

“Yeah, everyone, let’s go!” Yellowtail cried enthusiastically.

“It’s almost like he doesn’t want us to get to know the other cats,” muttered Peachfur.

“So?”

“It’s just a little suspicious, that’s all.”

“Well, that’s too bad.” Yellowtail flicked her right ear. (who cares what ear it was) “You can’t back out now.”

“I know.”

“I say these words before StarClan, so they may hear and approve my choice: Cloudedfur will be the next deputy of SkyClan.”

Coalpelt cleared his throat and stood. “Swirledstar, the code forbids him from being deputy! He’s never been a mentor.”

“True.” Swirledstar dipped her head. “That is why I’m giving him one now.”

All four of Brightfeather’s kits perked up at this and began to scamper forward. The little ginger-and-white one’s fur was ruffled and dusty, spikier than usual; Brightfeather stared after him in dismay but could do nothing.

“Copperkit, from this moment on until you become a warrior, you will be known as Copperpaw. You will be apprentice to Cloudedfur.”

I overheard Swirledstar saying recently that she wanted to give the young warriors a chance at apprentices. I can think of only three warriors younger than Cloudedfur, and that’s Thundercloud, Redear…and me. So I’m hoping for an apprentice. This could be my only chance. And if I don’t get an apprentice, how am I supposed to become leader one day?

“Skunkkit, Snarekit, and Pollenkit, from this day on until you earn the name of warrior, you will be known as Skunkpaw, Snarepaw, and Pollenpaw. Your mentors will be Thundercloud, Redear, and Butterflytail.”

This isn’t fair. Butterflytail is Cloudedfur’s older littermate. I’m the youngest warrior.

The apprentices and mentors touched noses.

Dappleface blinked. Was Snarepaw…looking at her?

No…of course not.

“AAAAHHH!” Snarepaw charged into the camp.

“What’s wrong?” Passionflower mewed, her tail fluffing out.

“Fox,” he panted, looking exhausted. “Fox on the border! ThunderClan, near RiverClan. With Redear…”

I’ve never fought a fox before…but my sister is in danger. (we know)

Swirledstar, Starcloud, Thundercloud, Cloudedfur, and Passionflower came with Dappleface to find Redear. It looked bad. There was blood everywhere—but Redear was still alive; some of it was from the fox.

Cloudedfur attacked before Swirledstar gave the signal; presumably he thought his position as deputy gave him permission to ignore orders. But Swirledstar couldn’t get mad in the middle of a fight.

“Thundercloud, get Redear out of there. Passionflower, wait for a good opening. Dappleface, Starcloud, now!”

The fox was no match for an entire patrol of cats. By the time they chased it off, Thundercloud and Redear hadn’t gotten far. (I mean Redear is pretty much dying so)

“Dappleface,” Redear managed to say. “Mentor Snarepaw.” (that was fast)

SkyClan tradition said that wounded mentors could choose temporary replacements for their apprentices. Swirledstar clearly didn’t like it; she was silent the entire way back to camp. But Dappleface doubted she’d ignore this tradition. SkyClan may not have been the best Clan in terms of following the code, but breaking tradition was almost as serious a crime, to listen to the elders. And no one wanted to be on the elders’ bad side, not even the leader.

Back at camp, Swirledstar climbed back onto the fallen tree. “Redear will live,” she announced, “but she is in no state to continue training Snarepaw.”

I kind of feel selfish. The thought that I might benefit from my sister’s injuries…

“While I disagree with her choice,” continued Swirledstar, “Redear has requested that her sister Dappleface take over in mentoring her apprentice until she is able to leave the medicine den.” Snarepaw looked up, apparently horrified—he must not have realized the extent of the problem.

Dappleface and Snarepaw touched noses; his was wrinkled in disgust, and he turned and slunk into the apprentices’ den. What’s his problem?

Snarepaw crouched low to the ground. The sky was clear and the stars were bright. “Copperpaw? I’m scared.”

What are they talking about? wondered Dappleface.

“I think ShadowClan’s going to come get me.” (did I forget a scene? did I really have this big of a time skip? what was wrong with me)

“You’re crazy! Why would they do that? They don’t even border us.” Copperpaw giggled. “There’s nothing scary about ShadowClan, you know.”

“I knew you wouldn’t believe me.” He sighed. “Look, it’s nothing, okay? I have to get some sleep. Double training with Autumnpaw tomorrow.” He blinked, his spiky pelt twitching. “Huh?”

Oh, great. He’s noticed me. What now?

“Oh. It’s you.”

“What?”

“Nothing. Really. It’s nothing. I’m going to sleep now.” He brushed past her, lashing his tail.

What was that all about? I’ll figure it out in the morning. (it's always sad when I decide to dislike my main characters)

“Dappleface. Dappleface. Dappleface. Dappleface.” Someone poked her. “Dappleface. Dapple—”

“What?” she moaned, opening her eyes blearily to Passionflower.

“Good, you’re up. We have to go train now.”

“Oh, right, training.” Dappleface hadn’t given much thought to it yet; it had always seemed like nothing. Following the tortoiseshell and white she-cat into the woods, however, she wasn’t quite sure what she would do; hopefully Passionflower had plans.

Passionflower froze. “Did you hear that?” (poor Passionflower with her sensitive hearing)

“Hear what? I mean no.”

“You stay here and train the apprentices,” Passionflower ordered, ignoring Dappleface’s flinch. “I’m going to go see what’s happening.”

“Uh…” Dappleface watched Passionflower leave, then turned and looked at Snarepaw and Autumnpaw, repeating, “Uh…”

“Should we go get some other mentors and apprentices?” Autumnpaw offered. “You know, to help out on your first day?”

“At least someone’s thinking,” mumbled Snarepaw. She’d have to talk to him about rudeness. Maybe he was still worked up about ShadowClan?

“Snarepaw, go get Thundercloud, Butterflytail, and Cloudedfur and their apprentices, if they’re not busy,” she mewed, thinking quickly. As soon as he was out of sight, she turned to the other apprentice. “Autumnpaw, do you know if anything’s bothering Snarepaw?” She was silent for a moment, and Dappleface decided she must not have an idea.

“Oh, just something about you not cheering at his ceremony…” Autumnpaw trailed off uncertainly. “He…thinks you don’t care about his feelings.”

Suddenly it made sense. Except for one thing—“Nothing about…ShadowClan?”

“ShadowClan? No. I could ask him if you want. Why?”

“Just wondering.”

Snarepaw returned with only Thundercloud and Skunkpaw, but training went smoothly enough. Passionflower didn’t return until just after training ended—she seemed to be in shock. Something bad must have happened.

She only said one word: “Genius.”

“I told you already,” Firestar meowed, “I don’t know a thing about it!”

“You’re the one who didn’t like my choice of deputy.” Swirledstar let her fur bush out. “I don’t know whether to believe you.”

“This is what happens when you’re too stubborn to listen to the will of StarClan. It will happen regardless!” (wait did she go off to WindClan to yell at Firestar over this)

“Have it your way,” she snapped. “Fine, I give up…if only to keep more deputies from dying.”

“…The next deputy of SkyClan will be Dappleface.” Then she muttered something about killing Firestar as the Clan began to chant Dappleface’s name. “Then again,” she mused, “I’m already leader; what harm can it do?” She twitched out her fur and announced, “Starcloud will help Dappleface out with her duties.”

Again, Coalpelt raised an objection. “No disrespect intended, but wouldn’t it make more sense to just make him deputy in the first place if he’s going to be doing the work?”

“It certainly would,” Swirledstar agreed. “However, this is apparently ‘StarClan’s will,’ and I have to obey.”

StarClan is on my side? I must be the luckiest cat in the Clans. (this is actually worse than I remembered)

“RiverClan is fishing well. However, rogues have been hunting our land prey.” Smallstar was quite a bit shorter than most of the other leaders, but her pelt shone bright against the black sky. “We’ve found small amounts of WindClan scent on our territory as well. We think it’s Redfoot. If it’s not, I would like to ask Firestar to keep a close watch on his Clan, and keep them out of RiverClan territory. Oh, and one more thing. Strangely, we found another Clan’s scent in our territory. ShadowClan.”

“What?” Tawnystar bared her teeth, hissing in disbelief. “None of my warriors would trespass on any Clan’s territory…much less go out of their way to get to yours for wet paws and the stench of fish!”

“Aw, I’m sorry, Tawnystar. I didn’t mean to accuse you! Maybe we made a mistake…I mean, we don’t smell ShadowClan very often.”

“Smallstar, I know you want to stay ShadowClan’s friend, but you’re not wrong. We’ve smelled them too.”

Tigerstar spoke before Tawnystar could get any more defensive: “Tawnystar, no one’s blaming you. It could be a rogue going in your territory and then to RiverClan. Or maybe it’s just someone in your Clan who likes to wander a bit more than they should. Either way, not your fault.” He looked down at the Clans, strikingly small beside the larger cats. “We found a fox on our territory and drove it away. It went to RiverClan territory; I hope it didn’t give you any trouble.”

Now it was Swirledstar’s turn. “Our deputy, Cloudedfur, disappeared recently. We found…evidence of a battle. The new deputy is Dappleface, who has taken over mentoring Snarepaw due to Redear’s injury.”

“WindClan has nothing to report.”

“ShadowClan has one new apprentice, Willowpaw. Her mentor is Fierylegs.”

It’s not actually that hard to find Willowpaw. She’s a tiny, thin, scared-looking tortoiseshell, sitting behind her new mentor. How could Tawnystar think it was a good idea to let proud, ambitious Fierylegs mentor such a scrawny apprentice? It’s not like he needs it; he already mentored Yellowtail and Snowtail!

…Oops, that’s two apprentices now I’ve forgotten to cheer for. (actually, it's five, but only one of them noticed/cared)

After the Gathering, Dappleface followed Swirledstar, thinking about Firestar. Had he told Swirledstar to make her the deputy? That seemed likely.

Clouds drifted across the sky, but not a single one covered the moon.

“What’s this I hear about new recruits?” Peachfur’s heart sank as Yellowtail nodded importantly.

“Isn’t it great? I got one more from SkyClan—the first one said yes—and I think I almost got through to a couple of RiverClan cats! And if Cloudedfur’s still alive I bet he’ll come. Plus, Bluewhisker looked really mutinous, so if Tigerstar doesn’t die soon she could be swayed.”

“That’s…that’s great news. I’m surprised you found so many.”

“I know, it’s amazing, isn’t it? Plus Zebrastripe was helping, and I bet he got a whole bunch more.”

“Right you are.” He purred, sounding satisfied with himself. “Three from SkyClan, two more WindClan warriors, and a family of rogues I found just outside RiverClan territory. Then there’s a ThunderClan warrior I think is interested, and I’m working on Cindertalon and Orangetalon of RiverClan.” (them! I remember them)

“You were—”

“Listening, yeah.” Zebrastripe smirked.

“I can’t believe wed didn’t see you! Anyway, how’d you get so many?”

I know when I’m wanted…and I still don’t trust him. Yellowtail thinks I’m prejudiced against non-Clanborn cats or something, just because I don’t like him or his sisters. But I’m fine with them. I mean, I was Marbleswirl’s first friend, and I have no problem ith cats like Wildheart or Blackbelly. It’s just Zebrastripe, Nightstripe, and Shadeswirl…there’s something different about them. I don’t like it at all.

One thing’s for sure, though. If this comes to a battle, I know what side I’m on.

Even if it means fighting my own sister.

Gray day after gray day…the weather hasn’t been very cooperative the past week or two. (not that it was good, but there were definitely things that were better in comic format)

Dappleface was patrolling with Swirledstar, Passionflower, Autumnblaze, and Snarepaw. The mottled tan she-cat had received her warrior name a few days before.

“Who’s that?” mewed Autumnblaze, steering the patrol toward the gorge. “There’s someone over there.”

“Good StarClan, that’s Yellowfur!” Swirledstar exclaimed. “What’s she doing on ThunderClan territory?”

“Good, you’re finally here. I was beginning to worry.” Yellowfur was calm.

“Yellowfur, please get out of Thund—”

It happened too quickly for any of them to react. Yellowfur’s claws raked across Swirledstar’s throat; she whirled around and flung the gray-and-cream she-cat into the gorge and the roaring water below.

“Now to dispose of the deputy. I’ve got plans for someone. Someone who wants to be leader even more than you do, Dappleface.”

“Dappleface, run. Get your nine lives and don’t go near the gorge no matter what. I know who she means. Just go. I can handle her.” Passionflower was already starting toward Yellowfur, an unnerving expression in her eyes.

Dappleface took off without thinking. Everything was just too unreal.

Swirledstar…is dead?

The trip to Highstones took a long time, but it all passed in a blur. She didn’t let herself stop and think until she reached Mothermouth. It was pitch black inside. The Moonstone glowed in the light. Dappleface touched her nose to it and waited.

“And if her soul never reaches us?” a pale gray and white she-cat challenged.

“Hey, hey, hey! We’re not alone anymore!”

“Ah, yes—Dappleface. We’ve been waiting. Lianastar?”

The familiar golden tabby and white she-cat padded forward and touched her nose to Dappleface’s head. “With this life I give you the gift of passion. Use it well to fight for what you believe.” The life brought a burst of energy, but at the same time Dappleface felt exhausted, like she’d fought a million battles without resting.

Next it was Moonwhisker’s turn. “With this life I give you the gift of foresight. Use it well to protect your Clan from disaster.” There were shivers down Dappleface’s spine. She saw a forest full of bloodshed and battle—but in the middle there was one safe path, where a sky-colored cat walked through unharmed. (oh hey Moonwhisker died offscreen that's good to know)

Robinstar, the leader before Lianastar, gave Dappleface the gift of loyalty. This was more painful than the others. It sent a static shock through her body and she was about to leap into battle for her Clan.

“Why did that hurt so much?”

“Because it is often difficult to remain loyal.” The gray-and-white cat with starry fur was watching her. “Very difficult indeed. And you have a hard path, harder than many. Watch carefully.” Her eyes flickered and Dappleface was thrown into a scene, where she flickered and shimmered like a ghost. “Ryewhisker and Cloudberry,” the pale cat murmured. “WindClan and RiverClan.”

Scenes passed, mostly of the two together, but a few with just Ryewhisker. And then a battle—a hesitation—and he was dead.

“Poor Ryewhisker,” Dappleface whimpered.

“You must learn from his story.”

“D—Dappleface.”

“Stormpaw?” She remembered him clearly from apprenticeship; the fox that had killed him had nearly taken Thundercloud’s life as well.

“Yeah. I…With this life…I give you the gift…of love. I hope you have better luck with it than I did.” (why)

“Stormpaw—I didn’t realize—”

“It’s okay.”

“It’s good to see you again,” someone meowed. A black-and-white tomcat stepped forward through the stars.

“Father!”

Badgerclaw’s whiskers twitched. “With this life I give you the wisdom to learn from past mistakes.” She felt a deep sadness. It was her own fault…but she knew exactly what went wrong, and she knew how to fix it.

Nightfang, Starcloud and Passionflower’s sister—a longhaired black she-cat with a long white streak on her muzzle—gave Dappleface a life for mentoring, bringing the knowledge that Nightfang would always be by her side as she taught Snarepaw.

Next was Swift Star, a silver tabby she-cat Dappleface had given a squirrel once as an apprentice. She gave the gift of protection. This was the only one so far that hurt as much as loyalty. She could hardly breathe. But she could fight off any enemy for her Clan. (fun fact: Swift Star is the mother of Zebrastripe, Marbleswirl, Shadeswirl, and Nightstripe! in the game she had four other kits but I've forgotten their names)

“I suppose I must give you a life now,” a cream tabby growled. It was Creamstripe, an elder Dappleface remembered from kithood. She was foul-tempered, but she always had the best stories, so it was okay, kind of. “With this life I give you courage. Remember that StarClan will be here always.”

“Eh…and now we reach that problem I was talking about. I guess her soul must have been swept away in the river?...yeah…” The pale gray-and-white cat stepped closer awkwardly. “Basically, Dappleface, I’ve got to give you your ninth life because of extremely unusual circumstances.” She touched her nose to Dappleface’s forehead. “Welcome, Dappleface, deputy of my Clan. With this life I give you the virtues of compassion, devotion, and determination. Use it well as you lead your Clan in the ways of StarClan and the warrior code. I hail you by your new name, Dapplestar…” (Clear Sky did not yet exist, so this was my Sky)

She drew back and continued. “Your old life is no more. You have now received the nine lives of a leader, and StarClan grants you the guardianship of SkyClan. Defend it well; care for young and old; honor your ancestors and the traditions of the warrior code; live each life with pride and dignity.”

The StarClan cats began to chant her name.

Copperpaw bounded out of the camp. “Pollenpaw! Skunkpaw! C’mon! Dapplestar got back from the Moonstone!”

“Cool,” mewed Pollenpaw.

Skunkpaw waved his tail excitedly. “What was it like? What was it like?”

“Sorry, I’m not allowed to tell. But it was very cool. I got to see cats I thought I’d never meet again.” It didn’t even occur to me until now to wonder who the gray cat was! I wish I’d asked.

“Dapplestar!” Autumnblaze led Passionflower closer. “We tracked Yellowfur all over, but we didn’t catch her. (where's that end quotation mark)

“No thanks to you,” Passionflower grunted.

“I told you I was sorry,” she mewed, looking hurt.

“It’s okay,” Dappleface assured them. “If she comes back, we’ll make sure to be safe. No harm done.”

“Oh, good, you’re back! Hey, I have to ask you something.” Thundercloud shifted awkwardly. He waited until the others had wandered away, then swallowed. “What…does Redear think of me…?”

Dappleface was taken aback. She wasn’t sure whether to laugh or not. This was what he had to ask? But at the same time…it hurt. She had liked him even longer than Redear had. It wasn’t fair.

“She…likes you, too,” Dappleface managed. And then she remembered that Thundercloud was a mentor too—for Skunkpaw—and realized she could talk to him. “Do you know if Snarepaw and his siblings are fighting?” (see Dappleface is a good sister too)

“I’m not sure. But I am worried about Snarepaw. He doesn’t spend much time with the other apprentices, and he’s kind of antisocial when he does.”

“Thanks for telling me.”

Now she just had to choose a deputy and she could go back to life as normal. (um, as leader)

“Okay, where’d you get the info this time?” Fierylegs’s thick, sleek fur was fluffed against the night chill.

“I told you already. Zebrastripe told me. And I know he’s not really reliable, but it makes sense.” Willowpaw hurried after her mentor.

“True. Starcloud’s always shown himself a strong warrior, and Swirledstar’s made her enemies…but Yellowfur? Guess anyone can turn traitor…”

It was the quietest patrol Peachfur had been on in a long time. Willowpaw was a member of the Warriors of the Night. She was surprised they hadn’t tried Fierylegs—but then again, despite his pride, he was a hundred percent loyal to his Clan, and definitely not a warrior they wanted on their bad side.

Hopefully Marbleswirl would be able to do something about it.

“All today’s patrols are arranged.” Starcloud nodded and padded away. He didn’t seem to like Dapplestar much.

Oh well; for now she’d have to figure out what was wrong with Snarepaw.

For once he was with other cats—Copperpaw, Skunkpaw, and Autumnblaze—but he was hanging back.

“Hi, Dapplestar!” Copperpaw mewed.

“Oh.” Snarepaw turned away.

“Snarepaw, I need to talk to you.”

“Fine.” He followed her a few steps away. “What do you want?”

“Seriously, Snarepaw, what’s wrong?”

“I told you already! Nothing’s wrong!”

“Snarepaw, stop it. Just tell me.”

“I just told you, it’s nothing! Now go away and leave me alone!”

I want to keep trying, but I know he’s not going to tell me no matter how many times I ask.

Someone’s voice—Foxpelt’s—broke the air. “DAPPLESTAR DAPPLESTAR DAPPLESTAR DAPPLESTAR DAPPLESTAR DAPPLESTAR DAPPLESTAR DAPPLESTAR!”

“Foxpelt?”

“He’s DEAD!”

“What? Who?”

“Graycloud is a traitor,” he babbled.

“Is it Starcloud? It’s Starcloud, isn’t it?” Passionflower asked, suddenly alert.

“Yes! He said, ‘You’re officially over the line, Starcloud.’ Then Starcloud told him to not ‘interfere’ in things he didn’t ‘understand.’ He said he knew enough to interfere—and then they fought, and that’s when Graycloud killed him!” Foxpelt wailed. “And now he’s DEAD!”

“Dapplestar, I have to talk to you,” Passionflower meowed. “Graycloud shouldn’t have killed Starcloud, but it was for the best.”

“What?”

“Do you remember mentoring Snarepaw? How I heard a sound and wouldn’t talk about it?” She shivered. (Passionflower didn't tell anyone except Graycloud)

“Wasn’t that when Cloudedfur died? That was Starcloud’s fault?”

“I’m sorry I didn’t say anything before. But Graycloud and I had it under control. We thought. (just get the guy exiled) Starcloud was taunting Cloudedfur, saying something about raising forces and him being in the way. Starcloud attacked, and Cloudedfur had to try to run away. I’m sorry. I…goodbye. I’m going to WindClan. It was our backup plan. We’re getting out of your way.” Passionflower took off out of the camp.

It was that night that Swirledstar and Cloudedfur returned.

“And now I have to give my lives back?” Dapplestar snarled. She was speaking to the pale cat from before.

“Honestly, Dapplestar, I did not foresee this. But ancient laws govern StarClan, and I am afraid that there can be only one leader.”

“Well…who are you?”

“I am Sky. The youngest Clan founder, and the only one who didn’t fight in the battle.” She lifted her muzzle. “As a founder, I can keep memories of faded spirits, such as Ryewhisker’s…though not those who have faded while in the Dark Forest, unless someone brings them to me. Funny thing; memory carriers can cross boundaries to get them to me, you know.” Sky sighed. “I apologize, but I must take back the lives now. I regretfully rename you Dappleface. Serve your Clan well, as you did before.”

Swirledstar raised her head. “Oh, hi, Dappleface, you’re back. I’m sorry you had to give back your lives.”

“You are?”

“Of course! You’re not the only one with ambition. And I want to apologize for what I was like. I really haven’t been very nice. I was afraid…Firestar said StarClan…that you’d be leader before me; and now I suppose you have.”

“That’s okay.” It really wasn’t, but Dappleface didn’t want to get into an argument right now.

“Hi, Dappleface,” Autumnblaze greeted her.

Moonslash bounded up past Autumnblaze. “Have you seen Snarepaw?”

Coalpelt lifted his head and meowed, “I think he’s near the border. He said he wanted to hunt.”

“Okay, thank you. I haven’t seen him since before sunhigh.” Moonslash glanced upward. “Not much of a sun today, but it’s been a while. Coming, Dappleface?”

“I guess.”

Moonslash chatted a bit on the way there, but Dappleface was too busy brooding to respond very much.

And then they arrived.

Snarepaw was dead.

Someone had torn open his stomach. His blood was everywhere, and his olive green eyes were dull but wide in fear. Dappleface backed away, turned, and raced back to camp.

Another Gathering as a normal warrior, sitting down below the Great Rock. She wanted to know what it was like all the way up there.

“Does anyone know why ThunderClan is late?” Swirledstar inquired.

“I’m not late! You guys are all early!” Bluewhisker led the ThunderClan cats into the clearing with her nose in the air.

“There you are. But where’s Tigerstar?”

“Tigerstar hunts with StarClan now. I am Bluestar.” She sniffed haughtily.

“I’m sorry for your loss.”

Dappleface’s mind wandered and she stopped listening to the leaders; Autumnblaze was talking to some ShadowClan cats, so she decided to go join them.

“Dead? Snarepaw? That’s…that’s terrible,” one of the ShadowClan toms was saying. She’d spoken to him before; it was Zebrastripe.

A yellowish tabby added, “And it’s too bad about Bluestar—I mean, because of Tigerstar. And hey, Dappleface, didn’t you get thrown out by Swirledstar again?”

“I know, it was so unfair,” Autumnblaze agreed.

Zebrastripe’s dark blue eyes lit up. “Hey, would you be interested in trying to make it fair again? You know, getting to be at least deputy for all the stuff you’ve done for your Clan?”

“Really?”

“Sure. Autumnblaze’ll explain.”

“RiverClan is fishing well.” Smallstar’s voice was muted in the back of Dappleface’s mind. “We found more ShadowClan scent. It’s the same warrior every time. Tawnystar, someone’s not obeying orders.”

Tawnystar narrowed her eyes. “ShadowClan—”

“Wait!” shouted Bluestar. “I will speak next.” She shook out her neck fur. “We’ve also been scenting ShadowClan in our territory.”

“ShadowClan has two new warriors, Stormfall and Featherfoot.” (subtle)

“Dappleface was temporarily leader of SkyClan. However, Cloudedfur and I returned and she is now a warrior again. I am most satisfied with how she has done in my absence.”

“Fate has been satisfied, then?” Dumb Firestar.

“Foxpelt is now full medicine cat. Passionflower and Graycloud have left for WindClan.”

“WindClan has nothing to report.” (did I think this was funny…?)

“Think about it,” Zebrastripe urged her as the cats began to leave.

I’ve decided. Not only was Autumnblaze a member of Zebrastripe’s group, but so were Skunkpaw, Copperpaw, Pollenpaw, Orangefoot, and Eaglesky. The cave entrance wasn’t Mothermouth, but it was nearby. There was complete darkness inside.

“SkyClan?” someone meowed in a low voice.

Autumnblaze listed all the SkyClan cats who had come.

“Was that—”

“Redfoot. There was no sign to make Firestar leader. He got his mate Gingerclaw to help him and Smokepelt told the Clan about a sign, so he just wants revenge on Firestar.”

So that’s what he meant…I guess it’s okay I didn’t kill him, then.”

“Hey, Dappleface.” It was Zebrastripe. “You know, I like you, and I’ve been thinking a little…about our goal. I think there are too many different Clans and rogues. No peace. No unity. So I’m thinking two Clans. I don’t have a leader for the second one, though. And then I remembered…you’ve already been a leader. You proved you could do it. Interested?”

“Yes!”

“Great! Now, I’ve got to start the meeting, but afterward we can talk more. Okay?”

“Okay.”

“Quiet! It’s Zebrastripe’s turn to talk!” Yellowtail called from somewhere in the cave.

“Wouldn’t want to lose his voice,” Redfoot muttered quite audibly.

“Okay, we’ve got to keep this stuff secret, got it? Only those with my permission can recruit new members. Otherwise the others might find out. My brother Marbleswirl almost uncovered this, and there’s just too much at stake. He thinks we failed, so that’s no big deal, but it was pretty close.”

“How do we know if we’ve got permission?” Louie asked. (Dappleface shouldn't know who Louie is)

“Trust me. You’ll know. Now, we’ve got to get control, and that’ll…it’ll have to involve fighting. But I don’t want to discuss that right now. First I have to explain the plan for afterward.” He described his plan for the two Clans.

“How will you decide who’s in which Clan?” Peachfur mewed.

“I’ll solve that problem when it comes up, okay? I say we attack at a Gathering, like before. How about the last leaf-fall Gathering before leafbare? That should give us a couple moons yet. We can prepare special tactics for them. Everyone be sure to come. Our next meeting is in one moon, here in this cave.” In a whisper, he told Yellowtail to make everyone leave.

“Everyone out,” she yowled. Slowly cats began to file out through the single exit.

“Dappleface. Not much time. I’m in a hurry. But I didn’t choose you just because of SkyClan. You’re…you’re…I don’t know how to say this, but you’re…different. In a good way, and I like you for it.” Zebrastripe hesitated—she could feel his motion through the still cave air—and then left. (wow romantic)

Somehow she wasn’t jealous of Redear anymore. (come on Dappleface you can't go for better than that)

“Fight my Clanmates?” a pale gold she-cat mewed nervously.

Only one cat responded, a dark gray she-cat with gold ear tips. “Might not be so bad.”

I’m not jealous at all.

Zebrastripe let out a rueful purr. “Nah, you’re right, it was stupid.”

Marbleswirl’s ears pricked up. “Really?”

“Yeah, I guess I wasn’t thinking. I’m sorry.”

“So no plotting?”

“No plotting.”

“Good. Thank you. I’m glad you changed your mind.” (and Marbleswirl just lets it go)

Zebrastripe waited until Marbleswirl padded away and then chuckled.

“He bought it?”

“Everything is going according to plan,” he assured Yellowtail. “We’re safe.”

“Please, please, please tell me you haven’t joined those cats.” Redear looked as if she couldn’t believe what she herself was saying.

“It’s not like you think. I’ve joined them, yeah. But we’re not here to kill. We just want what’s rightfully ours.”

“Zebrastripe is an entitled foxheart with all the good intentions of a badger,” Redear insisted. “He’s using you, all right? He and Yellowtail? They’re thick as thieves. You like her?” (I don't remember this scene being in the comic but I'm glad it's here)

“Not really, no. But I don’t see—”

“I think they’re mates, Dappleface.”

“No, I don’t think so.”

“Whatever you want to believe.” She sighed. “Look, if I can’t stop you…at least try to look out for yourself. Otherwise I’m going to have to explain this to Swirledstar, and…I don’t know how much of a favor I can do you.”

“I’ll be fine.”

“Make sure to collect a lot of moss. Enough for all the elders,” Creamstripe ordered.

“We’re not apprentices!” Orangetalon complained.

“I know, but Otterpaw and Swiftpaw are busy training extra hard—on your own advice.”

Cindertalon groaned. “It’s not our fault ShadowClan is evil!”

“And it’s not our fault Smallstar isn’t talking to ThunderClan about it,” Leopardpool snapped.

“Fine.”

“Cheer up. It shouldn’t take too long.” Creamstripe flicked her tail.

“…Right.” Orangetalon unsheathed and sheathed his claws.

“I think I see Louie,” Cindertalon said the moment they left the camp.

“Yeah, that’s Louie.” The ragged-furred tomcat was sitting under a tree grooming his paw.

“Cindertalon! Orangetalon! I have something really important to tell you!” He stood up. “I’m quitting. You guys do whatever you want, but me, I’m out. This is getting into some heavy stuff, and I’m not here for your civil wars.”

“Zebrastripe is evil!” Cindertalon snarled.

“We’re not part of the Warriors of the Night anymore,” Orangetalon growled. “And it’s great for your own sake that neither are you.”

“Smallstar won’t break ‘peace’ without proof. You can tell her about it. She doesn’t know whether she can trust us because we’re lazy and ‘always causing trouble.’ But she’ll believe you.” (why would she believe a rogue/loner over her own warriors)

“I’m not going to your camp and that’s that.” He sat back down sniffily.

“At least do something,” Cindertalon pleaded.

“I’ll think about it.”

“So I guess tomorrow is the last Gathering before the attack.” Dappleface and Zebrastripe gazed up at the stars.

Zebrastripe sighed. “Yeah…it’s too bad we have to go to such extremes. It’s…only a means to an end, and the forest will be better off in the end.”

They sat in silence for a while.

“You know, Swirledstar never finished my warrior ceremony.”

“Really?” Zebrastripe stood up slowly and touched his nose to Dappleface’s forehead, then licked her.

The ceremony was finished; she was now a warrior. A Warrior of the Night, completing her ceremony under the stars.

“Thank you,” she mewed. “Thank you so much.”

“No problem.”

The cats in StarClan definitely saw a problem.

“What are they up to?” Thunder snarled in disgust. “SkyClan and ShadowClan together! The very idea!” (they're treating this like a soap opera)

“Love can unfortunately do many strange things, Thunder,” Sky reminded him sadly.

“Believe me, we’re not thrilled about it either.” Shadow’s fur was ruffled against the cold.

Wind shook her head. “I’m more concerned about why they hide in the cave all the time. Them and a bunch of other cats, underground where we don’t see. I think they’re hiding something.” (nice exposition 2/3 of the way through the story) (wait it's not 2/3 is it)

“I don’t like this,” Thunder maintained. “I don’t trust them at all.”

It was the Gathering. One moon of peace left—if everything went according to plan. Peachfur wasn’t sure it would.

“RiverClan—”

“Don’t start!” Peachfur commanded.

The leaders stared down at her in disbelief. Bluestar was the first to speak. “Why not?”

“Because there are Warriors of the Night here at this Gathering!”

The silence was deafening.

“So it’s true,” Smallstar mewed.

“They were going to attack next moon,” Willowpaw announced.

“What are you doing?” Zebrastripe snarled. Beside him, Marbleswirl’s expression was becoming increasingly angry and shocked.

“I can even tell you some of the cats,” Peachfur continued, and began listing names. “There’s Zebrastripe, Nightstripe, Shadeswirl, Yellowgaze, a bunch of rogues, Skunkpaw…” Please don’t say my name. (this worked better in the comic; in the story I just switched POV in the middle of a scene, but the comic could get away with it by virtue of being pictures) “Pollenpaw, Wolfeyes, Sunfeather, Redwhisker, Rowantail, Eaglesky, Whiteclaw, Snowpelt, Dappleface, Darkshadow, and probably a whole lot more I don’t even know!”

“Dappleface! You’re in charge while I go get some of the rogues!” Zebrastripe charged away.

“Forget what he said. I’m in charge!” But Yellowtail’s announcement was immediately followed by her death as Marbleswirl pounced. (there are a lot of one-hit kills in this thing)

I guess I’m in charge after all, then.

Marbleswirl was fast—but Dappleface was faster.

Darkshadow snapped at her. “Don’t forget—this whole thing is for Firestar!”

In her confusion, she misstepped, and Marbleswirl landed a heavy blow on her face. He tricked me! He distracted me! I guess he only wants to get WindClan…the others are fine…traitor. (remember, Darkshadow is the one who tried to sneak nine lives when the leader died, because it's first-come-first-served in this continuity, I guess)

“Got the rogues,” Zebrastripe announced. Good. We could use some help right now.

A bright red ginger tabby she-cat pounced at Splashfire. Bouncemint of WindClan knocked the cat out of the air and began to pummel her with his forepaws.

Fang was going for Firedash by the Great Rock. Creamstripe shouted after him, “Hey! That’s a medicine cat!” Realizing there were now several pairs of eyes on her, she shrank down. “I—”

“Don’t worry, I’ve got him.” Leopardpool raced in to help.

“All right, anyone else going to volunteer or can I just attack already?” Fang complained, charging at Leopardpool.

I have to find Marbleswirl and finish our…dispute.

“I won’t fight you,” Swirledstar was snarling at Skunkpaw and Pollenpaw, who both looked confused. Or should I kill her instead? “You’re just apprentices. Get out before you get hurt.”

“Kill her and be done with it,” a Warrior of the Night snapped at the apprentices.

“No,” said Skunkpaw.

“We won’t.”

“Then I’ll kill you, traitors!” howled Day’s End; Swirledstar rose to meet him and the apprentices cowered at the edge of the clearing.

I’ll leave Swirledstar to Day’s End and Fang and whoever…now where is Marbleswirl?

“DAPPLEFACE!” Zebrastripe cried. Marbleswirl had pinned him down.

“Zebrastripe,” she called, but the longhaired tomcat had already landed a killing blow, looking horrified at what he was doing.

No! A gray-and-white RiverClan apprentice attacked Dapplestar from behind.

“It’s okay,” Hornet assured her, smacking the smaller cat down.

“We’ll help.” Wren looked up from her fight for just a moment to nod at Dappleface.

“Yeah, you’re the leader!” Sunfeather sounded slightly nauseated from the fighting.

And honestly, I’m glad Wren is on my side. I certainly wouldn’t want to fight against her. The same goes for Hornet. And even Sunfeather, I suppose.

For a wonderful moment it looks like victory is absolutely certain.

A cream-and-gray paw. A set of bloody claws. A single strike.

And nothing. (the "nothing" is page 490 of the comic, but don't worry, it's one panel per page)

“Dappleface?”

The blackness had not relented.

“Dappleface.”

She was on the ground. Spongy ground. Not like Fourtrees at all.

“Dappleface, get up.”

She finally managed to open her eyes. “Am I…dead?” She blinked, but her surroundings still swam fuzzily before her. “This doesn’t look like StarClan.”

“That’s because,” Zebrastripe meowed gravely, “it’s not.”

“You mean—”

“Even StarClan misunderstands.” He nodded, dark clouds swimming and swirling in his pupils. “This is the Dark Forest. They think we’re evil.” (this time there should not be end quotation marks, because…

“I’m afraid some of our former friends have…gone sour since death. They’ve come up with a very different sort of plan.”

As if to illustrate his point, Pantherclaw materialized, his pelt shimmering with life. “What is this place?” he asked, looking around with interest. He must be sleeping—how long had Dappleface lay (lain) unconscious in the Dark Forest?

“Kill him!” Yellowtail ordered, and Nightstripe leapt down from a tree, snapping Pantherclaw’s back on impact and sinking her teeth into his neck until a bone snapped there too.

Zebrastripe said nothing. Dappleface couldn’t see his expression, but from his stiffness she knew he was gazing stonily at the limp body of Pantherclaw as the tom’s shimmering spirit stepped out of it. Instantly the Dark Forest warriors struck again, shadowy fangs tearing at his starlit fur. Dappleface heard him fall again; the attackers retreated, and she watched his spirit slowly dissipate.

“Hi…I’m Cynder.” A small black cat crept out of the bushes. “He’s lying, you know. I can say more later, but not while he’s here.”

Zebrastripe had of course heard everything. “Go away, Cynder. No one listens to a murderer. Anyway, Dappleface, that’s really it. I’m going to try to assemble fighters to break into the real world and try again. StarClan cats appear there all the time; there’s no reason we can’t do the same.”

He padded away and Dappleface was alone with unfamiliar cats.

“I’m Cascadefrost,” mewed a large silvery she-cat with white speckles. “I heard him call you Dappleface. What Clan?”

“Sky.”

“And you’ll forget about that stupid Clan if you know what’s good for you!”

“Obviously I don’t know, or I wouldn’t be here, now, would I?”

“C’mon,” a tomcat meowed. “Let’s decide the next cat.” He was a ginger-cream tabby with dark marks across his eyes. “Maybe a RiverClan cat?”

“Dappleface,” Cynder whispered. “Listen quickly. Zebrastripe lied to you.” Redear was right… “We Dark Forest cats see underground and in caves—where there isn’t enough light for StarClan. He doesn’t care about you, and he only loves Yellowtail. If he wins he won’t need you anymore. And then he’ll stop pretending.”

“He called you a murderer.”

“It wasn’t me, honestly! I’m already dead—why would I bother lying at this point? But I guess StarClan didn’t believe me. So I know how it feels to be punished when it isn’t even your fault.” (I guess in light of Ashfur this isn't as nonsensical as it seems, but still)

She ran off. The other Dark Forest cats had left too. Dappleface still wanted to believe Zebrastripe, but being completely alone really didn’t help her to be confident in her instincts.

“Dappleface,” someone whispered. It was the last cat she could have expected to see. “I have a message from Sky.” Snarepaw was mostly hidden behind a bush, but his fur glowed bright with stars, and his pupils looked like the night sky. “See, when cats die who believe in StarClan, the five founders vote on whether they can be there or not. Sky voted for you…but none of the others did. She wanted to apologize.”

“It’s okay,” she mewed, not meaning it.

“With any luck I’ll get back to StarClan before anyone finds me. Bye.”

I hope he gets back safely. (wow, you sure sound sincere)

Dappleface supposed it was the next day when she decided to find Zebrastripe. It was hard to tell how much time had passed with no sun, moon, or stars.

Suddenly she felt weird, as if she wasn’t herself anymore. The sensation was familiar—almost. It was like the memory of Ryewhisker, but this time she was the cat. Snarepaw.

He must have been killed—that was the memory of his life! I’d better be careful and give it—I can give—I’ll take his memory to Sky! Sky, in StarClan! I’ll get to go to StarClan! Just for a little while, of course, but it’s still a wonderful opportunity. StarClan!

I bet no one would mind if I saw the memory first…

Dappleface could hear her own thoughts and Snarepaw’s. It was a little unsettling, but she could get used to it. She fought the memories, speeding through them, until she found one she recognized: his apprentice ceremony. She hadn’t cheered. He didn’t like her.

He wanted Autumnpaw to like him. That was clear. She fought forward a little more.

He gave up trying to be impressive. He was just going to be normal.

But there was Yellowtail, threatening him to join the Warriors of the Night. That would explain his fear of ShadowClan. I’m such a mouse-brain. Fear of ShadowClan—ShadowClan Warriors of the Night—all of his siblings were part of it… (uh, yeah)

There was a Gathering. Autumnpaw—or was she Autumnblaze yet? No, he had died before she had any Gatherings as a warrior. “So are you joining or not?” she was asking.

“Uh—um—okay…” he meowed. She could see his thoughts: I thought I loved her. But now…now I just…I suddenly don’t anymore.

There were memories of Dappleface. Of how she was annoying, and didn’t care. She wanted to go back in time and fix things.

Willowpaw? This looked important. “Hello? I’m Willowpaw. I saw you before we came in here.”

“Hi.”

“No one will miss us if we sneak out now. I sneak out every time.”

“We can leave?”

“Yeah, they never notice. I just come back at the end of the meeting. I don’t want to be here either.”

His thoughts were like Dappleface’s had been. He didn’t care about Autumnpaw anymore. Willowpaw had immediately caught his attention. Shadow and sky. (there did not need to be romance!!!)

“Thanks for getting me out.”

“No problem.” The sky was gray and cloudy.

“Why did you choose me? We can’t be the only ones who don’t like it here.”

“You looked lost. And it’s not like I’d pick that awful Copperpaw.” I’m not going to mention Copperpaw’s my sister. Because, honestly, she is awful. And also because I don’t want Willowpaw to feel bad.

More memories of the Warriors of the Night. Was this all? Was it just going to end with a rogue attack? (was there no scent)

“It’s next time, Willowpaw,” he said. Dappleface paid closer attention. “Next meeting. And then we’ll be okay.” Next time?

“Don’t worry. I’ll help you if anything happens.”

“Thank you. Just be careful, all right?”

“You too.”

And then Snarepaw was all alone, talking to himself in the forest. “Tomorrow I’m a hero. I’m going to kill him. All I have to do is get there first and wait in the darkness. There’ll be enough scent to cover me up. And then when he gets there—I’ll be listening—I just jump up and slit his throat. Then we’ll be safe. No more Zebrastripe, no more Warriors of the Night.” (Snarepaw stop sitting in the forest talking to yourself)

It was Zebrastripe who killed him.

Dappleface’s own memory swept her in. “Dead? Snarepaw? That’s…that’s terrible.” Everything Zebrastripe said that night now took on more meaning.

I have to go warn—

He was dead.

Zebrastripe killed Snarepaw.

I don’t know what to think now…

Zebrastripe killed him.

First things first: memories to Sky.

The starry border greeted her. This could be the last time I ever see it. I won’t be able to find it after giving up Snarepaw’s memory.

“Dark Forest? How’d you get in here? …Memories?” The light gray she-cat padded forward and sniffed the air tentatively. She licked her fuzzy white chest fur flat.

“Snarepaw. My old apprentice. He came with a message, but Yellowtail killed him.”

“Mistwake and I can take you to the Clan leaders.”

“Don’t worry, it’s close,” Mistwake, a gray spotted she-cat, assured her.

“HEY!” Shadow dashed forward. “You’re from the Dark Forest! Get out of here!”

“She needs to see Sky. Let her pass.”

“When badgers fly!”

“Ah, but they do!” Mistwake cocked her head. “I think you’re forgetting.”

The other cat whispered to Dappleface, “She died when a badger jumped into the elders’ den and broke it.” (remember, these cats were submitted characters)

“What’s going on?” Sky stopped behind Shadow. “Dappleface!? Oh…oh no…Snarepaw died? I knew it was dangerous…but we thought—”

“I brought you his memories.”

Sky glowed brighter than the stars for a moment as Dappleface gave her the memories. “Thank you. I’m sorry, but you must return now.”

“Wait. I have a friend. A rogue. She was framed for murder and got sent to the Dark Forest. Can you let her in?”

“Maybe. I’ll have to see her, though. I can try looking through the Starless Pool. We can see into the Place of No Stars from there. You could lead me to her that way.” (every single moment of this story was so contrived)

“Dappleface! There you are! Yellowtail and I have been looking every—”

“Are you mates?” The words left her mouth before she could stop them.

“I…” Zebrastripe sighed. “Yeah, you got me. Yellowtail is my mate.”

“You’re a sneaking, conniving little SkyClan cat; what makes you think any ShadowClan warrior would ever fall for you?” Yellowtail mewed.

“We could just get Cascadefrost and the others over here and have ’em kill her like the others,” Zebrastripe suggested.

“Firestar’s lie made Redfoot mad. But there was nothing he could do—because his lie gave him power. But lies work both ways.”

“You’re speaking nonsense,” Zebrastripe warned.

“Redfoot at least wanted justice, but all you want is power. And you lied to me so I would help you. And now there’s nothing that says I’m not allowed to have my own revenge.”

“There’s me.” Yellowtail stationed herself between Dappleface and Zebrastripe.

Dappleface lashed out a paw, tearing out Yellowtail’s throat. She hadn’t realized how much power there was in her forelegs. Not anymore. (apparently cats are just claws and vulnerable skin)

“And now for you.”

“You won’t win.” Zebrastripe’s face was contorted with rage.

Sky watched from the Starlight Pool. “Wind! River! Come here and see this!”

“Maybe I will,” Dappleface snarled at the tom. She scored her claws over his face and dodged as he tried to mirror the move. He was no better than Marbleswirl—obviously, since Marbleswirl managed to kill him. Unfortunately I’m not better than Marbleswirl either.

“You can’t kill me,” she snarled. “You’re far too slow.”

“I think you’ll find you’re the one who’s too slow.”

“Really?”

“Obviously.” He flung her to the ground. “Because this is the second time I’ve pinned you.”

“It should have been Thundercloud the whole time!” she mewed. It was the only thing that readily came to mind. “But you made Willowpaw mad and RiverClan ate a squirrel—ThunderClan are foggy frogs.” She didn’t even try to make sense of what she was saying. (uh, I forgot about this part)

But Zebrastripe did. He hesitated, confused. “What?”

“Dappleface!” Cynder burst into the clearing. Thank StarClan; now I don’t have to go find her!

“Get out of here,” Zebrastripe snapped, turning his head to look at her.

Dappleface struck. In one motion she sat up and sank her teeth into the black-and-white tomcat’s throat.

He faded slowly and disappeared.

I did it.

He’s gone forever.

“Cynder, come on.” The little black cat’s pupils were gradually clearing of stormclouds, revealing a starry night sky behind. “I got you into StarClan. Sky let you in. It’s this direction. But only you can see the StarClan border, so tell me when you can see it.”

“Shadow! Thunder! River! Wind! You have to see this right now!” (it's soap opera time)

River swished his tail, not budging. “Eh. Sure. Whatever…go ahead; you win.”

“RIVER!”

“Shut up, Thunder, Wind will agree!”

“I sure as the Dark Forest won’t! I’m with Sky on this one.”

“Well, for once, I’m with Shadow.”

“Wasn’t the little one enough, Sky? I think you’ve gone soft. Unfit for this job.” Shadow bared her teeth. “You know things are bad if Thunder and I are together.”

“The vote has been cast!”

Neither of us has much to say on the way to StarClan. It doesn’t take long, though.

“It’s StarClan!” Cynder announced. Dappleface watched her bound toward the stars. She turned and mewed, “Thank you so much! I’ll try to help you if I can!”

Dappleface stared at StarClan—and then it hit her.

She looked at her paws. They were shining.

Her reflection was distorted in the grim, murky water. But leaning close she saw starlight dancing in her pupils.

Wait…

I can’t believe it.

“Hey, Cynder! Wait up!”

I’m going to StarClan! (yay)

misc. Dappled Leaves art

SPOILER: Click to show

Six of my favorite characters: Snarepaw, Willowpaw, Peachfur, Fierylegs, Tawnystar, and Marbleswirl. I thought "chibis" were all the rage, so I tried it out. That was a bad idea.
Image created and last modified 4/17/2012.

Willowpaw and Snarepaw again.

This is the scene where Peachfur reveals the Warriors of the Night a moon early at the Gathering. On the left are the deputies (I guess I decided Cloudedfur never returned? maybe I just forgot) Dappleface, Lazytail, and Bluewhisker (who I thought was leader by this point?). Obviously the cat with the twisted paw is Peachfur. The tabby beside her is Yellowtail. The calico is Fierylegs. The other two are Graycloud and Zebrastripe.

Now, this suggests a very different ending! I can't tell if I drew this beforehand and changed my mind when making the comic or if this was drawn afterward as a sort of vent art (or retcon). From the cloudy black eyes, you can tell Zebrastar, Shadeswirl, Redfoot, Yellowgaze (!!!), the unlabeled cat (who is probably Nightstripe), Skunkpaw, and Copperpaw are in the Dark Forest. It's hard to tell with Dapplestar, but it looks to me as if she's supposed to be alive? Peachfur and Redear are in StarClan, which you can tell from the white speckles in their eyes.

How old is this thing!? When did Marbleswirl have hair!?

This was a page of Falling Petals that I decided to draw out of order. Falling Petals was the sequel to Dappled Leaves, and I actually got fairly far into a digital version (part of me wants to return to it, but I'm worried it doesn't make any sense). I guess this technically spoils the story, but who cares?

Falling Petals spoiled

SPOILER: Click to show

The plot of Falling Petals was that a StarClan cat came to Cinderstreak, medicine cat of WindClan, and said he had a prophecy. However, because Rockpelt hated prophecies, he would just tell her what it meant: WindClan's next leader was a cat with a flower for a name. Cinderstreak was sort of like, "Okay, thanks, useless guy," but she told Firestar about it anyway.

Firestar likes to meddle with fate to make it suit him best. Remember that Redfoot, at least, believes Firestar faked the sign to become the next leader. He has Gingerclaw step down from being deputy because of having kits, but they make it permanent, because they're both worried that if she does not step down, she will die due to fate requiring someone else to become deputy. Firestar appoints Passionflower deputy, but she declines, so he chooses Hazelfur and gives her Hollypaw to mentor.

There keep being scenes where Firestar and his mate-and-former-deputy Gingerclaw debate with each other and argue with Cinderstreak about the "prophecy." At some point they talk about how it might be Violetheart, but it turns out Cinderstreak had a vision in the flowers that the cat in question was a kit when she received the "prophecy," which makes no sense at all but sure why not.

Rockpaw, Hollypaw, and Blazingpaw become apprentices. Rockpaw's friend Featherpaw is a jerk; Rockpaw is always like "whoa, Featherpaw, that was kind of rude" but never stands up to her. Featherpaw outright bullies Hollypaw and would do the same to Blazingpaw if he hung out with Rockpaw more often, because Featherpaw and Rockpaw are moor-runners while Blazingpaw and Hollypaw are tunnelers.

The seasonal loners (obviously not the same ones from canon, but that same tradition) come to stay with them.

Rockpaw meets every now and then with Cloudpaw of ThunderClan at Fourtrees during the night.

Four former Warriors of the Night--or more accurately two former Warriors of the Night and two kits of other former Warriors of the Night--join WindClan. Lionpaw becomes a moor-runner. Hollypaw has an obvious crush on him.

At one point Passionflower runs off during training, and it turns out she heard Violetheart fighting off Redfoot and Autumnblaze (Passionflower's former apprentice who betrayed SkyClan to fight alongside the Warriors of the Night--I think Autumnblaze is still in SkyClan; many cats who betrayed their Clans still got to stay in them and were simply punished).

The Firestar scenes keep happening. Hazelfur is revealed to be spying; she knows that she is the fodder deputy who might have to die for destiny to happen to the right cat. Hollypaw notices Hazelfur spying and also spies.

Hollypaw almost dies because she gets reckless in the tunnels. Lionpaw saves her.

Cloudheart of ThunderClan gets his warrior name.

One of the seasonal loners is physically incapable of running. Featherpaw is a jerk about it. Foxfoot starts being a jerk about the loners and about Bouncemint (the fan character), Passionflower, Graycloud, Snowdrift, Rabbitpatch, Lionpaw, and Sunkit because they're not from WindClan (he's okay with Feathersong only because she grew up in WindClan; he says he doesn't like that a former kittypet is in the Clan but since she was raised in WindClan he'll accept her). Hazelfur defends Passionflower, the loners join in to defend the other non-WindClan-born cats, and Foxfoot and the loner Nimbus almost get into a fight. Passionflower shouts him down, and he says he won't kill Nimbus right then and there because it might give Lionpaw ideas.

At some point Feathersong and Rockpaw stop being friends.

During her assessment to become a warrior, Lionpaw chases a rabbit into the tunnels and ends up lost somewhere. He hears cats talking. Autumnblaze is making fun of Redfoot, and Copperfrost (SkyClan), Hornet (fan-submitted rogue/loner), Hazelfur, and someone with dark brown words who isn't from the Clans are there too. Autumnblaze explains that Firestar faked a sign to become leader, but she continues to make fun of Redfoot for being "bent out of shape" that Firestar is still alive when the whole goal of the Warriors of the Night was to kill Firestar because Redfoot is pathetic.

Of course, Lionpaw doesn't recognize any of their voices. He follows Hazelfur's scent back to WindClan territory, although he can't smell that it's specifically her, just a WindClan cat, and loses her scent once he reaches camp.

Firestar is a ridiculous mouse-brain. For someone who likes to control fate he really doesn't do much controlling. He names the new warriors Hollyhawk, Rockrose, Lionlight, and Blazingclaw. Hollyhawk lampshades while thinking during her vigil that if he wanted to have a ready-made flower name cat, he should have chosen either "hollyhock" or "rockrose." He also gives both of them apprentices (Hollyhawk gets Pebblepaw; Rockrose gets Fernpaw).

The next day Rockrose is too tired from her vigil to train, but Graycloud and Swift take her on the tour. Rockrose takes a nap, and some vague StarClan cat tells her not to judge "him" too harshly, because "he" didn't mean to lie.

Rockrose sees her first snow. Hazelfur yells at Rockrose and Feathersong for being in the camp and tells them to go hunt at Highstones. Feathersong wants to climb up Highstones.

That was 270 pages/panels. It was not planned in much detail, but I was doing my best to hit 600 pages exactly for the ending, just like I did with Dappled Leaves.

After that, the basic plot is:

Some stuff happens. Feathersong is still a jerk. Rockrose breaks off the relationship with Cloudheart for fear of being caught.

A hawk feather shows up right outside the leader's den. Firestar demotes Hazelfur and names Hollyhawk deputy. Hollyhawk proudly tells her sister that it was because of a prophecy. Rockrose is amazed but also kind of sad because she technically qualified too. Feathersong is furious and tries to make Rockrose turn on Hollyhawk, but Rockrose essentially runs away and won't talk to Feathersong anymore.

Redfoot is killed. Hazelfur becomes leader of the remnants of the WotN and declares it HazelClan and herself Hazelstar. In this version she does not get nine lives, because declaring a group of cats a Clan is not accepted by StarClan in story continuity.

Rockrose finds out that Hollyhawk put the hawk feather there. She isn't sure what to do. Hollyhawk already has somewhat of a guilty conscience from faking the sign, but "guilty conscience" is Rockrose's default state, and Feathersong eventually pressures her into telling.

Firestar doesn't seem fazed by the news that Hollyhawk faked the sign, but Feathersong tells the whole Clan, and Hollyhawk isn't a good enough liar to convince them Feathersong is lying. Once the news becomes common knowledge, Firestar demotes her and says that Rockrose can be deputy.

Feathersong tries to use Rockrose's position as deputy to influence her and is frustrated by the lack of actual power the deputy seems to have.

Hollyhawk and Lionlight end up together even though she lied about the sign.

Rockrose finds out that Firestar did fake his own sign to be leader, but he did it because of a real StarClan dream. She tells Feathersong this, but Feathersong refuses to spread the rumor, so she tells Hollyhawk and then Cinderstreak. Cinderstreak is not surprised. Rockrose doesn't want to be deputy in a corrupt Clan but decides that either she really was chosen by StarClan (and therefore if she steps down someone else is in danger) or she wasn't and she won't be leader anyway because destiny says someone else will be, so she doesn't step down.

At some point Hazelstar leads the attack on WindClan. This time, although the new WotN are still defeated, they do manage to kill Firestar. Rockrose could become leader, but she tells the Clan she understands the prophecy (which most of them have never heard of) and tells Blazingclaw to go be leader. Of course, blazing star is what the prophecy meant. Firestar misses the obvious sometimes.

Also, if you know your flowers, on the cover and the page where Cinderstreak describes her vision, the flowers are blazing stars.

DL update art 7/1 (poorly drawn blood)

SPOILER: Click to show

created and modified 5/28/12

Dapplestar: Am I…dead? This doesn't look like StarClan.
Zebraheart: That's because…it's not.

oil pastel scanned 3/12/12

created and modified 5/12/12

What's a collection of old fanart without some Evanescence lyrics?

created and modified 4/12/12

I think this might be a picture from the actual comic with a different background added?

oil pastel scanned 3/12/12

scanned 2/27/12

look Snarepaw was my favorite okay

oil pastel scanned 3/12/12

of course there's an oil Snarepaw

created and modified 5/4/12; drawn on MS Paint at school

are you tired of seeing Snarepaw yet

created and modified 1/30/12

not tired enough

oil pastel scanned 3/12/12

see I told you I liked her

oil pastel scanned 3/12/12

I really liked oil pastels but I technically didn't know how to use them

oil pastel scanned 3/12/12

see his ear would be more noticeable if it were still yellow instead of white

created and modified 4/24/12

is that enough Snarepaws for you? never!!!!!

scanned 11/27/11

wait what the heck FP was planned back in 2011!? also more importantly I could draw like this in 2011!? anyway this is Rockrose, Feathersong, and Hollyhawk from Falling Petals; Rockrose is shocked (it looks like she was initially supposed to be a jerk alongside Feathersong?), Feathersong is dismayed, and Hollyhawk (who I never finished coloring in) is nervous that they'll figure out the feather isn't a real sign

Genderqueer

tiger beetle

Warrior Fanatic

=^ò.ó^=

Pronouns: all (default they)

other old fanfictions update 7/4 Jun 15, 2017 21:11:56 GMT -5 wadevvilson likes this

Quote

Post by tiger beetle on Jun 15, 2017 21:11:56 GMT -5

Time (document "time" created 10/5/2013 and last modified 2/8/2014)

SPOILER: Click to show

-time-
the story of briar and thunder

(fun fact! all Briar chapters were lavender, and all Thunder chapters were pale pink; additionally, the chapter heading images were sort of…in the chapters? with text aligned to the left of Briar headings and to the right of Thunder headings)

part 1: BRIAR (why didn't I save the urls for the chapter heading images!?)
MarshClan. Early greenleaf.

Briarkit crouched beside the nursery. Willowstar was speaking: “…Do you promise to uphold and defend the warrior code and protect MarshClan, even at the cost of your life?”

“I do.” Silverpaw spoke with calm fury—not that Briarkit recognized it as such. (then why did I point it out)

“Then by the powers of StarClan, I give you your warrior name. You will be known as Silverheart in honor of your courage and loyalty.” Willowstar licked the top of Silverheart’s head, as was customary, then returned to the pinnacle of the Stone Perch, which served as the camp center and vantage point. (finally it's not the highstone) “But your vigil can wait. We have more urgent matters to attend to. Barkfang!”

Briarkit was of course not entirely unaware of MarshClan’s troubles. As any kit, she had been taught that there were enemies; at this point in MarshClan’s history, it was also important to explain that the enemies would like to steal her.

It was for this reason she was not surprised at Barkfang’s words: “It was a BlazeClan ambush. We were deep in our own territory. They stole all of our prey. We had to return empty-pawed.” Barkfang was not a talented speaker, but the fresh scratches across his shoulders spoke for him. The battle had been decidedly dangerous. (what's with this pretentious language)

“Those filthy liars! Cowards! Savages!” This was Thunderkit. He was not Briarkit’s brother—she had no littermates—but save for bloodline he may as well have been such. “Well, I’ll teach them. One day!” He did not seem to notice the silencing glares the warriors were cutting him. “We should go kill them!”

(remember how I wrote RockClan Calls in a petty way because of a sort-of-friend? it's explanation time!

(that same friend got me to join FeralHeart and join a Clan with her (SilentClan? maybe SilverClan); I was Briarkit, and she was…Tigerkit, I think? SilentClan or whatever it was was "at war" with ShatteredClan, which was a huge Clan that basically battled all the other Clans and stole kits from them

this sort-of-friend would talk to me during school about how everyone who roleplayed as a ShatteredClan cat was evil and how she hated them because she had left her evil phase behind and was a good-hearted warrior

the first major thing that happened while I was in the Clan was that there was a battle with ShatteredClan, and she had her kit character participate in the battle, nearly killing an apprentice named Blackpaw

but one day I got on and I had been kicked out of SilentClan for no reason! I looked for ShatteredClan (to be petty toward the sort-of-friend) but I couldn't find them so I ended up joining their ally, Rogue Heaven…I told my sort-of-friend about it and she was really disappointed in me)

“Hush, Thunderkit,” growled Willowstar. Her rather large paws shifted as if she would like to unsheathe her claws. “This meeting is for cats over six moons.”

“And honorable warriors do not kill.”

Thunderkit ignored Willowstar, addressing only Rustytail. “BlazeClan is outside the code!”

“I said hush!” Losing her composure, Willowstar stared directly at Shadowspots, the mother of Thunderkit and Juniperkit. Shadowspots carried Thunderkit into the nursery; Briarkit followed.

“I don’t know why they don’t teach us sooner,” complained Thunderkit. “If they taught me to fight, I’d kill all the BlazeClan cats I saw. StarClan, I’d kill them right now if I had the chance!” (well you sure aren't big on the code)

Juniperkit shook his head. “They would kill you first. Don’t you remember what they do to kits?”

In addition to stealing kits, BlazeClan was not entirely opposed to harming them. Silverheart’s sister Cloudpaw had been stolen and imprisoned on her first day of apprenticeship, and had not been seen since. (this was a plot point in FH but not well integrated into the story)

“We can practice,” Civetkit suggested. She swished her plumed tail in feigned aggressiveness—it was meant to be a threatening lash, but she was too young to achieve that effect.

Spiderkit and Wolfkit, Civetkit’s littermates, were asleep, so Juniperkit and Briarkit declined. Thunderkit grudgingly accepted he had to be quiet, meowing, “Well, I don’t think this is a very smart way of doing things.”

“I don’t want to be ripped to pieces by a warrior before I’m even six moons old,” Civetkit pointed out.

“But it’s not your age that matters, it’s your experience,” Thunderkit insisted.

“Yeah, which means you think about things before doing them,” Juniperkit scoffed. (nice try)

“I’m thinking about sleeping,” Civetkit mewed.

Juniperkit didn’t even bother to redeem this with a response, instead continuing to argue with his brother. Briarkit, however, agreed with Civetkit, and she curled up, blocking out the sound of the bickering tomcats.

º º º

The battle patrols had just left. Not knowing about the solemnity of the day, Briarkit and Civetkit had been having a mock battle as Clan leaders (“our future selves”). Civetkit had declared herself MarshClan leader immediately; not wanting to pretend to identify with BlazeClan (and forgetting OakClan and SageClan), Briarkit had hastened to say she led her own Clan, which she called FierceClan. (Civetkit was Raccoonkit in the FH game)

Foxwhisker and Rustytail, left to guard the camp, did not try to stop their fun. Eventually Civetkit bored of the game and the kits returned to the nursery. Shadowspots was not in the den; with so many warriors on a battle mission she had decided to hunt for herself.

“You’re really stupid, you know?” Juniperkit was meowing. “You’ve got less brains than a bumblebee.”

“I’ve got more brains than you,” Thunderkit snorted, “and twice the guts, too. Don’t be so chicken.”

Juniperkit grunted and tried to look important. “Well, I suppose I’m left to go help guard the camp. I can do the real jobs around here on my own.” He padded out of the den with his nose and tail held high.

“Good. He’s gone.” Thunderkit rose to his paws. “I’m gonna go fight now.” (and here we go)

“You can’t fight,” Briarkit mewed.

“I can, too.” Thunderkit stretched. “Anyone coming?”

“Stay here,” Wolfkit meowed. “We can have practice battles and you’ll know more.”

“I don’t want any more practice fights,” Civetkit whined. “Let’s not do anything.”

Spiderkit just watched wide-eyed.

“I don’t need you guys anyway,” Thunderkit sniffed. He shoved his head out under the edge of the den and wriggled through, scraping at the rocky ground.

Civetkit shifted anxiously. “I don’t think this is safe. Shadowspots needs to stop him.”

“I’ll go with him,” Briarkit mewed, and crawled through the space Thunderkit had opened up. (well he'll be safe now) The ground was slippery; she followed his tracks over the rocks and mud. His pawprints joined with a slightly older set—one of the battle patrols.

BlazeClan and MarshClan shared the marshes, but the battle patrol appeared to have gone into the trees, as their scent and prints disappeared. Thunderkit seemed to know what he was doing; presumably his strong nose had picked up a scent Briarkit couldn’t.

Briarkit heard the battle before she managed to catch up with the tomkit. He hadn’t slowed his pace until the sounds had reached him. She trotted up to him, panting.

“What are you doing?” she hissed once she’d caught her breath. “Juniperkit was right; you’re not just mouse-brained; this is the worst idea you’ve ever had.”

“Then why are you here?”

“I want to bring you back.”

He shook his head. Opening his mouth to speak, he took a step forward…then froze.

A small dark gray tabby and white tomcat had emerged from the battle. He had a large muzzle and long, feathery fur. “I knew I heard something,” he meowed, sounding pleased with himself. “How do you like this place? I think you’ll fit in well.” Briarkit had already scrambled backward away from him, but he swung out his paw and managed to catch the side of Thunderkit’s head.

“I’ll kill you,” Thunderkit snarled. (sure you will)

“Try it.” He shook out his bloodstained fur, smirking. His expression turned to surprise as Thunderkit launched himself into the air, hooking his claws into the older cat’s pelt. The cat shifted his balance and threw himself onto the ground, squashing the kit.

“Thunderkit,” Briarkit whimpered. She made no move to rescue him—she didn’t know what to do. This cat was clearly more skilled than Civetkit. (in FH I literally sat there waiting to be kidnapped and no one noticed me)

“You want some too?” The tomcat bared his teeth, then hissed in pain as Thunderkit latched onto his ear and tore off the tip. “That’s it!” He rolled back onto his paws and tossed Thunderkit away.

Briarkit still did nothing as the cat pounced on her friend, pummeling him with his paws. Thunderkit was thrashing around on the ground, kicking his attacker with all his strength; he managed to squeeze out from the BlazeClan cat’s grip and lash at his face.

The enemy drew back a paw to attack. Thunderpaw latched his teeth into the soft pad. The cat shrieked and started waving his paw around, hopping in the mud. Thunderkit held his grip. Something in the attacker’s paw snapped audibly, accompanied by an even louder shout. (Tigerkit vs. FH Blackpaw was way more of a curb stomp battle! Tigerkit destroyed that apprentice)

“Blackpaw?” A dark brown tabby she-cat joined the tom. Her eyes lit up when she saw Thunderkit; Briarkit retreated even farther to hide behind a stone. “Don’t kill it. Bring it to the Den.”

Thunderkit leapt at the she-cat, jaws wide, and sank his teeth into her leg. She reacted instantaneously, rearing up and whirling around so that he slammed into a tree. He let go and fell onto the ground. (Tigerkit successfully defended himself against the warrior that came to help Blackpaw…I think he also got flung but he was totally fine)

“My paw,” Blackpaw gasped, shuddering as he tried to set it on the ground.

“Jackalcloud is fighting right now. You’ll have to wait until after the battle.”

“Batclaw—”

“I don’t know the first thing about herbs, and neither does anyone else. Jackalcloud can’t just back off from the battle; he’s guarding the Den.” She shook her head. “Get rid of the kit and wait. I’m going back and fighting.” (yeah, Blackpaw, suffer)

Blackpaw nodded with a growl.

Thunderkit had risen to his paws again, blinking and shaking his head to clear it. Blackpaw hobbled closer, hesitated, and crouched back, holding his injured paw to his body. “You win this time,” he spat. “I’m coming for you. Don’t think I’m not, either, because one day I’ll find you and then you’re dead.”

Thunderkit bared his teeth triumphantly. “Told her I could do it.”

“Get out of here before the warriors come back,” Briarkit whispered from behind the rock.

“The other one’s still here?” Blackpaw meowed. His eyes were still narrowed in pain, but his ears perked up. He watched Briarkit intently as she crept forward from her hiding place.

“Come on,” she begged, but Thunderkit shook his head.

“I can fight, see? I’m going to the battle.”

“Please don’t.” She wrapped her tail around her hind legs. “I don’t want to stay here.”

Thunderkit bounded closer to the camp barrier. “They’re still fighting. I’m going in.”

There was a gray cat with an unfamiliar scent blocking the entrance; Briarkit didn’t recognize it—she had never smelled OakClan before. “You’d better get out of here,” he warned. He was thickset and long-furred. His green eyes were long and pointed at the ends. “They’re keeping kits as prisoners in that den over there.”

The Den would have been unassuming had it not been for the thorny tendrils woven amongst the walls or the five warriors stationed in front of it. (the Den!!!!! I'm not sure how ShatteredClan kept their prisoners because there wasn't really anywhere in camp to keep them…I know FH has those rock domes but ShatteredClan's camp was out in the open)

“You should get out of here,” he meowed, lowering his muzzle.

“I don’t know the way,” Briarkit mewed.

“I’ll take you back to camp.”

“No, I’m fighting,” Thunderkit insisted. “Move it and let me into the camp.”

The gray warrior lifted him by the scruff of his neck, ignoring his shouts and protests, and led Briarkit away from the camp, taking the kits all the way to the main entrance of MarshClan’s camp. As Rustytail and Foxwhisker charged out, he dropped Thunderkit and meowed, “This one thinks he’s a fighter.”

“Thank you, Grayfeather,” meowed Foxwhisker. The gray warrior dipped his head, turned around, and raced back the way he had come.

º º º

BlazeClan had withheld (withstood) the attack, but most of MarshClan’s warriors made it home. Only one, Swiftnose, had been lost. “Managed to take that Jackal cat down with her,” Rosetalon had commented. “We’re one step closer to breaking through to the Den.” OakClan’s single patrol had not lost any cats. Jackalcloud and Reedfox were presumed to be the only BlazeClan fatalities. (yeah, Blackpaw, suffer)

“You know that means the stupid apprentice can’t get his paw fixed,” Thunderkit meowed. “I broke it myself—Briarkit saw, didn’t you? I can fight. I proved it. I broke an apprentice’s paw.”

“Yes, but that warrior almost broke you,” she pointed out. (I wanted to say this to "Tigerkit" but my friend never gave me an opening)

“I just know Willowstar’s going to delay my ceremony.” Thunderkit sighed and flopped down. “If that stupid warrior hadn’t brought us back home I might have made it to Waspstar.”

“If you’d made it to Waspstar he’d have killed you faster than Batclaw hurled you into that tree.”

Juniperkit nodded. “Don’t get ahead of yourself.”

“What do you know?” Thunderkit scoffed. “You weren’t there. You don’t know.”

º º º

A few nights later there was a storm. It was the worst storm any cat remembered—and this was true even before the river overflowed.

The camp was flooded. Willowstar called for the cats to flee; she and a couple of warriors planned to stay on top of the Stone Perch until the water receded a bit, or at least stopped rising so they could swim away safely.

The water rushed around trees and through the camp with a force stronger than Briarkit would have imagined. It was shallow enough that she could have stood in it, but it swept her off her paws. She flailed but was carried away nonetheless.

By the time she regained her footing she had no idea where she was.

Briarkit was lost. (and here's my in-universe equivalent to being kicked out of the Clan! I guess maybe it disbanded or something but they roleplayed on group mode and I was suddenly not in a group…)

part 2 (see the chapter heading pictures told you how much time had passed and what season it was)

Last night’s new moon had not added anything to Thunderfang’s mood. He and Juniperflight had not spoken—they weren’t allowed to—but each knew the other’s main complaint: the cold. There had been little wind and no snow or ice, but the lack of shelter atop the hill made sitting still unbearable.

Now, however, the sun was up. Thunderfang stretched luxuriously, though twinges of guilt still prickled at his pelt: Briarkit should have been there too. No, not kit. He’d have to think of her as a warrior now—Briarpelt? That worked.

“You two can rest now, you know,” Rosetalon mewed. (look, another Rosetalon) She was preparing to leave with the dawn patrol. Even after the few weeks since she’d received it, the scar over the left side of her face still took Thunderfang aback—her eye was intact, but clawmarks laced the surface. Frostnose had been uncertain at first whether she could save the eye. As it was, the tortoiseshell warrior’s vision was greatly limited by the scratch.

“Yeah. Got to save up our strength.” Thunderfang shook out his fur.

“We’ll probably hunt later,” Juniperflight offered, but Rosetalon was already leaving with her patrol. “Ah, oh well. We can tell someone else when we get up.”

MarshClan no longer lived in the marsh. Willowstar had deemed it too dangerous in case the banks broke again; they had made a new camp on the far side of SageClan’s territory. Everyone except Briarkit and Ricefoot, an elder, had been found. The other Clans were all far enough from the river that their camps were unaffected.

Waspstar was still alive, and the Den still held. BlazeClan had been sheltering rogues to increase their numbers in battle.

Thunderfang crept gratefully into an empty nest in the warriors’ den. The newest part of the hill camp, it was still a bit drafty, but the mossy nests were quite a bit warmer than the outside air.

He dreamed of mice.

º º º

“Wish I were a warrior,” Wolfpaw meowed. His voice was surprisingly soft for a cat with such a heavy tread.

“The only benefit is no mouse bile,” Thunderfang assured him with a twitch of his whiskers, “and even that could be a maybe.”

“We’re almost there, anyway.” Civetpaw’s blue eyes narrowed in determination. “We just have to last, like, another moon.”

“Are you coming or not?” Juniperflight complained. He had been hovering by the camp entrance in an attempt to get Thunderfang to follow him for the past five minutes or so. “Because if you don’t move your paws now I’m leaving you behind.”

“Calm down. Of course I’m coming.” Thunderfang dipped his head to the apprentices. “Well, that old grumpy badger can’t wait another heartbeat. Guess it’s time to go.”

“I’d go, but I have training,” Wolfpaw meowed after him as Thunderfang dashed away. (fun fact: I forgot at the last minute that I was planning to name him Thundernose and then I got into Pokémon and now I keep thinking of the move Thunder Fang)

Juniperflight waved his tail. “Let’s go near the Thunderpath.”

“Yeah. All these hills are getting tiring.” Thunderfang followed his brother to the flatter part of MarshClan’s new territory. The Thunderpath wasn’t officially part of their land, but since there were no other Clans that way it wasn’t an issue.

There was a grove of mainly maple and beech trees. Twolegs had for the most part left it alone. Juniperflight and Thunderfang sniffed through the forest until they found a hickory tree, its bark peeling off in thick grayish strips.

“Think there’ll be any bats here?” Juniperflight asked. (I like the bat part…I chose StoneClan as my Clan from my friend (good friend)'s set of four Clans partly because their description included eating bats and I thought it was cool that the cats could catch them)

“Ours left, but there might be more.” Thunderfang put his nose to the hickory bark and tried to scent for the bats. Looking straight up he couldn’t spot any of the dark, fuzzy spots that announced sheltered prey. “I don’t see any here.”

“I hope there’s something here,” Juniperflight muttered. “Can’t eat until we feed the Clan, but we can’t feed the Clan if there’s nothing to eat, now, can we?”

Thunderfang nodded, not really paying attention. “We could try the creek.”

“It’s all frozen over by now. It’s got to be.”

The toms padded back out of the copse and to the creek. ("copse" is a legitimate word but I should definitely have been using "grove") Juniperflight had been right—it was frozen—but Thunderfang sniffed hopefully for voles anyway.

“Let’s just look for mice,” he meowed eventually, resigned. Scouring the meadows they ended up with a successful catch, reasonable enough for a pair of warriors, and returned to camp.

Wolfpaw, Spiderpaw, and Civetpaw were out training; Twitchpaw and Eyriepaw were on apprentice duties while their surviving brother, Kitepaw, watched from the mouth of the medicine den. (Two of their brothers had been stillborn and a third, Breezekit, had not made it through leaf-fall.) Thunderfang and Juniperflight split up, the former joining Whitewillow and Grasswhisker in a cluster of rocks.

“I swear we’ve got to get better territory,” Whitewillow complained. “Starlings are great and all, but they sure don’t stick around. It’s too bad we can’t eat geese.”

“That would be so much easier,” agreed Grasswhisker.

“But with their stupid beaks!” lamented Whitewillow. “We’ll have to make do like always.”

“Just think. Now without us in the marsh BlazeClan’s bound to be hunting there all the time.” Thunderfang groaned before continuing. “Dumb flood. Dumb river.” It was at that moment he realized he hated the river itself. It was stupid—holding a grudge against water? But he did, and that was that. (no no no not the arc words get rid of them)

“Willowstar wanted to start planning for an attack today. She says if we get them in, say, three days, we’ll have enough time to get the other Clans involved at least a little and they’ll be so outnumbered they won’t have a chance. Even if half the prisoners are dead by now, we’ve got to break open the Den.” (they still haven't gotten those cats out of there)

“She’s finally seeing sense, huh?”

Grasswhisker grinned. “Come on, Thunderfang, not everything’s about fighting.”

“But this is.” (oh Thunderfang you never change)

“I suppose.” Whitewillow was unusually small, with long fur along her spine that made it look like her hackles were permanently raised. Her yellow eyes glittered coldly, but she wasn’t as unfriendly as she looked. (this is the exact same Whitewillow from RockClan Calls being reused as a character)

Ashstep, Twitchpaw’s mentor, stormed past, looking murderous. The three cats peered after him curiously, but rocks obscured their view. He started yelling at someone—presumably his own apprentice—about breaking dens.

“Speaking of breaking dens, I hate how they put those thorns in.” Whitewillow shuddered. “I tried to tear out the back wall of the Den once and I nearly ripped my paws in half. Still, I haven’t got it nearly as bad as that one cat. Blackstorm, I think his name is? The one whose paw you broke?”

“Poppybreeze did her best, but no one’s as good as me,” Thunderfang boasted. A young warrior named Poppybreeze had taken the position of BlazeClan medicine cat after Jackalcloud’s death. (yeah, Blackstorm, suffer)

“There you are, Thunderfang,” Shadowspots mewed, blinking in greeting to the other two warriors. “Sorry I wasn’t here this morning. Willowstar thought we should try hunting a bit before dawn, to see if maybe there was some prey that came out then.”

“It’s okay,” he meowed, “and did you look for bats? I think they’re all gone.”

“They leave every leafbare,” his mother sighed.

“I wonder if eggs are good to eat,” Whitewillow announced, looking awkward when they stared at her. “I mean, they come from birds and aren’t…you know…”

“Whether they’re food or not, there aren’t any now.” Shadowspots shook her head. “Leafbare’s always hard, though. Can’t imagine how Pebbletail and I made it through last leafbare with kits.”

“We’ll pull through.” Whitewillow yawned. “We’ve got some space, at least.”

“It’s the cold that worries me,” Shadowspots mewed. “Anyway, I’d better go see Willowstar. She wanted to talk to me about our battle plans.”

º º º

“It’s time to take the battle to their camp once again,” Willowstar mewed calmly. Her eyes narrowed. “I have sent Rosetalon, Rustytail, and Eaglefoot out to bring a patrol from OakClan to help us. Tomorrow we will ask SageClan as well.”

“They know all that,” Barkfang rasped. “Okay, guys, so we’ve been discussing strategy. What we decided was that we’re not there to defeat them anymore. We just have to get the prisoners out of the Den.”

“What if they’ve moved the actual prisoners?” Frostnose asked. “We’ve never seen inside the Den; it could be a trap.”

“We could just dig in,” Ashstep suggested.

“We’ve tried that before. We failed.” Willowstar hesitated before continuing. “If you scent that a cat isn’t from BlazeClan…they probably aren’t. The rogues are not protected by the code, and they are our enemies.”

“So we kill them,” Barkfang meowed.

Thunderfang hadn’t needed this clarification. “The code doesn’t say ‘rogues.’ It says anyone outside the code. BlazeClan isn’t following it. Why can’t we—”

“We have killed some of their warriors,” Willowstar reminded him, “but we must be careful. Some of them are doubtlessly only following orders; the rogues live there by choice. You may kill them if you must.”

“Right,” muttered Thunderfang.

“Two waves. Head straight for the Den. We’re going to get inside. Once we have trained fighters in there we can fight our way right back out—and we’ll be on both sides of them.”

“And numbers for protection,” Barkfang meowed.

“In case they’ve anticipated us, and send cats out to meet us, we’re going to have our strong, fast cats on the edges of the battle party. They will be ordered to run forward and we can surround them.”

“Double envelopment.” Barkfang swished his tail. “Our center falls back and we’ve circled them. Then anyone available keeps going to the Den.”

“We’ve been discussing other tactics, but we have no way of knowing which to use until we’re there.” (this feels…late)

Eaglefoot, Rosetalon, and Rustytail came bounding into the camp. “Willowstar! We have news!”

Four OakClan cats—Thunderfang recognized only Grayfeather—had come with them. A gray tabby brushed forward and addressed Willowstar. “You sent for us anticipating that we would join you in attacking BlazeClan?”

“Yes,” she mewed warily. “What has happened?”

“So you haven’t heard,” the tabby breathed. “BlazeClan is in tatters.”

“What?”

“The Den has broken—OakClan has taken in all of the prisoners; we’re making sure they’re okay before making them travel any more. Their camp barrier is being torn down piece by piece. Their territory is being raided. Their rogues got tired of helping and overthrew them. Waspstar is on his final life. BlazeClan is no longer a threat.”

“The rogues, on the other hand,” a white tom meowed mournfully, “may very well be.” (aka Rogue Heaven)

º º º

There was no yowl or call to attack. One moment the camp was quiet—tense, with the previous day’s news, but quiet nonetheless. The next it had been overrun. The rogues swarmed them. Willowstar was quick to call a surrender.

The rogue leader—Thunderfang was too far away to tell if it was a tom or a she-cat, but its fur was dark—ordered the cats to take all the prey and break the flimsy barriers.

“We are not finished,” the cat assured MarshClan with a growl.

“No,” Juniperflight hissed as Thunderfang prepared to pounce on a nearby rogue. “We can’t beat them.”

One cat had taken notice.

She was quite familiar. (okay but she noticed him so he wouldn't think she was familiar because he didn't notice her)

part 3: BRIAR

“Oh, yes.” Tourmaline took a bite of mouse. “Two down, two to go. We’re eating like this all leafbare.” (two Clans)

“I recognized those cats,” Briar mewed. “Most of them, anyway. Thunderkit and Juniperkit, and my friends Civetkit and—”

“Are they your friends?” inquired the silver tabby, black-rimmed ears pricking up. Scraps of fur and mouse blood clung to her white muzzle.

“Well, not anymore,” Briar amended. “But I still recognized them. They’re probably warriors by now, you know.”

“Bet you’re glad you came with us.”

“I didn’t know they were still in the area,” mused Briar, ignoring her friend’s last comment. “After the flood I never found scent or sign of them anywhere. At least now I know they’re still alive.”

“You sure you’re not missing them?” Tourmaline’s eyes narrowed. “If you’re going all soft for the old days I don’t know how much longer Badger’ll let you stay.”

“He’s creepy anyway,” Briar scoffed. “Always in that stupid skull mask.” Badger had made his own name after finding most of a badger skull and managing to fit it over his head. It was somewhat ill-fitting but he claimed it protected him.

“Don’t let him catch you saying that.” Tourmaline finished her mouse and started cleaning her whiskers.

“I don’t plan on it.” She shuddered. “Why does he have to wear it? We can all smell him; it’s not like it’s a real disguise.”

“Like you said. Creepy. You know, ‘strike fear in your enemies’ hearts’ and all that.”

“I guess so.” Briar curled her lip. “Can’t imagine it’s worth it, though. It must feel awful.”

“And smell pretty bad,” Tourmaline agreed. “Come on, let’s not let him hear us, okay? I like my fur. And ears. And whiskers.”

“Badger’s not going to take our whiskers.”

“You never know.”

“Rising Tide, on the other paw…”

Tourmaline lifted a paw to her face and curled it over her muzzle, flattening her whiskers behind it. “I’m not risking that, thanks.”

“Maybe I’ll take your whiskers!” Ripple had returned from hunting; he was shivering in the cold. “What for?”

“Nothing,” the she-cats said in unison. Briar was quick to add, “We’re just joking, honestly.”

Ripple purred. “I know you better than that, Bri.”

“Don’t call me that.”

“All right, all right, I’ll stop.” He sat down in the moss and curled his tail around his forepaws, hunching over for warmth. “So what else is up?”

“Quill sent us to guard the camp earlier. Rowan’s there now.”

“Any news from Badger?” Tourmaline asked.

“He wants to wait a while before the next attack. We’ve got lots of prey now, but he says we should wait and see how bad this leafbare is going to be before wasting anything.”

“That was Briar’s old family,” Tourmaline commented.

“The hill cats? Their leader was sure quick to surrender.” Ripple snickered. “That Clan was kind of pathetic. No offense, Bri…ar.”

“None taken,” she growled. “That’s not my home anymore. I waited there more than a moon and no one came looking for me.” She shuffled her paws. “Ricefoot maybe, but I think he was dead before anyone even realized I was gone.” (poor Ricefoot)

“Do you think any of them recognized you?” Tourmaline was sitting straighter now.

“I don’t see why it should matter; they didn’t care about me before, so why should they bother now?”

“Just don’t get cold feet if we fight them again,” Ripple warned. “Badger’ll tolerate a little what-if, but there’s no way you’re staying if you try to turn back.”

“I know,” she snapped. “Stop talking about MarshClan. I just told you, it’s not my home anymore. I’m not going back. Ever. I was less than six moons old when they left me, and I don’t want to talk to anyone there.” She sighed. “It might be nice to talk to Thunderkit a little, but he’d never talk to a rogue besides to tell them he was going to kill them.” (okay I had no idea where I was going with this story at this point)

Ripple looked satisfied. “Good.”

Tourmaline just looked yet more interested. “Ooh, who’s Thunderkit? Is he—ooh, do you like him?”

Briar cut her a glare. “Tourmaline! He was my brother! Kind of.”

“Oh, all right. But did you ever—”

“She was just a kit,” Ripple meowed, dark green eyes glimmering. “Not everyone has a love life from the day they learn to walk, you know.”

“Whatever.”

“You guys are all exiled,” someone growled. Pomegranate coughed and slunk out from underneath a bush. Mud clung to her claws. “How’d I do that time?”

“You didn’t sound like Badger,” Ripple grunted.

“But you knew who I was trying to sound like.”

“Well, yeah, you were growling like him, I guess. But you’ve got to get a better edge on your voice.”

“I don’t want to ruin it,” she pointed out. “You’ve heard Badger before.” She fixed her gaze on Briar. “You. Come with me. –Only her,” she added as Ripple and Tourmaline moved to follow.

This was slightly worrisome; Pomegranate, despite being fairly young, had gained a high rank in the rogue group due to her startlingly accurate voice mimicry and nearly photographic memory. She rarely took lower-ranked cats places one-on-one except for official business.

“You might not have heard,” she mewed in an almost perfect imitation of Ripple’s self-important meow, “but Pinecone is having kits soon.” She switched back to her own voice and explained, “Badger needs someone to take Pinecone’s role for now. This is unusual, but as you’re the only cat from the area he would like to consult you for help. For one thing, we’re going to need a camp, and then there’s the matter of actually good hunting grounds.”

“That’s easy. We can all just go live in the marsh where you found me.”

“Is it safe?” Pomegranate narrowed her eyes. “Didn’t you say everyone else evacuated and one cat died?”

“I think he got stuck and something hit him. It’s okay; it only flooded once. And now it’s leafbare, so we won’t have to worry until newleaf.” Briar cocked her head. “At least check it out.”

“That we will most certainly.” Pomegranate licked her lips. “Badger wanted to know what might happen at a Gathering.”

“Well, I’ve never been to one, but I know there’s a truce.”

“That’s what Quill said, yes. Anything else?”

“I don’t think the truce technically includes us, because we’re not a Clan, but if we say we just want to participate and not hurt anyone—”

“What would the point of attacking then be, anyway?” snorted Pomegranate. “If you’re sitting around like that you’ve got no prey or herbs or anything.”

“I guess because it’s unexpected?”

Pomegranate ignored her. “Nothing at all. Which brings me to my next point: Badger’s plan. We’re going to need some herbs to get through leafbare safely if we keep fighting. But no one Badger’s sent for seems to know a thing about healing. One or two could list off a few herbs. Comfrey, poppy, juniper.”

“Juniperkit ate juniper once,” Briar couldn’t help mentioning. “Frostnose made him throw it up.”

“We’re raiding the Clans’ herbs.”

“What?” Briar blinked. “You can’t do that.”

“Why not?”

“It’s—it’s against the—”

“The warrior code?” Pomegranate twitched her whiskers. “We don’t have that here.”

“It’s not technically against the code, actually,” Briar mewed, “but we…I mean, that’s not something anyone does.”

“How many cats are left at camp during the Gathering?” Pomegranate asked.

“We can’t just go raid all their herbs. What about the queens with kits? We can’t let kits die; that is against the code, and even if you don’t care about that—”

“How many cats does MarshClan leave?” Pomegranate pressed.

“I—usually about four or five warriors, all the queens and kits, maybe an apprentice or two…most of the elders…”

“Better than expected,” the ginger tabby whispered. “It never ceases to amaze me how stupid Clan cats can be and yet survive so well.”

“Please don’t raid MarshClan. I’ll collect herbs myself.”

“In the middle of leafbare?” Pomegranate shook her head. “Are you sure you belong here, or do you want to go back?”

“To them?” Briar snarled. “Never! This is where I belong.”

“Start acting like it.” Pomegranate flicked back her right ear—the rogues’ equivalent of Clan cats’ head-dipping—and crawled away under the bare bushes. (hey I did something like that with the Tribe in AtA! didn't realize I'd done it here too)

º º º

Briar had not expected to see her Clanmates again. She had fought her way back through the waterlogged marshes to the Stone Perch and supported herself there for a moon. No one ever came back to find her. The only remnants of her old Clan were the tall rock and the muddy body of Ricefoot at the base of a tree.

She had also not expected this to sting so much. Briar had thought she had suppressed any lingering desire to find MarshClan again, but the sight of Thunderkit and Juniperkit had shocked her. They had been looking at her. They must not have changed much. What were their warrior names?

And did they remember her? They had to. But there was no way they had recognized her. I’ve changed enough for that, right?

She was bothered to have been able to recognize them.

Tourmaline’s questioning had hurt, too. Briar supposed the life the tabby had left behind wasn’t nearly as exciting as her own: the one of a sheltered kittypet. Tourmaline had always attributed her shiny pelt to this, saying it was the bright side to her bloodline. So maybe she just didn’t understand.

Briar had made her decisions. She was a rogue; she had turned her back on Clan life forever. That was that. (I'm in pain)

No turning back. (I think I forgot about the implication that Briar would have been one of the cats involved in hanging out with BlazeClan and also defeating them?)

º º º

The full moon hung bright in the sky. It was cloudless—hopefully this was a good sign. Badger had taken some of the rogues to find Mistrocks, the stony ground where the Clans met.

Briar had not been chosen to go to the Gathering with Badger’s group. Quill had assigned her to accompany Turtle’s mission to raid an herb stock.

She had at first been wary that it was a test, but Quill had seemed confused at her doubts; he simply wanted all the cats with any herb experience to help choose which to steal. Turtle herself had no experience; she was leading the patrol to fight.

Hopefully Thunderkit would not be there.

part 4: THUNDER

The moon blazed silver over the forest. Mistrocks shone brightly; it was almost surreal.

“I’m telling you,” Thunderfang insisted, “it was her. I swear by StarClan. I’d know her muzzle anywhere.”

“She’s been gone too long. There’s no way.” Civetpaw shook her head. “Your nose is good, but I think your brain is going.”

“Did he ever have one?” meowed Juniperflight. “But honestly, I thought it was her too.”

“She liked MarshClan too much. I suppose next you’re going to say she killed Ricefoot?”

“What in StarClan’s name are you talking about?” a flecked ginger she-cat mewed.

“Those foxhearted, badger-brained rogues.” Thunderfang lashed his tail. “They’re cowards, savages, and liars. But I know I recognized one of them, and she doesn’t belong there. She belongs with us.”

“What, she your girlfriend or something?” (how do you know what a girlfriend is) The tabby laughed. Now Thunderfang could smell her distinct BlazeClan scent. He unsheathed his claws reflexively. She eyed his strong paws and shifted uneasily, looking away. “Yeah, those rogues are…pretty badger-hearted.”

“Brightstep!” someone mewed. The ginger she-cat turned to talk to the speaker, a black-and-white tom.

“Brightstep?” whispered Thunderfang, twitching his whiskers.

“They’re not all going to be named Evilclaws, you know,” Juniperflight meowed. “They’ve got normal names too.”

“Just seems out of place with, you know, Blackstorm, Batclaw…”

“Yours is the fighting name,” Civetpaw pointed out. “Besides, I know BlazeClan cats called Minnowpaw and Quailpaw.”

“Minnowflash and Quailclaw, actually.” A silver tabby she-cat with a white blaze on her muzzle shouldered through the crowd. “Knew I’d find you here.”

“BlazeClan is hunting well,” Waspstar meowed hoarsely from the Star Ledge, a tall, pale stone where the leaders sat to address the Clans. “We have had trouble with rogues, as I am sure you all know, but we are recovering. We have three new warriors. Their names are Quailclaw, Swifttooth, and Minnowflash.”

“Quailclaw! Swifttooth! (missing the end quotation mark again)

“MarshClan has had rogue trouble as well.” Willowstar was hunched over, tail wrapped tightly to her body against the leafbare wind. “Other than that, we’re fine as well. We have two new warriors, Thunderfang and Juniperflight, and three new apprentices, Eyriepaw, Twitchpaw, and Kitepaw. Kitepaw is training as medicine cat under Frostnose.” She kept shivering as the gathered cats chanted their names.

“We haven’t had too much of a problem with the rogues.” Quickstar was the SageClan leader. “Prey is running well. We have—”

“I would like to join your Gathering.” Thunderfang had difficulty seeing from the back. It was a dark cat; from this distance that was all he could see. The rogue leader. His fur bristling, he opened his mouth to protest, but the cat spoke again. He—Thunderfang thought he might be a tom—had a somewhat commanding, fairly intimidating growl. “There is a truce on the full moon, I have been informed. You do conform to it?”

“I suppose,” Quickstar meowed, narrowing his mismatched eyes at the cat.

The dark cat climbed up the Star Ledge. At first Thunderfang had assumed he had a white head, but it appeared to be a sort of cover.

“Is that a skull?” Civetpaw muttered. “Did he kill someone and take their bones?”

“That’s way too big to be a cat skull. Those would fit inside his head.”

There were rogues streaming into Mistrocks now. A small dark ginger tabby sat behind Thunderfang.

Everyone had begun whispering. There were wispy clouds starting to float across the sky, but they didn’t quite reach the moon.

“We are planning to make our home near you,” the cat announced. His deep snarl wavered a bit, and Thunderfang guessed it wasn’t his natural voice. “My name is Badger. As I am a leader I plan to receive nine lives and make my name Badgerstar; I have been told this is your tradition.” The skull obscured his eyes too much for Thunderfang to judge his expression.

“Where exactly are you going to live?” Willowstar mewed warily.

“The marshes for now. One of our newer members has shown me an excellent place to make camp. When warmer weather comes we will see about moving on.”

“Listen to him,” Thunderfang hissed. “He’s got to be talking about her.”

“He could be,” mused Civetpaw.

Badger coughed, sheathing and unsheathing his claws repeatedly. Fluffing out his neck fur, he continued in a slightly quieter, more strained voice, “We are well protected against attack.”

“He could be,” the little ginger tabby was mewing to herself. “He could be. He could be.” She was changing her voice, adjusting it to sound more like Civetpaw. “He could be.”

“Shut up,” Civetpaw growled.

“He could…close enough.” The tabby closed her mouth and focused on the Star Ledge again.

“As I was saying, we have four new apprentices, Nightpaw, Stormpaw, Cloudpaw, and Smokepaw,” Quickstar meowed. The rogues looked confused at first as the Clan cats chanted the apprentices’ names.

Ravenstar stood up; he was the youngest leader, but his thick fur made him look the largest. “OakClan has taken in the prisoners and plans to take them back to their birth Clans soon. We have five new warriors: Windstep, Frostfang, Patchfrost, Rosefoot, and Snowpetal.”

This time the rogues joined the cheering enthusiastically.

“I want to be a warrior,” Civetpaw mumbled—at least, that’s what Thunderfang thought she was saying.

“The only real difference is the den.”

“Yeah, and you guys don’t get dragged up at dawn every morning for training.”

“Apprentices don’t train at dawn every day, and we still have dawn patrol sometimes. Just think, it could be worse—you could be a mentor.”

“But mentors can be leader!” Civetpaw protested. Several cats glared at her.

“Is everyone finished speaking, then?” Willowstar mewed, sounding slightly surprised. The other leaders looked at one another; Ravenstar nodded. The rogues’ arrival had shaken everyone.

“The Gathering is over,” Waspstar announced, shoving Badger aside roughly before hopping down. This might have been the only thing he ever did that Thunderfang approved of. “Everyone go home.”

Some of the rogues exchanged nervous glances. “Willowstar,” Badger snarled, “can I talk to you?”

“W—wh—what ab—bout?” she chattered; her jaws were shaking now. She looked unsteady on her round paws.

“The marshes. I do believe you once lived there—until the flood. How often does the river rise above its banks?”

“N—never that high b—before or sss—since, but it’s not un—unusual for it to get a bit higher than normal. Can I g—go now?”

Badger twitched; he seemed to have made a motion to go forward but forced himself to stay still. “I…very well.”

“You think he likes her?” Civetpaw whispered.

“Nah. He might, I guess.” Thunderfang looked at Juniperflight. “What do you say?”

“I think I hope StarClan doesn’t take rogues seriously.” His brother’s copper eyes were narrow in thought. “If that cat gets nine lives he’ll kill us all.”

“We do have ears, you know,” the short-legged ginger tabby mewed indignantly in a nearly accurate impression of Civetpaw.

Juniperflight dipped his head; the tabby looked confused and slowly ducked, not lowering her gaze.

“It’s a traditional sign,” Civetpaw mewed, smirking.

“Briar never mentioned that,” the tabby muttered; she stood up and followed the other rogues away from Mistrocks.

The three cats sat in stunned silence for a moment, ignoring Willowstar leading their Clanmates out of the clearing.

“I told you so.”

º º º

“Willowstar! Thank StarClan!” Rustytail—who had, as he often was, been left to guard the camp—was dashing toward the returning Gathering patrol. “The rogues are back. A calico this time, not the skull-face, but they’re—”

“That’s why he wanted to talk to me,” Willowstar breathed. “He was stalling. Of course—hh—how could I have been so—” She broke out and raced past Rustytail, who turned, panting, and followed. The rest of the patrol hurried to catch up.

“Those cowards,” Thunderfang panted. “Attacking while we were gone. Sending those distractions to buy time. And learn about us, too, I bet.”

The calico tabby was standing in the mouth of the medicine den. Her yellowish eyes were wide, but she didn’t look frightened; she was staring intensely at the few MarshClan cats in the clearing, who were in a standoff with other rogues.

“Get out of here,” Willowstar roared. Fury had chased away her coldness. “This is not your place!”

The caliby bristled, appearing to swell in size. “You abandoned your marsh. Why should we believe you will keep this one?”

“Attack!” ordered Willowstar, but as the returning patrol rushed the rogues in the camp, six more flooded out of the medicine den.

They were carrying herbs. (really!?)

Thunderfang launched himself at one of them. It was a dark brown and white tom; he was carrying a wide, furled leaf. A couple of poppy seeds spilled out of it as he swerved and darted away.

“Follow Ripple!” the caliby cried, leaping up on top of the bare bush over the medicine den and thrashing through. Apparently Ripple was the one carrying the poppy seeds. Thunderfang charged after him, but a sandy she-cat slashed at his ear as she hared past him, her mouth apparently full of juniper berries.

“Come back here,” he snarled, stumbling. He blinked. “Briar!”

Two more rogues scrambled out of the medicine den, pursued by Foxwhisker and Eaglefoot. Thunderfang hesitated, then ran after Briar. “Briar! Briarkit! What are you doing? Get back here and tell me what in StarClan’s name you’re doing!”

She glanced over her shoulder fearfully; he was still faster than her. She didn’t say anything; her mouth was too full of berries.

One of the two last medicine den rogues pounced on Thunderfang, knocking him down, and took off. He was a ragged silver tabby; his mouth was bulging with catmint. The other, a smaller, shinier tabby, carried watermint.

“Get back here, Briar,” he snarled from the ground.

“That was her, wasn’t it?” Juniperflight puffed. He had fresh scratches over his muzzle and was out of breath from running. “StarClan, am I tired.”

“Briarkit, get back here!” Thunderfang howled. “Oh, it’s not worth it. Let’s see how much they took.”

Frostnose had an ugly scratch across her side. Shadowspots was pestering her about it—“It looks bad, really dangerous!”—but the medicine cat insisted it was nothing.

“Honestly, I’m trained in this sort of thing,” she kept saying. “It looks horrible, but it’s very shallow. See how little it’s bleeding? It’s just a big scrape. It needs attention, but it won’t kill me.”

“Which one got you?” Rustytail meowed. His left ear was badly torn, and blood was dripping across the side of his face.

“The big tabby. Black and silver.”

“He knocked me down,” Thunderfang grunted. “Guess I was in his way.”

“They’ve taken pretty much all the juniper, catmint, and marigold,” Kitepaw announced from the mouth of the medicine den, looking terrified. He had clawmarks on his nose and shoulder, but they didn’t look deep at all. “Most of the poppy seeds, but they spilled some of them in the camp. Some of the rest is missing, too, but we’re not out of anything except those three.” He glanced around nervously. “So who’s really hurt? They left most of the burdock and a little of the comfrey. All the cobwebs and chervil, too.”

“We can’t restock until newleaf,” Frostnose mewed, padding toward the den, “but we should have enough for this. Just thank StarClan they didn’t do any more damage the first time they attacked.” (sorry for having so little commentary but it's 2:20 A.M.)

“Why did they choose MarshClan?” Ashstep complained.

“I have a feeling I know,” Thunderfang meowed. “They know this is a new camp, and their informant knows firstpaw the effects of some of these herbs.”

“That’s a no-brainer, but why not go to BlazeClan? They had to have been unable to fight back after the first attack.” Foxwhisker pawed at his whiskers; this was a nervous habit of his. “We surrendered right away.”

“That might be it,” Ashstep meowed.

“Forget it,” Thunderfang muttered.

“What did you mean, then?” asked Rustytail, cocking his head.

“I recognized one of those rogues.” He turned to face Willowstar; she had padded closer to him. “She took the juniper and clawed my ear.” He lifted his torn right ear. “Briarkit is alive.”

part 5: BRIAR

“This is it.”

Badger addressed them in his usual harsh snarl from low in the twisted branches of an old ash tree. He had sent Pomegranate and Quill to gather all of the rogues.

“This will be our camp. It is a suitable distance from water and from good hunting ground. We can reinforce it before telling the Clans we have moved.”

“They’ll know we’ve come here,” Quill meowed before anyone could point this out, “but they won’t find our camp. They can’t know this territory; Clan cats are too particular about boundaries to come out here.”

“We’ll have herbs growing soon enough. Shouldn’t need to restock from the Clans’ stores again this leafbare. That worked magnificently, by the way.” His voice cracked for a moment; it sounded painful.

“Got your nine lives yet?” a cat named Cynogale called.

“We haven’t figured out where the Moonfangs are,” Pomegranate answered in Quill’s voice. The Moonfangs were six pointed stones, Briar knew, but no one had ever told her where they were.

Quill was now glaring daggers at Pomegranate. It suddenly struck Briar how pompous he looked, sitting up on the exposed root of the ash tree looking down on the smaller tabby, and she snickered, batting an ear to tell Ripple and Tourmaline not to ask.

“We’re going to have to set up dens,” Badger snarled, and Briar snapped back to attention. “The leafbare ice brought down some branches. Turtle will arrange cats to collect those. Meanwhile Osage Orange and Rain Shatter are in charge of scanning nearby for anything that could attract foxes or other enemies.” He jerked his head upward. “This tree, by greenleaf, should give a lot of rain and sky shelter.”

“This is certainly refreshing after sitting around in that old marsh for a million seasons,” Tourmaline whispered, scanning the quickly moving clouds. “You don’t think it’s going to snow again, do you?”

“Might,” Briar replied.

“That’s it for now,” Badger concluded, flicking his right ear and hopping down from the tree. Quill and Pomegranate rose; Pinecone, lying next to the tree, lifted her muzzle and said something to Badger, and he stopped to speak with her.

“Wonder what it’s like for him to be a father,” Ripple meowed. There was something off about his voice, but when he noticed Briar looking at him, he ducked and swished his tail. “It’s just hard to imagine Badger falling in love.”

“I heard Pinecone was one of the first cats he picked up, though,” Briar pointed out. “They’ve got to have been mates for a while.”

Ripple nodded distantly.

“Come with us,” Osage Orange meowed sharply at him. Startled, Ripple leapt upright, hackles and tail bristling.

“Survey,” Rain Shatter offered by way of an explanation.

“Right. Right.” Ripple grinned and flattened out his sleek brown fur. “Bye, Tourmaline. Bri.”

Briar narrowed her eyes and watched him leave.

Tourmaline’s blue eyes were glittering strangely. Briar blinked at her, confused. Tourmaline didn’t say anything.

“Tourmaline!” a tom called. He was young and small, a sooty-looking gray tabby with black-rimmed sage green eyes. Briar thought his name was some type of fox.

“Quill wanted me to teach him to fish,” Tourmaline explained, then bounded toward him. “The stream is this way.”

“Wait for me,” Briar protested, following. The tom was a former BlazeClan prisoner; the rogues had taken him in, as well as a few other young cats, before leaving and giving OakClan an opportunity to rescue the others.

The stream was mostly unfrozen, though there were thin strips of ice in places along the bank. Tourmaline waded through it; Briar decided it wasn’t worth freezing her paws, and sat down by the water. The little tom paced back and forth, sniffing at the ice.

“It’s not that cold,” Tourmaline assured him, shaking water off her paws.

The tom tried to leap over the stream and landed in it with a splash. After a brief moment of flailing he bolted out and huddled close to the ground, shivering and looking spooked.

“Are you okay?” Tourmaline mewed, leaning toward him.

“I don’t like fishing,” the young tom wailed.

Tourmaline twitched her whiskers. “Most cats don’t swim when they fish.” She stretched, sat down, and looked at him expectantly. “Tell me when you’re dry enough to learn.”

The tom whimpered and began licking his chest fur.

Briar shuffled her paws awkwardly. She had expected Tourmaline to pay more attention to her; she supposed she could go hunting, but she hadn’t set off alone for quite a while.

She didn’t want to get too attached, she reminded herself, then shook her head. That was too cynical for the moment.

“I’m going mousing,” she mewed halfheartedly, padding away. There were still clumps of unmelted snow, but most of the ground was clear, though still damp and cold.

Briar poked her nose into a small hole at the base of a tree. Chipmunk. Stale. She drew back and glared at the hole. “Fox dung.”

It was nice, she thought, to walk through the forest alone—but it reminded her too much of the moons she had spent waiting for her Clan to come back. What if the rogues left her behind, too? She couldn’t count on them not to; they weren’t even related to her, any of them.

Briar returned to Badger’s twisted ash tree. Pomegranate was climbing through the branches. Badger lay beside Pinecone, whose eyes were closed in apparent pain. Turtle sat nearby, watching anxiously.

“Briar!” Pomegranate called, clambering down from the tree. “What’re you assigned today?”

“Nothing. I mean, nothing yet,” she corrected herself. “I went with Tourmaline, but the little fox guy fell into the creek and wouldn’t listen, so I came back.”

“Hmm.” Pomegranate waved her tail back and forth in thought. “Well, Badger’s satisfied, so you can hang around with us if you want.”

“I can look for branches to build up the dens,” Briar offered.

Pomegranate twitched her ear. “Good idea. Don’t bring anything you can’t carry alone, and don’t bother with anything Crossfox could.”

º º º

Ripple’s dark green eyes were clouded with exhaustion. “Orange dragged us all around the forest. I swear I’ve walked to the stars and back in a day.”

“My teeth are sore,” Briar complained, lifting a paw to her mouth.

Tourmaline huffed. “Crossfox didn’t catch a single fish.” She thought for a moment. “It’s not like there are that many fish right now, but there were a few.”

“Can we just go to sleep?” Ripple meowed. He sniffed at the ground. “No one had any time to look for any moss, then, huh?”

“Pomegranate got some for Pinecone and Badger, but that’s pretty much it,” Tourmaline confirmed.

Trying not to look embarrassed, Briar lay down on the ground. “It’s not that bad. At least it’s not wet here.”

“True,” Ripple murmured, curling up next to her. “And it’s getting warmer. That’s always a plus.”

Rising Tide and Osage Orange joined them, and they fell silent. Briar listened to the others breathing until she fell asleep.

º º º

“I slept horribly last night,” Briar moaned.

“I slept pretty well,” Ripple meowed.

“You always sleep like a log,” Tourmaline muttered. “Log-fur. Log-brain.”

Ripple twitched his pelt. “Whatever.”

Crossfox was waiting expectantly before them, but Tourmaline glared at him and he darted away with a squeak.

“I miss MarshClan,” Briar mewed suddenly. She wasn’t sure why she had said it; Ripple and Tourmaline stared at her wide-eyed. “I’m not thinking of going back,” she added hastily, “but I wish I could see Thunderkit and Juniperkit again. And Civetkit; she was my friend, too.”

“Quit while you’re ahead,” Tourmaline advised her. “Never know when we’ll pick up and leave anyway. We’ve made permanent camps before. They’ve never worked out.” (Briar should already know this shouldn't she)

“Hopefully it doesn’t happen,” rasped Rowan. His green eyes were dark with exhaustion; Briar assumed he had been standing sentry. “I’m not up for another move.”

“I wouldn’t mind traveling,” Briar admitted, “and I guess it might be good to get away from here anyway. It just feels…weird to be so close to them.” She fought off thoughts that had been pestering her for moons. “I wonder if any of my friends did try to look for me.”

“It doesn’t matter either way,” Rowan warned. “We’d have to be well established before we could even think of making alliances with cats we’ve just attacked. Never know who’ll turn out to be a spy.”

Briar wasn’t listening anymore. She had drifted off into the thoughts she was trying to ignore. Juniperkit was her mate; Thunderkit and Civetkit were her best friends once more. She wondered what their warrior names were. Juniperheart? Thundernose? Civetpelt?

Crossfox was back, pacing in wild circular patterns around the four cats without saying a word. Briar blinked.

“Bri and I are probably going to go hunting now,” Ripple was saying. He flicked his ear in her direction. “What do you say?”

Briar nodded silently. Focus on Ripple. That was it. All she had to do was pay attention to his dark green eyes, his pale whiskers, his otter-colored pelt… (I did decide that Briar and Ripple did not end up together, by the way; I didn't decide whether she got with Juniperflight or stayed a rogue)

They checked the hickory trees for bats but found none. Ripple led her down a slippery, muddy hill, glancing over his shoulder every now and then. “You okay?” he finally asked.

“I’m perfectly fine.” She sounded distant, even to herself. Briar coughed, hoping it didn’t sound too forced. “Sorry; my voice is going.”

Ripple twitched his whiskers. “Well, this looks like a good spot to hunt.”

Briar put her nose to the ground and crept away, straining to hear. She listened to Ripple’s pawsteps as he padded the other direction. There was another cat somewhere—and a mouse! She swiveled her ears and pinpointed its direction, then slowly pulled herself toward it.

Ripple shrieked.

Briar spotted the mouse as it streaked away; her fur bushing out, she whirled and dashed in Ripple’s direction.

“Get him off me,” Ripple squawked, batting at his assailant with all four paws from the ground where he was pinned.

“Thunderkit,” Briar breathed, halting. He looked up, teeth bared. There was white fur between them; glancing down, she saw a bite in Ripple’s chin. She shook her head and glared at her old friend. “Don’t hurt him.”

Thunderkit stepped off of Ripple, kicking him with a hind paw. Ripple bolted upright and sank his teeth into the tom’s long, thick fur and was immediately pushed away. (run on)

“Stop fighting,” Briar snarled. “What are you doing here?”

“Tracking you,” Thunderkit spat. “What are you doing with these rogues?”

“Living.”

“Well—don’t. (harsh) Come back to MarshClan.” He blinked. “And my name is Thunderfang now. Who is this?”

“Ripple,” Briar mewed warily. “Don’t kill him. I’m serious.”

“Is he your mate?” Thunderfang meowed suspiciously.” (what's this quotation mark doing here)

“Jealous?” Ripple muttered as Briar shook her head.

“This is my sister,” Thunderfang hissed, rounding on him.

“Sort of. Not exactly,” Briar corrected.

Thunderfang narrowed his bright coppery eyes. “Briar, do you remember what I did to Blackstorm?” When Briar didn’t answer (she had forgotten the name of the apprentice, though she could never forget the fight), he snarled, “I will do the same thing to every single rogue I come across, and I will start with this one.”

Looking uneasy, Ripple mouthed hold on and hared away, his tail fluffed up to twice its normal size. Thunderfang glanced over his shoulder with a hiss but didn’t pursue him, deciding instead to step closer to Briar.

“These rogues are cowards, liars, and savages. This is not where you belong. They are evil, Briar. Every last one of them. I thought you were smart enough to realize that. This is BlazeClan number two.”

“Badger is a good leader,” Briar growled, “and I do belong. Much more here than MarshClan.”

“MarshClan is your family.”

“I have no family.”

Thunderfang snarled at her. “You have me! You have Juniperflight! Why won’t you listen to reason?”

“Here I have Cynogale and Tourmaline.”

“What’s that, some sort of weird fish?” Thunderfang roared. “You can’t be serious!”

Ripple returned, cresting the hill at top speed. As Thunderfang looked up, the tuxedo tom landed on his shoulders and dug his claws into the warrior’s fur, clutching his throat.

Rain Shatter, Pomegranate, Tourmaline, and Rising Tide bounded down the hill and surrounded Thunderfang, swatting at him and slashing at his face. Ripple bit at the top of Thunderfang’s head. Briar watched as they fought, not quite sure what to do. Outnumbered five to one, Thunderfang had no chance of winning; inevitably they brought him, bleeding, to the ground.

“Traitor,” he choked out as the rogues herded him back toward their camp.

Thunderfang was their prisoner now.

(so I'm pretty sure Briar eventually caved in and freed him, as well as anyone else they were keeping prisoner, though I don't remember there being other prisoners…I don't think I ever decided whether she rejoined MarshClan or simply left when the rogues left)

The Heart of the Forest: Ominous Signs (document "Ominous Signs" created 11/09/2009 and last modified 1/13/2010)
written at my sister's request

SPOILER: Click to show

ALLEGIANCES (my sister wrote the allegiances)

RIVERCLAN:
Leader: Streamstar—silver-and-white she-cat, blue eyes
Deputy: Blackfire—black she-cat, green eyes
Medicine Cat: Squirrelpool—tan she-cat, green eyes, apprentice, Shimmerfire
Warriors:
Wildwhisker—tan tom, hazel eyes
Leafflight—tan she-cat, green eyes
Jayclaw—gray tabby-and-white tom, blue eyes
Blazingfang—red-gold she-cat, blue eyes
Whitefoot—black tom, white feet, green eyes
Hollytail—black she-cat, green eyes
Redfoot—reddish tom, orange eyes
Featherfur—silver she-cat, blue eyes
Stormtalon—dark gray tom, amber eyes
Darkface—dark gray tabby she-cat
Longwhisker—tan tom, black stripes, golden eyes
Apprentices:
Bluepaw—gray she-cat, blue eyes
Snowpaw—white she-cat, blue eyes
Tawnypaw—tan tom, green eyes
Goldpaw—golden tom, amber eyes
Shimmerfire—silver she-cat, amber eyes

SHADOWCLAN:
Leader: Hollystar—black she-cat, green eyes
Deputy: Lionfeather—gold tom, amber eyes
Medicine Cat: Jayblaze—gray tabby-and-white tom, apprentice, Rabbitpaw
Warriors:
Sorrelpelt—tortoiseshell she-cat, green eyes
Barkfur—dark brown tom, green eyes
Birdsky—white she-cat, black tailtip, yellow eyes, apprentice, Mousepaw
Wildwhisker—bracken-colored tabby tom, amber eyes
Whitewhisker—white she-cat, sky-blue eyes, apprentice, Thrushpaw
Hazelfur—ginger-and-white she-cat, apprentice, Volepaw
Flamefang—orange tom, red ears, black tailtip, one green eye, one yellow eye, apprentice, Finchpaw
Dustclaw—dark brown tom, green eyes
Brackentail—tan tabby tom, green eyes
Amberheart—reddish-gold longhaired tom, green eyes
Winterwing—white she-cat, green eyes
Apprentices:
Mousepaw—black tom, green eyes
Thrushpaw—tan she-cat, hazel eyes
Finchpaw—black-and-yellow she-cat, dark green eyes
Volepaw—tan tom, amber eyes
Rabbitpaw—brown she-cat, green eyes

THUNDERCLAN:
Leader: Brindlestar—tan she-cat, white muzzle + paws, green eyes, black penciled stripes, apprentice, Ravenpaw
Deputy: Boldstripe—bright orange tom, thick black stripes, amber eyes, apprentice, Squirrelpaw
Medicine Cat: Leafpelt—calico she-cat, blue eyes, apprentice, Hollywhisker
Warriors:
Firecloud—orange tom, green eyes, apprentice, Leafpaw
Graysand—gray tabby tom, yellow eyes
Sandtail—tan she-cat, amber eyes
Bramblepelt—dark brown tabby tom, amber eyes, apprentice, Lionpaw
Cinderclaw—longhaired gray she-cat, blue eyes, apprentice, Minkpaw
Fernfur—pale tan-and-gray she-cat, blue eyes
Ashcloud—longhaired gray-and-white tom, blue eyes, apprentice, Tigerpaw
Spottedwhisker—tortoiseshell tom, green eyes
Cinderstripe—gray tabby she-cat, dark blue eyes
Apprentices:
Squirrelpaw—tan she-cat, green eyes
Leafpaw—yellow-and-white tom, green eyes
Ravenpaw—dark gray tom, white diamond on forehead, yellow eyes
Lionpaw—gold tom, amber eyes
Tigerpaw—dark brown tabby tom, amber eyes
Minkpaw—rusty she-cat, blue eyes
Hollywhisker—black she-cat, green eyes

WINDCLAN:
Leader: Flowerstar—one-eared brown tabby she-cat, hazel eyes
Deputy: Gorsefire—tan tom, amber eyes
Medicine Cat: Liontail—gray tom, blue eyes
Warriors:
Jayfire—white tom, tufted tail, green eyes, apprentice, Breezepaw
Grassfur—tan tom, green eyes
Thornfur—brown tabby she-cat, green eyes
Lightningstripe—yellow tom, black stripes, orange eyes, apprentice, Heatherpaw
Brackenheart—tan tom, amber eyes
Nightfire—black-and-orange she-cat, amber eyes
Starpelt—white she-cat, yellow eyes, apprentice, Moonpaw
Rockfoot—gray-and-brown tom, green eyes
Pebblefur—silver she-cat, hazel eyes, apprentice, Sunpaw
Bramblefoot—tan tabby tom, yellow eyes
Apprentices:
Heatherpaw—bracken-colored she-cat, amber eyes
Breezepaw—golden tom, amber eyes
Sunpaw—yellow tom, golden eyes
Moonpaw—silvery-white she-cat, blue eyes

Prologue

A silver-maned she-cat leaned in towards Gingerstar. “Be warned,” the cat said, and rippled away into the shade. (please note that there is not a Gingerstar in the allegiances; I'm not sure whether my sister told me to use the name Gingerstar or I just ignored the allegiances and made up my own character)

“Wait! Pebblestar!”

The StarClan cat didn’t return. Instead, her former apprentice, Swiftpaw, killed by a badger at seven moons, appeared. “Great loss will come to ThunderClan as if you are rabbits on the moor. You cannot prevent this, but you can know beforehand. Still, it will be shocking. (even if she knows already!?) Gingerstripe—star—I want you to know that StarClan is always here, watching ThunderClan.”

“Swiftpaw, I’ve never doubted StarClan. I trust you to keep ThunderClan alive.”

“Alive, yes, but not a true Clan anymore. The cats must work hard, or they will start to doubt,” chirped another voice. It was Gingerstar’s StarClan mother, Skywing. “You, my kit, will be nearly powerless.” (I think "StarClan mother" just means her mother is dead)

“ThunderClan respects me. Even shattered into as many pieces possible, ThunderClan would heed my orders.” (missing an "as")

“Gingerstar, I know I’m only an apprentice, but I know this for sure: ThunderClan will never be exactly the same again. As the leader, you can choose to believe me or not. But StarClan has warned you.”

“Of what? Change is not always bad.” (did you not hear the part about great loss)

Skywing shook her head. “Not ordinary change. This is disaster. You must warn all of ThunderClan.”

“If they don’t trust me, as Swiftpaw may have been right about, why not tell Leafpelt to warn the Clan?” (Swiftpaw never said anything about that)

“Leafpelt is not the leader.”

“I know Leafpelt is not the leader. I am. She is the medicine cat. Cats trust medicine cats. If I have enemies within the Clan, they could be very angry and spread rumors about me—bad ones. Tell Leafpelt.” (calm down Gingerstar)

“If there are enemies within, then there are enemies within. What do rumors matter? You are a good leader.”

“Oh, Swiftpaw, I suppose you’re right.” (this sounds like she was fishing for compliments)

“Of course. Now wake up!” commanded Skywing.

Chapter One

Ravenpaw blinked as the morning sunlight shone rays of brightness onto her face. She shook her head and cleared it of spots, then padded uncertainly over to her mentor. “Gingerstar, when do I patrol?”

“Ravenpaw, how many times do I have to tell you? You’re training. All ThunderClan apprentices do on their first day.” (do they though)

Redstar's Task (document "Redstar's Task" created 7/24/2011 and last modified 1/2/2016)
but I quit it after like a month so I don't know why I went back five years later

SPOILER: Click to show

(that was nice of them to make for me)

98%; Redstar's Task is a very well written Fan Fic. It has lots of interesting moments and it gives readers and new point of view. Hollyfrost14 of StoneClan will keep you reading until the last chapter, ready for more! For fans of SkyClan, this is a great look at the forest without them. With different characters than the present books, all Erin Hunter lovers will enjoy a new flavor of writing with a touch of the classic forest.
~(same person who reviewed Broken Glass)

I don't like Redstar, but I thought it would be interesting to see ThunderClan right after SkyClan left. (isn't it always promising when the writer dislikes the main character? this was 100% a spitefic)

ThunderClan
Leader: Redstar--dark ginger tom with big white paws
Deputy: Seedpelt--gray she-cat with darker flecks
Medicine Cat: Kestrelwing--dark gray-brown tabby tom
Warriors:
Nettleclaw--gray tabby tom
Stormwind--stormy gray tabby tom
Cloudshadow--white tom with black spots (some of the names are pretty bad)
Moonwhisker--dappled silver she-cat
Thorntail--brown tabby tom
Cherryleaf--tortoiseshell she-cat
Amberclaw--golden tom
Silverbird--pale gray she-cat
Duskstorm--dark brown tom
Goldensong--dark honey-colored she-cat
Apprentices:
Gorsepaw--dark brown tabby tom (formerly SkyClan)
Spottedpaw--dark tortoiseshell she-cat (formerly SkyClan)
Hazelpaw--pale gray tabby she-cat with unusual hazel eyes (that's not remotely unusual)
Queens:
Birdflight--light brown tabby she-cat (formerly SkyClan) (Kits: Skykit, Foxkit, Stormkit, Cinderkit)
Pineshadow--gray tabby she-cat (Redstar's mate) (Kits: Crimsonkit, Carminekit, Cerisekit, Scarletkit) (I could see Crimson- and Scarlet- I guess but the other two are ridiculous)
Elders:
Cloverleaf--ginger tabby she-cat
Russetfox--dark ginger tom (why)

RiverClan
Leader: Birchstar--light brown tabby she-cat
Deputy: Sloefur--black she-cat
Medicine Cat: Icewhisker--silver-gray tom
Warriors:
Foxclaw--russet tom
Hickoryspot--brown spotted tom
Vineheart--gray tabby she-cat
Darkflight--black tom
Beestorm--golden tabby tom
Ebonyfire--sleek black she-cat
Laurelear--brown tom
Sunfrost--golden tabby tom
Swiftstream--silver tabby she-cat
Owlflight--brown tabby tom
Apprentices:
Ivypaw--white she-cat with silver tabby patches (wow I wonder who I liked in the canon series)
Leafpaw--gray-brown tabby she-cat
Splashpaw--gray-and-white tom

ShadowClan
Leader: Dawnstar--creamy brown she-cat
Deputy: Snaketail--brown tabby tom
Medicine Cat: Molepelt--small black tom
Warriors:
Hollowbelly--black-and-white tom
Foxflight--ginger tom with black paws
Sleetfall--mottled silver-gray she-cat
Rustlefire--small light brown tom
Tawnymist--pale tortoiseshell she-cat
Whiteblossom--longhaired white she-cat
Aspenheart--light brown she-cat
Goldencloud--golden tabby tom
Silverstorm--silver tabby tom
Apprentices:
Hawkpaw--brown tabby tom
Rosepaw--tawny she-cat with tall black ears
Violetpaw--light gray she-cat with white spots

WindClan
Leader: Swiftstar--dark gray tom
Deputy: Milkfur--creamy white tom
Medicine Cat: Larkwing--silver-and-black tabby she-cat
Warriors:
Hareflight--light brown she-cat
Graytail--gray tom
Frostfire--small white she-cat
Ivycloud--black tom with white spots
Ashleaf--gray-brown tabby she-cat
Apprentices:
Heatherpaw--golden she-cat
Copperpaw--brown tabby tom

(I didn't list SkyClan…?)

Review from (again I'm not here to drag people who aren't me): ~★★★★~ Redstar's Task is a well written story telling about what happens after SkyClan left the forest. This suspenseful, Mysterious fan-fiction will never disappoint you.

☆☆☆☆ "Redstar's Task is a truely amazing story about Redstar, and the stress of helping Birdflight and her six kits fit in. Will Redstar be able make them blend without causing an unnessicary battle? Read to find out!"-- (this one was a reviewing "company" it looks like? obviously only one person from there reviewed the story but I'm guessing it was a reviewing group)

Redstar's Task is a truly delightful, riveting, moving story that follows after SkyClan left the forest and a troubled leader. 5 stars!

PROLOGUE [It's the same as the Firestar's Quest prologue, but with Redstar's point of view: all the words spoken are the same, but I interpreted what Redstar might have been thinking. All credit for the spoken words, and some of the other words, too, goes to the Erins! The only thing I did was change the POV!]

Redstar twitched his ear. The muffled pawsteps behind him stopped; his Clan waited.

He heard a voice from behind: "Redstar? I can't smell SkyClan anywhere."

Redstar signaled for ThunderClan to join the other three Clans already waiting in the hollow. SkyClan was nowhere in sight. And I thought we were late!

Redstar crouched low to the ground and pushed off. His claws caught on the edge of the stone; he scrabbled his hindlegs around until he could scramble onto the Great Rock. (wow I was already showing how much I hated him)

Three cats--Swiftstar, Dawnstar, and Birchstar--waited. The light brown tabby she-cat dipped her head in greeting and mewed, "Welcome, Redstar." He dipped his head to acknowledge her words. She continued, "How's the prey running in ThunderClan?"

"We've plenty," Redstar meowed. "Thank you, Birchstar. Is all well in RiverClan?"

Birchstar didn't get a chance to reply; Swiftstar scraped his claws roughly against the hard gray stone of the Great Rock. "It's time the Gathering started. We're wasting time."

The fourth cat, a creamy brown she-cat, mewed, "We can't start yet, Swiftstar." She looked around the Great Rock pointedly. "We're not all here."

Swiftstar snorted. "WindClan have better things to do than sit about waiting for cats who can't be bothered to come at the proper time."

Redstar heard something. Apparently, Birchstar had heard it too. It was the whisper of leaf against fur.

"Look!" He pointed his tail to the top of the hollow. He could see the outline of a cat, shining in the moonlight.

The cat stood motionless. Then he swished his tail and bounded down into the bushes farther down in the hollow. Cats poured down behind him; branches and leaves rustled all through Fourtrees.

Dawnstar looked relieved. "There! SkyClan are here at last."

Swiftstar shook his head impatiently and rolled his eyes. "About time, too." He raised his voice. "Cloudstar! What kept you?"

Redstar couldn't help noticing once again how small and neat Cloudstar looked. The SkyClan leader didn't reply, but sprang easily to the Great Rock.

More cats had followed him than any other Clan; two she-cats even carried kits. Redstar knew he must look odd with his mouth open and his eyes stretched wide, but he couldn't help it. Is that every cat in SkyClan?

Swiftstar sprang to his paws. "Great StarClan! Cloudstar, any cat would think you'd brought your whole Clan to the Gathering."

Cloudstar met Swiftstar's puzzled expression with a calm, even, water-blue gaze. (water in rivers and stuff is hardly ever that blue) "Yes," he mewed. "I have."

Birchstar stared at him as if Cloudstar were crazy. "Why in the name of StarClan did you do that?"

Cloudstar sighed. "Because we can no longer live in our territory," he mewed heavily. "Twolegs have destroyed it."

"What?" Redstar leaped to his paws. "My patrols have reported more Twolegs in your territory, and noise from monsters, but they can't possibly have destroyed it all." (a lot of these lines are not reading as straight from the Erins but I don't have any version of this story on hand to check)

Cloudstar's gaze drifted away and wandered the clearing; he seemed to roam farther away than the moonlit bushes and blades of grass.

"They have. They came with huge monsters that pushed over our trees and churned up the earth. All our prey is dead or frightened off. The monsters are crouched around our camp now, waiting to pounce. SkyClan's home is gone. I have brought my Clan here to ask your help."

Redstar and Dawnstar eyed him suspiciously. Swiftstar glared furiously. Birchstar had a snidely pitying expression as she stared at the SkyClan leader.

"Well?" Redstar muttered. He sure hoped no one had heard him.

"You must give us some of your territories."

Redstar stretched his eyes and mouth open again. This time, he wasn't embarrassed; the other three leaders did the same. (no one ever makes that face)

Redstar could hear yowls of fury and protest from the cats gathered below. The SkyClan warriors seemed ready to defend against a furious attack.

Swiftstar replied first, trying to keep calm but spitting venom instead. "You can't just walk in here and ask for our territory. We can barely feed our own Clan as it is."

Redstar shifted his paws. He felt uneasy about this; he didn't want to seem as cold and unfeeling as Swiftstar. He didn't want anyone to hate him for his answer; but he was strongly against Cloudstar's greedy plan. It's not as bad as all that. ThunderClan's right by you, and we've been left untouched.

Cloudstar stared directly into Redstar's eyes. He gulped--Please don't let anyone have seen that!--and meowed in a harsher voice than he intended, "The prey is running well now in greenleaf, but what's going to happen in leaf-fall comes? ThunderClan won't be able to spare any then."

Dawnstar seemed to think Redstar had settled it. She rose and meowed, challenge flashing deep in her green eyes, "Nor will ShadowClan; my Clan is bigger than any other. We need every pawstep of ground to feed our own cats."

Redstar breathed a sigh of relief when Cloudstar simply turned helplessly to Birchstar and mewed pleadingly, "Birchstar? What do you think?"

"I'd like to help. I really would. But the river is very low and it's harder than ever to catch enough fish. Besides, SkyClan cats don't know how to fish." (see there's no way the first part of that was from the Erins)

Swiftstar cut in. "Exactly. And only WindClan cats are fast enough to catch rabbits and birds on the moors. There's certainly nowhere in our territory where you could make a camp. You'd soon get tired of sleeping under gorse bushes."

"Then what is my Clan supposed to do?"

The clearing grew silent. Redstar broke the silence: "Leave."

Swiftstar snarled, "That's right. Leave the forest and find yourself another place, far enough away that you can't steal our prey." (just go live at Highstones???)

Larkwing, a WindClan cat, raised her voice. "Swiftstar, as your medicine cat, I can tell you that StarClan won't be pleased if the rest of us drive out SkyClan. There have always been five Clans in the forest."

Swiftstar stared at her. "You say you know the will of StarClan, Larkwing, but can you tell me why the moon is still shining? If StarClan didn't agree that SkyClan should leave the forest, they would send clouds to cover the sky." Larkwing shook her head. Redstar couldn't think of an answer, either--not that he tried. He didn't care where Cloudstar went, as long as he left ThunderClan alone.

"Five Clans have lived in this forest for longer than any cat can remember," Cloudstar protested. "Doesn't that mean anything to you?"

Redstar glared at him. "Things change. Is it possible that the will of StarClan has changed also? StarClan gave each Clan the skills they need to survive in their own territory. RiverClan cats swim well. ThunderClan cats are good at stalking prey in the undergrowth. SkyClan cats can leap into trees because there's not much cover in their territory. (why did I add so much unnecessary stuff) Doesn't this mean that each Clan couldn't live in another Clan's territory?"

A black tom called out, "You keep saying that StarClan wants five Clans in the forest, but are you sure that's true? There are four oaks here at Fourtrees. That could be a sign that there should only be four Clans."

"SkyClan don't belong here," a silver tabby snarled. "Let's drive them out now." The SkyClan warriors bristled, unsheathing their claws.

"Stop!" Cloudstar called. "Warriors of SkyClan, we are not cowards, but this is a battle we cannot win. We have seen tonight what the warrior code is worth. From now on we will be alone, and we will depend on no cat but ourselves. (what did I have against end punctuation)

Cloudstar leaped from the Great Rock; a sense of finality hung in the air. He padded over to a light brown tabby she-cat; her belly was swollen with kits, and two older kits--probably six moons old--sat at her paws as well. (I remembered a version where her kits were already born and decided to combine the versions--even if the first was a figment of my imagination) I'm surprised any cat can have so many kits! Redstar thought. Then again, SkyClan cats probably have more so that more survive. Weaklings. (wow I really hated Redstar)

Cloudstar and the tabby whispered together. Kestrelwing, Redstar's medicine cat, joined them. Something had happened.

Redstar was doubly sure of that when Cloudstar led SkyClan up the slope--without the tabby.

"That is Birdflight, his mate," Kestrelwing hissed into Redstar's ear. "She must stay, along with her kits. She is Cloudstar's mate."

Redstar called after Cloudstar, "May StarClan go with you!"

Cloudstar gave him a cold gaze.

"StarClan may go where they please. They have betrayed SkyClan. From this day on, I will have nothing more to do with our warrior ancestors. StarClan allowed the Twolegs to destroy our home. They look down on us now, and let the moon go on shining while you drive us out. They said there would always be five Clans in the forest, but they lied. SkyClan will never look to the stars again."

Redstar could only watch as the cat he'd once called a friend disappeared over the hill, never to be seen again.

CHAPTER ONE

"No, Hazelpaw!" Redstar cried, but the damage had been done. His apprentice went tumbling down the ravine. Such a mouse-brain. Redstar padded down to join her, sighing with amusement. "Hazelpaw, next time, watch where you're going! It's bad enough I have to help with the others' training without you losing control all the time."

"Sorry!" Hazelpaw yelped as she scrambled to her paws, looking dazed. "I wanted to go say hello to Birdflight's new kits."

"You won't get to see them by falling in the ravine," Redstar pointed out. (ravines are a bigger problem than this)

Hazelpaw ducked her head, embarrassed. "I didn't mean to," she mumbled.

Redstar started up the ravine. Hazelpaw bounded after him, rattling leaves and branches all over.

"Shh!" Redstar hissed. "ThunderClan cats might be hunting here!"

Hazelpaw seemed to shrink in her pelt. "Sorry!"

Redstar sighed again. "It's okay. Just be quiet."

He climbed over the edge of the ravine and waited for Hazelpaw. Is she even coming? His apprentice wasn't quiet enough to surprise him--was she?

A muffled cry of "Mouse dung!" confirmed that Hazelpaw was moving--loudly. Well, isn't that why I wanted to mentor her? Because none of the warriors could handle her? Hazelpaw's pale gray face appeared over the hill; her pencil-thin tabby markings were barely visible, but that might have had something to do with the leaves all over her back.

"What happened?" Redstar meowed.

"The bush was really wet from all that rain and the leaves had spines. It was a holly bush. And now the spines are stuck in my fur and they won't go away 'cause the leaves are wet and they're sticking to my fur!" Hazelpaw wailed. (confession: I have never seen a holly bush, only trees, but I guess they're a thing over in England? there are holly bushes in the real series)

Redstar shook his head and slipped through the gorse tunnel. Hazelpaw pulled the leaves from her pelt and followed.

"Welcome back," Kestrelwing muttered as they passed. "Glad to see you were so helpful to Birdflight. I told you and Hazelpaw that the most helpful thing for the Clan would be to gather herbs." He looked amused and puzzled, but Redstar heard the barb of sarcasm in his voice.

"We got sidetracked." Redstar flicked his tail at Hazelpaw. "She makes too much noise."

Hazelpaw flattened her ears as Kestrelwing nodded his head. "I heard," the medicine cat growled dryly. "Redstar, why don't you let Cherryleaf mentor her, just for now?"

"No!" Redstar glared at Kestrelwing. "She's halfway through her training, and I will be her mentor!"

He noticed, out of the corner of his eye, that Hazelpaw had begun to slink away. Probably to see Birdflight.

Redstar bounded over to his apprentice. "Checking Birdflight?" Hazelpaw nodded. "Don't bother--she'll be sleeping. Go sit with Gorsepaw and Spottedpaw."

His apprentice took a squirrel from the fresh-kill pile and went to join the SkyClan apprentices--Birdflight's first litter.

Redstar didn't know cats could have more kittens so soon, but then, he couldn’t have kits at all. He didn't care that much, anyway: if she-cats wanted to have so many kits, they could have a lot of kits. (I feel like I did slightly better on the unreliable narrator front here than I did in SP but that's not saying much)

Redstar poked his head into the nursery. As always, his gaze lit up when he saw his son and daughters. His gaze flickered to Birdflight. She had four tiny kits curled up beside her, but she was awake.

"What are their names?" he meowed.

Birdflight laid her tail gently on the first kit, a gray and ginger patched one. "Cinderkit." She lifted her tail again and placed it gently on a tawny ginger tom. "Foxkit." She gestured to a stormy gray tabby. "Stormkit." The fourth kit was smaller and neater; it was gray, with white patches. "That is Skykit."

Skykit! After SkyClan! Redstar's mind raced. I can't let her name him Skykit!

"These are SkyClan kits," she reminded him. "As are Gorsepaw and Spottedpaw."

Redstar sighed again. There was more SkyClan blood in ThunderClan--I'm going to be working day and night to fit these cats in.

Redstar licked the head of each of his kits. "Sleep well, Pineshadow," he murmured.

"I'll try," she mewed, "but these kits are going to keep me awake all night."

Redstar purred and backed out of the den. Maybe, just maybe, things will turn out okay. (you are your own biggest problem)

CHAPTER TWO

Redstar wasn't looking forward to the Gathering. (I love timeskips)

He hadn't had the best day, what with Hazelpaw being so clumsy, and Skykit looking so much like Cloudstar. Was StarClan punishing him? Besides, he regretted making SkyClan leave the forest. (too little too late)

"Redstar?" It was Seedpelt's voice. He turned to see the gray she-cat standing in the mouth of the den, silhouetted against the setting sun. Just like Cloudstar was... (this sounds like he's pining after a lost love)

"What?" He hadn't meant to snap.

Seedpelt took a step back, lashing her tail uncomfortably, then mewed, "Have you decided who to take to the Gathering?"

Mouse dung! Redstar hadn't thought about that. To his deputy, he muttered, "Yes."

Seedpelt dipped her head and padded out of the den. Redstar thought for a minute. I won't take any of the SkyClan cats. Hazelpaw deserves to go... I'd better take Cherryleaf and Cloudshadow, too. And Amberclaw.

Redstar yawned, stretched, and padded out of his den. He sprang up to the Highrock and took a deep breath. Redstar yowled, "Let all cats old enough to catch their own prey join beneath the Highrock for a Clan meeting!" He must have said that a thousand times; the words were no different from usual, but they were strangely comforting.

Despite the fact that they weren't apprentices, Redstar's kits bounded out of the nursery. Silly kits, Redstar thought with affection. They'll be apprentices soon enough.

"Tonight, we will join at the first Gathering since SkyClan. I don't want any mention of SkyClan. The only thing I will say about them is that we now shelter Birdflight and six SkyClan kits."

"Don't even mention her," Cloudshadow called. "Let the other Clans think we don't care. Then we will forget all about it in only a few generations."

"That's another thing," Redstar continued, "I don't want anyone to tell the kits where they come from. I want SkyClan's memory to fade away so cats of the future are not burdened by the thoughts that their Clans wronged the fifth. We did not wrong SkyClan; they tried to take our territory, and we refused to give it to them. I want no mention of SkyClan. Ever." (is this AtA)

Gorsepaw's amber eyes were round with fear; Spottedpaw looked like she was about to wail. Redstar knew Birdflight had heard him, too. Sorry, Cloudstar, but this is what I must do... for ThunderClan.

"Tonight I will take Seedpelt, Kestrelwing, Nettleclaw, Cloudshadow, Goldensong, Duskshadow, Thorntail, Cherryleaf, Amberclaw, and Hazelpaw to the Gathering. Cloverleaf, Russetfox, you may join us if you wish."

Hazelpaw's eyes lit up and she bounced up and down. Redstar could imagine the little she-cat's thoughts: He doesn't care I'm clumsy! He wants me at the Gathering! They were written all over her face.

Redstar leaped down from the Highrock and nodded to Russetfox; the dark ginger tom had joined the cluster of warriors ready to go to the Gathering. Cloverleaf was just a few pawsteps behind.

Redstar lowered his tail and whisked into the forest, his Clan following. Whether he liked it or not, Redstar was leader of ThunderClan, and he would have to stay strong.

CHAPTER THREE

The stars were pinpricks of light in the sky, some barely visible near the moon, which was as round and pale as Redstar had ever seen it. (it is a full moon)

If only SkyClan were here. Redstar hadn't much cared a moon ago, but now every Clan felt the loss as deeply as if their own souls had traveled with the lost Clan.

He'd never felt so much heaviness in the air at a Gathering, not even when Swiftstar had launched a full-scale invasion into ShadowClan territory the day before the full moon. Why was this Gathering so tense and spooky?

This was a different kind of invasion. SkyClan had left a hole in each of their hearts.

Redstar clambered up to the top of the Great Rock. Swiftstar had a fierce snarl on his face, probably to mask his sorrow and make WindClan appear strong. Birchstar's eyes glimmered with loss and sadness. Dawnstar was turned away so Redstar couldn't see her face, but he knew that she was mourning too.

Redstar swallowed. In the past, SkyClan had usually been the first to speak at Gatherings. He choked back a yowl and spoke, as calmly as possible. "ThunderClan is doing well. Birdflight is sheltering with us, as well as her six kits."

"Six?" A third emotion--astonishment--flickered into Birchstar's eyes to join the suffering and mourning he'd seen before. "I thought there were only two?"

"True," Redstar admitted. "Before today, she had only two kits--Gorsepaw and Spottedpaw. Gorsepaw is Thorntail's apprentice. Silverbird is mentoring Spottedpaw. Birdflight has four more new kits."

"Now I will speak," Swiftstar growled, shouldering the other leaders aside. His green eyes were the only betrayal of his otherwise fierce expression; a glitter of sadness flickered for just a heartbeat before his gaze hardened again. "WindClan has a new warrior, Heatherfall, and a new apprentice, Russetpaw. How is the prey running in ShadowClan?" (was "Heatherfall" my idea of a joke)

Dawnstar slowly turned back to face the gathered Clans. When she spoke the words were empty, as if she were reciting them instead of speaking to the cats below. "The prey is running well. Violetpaw and Hawkpaw are nearly warriors, and we are proud to say we are doing very well." She'd never seemed so distant before.

The most alarming thing about the ShadowClan leader was her hollow gaze. She seemed oblivious to everything around her. Redstar felt a lump, like a stone, in his throat just looking at her.

Birchstar padded uncertainly to the edge of the Great Rock. "RiverClan is hunting well," she mewed, then closed her eyes and continued, "We have a new warrior, Splashfoot. Icewhisker has taken Owlflight as his apprentice, since Owlflight is a young, eager warrior." Her words sped up as she spoke.

Hunting well? Yeah, right. Redstar guessed it must be the Twolegs, poisoning the river or scaring the fish; all the RiverClan cats looked smaller than normal.

"I guess this concludes the Gathering," he finished weakly. Cloudstar had made it seem so easy to end the Gathering. A moon ago, he'd ended it with more skill than ever before: by leading SkyClan away from the forest that was once their home, Redstar reflected sorrowfully.

Oh, StarClan, please don't let those awful Twolegs destroy ThunderClan, too! (now you're worried!?)

CHAPTER FOUR

"Pineshadow?" Redstar mewed, trying not to wake Birdflight's four tiny kits. "Make sure the kits are extra clean. They're six moons old." (for clarification, Pineshadow's kits are six moons old, not Birdflight's)

Oops. He'd been a little too loud. Cinderkit cracked open one of her eyes and Redstar froze. If those kits wake up so early in the morning, they'll wake the whole Clan. And no one likes to have their sleep interrupted by kits from another Clan!

Almost a quarter moon had passed since the Gathering. ThunderClan still hadn't seemed to accept the SkyClan cats. Redstar would have to train them all himself.

Wait--she opened her eye? Redstar didn't know much about kits, but he'd heard from Pineshadow that Birdflight's kits weren't opening their eyes yet. Cinderkit's first sight was of her Clan leader! Redstar realized proudly. (kits open their eyes 7-10 days after birth)

Cinderkit's eye closed again, and Redstar pulled out of the den as if stung.

Hazelpaw, Gorsepaw, and Spottedpaw all waited by the fresh-kill pile. Nearby were Thorntail and Silverbird. Training! Redstar nodded to the Thun∂erClan warriors; they padded after him.

The three apprentices, however, were a different story. Hazelpaw was clumsy; the SkyClan cats weren't used to undergrowth, and they kept getting stuck in brambles and holly bushes.

When they finally reached the training hollow, Gorsepaw had a holly leaf on his head, Spottedpaw had a thorn in her pelt--fortunately pointing sideways, not into her belly--and Hazelpaw had twigs stuck in her fur.

Silverbird pulled the thorn out of her apprentice. Gorsepaw sheepishly swept his paw up to knock the leaf away. Redstar helped Hazelpaw get rid of her twigs.

"Let's see if we can be quiet," Redstar meowed. "I want Hazelpaw to try to sneak through there." He pointed to a clump of ferns. Then he turned to Spottedpaw. "See if you can creep under a bramble bush. Gorsepaw, Thorntail will take you hunting." Only two at a time for the silence lessons...

Redstar listened carefully. A slight rustle told him Hazelpaw was creeping through the ferns. Apparently his apprentice could be quiet when she tried hard enough.

Then he heard a rustling sound, and part of the bramble bush pulled away from the clearing.

"Help!" yowled a young cat. (yeah this part doesn't make any sense)

"Spottedpaw!" Hazelpaw shrieked, just as loudly. She flew into the bramble bush. "Spottedpaw!" she yowled. "Can you--ow, ow, ow!" Hazelpaw twisted and flung herself out of the bush. A thorn had stabbed into her face, just below her eye.

Redstar sighed. She'll never learn, will she? "Hazelpaw, go see Kestrelwing."

"But-" she started.

"Immediately." His apprentice nodded reluctantly and padded away, glancing back ruefully at the bramble bush. Silverbird glanced at Redstar, who nodded. The pale gray she-cat hared after Redstar's apprentice. I hope Hazelpaw doesn't fall in the ravine again, Redstar thought as he flattened himself and crept under the bush. The brambles strained away from the clearing.

Spottedpaw's forepaws were tangled in the bramble bush, which dipped into a yawning hole in the earth. Mud streaked her hind paws. She had her eyes closed and her teeth clenched around a bramble.

Redstar stared for a moment, assessing the situation, then meowed, "Untangle your paws and come out."

"I can't!" Spottedpaw wailed. "The hole opened up when I stepped on it and I tried to jump off a falling stone but there was too much bramble and I got stuck!" Her voice rose to a terrified squeak, and she didn't stop to take a breath.

"Let me help." Redstar reached up and tugged at the brambles ensnaring the apprentice. He gripped one firmly in his teeth and yanked on it, satisfied when he felt it pull free.

Spottedpaw jerked her foreleg away from the brambles. A bramble thorn scratched her paw pad and she squealed.

Redstar released another bramble, from her other forepaw.

Oops--he didn't realize that the ground was so soft where he was standing. (look how much I hated him) As he pulled the bramble away, the soft earth gave way, and both Spottedpaw and Redstar tumbled through to a hole below.

"This must have been a badger's sett once," Redstar muttered through clenched teeth, nodding toward a tuft of strong-smelling black-and-white fur. (wouldn't the scent alone be enough) "We've never gone through this bush before, and no one ever found it. But see, there's the scent of badger. Strong, but the badger probably hasn't been here for a long time. Badger scent is always strong. We should be safe. Maybe someone will find us." (how did they not know a badger had been coming through here)

"No," Spottedpaw whimpered. "I don't want to be in here forever!"

"We won't be," Redstar assured her. He tried to stand. "Ow!" he spat through gritted teeth. He'd landed on his shoulder, and he couldn't put his full weight on it. Besides, there was something wrong with one of his hind paws. It hurt--a stone must have hit it as he fell.

"I can jump out!" Spottedpaw cried suddenly. "I couldn't jump before, since there was a bramble in the way. But you pulled the brambles out of the way, and I can get out now!" (no you can't the whole ground collapsed)

Redstar closed his eyes and lowered his head. "Sure," he muttered. Oh, StarClan, why are you punishing me? Why do I have to be rescued by this--this SkyClan apprentice?

Spottedpaw struggled to her feet and tensed. She sprang nimbly out of the hole, scrabbling at the earth with her hind paws as she clawed her way over the rim.

Earth fell from the far side of the hole, where a large pile had settled in the collapse.

A stone clattered to the ground. Redstar froze. He had a feeling he wasn't alone.

"StarClan, help me," he breathed as the first clawed paw burst into the hole. (yeah no one has ever noticed the badger over here)

CHAPTER FIVE

The paw retreated, the wicked claws disappearing. Redstar tried to climb out of the hole, but all he could manage was to scuff up the earth around him a little.

My ginger pelt will stand out like a flame does on the darkest night! (when have you seen a flame)

Redstar felt panicked. He'd never felt--or actually been-- so vulnerable, so...trapped. The badger could take all six of his remaining lives while Redstar was in this condition.

Help me! he wanted to wail, but he knew he had to remain as still as possible. Maybe, if the badger didn't think he was alive, it would leave him alone until someone attacked it from above.

A black-and-white muzzle pushed through the large gap from the shadows. Its teeth gleamed; its eyes had a dark sparkle, like black stars. That's the biggest badger I've ever seen!

Redstar closed his eyes, then thought better of it and opened one just as far as he dared. I want to see what happens. I have to be brave because it's even worse when it's impossible to see what's going on...

The badger's black-and-white muzzle was twitching slightly. It smells cat. It focused on Redstar. No! He drew in his breath sharply.

The badger lumbered over to him. Redstar relaxed his whole body, hoping against all hope it would think he was dead.

The badger opened its large mouth. Did badgers taste the air like cats? He didn't know. Badgers were badgers, and no one wanted to get too close. Redstar could just barely see out of the corner of his eye, but the badger's teeth were unmistakable.

Then the badger swiped a paw down Redstar's flank. He howled in pain.

"Why don't you do battle with someone who can fight back?"

The challenge came from the other side of the badger. The badger turned in confusion. Redstar lifted his head. The badger spun around and the ThunderClan leader flinched.

The badger turned again as someone swiped at it. It charged after a patrol of warriors. Amberclaw stood directly in its path. Redstar stared in horror. It's going to kill my brother! (then do something!?)

Amberclaw stepped aside; the badger narrowly missed his exposed throat.

Instead, the badger raked its wicked, thorn-sharp claws down Amberclaw's shoulder. Cloudshadow sprang onto its back and scratched its ear. The badger whirled around, trying to throw off its attacker. Moonwhisker and Stormwind dashed in to claw and tease the badger.

Thorntail and Cherryleaf dashed over to Redstar. He struggled to his paws, sinking down again when he tried to put weight on his right hind paw.

Thorntail supported him on his right. Redstar leaned against him. Cherryleaf helped Thorntail take Redstar out of the pit, using the hole the badger had come in through.

Redstar and the two warriors stumbled back to camp. They helped him lie down in Kestrelwing's den.

"You bruised your shoulder," Kestrelwing announced immediately. He carefully placed a paw on Redstar's hind paw. "And you almost broke your paw. It will heal quickly. Let me get a piece of bark."

Kestrelwing returned a moment later with some kind of leaf, a stiff piece of bark, and long grass.

"I figured out how to stick a piece of bark onto a tail or paw," Kestrelwing explained. He methodically applied the herbs to Redstar's shoulder and hind paw, then laid the bark just behind Redstar's paw. He broke off the parts that extended beyond Redstar's paw and wrapped grass around it. He made a loop of grass around Redstar's paw and the bark, then pulled one end of the grass through. He repeated that with more grass. (how is a cat tying knots)

"It will keep your paw from being injured further," he meowed.

Redstar thanked the medicine cat and pushed out of the den, wincing each time he set down his injured paw.

Redstar climbed to the top of the Highrock. The rescue patrol had returned by now; Amberclaw limped into the medicine den. Thorntail followed him; blood streamed from his ears and a ragged wound across his nose. Cherryleaf had a scar down her back, but it wasn't deep; she glanced up at Redstar briefly, then sat and waited.

Now, thought Redstar, he could finally complete the ceremony he'd been hoping for all day.

"Let all cats old enough to catch their own prey join beneath the Highrock for a Clan meeting!" he yowled, watching with pride as four dark ginger kits dashed after their mother to sit with the quickly gathering Clan.

CHAPTER SIX

"Crimsonkit!" Redstar meowed.

His son's dark auburn pelt was clearly visible, flashing among the grays and browns of the rest of ThunderClan as the kit weaved his way to the front of the group.

"Crimsonkit, from this day on, until you have received the name of a warrior, you will be known as Crimsonpaw."

Redstar cast his gaze around the Clan. Who should mentor my son? His gaze settled on Cloudshadow. There. (you didn't decide already)

"Cloudshadow, you are ready for an apprentice. You will be mentor to Crimsonpaw. I trust you will pass on to him everything you know."

Cloudshadow dipped his head to Redstar, then touched noses with the new apprentice.

"Scarletkit?" The brighter ginger kit's pelt flashed even more than Crimsonpaw's. "From this day forward, until you receive a warrior name, you will be known as Scarletpaw."

Scarletpaw swished her tail happily, her yellow eyes shining. Crimsonpaw glared daggers at her.

"Moonwhisker, you have shown yourself to be worthy of a second apprentice. May you pass all your skills on to Scarletpaw."

Moonwhisker padded to the front and bent to touch Scarletpaw's nose.

Stormwind looked unsettled and suspicious. He was giving Redstar a wary stare. He flicked an ear toward the other two kits, then toward Kestrelwing, and shook his head vigorously. Why can't they be the medicine apprentice? (oh right I forgot there was a "reason" for this)

"Carminekit?"

Carminekit was the reddest of all the kits; her pelt blazed brightly in the sunlight.

"Carminekit, from this moment forward, until you have earned your warrior name, you will be known as Carminepaw. Your mentor will be Stormwind; Stormwind, I expect you to teach her all you know."

"That I will," Stormwind called, to the amused purrs of many cats. He bounded to join Carminepaw, who reluctantly touched his nose.

She hopped over to the base of the Highrock and squeaked, "But I wanted to be Kestrelwing's apprentice! And Cerisekit did too!"

Stormwind's ears flicked back. Redstar's did, too. "I'm sorry, Carminepaw, but you must train as a warrior."

"Why?" she challenged. Redstar sighed. Kits were so stubborn. "Did StarClan say so?"

Redstar thought for half a second and then meowed, "Yes, StarClan said all of my kits had to be warriors." (you're saying this in front of the whole Clan, you know)

"Oh." Carminepaw looked more disappointed than Redstar had ever seen her. He saw Cerisekit looking sad, too.

"Cerisekit, from this day on--until you are a warrior--you will be known as Cerisepaw." He scanned ThunderClan again. "Nettleclaw, you have mentored many apprentices. I trust you will pass on all you know to Cerisepaw."

Cerisepaw reluctantly stretched to touch Nettleclaw's nose.

Redstar glanced back at Kestrelwing. The medicine cat turned away. Does he approve of my choice?

There was no way to tell. (um, he wouldn't look at you, so I'm thinking no?)

I'll just have to trust Stormwind's instincts--and mine. His kits were natural-born warriors. If only they could see that.

CHAPTER SEVEN

"I don't wanna go hunting!"

"Well, we have to!" Redstar could hear Carminepaw and Cerisepaw whining. He was pretty sure Carminepaw was the one trying to force Cerisepaw to come out of the apprentices' den.

Hazelpaw trotted out, giving a huge yawn. "Hi, Redstar! Carminepaw and Cerisepaw don't want to hunt."

Redstar felt Stormwind's presence before he even heard his pawsteps, distinctive like the most distant thunder, whispering on the breeze. Stormwind had an aura, almost, like the winds of a storm. That was why Redstar had named him Stormwind--the first warrior he'd ever named. (um)

"I'll go get Carminepaw," the stormy gray warrior growled. He never spoke loudly. His voice was a rumble of thunder, too. Redstar was impressed at how much the warrior had become his name. (Redstar you're probably too old for Stormwind if you became leader while he was an apprentice)

Redstar turned to Hazelpaw as Stormwind padded away--were his pawsteps soft or heavy? (there is not a single person who cares)

Then a much lighter set of pawprints caught Redstar's attention. "You're taking the kits out hunting?" Pineshadow swished her tail, letting it curl around Redstar as she turned in front of him. "Just make sure to let their mentors do the training." Her voice was like honey to Redstar, sweet and refreshing.

The stormy presence returned; Stormwind padded back from the apprentices' den. Two very red apprentices followed him glumly.

Redstar heard more pawsteps approaching. He turned to see Cloudshadow--he was silent in the camp except for a whisper of ruffling fur--and Moonwhisker, who was given away only by a tiny drag on one hind leg. Probably showing off stalking skills.

Sure enough, Crimsonpaw and Scarletpaw followed them, moving awkwardly but surprisingly quietly for two new apprentices.

Cerisepaw sat down heavily. "I'm not going."

Carminepaw dropped down next to her. "Me either."

Pineshadow shot a look at Redstar as if to say, Maybe they should have been medicine cats after all, and mewed, "I know you'd rather be medicine cats, but your brother and sister are waiting to train. Why don't you go try it out, and see how you like being warriors?" (see this could have made slightly more sense if they'd said "you can't both be the medicine cat so decide between yourselves or both be warriors" or something like that)

"Oh, all right," Carminepaw muttered, pushing herself up onto her paws. "Come on, Cherries."

"Don't call me Cherries, Carminepaw!"

"What?" Carminepaw smirked. "I can't help it if your name is Cherriespaw."

Cerisepaw sprang at her sister. Carminepaw let out a tiny shriek of surprise.

"Come on," Hazelpaw mewed, "let's go train. You'll like it once we start training!"

Cerisepaw and Carminepaw skittered away from each other and scrambled to their paws. "Coming!"

Redstar twitched his whiskers. Maybe training with the other apprentices would change his daughters' minds.

Besides, he thought, I realized last night that Stormwind was right. If Skykit is a warrior, he'll ruin our Clan. I can make him the medicine apprentice--Stormwind saved ThunderClan.

CHAPTER EIGHT

"Don't correct him until he's satisfied," Pineshadow murmured in Redstar's ear. Crimsonpaw was trying to do the hunter's crouch, but he was only flattening himself awkwardly. Redstar was sure Crimsonpaw's eyes were bulging out of his head.

"Pineshadow, if I don't correct him, how will he learn?" Redstar tried not to let his irritation show. "Crimsonpaw, you're doing it all wrong. Here, let me show you." (quit being a helicopter and go lead the Clan)

"Who's the mentor here, me or you?" spat Cloudshadow, then slapped his tail over his mouth; his ice blue eyes widened. "Sorry, Redstar!" the warrior squeaked, and he darted backward. "Go ahead and train him!"

Redstar shot the patched warrior a glare. Train him? he growled inwardly. It seems like I'd do a better job than you. He shook his head, and meowed, "He'll be a good warrior no matter who trains him."

Cloudshadow returned his icy glare. "Very well, then, you train him. See how much better you can do."

"Fine, then," Redstar snapped, "I will." (okay my hatred of Redstar is pretty funny by now)

He felt Pineshadow's presence behind him. She stretched forward her neck until she could whisper into his ear, "Let him mentor his apprentice. You need to give the warriors a chance. They're strong. They'll teach our kits everything a warrior needs to know." She said warrior bitterly. I wonder why... (why do you think!?)

Cerisepaw and Carminepaw stampeded past; Cerisepaw was snapping her jaws at Carminepaw's tail. Carminepaw swished her long, silky tail around, just out of reach of her sister's teeth. A moment later, Stormwind and Nettleclaw crashed out of the underbrush behind them. Stormwind had a ragged tear in his ear, and a swollen eye; Nettleclaw had tiny scars. What on earth happened?

The two warriors stopped, panting heavily. Nettleclaw gasped, "They started running through the 'paw tunnels." The 'paw tunnels were the places where bramble bushes rose just high enough for small apprentices and kits to dash through; obviously, Stormwind and Nettleclaw had tried to follow their unruly apprentices. (uh…)

Carminepaw stumbled and Cerisepaw tripped over the long, silky red tail. "Ow."

"Father!" Carminepaw squeaked, hopping onto her paws. Redstar twitched his whiskers, amused. His kits were young enough that they weren't even winded from the long dash under brambles; they were still enthusiastic and excited to be apprentices at last. "We ran away from Stormwind and Nettyclaw!"

"I told you, my name is Nettleclaw, not Nettyclaw!" Nettleclaw growled impatiently. "Will you start calling me by my real name for once?"

"Sor-ry," Carminepaw muttered. She stuck her tongue out at Nettleclaw. "You tried to make me learn front swipy attacks and front blows." She sighed as if the warriors would never learn. "I'm going to be a medicine cat, called Carminewing."

"No, you can't," Cerisepaw squeaked. "I'm going to be Cerisewing the medicine cat and you'll be Carmineshadow, the warrior." (are you sure these two are six moons old)

"Am not!" Carminepaw shouted.

Redstar stared into his daughters' eyes. "I'm sorry, but StarClan says you both have to be warriors. How about Carmineshadow and Cerisewhisker?"

"No!" his daughters squeaked together.

"Scarletpaw," Moonwhisker mewed patiently from the other side of the clearing, "I told you to keep your tail down."

What am I doing, arguing with kits? I should be training Hazelpaw, not telling my kits what they already know!

Redstar winced as he put too much weight on his injured hind paw. The bark felt rough against the back of his ankle, but it seemed to hold it in place well. He wondered if Kestrelwing could teach the warriors how to attach bark to hind paws, too. What exactly had he done with the grass? Redstar couldn't remember.

"Okay, Hazelpaw, will you demonstrate how to catch prey? Pretend that rock over there is your prey."

Hazelpaw tried to do the hunter's crouch, but like always, her hind paws were off balance; she twisted in the air, trying to correct her awkward jump, but landed a fox-length short of the stone.

"Try again, Hazelpaw," Redstar meowed, but Crimsonpaw and Scarletpaw were already mimicking her clumsy spring. "Crimsonpaw, Scarletpaw, stop that right now." His kits scrambled to their paws.

Hazelpaw crouched again, her paws closer to the correct place than before but still awkwardly positioned. This time she crashed down on the rock--a little noisy, but if the rock had been a vole, she would have caught it.

Carminepaw and Cerisepaw took off again--this time Carminepaw was chasing Cerisepaw. Stormwind and Nettleclaw groaned and took off after their apprentices, their pelts catching on bramble bushes. Crimsonpaw and Scarletpaw replayed their awkward interpretations of Hazelpaw's first leap. Hazelpaw watched them, whiskers twitching wildly in amusement. Pineshadow's thin, delicate whiskers twitched, too. Moonwhisker tried to get Scarletpaw to concentrate, but to no avail. Cloudshadow regarded Redstar carefully, as if he were afraid to speak to his apprentice.

Redstar knew it would only get worse. Worse--unless he was able to stop it. I can't imagine what SkyClan apprentices are like!

It was Redstar's job to keep his Clan from destroying itself. The question was, could he help his Clanmates--or not? (ha ha Redstar if only you knew you were supposed to be pathetic and unlikable)

Oh, StarClan, help me stop this chaos!

CHAPTER NINE

"Redstar," spat an angry she-cat's voice, "I have to talk to you."

"Come on in," he meowed. He couldn't sleep. I wonder who it is...

Moonwhisker stalked into the den. "We have to talk about the kits."

"My kits or the SkyClan ones?" Redstar muttered.

"Both."

"And... why?" Redstar did not want to talk about Cloudstar's kits. Especially Skykit.

"Your kits are hopeless at learning--because of you."

"What?" Redstar sprang to his paws, energized. "How dare you accuse me of teaching my kits not to learn?"

"I'm not saying that," Moonwhisker tried to say. (well, you kind of did, but I get you)

"I know perfectly well what you're saying. You don't think my kits are capable of learning--because you don't think I'm capable of teaching them. Now go away. You're dismissed."

Moonwhisker stood there, her tail lashing furiously. "You're supposed to lead us," she spat, "but I think you'd rather play with your kits. Go ahead then, train Scarletpaw yourself. See if I care when ThunderClan is destroyed because you're too selfish to let another warrior train your kits!"

Redstar would have scratched her if the warrior code allowed him, but he struggled to keep his temper under control. "I am not selfish," he growled, "I want the best for my kits. Stormwind is the only mentor showing any intelligence that I've seen. (nice) When Crimsonpaw did the crouch wrong, Cloudshadow didn't stop him. When Stormwind and I tried to remind Carminepaw and Cerisepaw that they were warrior apprentices, where were you? Teaching Scarletpaw? No. You were talking to her, telling her to be flat." (what do you think teaching is)

"I told her to keep her tail low when she did the hunter's crouch," Moonwhisker hissed, her lemon-yellow eyes blazing in the faint moonlight. "You told the kits StarClan didn't want more medicine cats. Why? You won't even tell us which cat told you. No, let me guess, Cloudstar came and said, 'None of the kits can me medicine cats because StarClan is terrible.' Then you took it to mean all eight and I don't care whether I'm wrong!" (me medicine cats)

"So why are you saying this? You know it's a lie!" Redstar knew he sounded ridiculous, but so did Moonwhisker. Moonwhisker didn't even have a point, did she?

"I quit!" she hissed. "I won't mentor Scarletpaw any longer!"

"You've only been her mentor one day! What, you can't handle a leader's kit, only the kits of other warriors?"

"So you're saying Goldensong and Duskstorm are bad warriors--just because I mentored them."

"No, I'm not." Redstar had had enough. "Moonwhisker, go away and leave me in peace. You don't have to mentor Scarletpaw if it's too much responsibility for a warrior like you. Don't glare at me like that, I know you have a lot to do. Now leave me alone. Tomorrow I'll tell Duskstorm that he can mentor Scarletpaw. And don't look at me that way!"

"You just said he was a bad warrior," Moonwhisker hissed, "since I mentored him." She glared at him intensely, then whipped around and stalked away, her whiskers quivering with rage. (you tried, Moonwhisker)

I'm not selfish! ...Am I?

"Oh, StarClan, what have I done?" Redstar murmured in horror. "Moonwhisker, I'm sorry, I lost my temper!"

Redstar gazed after her, but the silver warrior didn't look back. (why would she you're barely a leader)

Smokepaw's Journey

SPOILER: Click to show

Okay, so I started this a very long time ago--I'm guessing 2008. Some pages are missing--for example, page one. What happened was that I decided to write "Smokepaw's Journey" about the ShadowClan apprentice who falls off the cliff in Dawn. Smokefoot is confirmed to be a different cat, but I don't buy that that was anything other than them covering up their mistake. However, shortly after starting this, I heard that another fan had submitted a fanfiction called Smokepaw's Journey to Vicky. I ~~cried~~ gave up on mine.

Page one: Smokepaw is falling, but an eagle catches him.

Smokepaw's thoughts: It's flying low. Now's my chance.
Smokepaw's thoughts: Oh, no. Oh, no. I'm going to fall and die…
thick letters: CRRRACKKKK!
Smokepaw's thoughts: Ow, it hurts! It hurts!
Smokepaw's thoughts: I see the Clans… They're so far away.

More pages are missing here! He wanders a little while limping, and it's canon that he sees Silverstream of all cats in StarClan dreams.

Smokepaw's thoughts: I can't believe it.
Tigerstar: I am Tigerstar. These are Brokenstar, Hawkfrost… Darkstripe, Jaggedtooth, and Boulder.
Silverstream: ?
Silverstream's thoughts: NO! Got to stop him… get him…

Silverstream's thoughts: No…
Boulder: It's okay, Silverstream… I know, and I'll stop him.
Silverstream: But--
?: RiverClan spy! Back again?

?: It was better when he was with ShadowClan-StarClan cats.
Tigerstar: I'm here because I tried to take over the forest.
Tigerstar: But a cat called Scourge killed me.
Tigerstar: Jaggedtooth, Boulder, and Darkstripe helped me. Hawkfrost tried to follow in my footsteps.
Tigerstar: Brokenstar killed kits.

Genderqueer

tiger beetle

Warrior Fanatic

=^ò.ó^=

Pronouns: all (default they)

other old fanfictions update 7/4 Jun 15, 2017 21:12:17 GMT -5 wadevvilson likes this

Quote

Post by tiger beetle on Jun 15, 2017 21:12:17 GMT -5

the Rainingwinds universe (from memory)

SPOILER: Click to show

I liked ants, so the groups of cats were called colonies. Rainingwinds was the main one, there was some other one whose name I can’t remember, and the BloodClan stand-in was called Kitlap. As in lapping up kits’ blood, but that doesn’t make the name any better, just edgier.

I don’t remember any cats from Kitlap, although chances are they were edgy.

For Rainingwinds cats, I used almost exclusively names that came from the Warriors site “find your warrior name” thing. The prefix (and most suffixes) determined something about the cat’s appearance, and I don’t mean that they just had to be reasonable—it was basically a chart. It wasn't 100% required, but…I stuck to it pretty well.

Because I used the official site's generator, there were some strange names in there. Keep in mind that for the hometown (suffix) field, T was -head, …X? was -wish, Y was -stalker, and Z was -sayer.

A few things I remember:

Tangle-: orange, usually with brown stripes
Swift-: tuxedo
Claw-: brown pointed (Siamese)
Wild-: white with black swirls
Hawk-: rusty with a black tinge to ears/forehead/back/tail

(there were also obvious things like Red- and Blue- matching to orange and gray respectively, but that's not strange)

-claw: brown pointed (could be overwritten by a prefix if the prefix was on the chart)
-sayer: almost always tabby stripes
-wish: white flash on the side
-foot: gray paws
-talon: sometimes meant a single thick stripe, depending on the prefix
-fire: weird black tufts, but of course it was only used for cats with some type of orange

That was definitely not all, but it was kind of weird.

Also, it worked a little like the Tribe, where cats chose a “path” in life and followed it. There were hunters, guards/fighters, kit-carers, and healers for sure, and I feel like there was a fifth path (ignoring leader). Changing paths was looked down on in their society but not unheard of. Each “path” had its own leader. The kit-carers didn’t have an official leader, but they had an unofficial one, which was basically decided by seniority while the real leaders were based on skill. (Part of the whole thing with kit-carers was that they kind of opted out of doing their original path once they were fully grown; i.e. they "left" their path in the way that Ferncloud did.)

Suffixes were given when cats were very young and could only be changed for a special occasion (it would be like renaming someone –pool for discovering the Moonpool, although I don’t think they had anything like the Moonpool anyway).

Cats with –sayer were in the running to become leader, but they also had to follow another path in case they didn’t win. (Not all tabbies were named -sayer. All five of the cats in the competition in the story were tabbies, but someone named Swiftsayer, for example, could exist but would not be a tabby.)

Rainsayer was the leader. I can’t remember whether Rain- was because he was the first leader, because every leader became Rainsayer (like Stoneteller), or because Totally a Coincidence that Rainsayer Leads Rainingwinds. I’m pretty sure he was a regular gray tabby?

Bluesayer was the “main character” of a story that never got written. I don’t remember her personality, but I do remember that I thought she was cool. She was a gray cat with orange stripes and orange eyes. Second-grade me thought that was completely plausible.

Clawstalker was Bluesayer’s best friend, a very nimble, skittish green-eyed Siamese. He was in training to become a hunter.

Redsayer was the Draco Malfoy of the story, and he relentlessly bullied Clawstalker. At one point, there was a scene where Redsayer chased Clawstalker up a tree and followed him through the branches, but because Redsayer was so much heavier than Clawstalker, he fell out of the tree and got very hurt.

A big orange fighter cat named Tanglestep was the real villain. I think his villainous plot was to sabotage the -sayers besides Redsayer and then rule by proxy through Redsayer, who he was controlling.

A quick edit: I initially mixed up Tigerstep with Tangleclaw. They were quite similar in appearance. However, Tangleclaw was the leader of the fighters. He was a big buff orange cat with brown stripes. Tigerstep had thicker stripes, and I believe Tigerstep had yellow eyes while Tangleclaw had green.

Tigerstep=evil; Tangleclaw=good guy.

There was also Scarclaw, who was like the Darkstripe to Tanglestep's Tigerstar. Minus the accidental TigerxDark subtext, except also probably with their own subtext. I think Scarclaw was a hunter. He was definitely supposed to be pathetic.

Silentsayer was a gray cat with brown stripes and brown eyes who, of course, did not (and, it was assumed, could not) speak. She was chosen as Rainsayer’s successor, but he didn’t die within the story.

There were two brown tabbies, a female one named Thornsayer and a dark male one named Bramblesayer. I don't remember anything else about them.

Yeah, for some reason all five –sayers were about the same age, and this wasn’t explained as “well, this was the time when they were like, ‘we need a successor!’” although I guess that could handwave it. But yeah, it was just coincidence back then.

Clawclaw was ~~the leader~~ (correction: ranked second) of the fighters. He basically looked just like Clawstalker but with more muscle. I think he was Clawstalker's dad. Clawclaw was kind of a Sue, but whatever. He was pretty cool.

Swiftfoot was a strong tuxedo cat with gray (specifically “cool gray” because that was the colored pencil I used) feet and…green eyes? She was the main character of a different story, of which about one page got written. I feel like she was supposed to be the strongest cat in Rainingwinds, which strongly implies she lived in a different time period from the rest of them because Tangleclaw was also the strongest cat in Rainingwinds.

Runninglegs was Swiftfoot’s best friend (I don’t think they were officially mates, but they kind of might as well have been). He was a thin, lanky tan tom with green eyes. He wasn’t as cool as Swiftfoot.

Swiftclaw and Swifttalon…I think they were brothers, maybe just close friends. They were both tuxedo cats, and I might have this backward, but I think Swiftclaw was brave and training to be a fighter, and Swifttalon was very nervous and originally trained as a hunter until he couldn’t bear to climb another tree (or was climber a separate path?) and became a healer.

Brighteyes was a black she-cat with golden eyes, the senior kit-carer.

Petalwish was a former fulfiller of a prophecy. I think she was pale cream with blue eyes; she definitely had a white flash on her side.

Petalwish’s son, Cometwish, was a future prophecy cat; they could tell that because he also had the white flash on his side. However, he was reddish orange with green eyes.

At one point I was trying to make a prophecy for every single cat in the colony, but I gave up and changed it so that only -wish cats--but all -wish cats--had prophecies about them.

Definitely way more characters than that. Rainingwinds was huge. But I don't remember them.

Rainingwinds universe update 7/4 based on papers I found

SPOILER: Click to show

Here's a list of the paths (it doesn't officially call them "paths" but that's as good a word as any:
Wingstill - kit care (as in they metaphorically kept the kits protected under their wings)
Apprentices - might be leader, every subject (I changed everything else and I let the apprentices stay Apprentices what)
Strona - fighters (I REMEMBER STRONA! Strona was a typo of "strong" so Strona cats = strong cats = fighters)
Keepers - (water damage) + plans, some cats learn (keepers???)
Birdflight - spies, messengers (I guess this is the tree cats I was remembering)
Huitsmnoti - support, defense (how did I even get the idea to create that sequence of letters)
Mousetail - hunters (just call things what they are we didn't need these names for things)
Healers - herb users, heal (you don't say)

There also appears to be some form of allegiances here, but it looks like…a web. You know, where you put one circle in the middle with the main idea, then circles attached to that one with smaller ideas, then circles attached to those with specific facts?

There's a tan circle at the top that says RS (Rainsayer). I'm going to go counterclockwise through all the pieces coming off of that.

First up is mauve, for Apprentices. There is no main mauve circle; all the circles are given equal importance, and none are solid mauve. Now, these cats are listed only as their initials, but fortunately I know who they are! Redsayer, Bluesayer, Silentsayer, Thornsayer, and Bramblesayer.

Next is green, for Strona. The first green circle is filled in and says Tangleclaw, and the other circles are empty with prefixes in them. They say Claw, Fire, Rust, Tiger, Spots, Thistle, and Brush. No other cats' suffixes are listed. My guess is that it's generally expected that they'll have -claw but not unheard of to have others (I'd never lock myself in that much).

There are further lines coming out of the green circles. These extra lines all meet at one point, and then there are more lines connected to more empty green circles. These circles are labeled Tail, Fuzz, Mango, Pompom, and Swift. My guess is that these were Strona Apprentices.

Next is bright pink, for Birdflight. The solid pink circle is labeled Swiftfoot. This may explain why I remembered Swiftfoot and Tangleclaw separately as being the strongest cats in Rainingwinds: Swiftfoot's strength was athletic in nature, while Tangleclaw was built for battle. The empty circles connected to this circle are labeled Mark, Furled Leaves, and Leaf.

Next is dark blue, for Mousetail. This is difficult to read. The solid dark blue circle is labeled Hawktalon. The main set of Mousetail circles are labeled Sharp, Schist, Puffy, Slate, Stone, Talon, Swallowtail, and Scar. The Mousetail Apprentices are labeled Shining Pelt, Tabby, White, Wisp, Wild, and Wolf.

Next is red, for Wingstill. The solid red circle is labeled Petalheart. The other circles are labeled Star and Light, and apparently Wingstill was something you could train for (or maybe I'm misreading what the crossing lines mean), because after the crossed lines there are circles labeled Mink and Bright.

Next is gray, for Huitsmnoti. The solid gray circle is named Runninglegs. The main ones are labeled Autumn, Stream, Petal, and Rose. The Huitsmnoti Apprentice circles are labeled Bright Eyes, Snapdragon, and Clover.

Next is black, for Healers. Unfortunately they are only labeled as N and K. I have no idea what those stand for.

I also have pictures of the cats. I'll do my best to tell you who's who.

So the gray cat with red marks in the big circle is obviously Rainsayer.

Wingstill (red):
The gray, black, and white cat in the red circle closest to Rainsayer is Petalheart. The yellow cat has to be Star-, and the cream one has to be Light-. Past the crossed lines, the orange one would be Bright-, and the long brown one would be Mink-.

Apprentices (mauve):
Three are easy to get. The orange one with red stripes is Redsayer. The gray one with red stripes (right below Redsayer) is Bluesayer. The gray-brown one with red stripes (on the left) is Silentsayer. My guess is that the brown one with red stripes (next to Silentsayer) is Thornsayer and the mauve one with red stripes (who wouldn't officially have been mauve but definitely is in this drawing) is Bramblesayer, but I could have those two backward; they were nobodies.

Healers (black):
Well, the black and white one is the one labeled N, and the mottled tan one is the one labeled K. Still don't know their names or anything.

Birdflight (pink):
Of course the one in the circle closest to Rainsayer is Swiftfoot. Then I don't know which one is Mark, which one is Furled Leaves, and which one is Leaf, but I'd guess they're in order. Past the crossed lines, the grayish one would be Pebble-, and the dark one would be Snarl-.

Strona (green):
The light orange one at the top is Tangleclaw. Across the line of seven, in order, that's Clawclaw, Fire-, Rust-, Tiger-, Spots-, Thistle-, and Brush-. Then from top to bottom, past the crossed lines, that's Tail, Fuzz, Mango, Pompom, and Swift.

Huitsmnoti (gray):
The top one is Runninglegs. He…looks fat, which is pretty strange considering everyone else looks thin, and Runninglegs was actually supposed to be thin. Anyway, lower down the circles aren't in a line. My best guess is that the red one above the others is Rose-, the tan one is Autumn-, the orange one is Petal-, and the purplish one is Stream-. Down lower, the red one that doesn't even have a face is Snapdragon-, the gray one is Clover-, and the black one is Bright Eyes.

Mousetail (blue):
The one in the main circle is Hawktalon, who apparently has a different design from the Calicopelt Hawktalon. I'm guessing they actually are in order--I can tell you with absolute certainty that the yellow-and-black mess is Swallowtail- and the seal point on the right is Scarclaw. (Scarclaw's presence in Mousetail confirms for certain that cats are NOT required to share a prefix with others on their path.) Assuming they are in order, then the peachy orange one is Sharp, the tan one whose tail is in the circle is Schist-, the tan one with a closeup on their face is Puffy-, the purplish and gray one is Slate-, the gray one is Stone, and the purplish one is Talon-…which all seems to check out!

That thing in the bottom right is an olive.

Swiftfoot and Swiftclaw--I guess she's training him. The picture is labeled DJ because putting that your first name started with D and your hometown started with J into the official Warriors site name generator would yield the name Swiftfoot.

Victory in Death (document "VICTORY IN DEATH" created 7/8/2012, last modified 7/8/2012)

SPOILER: Click to show

VICTORY IN DEATH

This story takes place in the River territory; five littermates came across SkyClan and each created their own Clan in its honor. In the past in the River territory it was common for a strong warrior from each side of the battle to come forward when it seemed lives were being wasted, and these two warriors would usually fight to the death. (at least I didn't use the same dramatic intro? but also that's not a good way to do battles guys)

***

“Cats of RainClan!” Leopardstar yowled from the Highperch. The Clan, already gathered, looked expectantly up at the mottled brown tom. “I trust many of you—Silverpaw especially—have already guessed why I called you together.” (what's with these Silverpaws)

Silverpaw, one of the Clan’s newest apprentices, glanced up fearfully. She was white, with gray tabby patches and terrified blue eyes. Only eight days before, while she was still a kit, Silverpaw had gone with her brother and sisters into SleetClan territory. A SleetClan warrior had attacked first, before asking questions, scarring the kit’s face permanently. One of her sisters, Gingerpaw, bore faint scars across her muzzle as well. SleetClan had also been getting less and less respectful of RainClan’s border for moons and the Clan was fed up. (seriously with every old fanfiction I read I get more horrified--I thought I always understood commas)

“SleetClan!” howled Cricketleap, the apprentices’ mother. “SleetClan are not worthy of the name of warrior!”

Leopardstar dipped his head. “This does indeed relate to SleetClan.” His copper eyes gleamed. “You see, at the last Gathering, SleetClan complained strongly of SnowClan. Evidently SnowClan has branched out a bit, and their raids are continuing.” (everyone should already know this)

“In newleaf?” Nightsplash asked, looking worried. “I thought they kept their raids to leaf-bare.” (this is not how to do exposition shut up)

“This year they have not stopped. Apparently SleetClan’s prey is more plentiful than ever this newleaf, and SnowClan can’t resist it.” (you basically already said all of this)

“So what do you suggest?” Robinflight asked. A black-spotted she-cat, she was identical to her sister Nightsplash. (a black-and-white cat…named Robin-?)

“Glad you asked.” Leopardstar smirked. “Remember how I ever-so-politely confronted Mossstar about his warrior attacking the kits? How I said our alliance could continue?”

“We’re attacking SnowClan, then?” the deputy asked, craning her neck to look up at Leopardstar. Robinflight’s green eyes flickered in confusion. “With SleetClan?”

“Close.” Leopardstar purred thoughtfully for a moment. “A bit of trickery never went amiss with me.” Like all RainClan cats, he prided himself on wit and cunning. He furrowed his brow. “I’ve thought it through, and I think I have an answer. Here’s the plan…” (that's a bad way to write this sort of thing)

***

“Leopardstar?” Mossstar blinked in surprise. “I didn’t expect to see you again so soon.”

“Yes, well, I’ve been considering what you said at the Gathering.”

“About what? Our apology? Look, Leopardstar, I’ve already given you a squirrel for that little…mishap. Leafheart has been punished for breaking the code, and I apologized a thousand times. Isn’t that enough?” (Mossstar is a whiny little thing…not sure how he became leader)

“Oh, oh, not that at all!” Leopardstar dipped his head. “No, you’ve repaid it perfectly.” His eyes glittered. “I’ve come to discuss SnowClan. HailClan and GraupelClan need not know of our continued…alliance…they will realize how things stand between us shortly enough.” He kept his tone respectful, though he had to repress a surge of rage that surprised him.

“SnowClan,” Mossstar repeated coolly, but Leopardstar caught a flash of interest from the tom’s blue eyes.

“Yes. SnowClan has been extraordinarily disrespectful of borders and of the warrior code, more than is natural even for such cowardly kittypets as Goldenstar. I wish to attack them in six days. Bring your whole fighting force with you.”

Mossstar’s ear twitched. “My dear friend, I sense anger. How am I to trust you will not send your warriors to attack my unprotected camp?”

“I respect your caution. It is good to protect your Clan, and I admit this must seem a bit dangerous. True. I promise I will not launch an attack on an unguarded camp; however, if it makes you feel better, you may leave a guard. (what good is a guard going to do? if Mossstar weren't incompetent this would never work) But remember that SnowClan are wily fighters and the cats we’ve seen at the Gatherings can’t be nearly the whole Clan.”

Mossstar narrowed his blue eyes and surveyed Leopardstar’s spotted face. (shut up about his spots) “Very well, then. Six days, at first halfsun.” First halfsun was halfway between sunrise and sunhigh—second halfsun was between sunhigh and sunset. (there's no need for this)

“Six days, at first halfsun,” Leopardstar agreed.

***

“Are you there, Mossstar?” Leopardstar hissed. He could see the black-and-white tom, of course—SleetClan always had trouble hiding in the forest—but he wasn’t certain Mossstar could see him.

Mossstar’s fur bushed out. Then he relaxed. “Oh, it’s just you, Leopardstar.”

The six warriors behind Leopardstar padded forward. “Let’s go,” the deputy, Robinflight, said.

Leopardstar slid gracefully into the river. Mossstar followed warily, and Leopardstar showed him how to paddle across, though the SleetClan cats weren’t nearly as adept in the water as were RainClan. (you can't just teach someone to swim across a river if they've never been in the water…like a little pond, probably, sure, but not a river, and this is supposed to be a pretty decent-sized river, too)

Leopardstar pulled himself onto the riverbank on SnowClan’s side; they were directly across from SleetClan territory now.

One false move and my whole patrol is dead, Leopardstar thought, then chastised himself for having the thought. Mouse-brain! You can’t think like that! RainClan will win as usual. (just drown the guys)

“I’ll go on ahead,” he offered. Robinflight and Nightsplash grinned; Mossstar nodded. (wouldn't SleetClan get suspicious at their grins)

“Okay, we’ll follow you. You—uh—do know where the camp is, right?”

“Sure,” Leopardstar lied. It couldn’t be that hard to find; after all, any SnowClan scent trail—as long and winding as it might be—would lead to the camp.

Leopardstar slunk out of the others’ sight, through the bushes. He picked up his pace once away from SleetClan and followed the first scent trail he came to. Eventually he heard voices ahead. That was easy. (wow, convenient)

Leopardstar sprang into the camp. “Goldenstar! I must speak to you!”

SnowClan warriors leered at him. A tuxedo tomcat spat, “You don’t speak to Goldenstar, you get your throat sliced by Goldenstar!” (this is not good PR)

The ginger tabby appeared by the tuxedo cat’s side. “Now, now, Crowfang, don’t want to scare off RainClan.” His blue eyes glinted as he raised his gaze to rest on Leopardstar. “Let’s at least hear what he has to say before we decide how to deal with him.”

“Mossstar!” Leopardstar howled at the top of his lungs. Dropping to a whisper, he added to Goldenstar, “I’ve lured most of SleetClan here along with a patrol of my warriors. Once they get here my cats will turn on SleetClan instead of attacking you as Mossstar expects.”

Goldenstar gave the spotted tabby an appraising look, then nodded. “Fair enough. You may live.” He snarled unpleasantly. “For now.” (also bad PR???)

Leopardstar dipped his head to the tabby tom. “Thank you.”

Mossstar burst into the camp with SleetClan warriors trailing behind. “There you are, Leopardstar!”

Leopardstar stepped back, leaping out of the way as his patrol dashed sideways through Mossstar’s forces, scattering them. (just delete "sideways" and it isn't that bad of a sentence) Nightsplash and Robinflight turned to fight the SleetClan warriors, but the other four scampered up to stand beside Leopardstar on top of a boulder. (wouldn't someone notice) In the distance, he spotted three cats clambering through the treetops; his backup ambush warriors would arrive soon enough.

Leopardstar and the others watched the battle below. Nightsplash and Robinflight fought in unison; the sisters were using RainClan strategies to keep their opponents hopping backward. (RainClan strategies? you mean fighting in the WATER???) RainClan tactics were of course designed for fighting in the river, where backing up meant floundering in the current, but they were effective as well on land, where the SleetClan cats were not only outnumbered but outmaneuvered. (no, strategies that specifically rely on you being fine in the water while your opponent has to concentrate on swimming do not translate flawlessly to land, and RainClan is not magically better than the other Clans)

“And SleetClan’s supposed to have common sense!” Leopardstar scoffed.

Mossstar and Goldenstar bristled, facing each other and growling. Leopardstar had never realized how similar the rival leaders were in size and build. A dreadful thought occurred to him as he realized the leaders were conversing rather than threatening, and he felt as if he’d swallowed a stone. (this is ridiculous; if it were at all plausible that you could see this, you would have noticed it at a Gathering, and as far as them talking, what did you expect would happen when you set two Clans to fighting and then sat and watched them from a boulder in plain sight) He wished the backup plan were more reliable. (you should have just gotten out of there and let them figure it out on their own) How could he trust either of these cats? Goldenstar was untrustworthy simply from being in SnowClan, and Leopardstar had lied to Mossstar about this very battle. (okay so it was a bad idea…everyone knew that except you Leopardstar)

Leopardstar leaned forward to catch what the two leaders were saying. (no he didn't there's no way leaning forward from that boulder makes a difference)

“…cannot do this,” Goldenstar finished. (wow look at how clearly he can hear now when before he couldn't hear a word!)

“I cannot either.” Mossstar flattened his ears. “I cannot kill you, brother.” (quelle surprise)

“Let us unite now against these traitors who have pitted us against each other,” Goldenstar suggested. (that's not how you talk stop it)

“Once we’re finished, we can both take part of his territory,” Mossstar said with a nod. “Then we will be satisfied and we can stop trespassing on one another’s land.” (stop expositing in the middle of a battle!)

Leopardstar let out a roar of hatred. “Brothers!” (what kind of RainClan leader are you!? obviously not every RainClan cat will be clever, but you'd think they'd prioritize that in a leader!)

The two froze, then turned toward him.

“Yes…” Goldenstar hissed. “Brothers…and we are tired of fighting.”

“Tired of dying for your entertainment,” Mossstar agreed.

“Entertainment?” Leopardstar spat. “Entertainment? SleetClan is trespassing constantly! SleetClan scored their dirty claws across two kits’ faces!”

“SnowClan!” Goldenstar shouted above the screeches of the battle. Suddenly it went quiet. (SleetClan warriors didn't continue attacking the distracted SnowClan cats? they don't know what's going on) Nightsplash and Robinflight scampered away to the edges of the camp, dark blood staining the white parts of their pelts. The stink of blood was everywhere, and some SnowClan and SleetClan warriors lay dead. Leopardstar hoped his warriors hadn’t killed them. (I know this means because that would get RainClan in more trouble--but would it!? the answer is no, it wouldn't)

“RainClan are the enemy,” said Mossstar. “This is some sort of sick game Leopardstar is playing. He expects us to roll over at his feet just because he puts fancy words to everything. He expects us to die for him. He wants to ruin us.”

“I want to ruin you?” Leopardstar boiled in rage. (impressive) “I want to ruin you now? Do I? Or are you the ones—”

He dove aside, breaking off midsentence, as Goldenstar lunged for his throat. Mossstar was about to pounce now.

“Wait,” he snarled. “I will fight the two of you. But you must promise me something.”

“What?” Mossstar growled. “That we’ll never fight your Clan again? That we’ll do whatever your pathetic foxhearts want?”

“No, not exactly.” Leopardstar glared into the tom’s blue eyes, unafraid to meet his gaze. “If I die, you will let my warriors return home unharmed. You will not kill them or even hurt them—at least no more than they already are hurt. You will not dishonor the code.”

Goldenstar lifted his muzzle in thought. Finally he said, slowly, “I don’t see how that could hurt. As long as your warriors are peaceful, we will not fight them.” (okay again, Mossstar's not supposed to be very smart, but also again, how did he become leader? these guys have the maturity and wisdom of apprentices)

Mossstar nodded.

Leopardstar bared his teeth. He hoped this plan was reliable enough, wishing again that he didn’t have to fight the two. I was supposed to wait and then attack the winner! he thought. I was supposed to have my strong, fresh warriors fight weakened victors, not get locked in a battle to the death against two others! (okay well you did a bad job of that) He swallowed his fear and stepped forward the same brazen warrior he’d always considered himself. (that's a bad way of putting that) Victory for his Clan was more important than a single life—or even nine. He was ready to die over and over for RainClan.

If only death could come quickly. But no, he would have to suffer nine deaths before his Clan could return home freely.

“I order all of my warriors to stay put,” he barked. “This is an honorable battle, a battle which upholds the standards of our warrior ancestors. I want to have no help.”

“Honor,” sniffed Goldenstar. “What is honor to me? SnowClan has been reputed to have none.” (if the SnowClan camp is so easy to find, then someone would have come for revenge before now)

“Hold your tongue,” Mossstar meowed. “You have honor, all right; certainly more than this RainClan liar, and he speaks so well of it.” (highly)

Goldenstar gave it some thought. “Okay. I want no help from my warriors, either.”

Mossstar bared his teeth. “Then it’s on!” He sprang at Leopardstar, who rose to meet him. Leopardstar writhed and flung the spotted tom over his shoulder, then darted away. Goldenstar lashed out and the tabby leapt over his paws, crashing down claws-first onto the ginger tom’s shoulders and forcing his head down. (I have written exactly zero good fight scenes in my life, so this is going to be Fun)

Hind claws digging into the ground, Leopardstar pushed down with all his might on the tom before him. Goldenstar’s head snapped upward, but he was being shoved closer and closer to the ground. Leopardstar let out a cry of surprise and pain as someone hooked a paw around his hind leg and yanked him off balance: he had forgotten Mossstar. (okay so I know no one has died yet but we're back to the tissue paper with claws problem)

“Cheater!” the SleetClan leader yowled, raking thorn-sharp claws across Leopardstar’s muzzle. Leopardstar shook his head fiercely, his muzzle knocking into the enemy’s paw and pushing it away.

“You do not kill my brother,” Goldenstar hissed from Leopardstar’s left. He wrapped his paws tightly around Leopardstar’s throat, claws digging through his soft fur. Leopardstar writhed, his hind paw catching in the SnowClan leader’s throat and tearing it as Goldenstar’s tight grip made his vision foggy. Leopardstar kicked again but to no avail: he was dying. The pain was intense and he felt himself go limp. (commas? what are those)

His second life arrived, along with Goldenstar’s fifth—for Goldenstar had lost some lives already. Mossstar looked frightened and very uncertain, and Leopardstar, feeling he had no choice in such a battle as this one, lunged forward and bit as hard as he could. Blood, disgusting blood, filled his mouth and trickled down his face as Mossstar lost his seventh life—the tom had not spent his lives carefully. ("disgusting blood" how have you made it this far as the RainClan leader especially when you're going to pull stuff like this? you don't have to like the taste, but you're coming across as squeamish, which you should not be considering who you are)

Goldenstar spat with hatred and leapt again, using the same choke move that had succeeded before. Leopardstar dodged, but Mossstar, who had woken up already, drove his claws into the brown tom’s throat and he lost his second life.

His third life passed quickly too, but he managed to bring Mossstar with him, and he knew this was Mossstar’s last life. Goldenstar seemed to realize this too, as he suddenly started shielding his brother from Leopardstar’s attacks. (why doesn't Mossstar back off a little)

“Two against one,” Goldenstar hissed. “Give up or you’ll die.”

“Everyone dies eventually,” Leopardstar snarled. “RainClan never gives up.”

He made another mighty lunge and Goldenstar fell at his paws. Mossstar turned and raced away, out of the camp; his mate Blackmoon pounced at Leopardstar’s throat. (in my defense Blackmoon was not initially my name! however, my sister did not know I was writing a story, so I had infinite freedom to change her name, and I didn't, so…)

She clung tightly to his throat, and he pulled away. It lasted only a split second, but in that moment Leopardstar felt a million years pass. Why was he so light-headed? Why was he staring at the black warrior? Why did she have so much fur and blood and skin in her jaws? Why was blood pouring all over his chest? Why was there so much pain? These thoughts came all at once, and suddenly he was dead a fourth time.

Waking up, he backed away from the she-cat and snarled. “You were not to intervene!”

“Mossstar promised nothing,” she reminded him with a fierce glint in her eyes. “You and Goldenstar vowed to battle without help, but Mossstar knew you would not notice as long as he went along with it.” (wow, clever)

“Stand down, Blackmoon,” Goldenstar said consolingly. “Your Clan still has scraps of its honor left, even if Mossstar was a coward and you assisted in our fight. (what do you care about honor you literally said "SnowClan has been reputed to have none" like ten minutes ago) Against all odds Leopardstar has—”

Cutting off, he whirled. Leopardstar was ready to leap out of the way; but suddenly he realized he was lying on the ground! Why wasn’t he standing? He was sure he had been standing a moment before—and then an image of his own throat in Blackmoon’s jaws appeared, and Leopardstar remembered that he had just died, and must have therefore collapsed and not even realized it. (what was I even doing in this paragraph)

“This is your sixth life, isn’t it?” Goldenstar whispered hoarsely. “We have killed you five times already.” (thanks for that helpful recap Goldenstar)

“And it is yours as well.” Leopardstar narrowed his eyes. “Face me as the leader you are, and I will face you with courage.” (honestly why aren't SnowClan and SleetClan piling onto Leopardstar and the, what, six warriors he brought? two Clans vs. seven cats? like, not that that's an "honorable" thing to do, but neither was Leopardstar's whole plot)

Goldenstar licked his lips. “I look forward to it.” He leapt again, and Leopardstar fell at his paws. (look he fell at his paws isn't that so clever!!!)

Leopardstar opened his eyes to find Goldenstar standing over him, and kicked out at the SnowClan leader. Goldenstar bent down and buried his teeth in Leopardstar’s throat, and Leopardstar reacted instinctively, pulling Goldenstar closer and biting at his throat as well.

He woke up shortly and pulled away from where Goldenstar lay, certain the tom would wake up at any moment.

Goldenstar opened his eyes but didn’t stand up; he shifted on his paws and leered tauntingly at the RainClan leader. “This is my seventh life; but it is your eighth, is it not?”

Leopardstar glared coldly down at the crouching cat. “A difference of one life is pitifully small but terribly great,” he muttered. (that's not a good line, past me, shut up) Goldenstar rose slowly and Leopardstar launched himself forward; but the tabby met him and they locked their paws onto each other’s shoulders, each shoving as hard as he could and each refusing to budge.

In one fluid movement Leopardstar flung himself down and backward, at the same time as Goldenstar lunged forward. He toppled to the ground, catching Leopardstar’s hind paw and latching on.

“Get off my paw!” Leopardstar screeched. (okay I get that it hurts but you just felt worse pain like six times in a row in the past ten minutes didn't you) He kicked fiercely, shaking off Goldenstar’s paw and sending him reeling.

Suddenly Goldenstar was at his throat again, and Leopardstar knew he could no more get away than fly. Instead he clawed furiously at the ginger throat, paddling rapidly at the rough fur as his world slowed down.

He blinked open his eyes again, the fog clearing away. This was Goldenstar’s eighth life—he sprang at the still-dead cat and began snapping at its neck. Goldenstar’s eyes briefly flared with life, but the gleam faded again.

“Step away,” a SnowClan warrior commanded; “to kill him three times like that would be such a shameful thing to do…”

“Then I suppose this shame evens out the dishonor that has been created in this fight,” Leopardstar meowed.

Goldenstar rolled onto his paws again. “So here we are. Each of us with one life to lose. I’m surprised at your tenacity; more impressive cats have fallen much quicker than you, and you are clearly much cleverer than you look to have survived thus far.”

“I suppose that was meant to be a compliment?” Leopardstar growled. “Because I’m not so sure it was.” (no really)

Goldenstar reared onto his hind paws again, crashing down on Leopardstar’s shoulders. Leopardstar braced against the tom’s attack and Goldenstar’s paws rose just long enough that he was able to flip over. When Goldenstar came down to claw at his underbelly, Leopardstar was ready. He dug his claws deep into the soft, pale fur on Goldenstar’s underbelly as the claws slashed into his. The point was blood…the point was blood…he clawed with all his might and felt something deep in Goldenstar’s belly tear as his world darkened. (how many different ways could I find to say "then Leopardstar died")

“Why aren’t you dead?” The voice was hardly more than a breath as Leopardstar opened his eyes again. Goldenstar lay on the camp floor, blood spilling from his underbelly. “You died nine times.”

“No,” Leopardstar meowed. “A difference of one life is pitifully small but terribly great.” (why did I think this was a good line) He dipped his head respectfully. “When I lay on the ground after having had my throat torn out, I realized the only way to make the fight even was to fake a single death.” (wait I distinctly remember him saying he rolled over at Goldenstar's paws like he had asked? did I forget to write that part???)

Goldenstar’s eyes widened in horror and the life faded from them.

“Come, RainClan.” Gaze dark with sorrow, Leopardstar padded from the SnowClan camp. “We have won.” (and everyone actually lets them go instead of just killing the seven cats and denying the duel had ever happened)

the third grade game

SPOILER: Click to show

So in third grade, I had a couple friends who were sort of a little bit into Warriors. I made up "my own" universe that was basically just the Clans but with slightly different names. There was an equivalent continuity where they were Clans, because my friends didn't understand why a Clan wouldn't be called (something)Clan, but I preferred my alternate continuity and used that when labeling drawings of the cats.

I was Mudwisp/Mudstar, leader of Calicopelt(s?)/CalicoClan. There was no official symbol as far as I remember, but the associated color for Calicopelt (I'm going to use the singular even though it's entirely possible it was Calicopelts) was cobalt blue (the way RiverClan is sky blue, WindClan is lavender, ThunderClan is light green, ShadowClan is faded red, and StarClan is pale yellow based on the interactive maps). Calicopelt's territory was a mix of woods and streams. It was full of brave cats who liked to hunt. Most of my friends were considered to be in Calicopelt. Calicopelt cats wove bags out of grass and carried prey in them.

I decided a guy I didn't like was Rockhead/Rockstar (he liked to sing and I thought he was really annoying) of Iceheart(s?)/IceClan. I don't know if I ever told him his name was Rockhead, but I do think I told him he could be Rockstar if he was a Clan leader. If I disliked someone I just stuck them in Iceheart, so it was a pretty big group. This lent itself well to making Iceheart the villainous colony (again, I liked ants). They were cowards who liked to steal prey and kits from Calicopelt. Their associated color was icy blue-green.

One of my friends was Hawkfire/Hawkstar of Leapinglegs/LeapClan. Leapinglegs and Calicopelt had a long-standing alliance, and Mudwisp and Hawkfire were friends in-universe. Leapinglegs was a colony of quick and clever cats, but they weren't very brave. Their territory was like WindClan's but with more streams. Their associated color was sort of a wheat yellow.

However, Hawkfire and I got into a fight. She abandoned the Warriors games, and they mostly fell apart, but that left me with complete control of canon. In-universe, Hawkfire betrayed her colony and brought a bunch of rogues and loners into the forest to lead, because for some reason Leapinglegs wasn't good enough for her. I think officially she broke the peace and was driven out of Leapinglegs for ruining their alliance and also being a jerk?

Anyway, the scariest, most evil name I could come up with for Hawkfire's new colony was…Spottingburst (which would have been SpottedClan if it had been relevant to the games). They were all evil, more genuinely evil than Iceheart. Their associated color was scarlet.

(I think the name "Spottingburst" had something to do with wanting to kill everyone from Calicopelt?)

This left her best friend, Leopardpelt, as the leader of Leapinglegs (or Leopardstar of LeapClan). Leapinglegs was torn between keeping their alliance with Calicopelt or bowing to Spottingburst's superior strength.

Additionally, my best friend was my deputy, Hawktalon. She didn't really get Warriors but she thought the game was fun enough. My little sister was an apprentice named Goldengolden/Goldenpaw (apprentices might have been called learners?).

Kits had single-part names (Mud), learners had their kit names doubled (Mudmud), and warriors had full names (Mudwisp) that did not change upon becoming leader.

At one point Hawktalon became suspicious that Mudwisp was a traitor because Mudwisp used a word she misunderstood, so Hawktalon and Goldengolden tried to kill Mudwisp. Eventually Mudwisp managed to get the rest of the colony to see the battle (she moved to the mouth of the leaders' den, which is where they were fighting), so Hawktalon and Goldengolden got exiled and went to join Spottingburst. (The real life Hawktalon and Goldengolden were not aware of this.)

Mudwisp = me
Rockhead = not in comics
Hawkfire = Agateclaw
Leopardpelt = Leopardpelt
Hawktalon = Amberfang
Goldengolden = Ashtail

Here's a recent picture of the four leaders:

Goldengolden was a golden tabby; Hawktalon was sort of the same color as Hawkfire but shorthaired, and instead of faint tabby stripes she had one big thick stripe on each side of her body. The stripe was sort of like a large crescent centered on her back; the stripe on each side started in the middle between her shoulders (touching) and curved so that it ended up pointing slightly back upward at the end.

Update! It appears my memory was somewhat faulty!

So, I'm thinking the top row is leaders, the second row is deputies, and the third row is medicine cats.

Top left is clearly Mudwisp, and right below Mudwisp is Hawktalon, who looks a bit different from what I described above, but that's a very familiar design.

Next, that's Hawkfire--I definitely had a picture somewhere of her looking vaguely like she does in my new picture, so I'm guessing the red and black color scheme existed back in this image but she wasn't fluffy. And of course the cat with rosettes below her is Leopardpelt.

The third cat…this is very strange, because I was so certain Rockhead was solid tan, but Iceheart…didn't have a leader before him, did it? Maybe it did, and the third deputy is Rockhead while the third leader is someone I've completely forgotten? Or maybe Rockhead wasn't tan.

Then…that's Spottingburst over there. I guess they already existed, and Hawkfire just pulled a Tigerstar? Or maybe she returned to Leapinglegs after a while…?

Genderqueer

tiger beetle

Warrior Fanatic

=^ò.ó^=

Pronouns: all (default they)

other old fanfictions update 7/4 Jun 15, 2017 21:56:38 GMT -5 wadevvilson likes this

Quote

Post by tiger beetle on Jun 15, 2017 21:56:38 GMT -5

Flamepelt

SPOILER: Click to show

Okay, this was another story that was Totally Not a Fanfiction, in the same way that Calicopelt/etc. was an original universe. I don't remember if there was actually anything different about the setup of the not-Clans, but I do know that the names were a bit different. Somewhere around half of cats had two-part names, and the other about half had single-part (but still word) names. Names did not change over the course of their lives.

Some (but not all!) cats had powers.

The story was about a journey. I'm not sure if I ever decided why they took the journey, but they did.

I made a typo ("cats" as "cata") and decided that "cata" was a title for a respected cat. Flamepelt exposited about how he looked up to the brave catas.

Flamepelt was the leader of his group. He looked like Firestar. He was sort of the main main character.

Darkear and Stormtail were brothers. There was a third cat, Yellowfeet, but I can't remember if she was their sister or not. Darkear was a brown tom ~~with one black ear~~; Stormtail was a gray tom ~~with a black tail~~; Yellowfeet was a gray she-cat with yellow paws. Yellowfeet had super speed. Stormtail was a bully and probably had super strength. Darkear and Yellowfeet were both main characters, but I don't remember Darkear's power.

Quick edit: I later reused the characters in another story, and it appears the black ear and tail were additions that came with the re-universe-ing of the characters.

There was also a cat named Exhilarationfire, and I'm like 99% sure that I deleted the document because I didn't want to keep that name in my computer and was ashamed to know I had typed it.

One of the other groups was led by a cat named Sky. I'm pretty sure she was a white cat, but I always pictured her as light blue anyway? The main character from that not-Clan was named Violet, and I think she was gray, but I pictured her as purple anyway. Violet might have been the medicine cat, deputy, or equivalent to one of those.

When Violet told Sky about needing to go on the journey, Sky forbade her from leaving camp. However, when Sky went to make an announcement from an extremely high rock, she fell and was impaled on sharp stones on the ground. She was alive, but she needed to be healed. (If Violet was the medicine cat, then there were multiple medicine cats.)

Either Violet now had the power of a leader and therefore the authority to un-ground herself or the plot point was simply that Sky could no longer stop her from leaving because she was so hurt. Violet just left.

I wish I hadn't deleted it…

Glidertalon and Catbird. I guess they were the villains? That's vaguely familiar, but it's also possible they're not supposed to look evil. Catbird was the deputy (or equivalent) for Flamepelt's not-Clan.

So the top left is Flamepelt, the top right is Catbird (wouldn't have recognized them except for the previous image), and the bottom three are labeled. There's actually something I like about Stormtail's face.

Model Magic (Dappled Leaves original) universe

SPOILER: Click to show

My sister (Ashtail) and I made lots of small cats out of Model Magic. (Model Magic is a modeling clay that air-dries but does not become brittle or crumbly. It can be broken pretty easily, but it doesn't shatter.) All of the Model Magic we used was originally white, but you can mix marker into Model Magic, so we could make cats of any color. (Black was difficult to make, but I figured out a way using a mix of Sharpie, watercolor, and watercolor pencil.) You can also draw on Model Magic cats, but it tends to wipe off.

Mine tended to be about 3/4 of an inch long, but some were more like an inch; she had some that were like 1/4 of an inch tall and some that were as tall as 5 inches. Being very small or very large was an advantage, because…

1. If a cat's leg or tail broke, we could ignore that unless we wanted it broken for plot reasons.
2. If a cat's head/neck broke, or if its body broke in half, it was dead.
3. Ashtail had final say over whether or not her cats were dead. She tended to glue them back together.
4. If we agreed, my cats were also allowed to be resurrected.
5. It was generally agreed upon that we should not try to kill each other's cats.
6. Leaders still had nine lives and could be glued as necessary.

Other things about the universe:

1. Basically any group of cats could be considered a Clan. If you brought your two friends into the forest, went to the Moonstone, and said, "Hey, StarClan, I'm Heather, and I'm leader of the new Clan HeatherClan," then they would name you Heatherstar and give you nine lives. You had to have at least one cat to rule to make it a Clan.
2. If there was only one cat left in the Clan, they still counted as leader and got nine lives.
3. I had a rogue named Firefang who lived at Twelvetrees (yeah Twelvetrees) who was cursed by StarClan. Every time he got to his last life they would appoint him leader of something arbitrary and give him nine lives. He was just old and creepy in the "he's ancient and doesn't want to be here" sense.

I made a mountain lion out of Model Magic, but we had plastic tigers that we initially used as mountain lions but then eventually decided really were tigers. They'll come in later.

In the beginning, we each owned some Clans, and there was no overlap.

Ashtail's Clans: RiverClan, ThunderClan, LeafClan, DawnClan, DuskClan

RiverClan cats were (with very few exceptions) very large and fat. Smallstar and Lazytail were her characters. In Dappled Leaves I made Lazytail a nickname, but in the game that was his real name. There were also RiverClan cats named Bigbelly, Fatbelly, and Fatcat. Cindertalon and Orangetalon might have existed; if so, they were the only RiverClan cats that were not white. (Remember, it was easiest to make white cats, because that was the default Model Magic.)

Many ThunderClan cats were blatant expies or actual copies of canon cats. The leader was Tigerstar, but he was a small, friendly brown tom with green eyes. His successor, Bluestar, was white with a yellow stripe on her back; Ashtail intended her to be cool, but she was just a huge jerk. There were cats named Flamescar, Graystripe (he was solid gray but eventually the white "cobweb" on his back became a white spot), and Silverstream.

Other ThunderClan cats included Mercurytail, Foxtail, Sunshine, Lightningtail, and Fuzzytail.

LeafClan…the leader was named Whitestar. All of the cats in it were white. LeafClan lived in the trees and rarely touched the earth.

I don't remember any cats from DuskClan or DawnClan.

My Clans: ShadowClan, WindClan, SkyClan, FlameClan, NightClan

ShadowClan was also full of blatant expies.

The leader was a dilute tortie with green eyes named Tawnystar (Tawnyheart). She was the daughter of the previous leader, Icestar. Icestar basically had Bluestar's backstory before Bluestar's Prophecy was written. Icestar's brother Brackenpaw died falling into a gorge. She had two sisters; I think one of them was named Bluesomething. Tawnystar was pretty much Tawnypelt. Her sister was named Tansypelt.

The medicine cat was named Rainbowheart. She was what I called "pewter-colored," because I didn't know that pewter was the same color as silver. What I meant by "pewter-colored" was that I made some blue and orange Model Magic and mixed them together until they were almost solid in kind of a greenish gray color. (Think old calculator screens but a little grayer.) She had one blue eye and one orange eye.

Her apprentice was named Badgertooth. He was my favorite character. He was small and dark gray with a white head with black stripes on it; he had blue eyes. I don't know why I cared so much.

My favorite cat was a fluffy golden tom with orange eyes named Shinepelt; he had an apprentice named Whitepaw. Ashtail despised Shinepelt; she had ThunderClan lead constant raids on ShadowClan for the in-universe reason that ShadowClan was Evil but the out-of-universe reason that she wanted to break Shinepelt. Whitepaw made it to her warrior ceremony and was named Whitefur, but she was killed shortly afterward.

After breaking Shinepelt, Ashtail broke Badgertooth just because she felt like it.

Other ShadowClan warriors included…
Tansypelt: brown she-cat
Brightshadow: tall, slender white she-cat with green eyes and a brown underbelly
Blacklegs: original deputy; white tom with black legs
Blackbelly: white tom with a black underbelly and possibly also black tailtip or ears or something (much later in timeline)
Featherpelt: light gray she-cat
Stormfall: dark gray tom; Featherpelt's brother; huge rivalry with Blacklegs
Badgerface: I glued Badgertooth's body together and said Badgerkit was named for him

relevant to Dappled Leaves:

Yellowtail: yellow tabby she-cat that I didn't like
Twistedfoot: peach she-cat with a twisted foreleg (became Peachfur for Dappled Leaves)
Firylegs: calico tom with lots of orange on his legs; I insistently spelled it as "Firy-" instead of "Fiery-" until I got to writing something other people would see
Willowpaw/leg: dilute tortie she-cat who looked like she was pale gray with peach stripes; Firylegs' apprentice

There was a not-quite-mixed-together gray rogue (very tall, probably 5/4 inches? with a fluffy tail) with a black star on her chin named Swift Star. Canonically ShadowClan took care of her, so when she had eight kits and could not take care of them, she gave them to ShadowClan. I do not remember all of them, only six…

Zebraheart (became Zebrastripe for DL)--I didn't like him: black and white tom with blue eyes
Marbleswirl: longhaired black and white tom with blue eyes
Mottlepelt: black and white tom
Nightswirl: black and white she-cat
Zigzagpelt: white tom with black streaks (ended up with golden glitter on him)
Shadeheart: black and white she-cat

WindClan also had a couple, but I didn't care about them, so I mostly ignored them. I have forgotten most of them.

Tallwhisker: black and white tom with golden glitter on his paws (made it into TU:SP as a ThunderClan warrior for some reason)
Redfoot/star: white with orange points; not sure why he was evil, but he was
Chocolatetail/star: brown tom with yellow eyes and a dark brown ridge on his back; had a weird black marking on his right cheek because for some reason I tried to give him pupils but missed on the right and gave up - last surviving WindClan cat!

SkyClan

Lianastar: orange she-cat with a white muzzle and blue eyes
Swirledfur/star: gray and yellow she-cat with blue eyes; I genuinely liked her, even though I made her mean in DL
Dappleface/star: swirled orange and white she-cat
Redear: swirled red and white she-cat - last surviving SkyClan cat!
Graycloud: fluffy gray tom with golden eyes
Passionflower: swirled peach, white, pale yellow she-cat with light blue eyes
Cloudedfur: white and peach tom
Butterflytail: dark brown she-cat
Orangefoot: orange tom with big paws
Starcloud: big white tom with a gray mark on his back
Yellowfur: evil yellow medicine cat with blue eyes
Thunderhead: brown tom with a yellow ear (Thundercloud with a white ear in DL)
Snarepaw: mottled ginger and white tom with green eyes; he was my favorite, so Ashtail killed him; this was one of the few deaths where she was actually like "what the--! shut up, I didn't kill him, he's not dead, you can glue him back together" and I let him stay dead because I told her not to kill him and she ripped him in half what did she expect

FlameClan: It was very common for FlameClan cats to be ginger and white with green eyes.

Firestar (Firefoot): ginger and white tom with one green eye (other missing)

When Firestar went to get his nine lives, he somehow got wedged into a tiny tunnel leading into the Moonstone cavern. A flood (like the Fallen Leaves tunnel flood) came and pushed him through into the cavern. He was impaled on the Moonstone and technically died, but because he reached the Moonstone he was given nine lives and survived anyway. Yeah.

Gingerclaw: ginger and white she-cat with green eyes; Firestar's mate and deputy

Cinderstreak was my favorite. She was a big, fluffy not-quite-fully-mixed silvery she-cat with black streaks/stripes, and she was the medicine cat. Her apprentice was named Whitepaw. She and Whitepaw went on a quest, which I'll get to later.

NightClan: Most NightClan cats were white with some color markings.

Hazelfur…you'll see…
Bluefire/star: white she-cat with black on her back; I tried my best to avoid Bluefire ever becoming leader, but Ashtail just kept killing all the cats until Bluestar was the last one left

Okay, so now we get to Cinderstreak's quest. Ashtail had a Clan that was supposedly far away called WeirdClan, but they had broken up, just like canon SkyClan. The WeirdClan cats were all sparklecats.

Notail/star: blue she-cat with yellow eyes and no tail
Purpleheart: medicine cat; purple she-cat

I don't remember the others.

Bordering WeirdClan was Ashtail's other Clan, FormClan, in which all cats were very large and had twins with rhyming names. I remember Goldstar/Boldstar and Goldstar's replacement Coldstar; Boldstar and Goldstar were initially called Boldface and Goldface.

Somehow WeirdClan started coming to Twelvetrees for Gatherings, even though it supposedly took a month for a cat to walk there. The FormClan cats also started attending Gatherings, but they were so large that we decided it was plausible for them to show up. It really shouldn't have been…but then, they shouldn't have existed in the first place…

I believe I made a cat for WeirdClan with my favorite purple marker pen. Maybe I just made the cat for no reason, but I think she was for WeirdClan. This was when I discovered something amazing. When I made her she was purple. I lost her for a while, but eventually I found this ice blue cat that was the right shape. I thought I must have forgotten making this ice blue cat.

Then the ice blue cat's tail snapped and she was purple on the inside so I made another cat purple with that marker pen and waited a few weeks. It turned ice blue.

How did Dappled Leaves happen?

Everything centers around the Wave of Death.

Before the Wave of Death, Hazelfur split from NightClan with her newborn kits. She reappeared with them as her apprentices and with a band of rogues, went to the Moonstone, and became Hazelstar of HazelClan. She had a vendetta against her old Clan and killed a couple of them. Ashtail took this as her opportunity to have DuskClan and DawnClan try to eradicate NightClan.

This was very unfortunate for NightClan, because they basically immediately lost all their warriors, leaving just Bluestar, who got killed by hostile DuskClan and DawnClan cats, who were then promptly lost somewhere and declared dead.

The Wave of Death began. DuskClan, DawnClan, NightClan, and FlameClan dropped off the map, and SkyClan was eliminated… RiverClan (which…only had about six cats at any given time…) had comparatively long-lived warriors because they were so fat (and therefore hard to break), but they ultimately all died, too. (Smallstar broke in an accident; the others were a little less compact, though technically much larger.) WindClan got ravaged. ThunderClan decimated ShadowClan. All the LeafClan cats and most of the FormClan cats were physically lost (Goldstar and a replacement Coldstar remained).

The SkyClan part is specifically important. What happened was that right after Hazelstar happened, we went on vacation. We could still play with the cats we had, but we didn't have any Model Magic to make new ones. Ashtail was absolutely furious that Hazelfur could start her own Clan, thus giving me six Clans (ignoring that she already had seven Clans when I had five). She also personally disliked all the cats I liked, so she wanted to kill them. DuskClan and DawnClan decided to destroy WindClan. I didn't really care about WindClan, and I thought letting my cats die would make Ashtail stop and think about what she was doing.

It didn't. She proceeded to wage war on ShadowClan. I stopped playing with ShadowClan before she could kill too many cats. I got bored and entertained myself by playing with SkyClan, and I decided I loved the characters. Starcloud and Yellowfur were evil for no apparent cause. Ashtail was jealous that I had a full Clan (since SkyClan had, until then, not participated in the war), so she decided to wipe them out.

Swirledstar's disappearance and reappearance is because I lost her and found her again. Dapplestar became leader, was demoted when Swirledstar returned, and then became leader again when Ashtail repeatedly smashed Swirledstar. Dapplestar did not have a fancy plotline; I chose her as main character because I thought I could make a plot out of it and because I thought the name Dappleface was funny.

Blazingheart, Hazelstar’s son, abandoned HazelClan to make his own heroic Clan to take her down.

The stragglers from ShadowClan and ThunderClan finally teamed up to destroy HazelClan. One or two HazelClan cats surrendered. Ashtail killed them anyway.

Chocolatestar made it to the cliff where WeirdClan and FormClan lived, but the official story is that the equivalent to BloodClan wiped them out and briefly entertained the idea of living like a Clan. (The real story is that Ashtail's character Yarrowstar, a giant cat and the last leader of ThunderClan, relentlessly hunted him down for being from WindClan.)

Blazingheart took refuge in the side of WeirdClan’s cliff and basically advertised Clan life. There were two ways to get in and out of the camp—the cliff face and a tiny tunnel. This became instrumental in hiding from the six mountain lions (and later tigers) that wanted to eat the cats.

BlazingClan…
Whitesnow (mine): Big white she-cat, formerly a kittypet named Snow White.
Cloudtail/star (Ash): Tiny white she-cat covered in scars who was glued together at least thirty times.
Screechfur (mine): Dark brown and black tom with yellow eyes.
Brackenheart (Ash): Brown and gray tom. He had a nearly identical brother.
Squirrelpelt and Brambleheart came to join BlazingClan but decided not to. Instead they hung around near SongClan and tried to kill SongClan border patrols.
Chocolatestar tried to join BlazingClan, but Yarrowstar would not let him anywhere near the cliff.
Whitemouse (mine): Gray Siamese tom, former loner.
Silvermouse (Ash): White tom, former loner.
Blazingclaw (mine): A yellow tom, like a sickly gross yellow, with orange eyes, named for Blazingstar after the leader’s death.
Splashpelt (mine): Gray and white tom.

BlazingClan had many, many more cats than that, but I don't remember the rest.

SongClan was started by Song(star), who thought Clan life looked cool. In-universe the giant group of travelers disliked the open cliff face. The real reason they didn’t join BlazingClan was just that they didn’t all fit in the camp at the same time (I mean, you could fit them in there, but it was extremely crowded) because they came at a time when BlazingClan had a lot of cats.

Then there was another wave of death and BlazingClan had about five members at any time from then on and then we stopped playing.

BoneClan, the BloodClan equivalent…yes, they had the collars…
Pebble (Ash): Little gray tom.
Bolder (mine): Dark gray and black tom with a yellow underbelly. Very emphatically was not named Boulder, because although he was Pebble’s second in command, he did not want to be thought of as an extension of Pebble.
Brick (mine): Reddish brown tom whose paws are soft and bleed a lot from the concrete. When Ashtail’s cat tried to kill him by snapping his neck, what actually happened was that she broke his (dark purple Model Magic) collar. I peeled the rest of the collar off, but his neck was stained, so canonically he had bad bruises and a neck that was forever sore.
Rock (Ash): Pathetic gray tom.

After Brick went to the forest and got his collar ripped off, he came back to find that Rock had taken his job. Rock was a whiny little thing, so Brick beat him up until he gave his job back.

Brightwhisker (poorly drawn blood)

SPOILER: Click to show

No document exists for Brightwhisker. I only have two pictures, but they contain enough information that I can guess at her whole story.

Okay, so first of all, I do remember making a strange weasel-like character with the same spot pattern as Brightwhisker. The weasel thing was named Mira. However, Brightwhisker was the original, and Mira was created when I wanted to make a real story about the character. Brightwhisker looked better than Mira, though, so I stopped caring after designing Mira's armor. Don't worry, Brightwhisker never made armor.

This image is helpfully titled "brightwhisker and the crystal" and was created and last modified 1/23/12

This image is rather unhelpfully titled "narwhals" and was created and last modified 1/19/12

I loved the effect I used to make that background. I called it the bloodstream effect.

Anyway, here's what I know for sure.

Brightwhisker started out as a regular Clan cat. Maybe a little rude sometimes, but everyone is. Generally followed the code, but was not so great about the "don't steal prey" rule. Would fixate on pretty things; liked to collect feathers and shells (not sure if she was in RiverClan or not, but that was my favorite Clan, so probably).

Either late into her apprenticeship or early after becoming a warrior, she saw a very beautiful crystal. This crystal was important to the Clans in some way. (Knowing me, I doubt it was magic; it was probably just considered rare and beautiful. I think the most likely scenario is that I could not come up with a reason for it to be important, which is probably a large part of why I never wrote it.) Brightwhisker became enraptured by the crystal. She obsessed over it for a while, then eventually stole it, killing someone to do so. She might have then left the Clans with the crystal?

The rest of the story was about her trying to keep what she had done a secret while also continuing to be possessive about the crystal and squirrel away all kinds of pretty things. She was eventually found out. Not sure what happened to her.

(Tadpole)

SPOILER: Click to show

Plotline:

Edit: hey you, you think you're gonna spoil BG for yourself? Tough luck partner! Read the remake on my dA, Dawnsilence!

My art does not reflect the gravity of the situation.

created and modified 6/5/12

Faces from left to right: Icicle looking suspicious, Snowflake goofing around, Cloudy being a nobody, Tadpole, Lynn, Thistle, Thorn, Sniff

created and modified 8/9/13

Lyrics are from Desperate by Decyfer Down.

created and modified 3/23/12

TadpolexLynn. I vastly preferred the green background, but everyone else said pink was better. I appear to have deleted the pink version.

created and modified 4/24/12

TadpolexLynn again. Why did I care? They were evil! That was the whole point!

The Last Hope comic (poorly drawn blood in pencil)

SPOILER: Click to show

I had recently learned how to use the fancy brushes in the Pixelmator update. The colors are actually fairly nice, though I went overboard on it.

Shadow(star): Where is that badger?
Slant: Shadow, calm down.

Slant: I hear something.
Slant: Rock!?
Rock: Midnight is coming.
Midnight: It seems impatient you have become.
(…That was fast?)

River(star): The others want to know who the Fourth is. (nice hair River)
Midnight: Revealed in time it will be. But for Clans, approaching is last sunrise. Cats own choices will make. For the end, be prepared.

(that was the end of the prologue; here's chapter one)

Tigerstar: Stop!
Tigerstar: It's time for my true warriors to come discuss plans.
Ivypool: Okay.
Tigerstar: Not you, Ivypool.

Ivypool: Why not? I'm loyal.
Ivypool: I mean sure! I won't…I'll stay… (the writing here is just sublime)
Tigerstar: …
Ivypool's thoughts: Stay? Me? No.
Ivypool: !
Nightstripe: You! (this is Nightstripe, Zebraheart's sister, from the DL/MM universe! since that supposedly takes place within the canon Clans, I put Nightstripe and Shadeswirl in here…)

Shadeswirl: You're alive.
Nightstripe: The meeting is for dead cats only. (this was not mentioned)
Nightstripe: But if you really want in…
Ivypool's thoughts: I don't even have time to react.
Dovewing: IVYPOOL! You flailed and got my ear and now you're bleeding all over the den!

Ivypool's thoughts: I don't think Brambleclaw trusts me. But it's worth it to save the Clans.

(I think this might be a new chapter now?)

Jayfeather's thoughts: I smell blood.
sound effect: sniff
Ivypool: Jayfeather?
Jayfeather: I'm just about to leave! Fix your own problems. I'm busy. (the implication was supposed to be that he doesn't trust her, but he just comes across as an incompetent medicine cat)
Briarlight: It's okay, Jayfeather. I can help.

Jayfeather's thoughts: I wonder just how much blood there was.
Littlecloud: Jayfeather!?
Kestrelflight: Jayfeather!
Willowshine: He's not our friend, Kestrelflight.
Mothwing: He killed a cat. And not out of pity. (some of these cats feel OOC…I still don't get why it was such a big deal to the Clans at large in canon; I should have changed that)
Kestrelflight: How did he see to kill him? (has WindClan not heard the gossip?)
Jayfeather's thoughts: Stupid Kestrelflight.
Jayfeather: One, I was trying to save him. Two, it was his destiny to die. And not mine. (if it didn't work the first time it's not going to work now Jayfeather)

Willowshine: Liar!
Littlecloud: You're a liar just like your mother. Both of you are killers. (I'm sorry Littlecloud why did I do this to you)
Littlecloud: Cinderpelt saved my life and it's Leafpool's fault she died. (Littlecloud isn't like this???)
Willowshine: You're not even a medicine cat anymore!

Jayfeather's thoughts: And the next thing I know, I'm being chased by a crazy she-cat. The hypocrite.
Jayfeather's thoughts: But I get back safely.
Jayfeather's thoughts: And I dream.
Yellowfang: You're no more important than the rest now you've made up your mind to ignore the prophecy! You could have done something…
Yellowfang: But you wasted your time, and now look what you've done. StarClan is divided and you still haven't found the Fourth!
Yellowfang: The Clans are doomed because of you!

Jayfeather: But I'm one of the Three…
Yellowfang: You don't get it…
Yellowfang: The Three are not enough!

Brambleberry: YELLOWFANG!
Brambleberry: Jayfeather… you are important. Don't listen to her.
Brambleberry: But you still must find the Fourth. (if StarClan is divided then why is Brambleberry hanging out near Yellowfang)

(this is definitely a new chapter now)

Foxleap: Wow, nice catch!
Blossomfall: Hey, Foxleap, let's hunt near the ShadowClan border.
Blossomfall: Coming, Dovewing? (isn't this the book where Blossomfall supposedly matured though)

Dovewing: ShadowClan? --Okay.
Tigerheart: Dovewing! (how does he know she can see him?????)
Dovewing: Blossomfall, I--uh--found a mouse. Don't wait for me.

Tigerheart: Twilight. Right here.
Dovewing: What? I can't believe--
Dovewing: --of course.
Dovewing's thoughts: So we meet. And it's nice--no, it's wonderful. I hate him so much… but my heart disagrees with me. And I can't fight it anymore.

(well that was bad)

Genderqueer

tiger beetle

Warrior Fanatic

=^ò.ó^=

Pronouns: all (default they)

other old fanfictions update 7/4 Jun 15, 2017 21:56:50 GMT -5 wadevvilson likes this

Quote

Post by tiger beetle on Jun 15, 2017 21:56:50 GMT -5

Outcast (document "Outcast" created 6/1/2010 and last modified 6/26/2011)

SPOILER: Click to show

(I'm honestly mortified to be sharing this one)

(the art on the "cover" is not mine, but it also has this quote:) "Unite or die. Fight tooth and claw. The forest's destiny is in your paws, and yours alone. Something terrible is coming, and you outcasts are the ones who can save the forest." (wow suspenseful)

The loner licked his fur. Nothing could stop him now, he was certain of it!

It had been a taxing day. He'd been chased by foxes, Twolegs, badgers, cougars, and all sorts of enemies. What's more, he'd been having those kinds of days all the time. (wow that's a pretty long day)

Finally, though, he was now gazing down at a shining expanse of water. Stars twinkled above and below him, sparkling shards of light in sky and sea. (2010 me was about as dramatic as 2015 me apparently)

A vast beach spanned the length of the water's edge, and waves lapped at the shore. The loner's eyes were already adjusted to the dark, and he could see the mica-flecked sand. (I was a showoff who liked to talk about mica in sand)

Nothing below seemed to stir, but above the cat's head, a bat darted back and forth. He sat and watched the tiny, mouselike creature as it ate insects.

“Good day,” he meowed, feigning politeness. “Sir Bat, I expect you know what's coming; if I were you, I'd scram before someone eats you.” (I guess I thought this was hilarious)

The loner leaped up in a spectacular attempt to catch the flitting bat, but missed and came tumbling down to earth with a thud.

A sudden flash of lightning startled the cat, and he blinked. Steady rain began to fall; it was more thoroughly soaking than the previous drizzle.

The bat retreated, and the loner stared upwards. Stars no longer shone. Clouds covered the sky.

But the miracle was that the sea reflected no clouds. Stars still blinked in the rippling water. (does this have to sound like Dawn)

A sign: he was meant to be here. He knew it before, but here was his proof.

A sign! He was an amazing sign-reader. To other cats, the sea would be cloudy, with dark shapes hiding the stars. To him, all the brightness of the ancient, faraway fireballs blazed in the waves. (wait is it really a sea? I thought this was a lake but I guess it was set near the sea???)

A sign. The cat sighed. He loved his sign-reading powers, but he was tired of sign after sign after sign invading his life.

Evil was coming, though, and he was glad there were still signs.

“These cats better believe me,” he muttered. “If they don't, this is a waste of time.”

The cat began to bound down the sloping foothill. The perilous mountains loomed behind him and to his left. In front of him, the sea was no longer starry. The moon hung high in the air, only partially hidden by the massive clouds.

The loner felt a chill that could be lessened by entering the water; he'd heard of sea breezes and land breezes. (look how much of a showoff I was this is terrible)

But for tonight, he'd brave the cold. It wasn't actually cold, just a little chilly.

“I'll get those cats' help.” The loner felt his eyes closing. “I'll get them, or my name's not Starrise.” (okay, disclaimer: I genuinely do not remember whether Starrise was a villain or not)

(apparently there are no allegiances or anything? here's the rundown of it!)

First, the animals. The story is set in South America. It includes cats, jaguarundis, margays, Andean mountain cats, oncillas, and Pampas cats. I may also have thrown in a kodkod or something, but I don't know if I knew about the other cats back then. I also probably had hybrid cats in there. Jaguars and cougars were referenced as existing; the smaller cats could talk to them, but there were no jaguars or cougars in the Tribes.

There were eight Tribes: the Dawntribe, the Dusktribe, the Thorntribe, the Wavetribe, the Sandtribe, the Nighttribe, the Birdtribe, and…the document I'm looking at (which I am going to put below Outcast) says Dawntribe a second time, but I distinctly remember there being eight; I'm thinking the last one was the Mountaintribe.

When kits are born, they do not have names. Later on they are given names. I believe that it works slightly differently in Outcast than it did in the Jaydawn continuity, but I guess we'll see about that. "Learners" have one-part names.

The warrior-equivalent is divided into alpha, beta, gamma, delta, and epsilon because it never occurred to me that the alphabet could have been in a different order. Obviously alpha is the best and epsilon is the worst. Similarly to Rainingwinds, there was a very rigid naming system, and only very special cases (such as the Moonpool example) could warrant different names. The system was set up to tell everyone in no uncertain terms who the "good" and "bad" not-warriors were.

In initial and final continuities, rather than alpha-epsilon, the ranks were known as high, medium high, medium, medium low, and low rank.

Alpha/high: -heart (because obviously it's that they are internally better than others; it's totally just their spirit that propels them in life)
Beta/medium high: -flight (because of the phrase "with flying colors")
Gamma/medium: -pelt (very neutral word)
Delta/medium low: -claw (not around for their skill, just for numbers in battle)
Epsilon/low: -tail because tail is the back end of the cat

Also, the leader got to decide what rank cats would become. Therefore, favoritism was part of the system.

The document I'm looking at lists 3 healers per Tribe, but I could have sworn there were supposed to be five. All healers had -leaf, and they were strongly encouraged to have kits.

The kits of the oldest healer were treated slightly differently from other kits. The oldest healer's kits would usually receive their prefixes earlier in life than most kits. Once they became learners, males would get -pool and females would get -wing. This is because I really wanted Blackpool and Swiftwing to keep their names and also to justify why Swiftwing was chosen as leader at the end of the story. The process of choosing the next leader from the available heirs was similar to Rainingwinds.

If the oldest healer died, their kits lost the special treatment and the special names, and the new oldest healer's kits got the chance.

There were also two guards and one "runner guard" per Tribe. The guards guarded the camp, while the runner guard would be more accurately described as a messenger. Guards had -stripe, and runner guards had -whisker. Not sure if there was any logic to those names.

The leader's suffix was the prefix of the tribe. For example, when Swiftwing became leader of the Dawntribe, her name would change to Swiftdawn; the leader of the Dusktribe, however, was named Wetdusk. After a leader retires or dies, their name flips around. So once Swiftdawn gets her name, the previous leader, Ivydawn, would change to Dawnivy. Therefore it was expressly forbidden to use the prefix of a Tribe as the prefix for a cat.

Mythology time! Each Tribe has a little fire burning in a hole somewhere. Legend says that long ago, back when the area was almost exclusively jaguarundis, jaguarundis were pure white. One jaguarundi named Mudfeet (he was said to be from so long ago that they had not yet established their naming system) was tired of being cold in the winter, so he snuck into a Twolegplace and stole a burning stick. However, upon reaching home, he caused a forest fire. Some jaguarundis were caught in the flames and turned red; others were covered in soot and turned gray. A very small number of jaguarundis were completely charred (melanistic), and a very small number escaped the fire but never forgot what they saw (red-eyed albinos). The Mudfeet story was not supposed to be taken as fact, but it was a common legend to all the Tribes.

Chapter One

Reddawn's ears pricked up. A cat was lurking around somewhere nearby! (fun fact: Reddawn is a red-phase jaguarundi)

The Dawntribe's leader padded into the bushes, tense so she didn't make too much sound. Briars tugged at her fur. Leaves rustled. Then she saw movement.

The shadow of a stranger lasted only a moment, but Reddawn clearly saw that the cat was larger than she.

That was no surprise. Reddawn's struggles had been harder than most leaders'; it was a wonder she'd survived.

The fact was, Reddawn had been a runt of a cub. The only reason she wasn't thrown out was because of who her father was. Foxdawn-well, now he was Dawnfox-even in the weakened, crippled state he'd been in after retiring, had continually insisted on keeping the small red cub. (remember how the leader gets to choose who becomes the next leader from a pool of existing cats)

Reddawn twitched her long, tapering tail as she detected that the cat hadn't left.

Reddawn scanned the clearing. Moss hung on the trees to the south, but she couldn't see the moss on the north trees. (wrong!!! even if moss really did perfectly hide from the sun like that, you're in the southern hemisphere)

The grass was soft and springy. A sandy spot in the clearing's center was riddled with pawprints from training the tribe's learners.

With a yelp, she noticed two glowing eyes focused on her.

Two cats! (how do you mistake one cat for two)

One eye was bright yellow. The other eye was bright blue.

Then she realized they were just one cat's eyes.

Odd-eyes! That's an odd-eyes!

The odd-eyed cat never blinked as Reddawn inspected the bright eyes.

Then a voice. It seemed to echo all around Reddawn, but never come from anywhere, and the commanding voice was everyone she knew and no one she had ever heard of at the same time. (Starrise is magic in case you didn't get that yet)

“What do you want?” A simple, challenging phrase. The voice frightened Reddawn.

“Who-who are you?” she mewed nervously.

The cat's voice purred. “I am Starrise.”

“What do you want from me?”

“The forest's safety,” replied Starrise.

“What?” she gasped. “But I'm not useful in that kind of situation!” (there is no situation Reddawn)

“Yes, you are!” thundered Starrise from the underbrush.

Reddawn's ears grew hot. (no not the hot ears) “I'm too small. I can barely lead the Dawntribe. It was Foxdawn's decision that I even stayed in the tribe, and he's too weak to help me now. If it weren't for him, I'd still be a delta, or maybe even an epsilon. Or worse, dead!” (yes, go ahead, call out that favoritism that is the only reason you're not dead and also the reason you're the leader)

“But it was for him,” reminded Starrise. “Besides, I came for each tribe's outcasts. Outcasts can do much more than incasts.” (no Starrise you're not cool)

“Incasts?” Reddawn was wary of this cat's way of speaking.

“I suppose that it would be more proper to say... normal cats.”

“Oh!” Reddawn was desperate to stop the conversation. “So first I'm this savior jaguarundi, then I'm an outcast, and now I'm weird?” (yeah nice job stopping the conversation Reddawn)

“No.” Starrise's voice was firm as he continued, “The others don't look up to you as they should, yes?”

“Right, but...” Reddawn suddenly knew what the loner meant. She wasn't treated the same, and she'd always noticed it. But she wasn't exactly an outcast anymore.

“Your father was noble,” acknowledged Starrise, “but he sure played favorites.”

Reddawn had to agree. (yes that is literally all you have thought about this whole time except for Starrise's eyes and voice)

“So what now?” she meowed, less panicky. “Do I go defeat a giant badger or something?” (from a very quick google search, it appears that no badgers live in South America, although they do have grisons, which are related)

“Meet me at twilight tomorrow night, right here.”

“Then what?” Reddawn was eager to know what was going to happen. (was she really)

“I can't tell you.”

Chapter Two

Reddawn padded through the familiar briar tunnel. Upon reaching the small pile of freshly caught prey, she selected a pair of mice.

“Reddawn!” squealed one of Charcoal's little cubs. The dark orange jaguarundi balanced on her hind paws. “Look what I can do!” (BP came out in 2009 which was before I wrote this--hello Mosskit)

Her dark orange brother came charging through the clearing. He began skidding along the forest floor, then stopped a whisker's length from the delicately balanced cub.

“Yaah!” he yowled, and lunged at her. She toppled over, and the two cubs began to wrestle on the ground. Soon, the brownish-gray cub had joined in.

Reddawn smiled; those cubs would be seven moons old soon. (okay you can't smile but that's fine I'm more bothered by the terrible writing)

A twig snapped behind the red-orange jaguarundi queen. She took a sneak glance and suppressed a chuckle as she noticed it was Blazeleaf's cubs.

The more golden of the margay cubs leaped first, sinking tiny, needle-like claws into Reddawn's back.

“Who is it?” she mewed playfully.

“Watch out! The Dusktribe is attacking!” the gray-brown male squeaked. Then all of the cubs piled onto Reddawn. She rolled over, careful not to squash any of the young cats, and batted her paws around.

“Ambush!” squealed the dark brownish margay as a black paw knocked him aside.

“That's for attacking our attack patrol!” Reed, an epsilon, mewed playfully. (???!??!?!??!???? I guess the names weren't as rigid in this version because his name should be Reedtail)

Reddawn grabbed the silver-gray jaguarundi cub and the white cub and pulled them to her. “These are my prisoners!” she growled, and the other kittens shrieked and swarmed her paws.

“Let go!” squeaked the white cub, squirming.

Reddawn opened her paws up. The two cubs hopped away, growling in the funniest possible way.

“Starrise,” murmured Reddawn, “don't deceive me. I want to know how to save the forest, and I want to know now. But I'll wait till twilight tomorrow. I can wait for you.” (well that was kind of a non sequitur but at least it's moving along again)

Chapter Three

“Unite or die! Fight tooth and claw! The forest's destiny is in your paws, and yours alone. Something terrible is coming, and you outcasts are the ones who can save the forest!” (this chapter really makes Starrise look like a villain but I can't tell and I'm not even sure if I decided that at the time)

Starrise's figure, up on the huge stone that towered over the clearing, was silhouetted against the moon. Reddawn was fixed on every word he said.

Cats filled the island; Starrise had escorted them there from their own territories.

“You are not from eight tribes anymore!” yowled the mysterious loner. “You are one being! You breathe the same air, fight the same battle, win the same victory! We are not strong divided by eight. Now is the time to unite! United we stand! Divided we fall! Do we stand or fall? It's up to you, the outcasts!” (if any of this seems familiar, try rereading Ash to Ash; I mined Outcast for dramatic lines)

“Outcasts!” the crowd of cats began to chant. Mostly, the cats were lower-ranked. A couple were medium rank. One was medium-high. There were a few learners. Reddawn, the only leader there, yowled loudest of all. Dawnfox would have been proud.

Or would he? Reddawn pondered Starrise. She knew nothing about this loner; he could be potentially dangerous. (um, I'm not sure that's why he wouldn't be proud)

“Cats of the tribes!” shouted Starrise, silencing the cats with a flick of his tail. “We must choose now who we are! We will face nothing we have ever seen before! Nothing simple, nothing easy! Where do you stand? Are you with me?”

“Outcasts! Outcasts! Outcasts!”

“Yes!” he yelled. “You are the ones who will change the destiny!” (why is everyone getting worked up over this)

Reddawn leaned forwards, imagining she could see Starrise. The big cat's voice was as commanding and amazing as ever.

“Whoa, Reddawn.” Reddawn found she had closed her eyes. “You look like you're sleeping on your paws. What's up with you?”

Reed stood before her. His sleek fur shone in the moonlight.

Not like Starrise, Reddawn realized. Starrise's silhouette against the moon had no color. He'd chosen his place wisely.

Reed's ears flicked back. “Sorry, Reddawn!” he squeaked, remembering Reddawn was his tribe's leader.

She nodded. “That's fine,” she meowed warmly. “Fine.” (I can't tell if this was supposed to show that Reddawn was really nice or that even Reed disrespected her)

Reed sighed with relief. “Well, it's time to go. Come on.”

“Just a moment,” she said hurriedly. Starrise's tail was disappearing over the rock.

“Wait!” she called. Her aquamarine eyes scanned the bushes, but all was still. (why do you have aquamarine eyes)

“Are you looking for me?” The voice surprised her. She turned to see a dark shape against a bush. “Do not approach,” he warned. “Do not approach, or I will go away.” (did I use this in AtA or is it a coincidence? I probably at least absorbed this while mining for quotes)

Reddawn squinted her eyes for a glimpse of color, but his pelt didn't have that shine that Reddawn noticed on other cats. To be more specific, it did shine, but Reddawn got the impression of a shining black hole; this was a shadow, and nothing more. Where was the cat? (magic!!!)

Starrise chuckled. “You cannot see color because you cannot come near enough to see through my disguise. If I approached you, you would see my true color.”

“Which is…”

“It will be revealed in due time,” the loner explained. (that is the exact opposite of an explanation)

“But why not now?” Reddawn felt panicked, and had no idea why.

“In due time.” Starrise's voice was eerily calm, as if he didn't have time for fear, but irritation pricked in every word. (I guess "no time for fear" is supposed to contrast Reddawn panicking but like there's no reason for him to be afraid in the first place so)

Reddawn felt as if her ears were on fire. (the hot ears are back) “Well... I have to go home now.”

Starrise's figure nodded. “Do not worry,” he assured her, “I would not deceive you.”

He'd better not. Reddawn wasn't sure if this conversation had helped, but she'd enjoyed it.

Hopefully, Starrise had too.

Chapter Four

The stars shimmered. Leaves rustled in the bushes. Reddawn's paws were silent on the grassy ground. (this is the part I'm most embarrassed to share guys here it is more than Exhilarationfire why did I delete Exhilarationfire and not this)

A twig cracked, but it didn't startle Reddawn. Cats surrounded her, shining tigers, lions, panthers, and other felines of all kinds.

But it was the cat sitting in the front that interested Reddawn most. She leaned closer, wrinkling her nose.

A serval? Reddawn had heard of the tribes that the cats had descended from; the legends weren't true, though... were they?

The cat had pale yellow fur, like straw. Its tall black ears were round, and each had a white spot on the back. The cat's short fur was ruffled at its shoulders, but its pelt was groomed. Black spots were lined up in stripes down its back and sides.

The cat's tail lashed suddenly, and Reddawn fixed her gaze on it.

The tail wasn't as long as it should be. It was ringed with black like the cat's front legs.

Then the cat turned. It had amber-hazel eyes and a big black nose. White dusted the cat's muzzle.

It was a serval, all right. Some believed that the royal serval was a hoax. That it had never roamed the ancient world. (legends say that the jaguarundis who founded the first Tribes came from a place far away where every species of cat lived; since servals don't live in South America, the Tribes think of them as a thing from a long time ago)

But here was a serval, right in front of Reddawn's eyes.

Servals. They were real. Reddawn couldn't imagine before exactly what it would look like, but this majestic feline fit the description.

Fur as yellow as straw. (you just described it don't do this)

Black spot-stripes.

White muzzle.

Black, round, white-spotted ears.

Then a voice came from behind Reddawn. She turned, but a shimmering tiger blocked her view.

“This is the world you need to remember.” Reddawn knew that voice, but somehow, she couldn't place it. (um)

“Where are you?” she cried.

The serval in front stood up. It was puny compared to a tiger; a tiger would practically be able to eat it!

Then the serval's eyes flashed. Something about the colors sparked Reddawn's mind; again, she couldn't place it. (yes you can shut up)

Cobalt and gold, Reddawn loved those colors. (get it!!!)

“Take heed,” the serval commanded. “What you see and hear is true. Follow your instincts, and you will survive. For the serval's glory makes him an outcast wherever he travels.” (I took some quotes from this serval for AtA)

Reddawn squinted in confusion. “What do you mean?”

“I mean,” began the serval. “I mean,” he repeated in a more tired voice, “you and I have something in common. I should dwarf the others because I am king. You should overshadow your tribe because you lead them. Instead…”

The serval waved his paw. Reddawn was gazing down at an image in the air.

“Now what?” she was mewing to Coal. (I guess the names were sometimes just single-part…huh) The black guard snorted under his breath-she hadn't noticed that when this had happened-and shrugged.

Then another image. The tribe was ignoring Reddawn. (wow, how specific)

The serval lowered his paw. Reddawn wrenched her eyes away from the swirling wisps of vanishing cloud.

“Do you see?” he inquired gently. “Do you?”

Reddawn closed her eyes. When she opened them again, the serval and the forest were fading, to be replaced by rocks, moss, and forest floor.

“Yes!” She nodded emphatically. “I see.”

As the serval vanished completely, she added, “Thank you!” (I guess this guy was connected to Kestrelstar from BG)

Chapter Five

“What?” Reddawn blinked. “They're already climbing?”

“Yes. I thought you'd be pleased.” Blazeleaf sounded apologetic. (Blazeleaf I can't believe this) “One day, one of these will be leader-if I survive, that is.”

“Yes. Uh, well, what are you going to name them?”

“These are the Destined, Reddawn.” (oh wow they have a title too) As the oldest healer, Blazeleaf would make one of her cubs the leader after Reddawn.

“Yes…” Reddawn's mind whirled. What was she forgetting? Oh, yes, she remembered now.

“Follow me,” she ordered.

The narrow passageway was dark, but Reddawn knew the way by heart. Anyway, there was nowhere to turn, so they couldn't get lost.

They at last reached the Fire Cave. The embers were glowing faintly; Rowan, the runner guard, hadn't been there for quite a while, however, and the fire had gone out.

Reddawn placed a flint rock on a tall stone beside the charred wood as Blazeleaf dropped dry aspen twigs onto the pile.

Reddawn held the flint down with her paw and scraped another stone against it. Sparks flew onto the dry wood. (why did I write cats making a fire)

The fire ignited. The margay cubs watched in awe as Reddawn swiftly drew her tail through it, not catching on fire.

“Now you try it,” Reddawn ordered.

The golden cub's tail was smoking as it came out, the dark cub's tail had a singed black spot, and wisps of flame still clung to the brownish-gray cub's tail, but no cub was hurt.

Reddawn turned to Blazeleaf.

To the golden cub, Blazeleaf said, “You will be called Aspen.” She turned to the dark cub. “You will be called Shade.” She turned to the brownish-gray cub. “You will be called Grass.

“Now, um, you'll be Aspenwing, Shadepool, and Grasswing.” Reddawn looked to Blazeleaf, who nodded in approval. (according to the punctuation, the speaker was the same in both paragraphs--however, the first paragraph is Blazeleaf naming her cubs, and the second paragraph is Reddawn giving them suffixes! oops)

To the little margays, Reddawn explained, “Aspenwing will one day become Aspendawn. If something were to happen to Aspenwing before that time, Shadepool, you would become Shadedawn. If something happened to both Aspenwing and Shadepool, then you, Grasswing, would become Grassdawn.”

“What if we all got hurt?” squeaked Grassdawn.

“Then Blazeleaf would be displaced as healer.” (oh yeah! if a healer has kits but all of the kits die then the healer retires)

Reddawn didn't elaborate; (…and neither did I)

The Heart of the Forest: I'd Touch the Sky for You (document "I'd Touch the Sky for You" created 6/17/2010 and last modified 7/28/2010)

SPOILER: Click to show

(looks like this version was all cats and might not have been set in a particular place)

Allegiances

the Dawntribe
Leader: Gingerdawn—sandy queen with emerald green eyes (this is Gingerstar from Ominous Signs)
Healers:
Silverleaf—silver queen with icy blue eyes
Foxleaf—rusty orange tomcat with amber eyes
Jaguarleaf—black queen with dark emerald eyes (…jaguars are usually orangish with black spots)
Runner Guard: Wetwhisker—white queen with black paws and face and yellow eyes (evil!!!!! it's her! another Ww continuity!)
Guards:
Nettlestripe—gray and brown tomcat with jade eyes
Grass-stripe—grayish queen with golden eyes

High Rank:
Jadeheart—pale gray tomcat with jade green eyes
Needleheart—silver queen with white paws and cobalt blue eyes (Kittens: black and white, silver, tan and gray, tan)
Medium High Rank:
Shadyflight—dark gray tomcat with one icy blue eye
Medium Rank:
Taluspelt—tan tabby tomcat with blue-gray eyes
Rosepelt—calico queen with green eyes (Kitten: golden)
Grizzlepelt—dark brown tomcat with ragged fur and orangy-amber eyes; a darker stripe down his back
Gladepelt—brown dappled queen with white paws and pale blue eyes
Cicadapelt—mottled brown tomcat with large golden eyes
Lilypelt—pale peach and white queen with bright green eyes (Kittens: white, black, peach)
Medium Low Rank:
Mottledclaw—dark brown, mottled tomcat with jade eyes
Low Rank:
Starrytail—black tomcat with white speckles

Learners:
Violet—gray queen with blue-gray patches, a white muzzle, and violet-blue eyes
Blaze—bright ginger tomcat with greenish-blue eyes
Bright—black tomcat with bright silver stripes on his shoulders and back and bright yellow eyes
Calico—calico queen with spring green eyes

the Dusktribe
Leader: Cobaltdusk—silvery queen with black stripes and cobalt blue eyes (names like this are why this naming system is a bad idea)
Healers:
Eagleleaf—brown tomcat with a white head and paws and dark emerald-green eyes
Smokyleaf—gray tomcat with cloudy black spots and icy blue eyes (first Blazeleaf and now Smokyleaf I'm done I didn't do this on purpose I promise)
Marshleaf—brown tabby queen with silver paws and dark amber eyes (Kittens: gray tabby, black)
Runner Guard: Boulderwhisker—dark gray tomcat with amber eyes
Guards:
Cloudedstripe—brownish-gray tomcat with black spots and blue-green eyes
Clawstripe—brown and white queen

the Thorntribe

the Wavetribe

the Sandtribe

the Nighttribe

the Birdtribe

the Dawntribe (…again)

Heart of the Wild

SPOILER: Click to show

Plot: A kitten who was not yet old enough to know her name dreamed about the ocean, and in the dream she was named Jay. She asked her parents about it, and they acted horrified. She had another dream about being named Jay. Soon she became a learner and was named Jay.

Stuff happened. Bad stuff, probably. She became Jayclaw but then very quickly moved up to Jaypelt and then Jayflight. She was Jayflight for a very long time before becoming Jayheart. Eventually one of her parents was the oldest remaining healer, and after the previous leader died, she became Jaydawn.

I don't remember the actual plot, just that she moved up through the ranks a bunch. One of the covers implies a journey, though…

Here are the covers.

1.1 Broken Trust 4/13/10

1.2 Unkept Promises 4/21/10

1.3 Hidden Truth 4/13/10

1.4 Fading Code 5/10/10

1.5 Unspoken Word 4/21/10

1.6 Justice 4/21/10

So her nose is black on three covers and pink on the other three. Also, on three of the covers she has eyebrows, on two she does not, and on one she's looking the other way. The creamy color also changes.

Broken Trust implies that Jay doesn't trust anyone because of their reaction to her dreaming about the ocean and being named Jay.
Unkept Promises implies that she was lied to.
Hidden Truth (or rather the "background" of the cover) implies a journey complete with mountains, beach, and waterfall.
Fading Code implies that she comes home to the Tribes descending into chaos.
Unspoken Word…there's not much to go on here.
Justice is pretty straightforward.

Thunder Rises

SPOILER: Click to show

I actually think I could fix up the story to be something pretty decent. Unfortunately it had some pretty pathetic beginnings.

So in the original, there were five groups (packs?) of crepuscular (because I was a showoff) winged cats in the forest. Two of the groups had single-part names and the other three had two-part names? Maybe the other way around.

The cats didn't really like hanging out with other cats, except maybe some family members.

Star was the leader of whatever group Blue was in. Later on I got rid of the factions and made Star leader of the whole forest after having rallied a bunch of cats to help her end the constant fighting for good.

Blue was estranged from her family completely. In the first version, Pearl is introduced when Blue divebombs her to steal a mouse, then realizes she's just attacked a cat she could consider a friend. Apparently Blue babysits for Scrub Jay, Star's sister. Pearl's brother, Thunder, disappeared a long time ago; Pearl has a very vague recollection of there being a second kit, and Scrub Jay has gotten more protective of Pearl since then.

Meanwhile some kid named Steve keeps seeing flying cats, but no one believes him. His pet cat, Berryflower, likes to go into the woods and hang out with the flying cat named Citrus. Citrus lied about his hours of activity so that Berryflower wouldn't talk to him too much.

A berry and a small, star-shaped flower show up in Blue's nest, and she has to ask someone for help. Winged cats are supposed to be able to read omens, but Blue can't. Citrus agrees to help. The sign most likely says that someone is going to poison Star.

The basic plot is that prey starts turning up drained of blood. This wouldn't be a problem except that whoever's drinking the blood is killing a whole lot of prey and leaving most of it to rot. Blue and Citrus investigate this, and Blue starts enjoying Citrus's company.

Then Thunder comes back, and they start taking care of him alongside Pearl again.

Eventually Berryflower turns up drained of blood, and then Scrub Jay not long after that. Blue and Citrus are still trying to figure out who's behind this. Then Star dies and Thunder is king of the forest.

Book two, Stormfall, was about how they found out that Thunder was the killer the whole time, he kills more cats, and everyone drives him out of the forest, ripping the feathers out of his wings.

Guess who's in my avatar!

Here's the original cover:

Asexual kinkajou i lovewing mothwing	other old fanfictions update 7/4 Jun 16, 2017 14:45:51 GMT -5 Quote Select Post Deselect Post Link to Post Member Give Gift Back to Top Post by kinkajou on Jun 16, 2017 14:45:51 GMT -5 I honestly liked the Dappled Leaves comic : p

Genderqueer tiger beetle Warrior Fanatic =^ò.ó^= Pronouns: all (default they)	other old fanfictions update 7/4 Jun 16, 2017 16:11:04 GMT -5 Quote Select Post Deselect Post Link to Post Member Give Gift Back to Top Post by tiger beetle on Jun 16, 2017 16:11:04 GMT -5 Jun 16, 2017 14:45:51 GMT -5 kinkajou said: I honestly liked the Dappled Leaves comic : p well, thank you! but I do think it lost a lot when I turned it into a written story

Genderqueer tiger beetle Warrior Fanatic =^ò.ó^= Pronouns: all (default they)	other old fanfictions update 7/4 Jun 17, 2017 14:41:07 GMT -5 via mobile Quote Select Post Deselect Post Link to Post Member Give Gift Back to Top Post by tiger beetle on Jun 17, 2017 14:41:07 GMT -5 I've been going through my stuff, but my papers are in boxes that are the perfect size for my cat to curl up in, and he needs a lot of attention

nem	other old fanfictions update 7/4 Jun 17, 2017 15:21:47 GMT -5 Quote Select Post Deselect Post Link to Post Member Give Gift Back to Top Post by nem on Jun 17, 2017 15:21:47 GMT -5 Ominous Signs has the best allegiances in existence.

Genderqueer

tiger beetle

Warrior Fanatic

=^ò.ó^=

Pronouns: all (default they)

other old fanfictions update 7/4 Jun 17, 2017 15:35:18 GMT -5 via mobile

Quote

Post by tiger beetle on Jun 17, 2017 15:35:18 GMT -5

Jun 17, 2017 15:21:47 GMT -5 nem said:

Ominous Signs has the best allegiances in existence.

my favorite part is how Cinderclaw and Cinderstripe are in the same Clan

edit: I changed my mind; my favorite part is that Gingerstar doesn't exist

Asexual

kinkajou

i lovewing mothwing

other old fanfictions update 7/4 Jun 17, 2017 17:47:26 GMT -5

Quote

Post by kinkajou on Jun 17, 2017 17:47:26 GMT -5

Jun 17, 2017 15:35:18 GMT -5 tiger beetle said:

Jun 17, 2017 15:21:47 GMT -5 nem said:

Ominous Signs has the best allegiances in existence.

my favorite part is how Cinderclaw and Cinderstripe are in the same Clan

edit: I changed my mind; my favorite part is that Gingerstar doesn't exist

wow i didn't even notice that

speaking of ominous signs how long ago did you make that cover?

Genderqueer

tiger beetle

Warrior Fanatic

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Pronouns: all (default they)

other old fanfictions update 7/4 Jun 17, 2017 17:53:15 GMT -5 via mobile

Quote

Post by tiger beetle on Jun 17, 2017 17:53:15 GMT -5

Jun 17, 2017 17:47:26 GMT -5 kinkajou said:

Jun 17, 2017 15:35:18 GMT -5 tiger beetle said:

my favorite part is how Cinderclaw and Cinderstripe are in the same Clan

edit: I changed my mind; my favorite part is that Gingerstar doesn't exist

wow i didn't even notice that

speaking of ominous signs how long ago did you make that cover?

I'm guessing it was 2009

Asexual

kinkajou

i lovewing mothwing

other old fanfictions update 7/4 Jun 17, 2017 17:57:08 GMT -5

Quote

Post by kinkajou on Jun 17, 2017 17:57:08 GMT -5

Jun 17, 2017 17:53:15 GMT -5 tiger beetle said:

Jun 17, 2017 17:47:26 GMT -5 kinkajou said:

wow i didn't even notice that

speaking of ominous signs how long ago did you make that cover?

I'm guessing it was 2009

Lets just say you improved a lot since then

Genderqueer tiger beetle Warrior Fanatic =^ò.ó^= Pronouns: all (default they)	other old fanfictions update 7/4 Jun 17, 2017 17:59:54 GMT -5 via mobile Quote Select Post Deselect Post Link to Post Member Give Gift Back to Top Post by tiger beetle on Jun 17, 2017 17:59:54 GMT -5 Jun 17, 2017 17:57:08 GMT -5 kinkajou said: Jun 17, 2017 17:53:15 GMT -5 tiger beetle said: I'm guessing it was 2009 Lets just say you improved a lot since then uh Word shapes art was my prime

Genderqueer tiger beetle Warrior Fanatic =^ò.ó^= Pronouns: all (default they)	other old fanfictions update 7/4 Jun 20, 2017 18:00:13 GMT -5 Quote Select Post Deselect Post Link to Post Member Give Gift Back to Top Post by tiger beetle on Jun 20, 2017 18:00:13 GMT -5 added another RC thing and I have a whole bunch of art to scan and upload

Asexual kinkajou i lovewing mothwing	other old fanfictions update 7/4 Jun 20, 2017 20:30:28 GMT -5 Quote Select Post Deselect Post Link to Post Member Give Gift Back to Top Post by kinkajou on Jun 20, 2017 20:30:28 GMT -5 the suffix 'head' just goes bad with everything wait i thought of the worst name...starhead

Genderqueer

tiger beetle

Warrior Fanatic

=^ò.ó^=

Pronouns: all (default they)

other old fanfictions update 7/4 Jun 20, 2017 20:37:08 GMT -5 kinkajou likes this

Quote

Post by tiger beetle on Jun 20, 2017 20:37:08 GMT -5

Jun 20, 2017 20:30:28 GMT -5 kinkajou said:

the suffix 'head' just goes bad with everything

wait i thought of the worst name...starhead

beautiful Starhead is my new OC a beautiful silver she-cat whose eyes are usually a pale clear shimmering cerulean blue but turn dark when she's sad, red when she's angry, and white after she becomes leader of StarClan without even dying first

Genderqueer tiger beetle Warrior Fanatic =^ò.ó^= Pronouns: all (default they)	other old fanfictions update 7/4 Jun 20, 2017 22:54:46 GMT -5 Quote Select Post Deselect Post Link to Post Member Give Gift Back to Top Post by tiger beetle on Jun 20, 2017 22:54:46 GMT -5 added some more stuff including the main sequence of events after RC and the Model Magic universe

Asexual kinkajou i lovewing mothwing	other old fanfictions update 7/4 Jun 20, 2017 23:51:34 GMT -5 Quote Select Post Deselect Post Link to Post Member Give Gift Back to Top Post by kinkajou on Jun 20, 2017 23:51:34 GMT -5 I made you an art

Genderqueer tiger beetle Warrior Fanatic =^ò.ó^= Pronouns: all (default they)	other old fanfictions update 7/4 Jun 21, 2017 12:13:14 GMT -5 Quote Select Post Deselect Post Link to Post Member Give Gift Back to Top Post by tiger beetle on Jun 21, 2017 12:13:14 GMT -5 Jun 20, 2017 23:51:34 GMT -5 kinkajou said: I made you an art oh hey thank you! he's cute

Genderqueer tiger beetle Warrior Fanatic =^ò.ó^= Pronouns: all (default they)	other old fanfictions update 7/4 Jun 29, 2017 11:41:08 GMT -5 Quote Select Post Deselect Post Link to Post Member Give Gift Back to Top Post by tiger beetle on Jun 29, 2017 11:41:08 GMT -5 someone come ridicule me

Genderqueer tiger beetle Warrior Fanatic =^ò.ó^= Pronouns: all (default they)	other old fanfictions update 7/4 Jul 1, 2017 15:29:31 GMT -5 Quote Select Post Deselect Post Link to Post Member Give Gift Back to Top Post by tiger beetle on Jul 1, 2017 15:29:31 GMT -5 big update

Asexual kinkajou i lovewing mothwing	other old fanfictions update 7/4 Jul 1, 2017 16:55:03 GMT -5 Quote Select Post Deselect Post Link to Post Member Give Gift Back to Top Post by kinkajou on Jul 1, 2017 16:55:03 GMT -5 tbh i was never really into snarepaw im sorry

Genderqueer tiger beetle Warrior Fanatic =^ò.ó^= Pronouns: all (default they)	other old fanfictions update 7/4 Jul 1, 2017 17:07:18 GMT -5 via mobile Quote Select Post Deselect Post Link to Post Member Give Gift Back to Top Post by tiger beetle on Jul 1, 2017 17:07:18 GMT -5 Jul 1, 2017 16:55:03 GMT -5 kinkajou said: tbh i was never really into snarepaw im sorry no need to be sorry I was ridiculous

Asexual kinkajou i lovewing mothwing	other old fanfictions update 7/4 Jul 1, 2017 21:51:14 GMT -5 Quote Select Post Deselect Post Link to Post Member Give Gift Back to Top Post by kinkajou on Jul 1, 2017 21:51:14 GMT -5 Ok so a lot of these aren't absolutely awful...Ive seen worse But Outcast was just......bad (no offense)

Genderqueer tiger beetle Warrior Fanatic =^ò.ó^= Pronouns: all (default they)	other old fanfictions update 7/4 Jul 1, 2017 21:52:38 GMT -5 via mobile Quote Select Post Deselect Post Link to Post Member Give Gift Back to Top Post by tiger beetle on Jul 1, 2017 21:52:38 GMT -5 Jul 1, 2017 21:51:14 GMT -5 kinkajou said: Ok so a lot of these aren't absolutely awful...Ive seen worse But Outcast was just......bad (no offense) none taken

nem

other old fanfictions update 7/4 Jul 3, 2017 11:31:10 GMT -5

Quote

Post by nem on Jul 3, 2017 11:31:10 GMT -5

I like a lot of the ideas behind Outcast, but cats wouldn't know what the greek alphabet was. It infuriates me.

Also, with the third grade game, why did you choose to double the names??? all apprentice names will sound bad.

Genderqueer

tiger beetle

Warrior Fanatic

=^ò.ó^=

Pronouns: all (default they)

other old fanfictions update 7/4 Jul 3, 2017 12:02:07 GMT -5

Quote

Post by tiger beetle on Jul 3, 2017 12:02:07 GMT -5

Jul 3, 2017 11:31:10 GMT -5 nem said:

yeah I get that

they weren't supposed to sound good; they were just supposed to sound different from -paw

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🎄tansypool🪿: I also didn't get my distemper shot... or my lyme disease shot... Nov 25, 2024 11:31:34 GMT -5

🎄tansypool🪿: OR my canine influenza shot :3 or my feline lukemia shot! Nov 25, 2024 11:32:38 GMT -5

🍄🎶✨Brambleheart✨🎶🍄: i got my human flu and covid shots on friday i hope it works for cats like me Nov 25, 2024 11:47:25 GMT -5

ﮩ٨ـﮩﮩ٨ـevīأdīทⲟﮩ٨ـﮩﮩ٨ـ: lol Nov 25, 2024 14:27:19 GMT -5

🩵ẞnøwfałł🩵: yep Nov 25, 2024 14:48:54 GMT -5

ﮩ٨ـﮩﮩ٨ـevīأdīทⲟﮩ٨ـﮩﮩ٨ـ: Why is science class so loooooooong??? Nov 25, 2024 15:14:42 GMT -5

ᯓ - - > ᥲs𝗍rᥲ ` rіsᥱ : x 🦋: petetion to call school apprentice training grounds! -3- also why does the prey at school suck (trying to stay inside the warriors genre) Nov 25, 2024 15:28:28 GMT -5

ﮩ٨ـﮩﮩ٨ـevīأdīทⲟﮩ٨ـﮩﮩ٨ـ: Our apprentice training grounds's prey isn't half bad but the pizza isn't the best. Glad they got rid of the 'pizza burger' Nov 25, 2024 15:57:39 GMT -5

ﮩ٨ـﮩﮩ٨ـevīأdīทⲟﮩ٨ـﮩﮩ٨ـ: Ours has a stuffed crust which is the only good thing about it. Otherwise the sauce is spaghetti sauce Nov 25, 2024 16:17:15 GMT -5

LesbeanWeirdo: The prey at my apprentice training ground is awful. I usually end up hunting and bringing my own. Nov 25, 2024 17:55:48 GMT -5

squirrelpaw: I eat in the room of the books Nov 25, 2024 18:54:11 GMT -5

𝚏𝚛𝚘𝚜𝚝𝚢 ❄: the prey at mine was pretty solid, they made chipotle-style burrito bowls -- still the best ones ive ever eaten LOL Nov 25, 2024 18:54:24 GMT -5

squirrelpaw: The prey at mine is trash I just don’t eat Nov 25, 2024 18:54:43 GMT -5

ﮩ٨ـﮩﮩ٨ـevīأdīทⲟﮩ٨ـﮩﮩ٨ـ: Guys, whats a MAP? Nov 25, 2024 19:18:29 GMT -5

ﮩ٨ـﮩﮩ٨ـevīأdīทⲟﮩ٨ـﮩﮩ٨ـ: I hear people saying there using art for it, and i dont know what it is lkjhgfds Nov 25, 2024 19:18:59 GMT -5

🎄ᦓρ꠸ᥴꫀᠻꪖꪀᧁ🎅: Multi Animator Project! A bunch of animators in the fandom get together to make this big project based on a character to a song. Each animator gets a part to animate and they are all put together for the final project. Go search up warrior cats maps on yt Nov 25, 2024 19:32:22 GMT -5

🎄ᦓρ꠸ᥴꫀᠻꪖꪀᧁ🎅: a bunch will come up! My personal favorite is called Starclan’s Chosen. Nov 25, 2024 19:32:37 GMT -5

🎄tansypool🪿: wait... would a single animator be a SAP?! Single-animator-project? Kudo points if they're single! :3 Nov 25, 2024 20:24:50 GMT -5

🎄tansypool🪿: i have started sketches for a future thistleclaw map! ^^ (no I don't like him!... wouldn't he technically be a purrvert? For the whole spottedpaw thing?) Nov 25, 2024 20:26:41 GMT -5

🎄tansypool🪿: I am just a poor boy
Though my story's seldom told
I have squandered my resistance
For a pocketful of mumbles
Such are promises
All lies and jest
Still a man hears what he wants to hear
And disregards the rest Nov 25, 2024 21:45:04 GMT -5

other old fanfictions update 7/4

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