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Post by Brownie on May 10, 2017 12:41:08 GMT -5
see title ^^ basically you get a read and an honest opinion. - I'll read at least pro+3 chapters, and base my review off that. If I really like it I'll continue but for time's sake that's what I'll put the review line as. - please do not ask for a review and then argue to me why it should be better. I'm giving you an opinion, you can do with it what you want but don't force my words back down my throat okay that's just not polite. - You'll get a rating out of five stars and a short commentary on why I chose that rating. - I'll be taking two at a time. Be patient, I'll get to you eventually, but I do have finals rn so that eventually may be a few days. - Anything other than the actual writing (titles, summaries, page layout ect) will not impact your score, but will probably come up in the commentary portion. Spots - htmf - tues - smoke - mint All spots filled? If you read and comment on my fic, you can be added to the list extra. It's only fair. If you take the time to read and comment on mine, I'll do the same for you. - los - sap - middle - owl - Stones - pika - - Reviewed fics - When the Earth Shook by [~Ghost Writer~] || ✰✰⋆ - - |
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Post by [~Ghost Writer~] on May 10, 2017 12:50:42 GMT -5
Oh! I'd love someone to review my story "When the Earth Shook"
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Post by Brownie on May 10, 2017 12:51:38 GMT -5
sure
I may not get through all of it today but I can give it a shot
and yeah the first part was
I found it and just kept writing and now it has a whole line ready to go
just shows what a simple 'write something about flowers' 'bonus if it isn't a real flower' prompt can do right
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Post by Brownie on May 10, 2017 13:16:17 GMT -5
When the Earth Shook by [~Ghost Writer~] || ✰✰⋆ Okay so two things really stood out about your writing, one good, one bad. Let's start with the good. Your characters are detailed and relatable. I only read three chapters and I could feel the individuality of each of the survivors and what made them unique from the other characters. Particularly with Nettleleap -who I feel is characterized a lot more in depth than the others so far- but also with the apprentices. What I didn't like was the pacing. Everything is very rushed, and I sometimes couldn't tell what characters were where because things moved so quickly. The beginning especially could have taken a lot more of the spotlight to give the characters reason for their emotions, but instead it was quite bland. Try showing us what's going on instead of telling us. It makes it a lot more immersive of a setting. Also, you should probably go back and spellcheck. Just within the first three chapters I counted 10-15 typos. Spelling is something that is easy to check and will make your writing just that much more polished without a lot of extra work, and there's no reason to not do it. The world is very well thought out and I can feel your connections to the setting and characters, you just need to work on the presentation to really make the world come to life.
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Post by [~Ghost Writer~] on May 10, 2017 13:18:44 GMT -5
Thank you ^~^ I'll go back and spell check soon
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Post by mintedstar/fur on May 10, 2017 15:31:21 GMT -5
Can you review Mortality or Where There's Smoke? ^^' I don't care which one...
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Post by Brownie on May 10, 2017 16:06:44 GMT -5
read the front plz
either repost when there is space or do a trade
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Post by 🍁Searipple101🍁 on May 10, 2017 19:48:03 GMT -5
I'm sorry. Earlier was not a good time for my thoughts. I was super tired.
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Post by Brownie on May 10, 2017 20:17:02 GMT -5
it's all good I just didn't want u to be surprised/upset if I didn't add u
putting too many on the list at once just makes me nervous lol
like I need to rush and it's commitment and it's supposed to be chill so I'm limiting it for my sanity
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Post by 🍁Searipple101🍁 on May 10, 2017 20:22:13 GMT -5
I get the feeling, but there's relaly no rush at all. At least, doesn't seem like there is. Everyone here in WFF is generally pretty chill and kind.
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Post by mintedstar/fur on May 10, 2017 20:27:22 GMT -5
I'm chill. :3 However long or short it takes is what it takes.
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Post by 🍁Searipple101🍁 on May 10, 2017 20:31:55 GMT -5
^
What Mint said. I'm pretty patient anymore, too.
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Post by ~Sapphire~ on May 11, 2017 2:15:45 GMT -5
Argh, if that post was aimed at me I'm so sorry. I read the front but it looked like there was only one person ahead? My bad.
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Post by Brownie on May 11, 2017 8:29:12 GMT -5
Argh, if that post was aimed at me I'm so sorry. I read the front but it looked like there was only one person ahead? My bad. nah you're fine you're on the vip list since I requested reviews from you months ago |
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Post by ~Sapphire~ on May 11, 2017 15:32:10 GMT -5
Ahh thank you!
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Post by Owlmoon on May 11, 2017 18:27:48 GMT -5
Could you do Stuck In The Middle and Tigerstar's Betrayal?
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Post by Brownie on May 11, 2017 19:17:11 GMT -5
I could do one or the other my list is getting long lol
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Post by Owlmoon on May 11, 2017 19:19:40 GMT -5
Hmmmm.....
Could you do Stuck In The Middle, then?
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Post by ✲ριкαƒυєу✲ on May 12, 2017 0:35:05 GMT -5
Could you review my 'fic, Uncast Stones? As for reading your 'fic, I already do. After all, I did that contest so you know I did xD
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![[~Ghost Writer~] Avatar](http://storage.proboards.com/6575102/avatar/vVGNctuvWjTLXOffDYEW.jpg)
