Salt
Asexual/Aromantic||Rainbow Thread||#AetherSquad||#SodiumProtectors||#CAHSquad||Bracken/Salt please!
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Post by Salt on Sept 19, 2016 20:42:44 GMT -5
Okay. Starting off real simple. I'm ugly. For six years I've been wasting hundreds of dollars tying to rid of the pimples that cover my face. They're still there! I feel embarrassed and awkward in public when walking and absolutely hate mirrors. I have slight anxiety. Whenever I speak in public, I freak out. I stutter. I'm a nervous wreck. When I suffered with depression, self-harm, and suicidal thoughts- I told my "friends". They didn't care. I felt to scared to tell an adult or my older brother- they would just find out. They never did. When the most snobby girl in school said, "Help! I wanna kill myself!" Everyone stepped up to help her. It was a joke, everyone got that. For me, nope, life's different. White scars still line my wrists where I began self-harming. I was bullied in middle & high school, thus leading to my first attempt. I failed. Never again did I try. I grew stronger and then- moved to Australia. Then things got worse. I was the "unaccented" one at school. I was still teased occasionally. Then my crazy ex-boyfriend "visited" Australia. He almost killed my friends, BeardedDragnz and Wolf's Howl. Everything from then on until now were good. Then the stupid kid from college. Invited me to his home where heade drug chocolate. He called the cops and said that I'd done it. One day or week in prison and a month of house arrest. 2 more days of house arrest. I'm back into suicidal thought mode and have a list of ways to quickly kill myself. It's getting worse daily. I almost died from overdosing on anxiety pills- because of life.
Thanks for listening to me. Means a lot.
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Post by Ginz on Sept 19, 2016 20:45:57 GMT -5
that's awful D: you're cool and don't deserve the struggles you've been having keep strong, my friend i believe in you
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Post by Saint Ambrosef on Sept 19, 2016 20:55:39 GMT -5
this will be weird but what have you tried for your pimples/acne
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Post by Deleted on Sept 19, 2016 20:56:38 GMT -5
You've been strong through this. Remember that there's always someone out there who cares. You can put that all in the past and start fresh, move forward and show everyone that life isn't holding you back and you deserve the rewards. I'm sorry you had to go through all of that.
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Post by Deleted on Sept 19, 2016 21:01:19 GMT -5
At least you're almost through with it. Here to talk if you ever need it. Sometimes all we need is an open ear.
you're welcome c:
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Post by Northstar3213 on Sept 19, 2016 21:06:59 GMT -5
Im sorry all that terrible stuff happened to you. I had a lot of trouble with acne when i was a teenager. and i mean a lot of trouble. I had these large, painful cysts on my face that just wouldn't go away no matter what acne cream or face wash i tried. I'm looking at your pronouns and I'm wondering were you born a biological female? because my mother took me to an OBGYN and got me on birth control to help with my acne (yes, women take the pill for reasons other than contraception. and i take it because i supposedly have this thing called polycystic ovarian syndrome or something like that. but i digress). and my face has never been clearer! Yeah I still have breakouts of acne around my time of the month, but for the most part if I keep my hands out of my face im clear. but if you weren't born a biological female, I have another trick that's helped. I always keep a tube of antibiotic cream handy so that way when i start picking at my face, i just put some cream on the part where i've been picking and that help's keep my hands out of my face and keep infection down as an added bonus.
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Post by Saint Ambrosef on Sept 19, 2016 21:10:15 GMT -5
"I'm John Laurens in the place to be!" OOC~
Almost everything they sell here in Australia.
Roleplay- "Lafayette!" ~Hamilton what about non-products? like lifestyle edits?
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Post by Northstar3213 on Sept 19, 2016 21:11:11 GMT -5
Yikes! Well i think you should try keeping that tube of antibiotic cream handy then.
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Post by Saint Ambrosef on Sept 19, 2016 21:15:16 GMT -5
i can't tell if that was direct at me whoops
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Post by Northstar3213 on Sept 19, 2016 21:30:31 GMT -5
I hope it works for you! And as for dealing with depression and anxiety, I don't know how much help I'll be at giving suggestions. Because I'm actually trying to get help for my anxiety right now, and I've never had to deal with outright clinical depression. But I suggest that with dealing with anxiety specifically, pills aren't the best way to go given your situation, so vitamin supplements are probably out of the question (which is what i've been doing since I don't have any medication) I've found that art has helped me cope with a lot of it. it doesn't have to look good to anyone else but you.
And I know this probably sounds like something you've heard a thousand times already and have already discredited it but its something simple and doesn't involve medication, but that for every way you wrote down on how to kill yourself, that you write down two things/people that make you smile/laugh/feel loved even if its something so seemingly trivial like the smell of clean sheets but what matters is that it means something to you.
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Post by Northstar3213 on Sept 19, 2016 21:40:30 GMT -5
Well when you feel like your art is horrible, just know there's art worth millions that looks like this
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Post by Northstar3213 on Sept 19, 2016 21:49:55 GMT -5
well maybe you should try painting instead of drawing, you wouldn't have to think too much of it when you're doing it and it could still look pretty good.
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Post by Saint Ambrosef on Sept 19, 2016 21:59:06 GMT -5
"I'm John Laurens in the place to be!" OOC~
I've tried 'em once or twice, but I hate them. what kind of lifestyle changes? sorry i know this is all personal and probably awkward but i'm just curious, 'cause there's some very simple things i + friends have done that really helped
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Post by Saint Ambrosef on Sept 20, 2016 8:08:15 GMT -5
"I'm John Laurens in the place to be!" OOC~
Eating less salty food. It helped fpr a bit. There were a few others but they weren't helpful. I mean, salt can have to do with it, but it's mostly greasy/oily foods. Eating more leafy greens could also help because that boosts your metabolism by a ton, helps your digest that stuff rather than trying to get rid of it through the skin. Drinking a LOT of water can help too. You should be drinking about eight (BIG) glasses of water every day. If your body isn't getting enough fluids, it can't flush out toxins, so it will try and expunge them another way. Drinking that much water should be done anyways, regardless of skin. There's different kinds of acne-- for instance, some people have bacterial acne, others have hormonal. Getting a dermatologist's perspective can be super crucial in knowing how to fight it. (Because if you're trying to treat acne with anti-bacterials when it's caused by hormones, it's not going to do anything).
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