|
Post by Basement Cat on Aug 27, 2016 13:47:14 GMT -5
I will be blunt, and probably offend people in this age group.
If you are from 12 to 18, you haven't experienced true love. You are kid. You have not fully matured yet. While it is possible you can find someone at this age, in reality, it is extremely slim.
The teenage years are a time of experimentation towards love. It is a time to decide what you like. A person dates someone their opposite gender and finds they are actually gay. A person tries dating and they find they are actually aromantic, or asexual, or both. A person fine tunes their type through a process of dating. This is quite the change from what dating used to be.
So if the person you are in love with doesn't work out, it isn't the end of the world. You just found out more about what you like in a person. Emotionally, it can be effecting, but in the end, it is unimportant.
Take this advice from a 20 year old.
|
|
|
Post by Deleted on Aug 27, 2016 13:49:39 GMT -5
thank you
|
|
|
Post by Deleted on Aug 27, 2016 13:50:23 GMT -5
Thank you for saying this for me, the romance drama at school is annoying as heck
|
|
|
Post by Jas on Aug 27, 2016 13:52:41 GMT -5
tbh the pain is more of from rejection nothing will make that go away
you can try to rationalize it all you want but the pain won't disappear - especially at that age when self-esteem is so easy to crush
|
|
|
Post by Basement Cat on Aug 27, 2016 13:55:04 GMT -5
tbh the pain is more of from rejection nothing will make that go away you can try to rationalize it all you want but the pain won't disappear - especially at that age when self-esteem is so easy to crush I agree. That is why at that age, we don't sugarcoat things. We tell them the truth. They are going to get hurt. It is going to emotionally suck. However, it will not be the end of the world.
|
|
|
Post by Deleted on Aug 27, 2016 13:58:58 GMT -5
Yeah, I agree. It probably doesn't make the pain of failed relationships any less, but it's also good to have perspective. My parents actually met/dated in this age range (and are still together), but they also waited until they had grown and matured to really decide if they wanted to spend their lives together, so?? It's always important to look to the future and understand just how much you can change as a person in a few years. I know I changed so much from the age of 12 to the age of 18, and I'll probably change even more later on. So yes: the emotions can still be valid, but they're not everything. (what is that point of what I just said goodbye I'm just rambling)
|
|
|
Post by Saint Ambrosef on Aug 27, 2016 14:01:34 GMT -5
basically
i have not dated in high school because high school romances never last. i'm an immature teenager who has trouble telling one emotion from another and can't decide what i want, why would i even bother with a relationship?
|
|
|
Post by Deleted on Aug 27, 2016 14:08:13 GMT -5
I'd agree, honestly. I may not be the biggest effort on romance and stuff like this, but when all comes down to it, it's more a matter of maturity. I don't think 12-year olds can properly handle a relationship because, simply put, it's above their level of maturity. I'd say it's best to wait until you're prepared for a much more serious commitment.
|
|
|
|
Post by Deleted on Aug 27, 2016 14:11:00 GMT -5
i agree with most of this. i think the majority of high school relationships shouldn't be taken as seriously as kids actually take them, and that when youre 16~ or so you should be focused more on other things rather than relationship shenanigans. however, i do think it's entirely possible to really, truly love someone at those ages.
|
|
|
Post by Deleted on Aug 27, 2016 14:13:04 GMT -5
I'm 19 and have never been on a date or kissed. ...guess I'm forever alone Not necessarily, unless you choose to be. There's always a chance.
|
|
Bleak
FINAL SEMESTER, LET'S GOOOOOO
|
Post by Bleak on Aug 27, 2016 14:15:12 GMT -5
I'm 19 and have never been on a date or kissed. ...guess I'm forever alone Not necessarily, unless you choose to be. There's always a chance. I had no options in my childhood (as I was home schooled) and now that I'm in college, I still see no possibilities. I do want a boyfriend though...
|
|
|
Post by Deleted on Aug 27, 2016 14:16:32 GMT -5
Not necessarily, unless you choose to be. There's always a chance. I had no options in my childhood (as I was home schooled) and now that I'm in college, I still see no possibilities. I do want a boyfriend though... Still, who knows? It might still be able to happen. But still- good luck!
|
|
|
Post by swanwhisper on Aug 27, 2016 14:17:14 GMT -5
this is important.
obviously, you can love somebody at that age because love doesn't exist for only people of certain ages - but anyways, most people under the age of fifteen and sixteen don't necessarily have the maturity level to handle a relationship (and yes, some might, but most also might not). rejection's going to hurt either way because being rejected is hard, but hopefully, one would be able to deal with it in a better way as a twenty year old than a twelve year old in some. like Tansy said, emotions can be valid but they're not necessarily everything when you're that age and in a relationship. (yikes, this is a rambling mess, and does it make sense? probably not. I apologize.)
|
|
|
Post by Deleted on Aug 27, 2016 14:57:53 GMT -5
"you are kid" -wcrp user hollyleaf, 2016
But, more seriously, I agree with most of this.
|
|
|
Post by Deleted on Aug 27, 2016 15:05:14 GMT -5
i agree with this. it irritates me at school when people in my year that are literally fourteen years old talk about doing things that you shouldn't rly be doing until you're at least 18. like i honestly don't mind dating under 16, but it should not be that serious. don't do things that you shouldn't and don't make so much drama over it rip. you don't need to argue to someone bc they're in a relationship with someone. it's most likely in a year or two they won't even be with that person anymore. school works that way.
|
|
|
Post by Deleted on Aug 27, 2016 15:56:20 GMT -5
i agree
|
|
|
Post by Suspicious Toast on Aug 27, 2016 16:02:45 GMT -5
tbh I'm only 14 but I agree 100% people make such a big deal of things and it's like "omg we're totally serious about dating"
|
|
|
Post by Deleted on Aug 27, 2016 16:13:44 GMT -5
I agree that you aren't likely to find a life partner at that age, but no one has any right to tell the other when they can and can't find true love.
Loving someone =/= relationships.
|
|
|
Post by Deleted on Aug 27, 2016 16:14:48 GMT -5
lol true romances suck before college tbh
|
|
|
Post by Deleted on Aug 27, 2016 16:20:43 GMT -5
I agree that you aren't likely to find a life partner at that age, but no one has any right to tell the other when they can and can't find true love. Loving someone =/= relationships. bc's not saying people aren't allowed to find true love when you're a kid. she's just saying it's slim to none that you actually find the person you're going to spend the rest of your life with during this time, so don't beat yourself up when things don't work out.
|
|
|
Post by A Meadow Mushroom on Aug 27, 2016 16:58:23 GMT -5
Yeah, that's mostly true. I just don't think it's right when people use it to invalidate what any kid or teenager feels. Because if you feel it, then it's a real feeling. You can't feel fake emotions. As long as the person doesn't become self-absorbed over the whole thing and acts like their love is the biggest thing in the world (because this really is just the age of transition and experiments), then it's really fine to experience it. Hey, lots of people do end up marrying their high school sweethearts, but just be open and don't count on it.
|
|
|
Post by Jas on Aug 27, 2016 17:00:07 GMT -5
romances also suck in college tbh it's about you and the other person not the age you are
|
|
|
Post by Deleted on Aug 27, 2016 17:11:33 GMT -5
Thank you.
I am in that age group and just
ugh
Whenever I see someone at school in a relationship it disgusts me
|
|
|
Post by A Meadow Mushroom on Aug 27, 2016 17:18:41 GMT -5
Thank you. I am in that age group and just ugh Whenever I see someone at school in a relationship it disgusts me I mean, hey, the teenage years are basically just practice time for the real thing. So if they like each other they can do what they want; it's not like we should go around having feelings for people and be like "whelp I'm only a kid so it's useless, better bury it deep down and do nothing about it." So ya know, as long as they aren't grotesquely serious about the whole thing (which happens too and can get uncomfortable), no one should be judged too harshly over it.
|
|
|
Post by Deleted on Aug 27, 2016 17:27:38 GMT -5
From somebody who is in this age group, thank you. Whenever friends, acquaintances, or other people in general, most of them my age, ask me why I'm putting off dating until I'm older, I usually give them an explanation similar to this. But they just don't get it. I kid you not, I once had a conversation that went, word for word, like this with a fellow student:
Girl: "What do you mean you can't date until you're 16?" Me: "It's not just that I can't, but that I prefer not to. I want to enjoy my youth while I can and focus on more important things, like, I dunno, school? Besides, I don't need a boyfriend." Girl: "Yes you do!"
In my opinion, dating can be a way just to get to know other people better. It doesn't have to be serious until you're older and more mature, and ready to actually start thinking about who you might want to spend your life with. It's just better to wait. You have your entire life ahead of you.
-rant over-
|
|
|
Post by SoaringFlight on Aug 27, 2016 17:39:38 GMT -5
But i love my cat. It's true love.
|
|
|
Post by Ginz on Aug 27, 2016 17:50:00 GMT -5
good job bc
|
|
|
Post by Ginz on Aug 27, 2016 17:50:33 GMT -5
But i love my cat. It's true love. you're a pure soul who must be protected
|
|
|
Post by Theblazepanzer24 on Aug 27, 2016 17:53:34 GMT -5
All I found out during that time frame in my life was that I was fine with being a loner. Though I sometimes kinda wish I had a girl friend in High School.
|
|