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Post by epicstyle on Apr 19, 2020 21:48:37 GMT -5
So it seems the common opinion of AVOS is that it started out strong in the first half but fell flat in the second. If you were in charge of fixing the second half, what would you change? Here's what I would do:
-Keep Darktail alive until book 5 or 6. Darktail had the potential to be one of the best villains in Warriors, and the Kin plotline was really exciting. It was a major downgrade when they ended Darktail's story halfway through in exchange for doing basically nothing for three books.
-Don't kill off Needletail. This might be a controversial opinion, since most people have a negative view on her lol. But for me personally, Needletail was one of the most interesting characters in AVOS and I think her character had a lot of room to grow past SS. I think it would have been interesting to see her reaction to SkyClan returning since she was on the quest to bring them back, but also joined the group that drove them out lol.
-Have SkyClan return before Darktail/The Kin are defeated. This would have created so much chaos in the arc; there would have been basically 4 clans living in ThunderClan territory at once lol. Plus we could've had a fight between Hawkwing and Darktail which would have been really nice.
These are just a few of my ideas to improve the arc. Despite my issues with it, AVOS is still one of my favorite arcs. What would you change to improve it?
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#add8e6
Name Colour
*Ravenpaw*
Warrior Fanatic
*reads books in a corner*
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Post by *Ravenpaw* on Apr 19, 2020 21:54:38 GMT -5
I would....
- Give Alderheart and Sparkpelt more spotlight. - Keep SkyClan at the gorge and Twigbranch and co with them. - Keep Darktail alive for about a couple more books.
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Post by Hollyfall on Apr 19, 2020 21:58:03 GMT -5
Unpopular opinion: I was mostly fine with how the arc turned out in it's latter half. Though, I would keep Darktail and the Kin alive as the main antagonists until book 4 or 5.
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Post by ᏞᎪᎠᎽ Ꮎf fᎪᏁᎠᎾms ミ☆ on Apr 19, 2020 21:59:47 GMT -5
the most broad way is to keep darktail and his kin alive and relevant as the main villains until the last book where they're defeated.
there's a bunch of little details to add to that, but since i didnt read the last 2-3 books of AVOS, i can't speak to what details I'd add or fix to make it better.
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Post by Card against Humanity on Apr 19, 2020 22:25:51 GMT -5
just keep darktail and his family alive until book 5. book 6 can be about the aftermath
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Post by ᏞᎪᎠᎽ Ꮎf fᎪᏁᎠᎾms ミ☆ on Apr 19, 2020 23:18:16 GMT -5
just keep darktail and his family alive until book 5. book 6 can be about the aftermath i think an aftermath kinda happened with book 6 of the new prophecy, but a lot of people dont like how slow and anticlimactic sunset was. but i think for AVOS, it would have worked way better if darktail and the kin were defeated in book 5, and book 6 was the aftermath and set up for the next arc. i'd imagine seeing the clans actually recover from such a takeover would be more interesting than sunset's post badger attack recovery.
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#a3c5e6
Name Colour
𝓣𝓲𝓷𝓾𝓿𝓲𝓮𝓵
Warrior Fanatic
All hail me, the flower-flushing queen of Prague
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Post by 𝓣𝓲𝓷𝓾𝓿𝓲𝓮𝓵 on Apr 20, 2020 0:26:24 GMT -5
Darktail is still killed in SS and DN can still be a breather book (except ShadowClan never disbands, though they're still low on members), but RoF could've had the Kin return, this time with either Sleekwhisker or Raven leading them, as either of them had been Darktail's mate.
RiverClan is having a succession crisis after Mistystar dies in a fire, while Reedwhisker and Willowshine are killed by Kin members on their way to the Moonpool. Mothwing is tasked with choosing the next leader, but after so much pressure, informs her Clan that she doesn't believe in StarClan. The Kin try to take advantage of the situation, but RiverClan refuses to join them and take a stand against them; many are either killed or flee to the other Clans for help, with Mothwing being one of the casualties after she fought bravely to defend her Clanmates.
ThunderClan experiences the same sickness as it did in canon, and the only cure is on RiverClan territory. Because of the other threat, many more cats die, such as Briarlight and Whitewing. Eventually, it spreads to the other Clans. Still, they try to negotiate with the Kin, but the Clan cats get attacked every time. Eventually, the Clans decide to work together again to drive out the Kin once and for all, but struggle until Tigerheart and his patrol return to help. A few of the cats with him were originally part of the Kin, and they end up teaching the Clan cats new advanced fighting moves to beat them at their own game.
Eventually, the Clans win, with Violetshine killing Sleekwhisker and/or Raven. Squirrelflight is also unfortunately one of the casualties while saving Sparkpelt. Afterwards, she gets noticably darker and is more hostile towards SkyClan than usual. Molewhisker becomes the new deputy and Leafpool goes to RiverClan until an apprentice is properly trained.
TRS deals with the tense aftermath, with Sparkpelt and cats from other Clans blaming SkyClan for the destruction, especially after a massive storm happens and take this as a sign that the fifth Clan should leave. Sparkpelt continues to slip as the book goes on and tries to do what Juniperclaw did in canon by trying to poison SkyClan, which actually leaves a few cats dead. Sparkpelt is then exiled and she loses many of her followers in the process, thinking she went too far.
Another storm happens towards the end, and Sparkpelt is still determined to avenge Squirrelflight. She tries to get rid of SkyClan one last time, but seemingly drowns to her death while trying to kill Twigheart for interfering.
ThunderClan mourns for the cat Sparkpelt had once been, while SkyClan work on repairing the damage both she and the storm had caused with ThunderClan's help.
Some extra stuff: Violetshine and Tree don't become romantically involved until towards the end of the fifth or sixth book rather than Violetshine already having feelings for him at the start of RoF. Finleap also isn't a creep here, though him leaving for ThunderClan does initially have its consequences.
Tigerheart becomes a regular warrior again while Tawnypelt becomes deputy.
Dovewing wishes to mourn Whitewing at her grave, but Ivypool forbids it, believing her sister doesn't deserve to do so. They eventually come to an understanding by the end of the arc and contemplate on how they could've done things differently, but it's made clear that their relationship has been too damaged to be repaired as it had been before and the sisters part ways on decent terms.
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Post by Hopewish on Apr 20, 2020 0:59:37 GMT -5
three things I would change:
1. Keep Darktail and his Kin around for longer than just 3 books.
2. Make the relationship between Alderheart and Needletail a bit more of a thing..? normally I roll my eyes at how many half-Clan/forbidden Medicine Cat relationships there are, but honestly this one was a bit different? their interactions in TAQ were adorable
3. Make Finleap less of a jerk towards Twigbranch during TRS.. he has every right to be disappointed but he should've just moved on from the idea of having kits with her until she was ready to be a parent
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Post by Rio on Apr 20, 2020 1:21:22 GMT -5
I would have killed off Mistystar lmao
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Post by dragonfruit on Apr 20, 2020 2:19:56 GMT -5
I will never forgive the Erin’s for missing the opportunity to make Sparkpelt a minor villain lol. She had far more potential to be interesting antagonist for the second half of the arc than Juniperclaw, because we could actually see her contempt for Skyclan far more clearly during Alderheart’s pov. Her character was left shallow and undeveloped, and she wasn’t given much any spotlight TAQ. Alongside further elaboration on VioletTree, Finleap doesn’t become an assh*le. Darktail stays around for an extra book, and maybe Shattered sky ends on the Needletail’s death scene for some added tension.
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Bisexual
barley
Bramblestar Hater
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Post by barley on Apr 20, 2020 3:08:46 GMT -5
I would not write it. Shut the arc down, there's no saving it.
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Post by Sundance on Apr 20, 2020 3:27:15 GMT -5
-crackles knuckles- oh boy, do I have thoughts on this :-P Prepare yourselves for my crazy, crackpot AVOS AU and don't say I didn't warn you:
I would have Darktail and his ragtag team of rogues masquerade as SkyClan for the entire first half of the arc-with the other Clans truly buying the ruse.
In Book #1- StarClan sends all the medicine cats ominous, obscure dreams about how SkyClan needs to return, or else. Alderpaw, Sparkpaw, Needlepaw and co. go to find SkyClan. They do, and the Clans welcome Darktail & his posse to the lake territories with open arms. Darktail seems nice, though he is weirdly stricken when he finds out Firestar is dead. (Weeiirrrdd.) Twigkit & Violetkit are found in the last few chapters, and are immediately claimed by Darktail, who says they're either his own lost kits or some fallen warriors. Oh and Sparkpaw is mortally wounded on the journey back home to the lakes by an unknown assailant. Alderheart buries her.
In Book #2- Violetkit is introduced as a narrator. Twigkit is nowhere to be seen-Darktail tells her that Twigkit died, but offers no further explanation. "SkyClan," with Darktail at the helm, takes over ShadowClan. Darktail eviscerates Rowanstar. Needletail gets corrupted. Tensions rise. The other Clans are confused & angry, not understanding why StarClan brought this upon them by demanding SkyClan's return. Some begin to doubt their ancestors. Darktail is openly unbelieving in StarClan. Violetpaw begins to question how her sister died and searches for clue. Tree is introduced and quickly becomes Violetpaw's really weird, loner friend. At the end, it's discovered that he can see ghosts.
In book #3- Sparkpaw's point of view starts. She's not dead after all! Just gravely wounded. She digs herself from her grave and stumbles into Twolegplace. In no time, BloodClan finds her. Back at the lake: despite ThunderClan instigating Darktail, and a fight between their Clans looming, nothing but a skirmish or two happens between them. Sparkpaw is immersed in BloodClan culture, and learns to not only survive, but thrive, in their ruthless world. Early on, BloodClan teaches her that the old Clans in the forest are evil, a notion she has trouble shaking, even when Alderheart meets her in a dream. Elsewhere, a coup against Darktail forms, and is squashed. Needletail sacrifices herself.
In book #4- Violetpaw uncovers a startling truth from Twigpaw's ghost, courtesy of Tree's special powers: when Twigpaw fell sick, Darktail purposefully left her to die. It is unclear why he would be so cruel. Sparkpelt becomes more corrupted in BloodClan, rising to second-in-command. In the end, there is a heated gathering where Darktail, with the might of "SkyClan," ShadowClan, and RiverClan behind him, threatens all-out war with ThunderClan & WindClan. It's just then that Leafstar, Hawkwing, and the rest of the real SkyClan that no one knew existed suddenly appear, battered and bruised. Darktail is exposed for the fraud that he is.
In book #5- Violetshine confronts Darktail over his treachery and he admits to being from BloodClan. (He was either Scourge's son, or simply a BloodClan warrior who was taught from kithood to worship their fallen leader.) The fact that Darktail seemed so angry that Firestar was already dead in book #1 suddenly makes sense. Violetshine learns that Darktail abandoned Twigkit to die because she seemed weak and BloodClan has a policy of abandoning the weak. Twolegs destroy part of ShadowClan's territory, so Darktail threatens ThunderClan for some of theirs. Sleekwhisker, Darktail's right hand man, is dispatched. Sparkpelt becomes BloodClan's leader. Violetshine meets her father, Hawkwing, and narrowly escapes Darktail's forces to join the real SkyClan. When Darktail tries to summon BloodClan to defeat the rest of the Clans, Sparkpelt agrees to aid him. Only to betray him in the final battle, where it's revealed that Darktail is the one who had tried to murder Sparkpelt when she was an apprentice because of her resemblance-and descendancy-to Firestar. She kills him with Violetshine's help. Sparkpelt, with BloodClan behind her, then turns against the Clans.
In book #6- Sparkpelt is public enemy #1. There's another epic battle where Violetshine uses her newfound powers of summoning the dead (whoops did I forget to mention that earlier). At some point, Sparkpelt has a change in heart and decides to stop being evil. BloodClan gets dissolved. Sparkpelt becomes leader of ShadowClan and, since nearly half of ShadowClan's territory was destroyed in Book #5, she teaches ShadowClan how to hunt/navigate in twolegplace. From dumpster diving to dodging cars. A critical new skill for them to learn. Tigerheart is deputy. Violetshine remains in SkyClan with her father & Tree. Alderheart ... I forgot about poor Alderheart, just like the Editor's did. :-P
Other things I'd consider adding: • Mistystar's death, and characterization of her replacement • Breezepelt's redemption and rise to deputy • Darktail utilizing crude weapons like sharpened sticks and booby traps • Sparkpelt befriending a dog while in twolegplace that helps her ascend to leader of BloodClan
Hope someone enjoys my crackpot AU :-P Sorry I started rambling off ideas towards the end, I'm beat! If you've made it this far in my post .... congrats :')
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