gingercut
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Single pringle and too awkward to mingle.
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Post by gingercut on Oct 13, 2017 20:36:21 GMT -5
Ah, alright I'm back. My brain is scrambled so forgive me, I'm watching the videos but need some help? What groups ended up on what floors in the game? Like, not ours, but the actual CP group. I can't remember.
And she didn't make it. They tried detox but it damaged her brain and her family can't afford life support. So sorry if I seem distracted)
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Post by 𝚌𝚊𝚛'𝚊'𝚌𝚊𝚛𝚗 on Oct 13, 2017 20:39:30 GMT -5
feels unfortunate man
nd yeah, i hope their friend's okay
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Post by 𝚌𝚊𝚛'𝚊'𝚌𝚊𝚛𝚗 on Oct 13, 2017 20:44:51 GMT -5
ah, didnt see your reply
im really sorry to hear that.. take all the time you need, irl death is a serious thing and if you need to vent or something ill listen, but take care of yourself
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gingercut
![*](//storage.proboards.com/forum/images/stars/star_yellow.png)
Single pringle and too awkward to mingle.
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Post by gingercut on Oct 13, 2017 20:58:13 GMT -5
Ah no it's fine. Um, it's going to sound dark but ... I'm fairly okay? I mean I feel grief but I've been prepared for this outcome for awhile. She's been showing signs of schizophrenia I think, and refused to seek treatment. And since she's eighteen, technically she couldn't be forced into it. Maybe by court, sure, but her family is more than awful so they didn't contact anyone about it anyways, claiming she was faking and making a show for attention. But she'd have panic attacks, constantly talk about hearing voices telling her awful things about herself. Sometimes she'd hallucinate these shadowy people running at her in the middle of nowhere, and other times she'd say that she could feel maggots in her stomach, and pick at her skin to get them out. Her family basically tried to hide her from the world. And my friends were too scared to talk to her, I guess. But my odd brain has been able to handle it. I've tried getting her help, calling people, suggesting her medicine, so many things that didn't work. She's talked about suicide countless times, and I finally realized that it was either a sort of yes or no type thing. If she didn't, then that's good; but I began to see that she probably would. This is how her story would go. Because I'm eighteen, and I'm too stupid to figure out how to help her, and I don't have be what I need do so do so and it was a waiting game now.)
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gingercut
![*](//storage.proboards.com/forum/images/stars/star_yellow.png)
Single pringle and too awkward to mingle.
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Post by gingercut on Oct 13, 2017 21:05:54 GMT -5
I just ... failed. And I don't know, I just feel numb at this point. Part of me is even relieved(?) if you can call it that. It's over. She's no longer suffering, and I'd like to think she's in a better place.
But that's not how you're supposed to view suicide, and I don't view it that way, it's just in this particular situation? I don't know. I couldn't afford to take care of her on my own, and nobody else would take her either. I'm barely scraping by financially, and taking her in would just end up with us on the streets. And she'd definitely be unsafe then.
But isn't that what you're supposed to do? I was supposed to be "the savior"; the one to get her help, the one to make her feel better; the one to make her GET better. Was I supposed to take her in? Or is that just unrealistic, and only works in stories? All I know is that I didn't. I failed. And I think I knew I would.)
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gingercut
![*](//storage.proboards.com/forum/images/stars/star_yellow.png)
Single pringle and too awkward to mingle.
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Post by gingercut on Oct 13, 2017 21:21:04 GMT -5
Anyways, I just don't want to talk about this right now. I'm completely incapable of doing anything else; this is up to her family now. I'm too young, and they don't like me.
I just want to roleplay, please? If that's okay)
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Post by 𝚌𝚊𝚛'𝚊'𝚌𝚊𝚛𝚗 on Oct 13, 2017 22:10:58 GMT -5
ah, sorry for the disappearing act.. was having a mental moment i know you said you didnt want to talk about it anymore, so this will be my one reply to the subject that you can ignore if youre too stressed; ill put it under a spoiler alert, even you shouldnt blame yourself. it was out of your control, and you did everything that you possibly could do. youre not superhuman or omnipresent; there was nothing else you could do and more from what it sounds like. you were a good friend to her, and im sure she appreciated that at least someone was there for her. and like you said, if you're having difficulties financially then there was really no way that you could support /two/ people, and it wouldve probably gotten worse from there on, for her and for you. you wouldve both been worse off mentally, so dont beat yourself up over that. sorry, im not very good with words so i hope this makes sense.. honestly, the blame is with her family & professionals that she tried to get help from (if im reading correctly). its really, really not your fault and im sorry that you had to go through this
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Post by 𝚌𝚊𝚛'𝚊'𝚌𝚊𝚛𝚗 on Oct 13, 2017 22:12:42 GMT -5
hhmmm, i replied a while ago but im not sure if it would be easy to reply to until elleo gets back ? if you want we can do a 1 on 1 to get your mind off of it too? but i have no rp ideas e_e;;
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gingercut
![*](//storage.proboards.com/forum/images/stars/star_yellow.png)
Single pringle and too awkward to mingle.
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Post by gingercut on Oct 13, 2017 22:27:09 GMT -5
Haha, sorry for taking awhile to reply, your words made me cry ... thank you. Even if it may not seem like a lot, that actually helped. Thank you, again.
And no, sorry I'm just watching the CP videos so that I can come up with a good reply. I realized they show the floors/rooms in the game lol. The map devil posted is blurry on my phone, so I can't tell what rooms are what, although I can read floor numbers)
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Post by 𝚌𝚊𝚛'𝚊'𝚌𝚊𝚛𝚗 on Oct 13, 2017 22:31:22 GMT -5
its no problem! take as much time as you need my bro, and im glad i could help
ooo ive been meaning to rewatch CP again tbhhh... tempting
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gingercut
![*](//storage.proboards.com/forum/images/stars/star_yellow.png)
Single pringle and too awkward to mingle.
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Post by gingercut on Oct 13, 2017 22:45:06 GMT -5
If you mean the anime, idk. I hated it, pueh~ >3< but the gameplay is good. I barely remember watch PewDiePie play it and liking it but right now I'm watching a "speed run" type thing without commentary. Is 1-A the room Naomi and Seiko woke up in?)
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Post by 𝚌𝚊𝚛'𝚊'𝚌𝚊𝚛𝚗 on Oct 13, 2017 22:53:27 GMT -5
ive never seen the anime! i meant a lp ahaha, im too lazy to play it myself ~ maybe when i get the motivation : DDD
im not entirely sure??? ill look at CP again (or if im not feeling like a LAZY LOSER ill play it, maybe screenshare it on discord lolol) and ill see!
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Post by 𝚌𝚊𝚛'𝚊'𝚌𝚊𝚛𝚗 on Oct 13, 2017 23:05:27 GMT -5
cropping icons on this forum............upsets me
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gingercut
![*](//storage.proboards.com/forum/images/stars/star_yellow.png)
Single pringle and too awkward to mingle.
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Post by gingercut on Oct 13, 2017 23:28:08 GMT -5
Hiro relaxed a bit, and his lips turned upwards at the sound of his preferred title. But that quickly vanished at Yuki's deduction. Not in Kisaragi Academy ..? And yet, he found himself nodding even before his mind agreed.
But how? What was happening!?
He opened his mouth to voice his concern, when a sudden gust of air hit the two in the face. As the two began to cough, dust swept up by the breeze hit Hiro in the eyes while Yuki covered his face. With a short groan, Hiro stilled in his movements while bringing his hands to his face.
He wiped furiously at his eyes until the breeze had died down and the debris was gone. Blinking a few times, he looked over to find that Yuki had moved towards the other side of the room. He then noticed Minami's figure from across the room, and his eyes lit up in a moment of relief. Another friend was okay!
As Hiro carefully navigated his way across the patchwork of holes and debris that littered the decrepit floorboards, he listened to the conversation take place. He nodded in agreement with Yuki's apology, though Minami's annoyed tone had only made his heart hammer. He yearned to see if she - and eventually everyone else - was alright, but knew that they had to be cautious as well.
He had reached the row of desks just as Yuki had made it to the other side. With cautious movements, he pressed down on the desk with his palms, testing to see if the floor was still okay after handling Yuki's weight. At first, the floorboards groaned in protest, but eventually stopped when his full weight was applied.
Hiro swallowed while sweat beaded across his forehead, then carefully slipped atop the desk. After what seemed like an eternity, but was only a couple seconds, Hiro had made it safely across without the floor caving in beneath him. With a breath of relief, he persuaded his rapid heartbeat to slow down as he quickly moved to where the other two stood.
While Yuki voiced the question on the duo's mind, Hiro's eyes scanned the girl's figure for any sign of problems. He moved closer to the taller male, seeking some form of companionable comfort in the tense and eerie atmosphere. He would've went to the girl's side, but he didn't want to make things worse in her already upset state, though slightly frustrated that he hadn't tried to get closer to her sooner, when they'd all been together. And she was Shuu's friend! His lips pursed as he hugged himself with a frown, just wishing for everyone to reunite so that whatever this was could be over already.
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gingercut
![*](//storage.proboards.com/forum/images/stars/star_yellow.png)
Single pringle and too awkward to mingle.
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Post by gingercut on Oct 13, 2017 23:30:54 GMT -5
Did you make the icon?? Or is it just a picture from somewhere, lol because I like it XD)
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Post by 𝚌𝚊𝚛'𝚊'𝚌𝚊𝚛𝚗 on Oct 13, 2017 23:32:39 GMT -5
;; i have to wait for elleo to respond but your reply looks so good!!! (*゚▽゚)ノ
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Post by 𝚌𝚊𝚛'𝚊'𝚌𝚊𝚛𝚗 on Oct 13, 2017 23:33:10 GMT -5
its from a game! 1bitheart ;0 i identify with the protag, who is my icon
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gingercut
![*](//storage.proboards.com/forum/images/stars/star_yellow.png)
Single pringle and too awkward to mingle.
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Post by gingercut on Oct 13, 2017 23:37:39 GMT -5
Oh, thanks!! >\\\< I think I finally feel what mental states will fit for my characters, so I felt it was better.
And oooooo, a game you say??? I'll have to check that out ////now, perhaps XDD)
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Post by 𝚌𝚊𝚛'𝚊'𝚌𝚊𝚛𝚗 on Oct 13, 2017 23:40:44 GMT -5
yeee its a rly good game NGL one of my faves,, but also im biaseee
and nice!!! its always a good feel to get a better feel on ocs !!! also if i randomly fall asleep i apologize,
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gingercut
![*](//storage.proboards.com/forum/images/stars/star_yellow.png)
Single pringle and too awkward to mingle.
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Post by gingercut on Oct 13, 2017 23:51:08 GMT -5
Hmm it looks and sounds rather interesting. Also, feel with the char. My HFA brought a slew of mental disorders, ugghhhh. I can have panic attacks even home alone, for random reasons lolll rip
And it's all good! I was probably gonna work on some art or fanfic or sth, plus I think AoT's newest chapter came out so I gtg catch up on that)
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Post by ѕρσттεdѕнιммεя on Oct 14, 2017 1:18:50 GMT -5
[ i'm very sorry to hear that, ginger, so please do feel free to take whatever time you might need. ]
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Post by dandelion on Oct 14, 2017 7:32:57 GMT -5
ahhh I’ll try to respond soon + get something for shuu !! I have family coming over today tho so not sure when it will happen ;w;
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Post by 𝚌𝚊𝚛'𝚊'𝚌𝚊𝚛𝚗 on Oct 14, 2017 11:51:11 GMT -5
good moorning
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gingercut
![*](//storage.proboards.com/forum/images/stars/star_yellow.png)
Single pringle and too awkward to mingle.
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Post by gingercut on Oct 14, 2017 13:21:17 GMT -5
Good afternooooon x.x)
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Post by 𝚌𝚊𝚛'𝚊'𝚌𝚊𝚛𝚗 on Oct 14, 2017 13:27:29 GMT -5
hellooooooo
my cat has currently found a newfound hobby of squishing herself between my back and my chair for optimal pats and warmth while i sit on my computer lol
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gingercut
![*](//storage.proboards.com/forum/images/stars/star_yellow.png)
Single pringle and too awkward to mingle.
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Post by gingercut on Oct 14, 2017 14:02:31 GMT -5
Interesting, although I do not think sitting on your computer would be very good for the hardware :OO xp)
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Post by 𝚌𝚊𝚛'𝚊'𝚌𝚊𝚛𝚗 on Oct 14, 2017 14:24:12 GMT -5
but my computer is my nesting grounds :CC
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Post by dandelion on Oct 14, 2017 18:14:41 GMT -5
here and replyingggg. hope i'm not holding y'all up ;v;
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Post by dandelion on Oct 14, 2017 18:43:25 GMT -5
{ oh yeah, ѕρσттεdѕнιммεя did you want me to start something for shuu/katashi, or did you plan to? it doesn't matter to me either way but just know my starter probably won't be huge unless inspiration hits me ahaha my muse has been bleh today x-x } Minami said nothing at Yuki’s nervous apologies, only glaring sullenly at him, as if she expected him to have just known she was there and what was going on. The potential dangers of the situation had yet to sink into her head. Yes, it was nearly pitch-black in here, and yes, this was definitely a decrepit classroom. But…she was mostly just confused, and the annoyance of it all helped to block out the fear.
She stepped back as she noticed Yuki begin to haul himself over the desks. Then a suspicious creak sounded under the additional weight…she took another uncertain step backward, eyeing the floor boards. Decrepit was right…it sounded like they’d give any second. Was he going to fall through? How far would he go down..? Not that Minami wanted to see him fall, though the notion of him doing so in a mission to reach her struck her as poetically heroic, but she was just curious about the building’s depth and layout.
Fortunately, her question went unanswered and Yuki successfully made it to her side. The other boy, Hiro, soon followed suit.
“I’m fine,” she said, curtly, dismissing Yuki’s attempts to look her over. “Just wish somebody knew what was going on around here… Do you know guys know where the others are at least? Have you tried texting them?” Without waiting for an answer and feeling that would’ve been the obvious thing to do in the first place, she pulled out her cellphone. The screen lit up her face, albeit in a slightly eerie way, and she scrolled through her messages until she found Shuu.
Where are you???
Minami hit send and then…she finally noticed the fact that there was no reception in this place. Ugh, are you kidding me? “…Never mind, no service. That figures…”
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Post by 𝚌𝚊𝚛'𝚊'𝚌𝚊𝚛𝚗 on Oct 14, 2017 18:52:36 GMT -5
welcome back ~
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