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Post by potatowolfanimator on Aug 29, 2022 9:11:51 GMT -5
A Clan Within A Clan
By PotatoWolfAnimator
Inspired by Erin Hunter
Chapter 1
Frostkit woke up to the loud mewling of the new kits. She wanted to stretch but, the nursery was too crowded for that. Sneaking a glance at her mother, Morningsong, Frostkit silently snuck out of the entrance. Pausing she squinted in the bright morning light. Once her eyes adjusted, she bounded over to the apprentice’s den and peeked inside. Frostkit turned away in disappointment when she saw that all the nests were empty. “Frostkit,” said a familiar voice with exasperation. Frostkit turned to see the cat who called her, although she didn’t need to look to see who it was. Frostkit already knew that it was Morningsong coming to chase her back into the nursery. She could almost hear the “How many times do I have to tell you to stay in the nest until give you permission to leave” speech. Morningsong padded up to her shaking her head and sighing. “I’m almost going to miss looking for you when you leave” Frostkit was confused. “Where am I going?” she asked. Morningsong blinked. “I never told you yet?” Frostkit’s confusion vanished, and she started to get excited. “Told me what?” her mew was high with hope. The deputy Heroncall padded over. “Are you telling her?” she asked. “Tell me! Tell me!” Frostkit could wait no longer for the answer. Morningsong purred. “Today you will become an apprentice.”
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Post by phantomstar57 on Aug 29, 2022 13:17:15 GMT -5
A Clan Within A Clan By PotatoWolfAnimator Inspired by Erin Hunter Chapter 1 Frostkit woke up to the loud mewling of the new kits. She wanted to stretch but, the nursery was too crowded for that. Sneaking a glance at her mother, Morningsong, Frostkit silently snuck out of the entrance. Pausing she squinted in the bright morning light. Once her eyes adjusted, she bounded over to the apprentice’s den and peeked inside. Frostkit turned away in disappointment when she saw that all the nests were empty. “Frostkit,” said a familiar voice with exasperation. Frostkit turned to see the cat who called her, although she didn’t need to look to see who it was. Frostkit already knew that it was Morningsong coming to chase her back into the nursery. She could almost hear the “How many times do I have to tell you to stay in the nest until give you permission to leave” speech. Morningsong padded up to her shaking her head and sighing. “I’m almost going to miss looking for you when you leave” Frostkit was confused. “Where am I going?” she asked. Morningsong blinked. “I never told you yet?” Frostkit’s confusion vanished, and she started to get excited. “Told me what?” her mew was high with hope. The deputy Heroncall padded over. “Are you telling her?” she asked. “Tell me! Tell me!” Frostkit could wait no longer for the answer. Morningsong purred. “Today you will become an apprentice.” Good start! But it is hard to tell who is speaking sometimes. Always paragraph with a new speaker, like so:
Frostkit woke up to the loud mewling of the new kits. She wanted to stretch but, the nursery was too crowded for that. Sneaking a glance at her mother, Morningsong, Frostkit silently snuck out of the entrance. Pausing she squinted in the bright morning light. Once her eyes adjusted, she bounded over to the apprentice’s den and peeked inside. Frostkit turned away in disappointment when she saw that all the nests were empty.
“Frostkit,” said a familiar voice with exasperation. Frostkit turned to see the cat who called her, although she didn’t need to look to see who it was. Frostkit already knew that it was Morningsong coming to chase her back into the nursery. She could almost hear the “How many times do I have to tell you to stay in the nest until give you permission to leave” speech.
Morningsong padded up to her shaking her head and sighing. “I’m almost going to miss looking for you when you leave”
Frostkit was confused. “Where am I going?” she asked.
Morningsong blinked. “I never told you yet?”
Frostkit’s confusion vanished, and she started to get excited. “Told me what?” her mew was high with hope.
The deputy Heroncall padded over. “Are you telling her?” she asked.
“Tell me! Tell me!” Frostkit could wait no longer for the answer.
Morningsong purred. “Today you will become an apprentice.”
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Post by Deleted on Aug 29, 2022 20:53:41 GMT -5
This looks good so far!
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