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Post by ®Hawkpath® on Nov 26, 2021 1:46:03 GMT -5
A feast had probably been an exaggeration. By noble standards, at least, a feat wouldn’t be possible with what they had. Or smart, even if he thought he could pull it off somehow. Even looking someone in the eye could draw attention to him in this place. Stealing food would not only anger the guards, but tempt to other prisoners. He doubted there were many here who would care what became of him as long as they got some of the food. Alone, he might have tried it anyway. But he wasn’t going to get Mare killed, and he wasn’t going to get this kid killed, either. “A feast of sorts,” he amended. “Enough food to be worth eating, anyhow. Never mind where, the point is that the offer exists, and it won’t expire.” He was betting on Nico needing some time to decide. In fact, he was counting on it.
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Post by ®Hawkpath® on Nov 26, 2021 2:06:12 GMT -5
Living on the streets had taught Sal that the skaa could be violent, too. Even the Survivor…what he did counted as violence, didn’t it? And how many crewleaders were successful only because they were ruthless? But it was different. He believed it was different, because…because the nobility had the ability to change the way the world worked, and they didn’t. Because they had power and they weren’t afraid for their lives all the time and they didn’t have to make the skaa desperate, but they did. They had created the problem. The skaa weren’t perfect, he knew. But he couldn’t help feeling that they were better, anyway. Zuko made that harder to believe as fiercely. Zuko seemed…well. He didn’t seem like he was in a very different position than any of the skaa children Sal had met in his life. Maybe it was an illusion, maybe it was Sal not wanting to look into this boy’s eyes and see only an enemy, but Zuko seemed desperate, too. He needed to stop thinking about it. He would just confuse himself and do something stupid, probably. “Oh, they…no,” he said finally, shifting a little in place. “He was noble, so it didn’t really matter to anyone, I guess. It took days for anyone to move her body.” He cleared his throat, shoving the emotion roughly away from where it had begun to gather. “So, anyway, do you have any twos?”
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Transgender
strider
No mourners, no funerals
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Post by strider on Nov 26, 2021 2:20:19 GMT -5
“You make an awful lot of promises for someone in a situation where nothing is certain,” Nico said after a moment, arms crossing. There was something… almost enticing about it. Like Kelsier might be able to break the chains of Hathsin must by saying he could. Just by acting as though a place like this wasn’t capable of bringing him down. Nico knew the truth – Hathsin was going to break them all eventually, if they didn’t die first – but he wanted to believe in Kelsier’s indomitable spirit. “Seriously, though. Where are you going to get enough food that’s worth eating?” His brows raised, but he couldn’t hide the hunger in his voice. He wanted food, more than he had ever wanted it before. He hadn’t even been here very long, but already his ribs were starting to show through his skin. He was noble. He had been spoiled with weeks of as much food as he could eat (though it had made him sick, at first, transitioning from the bland and rare Skaa fare to the decadent, plentiful noble food).
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strider
No mourners, no funerals
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Post by strider on Nov 26, 2021 2:27:30 GMT -5
Anger flashed through Zuko, the expression painting his face for a long moment before he managed to push it down. None of this was fair. Once upon a time, Zuko had believed in fairness. Once upon a time, his mother had tried to teach him that the Skaa were deserving of respect, too. That they were people, and that they were just trying to get through their lives the same as everyone else. Once upon a time, he had tried to make friends with the kitchen staff before his father had shut him down. Once upon a time, Zuko had stood up for a group of Skaa that his father wanted to make an example of. Once upon a time, Zuko’s face had been unscarred. He hadn’t ever started to believe that the way the Skaa were treated was fair. He hadn’t started to believe that they deserved the way they were killed brutally. He just… thought that the nobility weren’t all bad. Or maybe, if they were, then the Skaa were all bad, too. Humanity wasn’t good. It didn’t make an effort for good things to happen. It was the nobility that kept the Skaa suffering, but if the Skaa had their way, it would be the nobility suffering instead. There was no world in which one group wouldn’t abuse their power over the other. In Zuko’s eyes, power was synonymous with abuse. “Do you know who it was?” Zuko asked after a moment, not looking away from Sal. It was important, though he didn’t quite know why. Even if Sal never knew it was him… he could avenge Sal’s mother for him. He could do what nobody else had been able to. What nobody else had cared to do. Maybe… maybe he could do things both ways. He didn’t want to kill nobility the way the Survivor did, but if he could teach a lesson to the ones who deliberately hurt Skaa… that would be a start.
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Post by ®Hawkpath® on Nov 26, 2021 2:35:27 GMT -5
“Nothing is certain no matter where you are,” Kelsier said. “If I only made promises that were impossible to break, I would never make any at all. But that’s what makes them mean something.” He thought about dismissing the question. It would be more fun not to have anyone know what he was doing until he showed up with more than his fair share of food, with a glaring lack of angry people chasing after him. But something told him that would take a little more trust than Nico would be able to muster up just yet. “You’re not going to just take my word for it, are you?” He asked, but he didn’t wait for an answer. “I’m going to trade someone for it. There’s only one thing more valuable than food in this place. Maybe it won’t be the best feast you’ve ever had, but quantity over quality isn’t always a bad thing.”
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Transgender
strider
No mourners, no funerals
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Post by strider on Nov 26, 2021 2:41:11 GMT -5
That more than anything cemented in Nico’s certainty that Kelsier was insane. A geode was a precious commodity. Nico may have just done something stupid by giving one away, but he had done it for a reason. He had done it as a way to repay the life Kelsier had saved. It may not have been necessary, but that didn’t mean that Nico’s conscience didn’t necessitate it. He wasn’t going to let this place turn him into a bad person. It was going to, eventually, but he could fight it for as long as possible. That was different from trading away a life just to get more food. Just to make a kid feel a little bit fuller. “You’re insane,” he said for good measure, but he didn’t actually argue. Kelsier could do whatever he wanted, though… it was an extreme length to go just to earn Nico’s trust. Which made Nico think there was probably something more to it. “You don’t get anything out of keeping me alive,” he said suddenly, staring at the ground. “I’m here because my father doesn’t care if I live or die. Keeping me alive isn’t going to earn you any favors.”
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Post by ®Hawkpath® on Nov 26, 2021 3:02:58 GMT -5
Something settled in Kelsier at the words, though it wasn’t Dox or Mare or Marsh or even Trap speaking them this time. Being told he was insane seemed to do that, somehow. It made him feel right about what he was doing. The plan was insane, to be fair. The idea that he could do the impossible was already foolish. To be confident that he could make it twice as hard and still be perfectly fine? That was another level entirely. But Nico couldn’t know what Kelsier knew. He was so young…did he know that he was about as likely to die of hunger as he was anything else? Did he know that those cuts lacing his arms could kill him twice as easily, if he wasn’t nourished enough to fight it? It would be worth it. And it was something he could do. He smiled. “Who said it was for you?” He asked, arching an eyebrow at him. “I said we could have a feast. It’s not as though I won’t be eating any of it, myself.”
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Post by ®Hawkpath® on Nov 26, 2021 3:26:32 GMT -5
Kelsier dipped his head, hiding the satisfaction at the reply. Nico could protest all he wanted that trusting him was stupid, but every time he did, he made it clearer that it was worth doing. If he was trying to manipulate Kelsier somehow, or stab him in the back, he wouldn’t be fighting the idea so hard. He probably would have suggested it himself, even. He didn’t say it, but he also didn’t think it mattered. If Nico tried to attack, Kelsier was fairly certain he knew who would win. “I have better ways of surviving than that,” he replied, and his eyes were serious as he looked up again. “I’m not trying to use you. And the choice is still yours.”
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Post by ®Hawkpath® on Nov 26, 2021 3:45:34 GMT -5
Kelsier knew trust was hard. He knew it was risky…you couldn’t just trust everyone, or you’d cause more damage than you could imagine. But you couldn’t trust no one, either. How did you tell? Kelsier knew he probably wasn’t the best person to teach that particular lesson, just now, though the thought stung too much for him to let it stay. He still didn’t know for sure that it had been her. He couldn’t know that for sure. Kelsier paused, shaken from his musings by Nico’s words. “Noble?” He repeated, blinking at the kid for a moment as he tried to make that fit. It was as though Nico had suddenly and calmly said he wasn’t actually human.
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Post by ®Hawkpath® on Nov 27, 2021 0:26:10 GMT -5
Sal hesitated, going very still as he looked at Zuko. As he caught the anger flashing through his eyes, because…for what? For Sal’s mother? What did he care, for a woman he’d never even met? What did he care, for the life of one skaa and her family? What right did he have to act like he cared while at the same time he was trying his best to take away hope? Sal expected to feel anger at that thought, but he couldn’t summon any. Zuko wasn’t responsible for what had happened. He hadn’t been there, and he hadn’t even known, until now. Sal looked away. Whether humanity was good at heart or not, it didn’t matter. He knew he wasn’t cruel, himself. At least…he made an effort not to be. He didn’t hurt people for the hell of it, like the noblemen did, and apparently he couldn’t even kill when it seemed like the best option. The point was, he couldn’t be the only one who didn’t want to hurt people. He couldn’t be the one semi decent person in the world. He just hadn’t expected the other one to be noble. He blinked, eyes wide as he looked up again. He met Zuko’s gaze, startled by the intensity there, though he didn’t say so. It took him a long moment to say anything at all. “I don’t know,” he managed at last. He hadn’t really expected Zuko to care, he discovered. “I don’t think she knew him or anything. I bothered him, and he sent his dog after me, and she got in the way. It didn’t matter to him.”
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Transgender
strider
No mourners, no funerals
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Post by strider on Nov 27, 2021 1:16:05 GMT -5
When Zuko had been young, he hadn’t known how cruel the nobility could be towards the Skaa. He didn’t know there were Skaa children killed for crimes as frivolous as being annoying. He didn’t know how hard it was to grow up a Skaa child. He didn’t know their life expectancy was probably somewhere below ten years. He had learned that since he’d been banished. He had seen too many Skaa children killed right in front of him. He had been helpless to do anything, though he had wanted to intercede. He had wanted to help, wanted to stop the slaughter from happening, but… he wasn’t powerful. He had no way to stop it. He had only saved one Skaa child since being banished. He tried to tell himself it didn’t matter, that he would be able to save more of them when he ended up in power, but it was sickening to see. His feelings about it never changed. He had originally thought that his father must not know that the slaughter was happening, but he had quickly learned that not only did his father know about it, he was at the head of it. Disillusionment was a long process. Zuko didn’t hate his father yet. He didn’t believe that the Lord Ruler couldn’t be fair. He realized now, though, that things weren’t as simple and perfect as he had once assumed. It made his blood boil, but there was very little he could do. Sitting here, hearing Sal’s version of the same story every Skaa probably had… this was something he could do. He could hunt down that nobleman. He could teach them a lesson. He… he didn’t think he would kill him; he wasn’t sure he had it in him, but he wasn’t going to go easy on him, either. “What did he look like?” Zuko asked, the intensity in his eyes not wavering for even a moment.
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Post by ®Hawkpath® on Nov 28, 2021 23:25:14 GMT -5
Sal hadn’t known at first, either, though he had learned earlier than Zuko had. He had grown up in it…he had learned to be careful and quiet, because being caught was something you couldn’t come back from. He had learned to not let hunger break him, to not let it slow him down, because when were you ever not hungry? Eventually, there was no longer a point in crying from it. So you learned not to mind it so much, even if food was never far from your thoughts. Sal knew he’d had it easier than plenty of other kids his age, though. He was used to it. It was just how things were, at least until the Survivor could make it better. He didn’t know why he felt the most at home he had in a long time with the same boy who threatened to take that away, too. He looked at Zuko for a long moment, his eyes searching, the intensity he found there scorching him. Because there was only one real reason Zuko would want to know about that man, and it didn’t make sense. Sal may have tried his best to remember, he may have struggled to keep their two faces clear in his head, one to protect and one to be protected against, but Zuko… Hadn’t anyone ever told him not to care? “There’s no point in trying to track him down,” he said finally, his voice softer than he expected it to be. “He…probably doesn’t even remember it. It changed my life forever, and it ended hers, but for him, it was just…like dinner was half an hour late or something. We’re just Skaa, Zuko. We’re disposable.” He wasn’t bitter towards Zuko, not for this. He just wasn’t sure what it was he was meant to be feeling instead. Especially with him almost seeming angry about what had happened… “He had curly reddish hair, though,” he added quietly. He wasn’t sure why, when he meant everything he’d said. Not that he thought he was disposable. But that they - noblemen, all of them as far as Sal knew - they did. “And kind of a…thin face and really cold blue eyes, I guess.”
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Transgender
strider
No mourners, no funerals
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Post by strider on Nov 30, 2021 3:23:02 GMT -5
Zuko didn’t want to take hope away from the Skaa. He wasn’t sure they had any reason to hope, but that didn’t mean he wanted to deprive them of it. He was only alive because of hope. Because his uncle had told him that he would find his path, that he would regain his honor… he had hope that he would be able to return home. He was a changed person, now. He knew what the world was like, and though he wished he had never been turned out at all, he found there were things he wanted to change if he were ever handed the throne. Which meant he had to convince his father that he was worthy of it, eventually. Despite not being Mistborn. Despite not being a full Feruchemist. He bit back the thoughts that threatened to overwhelm him. He didn’t want to be the Skaa’s only hope, but he couldn’t let the world devolve into chaos and civil war. There needed to be a clean transfer of power to someone who would make the necessary changes. That, and Zuko wasn’t sure he wanted his father dead, even after everything. His father was supposed to be a good man. If he wasn’t… then the very foundation of everything Zuko believed would fall through. He couldn’t fix the whole world right now, but he could possibly help the boy in front of him. “I don’t care whether he remembers it or not,” Zuko replied, voice hot. He hoped it was clear the anger wasn’t directed at Sal. “It matters. And… dammit. Dammit Fisher, whoever decided that the Skaa were disposable was wrong!” He didn’t mean to shout the words, but they came out before he could even detect the change in his own volume. He fell silent, jaw clenched as he listened to Sal’s description. There were any number of nobles that Sal could be referring to. It didn’t matter. Zuko would find the right one, even if it took him a year. “I don’t have any way to prove whether there’s really a difference between noble and Skaa,” Zuko said, voice quiet, “But even if there is, there’s no reason you should just… be slaughtered like that. I don’t…” I don’t care if saying so is treason. He couldn’t say that. Not out loud, not yet. “You asked for a two? Draw a card.”
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Post by ®Hawkpath® on Nov 30, 2021 3:38:13 GMT -5
Sal didn’t know where Zuko was from, or he might have been more afraid than he was now. Zuko was noble, which meant he had more power than Sal could imagine, but…it didn’t mean anything right now. He could have backup, but if he did, they’d have come for him by now, wouldn’t they? And why would he have wasted his time with Sal if he had others working for him? There was no chance of Sal knowing all the details. He wished he could know more, but…it wasn’t possible, unless Zuko started being a lot freer with his information all of a sudden. Somehow, Sal doubted that was going to happen. He wasn’t sure what he believed in. He thought he believed in the Survivor…he had to, didn’t he? He wouldn’t give up, and that was the only other option. The Survivor would succeed, or everything would be lost and they’d never get out of this. But it was a belief fueled by fear and longing more than anything else. He watched Zuko, eyes wide as he continued. As he seemed…almost angrier than Sal himself was, somehow. He couldn’t hide the shock in his eyes. He couldn’t pretend that it didn’t send lightning shooting through his veins, freezing him in place. Who the hell was this nobleman? “You should keep an eye on that kind of thinking, Zuko,” he managed at last, the cards limp in his hands, though he managed not to drop them. “You could get in trouble with dangerous ideas like that.” He drew a card, but he didn’t look away from Zuko. If he’d thought he was trapped before…it was worse now. Much worse. Now he wasn’t sure how he’d walk away, even after Zuko healed.
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Transgender
strider
No mourners, no funerals
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Post by strider on Nov 30, 2021 4:05:36 GMT -5
Zuko looked away, feigning reorganizing his cards just so he didn’t have to look at Sal. The world was complicated. Skaa weren’t what he had been told they were. Neither were the nobility. Their ancestors may have been his father’s treasured and trusted friends, but now they were just… people who had been given everything on a silver platter and had never had to work for anything in their life. People who thought they were special just because they were told they were. People who were drunk on power that they had done nothing to earn. If Zuko made it back… if he reclaimed his honor and took a seat on the throne… would he have earned it? No, he thought, not really. The only reason he deserved the throne was because he was the only way to stop a civil war. The nobility would accept him because of his blood. The Skaa would accept him when they learned what he was doing. When they learned that he was going to try to help them. He couldn’t help the way Sal’s words flung themselves through his thoughts, tumbling over each other again and again and again. It hurt that Sal was right. It hurt that it was exactly that kind of thinking that had gotten Zuko here in the first place. If he hadn’t tried to spare a few dozen Skaa, then he would still be at home learning how to follow in his father’s footsteps. For the first time, a sick feeling churned in his stomach at that thought. He didn’t want to be his father. And for some reason, he was beginning to think that he’d almost rather be here. “Too late for that,” Zuko replied, his voice just a little bit too light. He had already gotten in trouble. There wasn’t much more that could be done to him unless his father decided that it would be easiest to just… rid the world of him for wanting other people to live. It wasn’t the sort of information that he was just going to volunteer to Sal, but the other boy had hit the nail on the head. This kind of thinking was dangerous. It would just take more than a ruined face for Zuko to stop believing that Skaa lives had value. Even if he tried to believe he didn’t think that anymore. “Do you have a six?”
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Post by ®Hawkpath® on Dec 16, 2021 23:45:00 GMT -5
Sal didn’t know what he’d meant, exactly. He had said it because it was true, yes, but he’d said it because he didn’t know what else to say, too. He’d said it because Zuko wasn’t supposed to think that way. Because even if he was lying, didn’t that mean he thought Sal was important enough to lie to? It was a low bar, perhaps, but it was miles above the one Sal was used to. He knew it was probably easy for the nobility to turn a blind eye and think it wasn’t all that bad, really, but… He hadn’t thought that any could really change their minds. He hadn’t thought they could really see him as a person. He shook his head. Zuko could be playing him, he reminded himself firmly. He still had the information he needed. He still wasn’t going to give it. Even if a part of him didn’t want to let the conversation slip away just yet. Zuko had surprised him so many times today already. He eyed him for a long moment. Then he glanced down, shuffling through his cards. “No, draw one.” He replied, his voice still quiet. “Do you have a…I don’t know. Seven?”
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Transgender
strider
No mourners, no funerals
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Post by strider on Dec 17, 2021 13:52:45 GMT -5
Zuko hadn’t ever practiced lying. He knew he was worse at it than Azula, but that wasn’t really saying anything. Everyone was worse at lying than Azula. The point was, he wasn’t sure how much he could get away with when it came to lying, and he wasn’t going to risk doing it now. Not when Sal was still the only person he knew of who had the information he needed. He knew that, if Azula were in his place, she might have actually tried to become the other boy’s friend to get the information from him. Zuko doubted he could pull that off, even if he was trying. The point was… he wasn’t trying. He was just… he supposed he was balancing on a very narrow, very dangerous line. If he liked Sal too much, he couldn’t get the information he needed. But he did like Sal. The Skaa weren’t treated the way Zuko had been told when he was younger. The treatment was far crueler, and Zuko hadn’t ever seen them do anything to deserve it. He couldn’t just accept that they deserved this treatment because of who their ancestors were. He knew firsthand that his father liked to play favorites. If he could do that with his children, couldn’t he do that with the rest of the world, too? Couldn’t he reward the people who were more deserving in his eyes and punish everyone else? Of course, acknowledging that the Skaa’s ancestors didn’t deserve it either meant he would have to come to terms with the fact that he didn’t deserve the punishment he was still bearing, but… he wasn’t ready for that. But the Skaa didn’t deserve it, even if their ancestors had. “Nope,” he said after a moment, shrugging. “Draw one. What about… a mistwraith?”
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Post by ®Hawkpath® on Dec 21, 2021 3:28:03 GMT -5
“Right,” Orpheus returned, forcing himself to lay back down. It was easy enough to forget he was injured, though his head was spinning. Perhaps it was because the Skaa spent most of their lives denying injuries. They pretended that they were unharmed, because being injured meant you couldn’t work. It meant you were weak. It meant you were left to die, even if the injury itself hadn’t been fatal. Lord Wammy was different. L… L was very, very different. Orpheus didn’t have the words for what L was. “How… do I stop my thoughts?” Orpheus asked rather bewildered by the idea. He didn’t know how to stop his thoughts. He didn’t know how to make himself think of something else. Something less… huge.If it surprised Orpheus that L was good at lying, he didn’t give any indication of it. He figured that may have been rude. “I’ve… never had time to do nothing,” Orpheus admitted after a long moment. “Are there less taxing tasks I can help with until I have recovered?” “Have you ever stopped your thoughts before?” L asked, intrigued. “I suppose it takes practice. It’s not always possible, but usually, you merely find something else you’re already thinking about, and refocus your attention onto it. Of course, with your concussion, you might not be able to. But it’s best to try.” He considered, leaning back a little. Less taxing things…L didn’t know how taxing most of the work was. He didn’t like doing it, so he didn’t do it. The things he did like doing were taxing, but he preferred that to boredom. He didn’t really know about pastimes that weren’t taxing. “Some people find it relaxing to talk about other people,” he offered finally, thinking of the balls he’d been to.
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Transgender
strider
No mourners, no funerals
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Post by strider on Dec 21, 2021 4:17:28 GMT -5
“Pretty sure that’s called gossip,” Orpheus replied, frowning just a little bit at L, “and most of it’s wrong, anyway, if what I’ve heard is right. People… really like trying to ruin each other’s reputations, don’t they?” He had never understood gossip in noble houses and noble courts. He had heard about it happening, though he had never seen it in person. He had never been to a noble function though, so he had a feeling L would know better than he did. The Skaa just didn’t have time to talk about other people, even if they wanted to. Especially because they could be heard at any time, and if they said the wrong thing, they could be killed. The only gossip Orpheus knew was about which noble houses were kinder to their Skaa than others. Somehow, he doubted that was something L would be interested in at all. “Do… you find it relaxing?” he asked after a moment, realizing he may have just disparaged one of L’s favorite past times. He was noble, after all.
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Post by ®Hawkpath® on Dec 26, 2021 21:05:21 GMT -5
Sal knew this was dangerous. He knew he was making it more dangerous by talking to Zuko, when he could have just dealt with the loneliness and boredom and waited for him to heal. The problem was that, when he healed, Sal would need to let him go somehow. He didn’t like thinking about that…not when he knew Zuko could easily take advantage of it. Maybe he could get away, but it wouldn’t be hard for Zuko to just grab onto him the moment he was untied. He’d be rested then, too, and fed, and ready to switch places with his capture. But there was nothing he could do about that right now. He pulled his thoughts away from it. He didn’t know what to think about Zuko. It was disorienting to talk to him, like he could be a friend, when they both knew he never would be. “Uh…mistwraith. No, draw one,” he replied, focusing on the cards instead. At least he understood those. At least he didn’t have to make sure they weren’t trying to trick him into saying something he shouldn’t.
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Transgender
strider
No mourners, no funerals
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Post by strider on Dec 27, 2021 2:41:31 GMT -5
Skaa and noble weren’t supposed to be friends. Zuko had learned that lesson early on. His mother hadn’t liked the fact that she had to teach it to him, but she had taught it to him anyway. It was the kind of lesson that might be enough to save his life. Skaa and noblemen didn’t mix. Proper nobility stayed out of the Skaa’s way as they went about their daily work, and the Skaa spoke to the nobility only when they had to. That was what Zuko had been taught, at least. It had taken him much longer to realize that most noblemen, including his own father, weren’t respectful to the Skaa at all. He had tried to change his attitude and behavior to better fit his father’s expectations, but it turned out he hadn’t learned to scorn the Skaa soon enough. Now, though, he was glad he hadn’t. The Skaa were people, too. They were the only reason Zuko was so determined to get back. He wanted to go home, of course, he wanted the luxuries he had been missing out on for the past several months, but more than anything he wanted to guarantee himself the throne so he could do something to help the Skaa and stop the endless bloodshed. “Damn,” Zuko replied, trying to make it sound like his reaction was only to the card game. It described, however, the whole situation they both had found themselves in. They were never going to agree.
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Post by ®Hawkpath® on Jan 5, 2022 15:17:31 GMT -5
It seemed their mothers had been similar in more ways than one. Sal’s hadn’t wanted to teach him that he had to show respect and deference to noblemen, no matter the circumstances. She hadn’t wanted to tell him that they were better than he was, that they deserved more, than there was nothing worse than the crime of looking one of them in the eye for an instant too long. But she had done it. Because if she hadn’t… Well. It hadn’t mattered, in the end. But she had tried her best, and Sal would always wonder how much of it she had believed, deep down. Whether she’d thought the Lord Ruler was their god, or whether she’d just said what she knew she had to. Sal didn’t think he believed they were better, or that they deserved more. Not in any rational, objective way. He fought them in every way he could, though he’d never intended to do it quite as dangerously as he was now. But sometimes, now and then, when he wasn’t paying attention to it, it would slip into his thoughts anyway. He lowered his cards slowly. Then he set them down and leaned back a little bit. “Damn,” he echoed, quietly. It seemed like an accurate enough descriptor for whatever this was supposed to be.
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Transgender
strider
No mourners, no funerals
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Post by strider on Jan 20, 2022 14:20:26 GMT -5
It would have been so much easier if the world was the way Zuko had been taught it was. If the Skaa really were lesser than the nobility, if there weren’t as many similarities between them as there seemed to be. If both Sal and Zuko hadn’t had mothers who worried about them and tried to keep them alive as long as possible, if they hadn’t had mothers who had sacrificed themselves so their sons could live… Zuko shifted uncomfortably, wishing this could just be a card game. Wishing they could avoid finding the ways their lives were similar. Zuko’s attention shifted back towards the cards, knowing he could play, knowing they could just continue the game, but it didn’t feel so much like a game anymore. It didn’t feel like something they were just doing to pass the time until they could continue their life like this hadn’t happened. He frowned slightly, letting the cards lay down on his lap as he stared at his leg. If Sal hadn’t picked him up and carried him here, he would have died. He would have been targeted by the same noblemen he had once been part of. The same noblemen he wanted to return to. Zuko’s words turned to acid in his throat, and he swallowed them back down. There was nothing to say. There was no stopping the deadly feeling in his stomach that he now had more in common with Sal than he did the people he had grown up with. “I forfeit,” Zuko whispered, voice hoarse. “You’re winning anyway.”
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Post by ®Hawkpath® on Feb 3, 2022 22:52:04 GMT -5
And just like that, the game was over. It hadn’t been working, anyway. Sal had hoped it wouldn’t matter, but he couldn’t help it. It did matter. He stared at the floor. It didn’t change anything, he knew that. No matter what happened here, whatever Zuko thought of him, however real this was…the fact that their goals were directly in conflict wasn’t going to go away. Sal knew he’d die for his. He thought Zuko probably would, too, if it came to it, but what did he know? He didn’t know much about life as a nobleman, all he knew was that he’d always believed it was easy, and a part of him had always wondered if a single one of them ever felt bad about the things they did. He shouldn’t have tried to climb that building. If he hadn’t decided to take that risk, they would probably still be in the middle of their game, safe from whatever this was supposed to be. “I should probably go get food,” he said finally, moving to stand again. It was an excuse, and not his best, but the room felt abruptly claustrophobic to him.
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Transgender
strider
No mourners, no funerals
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Post by strider on Feb 4, 2022 5:47:14 GMT -5
-- Zuko was closer to being able to walk again. He had let Sal tie his hands again when he had left, and they had barely exchanged more than a few words since. It was like they were avoiding it because they knew if they talked too much, they would actually start to like each other. It was too late for Zuko. He did like Sal, which was going to make chasing him that much harder when he finally got out of here. He wasn’t entirely certain Sal was ever going to let him go, but… he had to eventually, didn’t he? Zuko had no idea what Sal’s plan was here. If he even had a plan or if he had just wanted to save Zuko because… because he was a good person? Because Zuko had spared him before? He had no idea what to make of Sal’s decision. The other boy was in the room now, though, and the silence was heavier than Zuko liked. It felt like a tangible thing, something that needed to be broken if they were both going to keep drawing breath. “I can probably stand enough now to show you how to fight.” His voice sounded harsh in the quiet of the room, hoarse from not speaking and roughened by uncertainty.
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Post by ®Hawkpath® on Feb 5, 2022 19:32:47 GMT -5
Sal had been trying to avoid Zuko, as much as he could. After the card game…he didn’t think it was because he didn’t want to talk to him again. Or it was, but not because he didn’t like him. He was a lot more worried about liking him. He couldn’t forget who they both were. Zuko was noble, even if he wasn’t living like one right now. He had, once. He had grown up that way, and it didn’t make any sense to imagine he would just stop thinking like a nobleman because he was here now. And Sal would never be someone the nobility cared about or respected. He wished he could believe that kind of change was possible, but if it was going to happen…wouldn’t it have happened by now? He could feel the silence, settling around him like a suffocating blanket over his head. But it wouldn’t kill him to live with it. He glanced up, startled as Zuko’s voice broke through the quiet, eye widening as he looked at him. “Oh…” he managed, his own voice edged with disuse, too. When was the last time he’d even talked out loud. He hesitated, looking down again. “Yeah…I don’t know that that’s such a good idea. No offense, but you’re…you.”
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Transgender
strider
No mourners, no funerals
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Post by strider on Feb 8, 2022 2:29:31 GMT -5
“You can’t just say ‘no offense’ before something and have it suddenly not be offensive,” Zuko retorted, trying to pretend he wasn’t hurt by Sal turning down his offer. It made sense. Sal was keeping the wall between them intact, and Zuko, despite his best efforts, kept unintentionally knocking out loose bricks. It made no sense for them to become close. It made no sense for Zuko to teach Sal how to fight. They were enemies. If Sal learned how to fight, he could very easily use those skills against Zuko. In fact, it would be incredibly foolish of him not to. “I didn’t know you believed that every nobleman was inexorably evil,” Zuko added suddenly, crossing his arms. It would be easier to keep the wall between them if Sal didn’t believe that Zuko could be anything but a nobleman. Zuko wanted to go home, of course, which meant he didn’t want to stop being noble, but he didn’t think being noble was synonymous with wanting Skaa to die. Clearly, Sal did. “Never mind,” Zuko breathed, staring daggers at the ground right underneath the swords. “It was a stupid idea anyway. It’s not like you need to be able to defend yourself.” The last bit was laced heavily with sarcasm, though he tried to push it back. It didn’t matter. He kept trying to tell himself it didn’t matter.
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