Transgender
strider
No mourners, no funerals
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Post by strider on Jan 9, 2021 2:09:32 GMT -5
Orpheus shot L a small smile at his obvious annoyance. It wasn’t a mean smile by any means, but it was a more competitive one than he would have given anyone else. He didn’t like being the reason L was losing, but… he wasn’t really. He wasn’t taking points away from L or causing his frog to fall into the water. He was just better at getting the frog all the way across. His eyes widened at L’s obvious alarm at the new frog. “Why would it eat the other frog?” he asked, tilting his head curiously. It didn’t quite make sense. “They’re both frogs. Humans don’t eat other humans. Usually.” If something looked like you, you didn’t eat it. Except, perhaps, when it was food that had been shaped like humans, but that was very rare. “I like it better that they’re friends,” he added, smiling at the sight of the one frog still sitting on top of the other in their safe little place at the top of the screen. How terrifying would it be, to be one of those frogs? Orpheus pushed the thought away. They were having fun, no need to empathize with frogs that were, he reminded himself for the last time, probably not sentient. “It wasn’t that much bigger,” he added softly, under his breath. An optimist and a realist. Although L, it seemed, sometimes bordered on pessimism. Was there really any difference between a pessimist and a realist? Orpheus tried not to think about that too hard. He watched as L made progress, gently squeezing his friend’s arm as the frog made it all the way to the other end. “Maybe it’s not so lonely,” he murmured, turning to face L. He needed to stop doing that when he was so close. He was going to have trouble keeping his thoughts to himself if he weren’t more careful. “There are five spots for frogs… maybe they’re waiting for their friends to join them so they can all hop off together. Maybe the sixth frog is just… a new friend.” Orpheus felt the way L nudged him back to his machine, but he didn’t move for a few moments, instead feeling L pressed just a little bit closer to him. He couldn’t hide his smile, couldn’t hide the way he searched L’s eyes, almost drowning in them. “Alright,” he murmured, turning his attention back to the game. He began to move the frog forward, stopping in between the road and the river. “Maybe… maybe if I wait, another friend will show up,” he explained, smiling at L. He didn’t look in his eyes this time. He knew he’d get distracted. And then the timer for that particular frog ran out, and something swooped from the other side of the screen and carried it off. Orpheus simply stared, dumbfounded, at the place where his frog had been. Luckily… luckily the other three (well, four, if you counted the third’s friend) were still safe.
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Post by ®Hawkpath® on Jan 9, 2021 2:49:12 GMT -5
L tried hard not to stare at Orpheus’ smile, because he knew that would just make it harder to do what he had to do. To keep up the deception, to play the game he needed to play. To keep Orpheus safe, at all costs. He just had to remember what he was doing this for, he had to remember the stakes. And he had to be convincing, or Orpheus wouldn’t play the game. “Some animals eat each other.” He explained, waving a hand dismissively. “Not usually humans, no, but other animals. Besides, this is a game, and it’s shown itself to be less than realistic. Anything is possible.” At least Orpheus seemed completely unaware of what was really happening so far. Sometimes, it was very fortunate that L could lie so well, sometimes he was glad he had that particular skill. And sometimes part of him wished he wasn’t quite so good at it. If he wasn’t, then he wouldn’t have to face his impending death without saying a word. He looked at Orpheus, staring into his eyes, considering his words. “Perhaps,” he agreed softly, his voice unable to more than barely a whisper when he was this close to Orpheus. “Perhaps you’re right. If they are friends, however, I feel bad for failing to save some of them.” It was almost a confession, but it was one he knew Orpheus wouldn’t understand. He looked at the game instead, trying to focus. They were very close. L stood still, breathing lightly, feeling his heart race treacherously in his chest. At least Orpheus wasn’t a vampire. Being secretly in love with a vampire would have been very difficult. Orpheus, however, had no way to know how fast his heart was beating unless he felt it, and hopefully, he wouldn’t think to do that. He couldn’t look away from him, he couldn’t move away, no, he don’t want to. He didn’t move back because he didn’t want to. He finally turned back to the game, a bit reluctantly. The longer he stalled, the longer his lived, after all. And the longer he got to have this time with Orpheus. His eyes widened in surprise as the thing suddenly took the frog away, and stared, then glanced quickly at his own machine, checking to make sure he was still losing. He was, thankfully. He did his best to look convincingly competitive as he glanced back At Orpheus, a small smile playing at the edges of his mouth. Then he turned back to his own machine, and he began to guide the frog across. Which….was promptly hit by a car. Whoops, he hadn’t even intended to do that, but at least the startled expression on his face ought to be genuine. “This game is….difficult.” He said, glancing at Orpheus, then the game.
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Transgender
strider
No mourners, no funerals
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Post by strider on Jan 9, 2021 3:21:37 GMT -5
“Well yes, some animals eat each other, but I can’t imagine, say… a deer eating another deer. Though… I suppose that’s not a good comparison, because deer eat plants. But frogs don’t eat meat! They just eat… I don’t know, bugs? I don’t know enough about this as I should,” Orpheus admitted, awkwardly scratching the back of his neck with his free hand. “Though you do make a good point that it’s not a very realistic game.” Orpheus gave a tiny smile, grateful that the hypothetical they were discussing hadn’t come to pass. Orpheus didn’t understand the confession. All he knew was the softness of L’s voice when his face was so very near Orpheus’ own, all he knew was the way Orpheus’ gaze flickered down to L’s lips for just a moment. A consideration. An urge he would never act on. An urge that would lose him his best friend. “If you’ll allow me just a touch more idealism,” Orpheus returned, forcing his gaze to meet L’s. They were, perhaps, closer than he’d intended, but he didn’t want to move away. His voice matched L’s whisper, the words soft and earnest, and, perhaps, just a touch higher than they would have been if he’d been standing a bit further away. “Perhaps each frog gets a few chances. We don’t… we don’t know that each frog is different. Maybe the ones that die come back, and… we get a few tries to let them meet their friends.” He knew it was unlikely, but there was absolutely nothing in the game that could prove him wrong. “Maybe death doesn’t count, here. Not in the same way.” He couldn’t look away. A hand almost reached up of its own volition, almost traced the line of L’s jaw, almost pulled him even closer until there was no air between them at all. He forced it back down. One moment of happiness was not worth a lifetime without L, even if he couldn’t have him the way he wished he could. Orpheus’ eyes searched L’s, wide and unblinking. He didn’t want to break this. Something in Orpheus fell just a little bit harder at the competitive smile L gave him. He didn’t even care that he had just lost a frog. “Not very much is difficult for you,” Orpheus murmured lightly, looking back at his own screen for just a moment. He pulled L just a little bit closer to his screen, removing a hand from L’s arm (though his left hand hadn’t yet let go of L’s right since they’d started playing) so he could take his own turn. He yelped as his own frog almost got hit by a car, but he managed to get out of its way at just the right time. “Ha,” he whispered softly against L as he hopped the frog into safety. “Four out of five.”
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Post by ®Hawkpath® on Jan 9, 2021 4:23:52 GMT -5
“Deer sometimes do eat carcasses.” L said immediately, the information leaping to the front of his brain. “They don’t hunt, but particularly when they’re low on other nutrients they will consume flesh they find. Forensic scientists once found a white tailed deer eating a human rib. So, technically, I suppose deer are actually omnivores.” He didn’t seem to realize that this was a possibly bad thing to just....say. This was, probably, the reason he was considered cold, even though he hadn’t said he wanted someone to get eaten by a deer or that he planned to use deer to dispose of evidence. He’d merely stated a relevant fact. He was so very close to Orpheus now. He stood still, looking at him, allowing him to have this. Just,,,for a few moments. Just in case he didn’t come back. If this was it…he swallowed back the words threatening to strangle him, and forced himself to remember how to breathe. No. He wouldn’t ever say those particular words in that particular order. That was one thing he could never allow himself to have. He didn’t look away, though. Orpheus’ voice was soft and it begged him to come just a little closer, to close the distance, to…he couldn’t think that way, not now that they were standing so close he could almost feel Orpheus’ heartbeat. What would happen if he reached forward and rested his hand on Orpheus’ chest, over his heart? Was it even faintly possible he would feel it matching his own? Was there even a shallow chance of Orpheus not moving away if he tried? He didn’t try. He just listened, his eyes softening as Orpheus spoke. The way he said it...L thought he probably would have believed anything Orpheus told him in that moment. He trusted him. And in that moment, he just let himself forget the danger, the game, the game he was playing that Orpheus didn’t even know about. To live in a world Orpheus had created...he would have given a great deal for that. “Perhaps.” His voice was so soft, so fragile. He was having trouble breathing properly. He held out a little longer. Believing what Orpheus said. Letting it comfort him. Another chance, right? To meet his friend? Then he let reality consume him again. One more life. One more. One more and it would be over. L wasn’t ready. Not that he ever would be. Not that he ever would be ready to die. He just wanted a little longer with Orpheus first. He just wanted this room to be safe, to be the fun, relaxing game Orpheus assumed it was. Or didn’t assume. Believed. Believed because of L. He needed to stop stalling before the House took action. He turned to the screen. His hands were steady as he moved the frog forward, his eyes focused, steady. And then the frog was dead. L turned, slowly, to look at Orpheus. His eyes searched, taking in every inch of his face, every detail he had memorized long ago. And then he smiled. I win.
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Transgender
strider
No mourners, no funerals
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Post by strider on Jan 9, 2021 13:08:31 GMT -5
Orpheus listened intently, tilting his head at the information. He hadn’t known that before. He didn’t understand why some people would use this situation as an example of L being cold. What he said was interesting, if not a little bit gruesome. “My point still stands,” Orpheus murmured softly, a smile flitting across his face. “Regardless of what deer eat, I doubt they would just kill and eat another deer just because it was a little bit smaller than them. I also don’t think it makes sense for a frog to do that.” He leaned a little bit more against L. “I suppose none of this even matters, because the game clearly is wrong. But have they really found deer eating human ribs?” It didn’t shock him as much as it could have. It was just the way life worked. When you died, your soul went to the Underworld, and your body, if it was done properly, was burned. Set free to exist among the gods. To fertilize the soil and do what good it could. If a body weren’t burned… well, it could do the same thing, just over a longer period of time. Orpheus didn’t like death. It was too long, too permanent, too heart wrenching. But what bothered him wasn’t what happened to the body. There was a strange sort of tension when he looked at L. Not an uncomfortable one by any means, but just… something. Something pulling him closer, whispering for him to do the things he would never allow himself to do. He held L’s gaze, searching for something in their depths that he almost thought he saw reflected back. It must have been a trick of the light. A tiny smile split across Orpheus’ face. A long moment where Orpheus and L existed in the same world, a brighter, more beautiful one, where people got second chances after they died. They both knew that world didn’t exist, but Orpheus hadn’t let himself stop fighting for it. L was there to clean up and push forward the world that already existed. Maybe, just maybe, the House would be kind. Not that Orpheus would ever find out. They were just frogs. A bunch of near-identical frogs. And then the tension melted away and L looked back at the game, and Orpheus watched him. Prepared for L to get another frog across. Prepared to see that triumphant smile, the one that bordered on arrogance but never actually got all the way there. The smile that could persuade Orpheus to do just about anything. The smile that would push him to be competitive, at least a little bit. That wasn’t what happened. L’s frog died again, and Orpheus found his brow creasing for just a moment until a GAME OVER flashed across L’s screen. Ah… so Orpheus had won. He pulled L just a little closer, his expression just a little bit cocky. As cocky as Orpheus could ever look, at least. Which was… not very. If Orpheus had known, he would have done the same thing. He would have memorized L’s face for the thousandth time, would have searched his eyes, tried to capture the spark there. But he didn’t know. What he did catch was the smile. That didn’t make much sense – Orpheus knew L hated to lose. Orpheus’ own smile melted off his face in moments. “I won,” he murmured, brow creasing and no small amount of fear leaking into his voice, “so why do you look like you did?”
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Post by ®Hawkpath® on Jan 9, 2021 13:09:33 GMT -5
“You do make a good point.” L had to admit, nodding a little. “Deer are not hunters. And while they would probably eat a carcass of one of their own kind, especially if they were desperate, they wouldn’t likely kill and eat one of their own for being smaller. Snakes, however, do eat their own kind when they’re smaller.” He looked at the screen, frowning a little. “I don’t know whether frogs are the same.” He admitted. He wasn’t really an expert on frogs. Then nodded as Orpheus continued. “Yes.” He confirmed. “They were studying how human remains decomposed in the wild, and one of the scavengers caught was a white tailed deer.” He shrugged. It wasn’t that surprising, really. L had experienced far too much death in his life. Whether Orpheus’ Underworld still existed for him, whether the gods still lived, he didn’t know. He had no idea what happened to the people who he’d failed, the people he’d directly caused the death of. Well….he might be about to find out. Was it the same when you died in th House? Was it different? The only times he’d died before, he hadn’t experienced anything but waking up, or in the case of the second arena room, merely appearing as though he’d blinked in. He hadn’t seen that death coming. At least he was prepared this time. L couldn’t help but feel it too. His heartbeat was so fast, his mind spinning, trying to stop him from doing something very stupid while his heart beckoned him forwards. He didn’t look away. To live in a world where you got another chance, where death wasn’t the terrible, permanent thing that it was...something he would have done a lot to get. He wished life were like that, he wished reality was kind, but it wasn’t. It was harsh and cold and unforgiving and L wanted to get lost in Orpheus’ gaze just a little bit longer before he returned to face it. Before he had to face the choice he’d made. If he could have believed Orpheus could ever feel the same, he might have seen it now. In the way they were standing so close, the way Orpheus looked back at him. But he didn’t believe it, so he wasn’t looking for it. He was just looking at Orpheus. GAME OVER. L looked at it for a long moment. He didn’t know what the House was planning to do to him exactly, but it was coming. Soon. He didn’t have much time to do much of anything now, he suspected, and he found himself staring at Orpheus, his expression falling, his attempt to hide the truth no longer needed. Instead his eyes were wide, his expression open and vulnerable and even scared. But he didn’t look away. And he didn’t stop smiling, his eyes betraying him. He wanted to remember that expression on Orpheus’ face forever….he wanted to remember the way he smiled, the way he brushed against L, the way he leaned on him a little, the feeling of his hands braiding L’s hair….he wanted to freeze this moment, and live in it forever. A moment happy, untouched by pain or grief. But the moment was gone before he had even finished thinking it. And Orpheus was looking at him, but the smile was gone. “Because I did.” The words were simple. L’s voice was calm, but his eyes burned, fear shining bright from behind them. He wasn’t ready to die. He wasn’t - And the House made its move. And the detective’s legs gave out. It wasn’t slow and graceful. It was sudden, a look of surprise passing through dark eyes. It was not having the time to so much as reach forward to steady himself, to reach for Orpheus. L Lawliet fell.
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Transgender
strider
No mourners, no funerals
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Post by strider on Jan 9, 2021 15:00:09 GMT -5
Because I did. Orpheus searched L’s expression, trying to find some sort of explanation, something to tell him what that meant, what game L had been playing that Orpheus hadn’t seen coming. L was a liar, Orpheus knew he was, he lied to people about who he was and what he wanted, but Orpheus didn’t think L had ever lied to him. It was only a matter of time. And of course. Of course he lied about this, of all things, because in addition to being a liar, L was also the best damn man Orpheus had ever met. He searched that expression, gaze stopping at the smile, because it didn’t fit. The fear… Orpheus didn’t know what was coming, but he knew it was bad. And yet he was smiling because… because what? Because there were consequences to losing? Orpheus was on the ground before L was, cushioning his fall and cradling his head close to his chest. There were questions and accusations burning in Opheus’ chest, but he pushed them all away. L knew what he had done. He had to know what it would do to Orpheus. He had to have made this decision for a reason, because it had been a decision. Orpheus didn’t understand why, not when L had people to save, a job to keep doing, people in his world (well, a person in his world) who cared about him… Orpheus had none of that. He was alone, a wanderer, never settling down anywhere, never doing anything important, because he’d failed the one thing he had tried to do right. “Hey,” he murmured softly, brushing L’s hair back from his face. Did it hurt? Was it fixable? Orpheus couldn’t tell, all he could do was hold L and hum softly and rock back and forth like that would make any difference at all. Like he didn’t hate L for choosing this, for taking this when there was probably a way out of it, for lying. Orpheus didn’t care if there wasn’t a way to avoid one of them dying, he would have found a way, because that was what he dealt with anyway. The impossible. “Stay with me, Λ. Please.” His voice was tight and high, emotions closing his throat and forcing his voice into scarcely more than a whisper. His cheeks were wet, but he didn’t bother wiping them off, he didn’t have a hand to spare. No. No, this was not happening, because L was not one of those stupid identical frogs, he was a person and Orpheus loved him and if he lost one more person he loved… a choked sob broke through, but he tried to hide it, tried to hide the way he was trembling, because L didn’t deserve to die remembering nothing but Orpheus’ grief. “I’ve saved you before, remember?” he murmured, voice barely audible, “so tell me how to do it again, yeah? Tell me how to save you.”
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Post by ®Hawkpath® on Jan 9, 2021 15:34:48 GMT -5
It happened fast, falling. One second he was standing, staring into Orpheus’ shocked, confused eyes and his own expression was a strange mix of satisfied and calm and scared and apologetic. Then he was on the floor, blinking in surprise, his eyes so wide as he looked up at Orpheus, the smile gone, replaced with confusion and terror he couldn’t hide. His body was limp, his head resting close to Orpheus’ chest...so close he could hear the other man’s heartbeat. He tried to turn towards it. His muscles failed to respond, and he stopped trying after a moment, instead just looking at Orpheus, listening to him speak. He knew what he had done, yes. What he didn’t know what exactly how much it would hurt Orpheus. He knew it would hurt, he knew it wouldn’t be comfortable, but he also knew Orpheus would be okay in the end, even if he didn’t come back. And laying there, Orpheus cradling his limp body, his eyes staring up and unblinking? He forgot this was the House, he forgot that there was a high probability of his return, he forgot everything but the feeling of death. Humans were built to survive. Humans were built to survive, and the clinical part of his brain was calmly informing him of all the things shutting down in his body. It was interesting, how he ignored his body most of the time, and yet now it of all times it demanded his attention. He was afraid to die. Most humans were, and L particularly so. Fear and confusion warred in his dark eyes, and he couldn’t look away from Orpheus, not for a second, because what if he did and that was it? It felt extremely important that his last sight be Orpheus’ kind, gentle face. He tried to lift a hand to touch it, brush the tears away. He didn’t want Orpheus to cry, why was he crying why….why wouldn’t L’s hand move from where it had hit the ground? When death came for him, it did not take his hand gently. It wasn’t a peaceful, calm closing of his eyes. He let out a small, strangled whimper as his heart seemed to lurch and twist itself in his chest. Then a tiny gasp, then another, and then his body was fighting, fighting draw air into broken lungs, trying to force blood through a failing heart. Panic set in, flashes of another death, of a time when pale hands had wrapped around his throat, green eyes instead of hazel staring into his. “I...I...I...l” he managed between gasps, his eyes staring into Orpheus’, his brow furrowing as he fought for his life, just a few seconds longer. Then the sounds stopped escaping him and he lay rigid, his mouth open, his eyes wide with terror, his lungs screaming for air he couldn’t have. He choked on nothing. Then darkness curled around his vision and his wide eyes stopped staring at Orpheus and simply stared, the light bleeding away, leaving them cold. And the world went away,
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Transgender
strider
No mourners, no funerals
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Post by strider on Jan 9, 2021 19:46:18 GMT -5
Orpheus knew what heartbreak was. It was the sinking feeling that pervaded his entire body as he turned behind, the shock on Eurydice’s face, the way he’d reached for her, the knowledge that her death was on him. Heartbreak was staring numbly into the hole that was left by someone who was your entire world. Heartbreak was sitting here, L’s head resting against his chest, watching fear flicker through his vision, listening to what was supposed to be last words, and not being able to do anything about it. Heartbreak was shaking fingers and tears that wouldn’t stop coming and a body that wasn’t moving, eyes that searched his for achingly long seconds before they went dark. No. Orpheus had a song. He had song that was supposed to bring back spring, that was supposed to bring back life after winter was over. L had been his spring. L had taught him what it was to love again, L had reminded him that even when Eurydice was gone, maybe it was okay to smile, to feel… Would the song work? Would it bring L back? “You lied,” he whispered, pressing his face into L’s dark hair. “You said it was safe.” Tears brimmed and overflowed, and there was no magic road to the Underworld this time. His voice could make stones weep, but what did it matter in the face of a place that didn’t care? “I lied to you, too,” he added softly, rocking back and forth as he held L’s too-still body. “I lied by omission. I never… I never told you I loved-” a sob broke off the words, and he sat there, shaking and holding L as close as he can. Maybe… maybe if he could protect L from the House long enough, he’d come back. Maybe it would be alright. “I should’ve realized,” he whispered, squeezing his eyes shut. “I should’ve realized there was something wrong.” He let silence fall, the weight of the blame hanging heavy in the air. His fault, for not realizing. His fault for letting L do this. His fault for not understanding why. Maybe… Orpheus breathed out, hefting L’s body up and cradling it so close. There was a door, now. Had there always been a door? Orpheus had been enjoying himself too much to notice. That joy felt hollow, now, knowing what L had been keeping from him. The tinny, annoying music from the game faded into the background and he passed into the hallway. “Alright,” he whispered, still holding L close, not daring to let him go for even a moment. He didn’t trust what the House would do if he let L out of his sight. “Bring him back.” His voice was thin and steely, harder than it had ever been before. “We made it through your room, now give him another chance. Bring him back!” The last word was spat out, fury at the House filling him. Had he ever felt that angry before? Yes, once… at L, though that had been the House’s doing. He glanced down, lifting up an arm to gently brush L’s hair back from his face. It would have been easy to believe he was sleeping, if his skin hadn’t already started to pale and cool. There was no answer. So Orpheus took matters into his own hands, storming through a door with only one thought on his mind: he had to find a way to bring L back. As terrified as he was about losing his best friend to a misunderstanding… he needed him alive. And he wanted to tell him the truth.
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Post by ®Hawkpath® on Jan 9, 2021 20:40:28 GMT -5
The room Orpheus entered was simple, almost too simple. A hard floor. Clean white walls. A flat ceiling. It had nothing to suggest it had ever existed before this moment, and nothing to suggest it ever would afterwards. There was nothing in it. Or, almost nothing. In the center was a simple round wooden table, completely clean and bare save for a small piece of paper, folded crisply in half. The other thing was a person, facing away from Orpheus. 5’3. Slight build. Brown hair that fell just past their shoulders. Black t-shirt. Jeans. They turned, slowly, the moment Orpheus walked in. Green eyes. Freckles dotting their face. And a vague, almost childlike expression on their slim features. They didn’t speak. Or move. They stood still, hands clasped in front of them, eyes flicking over Orpheus’ features, then down to L’s limp, cooling body. They looked back up at Orpheus, and they blinked, then blinked again, the vague expression slipping away to be replaced by something else. Curiosity.
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Transgender
strider
No mourners, no funerals
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Post by strider on Jan 9, 2021 22:51:27 GMT -5
Orpheus didn’t dare put L down, but he did wipe his tears away with the palm of his hand. “I’m going to bring you back,” he promised softly, holding the body just a little bit closer before he moved to the corner and very reluctantly set it down. He wanted to believe this room would be the key to that. But the House was never that kind. The fact that there was someone here was slightly unusual, as was the fact that they hadn’t touched the piece of paper on the table. Orpheus hesitated before standing up fully and leaving L behind him. What did the House want from him? He picked up the note with trembling fingers, eyes widening as he read it. You want something from me? Great. Do something for me. Kill them. Was that all this person was here for? To be killed? Revulsion boiled up in Orpheus’ stomach, and for the first time he took a good, long look. “Hi,” he murmured, raising a hand in greeting. The look in his eyes was hard, removed from anything other than getting L back. Still… he wasn’t going to mindlessly kill a stranger.
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Post by ®Hawkpath® on Jan 9, 2021 23:14:35 GMT -5
The person watched, their eyes curious as Orpheus took the note. They stood still, not speaking, not doing much of anything besides simply existing. They might have been a robot for all they acted on their own. The person who had carried the other person was staring still, looking at the paper. The House creation began slowly to think as they watched. It was a bit like waking up and at the same time nothing at all like that, it was like...it was like being born and looking at your surroundings and not being sure what you’re supposed to be doing. Their eyes widened a touch and they tilted their head a little as Orpheus spoke to them. “Hi.” They said back, then started a little at the sound of their own voice, which was lower than they had expected it to be. They raised a hand, too, copying the movement, then lowering it again and looking at it. They understood what things were, but...they didn’t seem to know much. Of anything. When they looked at Orpheus again, they seemed to notice his expression for the first time. He looked...they weren’t sure how he looked.
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Transgender
strider
No mourners, no funerals
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Post by strider on Jan 9, 2021 23:30:52 GMT -5
The stranger seemed innocent. Innocent and unarmed. Orpheus didn’t even have a weapon, but the person seemed naïve enough that, if he were really going to attack, he wouldn’t need one. How could he be so cruel as to attack someone unarmed? To kill just to get L back? Because, a tiny voice told him, that’s how much you want L back. He hated that the voice wasn’t wrong. “Do you know why you’re here?” Orpheus asked after a moment, frowning at the paper, then L, then the person in front of him. If the House wanted him to kill someone, couldn’t it at least have given him someone who deserved to be hurt? Then again… Orpheus probably wouldn’t have been willing to fight even someone who deserved it. Because nobody deserved to die. Even if they had lives on their hands. People were still people, and even after everything, that was one fundamental belief that Orpheus couldn’t shake. He wasn’t sure if he expected the person to attack. If they knew why they were here, wouldn’t they want to? Would they be scared enough to? It seemed more likely based on their expression that they were clueless. I’m sorry, love, Orpheus thought to himself, but I think you’d agree I shouldn’t kill for you. Even if this person isn’t real. The thing was… they were here. They were, by some definition, real.
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Post by ®Hawkpath® on Jan 10, 2021 11:04:02 GMT -5
The person didn’t move. They didn’t look away from Orpheus for even a second, though there was no suspicion in their eyes, only interest and not a little confusion. They paused, thinking the question over. What were they here for? The way Orpheus said it made them think there had to be a reason, though they had no idea what if could be. “No.” They answered, tilting their head to look at him. They had nothing to go off of, nothing to even begin to guess what they existed for, but...Orpheus seemed to know something. From the way he looked at them, anyway, it seemed he knew something they didn’t. “Do...do you know why I’m here?” They asked hesitantly. A glance at L’s body again, though they didn’t understand exactly what they were seeing. With no context to go off of, they had no idea what was normal and what wasn’t, what was worth mentioning or not. Questions burned in their head. They almost asked them, but something kept them quiet, something made them watch Orpheus instead, eyes wide.
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Transgender
strider
No mourners, no funerals
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Post by strider on Jan 10, 2021 17:48:55 GMT -5
“We’re in a place called the House,” Orpheus murmured, voice soft. “The being who runs this place – or maybe who is this place, it’s hard to tell for sure – killed,” he had to pause here, glancing at L’s body with nothing short of extreme pain written across his face. “Killed my friend.” He glanced back down at the piece of paper, seconds away from swearing at the House. But he didn’t do that. It wasn’t going to turn him into something he wasn’t. Not now, not when L was counting on him. “That paper,” he continued, trying to keep his voice soft and gentle. “That paper says that if I want my friend back, I have to kill you.” He lifted his hands, trying to show that he was unarmed. He didn’t say anything more, just waited for the person’s reaction. He didn’t want them to think he was just going to kill them, but he needed to know if they were going to be volatile about it. Besides… part of him was telling him there was no way to get L back other than doing as the House asked.
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Post by ®Hawkpath® on Jan 10, 2021 20:39:14 GMT -5
The person listened quietly, not interrupting Orpheus. Their eyes searched his face quickly and they paused, processing his words. “Your friend.” They said slowly, glancing at L’s body in the corner, then back at Orpheus. They could read him, they realized. He looked injured. “Your friend.” They said again, tasting the word carefully. They didn’t stop looking at Orpheus. “What is a friend?” They asked curiously, unsure what exactly the word meant. They understood most of that he’d said, and a shadow passed over their face as they glanced at L’s body again, the situation sinking in. Then they heard the rest and stopped moving. “Oh.” They said it very softly, their green eyes wide as they looked at Orpheus. Stared at him. They looked at the paper a second later, but they couldn’t understand the words. And why would he lie about that? A long pause. Then they spoke, their voice was still soft and quiet, “I don’t understand.” They told him. “I exist to die?”
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Transgender
strider
No mourners, no funerals
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Post by strider on Jan 10, 2021 20:48:10 GMT -5
“A friend is someone… you care for. Who makes you smile, and helps you when you’ve had a bad day, who knows your favorite song and what you like to eat, and who has stood by your side when times were hard.” Orpheus glanced at L, swallowing back the pain as best he could. “A friend… keeps your secrets and helps you become the best version of yourself.” He gave a small smile, then glanced up at the person. “A friend sees who you are and isn’t afraid of it, and they let you see them, too.” Did he place more into the meaning of friendship than most people? Perhaps. But the people he called friends deserved that sort of phrase. Orpheus lifted his gaze, meeting the person’s eyes. Would he betray every part of himself in order to bring L back? “I’m not going to kill you,” he whispered, hoping that was enough. “That might be what the House put you here for, but I don’t care what the House intended. You’re… you’re a person, and your life matters, and maybe… maybe I’d rather be your friend than the person who hurts you.” He glanced back at L one last time before forcing a smile he didn’t really feel. “I’m Orpheus,” he murmured, holding out a hand for the person to shake. “What do they call you?”
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Post by ®Hawkpath® on Jan 10, 2021 21:00:52 GMT -5
“A friend does all that?” The person murmured, surprised by the description. It was a lot for one person to do. Yet, apparently, this person and the dead one did all that, since he had called the dead one his friend. “It must be very hard to be a friend, then.” They added, considering it with their head tilted to one side. “Since that’s a lot to do.” They hesitated. Did they believe him? He had every reason to kill them, for his friend, who he knew better than he knew them. They’d never met him before, after all, and he has neve met them. It didn’t quite make sense, and they frowned a little. “Even though your friend is dead?” They asked carefully. Maybe it would have been smarter to just accept what he said, but they couldn’t do that, not when they didn’t understand. “He’s a person too. And he’s your friend, and I’m not yet. Why would you decide not to kill me if it could bring him back?” They genuinely didn’t understand. They were glad, though. They hesitated a moment later, glancing down at the hand for a moment before taking it gently. “I don’t know.” They admitted, eyes wide as they stared at him. “I’ve never been called anything before.”
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Transgender
strider
No mourners, no funerals
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Post by strider on Jan 10, 2021 21:09:36 GMT -5
“It’s not that hard,” Orpheus returned softly, giving Elpis something of a smile. It was all he could manage. “See, when you’re friends with someone, you want to do all of those things for them. It comes naturally. People are very social creatures – we’re hardwired to care, and caring brings all of that with it.” He did his best to avoid looking at L’s body, cooling by the side of the room. “There’s something you should know about the House,” Orpheus murmured, meeting the person’s gaze. “Something you should know about most people in authority, actually. They want something from you. They tell you they can do something if you give them something in return, but often their request is unfair. There’s almost always a way around it, almost always something else you can do to avoid paying that much. There will be another way to bring my friend back that doesn’t cost your life. I just… have to find it.” He set his jaw, breathing in, and staring at the wall with something like defiance. And stubbornness. He was good at being stubborn and idealistic, and he was good at finding a way to do the impossible without hurting anyone. “People can be reasoned with. I just have to find something else the House wants, and give it up.” His expression shifted as he looked back at the person. “You don’t… have a name?” Bastard, he thought pointedly at the House, though he didn’t say it out loud. “Well… is there something you’d like to be called?”
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Post by ®Hawkpath® on Jan 10, 2021 21:29:07 GMT -5
The person nodded a little. They didn’t quite understand, but they believed him. Out of the two of them, who actually had a friend, after all? Orpheus seemed sincere, and they had no reason not to believe what he told them. They almost looked at L’s body again, but they didn’t, instead focusing on Orpheus. “Okay.” He seemed to know what he was talking about. They took his words to heart, glancing at the wall as though they expected to see the being Orpheus spoke of. Whatever this thing was, it had killed someone, then tried to being Orpheus kill someone else to reverse it. It didn’t seem very nice to them, to say the least. They couldn’t remember anything from before this room, before they’d turned to face Orpheus. “I believe you.” They added, their expression genuine. They tried to offer a small smile to prove they meant it, too. “How are you going to reason with it? Do you know what it might want? I mean...apparently it wants you to kill me, for some reason. And it wanted to kill your friend. Do you know why it did those things?” Too many questions, probably. But they wanted to understand their situation as soon as they could, and Orpheus seemed to have answers. They hesitated, then shook their head a little. “What sort of things are people called?” They asked, unsure what a name could be. They couldn’t think of anything that might work...did they even know any names?
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Transgender
strider
No mourners, no funerals
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Post by strider on Jan 11, 2021 1:06:18 GMT -5
Was this how others often saw Orpheus? Idealistic and naïve, willing to believe the first person he met? Of course, there was a difference between Orpheus and the person in front of him now. Orpheus had been hurt before, he had experienced loss, he knew there was always a risk to trusting someone. He had been betrayed, before. But he continued to do it anyway. Which was, perhaps, why he chose to befriend this person rather than just kill them and get it over with. “It thrives on entertainment,” Orpheus replied quietly, frowning a little bit at the wall. “At least, that’s the running theory. Nobody’s ever actually spoken to it, I think it doesn’t deign to speak with us. But… I think if I’m entertaining enough… then it might have to listen to me. Because I’m sorry, but I won’t kill you.” He met the person’s eyes as he said that, hoping that they would take him at his word. He didn’t want them to be afraid of him. He regarded them for a few long moments, trying to think of what he would call them, if he had the choice. “Maybe I’m not the best person to be asking what people are called,” he murmured softly, awkwardly scratching the back of his neck. “My name means orphaned, or abandoned. You deserve a better name than that.” He considered for a long moment, then gave a small smile. “What about Elpis? It means hope. And… well, you’re sort of my only hope here for getting my friend back. And I hope that you have the freedom to make something of your life, even if you don’t remember anything before this.”
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Post by ®Hawkpath® on Jan 11, 2021 1:22:29 GMT -5
The person wasn’t suspicious. They didn’t know how to be. Orpheus was telling them it was safe, and why wouldn’t they believe him? Orpheus was telling them he wouldn’t kill them. If he’d wanted to why would he have told them what the note said? He could have just attacked before they knew what hit them, and he probably could have won, easily. It didn’t make any sense to think he was anything but what he claimed to be. “Wait,” they said, a small frown creeping over their expression. “It killed your friend without even speaking with either of you?” That….seemed very cruel. They looked at the wall, then the ceiling, trying to imagine what sort of being would do that. They couldn’t imagine it, though. A being with incredible power, surely, but why would anything want to kill? “Thank you for not killing me.” They added in a murmur, looking back at Orpheus. They believed him completely, they found, somehow trusting him even though they’d never met him before. “Even to save your friend. Is there anything I can do to help you bring him back? Besides dying, I guess.” Another pause. Then they brightened, a smile coming over their features. “Elpis is a very good name,” they agreed, turning it over and over in their head. “Elpis. My name is Elpis.” Their expression shifted a moment later. “I don’t remember anything before this.” They admitted quietly. “Did I...exist before this? Was I created for the sole purpose of being killed by you?”
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Transgender
strider
No mourners, no funerals
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Post by strider on Jan 11, 2021 1:38:03 GMT -5
“Yes,” Orpheus replied quietly, swallowing back the anger in his tone. “It set a trap for us. L didn’t tell me… he didn’t tell me he was in danger. He wanted to make sure I didn’t die, and I didn’t catch him on his lie…” he risked a glance back at L, emotion welling up in his throat at the way L’s face hadn’t changed except in color. It was too pale, too waxy… there was no spark, no slight rise and fall of his chest. If it had ever been easy to believe he was just asleep, it wasn’t easy now. “I didn’t see it coming. But he sacrificed himself for me.” His gaze shifted towards the paper and he ripped it up, symbolically destroying the House’s request. He wasn’t going to follow through. He was going to make his own way, even if it seemed impossible. Nothing was impossible, there was always another way… Orpheus just had to be strong enough to succeed this time. “Of course,” he murmured softly, hazel eyes meeting green. “You don’t deserve to die, even to bring back someone who’s important to me. I guess…” he considered for a long moment, trying to think what L would do in Orpheus’ place. He didn’t know the answer to that. He didn’t know if Elpis would even be alive if L were in his place. He hoped they would be. “I’ll think about it.” The smile suited them. Orpheus returned it as best he could, though his own was dulled by grief and the pervasive fear that this could be it. This could be how he lost L forever. “I’m glad you like it, Elpis.” He crossed his arms, then let his expression grow more serious as he considered. “Play a game with me,” he managed after a long moment. “If I win… I get my friend back. If you win… the House has to set you free to have a life of your own. It doesn’t matter if you were created for this. What matters is what you get to do with your existence now. And… if I can’t have my friend back, then I’d at least like for you to have an actual life, yeah?”
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Post by ®Hawkpath® on Jan 11, 2021 18:32:28 GMT -5
Elpis, too, glanced at L. “Is that another thing friends do?” They asked quietly, tilting their head a little to look at Orpheus again. “Sacrifice themselves?” It seemed possible. Friends clearly cared a lot about each other, after all, and if that was what the dead one - L - had done, for Orpheus, then it made sense. Their eyes widened as he tore up the paper. He meant it, then. He wouldn’t kill them, not even for his friend, not even to bring back the person who had died for him. It didn’t make sense to them...why would he put their life over L’s? They met his eyes for a long moment, trying to figure him out. “If the House killed him, and created me to be killed by you to get him back...what’s the point? What’s the purpose of killing someone only to give you a way to bring them back? What’s the point in creating something you mean to destroy?” They searched his eyes, looking for answers, unsure whether what they asked made sense. “It’s in power. So it must want something from you. You said it thrives off entertainment...is this fun for it? What’s the purpose of having power only to use it like this?” They didn’t understand. The House didn’t have to do this. And yet here they were, a body cooling in the corner, a person refusing to kill to get him back. And Elpis. Elpis, who didn’t understand. Elpis, who wanted answers, who wanted to know why they existed, who didn’t want to accept that they’d been created merely to be killed. Yet they believed Orpheus. They didn’t think he was lying for even a second. “A game?” They repeated, startled. “What kind of game? Will the House agree to it? What if we play and nothing happens at the end? Why would the House agree to those terms if the House is the one who did this in the first place?” It was all so confusing. They shifted, looking at L’s body again, and their expression fell a little. “I’ll do it.” They added quietly. An actual life...what would that be like? They didn’t have the slightest idea what it would mean. They didn’t know who they were, they didn’t know what life was, they didn’t understand.
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Transgender
strider
No mourners, no funerals
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Post by strider on Jan 12, 2021 16:10:47 GMT -5
“Huh?” Orpheus glanced up, eyes widening as he regarded Elpis. This time, however, he couldn’t help but look over at where L’s body lay cooling in the corner. “No,” he murmured softly, unsure how he felt about that. “No, most friends don’t sacrifice themselves. L was just… an exceptionally good friend.” The words rose like a lump in his throat. He couldn’t stop his voice from trembling, couldn’t hide the emotion there. He loved L. Maybe Elpis wouldn’t pick up on it. Did they even know what love was? Hopefully, they wouldn’t call him out on it. “I guess… friends are supposed to make sacrifices, sometimes. They might put aside something they’re excited about to help a friend who isn’t having a very good day, but… their life?” He shook his head. “You shouldn’t expect a friend to do that,” he managed. He certainly hadn’t expected L to do it. If Orpheus knew what Elpis was thinking, he would have told them they had the wrong idea. He wasn’t putting Elpis’ life above L’s. He wasn’t prioritizing anyone over anyone else. He was just… finding a way to save both. Even if he knew the House could kill Elpis without a second thought. “I don’t know,” he admitted softly. “I don’t know how the House thinks, or why it does what it does. I think… it likes watching people. It likes seeing how we react. I’m sorry, Elpis, but I know a lot of people who would have killed you without a second thought if they thought they could get something out of it, especially something as precious as a friend’s life. But this time… this time we can prove the House wrong. It cannot push me to betray what I believe. It cannot break you.” Orpheus didn’t have answers. He wished he did, he wished he could explain to Elpis why the House did what it did. He wished he could tell them what the point of anything was, but… he didn’t know. “If you win,” Orpheus said, holding their gaze for a long moment, “You get to find your own answers to your questions. I’m sorry I don’t have what you want. But… you deserve an actual life.” He looked up, breathing out. “Is that acceptable to you, House? L’s life or Elpis’ freedom? Are those the kind of stakes you’re okay with?” Is this entertaining enough for you? He didn’t voice that last thought, afraid it would cause the House to cast its ire onto them both.
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Post by ®Hawkpath® on Jan 12, 2021 18:20:59 GMT -5
“Oh.” Elpis let their gaze rest on Orpheus, watching his expression as he looked at L’s body. There was so much emotion in his eyes, they could almost feel his pain just by looking at him, just by existing near him. So what L had done was unusual, then. They nodded seriously, not totally sure what to make of that. “You must really care about him.” They said gently, their expression searching. They didn’t understand what they saw, they didn’t have anything to go off of, they just knew what Orpheus told them. “He must have cared about you, too.” They added softly. “If he died for you, and that isn’t normal. Maybe he cared about you more than most friends do.” It was a logical conclusion to draw, wasn’t it? They may not have understood much, but they knew Orpheus’ was telling the truth. Or, perhaps they didn’t know that so much as they believed it. Were they naive? Perhaps. They didn’t know enough not to be. They hesitated, then looked away, biting their lip. “I couldn’t blame them for that.” They said softly, shrugging. “The House created me for that purpose. If I have any quarrel at all, isn’t it with the House itself?” They blinked, looking back at Orpheus. “It created me.” They answered uncertainly. “If I’m no more than a toy, then it can break me if it wants to. I’m not sure it makes sense to think there’s anything anyone can do about that.” They shook their head slightly. “Not you, though.” They added, “it couldn’t make you kill me. Maybe you’re stronger than I am.” They didn’t look away. To find their own answers...to live an actual life...they didn’t know what that would be like. But they wanted to find out. They really, really did. They looked up, half expecting someone to be looking back at them, to answer them. The House had done this, after all, wouldn’t it want to be involved in their decision? For a moment it seemed nothing happened. Then Elpis looked back at Orpheus and started, their eyes moving to the small checkered square resting on the table, scattered with black and white discs. “That wasn’t there before….” they said uncertainly, glancing at Orpheus to see his reaction.
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Transgender
strider
No mourners, no funerals
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Post by strider on Jan 12, 2021 21:21:02 GMT -5
Orpheus glanced at Elpis, his heart thudding. What would Elpis do if he told them the truth? The thing Orpheus hadn’t even been able to tell L before he’d died? The thing he desperately wished he had been strong enough to say. “Can I tell you a secret, Elpis? If… if you promise not to tell him, if he wakes up?” Orpheus heaved in a breath, his hand absentmindedly tapping a rhythm on the side of his leg. “I do really care about him,” he began softly, hazel eyes moving towards L’s body. He really needed to stop looking at it, he was only going to make this worse for himself, reminding himself how much L was relying on him. How much he had to lose if this didn’t work out. “As… as something other than friends. A lot of people would say more than friends, but… but friendship is important, so I don’t know if I believe that there’s anything more than it, just… something other. Something that you can feel on top of friendship, sometimes. And… and I feel that for L. I… I love him. And I don’t know what I’m going to do with myself if I lose him.” It was as raw and honest as Orpheus was capable of being. “So… you’re right. I care about him more than most friends do, but… I doubt he feels the same for me. He’s just… a really good friend. He’s really good at being a friend. And… and I’m okay with that.” He forced a smile, holding Elpis’ gaze. It was probably stupid to tell them all that, but he couldn’t keep it to himself anymore. “I’m not stronger than you,” he added softly, looking away. “And I think you’re stronger than you believe you are. I mean… the House created you, and you’re still conspiring against it. That seems pretty strong to me.” He tried to keep his tone light and optimistic. Tried to show Elpis that he believed in them, and he did. He truly did, even though he didn’t know them. Orpheus followed Elpis’ gaze, his eyes widening as he noticed the board. “Oh,” he murmured, going to sit at the chair beside the table. “It’s… a game. I’m… not sure how to play it, though,” he admitted, frowning at the white and black discs. “Perhaps… I play as white, and you as black?” He glanced to the side, finding a piece of paper there that he could’ve sworn hadn’t been there before. “Instructions,” he said, picking it up and skimming through them. “It doesn’t seem that difficult.”
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Post by ®Hawkpath® on Jan 12, 2021 22:41:25 GMT -5
Elpis listened quietly, their eyes widening a little as they took in everything Orpheus told them. Things they didn’t quite understand, but that seemed very important to Orpheus, so they listened without interrupting even once. Not even to ask one of the questions burning in their head. I love him. Something shifted behind their eyes at that, something deep inside that they didn’t fully understand. A want, maybe. Or just confusion, or...no, they didn’t know what to call it, only something inside them wondered if it belonged to them. It felt old. It felt older than them, older than they could imagine being. They searched Orpheus’ gaze, and their gaze latched onto what they saw, the expression in the human’s eyes when he looked at the body in the corner. It was different from the way he looked at them. They wished there were more people to watch, to see if they could pinpoint exactly what it was that made Orpheus’ voice so soft, that made his eyes so deep. “What is love?” They asked softly, barely daring to speak. “It’s...not the same as being friends. It’s on top of being friends. Does love make you sacrifice yourself, then? Wait…” they frowned. “I don’t understand. If you love him but he doesn’t love you...then why is he the one who sacrificed himself?” They paused a moment later, glancing at Orpheus, unsure. “I’m not doing anything that impressive.” They told him, shrugging a little. “I just want to help you. The House created me to die, and it will probably just kill me itself when this room ends, so...I want to do something good for the short time I do exist. Does that make sense? I mean, assuming I lose...and you get your friend back...will you do something for me?” They looked at him for a long moment, expression earnest. “Will you remember me? I think I would like to be remembered by someone alive. Especially someone as kind as you.” They nodded to themself, then looked at the board, and moved to sit across from Orpheus. “I don’t know how to play either.” They told him, leaning over to look at the pieces. “What do the instructions say?”
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Transgender
strider
No mourners, no funerals
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Post by strider on Jan 13, 2021 15:08:36 GMT -5
Orpheus glanced at Elpis, eyes wide and sad. “Love is… difficult to explain. Some people… some people seem to experience it as something separate from being friends, and plenty of people love their friends, but… there are different kinds of love.” He knew that didn’t make much sense, and he also knew he might not be the best person to explain it. Nonetheless, he was going to do his best. “This would be easier if I had my lyre,” he admitted softly, awkwardly scratching at the back of his neck. “I explain things better in poetry. But… you love your friends on one level. And then… when you love someone, it’s a warm feeling in the pit of your stomach when they smile, and when you hold them, it’s as though they’re the entire world. It’s knowing someone, knowing their place in your life, knowing that you couldn’t live without them, or… or if you could, you couldn’t live nearly as well. It’s… it’s indescribable, Elpis.” His expression lit up when he spoke, though he seemed to be looking through them, not at them. Like he was picturing another time. “Love… makes you want to turn the world upside down if only to do something good for the person you love. It… it makes even the littlest gestures seem grand. And sometimes… yes, sometimes it can make you sacrifice everything.” He held Elpis’ gaze for a long moment, then his eyes widened as he realized what Elpis was saying. “Oh.” His brow furrowed, and he found he didn’t have an answer. “He… he sacrificed himself because he cares deeply. He’s the sort of person who does, he cares so much, and nobody knows it, because he’s good at hiding it.” Any attempt not to look at L’s body was completely forgotten. “But I think… he would have sacrificed himself for any of his friends. The ones who have come close to earning his trust, anyway.” Orpheus turned his attention back to the game in front of them. He was listening to Elpis, but he was also scanning through the instructions one more time to make sure he understood. It seemed almost deceptively simple, but if this was what the House wanted them to play… “Hm?” He lifted his gaze, meeting Elpis’ and not looking away even for a moment. “I don’t think the House would kill you, at least not permanently. If… if I get out of here, and you don’t… I promise I’ll remember you.” He hesitated for another long moment, unsure whether what he wanted to say next would be welcome, or even appropriate. “Not only that… I promise I’ll find you again. And I’ll find a way to free you from the House. You deserve your own life, and you’re… gods, you’re so clearly your own person… I promise I’ll try.”
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Post by ®Hawkpath® on Jan 13, 2021 21:06:52 GMT -5
It didn’t quite make sense to Elpis, love. It seemed to be different from being friends, yet the only concrete difference they knew of was that friends didn’t tend to sacrifice themselves, and apparently people experiencing love did. “You love him.” They said slowly, piecing it together as best they could. “That’s why you care so much that he’s dead.” They glanced at the body again, following Orpheus’ gaze. His expression when he looked...it said more than his words. They couldn’t help wondering whether they didn’t understand because they couldn’t understand. If the House had created them without that ability. “I don’t know...exactly what it is.” They murmured, looking back at Orpheus, their eyes wide. “Or even if I can. The House might not have given me that ability. Maybe I can’t understand.” They didn’t look at L’s body again. Their attention was only on Orpheus. “So friends don’t usually sacrifice themselves...and he sacrificed himself….and love makes you sacrifice yourself...but he doesn’t love you?” They tilted their head a little. “Well...have you ever asked him?” That seemed a logical step to them. They hesitate, but they couldn’t quite help continuing. “Do you...do you want him to love you?” It was all very confusing. They were doing their best to figure it out, though. They looked at the game. “I don’t know how to play this.” They murmured, picking up a piece and holding it up to the light. It was small. They couldn’t tell what it was made out of. They sniffed it curiously, then replaced it, looking at Orpheus again as they did. “Why not?” They asked quietly, meeting the other person’s gaze. “Why not kill me permanently? I was made for one purpose, and within seconds I failed even that. Why would it bother keeping me around?” They tried to sound nonchalant about it, but the truth was that they didn’t want to be gone, they didn’t want to go out of existence as effortlessly as they had come into it. They wanted a life, as Orpheus had offered them. They wanted to exist, and to find answers, and maybe even to learn what this love Orpheus spoke of felt like. “Oh.” Their eyes widened a little. “That...means a lot to me. You trying. It really does.” They looked at the game again. And paused. And they didn’t look at the body. And they tried to ignore the idea forming in their head. But...well. Orpheus had said they wouldn’t probably die permanently...right? If they knew how to swear, they might have done it quietly then. Because the game hadn’t even started and they had the strangest feeling they were going to lose.
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