Transgender
strider
No mourners, no funerals
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Post by strider on Jul 25, 2021 1:17:48 GMT -5
“No,” Orpheus replied quietly, but it wasn’t immediately clear what he was refuting. He managed to push himself to his elbows, one hand raising to trace L’s temple down to the line of his jaw. “You… are you sure you’re okay?” Orpheus searched L’s eyes, hoping it was clear enough that he wasn’t going to turn away until he had an answer. L hadn’t been acting like himself, and now he was, but… but what mattered was that for a brief time, he wasn’t. For a brief time, he had laughed about things that weren’t reasonably funny, and he hadn’t been able to think properly. Orpheus was in love with more than L’s brain of course, but it was still incredibly disconcerting to watch him without full command of it. He could tell that, even now, L wasn’t back to normal. He was closer, though, which made Orpheus feel a little bit more like he could slip into the exhaustion in his head and it would be okay. “We should… go…” Orpheus continued, shaking his head firmly as he tried to stand up. He wasn’t entirely certain his legs would hold him, but it didn’t matter. If they didn’t get out now, he wasn’t convinced that they would ever get back. The House had fixed both of them… was it terribly beyond the realm of possibility that it might decide to bring Damon back as well, just to see what would happen?
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Post by ®Hawkpath® on Jul 25, 2021 1:36:27 GMT -5
L looked at Orpheus for a long moment, the headache from whatever had happened to him making it hard to think at all, much less decide how to answer that. He didn’t know if he could completely truthfully say he was okay, but he knew Orpheus was going to worry if he didn’t, and he thought he probably would be, soon enough. It had worn off, mostly. He could still sort of remember the laughter that had attacked him, but he no longer understood what he’d found so amusing…which was probably a good thing. He met Orpheus’ eyes, hesitating as he tried to think of a good answer. “I’m…better,” he decided carefully. That was accurate. He was better then he had been. “It’s unimportant. We need to get you safe…” He reached out, catching Orpheus’ arm and gently tugging him back down. “Wait,” he said softly. “Wait…you can’t walk like that. You'll fall…we need to wait here. It’s alright. We can wait a while and get out of here once you’ve rested.” Which was only true if the House didn’t throw anything else at them, but L wasn’t sure he could carry Orpheus, and he didn’t want him to fall and hurt himself. If something happened…he would just have to handle it.
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Transgender
strider
No mourners, no funerals
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Post by strider on Jul 25, 2021 1:46:16 GMT -5
Orpheus had been doing his absolute best not to mention that body. Even in his uncertain, confused state, he knew that L wouldn’t want to come face to face with someone he had killed, even if that someone deserved it. It was… complicated. L wasn’t a killer, but he had taken a life in this room to protect Orpheus. A life Orpheus had threatened… would L have to bear the burden of it if L had been the one to plunge the knife into Damon’s chest? It was hard to tell, because it hadn’t been intentional. It was a spur of the moment thing, something that had occurred because there had been a choice to make between Damon and having L and Orpheus both together in the same room at the same time, both beautifully alive. Neither life could be recouped, but Damon would likely hurt more people if he were allowed to live. Orpheus was fairly certain that, if he were the one allowed to live, he would do his best to make other’s lives better. “It could bring him back,” Orpheus rasped after a long moment, tilting his head at the body. He didn’t want to be worrying about a corpse before the House used it to hurt him…. “We don’t have time for… for me to sit and rest, I can walk. I promise.” It was a like and not a very good one. Orpheus knew he could barely move at the moment, but he was recovering. He would be ready to go as soon as it was possible for him to bear the weight of his body.
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Post by ®Hawkpath® on Jul 25, 2021 15:31:30 GMT -5
L didn’t want to process what had happened. He didn’t want to think about the feeling of a knife going through flesh, of stabbing a person in the back. He knew he had done it…his memories were vague, but he couldn’t get the feeling of pushing the dagger into a living heart out of his head, and the better he felt, the more he was able to really consciously consider what had just happened. It was one thing to make a decision that ended in a death. That was what he had to deal with almost constantly. It was something else entirely to have physical caused the death of another person. He looked at the body, his eyes catching on the stab wound in the back, right over his heart. Had he intended to kill him? Had he been aiming for the heart? He couldn’t remember anymore. He didn’t know. He didn’t look away. Orpheus needed out of here…he knew he did. But it was hard to stop thinking about it, now that he’d begun. How could he get that out of his head? How could he make it stop? “No,” he said softly, though it wasn’t quite clear what he was referring to. His brain still seemed to be moving too slow, like it was wading through molasses instead of running. That was why there was too much blood. Orpheus wasn’t the only one bleeding after all. Apparently, House people had blood, too. He supposed that was interesting, but he couldn’t seem to make his brain concentrate on it at the moment. It was just too real.
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Transgender
strider
No mourners, no funerals
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Post by strider on Jul 25, 2021 20:59:28 GMT -5
Orpheus had seen the murder happen, he remembered it in vivid detail, but… well, the word was wrong. It wasn’t murder. It had been L protecting himself and Orpheus. It had been making sure that Damon couldn’t hurt anyone else. Orpheus still hated it. He had managed to avoid killing anyone in the House, and he wanted to keep it that way. He was certain L had wanted to keep it that way, too, but… he swallowed, hugging his arms to his chest and trying to get his brain to think properly. It was difficult… he was beginning to refill his veins with blood, but there still wasn’t enough of it going to his brain. It was hard to get any coherent thoughts to form, no matter how hard he tried. “I know it doesn’t help,” Orpheus murmured, forcing himself to breathe. He put a hand on L’s shoulder, trying to calm him as best he could, “but he wasn’t a blinker. I think the House put him here because it wanted to see how far it could push us. If you hadn’t acted, we’d both be dead by now.” It didn’t help. It just meant that they had both played right into the House’s hand, and while that didn’t necessarily make it worse, it wasn’t any easier to stomach. People thought that L was cruel. He had needed to make decisions before that had resulted in the death of innocents, but he wasn’t violent. He wasn’t the sort of person who took death lightly, and he didn’t kill. L Lawliet wasn’t a killer. In Orpheus’ mind, that fact was as irrefutable as ‘grass is green.’ In another world, perhaps, or another version of the world, L may have been a killer. Grass may have been blue. But not in the world that made sense to Orpheus. Orpheus pulled rather insistently on L’s shoulder, doing his best to pull him into a hug. They probably needed to leave sooner rather than later, but Orpheus needed to make sure L was okay. There was no moving forward if he wasn’t.
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Post by ®Hawkpath® on Jul 26, 2021 0:08:22 GMT -5
L hadn’t wanted to kill him. He hadn’t wanted to take a life, any life, even that one. He understood that it had been necessary, but he couldn’t seem to stop feeling the fact that he’d been the one to do it. He’d killed him. He’d physically shoved a knife through his heart. He wasn’t sure how to react to that knowledge. The knowledge there, at the end of the day, he was capable of it. He could do it, if it came down to it. He should have been happy. He should have felt relieved that he had protected Orpheus and himself, and in the rational part of his mind, he was. He was just having a hard time making that part make sense with the part there felt sick and appalled and like he wanted to tear his own skin off and become someone who’d never had blood on his hands before. He still had it on his hands. Too much…it was beginning to dry, too. Slowly turning from warm and wet to cold and cracked. As dead as the man it had come from. He didn’t move as Orpheus touched his shoulder. He needed to move…he needed to get up. This wasn’t good, this wasn’t what he needed. He didn’t resist as Orpheus pulled him into a hug. He just let himself lay there for a long moment, the trembling finally coming over him as his mind returned to full capacity. But he didn’t have time for this self pity. Finally, he moved, looking away from the body and pulling Orpheus’ arm over his shoulder to hoist him to his feet. He didn’t answer the silent question. He knew he wasn’t alright. But neither of them were at the moment, so all that mattered was getting out of there and dealing with the rest later. He headed for the door, carrying as much of Orpheus’ weight as he could.
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Transgender
strider
No mourners, no funerals
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Post by strider on Jul 26, 2021 0:29:20 GMT -5
L wasn’t a killer. Orpheus was absolutely certain of that. And, as much as he had cared for Elpis, as much as he had fought to spare their life, he didn’t think that killing a House person was the same as killing a blinker. The chances that a House person would be brought back were much higher than the chances that a blinker would come back. A blinker had a home and a family to return to, and their family would miss them, even if they were a terrible person. House people had nothing but the House. If they died permanently, only the House would ever know. It wouldn’t mourn them. Maybe they bled the same as blinkers did, maybe they died the same, but there was a difference. They weren’t alive, not the way other blinkers were alive. They weren’t human, even if they were people. Orpheus hated that he had the thought, and he knew it was no consolation, but if logic tracked, it made it slightly better that L had taken Damon’s life. Perhaps more compelling was the fact that they both would have died if L hadn’t taken action. He squeezed his shoulder, holding him as close as he dared. He didn’t want to get more blood on L if he could help it. He could see the way L was looking at the blood that coated his hands, even though most of it was Orpheus’. It didn’t take long for Orpheus to shift so he could rest more of his weight against L, though he was still trying to carry as much of his weight as possible. It was difficult, given the fact that his body hadn’t decided it had enough blood yet. He needed to keep making more, it seemed, and his heart was pumping as fast as it could possibly go without sending him straight into panic. Orpheus took the first tentative step towards the building exit. He tried to support himself as much as possible, so L wouldn’t have to practically carry him. He didn’t want to put L through that. He could carry his own weight, no matter how injured. Well… maybe not all of his weight. But at least enough of it that L wouldn’t collapse under it if he spent too long supporting him. “There,” Orpheus murmured, pointing at a doorway. He could see the living room on the other side. The House’s living room, not a fake one it had created. It meant… it meant safety, if not home. Home was supporting him as they walked there.
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Post by ®Hawkpath® on Jul 28, 2021 14:19:43 GMT -5
L could have probably argued with that conclusion, under different circumstances. He might have pointed out that the didn’t think someone’s worth depended on whether they would be missed. Sure, it mattered as far as maximum harm went, but he didn’t like to think killing someone no one knew was any more acceptable then killing a well loved person was. A life was a life. But he was preoccupied with the blood on his hands, and he didn’t speak, just let Orpheus hold him for a little bit longer before he finished getting them both up again. He didn’t stop holding Orpheus up as he walked, ignoring the shakiness of his own body as best he could. They were close…they were close now. He didn’t stop. He just nodded a little as Orpheus pointed out the exit. He stepped through the door, and into the living room. They’d made it. They’d made it out alive. He lowered Orpheus carefully, then went down, too, exhaustion washing over him. He didn’t speak. He didn’t know what to say. He had killed someone…he had killed someone, human or not. He couldn’t take that back, ever.
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Transgender
strider
No mourners, no funerals
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Post by strider on Jul 28, 2021 14:45:03 GMT -5
Orpheus blinked back to his world almost immediately after entering the living room. He was holding onto L for support, and then he wasn’t. It wasn’t very long until he blinked back in again, his hand resting easily on his lyre as he plucked out a short, simple melody. He wasn’t really playing so much as he was creating background music to make it a little bit easier to think. There was a lot floating through his head, and having to sit there in silence with it was torture. He didn’t notice the blink, at first. He was sitting on a carpet of soft grass, the sun behind him, and then he was sitting on vaguely rough carpet, the lights of the living room just barely dimmer than the setting sun. It took him a moment of breathing in the now-musty air to realize he had blinked, and when he opened his eyes he was relieved to find himself in the living room. He would rather that than another room that would take energy and attention. Especially if L was going to blink in with him again – he hoped he would. He hadn’t had the words to say to L last time. He wanted to do better by having them this time.
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Post by ®Hawkpath® on Jul 28, 2021 15:11:06 GMT -5
L had blinked back at the same moment, which meant he didn’t know for sure that he hadn’t left Orpheus behind. He hoped the House had been gentle with him. He hoped the House had been kind, but he didn’t trust that it had been. He was curled in his chair, the blood carefully scrubbed from his skin, a clean shirt replacing the bloodstained one. He still didn’t feel very clean. His eyes were closed, so he didn’t notice his appearance in the House. He was distracted, or he’d have noticed the scent, the shift in air, the different texture underneath him…it was a sign of how deeply lost in thought he was that he didn’t register it. He had wanted to blink in again. But, in a way…he was also afraid to. He didn’t know if he wanted to talk about what had happened. He didn’t know how to start even if he did.
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Transgender
strider
No mourners, no funerals
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Post by strider on Jul 28, 2021 15:43:18 GMT -5
Orpheus looked up, surprised to find someone blinking in so quickly. Usually there were a couple seconds between blinkers appearances, but apparently the House didn’t want to waste any time today. If L had noticed the blink, he didn’t give any indication of it, and Orpheus found he didn’t want to startle him. He glanced down at the lyre, deciding that would be the best way to inform L that he had blinked in. Slowly, careful to not play too loudly, Orpheus plucked one note, then another, easing the melody into the room. He glanced up at L, letting him decide when he wanted to break free from his thoughts. When, if ever, he wanted to acknowledge the blink. Orpheus would have been happy to play until they both blinked out, if that was more comfortable for L.
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Post by ®Hawkpath® on Jul 28, 2021 15:52:48 GMT -5
L didn’t notice the notes at first, they were so soft. They slipped into his brain slowly, calming him before he’d even registered their presence…and slowly, he realized what he was hearing, and then what he was feeling. The chair had tuned into the House’s familiar couch. And no one else could play music like that. He let a long moment pass before his eyes opened, and he turned to look quietly at Orpheus. He wasn’t surprised to have blinked back so soon…but he hadn’t come to any conclusion about how he felt yet, so it was frustrating. He didn’t speak. He wasn’t sure what to say. How was he supposed to do this?
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Transgender
strider
No mourners, no funerals
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Post by strider on Jul 28, 2021 16:24:48 GMT -5
A soft smile crossed Orpheus’ features as he looked up at L, trying to read his expression. He wasn’t used to the uncertainty there. L was a lot of things, but he was rarely uncertain. He usually knew what he was doing and was fine going after it, even if other people didn’t understand or agree. Orpheus loved him for that, but now it seemed like he was stuck. Stuck on the last room they’d shared, surely. Orpheus could still feel Damon’s knife plunging first into his chest and then into his back. He could feel the confusion and panic that flooded him, the fear at the way L was acting, because it wasn’t L. It wasn’t anywhere close to L. “Are you alright?” Orpheus asked, his soft voice futting through the even softer music. He didn’t know if L wanted to talk, but he had to try.
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Post by ®Hawkpath® on Jul 28, 2021 16:33:24 GMT -5
L wasn’t used to the uncertainty, either. He was used to being on top of things, or at last having a good idea what he needed to do and how he felt about it. This…this just felt wrong. He didn’t know how to handle it. He didn’t know how to begin to deal with it. It shouldn’t have mattered so much…it was just a House person. He didn’t even know about Elpis. He looked down. Part of him wanted to avoid the question entirely. He could probably do it, too. Just say he was fine and leave it at that. But then Orpheus would worry. He wouldn’t make L talk, L knew that, but he would worry about him, and L didn’t want to make him do that. “Perhaps,” he said finally, biting his lip a little. “I am…physically unharmed. There seems to have been no lasting damage…”
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Transgender
strider
No mourners, no funerals
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Post by strider on Jul 28, 2021 16:40:48 GMT -5
Orpheus glanced at L, not wanting to take his gaze off of him. This was important. This needed to be handled with grace and care, because L was not an uncertain sort of person. He rarely needed to question his decisions, and though he was far more used to the idea of death than Orpheus was, Orpheus had a feeling that you could never forget the feeling of killing. It was not his hand that had plunged a fatal blow into Eurydice’s chest, but her death still rested on his shoulders. It was his fault, nobody else’s. He knew that sort of pain. L had been responsible for death, too, but in a very different way. The lives he cost had been to spare others. This was… this was different. This was knowing that you directly caused someone to lose their life. Even Orpheus couldn’t begin to imagine how that felt. “You know,” Orpheus began softly, searching L’s gaze, “Injury and suffering can come in the form of more than just physical wounds. We both know that.”
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Post by ®Hawkpath® on Jul 28, 2021 16:49:02 GMT -5
L almost wanted to look away, but he resisted. He met Orpheus’ gaze, his expression cautious. He knew that was true,..he knew that he needed to pay attention to the mental side effects, too. But he didn’t know where to start. “I’m not the one who was injured,” he replied before he could think better of it. Then he really did look away. Maybe if they didn’t talk about it, it would go away. Maybe if he could ignore the feeling of warm blood spurting from an open wound he’d just created… He had killed someone. A House person, maybe, but still a person. He couldn’t ever take it back. He couldn’t ever be someone who had never directly killed anyone before again. He didn’t know what to say about it…or what to do now.
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Transgender
strider
No mourners, no funerals
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Post by strider on Jul 28, 2021 16:54:46 GMT -5
Orpheus breathed out, searching L’s gaze for another long moment before giving a firm shake of his head. He wouldn’t let L carry this burden alone, even if he wasn’t going to make him talk about it. They both knew what had happened, and Orpheus knew L well enough to know how he likely felt about it. This was not a secret that L could hide from Orpheus, even if he wanted to. “Didn’t you make me promise, once,” Orpheus breathed, not letting up the gentle tune issuing from his fingers, “not to lie to you and tell you I’m fine when I’m not? I think the same goes for you. You don’t have to talk about it, but… but don’t tell me you’re fine when you aren’t. Don’t tell me you’re not injured when you’re clearly suffering. It doesn’t matter that it’s not a physical injury – the worst wound I ever suffered was a mental one, and you nursed me back to health after it. I’m not leaving you alone with this.”
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Post by ®Hawkpath® on Jul 28, 2021 20:59:24 GMT -5
L breathed out slowly, glancing up to meet Orpheus’ eyes again, his own searching uncertainly for…he didn’t know what. He didn’t know what he wanted. He breathed out, curling a little closer in on himself. The more he actually tried to think about it, the more he remembered doing it…stabbing forwards, pouring all his strength into the blow. It had been intentional. He had made the decision to end a life, and then he’d gone through with it. “I shouldn’t care so much,” he managed after a long moment, his voice low as he stared at the floor. “Logically, I mean. It was in clear self defense. He was an active threat to us both…he was going to kill you. He was killing you. I have nothing to feel guilty about. If this had happened in my world, the vast majority of people would agree that I did nothing wrong. I…I did the right thing. I didn’t have a choice…right?” He curled his hands close to his chest. “Or…am I rationalizing? People do that. People say they didn’t have a choice all the time…would I arrest myself, given the chance?”
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Transgender
strider
No mourners, no funerals
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Post by strider on Jul 29, 2021 21:19:14 GMT -5
Orpheus watched L, unsure how to respond. Unsure if there was a way for him to make things better, because he couldn’t change the past. He forced himself to replay the moment in his head. Seeing L with the knife, L lunging forward, L… L had barely been able to stand up. He had been looking at Damon’s shoulder, not his heart. Which meant… Orpheus’ eyes went wide at the realization. L, even under the influence of some sort of drug, would never be the type to kill when he could temporarily disable. Which meant that it had been an accident. It didn’t change the fact that L had killed someone, but at least it would take the intent off his conscience. “It’s okay that you care,” Orpheus murmured, watching him. “Actually, I’d be a lot more concerned if you didn’t care at all. And it was in self-defense, but… Λ, I don’t think you did it on purpose. You could barely stand up straight, you weren’t in any position to be aiming well. I saw where you were looking, and it… it wasn’t where the knife went. It wasn’t on purpose. I know you, love.” It didn’t make it better. Orpheus knew it made little to no difference at all. “Would you arrest someone who was killing both in self-defense and on accident? Because it seems to me that, if someone like that really were to spend time in jail, it would be a short time. And everyone around them would be telling them that what happened wasn’t their fault. Not really.”
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Post by ®Hawkpath® on Jul 29, 2021 21:28:06 GMT -5
L breathed in, not quite meeting Orpheus” gaze. He didn’t know what to say…he didn’t know how to explain that the knew he shouldn’t be bothered, but he was. He couldn’t stop thinking about it. He had been aiming…he thought he’d been aiming for the heart. That was where the knife had gone, right? It wasn’t a likely target it hit by mistake, and L was extremely familiar with human anatomy. He’d have known where to strike to kill. He had to have meant it. He had to. He glanced up as Orpheus spoke, eyes wide. He head guessed that Orpheus would try to help, but…he hadn’t known what he would say. He bit his lip lightly, looking down again. “I…I did mean to,” he managed after a moment, a small tremble to his voice. “I must have. The heart isn’t a large target…the chances of hitting it in a fluke accident…and I know how…” He closed his eyes, trying to keep his voice carefully logical. He did want to make this harder on Orpheus. “I might take home in, for a while,” he replied after a moment. “For questioning, and their own protection. But…no. I wouldn’t arrest them, no.”
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Transgender
strider
No mourners, no funerals
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Post by strider on Jul 29, 2021 21:50:06 GMT -5
Orpheus searched L’s eyes. He knew what he had seen. He knew who L was as a person. He wasn’t the sort to kill anyone intentionally as long as there was another way out. Even if his logic weren’t working perfectly, he would have tried to figure out how to disarm Damon without killing him. Of that, Orpheus had no doubt. “I know you don’t believe me,” Orpheus murmured after a long moment, shaking his head, “but I saw where you were looking. It wasn’t his heart, Λ. I don’t know if it was chance that strayed your arm that way or the House, but I know for a fact that it wasn’t your intent to kill him. What… what, exactly, do you remember?” His brow furrowed as he looked at L, uncertain what he had to combat in order to convince L that what he had seen was true. He hadn’t seen L aim to kill. Orpheus doubted himself, often, but he was convinced about this. “The chances are low, I know that,” he added, crossing the room so he could sit right next to L instead of speaking to him from across the room. “But there are things that still happen, no matter how low the chances are. You know that better than anyone. I know for a fact that you didn’t aim to kill. I saw you.” Orpheus didn’t know how many times he would have to repeat it before L would accept it, but he would keep saying it until he did.
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Post by ®Hawkpath® on Aug 3, 2021 22:43:26 GMT -5
“It’s not really a matter of not believing you,” L protested, glancing up at Orpheus again and searching his eyes. “It’s not as though I think you’re lying. I just don’t…remember it that way, and I’m me, and you’re not me. I don’t…” He fell silent, letting Orpheus speak. Has he really been looking at the shoulder? He closed his mind, trying to remember. He felt the couch shift as Orpheus sat down next to him, and automatically shifted so he was leaning lightly against him, seeking out his warmth just like he had after the blizzard room, before he’d even began to trust Orpheus. “I just remember thinking…that I was probably dying, and I needed to save you before I finished,” he breathed after a moment, keeping his eyes closed. “And I thought that if I killed him, he’d stop. And then…I just tried to hit him with the knife. But I did think about killing him. I know I did.” He couldn’t erase that. He didn’t think he was misremembering…it had been a very clear thought in an ocean of mist.
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Transgender
strider
No mourners, no funerals
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Post by strider on Aug 3, 2021 23:24:30 GMT -5
“I know I can’t read your mind,” Orpheus replied softly, searching L’s gaze. “I know I can’t know what you were thinking, but… I have to ask. Did you think about killing him before or after the knife was in his chest?” If L hadn’t thought about killing him until the knife had hit its mark, then he couldn’t have killed him on purpose. Orpheus didn’t know if that was the most sound logic he had ever used, but… he knew L. He didn’t know if L would be able to remember everything, given how discombobulated he had been, but… Orpheus knew he wouldn’t have killed anyone willingly. There was no room in Orpheus’ mind to doubt that. There had been plenty of occasions where L could have killed someone and had instead chosen to spare them. Or, perhaps, give them a really good kick in the head. No matter how mentally impaired by the House, Orpheus founded he doubted L’s ability to commit murder intentionally. “I’m glad you didn’t die,” Orpheus added after a long moment. “I didn’t know what was happening to you, and… I was scared. I was really scared that it was something I couldn’t help fix…”
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Post by ®Hawkpath® on Aug 6, 2021 21:27:56 GMT -5
L blinked, startled by the question. Had he had that thought before he’d actually stabbed him? Or had that come afterwards? He tried to think. It shouldn’t have been hard…he knew it shouldn’t. It was a very simple question. Before or after? “I…I don’t remember,” he breathed, looking up at Orpheus. He shook his head a little. “I don’t know. I should know that. But I don’t.” He looked down again. He wished it were easier to explain what had happened in his head, but it just…wasn’t. “Do you really believe that it wasn’t intentional?” He managed after a moment, voice soft, staring at his hands. They were no longer covered in blood, but he couldn’t help seeing them as though they were.
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Transgender
strider
No mourners, no funerals
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Post by strider on Aug 7, 2021 17:52:54 GMT -5
“I really believe that,” Orpheus confirmed, taking L’s hand and squeezing it as gently as he could manage. “I saw where you were looking. I know I already said that, but I need you to hear me. You may have thought about killing him, but I don’t think the thought even occurred to you until the deed was already done. I know he died at your hands, but it makes a difference if it was intentional or not. And you, love, are as far from a murderer as I can imagine.” Orpheus knew that L would kill if he had to. He knew that he was capable of it, knew that, if there really were no other way out, L would do what needed to be done. Orpheus wasn’t sure if he would have the strength. But L would, even if those lives would haunt him for the rest of his life. This situation was different. There was nothing Orpheus was more certain about than the fact that this death had been an accident. L was capable of killing, but not cold blooded murder.
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Post by ®Hawkpath® on Aug 7, 2021 23:06:06 GMT -5
L watched Orpheus take his hand. He didn’t pull away…it was grounding, a little. It felt right. What Orpheus was saying…it wasn’t what L had thought he remembered, but he had to admit his memories of it weren’t good. He couldn’t even think how he’d ended up with his hands tied… And hadn’t he thought that if it were Orpheus’ word against irrefutable evidence, he’d take Orpheus’ word? This evidence, it wasn’t even irrefutable. He swallowed, then looked up, meeting Orpheus’ gaze. “I hear you,” he said quietly. “I believe you. Even if I did really remember how it had happened…even if I hadn’t been the way I was, I’d believe you.” He shook his head a little. “Do you…want to do a room?”
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Transgender
strider
No mourners, no funerals
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Post by strider on Aug 8, 2021 1:08:24 GMT -5
Orpheus searched L’s gaze, uncertain why L was willing to believe him over what he thought he remembered, but… he was grateful. He hoped it meant that L wouldn’t beat himself up over Damon’s death. If he did… then Orpheus was just going to have to remind him that it had been an accident. That it had been in self defense, too, and it wasn’t L’s fault that he’d been drugged and missed. It was manslaughter at the absolute worst, and even that was a stretch. Orpheus didn’t believe that very many people deserved to die, but he did think that Damon was likely one of them. “Do you feel up to doing a room?” Orpheus asked, giving L’s hand a gentle squeeze and searching his dark eyes. “I don’t want you to do anything you aren’t prepared for, but… I’d like a room, I think. Only if you’re up for it. I could use a little bit of excitement.”
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Post by ®Hawkpath® on Aug 9, 2021 16:28:13 GMT -5
Though there were a lot of downsides to L’s work, he had to admit that one good thing was his learned ability to move on from things. Even things that would never, ever be forgotten. This was not the first death he was responsible for. This would not be the last. And though it being direct hurt, certainly…he could be okay. He would be okay. “I think a room is precisely what I need,” he decided, standing up and offering Orpheus a hand. “I hope it’s not the sort we just did, but…even so, it will at least be different. The House isn’t typically that repetitive. I’m surprised it still has ideas for new rooms after all this time. Unless, of course. It’s simply reusing them on different blinkers…still, I’ve been in 302 rooms now, and not one has been an exact repeat.”
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Transgender
strider
No mourners, no funerals
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Post by strider on Aug 9, 2021 23:29:36 GMT -5
“Interesting,” Orpheus mused, pulling L towards the hallway. “I’m always impressed that you manage to keep track of how many rooms you’ve done and blinks you’ve had. You’ve… had a lot more blinks than you’ve done rooms. Is that because you blink out and blink in again during the same room, or because you’ve spent a lot of time in the living room, or both?” He figured that distracting L from what just happened might be helpful, and there was the added bonus of getting to hear L’s voice as he went through some of his theories with Orpheus. Orpheus had found a long time ago that if he asked the right questions, L’s theorizing was nearly inexhaustible. He had a feeling that now was a good time for it. L needed the distraction and Orpheus needed the reassurance that L was right there beside him and that they were, for the moment, safe.
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Post by ®Hawkpath® on Aug 11, 2021 12:33:54 GMT -5
L considered the question. It was one he’d thought about before, of course, though not quite as in depth as some things, mostly because he thought it made sense. Still…it was an interesting phenomenon, and he understood what Orpheus was trying to do. A distraction was welcome, and his mind latched into it almost instantly. “Some of both,” he told him, letting himself be pulled towards the hallway as he spoke. “Interestingly, it almost seems like there’s a pattern to it. Not an exact one, but it seems to go back and forth. If I’ve been blinking in and out of the same room a lot, I’m more likely to make it through a solid blink. That could just be coincidence, though, if you flip a coin and it lands on heads for a while it’s more likely to land on tails the longer it does. The most interesting part is that it’s actually changed over time, slowly. I used to blink in and out a lot when I was first blinking, and now it rarely happens at all. Still…since I don’t usually do multiple rooms per blink, it added up.”
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