ᴛʜᴇꜱᴇ ᴀʀᴇ ᴛʜᴇ ᴅᴀʏꜱ ᴛʜᴀᴛ ʙɪɴᴅ ʏᴏᴜ ᴛᴏɢᴇᴛʜᴇʀ, ꜰᴏʀᴇᴠᴇʀ - H&S

It was getting late. It was hard to tell the passage of time except by the sound of footsteps outside the door and the food that was always brought to Nico at what he assumed were regular intervals. There was no window, of course. The crew wasn’t that foolish.
Nico sighed, setting aside the drawing of Sazed. He needed something to get his mind off the situation and thinking about the past was too heavy. Thinking about the future was even worse. What was left, other than to draw what was currently happening? Only… the future he was frightened of was quickly becoming the present. As bored as Nico was with just sitting on the bed and letting the days pass, he didn’t want to start training. He didn’t want to have to figure out the rules, only to have them change on him at a moment’s notice. He didn’t want to play Kelsier’s game, sure to be more complicated and crueler than even Minos’. Minos had cared about him. Minos had, in his own way, loved him. And Kelsier… from the way Kelsier looked at him, he hated him. He pushed the drawings under the bed, well aware he was going to need to find a more permanent hiding spot for them soon. He felt his back up against the wall, leaning against the leg of the bed, his forehead pressed up against his knees.
And then the knock came and Nico rose to his feet more out of habit than any wish to actually stand and face Kelsier. Training would be worse if he made Kelsier wait.
Wordlessly, he opened the door, unintentionally moving back a few steps at the sight of Kelsier right there. He wanted to turn and run, but there was nowhere to go. He hadn’t promised not to kill Kelsier. He couldn’t do that. But he knew he wasn’t going to try, not until he thought he had any chance at all at winning. And… though he didn’t trust Kelsier, though he didn’t want to train, though everything in him was screaming that he was going to get himself killed, he wanted to learn how to burn properly. If only so he could make the decision about whether he wanted to burn or flare.
He hadn’t said anything. Was that a transgression Kelsier would view as insubordination? When did the punishments start? Now, or the first time he messed up? Had he already messed up?
Nico felt his mind freeze over, survival instinct taking over entirely. He dipped his head, staring at Kelsier’s feet instead of his eyes, his entire body tense and ready to be commanded. Respect. Discipline. Not dying.
Eyes blank, he waited for another master to take him into his grasp, to hone him into a weapon for causes he’d be forced to believe in. There was no way out. There never had been.

Nico allowed himself only a quick glance up at Kelsier. He didn’t know what to think of the man. He didn’t know what to expect. Who was Kelsier, other than the man who had killed Bianca and spared Nico not once, but three times? Could the third time even be counted? Nico pressed his palm to his temple, trying to get the thought to go away.
If he had known what Kelsier expected to see, if he had known what Kelsier expected him to be… Nico would have merely looked away. He was nobody. He was a weapon. He was what he had to be to survive. He was a boy who had become a bonfire, burning with anger and hatred and everything he needed to keep himself going. Now that the flame had been extinguished? What was he? He knew he wasn’t the boy he’d been before. Kelsier’s assessment was oddly correct. What he was was scared. Nothing else.
He fought the urge to step back as he heard Kelsier’s voice. Ready? Could he tell the truth? Could he tell Kelsier that as curious as he was, he was never going to be ready? How could one be ready for something as terrible as training? He had no frame of reference for what training could be other than what he had been to, and the promises Kelsier had made about his own training methods… Nico wasn’t going to believe them. When Minos pretended to be lenient, it was always a trap.
Instead, he dipped his head. Kelsier would require him to talk at some point, but for now he was content to stay in silence instead. It felt safer that way, to not let loose anything that could incriminate him or set Kelsier off. His dark gaze searched Kelsier’s for half a moment before he cast his gaze down again, waiting for the first taste of agony. Was training happening here? Or were they letting him outside somewhere? Was he going to be using metals? Real ones, not whatever the bronze Marsh had given him was. He kept the questions to himself. Better to just observe and adapt for now.

Nico crept out of his room behind Kelsier, making sure to close the door behind him. His shoulders were hunched forward, but as he walked past the rest of the crew he forced them back, trying not to show how scared he was. He saw the way they looked at him. He knew what they thought. It was, surprisingly, incredibly complimentary of them. The suspicion in their eyes meant that they saw him as a threat. They thought he actually could hurt Kelsier if he were going to try. Fortunately for everyone involved, he wasn’t going to try to hurt Kelsier. At least… not tonight. And if they were training… maybe not ever. Except he did have a history of leaving his trainers dead on the ground behind him. Maybe they actually had a reason to be worried. Killing Kelsier had been Nico’s life goal for… for two years. So why did the possibility of trying to kill him again raise an anxious knot in Nico’s stomach? He was overthinking this.
He looked at the crew out of the corner of his eye, gaze catching on the boy hiding behind the gruff older man who had seemed especially critical. What was his name again? Nico was having a hard time remembering, he hadn’t exactly gotten solid introductions, and the kid hadn’t been on guard duty. No wonder. Nico could probably take him in a fight, easy. They wouldn’t want to put the kid in danger, even if Nico never made it any further than down the stairs.
Nico didn’t know any of these men well enough to read their expressions, but he could sense the hostility. How dare Kelsier decide to train Nico? How dare he put the crew at risk like that? How dare Nico have the audacity to survive? I didn’t intend to, he wanted to tell them, I always thought I’d end up dead at the wrong end of one of your swords. But as long as the Survivor was dead, it wouldn’t have mattered.
He avoided looking at Hammond. Hammond had been kind. As had Sazed, but Sazed hadn’t wormed any secrets out of Nico.
Stepping outside was like stepping into another world entirely. Goosebumps rose along Nico’s arms as he paused to take a look around, eyes closing for just a moment at the feeling of the mist swirling around him. He wished he had tin. He almost lost Kelsier in the few moments he had stopped to take in the environment, but he was quick to follow, staying in Kelsier’s shadow. Doing his best not to be seen by anyone. It was a reflex at this point, to hide in shadows. To use the mist like a shield.
When Kelsier stopped, Nico hung back a few feet, staying under the alcove of a nearby building, only just within Kelsier’s line of sight. Minos would have yelled at him for that, but maybe that was part of the point. He was testing the boundaries. Best to learn quickly what elicited punishment, and what punishment could be.
“I’m not afraid of the mist.” He spoke without thinking, but he found he didn’t wish to take it back. The implication, however, was there: I’m not afraid of the mist. If I’m afraid, it’s of you.

Nico tried to hide his smirk in the split second Kelsier failed to notice him. He hadn’t actually expected Kelsier not to spot him immediately, but knowing that he could hide, even a little bit, felt like an accomplishment. And then, just like that, training began. No more time for anything as trivial as hiding for half a second and taking pride in it.
The vial. His gaze darted right, then left, then up, and then straight ahead, all in the span of a second. He was tense, every muscle poised to react to some sort of test. It would be easier if he had tin or pewter, but he darted forward to grab the vial, then fell back a few steps, downing the vial as quickly as he could and quickly flaring tin and pewter at the same time. Then iron and steel, keeping an eye out for a blue line that meant a projectile or some other form of attack.
Eyes narrowed, he looked at Kelsier, trying to figure out what kind of test this was. How he had failed. What he could fix. Was he supposed to be the one to attack? His eyes widened slightly as another couple of seconds passed and nothing flew at him. No attack came, even from Kelsier himself.
His head was already starting to pound with the amount of information coming in at once. The world was too bright and too loud, and the lines connecting him to every source of metal were far too bright as he flared. There were too many of them, too. Things that were far enough away that wouldn’t have even registered if he’d been burning normally.
Nico straightened up, still tense and obviously expecting some sort of attack. He grit his teeth, eyes widening as another several seconds passed with nothing. He’d forgotten what it was like to flare so many metals at once, though that had been his life for… well, as long as he’d been with Minos. As soon as he let down his guard, he knew some sort of attack was coming. And if he didn’t handle it properly, a punishment.
Kelsier had said he wouldn’t train like Minos had. Did that mean there wasn’t an attack coming? Was Nico in trouble for expecting one? His dark gaze raked over Kelsier’s face, desperately trying to read him, to figure this out. Figuring out what he was supposed to do, what the rules were here, was the difference between life and death.
Bronze. Was that the trick? His eyes narrowed and he reached to burn the unfamiliar fifth metal. It flared to life, sensing… sensing someone several streets down burning… something, he didn’t know enough to tell metals apart yet, and Kelsier burning… nothing? What was this?
Quickly, Nico extinguished his metals (with the exception of bronze, that one seemed useful for now), hoping that was the right thing to do. He felt a touch of exhaustion weigh on him from the sudden lack of pewter, but he did his best to try to ignore it.

Stop. As simple as that, Nico immediately ceased everything he’d been doing and turned his gaze wholly on Kelsier. Stop was an order. Not one he could recall Minos ever giving him before, especially not in that tone of voice, but an order nonetheless. He extinguished bronze last, feeling something in the pit of his stomach besides the bronze stores. What was that? He elected to ignore it for now, because Kelsier was probably burning bronze, and he’d be able to see if Nico directly defied an order. He stared up at Kelsier with wide, dark eyes, trying to figure out what, exactly, he’d done wrong.
Those eyes narrowed a touch as he heard Kelsier’s explanation. No random attacks? How was one supposed to learn anything if not directly from the heat of battle? That was the only way to teach. The only way Nico had ever seen. The proper way to teach a Mistborn, if Minos could be believed. Nico was beginning to doubt he could.
Wordlessly, he met Kelsier’s gaze. He had done it wrong. He had expected an attack, and he wasn’t supposed to expect one. That was a rule, then. One that Nico had broken, one that would be punishable. And yet… Kelsier wasn’t moving towards any sort of punishment that Nico recognized.
It was hard to imagine anyone training Kelsier. Although Nico knew he had only Snapped in Hathsin, it seemed to him that Kelsier had been this intimidating and powerful from day one. The man who had killed Bianca had never needed to be trained. He had been born Death itself. It was difficult being forced to admit that the man he’d seen that night, the man he had later fought, was the Survivor of Hathsin. The man who now stood in front of him, speaking of mentors… that was just Kelsier.
“Promise,” he echoed softly, his hand curling into a fist at his side. Did he believe Kelsier? It was difficult to, after everything. But everything he’d done since bringing Nico here seemed to line up with what he’d told him. There would be none of Minos’ punishments. There would be no random attacks. Why?
“You think I can’t handle it, don’t you?” his voice was soft, but there was an intensity behind him that he found was nearly out of his control. “You think I can’t handle being trained like a normal Mistborn.” He didn’t know how to feel about that. All he knew was that – apparently – Minos had been right about how difficult it was to train Nico. He was a lost cause.
Or maybe this had all been a farce from the beginning. Maybe this “training” was just a way to… to do something. To weaken Nico’s resolve or worm his way into his mind. Nico didn’t know for sure, but he found he trusted this even less. He didn’t know what to expect. He didn’t know Kelsier’s motives, he didn’t know if there even was another way to train someone.
“It… doesn’t matter,” he choked out, staring at the ground. “I’ll do whatever you ask me.” Please, forget that I questioned you. Please. The last part was sent off like a silent prayer, to whatever god may be watching. But the Lord Ruler was god. He wouldn’t send help to a boy working with the Survivor.

Nico hesitated, staring at Kelsier almost as though he had grown a second head. That wasn’t… training. Not really. But if that was how this was going to go, then Nico was going to obey. He was going to go through this exactly as Kelsier wanted him to, and maybe if he did that, then this whole thing wouldn’t be as bad as he was expecting. It wouldn’t be pleasant, of course, he wasn’t that unrealistic, but maybe, just maybe, it wouldn’t be torturous.
Was Kelsier serious about informing him of when they were going to fight enemies? About telling him what to expect? Once again, he found he didn’t believe that. Time would tell what training was really like, and for the first time in his life, Nico was hoping to be proven wrong. It seemed oddly possible that Kelsier was a kinder man than Nico had pinned him as, at least towards the people he had decided not to kill. How had Nico passed from one category to the other? He winced, looking down to see his hands clenched so tightly into fists his nails were threatening to break skin again. He made his hands relax, then looked up at Kelsier like he could glean some idea of what was happening just by reading into his expression. There had to be a trap of some sort.
Did Kelsier regret taking on an apprentice? Did he regret that there was now someone watching his every move, searching for some kind of falsehood? Or was he going to enjoy this, enjoy watching Nico fail, enjoy feeding him the tiniest bit of hope that training was going to be tolerable rather than painful? Nico grit his teeth, waiting to see what he was told to do.
You can. The phrasing had obviously been intentional. Was it that he hadn’t intended this to be an order? Was he really giving Nico a choice, or was this a different kind of order? Nico decided to treat it as the latter, as that gave the least opportunity to get in trouble. Maybe one day he’d start taking risks, trying to see how far he could take things, but now was not that day. Now he was learning the ropes, trying to figure Kelsier out, trying to learn how not to turn the Survivor’s wrath on him. It had been… well, surprisingly easy, thus far. Nico couldn’t shake the feeling it wouldn’t last.
Bronze flared to life in the pit of his stomach, and, like the other metals, he couldn’t regulate it. It was one constant force of burning, his body trained to flare as hard as he could at all times. He watched Kelsier carefully, tilting his head and narrowing his eyes as he watched. The difference was near blinding, though perhaps that was because Nico himself was flaring. The intensity was… well, awe-inspiring. And frightening.
“Why-” Nico cut himself off before the question could slip past his lips. It was probably better to just watch and see, to avoid asking questions.

The difference between burning and flaring in other people was obvious. Nico could see the way the metal seemed to vibrate differently, he could see the intensity change as Kelsier switched between. It was interesting to watch, though Nico found he was frightened to try ‘burning’ on his own. Could he do it if Kelsier asked him to, or would he be punished because he couldn’t? Would it be possible to save some of his metals for later to try burning on his own instead of just flaring? Kelsier wouldn’t like that, probably. The crew definitely wouldn’t. And yet… could they tell how much of any given metal he had left?
Nico was torn from his thoughts by the question. He needed to ask his question now or come up with one that was passable.
“I don’t understand why someone would want to burn rather than flare,” he managed after a long moment, crossing his arms as though he could protect himself that way. It easily could have been an arrogant gesture, a challenge, but from Nico it was a way to make himself smaller and more unobtrusive. Not that being unobtrusive was an option when all of Kelsier’s attention was on him. Still, he expected some sort of punishment for daring to question what Kelsier was teaching him. He knew the punishment would have been worse if he had flat out disobeyed, but he wasn’t looking forward to stoking Kelsier’s anger with the question, either.
After a long moment, Nico extinguished his bronze as he waited for either an answer or a punishment. Or, perhaps, both. He reached down mentally to stoke his pewter and tin, wanting to see how much he had left of each. Iron and steel would come in handy later, but he had a feeling he would need pewter and tin soon. After all… it was pewter that Kelsier had chosen to burn for Nico to watch with his bronze.
There was… there was something else there, something Nico had never noticed before. It felt like bronze in the pit of his stomach. He frowned. More metals? Was that even possible? He tried to refrain from shaking his head, trying to give no outward acknowledgement of his puzzlement. He probed a bit deeper, eyes widening as he found yet another metal store. Would Kelsier be upset if he used these new metals? Was this the test? Nico couldn’t think of a situation in which Kelsier wouldn’t be angry, so he decided to try it.
Zinc flared to life in the pit of his stomach and he yelped as he found himself accidentally pushing it on Kelsier, stoking his anger with absolutely no clue what he was doing. He staggered back, immediately extinguishing it. His first instinct was to apologize and run forward, but he quickly squashed that down. That was a sign of weakness and would be punished. Instead, he stood where he was, frozen and staring wide-eyed at Kelsier, almost trembling with fear and uncertainty.

Nico listened, trying to understand. He wasn’t going to take Kelsier’s words as the truth – he didn’t trust him enough for that – but he was going to at least consider them. And, when he had eventually figured out how to burn instead of flare, he was going to decide for himself which was better. If what Kelsier said was true… there were drawbacks to flaring that Nico had considered drawbacks to Allomancy in general. Was it possible that they were just side effects of flaring? That the near constant exhaustion he felt after burning wasn’t normal, that other Mistborn didn’t experience it? He had a lot of questions, but he saved them to ponder over later. It was going to take a lot for Nico to start asking Kelsier questions unless he asked on accident, like he had here. He was still tense, waiting for the anger to bubble up.
When it came, brought on by Nico’s own attempt at using an unfamiliar metal, he staggered back, reaching for a weapon he didn’t have anymore. He saw the dagger in Kelsier’s hand, the expression in his eyes. He was going to die here. Only a week after coming close the first time… why was he so much more frightened of it now than he had been when he’d thrown himself at Kelsier’s dagger? What had changed?
Hope. It was difficult to admit it to himself, but he had nope now. He had a reason to keep going, keep trying. He had a reason to wake up, and a reason to try to listen to what Kelsier said, even if half of it was lies. Two sets of lies that Nico could compare against his own experience of the world was better than one set of lies that he’d been terrified into believing whole heartedly. He had a chance here to figure out what the world was really like. The idea of losing that now, the idea of dying scared and confused… it frightened him more than he cared to admit.
Somehow, almost as quickly as the anger had come, it was gone. Nico took in a shaky breath, searching Kelsier’s expression for any sign of the rage that had darkened it only moments before. He eyed the dagger, still nervous, but he had to admit he was grateful that Kelsier had thought to take a step back. Nico needed space. He needed room to think and consider and try to figure out what was going on here. Why he hadn’t been punished for that. His eyes narrowed slightly and he obeyed, reaching for the opposite Kelsier had referred to. He almost went to burn it, but he couldn’t help remembering the rage that had slipped across Kelsier’s features. Nico didn’t know how he’d chosen an emotion to pull on. What if he pushed on the wrong one now? What if he weakened Kelsier’s anger and that was taken as an act of aggression?
The very fact that Allomancy could manipulate emotions was terrifying, though Nico did his best to avoid thinking about the implications. He hadn’t been taught these metals for a reason. Though he still wanted to think the best of Minos, the truth was… he was afraid of someone using this emotional Allomancy on him. Chances were high he’d already been exposed to it.
“How do I know what it will affect?” he asked after a long moment, tone wary. He was still waiting for Kelsier to get upset and decide to punish him. The more questions he asked, the more likely that seemed. “I… I burned zinc, and I was thinking about how it was probably a test, that you would be angry that I hadn’t tried it sooner, or that you’d be mad that I tried it at all without explicit instruction… and… that happened.” His eyes were narrowed as he searched Kelsier’s expression for answers. Or, perhaps, confirmation that his questions were unwelcome.

Nico hesitated for a very long moment, unsure where this was going. He wanted… he wasn’t sure what he wanted. He hadn’t been allowed to want anything for a very long time. When life had changed so much he hadn’t really been old enough to know what he wanted out of life. He had wanted, on a day-to-day basis, to spend time with his sister and win the affection of his father. He had wanted to exist in a world where life kept going, where maybe one day he’d be old enough to attend the balls his father went to and hosted. He had wanted to be able to play with who he had wanted, even if they were skaa.
After that, he had wanted revenge. He had wanted to kill Kelsier for killing Bianca. He knew now that even that wouldn’t bring her back. It wouldn’t do anything but make him a killer. And the more he got to know Kelsier… the more he was certain that killing him was probably a bad idea. He didn’t trust him. He didn’t even like him. He was the Survivor of Hathsin, and he had taken away Nico’s sister. But for right now… right now he wasn’t going to kill him. He wasn’t even certain he’d be capable of it.
What he wanted now, he supposed, was to figure out the truth. To form his own worldview, to become his own person. Could he do that under Kelsier? Would Kelsier want him to believe exactly what he did? Would he lie to Nico? So far everything Kelsier had said could be proven just by the use of Allomancy. It was all things Nico could feel himself, things he could prove to himself. Still, it was better to be wary and not trust anything Kelsier told him without finding proof for it first. So long as Kelsier didn’t punish him for doubting him.
Very, very carefully, Nico began to burn brass. He didn’t Push on anything yet, he just watched and tried to figure out what he was touching. What did he want to Push? If he Soothed Kelsier’s anger, then Kelsier might think he was trying to win his trust artificially. Same issue with Soothing fear or doubt or really anything negative. He extinguished his brass, well aware that he was wasting it by flaring it without actually doing anything. He needed to think.
What made someone trust another person? Hope? No, he couldn’t Soothe Kelsier’s hope, that would just be cruel, even if it was only temporary. He hesitated for a long moment. Confidence? Yes… yes, confidence. That might be good to Soothe. It would just make Kelsier trust Nico less, if he even trusted him at all. It would make Kelsier doubt what he was doing here. If he doubted it… then he wouldn’t be able to accuse Nico of trying to win his trust through false measure. Nico wasn’t going to lie, even if it was through emotional allomancy. He was going to tell the truth – training him was a bad idea. If he Soothed Kelsier’s confidence, that would be an argument in favor of Nico’s opinion. There.
Brass flared to life in Nico’s stomach and he Pushed against Kelsier’s confidence, watching carefully as he did so. He was all too aware of the dagger in Kelsier’s hand. All too aware how wrong this could go. Kelsier’s promise didn’t mean anything to Nico. If Nico messed up, he knew Kelsier was going to punish him. Punishments could be worse than dying, sometimes.

Nico extinguished the brass as soon as he was told. Especially with emotional Allomancy, he was beginning to see that there might be some benefit to burning as opposed to flaring. Flaring was so much stronger, there was no… there was no subtlety to it. He couldn’t control how much he pushed or pulled at Kelsier’s emotions, just which emotion he impacted. Would he be able to control the strength of it if he learned how to burn the way he was supposed to? The way, it seemed, that most people did?
Vest to learn how to do it just in case, Nico reminded himself, because then he would at least have a choice between burning and flaring. If Kelsier was right and there were benefits to burning, he would quickly learn what those were. If he was wrong, then Nico could go back to flaring full time with no consequences. Of course… that assumed that training kept going like this. Assuming that training didn’t become the dreaded, painful thing Nico was familiar with.
He ignored the praise. He didn’t know what to make of it – if Minos ever praised him… pain flashed in his eyes and he immediately stopped the thought in its tracks.
“Because there’s enough of it to spare.” The words came out almost unbidden, and Nico flushed almost immediately after they escaped. He wouldn’t have slipped like that if he hadn’t been distracted with thoughts of Minos. “I don’t… mean that you’re overconfident. I just mean that…” he broke off, searching Kelsier’s gaze. He had asked a direct question. It was Nico’s duty to answer it as fully and honestly as he could. But would Kelsier be upset with his answer? Better he be upset with the answer than upset that Nico didn’t give one.
“I couldn’t choose fear. Or anger, or frustration, or anything else negative. If I chose any of those, then you would feel better than you actually feel. And that’s how a smart enemy would choose to try to get you on their side. They would try to make you trust them by making you feel better than you actually do. If I… if I Soothed your fear, or your anger, you might start thinking that this is a good idea, that I might be a good person, and I’m not. On the other hand… I couldn’t choose something you don’t have a lot of.” He shoved his hands in his pockets, staring at the ground. “You smile a lot, Survivor, but I don’t think you’re particularly happy. So joy was off the table. What’s left? Confidence.” He lifted his gaze up, managing to meet Kelsier’s eyes for just a moment. “I promised you I wouldn’t lie. So I didn’t Soothe anything that would make this seem better. I Soothed what was likely to produce the truth about… about this.” He didn’t need Kelsier’s trust. He didn’t need the crew’s trust. But he had made a promise, and not lying was part of that.
Nico seemed to clam up almost immediately after he answered the question. He grew very still, gaze locked on the dagger Kelsier still held. Would he use it? Was Nico’s response satisfactory? He grit his teeth, waiting for the punishment to come. He… he wasn’t thinking like Minos, at least not now. Minos would have told him to Soothe Kelsier’s distrust, to worm his way into his good graces, to learn how to burn and then Soothe him ceaselessly into trusting him. It would work eventually, and he’d be right where Nico wanted him. Except… Nico didn’t want to kill him anymore. Killing him wouldn’t bring Bianca back. And it wouldn’t save anyone like her, either. If Kelsier were in the habit of killing kids, even noble ones, Nico would already be dead. Nothing he could have said would have been enough to stay Kelsier’s hand. But the Survivor had spared him. Killing him… killing him wouldn’t protect kids like Bianca. It would just hurt kids like the boy who had been thrown onto the street for the terrible crime of playing with Nico when they were both too young to understand.

Nico wasn’t sure what to make of Kelsier’s reaction. It wasn’t… well, it wasn’t what Minos’ would have been. Minos would have pointed out every last flaw in Nico’s thinking, berated him for being foolish, and then sent him to do some near-impossible task until he did it right. That was what training was like. Nico had to keep reminding himself that Kelsier had said he wasn’t like Minos, and so far he seemed to be staying true to his word. Nico wasn’t naïve. He knew that Kelsier would adopt Minos’ ways as soon as it was convenient for him. The important part right now, though, was that he hadn’t. And overreacting, flinching away from a punishment that wasn’t going to come, would only serve to make Kelsier act like Minos more quickly, as he learned that punishments worked.
Kelsier’s smile was still unnerving. Nico didn’t know how to read this one. It wasn’t the one he had given his crew when they had left. It wasn’t the one he had given Nico as he left him to die, nor the one he’d used when questioning him. This was a different smile, and Nico couldn’t figure out what it meant. Perhaps it wasn’t supposed to mean anything, except to Kelsier. Perhaps it wasn’t supposed to communicate anything at all, except that Kelsier could smile, and Nico hadn’t been able to genuinely smile in years. Since at least before Bianca died. Perhaps… well, perhaps even before that.
“It would be foolish to tell you that I can’t trust you,” Nico replied softly, dutifully keeping his eyes locked on the ground. It was respectful. He had to be respectful. “You already know that. You know I don’t trust you. Almost every piece of information you’ve given me has been provable. You don’t expect me to trust you on things I can’t prove. Not yet, at least.” He tensed, risking a glance up at Kelsier’s expression. “A more important message to give you is that you shouldn’t trust me. I don’t think you do, I’m not… I’m not stupid. But I think you trusted me with metals. Or… well, at the very least, you trusted yourself to stop me from doing harm with metals. Which is a bad idea, because, Survivor, you’re human just like everybody else. And this isn’t a risk you can get anything out of.”
Would that read as a challenge? Nico wasn’t sure. He was going off script, abandoning what Minos taught him, abandoning everything that would have been useful in a training session with Minos. He couldn’t get rid of it all – he would still obey immediately if given a task, would answer immediately if asked a question. But he wasn’t thinking about what answer Kelsier would want to hear. He wasn’t sure he could guess that, even if he tried. Besides, he had promised to be honest, and he wasn’t going to break his promise.
“You told me to Soothe you,” Nico replied bluntly, unsure if Kelsier was asking a question or not. It felt safer to answer as though he was. “You were going to come to some conclusion or another depending what I Soothed.” Everything was a test. Everything could be twisted around and used against him. Nico had learned to think things through, to take the past least likely to get him hurt later. He had promised not to lie. Being honest with his Allomancy felt like the best way to uphold that promise.
Nico tilted his head, surprised by Kelsier’s words. He didn’t understand. Not that he had believed Kelsier had some big plan behind trying to train him, but he hadn’t expected him to be this clueless. Nico remained silent, waiting for Kelsier’s next instruction.

Nico watched Kelsier, eyes narrowed. He didn’t understand what Kelsier’s goal was, here. He didn’t understand what Kelsier wanted, he just knew that this was his future. There was no getting out of it. If Kelsier trained him, if he ended up agreeing with him… he would live. Probably. But he’d be tied to Kelsier’s crew for the rest of his life either way. The only difference was how long his life was going to last. Nico wasn’t sure whether he was meant to be afraid. Training was different, so, so different than Nico had expected it to be. Kelsier wasn’t kind, that wasn’t a word Nico thought he could ever use to describe the Survivor, but he wasn’t… he wasn’t Minos.
Of course this could go wrong. In Nico’s eyes, it was almost bound to go wrong. Kelsier hadn’t thought this true, and Nico was an enemy. He was always going to be an enemy, unless he held the exact same beliefs as Kelsier. And the thing was… he didn’t want his head jammed with more beliefs that weren’t his own. Was that selfish of him? His life wasn’t his own anymore. The only thing he had to himself were his thoughts. As soon as he managed to extricate them from Minos’ web of lies.
“I’m not trying to tell you anything,” Nico replied, jaw clenching. “I’m just…” he trailed off. What was he doing? What had he wanted to accomplish with that? He had wanted to risk the least punishment from Kelsier. That was the honest truth.
Nico wasn’t sure how to feel about the fact Kelsier didn’t see it as a test. That didn’t seem… possible, if he were being honest with himself.
“You might not have meant it as a test,” Nico said eventually, keeping his eyes carefully on the ground, “but I think you would have thought about what I chose to Soothe, and you would’ve come to some conclusion or another.” He decided not to mention he had chosen what he had thought would guarantee him the least pain. Kelsier would figure out soon enough that most of his thought process operated on that central concept. Avoid pain. Everything else could come later.
Nico didn’t hope or believe it would end well. All he was trying to do was survive. It had never been easy for him, but he had a feeling it was going to be harder now than it had ever been before. Kelsier didn’t have a good reason to keep him alive. Even Minos had needed him, in a way. Which mean that the second he annoyed Kelsier, the second he did something that Kelsier didn’t like, he would be dead.
Very carefully, Nico turned on bronze, trying to figure out the difference between flaring and burning. He could see it when Kelsier did it, but he had no idea how to replicate it himself. He turned off bronze, trying to figure out which metal would be safest to burn. He was most familiar with pewter and tin, but would that make it harder? He didn’t really want to mess with copper or brass, especially if he had to mess with Kelsier’s feelings to do so.
After a long moment, he turned on pewter, focusing on trying to burn it… differently. Having no reference for what burning felt like, he just tried to turn down his flaring. Tried to picture it like a dial that he could just… turn. It didn’t feel like a dial, it felt like a switch. On or off. Frustrated, he turned off his pewter, looking to Kelsier for advice. It probably seemed like he hadn’t tried… would Kelsier be upset? Would he punish him? Nico hesitated, breath catching in his throat. He had… he had tried.

Nico searched Kelsier’s expression, waiting to see the anger there. Waiting for something to flare up, something more like Minos. He had promised to tell the truth. Wasn’t part of that believing that Kelsier was being honest with him, too? Kelsier had said he wasn’t Minos. So far, he hadn’t done anything Minos would have done. So why couldn’t Nico shake the feeling that this was all a trick? That Kelsier was watching him, secretly laughing as Nico tried and failed to navigate his invisible maze of rules. It wasn’t too difficult to believe. It was what Minos would have done, but he wouldn’t have pretended for quite so long. But Kelsier was crueler than Minos. He had left Nico to die that night. To die a slow, painful death from blood loss.
Eyes narrowed, Nico had questions. He wanted to ask so many things, wanted to figure this out, but he held his tongue. Minos hadn’t accepted questions. So far Kelsier had tolerated them, but Nico didn’t want to test his patience. His jaw clenched and he pushed the questions back before they could slip out.
“I believe you’re picking the metals you have either because you actually want to teach me with them, or because you’re trying to see how I react to them.” He wasn’t used to using bronze. He couldn’t afford to have it flaring at all times, because he was worried he would run out. Besides, it was distracting to see what Kelsier was burning when he was trying to focus on his own burning. Except when Kelsier showed him the difference between burning and flaring. That was… helpful. Nico could see the difference, even if he didn’t know how to recreate it. “Is it… acceptable to consider all the options without deciding that one must be the truth?” Nico asked after a long moment. It was his way of answering Kelsier’s question. He didn’t have the simple yes or no answer that Kelsier was looking for, but he had promised he’d tell him the truth. Well… this was his truth. He wouldn’t jump to any conclusions, but he would consider every option. Was that reading too much into Kelsier? Was that doing exactly what he was asking him not to do?
Anxiety clawed at Nico’s throat, and he did his best to push it away. He would learn better if he kept it at bay, if he didn’t do absolutely everything he could think of to try to please Kelsier like he would with Minos. He couldn’t just… do what Kelsier wanted. He didn’t know how, otherwise he’d be doing it.
Nico breathed out, trying to focus on the difference he had seen between burning and flaring. He didn’t dare turn on any of his metals yet – Kelsier hadn’t asked him to – but he was trying to come up with a plan of attack.
Ah. Two different commands. No… not commands. Kelsier wasn’t Minos, he probably didn’t want Nico thinking of them as commands.
Another deep breath. He flared pewter. The familiar burn built up in his chest, then he quickly extinguished it. He tried to burn it… differently. Tried to think of it as something separate. Tried to focus on it, tried to reach down and hold the pewter in his mind. Nothing happened. His brow creased just a little bit, and he tried to stoke a small flame, tried to strike a match instead of dousing it in gasoline and tossing a torch on top of it. It flared to life just like normal. Frustrated, he extinguished it, then tried to move to the next comm… strategy.
Start to flare. Stop it from reaching full intensity. Simple enough when described. He focused on his pewter, trying to flare but choke himself off before it reached full flare.
The burn stuttered in his chest for half a second before it became a full flare. Nico wasn’t even sure he’d felt anything less than what he was used to. It was probably just in his imagination. He was running low on pewter, but he wouldn’t let that stop him.

Nico tilted his head, considering Kelsier for a long moment. Did he believe him? Did he believe that Kelsier was just trying to teach him, not trying to hurt him? Not trying to trick him or play with him or… well, the possibilities were endless. People were cruel, and the Survivor of Hathsin moreso than most. Nico had experienced it firsthand. Still… he at least sounded earnest. There was no cold mockery in his tone. There was no sharp judgement, no reminder that he was failing, that he just needed to try harder. Nico shuddered as memories pressed in. He needed to focus on burning, or Kelsier was going to lose his patience.
He didn’t know why Minos had made him flare. He didn’t know what use it could have. He didn’t know why Minos had hidden metals from him. Wouldn’t he have been a more effective weapon if he’d known all of the tools he had on hand? Nico had yet to be Soothed in a way he could feel. He hadn’t noticed Breeze’s touch when the man had Soothed him before. Once he felt it, though, he would start realizing that it had been used on him before.
As it was, he didn’t quite understand why training didn’t feel like it was muffled. He thought at least part of it was the absence of a panic response, but… it was odd. Training usually felt like it happened behind a translucent curtain – he could recognize the things he was supposed to feel, he just… couldn’t feel them. If the feeling stayed away, he might ask Kelsier about it. If he ever got comfortable enough to do that. He shifted uncertainly, swallowing his thoughts and the question along with it. Maybe someday. But not now.
Nico had a feeling that Kelsier giving him permission to doubt him meant that Kelsier doubted everything Nico was saying as well. It made sense, but it also meant that even the tiniest slip up could mean Nico’s death. No, he couldn’t mess up. He had to tell the truth, like he had promised. Even when he didn’t want to. Even when the truth hurt. He closed his eyes for just a moment, trying to calm his wild thoughts.
“What?” He blinked, frowning a little bit. That feeling… that stutter, the tiniest breath he had felt… that was burning? Or… at least… almost burning?
He nodded after a long moment, uncertain why Kelsier wasn’t phrasing very much like an order. Regardless, Nico was going to obey what Kelsier said like it was an order. That still seemed like the best way to stay alive, and though he was terrified, he still wanted to hold onto life. Perhaps it was selfish of him, to waste Kelsier’s time by continuing to live.
Deep breath in. All he had to do was what he had just done. It wouldn’t be too hard, right? He turned on his pewter, trying to stop it right before he hit a full flare. All that seemed to do this time was extinguish the pewter. His brow creased and he tried again. And again. Twice more before his pewter ran out and he balled his hand into a fist at his side, trying to stop himself from punching something.
Okay, so… tin. Tin wouldn’t be that great a risk. Turn it on, try to choke it off as slowly and deliberately as he could. It went out. Again. Nothing. He cast a worried look at Kelsier, trying his best to hide his expression. Breathe. He had done it for half a moment before, how hard could it be to repeat the experience?
Nico’s eyes closed and he tried to feel what it was like to burn, tried to smother it without putting it out entirely. Nothing.