there was a rainflower love rant on the old forumsi saved it omg what, show me XD }
(italics and stuff are missing but)
^*^*^
Rainflower: How My Opinion Changed
An Essay by Wolfdawn
^*^*^
Rainflower is a widely hated she-cat. Admittedly, at one point, I was one of her haters.
After a while, the pale gray she-cat faded out of my view. However, I was flipping through Crookedstar's Promise and found myself re-evaluating her reactions to different things, and realized that many people don't truly look at her. They look at what Crookedstar saw, not what Rainflower saw. They were siding with the only opinion offered: Crookedkit/paw/jaw/star's. They didn't turn around and see what Rainflower was thinking. They were assuming that her character was cold, bitter, and selfish. They were biased with the book's opinion, and that's why they hate her. They didn't look at her actual self; they looked at the surface.
^*^*^
However, I have decided to forgive Rainflower. I re-read her most prolific scenes and lay away, thinking about what her point of view was like. I changed. I forgave her, because I realized that I understood her. She had issues with her emotions. She was distraught and angry at herself.
So, by now, you are tired of my endless rambling and wanting to read my actual essay/rant. So, let's begin.
^*^*^
Let's start from the beginning. Rainflower is the mother of Stormkit and Oakkit. It's obvious that Stormkit is the better warrior. And besides, all mother are biased, at least slightly. I know my mother, my friend's mothers, my enemy's mothers, and everyone else's mother is at least a little biased. This, like all mothers, was part of Rainflower's case file. She favored Stormkit. Stormkit knew this, and he ended up a snob. This was NOT Rainflower's fault. Stormkit was the one acting like he owned RiverClan and snapping at his brother. Rainflower was simply biased. She loved both kits equally, but she showed her love of Stormkit a little more. She did show Oakkit love, too. But her love for Stormkit showed more. Simple as that.
Rainflower wasn't shallow for believing that Stormkit would be her "handsome young warrior". It was a belief, and something like one of those mother-senses things told her that Stormkit would be the better warrior. Maybe it was his pounce, stature, and bravery that struck a cord in Rainflower. Another thing was his looks. Nothing wrong with that. She believed both her kits were beautiful/handome.
Now tell me, is your mother shallow for believing that you're better in math than say, your little brother? Or that zebra bow laying on the couch looks better in your sister's blonde hair than your brown hair? No. It's what she thinks. And who knows, it may be true. (But my brunette hair does look good in a zebra bow. Just saying.) Either of those statements could be true. Maybe both are true.
That's the case with Rainflower. Stormkit was more "athletic", per say, than Oakkit. Oakkit was more laid-back and thoughtful; Stormkit was on the ball, pouncing, hunting, and stalking. She loved them both for their unique qualities; she simply believed that Stormkit was a better warrior. And did she ever put Oakkit down? No. She praised them both.
Then, Stormkit decides to be a dumbo. He dragged his brother out of the camp when Oakkit clearly didn't want to go, and then, he says "let's go to SteppingStones!" Great idea. (Hear the sarcasm?)
And you know what? And it's all Stormkit's fault this happened.
He broke his jaw.
He NEARLY DIED. His face was screwed up for his entire life. He would never heal. Rainflower was distraught and horrified at the thought of her handome young warrior; she probably imagined he would have a horrible, lonely life because no one would love him because of his face. She went crazy with grief. She wasn't angry at Stormkit. She was mad at herself. In Rainflower's mind, it was her fault that Stormkit was injured. She was sleeping/doing something else and wasn't watching her sons when she was supposed to. She thought she was the one at fault. Rainflower had failed. And she hadn't failed herself.
She had failed one of the cats that mattered most to her.
Stormkit, her handsome son.
Rainflower thought this was all her fault. She was angry that she hadn't watched him. She went crazy with grief; this drove her towards the name change. Stormkit wasn't her son. The cat who was once Stormkit was the cat she failed, not her son. He was a cat with a crooked jaw, a cat who she had ultimately failed.
Maybe the name change wasn't about Stormkit's looks, actually. It could have been that Rainflower felt her life was spilt down the middle, and the peices wouldn't fit together because they were crooked. And then, her son was there.
^*^*^
Crookedstar's Promise, Page 52:
quote:
"She's grieving," Echomist murmured in his ear. "She doesn't realize what she's saying."
Rainflower was wrong. But she was crazy with grief, heartbroken, and she thought she was a failure. She was grieving. She didn't realize what she was actually saying. She was venting. The stress, pain, and grief finally got to Rainflower. She couldn't take anything anymore, like an overflowed river that flooded and destroyed a forest. The river and the forest both represent Rainflower. She was like the river, unable to hold much more. Then, she couldn't do it anymore and had to flood. She was also the forest in the way she destroyed herself. The grief, misery, and heartbreak was the river; her emotions. She was the forest, and finally, she was flooded and ruined by an overflowed river.
Rainflower went ahead and changed his name. Yes, she was wrong. But she held her head up through it, even though she was wrong. She went through with it.
She never set out to hurt Stormkit. She was hurting herself, and she never wanted to deliberately hurt her son. So then, it was done. His name was Crookedkit. Rainflower had done it. There was no going back. But she did this because she was in unbearable pain. In her dark little world, it was the only way to get all of her emotions out.
Then, Crookedkit runs away. He comes back, and you know what?
Crookedstar's Promise, page 112:
quote:
"Can I welcome back my kit?" Rainflower was waiting behind Birdsong. The elder scuttled out of the way. "Welcome home." The pale gray she-cat touched her muzzle lightly to Crookedkit's head. "I'm glad you're safe."
She welcomed him back.
Did you notice how sweetly she did it? She welcomed him kindly. She never said "I don't want you back" or anything. This quote helps seal the deal: Rainflower still loves Crookedkit, even though most of the time, she doesn't show it. She cares about him, and she even welcomed him back when he'd stupidly ran off and caused her so much agony. She loved him deep down inside. In the quote above, was she heartless? Was it heartless of her to welcome Crookedkit back?
And look. She even said, quote en quote, "I'm glad you're safe." I'm glad you're safe. How sweet is that? See, right there, this is proof Rainflower isn't heartless. She welcomed back the kit (and even told him that she was glad he was SAFE!) who had dumbly ran away and snapped her life in half. See? She still loves Crookedkit. She always loved him, even after the accident that WAS totally his fault.
Skip to when Crookedkit becomes an apprentice. Here's another quote.
Page 126:
quote:
Crookedpaw stared at his mother, his heart quickening as she [Rainflower] stood still and silent. Then, with a rush of relief, he watched her lift her muzzle and call his new name.
"Crookedpaw!"
Aww, look. She cheered his new name, even when Crookedpaw has lost faith in her. She loves him. She WAS proud of him. She felt horrible about how she'd failed him and changed his name; she was trying to make up for acting like that. And you know what? She cheered him on, calling his new name. That's pure sweetness. She felt bad, and she knew she'd done wrong; this was the first step to making it all up to the very cat she believed she'd failed so miserably.
^*^*^
Later, they're going to take back Sunningrocks. Rainflower says this:
Page 175:
quote:
"I've asked Oakheart to keep an eye on you."
She feels that since the accident, she's incapable of watching him. I mean, she wasn't watching him when he ran off and broke his jaw, was he? She was asleep, her eyes closed on him, and he ran off and injured himself. She felt that she couldn't watch him, and that if she did, she'd look away and he'd be severely injured or even dead. So she let Oakheart watch him, feeling that he may be able to watch him better than she ever could.
Finally, the battle is over. They're back at camp. Crookedpaw is walking past his mother when she tells him:
Page 183:
quote:
"Well done, Crookedpaw."
She praised him.
Rainflower saw how he fought, and this was another step towards not feeling like a failure. She said, "Well done," indicating that she thought he had fought excellently. And he had. This is another sweet moment. She really did care, and she loved him. She thought he'd fought well. She praised him.
^*^*^
He becomes Crookedjaw. This time, Rainflower doesn't cheer him on.
He became a warrior, and she thought that once again, she had failed. She had failed because she thought he wasn't going to make it this far. She stayed silent out of her own shame, agony, and torment. She hated herself for not having more faith in Crookedjaw. She was hurt and mad at herself for not believing more in her son, who had survived breaking his jaw and battles. She loved him, but she honestly thought she was a failure. She thought that she had failed her son.
^*^*^
Not much is heard of her until 'the event'.
The one where her son, the cat she had tried so desperately to prove to that she still loved him, abandoned her and basically left her to die.
Rainflower's death.
She was drinking from the river when a dog came and knocked her in. Crookedjaw was going to save her, but Mapleshade told him not to. Yes, he believed Mapleshade was a StarClan cat and junk, but that was his MOTHER laying in the river, about to die. He had 'tried so hard to please her' (as the haters say, but in my opinion, it was Rainflower trying to please), yet he was going to listen to someone trying to make him involuntarily kill his mother and throw away everything? He LISTENED to MAPLESHADE, who was telling him to abandon his DYING mother.
So, he basically MURDERED, MURDERED his own mother.
What a stup!d jerk, a jerk who supposedly 'loved' his mother, a jerk who practically murdered his mother.
^*^*^
See? Rainflower wasn't the heartless jerk everyone thinks she is. All her life, she tried to tell Crookedstar she loved him. But she never got a chance. Something always happened and she couldn't say it. Her life after the accident was spent in pain, darkness, torment, shame, and agony. She never got a chance. No one ever gave her a chance to prove herself.
Poor Rainflower, who never had a chance to prove herself to anyone. Rainflower, whose side of the story was never heard or fully explained.
^*^*^
sorry for being off topic Wolfdusk
