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Post by Foxstar26 on Jan 5, 2019 23:15:59 GMT -5
Oakstalk listened to him. "I know this stuff, I'm his mentor and I spent a lot of time with him." He spoke. "I need something more."
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Post by 🌙Moonpower🌙 on Jan 5, 2019 23:17:21 GMT -5
"No, it's fine." Cedarstar shook his head, though his ears remained against his head. He started toward the den, trying to keep the shake out of his steps. When he pushed inside, Northstar's scent was the first thing he noticed, and it pricked a sorrow in his heart. Her nest was still laying toward the back, shed tufts of her fur laying within it. Cedarstar swallowed down the lump in his throat. Every step he took in the den felt like an intrusion. "What..." he glanced back at Cloudscar, but mostly kept his back toward the deputy, not wanting him to see how ruffled he was in here. "What did you want to talk about?"
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Post by 🌙Moonpower🌙 on Jan 5, 2019 23:20:00 GMT -5
"But Cedarstor-star never wanted it." Ashrock looked right back at her. "He only wanted to be a mentor like our father. Whenever we played as kits, I was always the leader and he was my deputy, but most of the time he made Kinkfire be deputy." Ashrock shook his head. "He even believes he's not what's best for the Clan. We both agreed to put the Clan first, so why is he leader?"
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Post by Firebelly on Jan 5, 2019 23:20:08 GMT -5
Cloudscar sighed. "Awhile ago, you approached me about Stormfury's parentage....is...is that still something you want to look into?" He wasn't sure how to continue, feeling dread prick his paws. Northstar's scent lingered in the den, reminding him of the times she had called him in before, and the dread he had felt then.
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Post by Foxstar26 on Jan 5, 2019 23:23:45 GMT -5
"Northstar must have seen something no one does." She spoke softly. She shook her head. "I'm sorry Ashrock. I wish you could be leader and be happy.."
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Post by 🌙Moonpower🌙 on Jan 5, 2019 23:26:04 GMT -5
StarClan, he forgot about Stormfury's parentage. Cedarstar's tail tip flicked with conflict. Stormfury may be the resident rabbit-chaser, but his father was a warrior of ShadowClan. Northstar had known who it was, but she never told anyone. "No," he said suddenly with a slow shake of his head. He didn't look back at the deputy. "There are already too many cats in ShadowClan that I doubt, I don't want to doubt anyone else."
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Post by 🌙Moonpower🌙 on Jan 5, 2019 23:27:01 GMT -5
Ashrock glanced at her, his tail tapping with the thoughts in his mind. "Thanks, Stonesong. I really don't deserve a friend like you."
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Post by Moonblazer on Jan 5, 2019 23:29:30 GMT -5
Oakstalk listened to him. "I know this stuff, I'm his mentor and I spent a lot of time with him." He spoke. "I need something more." Goldberry looked at Oakstalk for a long time, before he gave a faint breath and mewed. “Again. I can’t know for sure, but It’s safe to say he’s doubting himself. Cats who tend to lash out, who tend to wall themselves up, they do it because they’re afraid. I myself can’t say for certain yet what is scaring him, but I do know that he won’t admit anything to you if he thinks it’ll make him look weak. And, he doesn’t like feeling incapable of things, like keeping his brother safe, if I have to guess.”
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Post by Foxstar26 on Jan 5, 2019 23:29:32 GMT -5
Stonesong touched her nose to his. "You're my best friend, I'll always support you." She told him.
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Post by Foxstar26 on Jan 5, 2019 23:30:19 GMT -5
Oakstalk flicked his tail. "Alright.." he sighed softly. "Thank you."
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Post by Firebelly on Jan 5, 2019 23:31:01 GMT -5
Cloudscar nodded, unsure if he felt relieved or more like a traitor. "If you change your mind, let me know." He said, before pausing for a moment. "You're doing great you know." He said gently. "Northstar's pawsteps are hard to fill, and it's been a rough couple days...but you're doing okay. No one expects you to be perfect at first...and if they do they have fluff in their brains." He padded next to the leader and sat down. "If you need anything, let me know. I'm here for you...the whole clan is."
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Post by 🌙Moonpower🌙 on Jan 5, 2019 23:31:27 GMT -5
Ashrock smiled lightly at her action, but confusion crossed his brow. "Why?" He asked bluntly. "The whole Clan hates me right now. Why not you?"
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Post by Moonblazer on Jan 5, 2019 23:35:44 GMT -5
Oakstalk flicked his tail. "Alright.." he sighed softly. "Thank you." “No. I should be thanking you.” Goldberry admitted. “You’ve been good to my son, more patient than most others would have been. I do think now, that Northstar was right. That you both can teach eachother. I just wish things were different. That it did not grate at you, to talk to me. But I can’t change the past, and all I can do is work for a future.” He blinked. “I’m sorry, Oakstalk...”
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Post by 🌙Moonpower🌙 on Jan 5, 2019 23:40:15 GMT -5
Cedarstar shook his head, his ear flicking his doubt. He let out a long sigh. "I just don't understand why she made me her deputy. Why she wanted me to succeed her." He looked over at Northstar's nest. "THere are countless cats that are better suited. You, Oakstalk, Cliffheart...I share everyone's fears that the other Clans will view us as weak with her gone, and I fear that I'll be the source of that weakness. Even the thought of addressing the Clan makes me sick to my stomach." Cedarstar flicked his ear again, glancing back at the deputy in sudden shame of his confession. "I apologize, Cloudscar. I shouldn't be burdening you with what I have to carry.
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Post by 🌙Moonpower🌙 on Jan 5, 2019 23:43:21 GMT -5
Closesky padded back into ShadowClan's camp, his paws caked in mud after burying Northstar. His tail dragged the ground and his head hung low, green eyes staring blankly at nothing. He didn't look around the Clan, didn't call a greeting to anyone like he usually did. Instead, he just padded towards the elder's den, disappearing inside of it.
Ratmask was weaving brambles into the nursery, he was shivering like a stick in the wind, but he wanted to feel productive.
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Post by Firebelly on Jan 5, 2019 23:48:26 GMT -5
Cloudscar gave a soft smile. "I'm your deputy Cedarstar. Your new deputy for that matter. We carry this burden together." He tapped his tail silently. "Maybe other cats would have been qualified to be leader, but you have your youth. Oakstalk, Cliffheart and I? We're no longer young, and we're pretty set in our ways." He chuckled slightly. "But you? You will grow with the clan. As it changes, so will you. Of course, the only thing that's blocking that growth is yourself. You can do this Cedarstar, but only if you believe you can."
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Post by Foxstar26 on Jan 5, 2019 23:53:21 GMT -5
Oakstalk stared at him a long moment before shaking his head. "I don't like you and I don't try to hide it. What you did.." he paused. "But I will put aside that difference for Honeypaw." He spoke.
"I know why you did it." Stonesong meowed. "You don't hate your brother, you wanted to put you guys in places you belong." She spoke. "And I can't hate you, you haven't done anything wrong to me. Cedarstar and I were never close."
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Post by Moonblazer on Jan 5, 2019 23:58:53 GMT -5
Oakstalk stared at him a long moment before shaking his head. "I don't like you and I don't try to hide it. What you did.." he paused. "But I will put aside that difference for Honeypaw." He spoke. "I know why you did it." Stonesong meowed. "You don't hate your brother, you wanted to put you guys in places you belong." She spoke. "And I can't hate you, you haven't done anything wrong to me. Cedarstar and I were never close." “I know.” Goldberry nodded lightly. “I have hated myself since the moment it all started.” He closed his eyes slowly, the memories bringing pain to his chest and a shake to his paws. He took a deep breath and exhaled. “I don’t blame you. But nothing makes me happier, to know you would do that for my son.”
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Post by 🌙Moonpower🌙 on Jan 6, 2019 0:01:16 GMT -5
Cedarstar looked back at Cloudscar...his deputy. He took a deep breath and slowly nodded. "I hope you're right, Cloudscar. I promise I'll do my best for ShadowClan, but I hope my best is good enough." He closed his eyes, remembering his nine lives ceremony. So many cats looked up to him, counted on him, believed in him, and even swelled with pride for him. The last he wanted was to let them down.
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Post by Foxstar26 on Jan 6, 2019 0:03:11 GMT -5
"As much as he is irratating.. he's grown on me." Oakstalk spoke. "Which is why I'm here trying to help him."
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Post by 🌙Moonpower🌙 on Jan 6, 2019 0:03:14 GMT -5
Ashrock smiled softly at her, lightly teasing. "Cedarstor-star is a stick in the mud compared to me."
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Post by Foxstar26 on Jan 6, 2019 0:04:02 GMT -5
"No kidding." Stonesong laughed softly. "You're much more interesting and fun. Cedarstar is too serious."
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Post by 🌙Moonpower🌙 on Jan 6, 2019 0:05:04 GMT -5
Ashrock gave a quiet chuckle. "I'm glad something thinks of me that way."
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Post by Foxstar26 on Jan 6, 2019 0:05:46 GMT -5
"They must don't know the real you." Stonesong spoke. "Maybe open up a little more to your clanmates, it might help."
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Post by 🌙Moonpower🌙 on Jan 6, 2019 0:07:27 GMT -5
Ashrock flicked his ear doubtfully. "I doubt any of them would give me two seconds of their time anymore." He shook his head, suddenly standing up. "Hey," He glanced off toward the medicine den, making sure Snowdance wasn't watching. "Snowdance and I never went back for those herbs we were collecting early this morning. You want to come with me to get them?"
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Post by Moonblazer on Jan 6, 2019 0:10:32 GMT -5
"As much as he is irratating.. he's grown on me." Oakstalk spoke. "Which is why I'm here trying to help him." “I think you help him even now more than you realize. If he really did truly have distaste for you, he’d look at you like he looks at Ashrock.” Goldberry admitted with a tired sigh. Honeypaw could hold a grudge, and while Goldberry still had a twinge of doubt for Ashrock, he was quick to forgive. Honeypaw was not. “He’s told me that you teach him good moves. He likes learning new things, so I can’t see him not enjoying that at least.”
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Post by Foxstar26 on Jan 6, 2019 0:16:42 GMT -5
Stonesong stood and move up next to him. "Just give it time." She spoke before smiling with a purr. "Id love too. Let's go." She spoke, glad to go on a walk with him for some herbs.
"Yes he likes to learn.. I can't keep up with how much he wants to do sometimes." Oakstalk spoke. "Even I get tired but he doesn't seem to."
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Bisexual
𝚏𝚛𝚘𝚜𝚝𝚠𝚒𝚗𝚍 ≈
𝑗𝑜𝑖𝑛 𝑚𝑦 𝑛𝑒𝑤 𝑐𝑙𝑎𝑛 𝑓𝑜𝑟𝑒𝑠𝑡𝑐𝑙𝑎𝑛! 🌳 𝑎𝑠𝑘 𝑚𝑒 𝑖𝑓 𝑖𝑛𝑡𝑒𝑟𝑒𝑠𝑡𝑒𝑑~
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Post by 𝚏𝚛𝚘𝚜𝚝𝚠𝚒𝚗𝚍 ≈ on Jan 6, 2019 0:17:31 GMT -5
(( i'm here! Sunpaw has no owner yet so, anyone want her? ))
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Post by Firebelly on Jan 6, 2019 0:24:21 GMT -5
Cedarstar looked back at Cloudscar...his deputy. He took a deep breath and slowly nodded. "I hope you're right, Cloudscar. I promise I'll do my best for ShadowClan, but I hope my best is good enough." He closed his eyes, remembering his nine lives ceremony. So many cats looked up to him, counted on him, believed in him, and even swelled with pride for him. The last he wanted was to let them down. Cloudscar smiled. "That's all we can ask for." He said "No one expects you to be perfect...everyone makes mistakes, and those who don't are liars. You're going to do great things Cedarstar...and I can't wait to watch you do them."
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Post by 🌙Moonpower🌙 on Jan 6, 2019 0:25:56 GMT -5
(I've already got quite a few cats, Frost, so i'm gonna have to pass)
Ashrock glanced back at the medicine den once again to make sure Snowdance didn't seem. He quickly followed after Stonesong, exiting camp before anyone could stop him.
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