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Post by ❅Maplefrost❅ on Jul 16, 2017 20:37:11 GMT -5
I actually didn't have much of a problem with Firestar being the main prophecy of the first book? But I preferred twist prophecy in the second series, similar to how the Tribe though Stormfur would save them, but it was Feathertail, etc. For the first series, why not add a little twist, could be interesting? Maybe the prophecy is meant for Cloudtail, not Firestar? Also what if Cloudtail had ginger fur like him instead? And he's the one meant to be the fire that saves the clan? Idk if you've watched MLP, great show tbh, fandom not so much, but anyways in one of the seasons they have to fight a villain named King Sombra. Twilight, the mc, gets trapped and is unable to save the day by taking a sacred object to the kingdom before it's too late. So who ends up being the one that saves them? It's Spike, her helper, he's a dragon, and a character everyone usually overlooks. Twilight has a moment where she realizes that the one that has to save everyone is him and she tells him to go without her, in the end things do work out. But what I like was this twist, with the writers using Spike, instead of Twilight, to save the day. And really, no one was expecting it either, since things were going well and in Twilight's favor as the MC. However the twist was incredibly interesting, do you get what I'm saying? I've watched MLP, so I know what you're referring to. I don't know why, but I've always had a problem with stories of outsiders saving a foreign tribe or land or whatever. Even the good ones. I don't know... unfortunate implications, I guess? It really could go either way since I didn't have too much of a problem with Firestar being a prophecy cat until now for some reason. If I do decide to change it, maybe Sandstorm could be the one, and Bluestar and Spotttedleaf just misinterpreted it to mean Firestar? That...would be much more interesting! Actually if it was Sandstorm that saves their clan this can also be a much better way for Sand and Fire to happen and be a thing. Coming together at the end of the series, not because he talked to Spottedleaf, blah blah. But because he realized that HIS destiny is with her, not because of some prophecy. Like picture it, end of the day, all is said and done, they win the battle, etc. And they're walking together: Firestar: I'm glad you're safe...*laughs nervously* Sandstorm: Yeah...I'm glad you're save too...*smiles a little* *There's a pause of silence before they both try to talk at the same time* Firestar: You go first-- Sandstorm: N-No it's okay you first. Firestar: I well....now that everything is over...I've been doing a lot of thinking...and well...maybe...I don't belong here....after all--- Sandstorm: What!? Why would you think-- Firestar: I mean....the reason for me being here...it was because of the prophecy....everyone thought I was the one that was destined to save the clan, and they needed me...Bluestar and Spottedleaf, from the very start. Sandstorm: *frowns a bit as she looks at him, her heart beating while her stomach filled with dread* Firestar: It turns out the one they actually needed this whole time....was you.... Firestar: But...then I also thought to myself....why should I got back...when my whole world...is right here...with you. Firestar: Sandstorm...you are my destiny. And I want to share the rest of my life with you, I want to be your mate, but only if you'll have me....I'm sorry I didn't realize this sooner...and I know you're probably still mad as me but-- Sandstorm: Yes. Firestar: Wha-- Sandstorm: The answer is yes. I'll be your mate....and I feel the same way Mr. Kittypet. *smirks at him playfully* Firestar: *smiles at her, feeling embarrassed under his fur as he sits closer to her, intertwining their tails* Firestar: ......Does this mean you're still mad at me over the--- Sandstorm: -gives him a look- Firestar: Alright alright, just checking. *nervous laughter*
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Post by ❅Maplefrost❅ on Jul 16, 2017 20:38:33 GMT -5
Oh jeez I just made myself ship Sand x Fire a little more...
Imagine Sandstorm killing Tigerstar in the end to save Firestar? Personally I never liked the whole Scourge killing Tigerstar, it's so anticlimactic, and ruins the build up the whole series.
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Post by kinkajou on Jul 16, 2017 21:07:56 GMT -5
maple that is sooo cute. much better than canon
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#a3c5e6
Name Colour
𝓣𝓲𝓷𝓾𝓿𝓲𝓮𝓵
Warrior Fanatic
All hail me, the flower-flushing queen of Prague
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Post by 𝓣𝓲𝓷𝓾𝓿𝓲𝓮𝓵 on Jul 16, 2017 21:12:44 GMT -5
❅Maplefrost❅Yeah, you just made me ship them a little more too. Thank you for that little scene. I wonder what Firestar did this time to make Sandstorm so mad. XD But yeah, that's exactly what I had in mind. As for the Tigerstar-Scourge thing, I agree. The whole thing was just really anticlimactic, and there was little to no foreshadowing involved. That's something I want to do with BloodClan should I add them to the rewrite—foreshadow their existence early on. I can see why Firestar didn't kill Tigerstar the first time though since Tigerstar had more experience, but still... And experience doesn't seem to be much of an issue either, given how easily some older warriors have been taken down by younger ones. I guess it could go either way, but I'll think of something. And Firestar and Scourge being half-brothers when it comes to their fight is pretty much irrelevant since it's never brought up within the series itself and doesn't add much to the actual plot anyway, though I do like the parallels between the two. They'll still be related in the rewrite, but I think what I'll do is that I'll give their relation to each other more relavence if that's the case. And remember that scene in ItW where Firepaw attacks Clawface for killing Spottedleaf to the point of wanting to kill him? I was thinking of maybe exploring his darker side a little more. I feel like there was a lot of wasted potential there, so I want to make him into a sort of an anti-hero, I guess? Just more flaws than what we saw in canon at least.
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Post by ❅Maplefrost❅ on Jul 16, 2017 21:25:09 GMT -5
❅Maplefrost❅ Yeah, you just made me ship them a little more too. Thank you for that little scene. I wonder what Firestar did this time to make Sandstorm so mad. XD But yeah, that's exactly what I had in mind. As for the Tigerstar-Scourge thing, I agree. The whole thing was just really anticlimactic, and there was little to no foreshadowing involved. That's something I want to do with BloodClan should I add them to the rewrite—foreshadow their existence early on. I can see why Firestar didn't kill Tigerstar the first time though since Tigerstar had more experience, but still... And experience doesn't seem to be much of an issue either, given how easily some older warriors have been taken down by younger ones. I guess it could go either way, but I'll think of something. And Firestar and Scourge being half-brothers when it comes to their fight is pretty much irrelevant since it's never brought up within the series itself and doesn't add much to the actual plot anyway, though I do like the parallels between the two. They'll still be related in the rewrite, but I think what I'll do is that I'll give their relation to each other more relavence if that's the case. And remember that scene in ItW where Firepaw attacks Clawface for killing Spottedleaf to the point of wanting to kill him? I was thinking of maybe exploring his darker side a little more. I feel like there was a lot of wasted potential there, so I want to make him into a sort of an anti-hero, I guess? Just more flaws than what we saw in canon at least. I've actually always felt that I would have liked Scourge more as a villain if him and BloodClan were foreshadowed more, and if him and Firestar were somehow made aware they were related. I think it would have been possible through Princess somehow, ya know? Like how would Fire feel about killing his half-brother? Also foreshadowing for BC would have made them even more potentially threatening in looks, but the Erins failed with that, they only had Scourge kill Tigerstar to make them look like a threat. I didn't like that, it was such a bland way to do things and ruined the original Fire vs Tiger hype train. If anything Fire and Scrouge blood relation should be focused in the second series, over Hawk and Bramble. I think it would have been interesting to see BloodClan in the second series causing trouble, and wanting to take over, but Firestar is busy bonding with his brother, unaware he's actually the leader of the cats causing issues, all of this is going on while the chosen cats are on the journey. I know it sounds like a rehash of Darktail and Onestar, but I think this would have been more interesting. Kinda like Hawkwing and the way he felt utterly betrayed by Darktail instead. Like what if Scourge was trying to get Rusty to join his group, before he became a clan cat but Rusty turned him down. And then he tries again moons later when they are reunited, saying things like, you don't belong with them, why not join me and my friends, the forest will be destroyed anyways, and there's a better place than some far off land a bunch of dead cats tell you about. Like at this point maybe BC is a common known threat and the Clans are aware of them, but not Firestar, since he's a new leader and all, etc. And he tries to goad Firestar into it, but then when everything is revealed and the truth about Scourge, via Barley and his connections, along with the return of Ravenpaw, things get nasty. And Firestar chooses his Clan over Scourge, and there's an all out battle, but then bloodthirsty cries turn to fear as the Twolegs began destroying the forest. Scourge's cats scatter and abandon him, Scrouge then furiously turns on Firestar wanting to finish what they started. They struggled then Scourge rolls into a ditch where he's killed by a construction vehicle, one of the monsters, and his cries of agony can be heard. Add some rain and thunder, and Firestar looking down at the seen in horror before Sandstorm pulls him away and they escape the forest. But the biggest plot twist? Scourge was in league with Mothwing, who was trying to get revenge for her father, and she made a deal with him. Kill Firestar and ThunderClan would be his for the taking, what she didn't expect was them realizing they were brothers and bonding. But his cats were still causing problems, he was aware but didn't care, thinking it would have brought Firestar to his side eventually. You can also even cover the darker side of Firestar's personality this way, Scourge's words like poison, and tempting him, and Firestar has nightmares of that time with Clawface and Spottedleaf.
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Post by ❅Maplefrost❅ on Jul 16, 2017 21:32:15 GMT -5
I'm sorry, I keep editing my post, haha, all these ideas keep popping in my head.
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#a3c5e6
Name Colour
𝓣𝓲𝓷𝓾𝓿𝓲𝓮𝓵
Warrior Fanatic
All hail me, the flower-flushing queen of Prague
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Post by 𝓣𝓲𝓷𝓾𝓿𝓲𝓮𝓵 on Jul 16, 2017 21:34:15 GMT -5
❅Maplefrost❅Once again you've read my mind! Seriously, the Erins just keep on coming up with wasted opportunities. Unless the Firestar-Scourge thing being more of an afterthought, in which case I wouldn't be surprised. I also don't want there to be any black-and-white characters, or at least as little as possible, and that includes the villains. Maybe Scourge can even feel some sort of kinship towards Firestar, but he's more loyal to BloodClan than to his brother. Something like that anyway.
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#a3c5e6
Name Colour
𝓣𝓲𝓷𝓾𝓿𝓲𝓮𝓵
Warrior Fanatic
All hail me, the flower-flushing queen of Prague
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Post by 𝓣𝓲𝓷𝓾𝓿𝓲𝓮𝓵 on Jul 16, 2017 21:35:47 GMT -5
I'm sorry, I keep editing my post, haha, all these ideas keep popping in my head. I just read your edit. It's fine. XD Though maybe next time you could tone it down with the wall of text? ^^"
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Post by ❅Maplefrost❅ on Jul 16, 2017 21:52:47 GMT -5
❅Maplefrost❅ Once again you've read my mind! Seriously, the Erins just keep on coming up with wasted opportunities. Unless the Firestar-Scourge thing being more of an afterthought, in which case I wouldn't be surprised. I also don't want there to be any black-and-white characters, or at least as little as possible, and that includes the villains. Maybe Scourge can even feel some sort of kinship towards Firestar, but he's more loyal to BloodClan than to his brother. Something like that anyway. Yeah I agree, and that's why he'd try to get him to join TC, like what if they're alone together and they're talking, and Firestar looks like he's about to agree to join, but he doesn't and says his heart is with his Clan. He can't abandon them to save his own skin, and because of this Scourge is internally furious. Because he believed that their kinship, and their bonding would have been enough to persuade him to leave TC for him, especially after they were reunited again. Then his cats surrounds him, they were never alone, and Firestar recognizes Bone, and thinks they were going to ambush him and goes to protect Scourge. But then Ravenpaw, and Barley along with some warriors show up and confront the group of rogues, and then Ravenpaw brings Scrouge's crimes to light. Firestar turns around to face Scourge just into time for him to attack him, and then the battle ensues. They're also arguing as they fought, lashing out angrily at one another during the struggle. Also Scourge being in the same litter as Firestar would have been interesting. Like Rusty remembers him when they were kits, but he got adopted by a twoleg like the rest of them. His twolegs were far away though, compared to Princess's twolegs, hence why they never got to see each other again, until Tiny becomes Scourge ages later. He ran away from his Twolegs, made a name for himself among alley cats, then climbed to power, wanting to live in the forest. He watches it similar to how Rusty does, he's also searching for his family too. It would be interesting to see Princess, Rusty and "Tiny" reunited again. You can even give Scourge more personality. Fur wise, what about Brown and White like Nutmeg, or black and brown? Or even ginger and white like Firestar, you can go as far as making them twins...
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#a3c5e6
Name Colour
𝓣𝓲𝓷𝓾𝓿𝓲𝓮𝓵
Warrior Fanatic
All hail me, the flower-flushing queen of Prague
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Post by 𝓣𝓲𝓷𝓾𝓿𝓲𝓮𝓵 on Jul 16, 2017 22:06:47 GMT -5
❅Maplefrost❅ Once again you've read my mind! Seriously, the Erins just keep on coming up with wasted opportunities. Unless the Firestar-Scourge thing being more of an afterthought, in which case I wouldn't be surprised. I also don't want there to be any black-and-white characters, or at least as little as possible, and that includes the villains. Maybe Scourge can even feel some sort of kinship towards Firestar, but he's more loyal to BloodClan than to his brother. Something like that anyway. Yeah I agree, and that's why he'd try to get him to join TC, like what if they're alone together and they're talking, and Firestar looks like he's about to agree to join, but he doesn't and says his heart is with his Clan. He can't abandon them to save his own skin, and because of this Scourge is internally furious. Because he believed that their kinship, and their bonding would have been enough to persuade him to leave TC for him, especially after they were reunited again. Then his cats surrounds him, they were never alone, and Firestar recognizes Bone, and thinks they were going to ambush him and goes to protect Scourge. But then Ravenpaw, and Barley along with some warriors show up and confront the group of rogues, and then Ravenpaw brings Scrouge's crimes to light. Firestar turns around to face Scourge just into time for him to attack him, and then the battle ensues. They're also arguing as they fought, lashing out angrily at one another during the struggle. Also Scourge being in the same litter as Firestar would have been interesting. Like Rusty remembers him when they were kits, but he got adopted by a twoleg like the rest of them. His twolegs were far away though, compared to Princess's twolegs, hence why they never got to see each other again, until Tiny becomes Scourge ages later. He ran away from his Twolegs, made a name for himself among alley cats, then climbed to power, wanting to live in the forest. He watches it similar to how Rusty does, he's also searching for his family too. It would be interesting to see Princess, Rusty and "Tiny" reunited again. You can even give Scourge more personality. Fur wise, what about Brown and White like Nutmeg, or black and brown? Or even ginger and white like Firestar, you can go as far as making them twins... That might work. It actually reminds me of this one show or movie I saw, but I can't remember it for the life of me! ^^" But yeah, something like that could work. As for being in the same litter, I'm not even sure about that one since I never minded Scourge being older, but he could look similar to either Jake or Nutmeg in terms of design change at least. Oh, and going back to Clawface, I remember Graystripe admiring him as an apprentice—referring to him as one of the great warriors at Firepaw's first Gathering—and maybe I could expand on that a little more? Y'know, kind of like how some people get heartbroken after finding out that their idol was not who they thought they were? Maybe Graystripe even feels regret after killing Clawface—especially for having looked up to him at all. Something like that at least.
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Post by ❅Maplefrost❅ on Jul 16, 2017 22:27:13 GMT -5
Yeah I agree, and that's why he'd try to get him to join TC, like what if they're alone together and they're talking, and Firestar looks like he's about to agree to join, but he doesn't and says his heart is with his Clan. He can't abandon them to save his own skin, and because of this Scourge is internally furious. Because he believed that their kinship, and their bonding would have been enough to persuade him to leave TC for him, especially after they were reunited again. Then his cats surrounds him, they were never alone, and Firestar recognizes Bone, and thinks they were going to ambush him and goes to protect Scourge. But then Ravenpaw, and Barley along with some warriors show up and confront the group of rogues, and then Ravenpaw brings Scrouge's crimes to light. Firestar turns around to face Scourge just into time for him to attack him, and then the battle ensues. They're also arguing as they fought, lashing out angrily at one another during the struggle. Also Scourge being in the same litter as Firestar would have been interesting. Like Rusty remembers him when they were kits, but he got adopted by a twoleg like the rest of them. His twolegs were far away though, compared to Princess's twolegs, hence why they never got to see each other again, until Tiny becomes Scourge ages later. He ran away from his Twolegs, made a name for himself among alley cats, then climbed to power, wanting to live in the forest. He watches it similar to how Rusty does, he's also searching for his family too. It would be interesting to see Princess, Rusty and "Tiny" reunited again. You can even give Scourge more personality. Fur wise, what about Brown and White like Nutmeg, or black and brown? Or even ginger and white like Firestar, you can go as far as making them twins... That might work. It actually reminds me of this one show or movie I saw, but I can't remember it for the life of me! ^^" But yeah, something like that could work. As for being in the same litter, I'm not even sure about that one since I never minded Scourge being older, but he could look similar to either Jake or Nutmeg in terms of design change at least. Oh, and going back to Clawface, I remember Graystripe admiring him as an apprentice—referring to him as one of the great warriors at Firepaw's first Gathering—and maybe I could expand on that a little more? Y'know, kind of like how some people get heartbroken after finding out that their idol was not who they thought they were? Maybe Graystripe even feels regret after killing Clawface—especially for having looked up to him at all. Something like that at least. That does sound interesting! When I was re-reading the older books I thought it was funny that Firepaw looked up to Tigerstar and kept trying to impress him initial. It was funny cause I was like, oh hunny you're into for the surprise of your life, haha. It's so crazy to look back at it now, while knowing the outcome.
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#a3c5e6
Name Colour
𝓣𝓲𝓷𝓾𝓿𝓲𝓮𝓵
Warrior Fanatic
All hail me, the flower-flushing queen of Prague
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Post by 𝓣𝓲𝓷𝓾𝓿𝓲𝓮𝓵 on Jul 16, 2017 22:33:12 GMT -5
That might work. It actually reminds me of this one show or movie I saw, but I can't remember it for the life of me! ^^" But yeah, something like that could work. As for being in the same litter, I'm not even sure about that one since I never minded Scourge being older, but he could look similar to either Jake or Nutmeg in terms of design change at least. Oh, and going back to Clawface, I remember Graystripe admiring him as an apprentice—referring to him as one of the great warriors at Firepaw's first Gathering—and maybe I could expand on that a little more? Y'know, kind of like how some people get heartbroken after finding out that their idol was not who they thought they were? Maybe Graystripe even feels regret after killing Clawface—especially for having looked up to him at all. Something like that at least. That does sound interesting! When I was re-reading the older books I thought it was funny that Firepaw looked up to Tigerstar and kept trying to impress him initial. It was funny cause I was like, oh hunny you're into for the surprise of your life, haha. It's so crazy to look back at it now, while knowing the outcome. Yeah, it actually is really funny looking back at it now. Poor Firepaw. XD Hmm... Anymore suggestions?
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Post by ❅Maplefrost❅ on Jul 17, 2017 0:17:35 GMT -5
That does sound interesting! When I was re-reading the older books I thought it was funny that Firepaw looked up to Tigerstar and kept trying to impress him initial. It was funny cause I was like, oh hunny you're into for the surprise of your life, haha. It's so crazy to look back at it now, while knowing the outcome. Yeah, it actually is really funny looking back at it now. Poor Firepaw. XD Hmm... Anymore suggestions? Well if you prefer Scourge being older than Firestar, what if he's the last of the first litter. And he just hasn't gotten a home yet? Then when Nutmeg has her second litter, he and Rusty meet for the first time. (Or you can keep them as half-brothers and have Quince be the twolegs first cat, but she dies, and they keep Tiny cause he looks like her. They get Nutmeg to replace Quince, etc) They bond as kin should, we can see Rusty's earlier days, before Tiny gets a new home (to make room for the newer arrivals), and him and Rusty, or Firestar at that point, don't see each other again until the second series. It can be a cool, omg it's him again, deal related to the first series. And readers can see just how much Scourge has changed, and don't suspect he's the leader, imagine the plot twist. Also what if Scourge goes lets Firestar keep calling him Tiny(he never tells Firestar about his name change), and he can't help but keep calling Firestar, Rusty, instead lol.
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#a3c5e6
Name Colour
𝓣𝓲𝓷𝓾𝓿𝓲𝓮𝓵
Warrior Fanatic
All hail me, the flower-flushing queen of Prague
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Post by 𝓣𝓲𝓷𝓾𝓿𝓲𝓮𝓵 on Jul 17, 2017 0:24:02 GMT -5
Yeah, it actually is really funny looking back at it now. Poor Firepaw. XD Hmm... Anymore suggestions? Well if you prefer Scourge being older than Firestar, what if he's the last of the first litter. And he just hasn't gotten a home yet? Then when Nutmeg has her second litter, he and Rusty meet for the first time. (Or you can keep them as half-brothers and have Quince be the twolegs first cat, but she dies, and they keep Tiny cause he looks like her. They get Nutmeg to replace Quince, etc) They bond as kin should, we can see Rusty's earlier days, before Tiny gets a new home (to make room for the newer arrivals), and him and Rusty, or Firestar at that point, don't see each other again until the second series. It can be a cool, omg it's him again, deal related to the first series. And readers can see just how much Scourge has changed, and don't suspect he's the leader, imagine the plot twist. Also what if Scourge goes by Tiny, and Firestar keeps calling him Tiny, and he can't help but keep calling Firestar, Rusty, instead lol. That'd be cute. For the second series, though? Hmm... I'm curious, why save it for the second arc rather than just implementing it into the first somehow?
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Post by ❅Maplefrost❅ on Jul 17, 2017 0:36:57 GMT -5
Well if you prefer Scourge being older than Firestar, what if he's the last of the first litter. And he just hasn't gotten a home yet? Then when Nutmeg has her second litter, he and Rusty meet for the first time. (Or you can keep them as half-brothers and have Quince be the twolegs first cat, but she dies, and they keep Tiny cause he looks like her. They get Nutmeg to replace Quince, etc) They bond as kin should, we can see Rusty's earlier days, before Tiny gets a new home (to make room for the newer arrivals), and him and Rusty, or Firestar at that point, don't see each other again until the second series. It can be a cool, omg it's him again, deal related to the first series. And readers can see just how much Scourge has changed, and don't suspect he's the leader, imagine the plot twist. Also what if Scourge goes by Tiny, and Firestar keeps calling him Tiny, and he can't help but keep calling Firestar, Rusty, instead lol. That'd be cute. For the second series, though? Hmm... I'm curious, why save it for the second arc rather than just implementing it into the first somehow? The first arc seems more of a coming of age type of arc, it shows Firestar and his life as a ascends the ranks and eventually becomes leader of ThunderClan. The main focus, the antagonist, is Tigerstar, and he's a major villain, and should have been one from start to finish in the series. However because the Erins added BC, at the last minute, they destroyed the build up for the most focused hype train through the whole series. On the other hand, there's two sides to the second series and it's story. One with the journeying cats, who leave in search of Midnight from book one. The other being the trouble back home, with the Twolegs destroying the forest, but nothing else major. We don't even get more on Leafpool's love interest with Crow until they begin the journey to the lake as a clan. Which is why I think it's a good idea, before that point, to have Scourge involved. Hence why he dies during the destruction of the forest, the clans still have to leave, but Firestar would be leaving behind all his original roots at this point. I also think there should be a better conclusion with his relationship with Princess as well. This would also bring to light the whole Fire and Scourge related by blood deal, making it more interesting and potential isn't wasted. By showing Tiny from the beginning when Rusty is still Rusty, the character is assumed forgotten by readers. Only for him to show back up in the second series, him and Firestar rekindle their brotherly relationship once again. But this will also show just how much he's changed too...it can be a real kick in the jaw for the climaxed conclusion of their final moments in the forest, and their old home. And strengthen the fact that Firestar chose his Clan, as a leader, over his own kin, his brother. It'll have more of an impact, hence why I said Firestar would have a horrified expression when Scrouge meets his end, and is so shocked that Sandstorm drags him back. With that part concluded, you could focus on the aftermath, Firestar's mentality being noted by others, his behavior, etc, making him more in depth of a character. Since Barley and Ravenpaw are they, they allow them to shelter at the form for a night. This is when Princess and Firestar see one another for one last time, and Firestar truley lets go of his older life. Also, if you're still putting Sasha in this, when she comes to beg her kits to stay with her, this can put Mothwing more on the radar, while she's only been noted by Leafpool before all this, and at gatherings, etc. Leafpool thinks she's a kind cat, but she can look different in the eyes of others, like Squirrelflight, and so on.
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Post by ❅Maplefrost❅ on Jul 17, 2017 0:48:40 GMT -5
Rusty and Tiny play fighting:
Tiny: C'mon I bet I can still beat you again. Rusty: Not this time! Tiny: I beat you all the time.
Firestar and Scourge reuniting and play fighting:
Firestar: *smiles at his brother happily* Firestar: You beat me again... Scourge: Just like old times.
Firestar and Scourge fighting during the destruction of the forest:
Scourge: *dragging Firestar down and pinning him, ready to slice into his throat* Firestar: Tiny--STOP THIS ISN'T YOU--! Scourge: JUST LIKE OLD TIMES, RIGHT!
Firestar looking down at the destroyed trees before the clan left that morning from the barn:
Firestar: *looking down at the ditch where Scourge met his doom as the sun began to rise* Firestar: ....Just like...old times...
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#a3c5e6
Name Colour
𝓣𝓲𝓷𝓾𝓿𝓲𝓮𝓵
Warrior Fanatic
All hail me, the flower-flushing queen of Prague
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Post by 𝓣𝓲𝓷𝓾𝓿𝓲𝓮𝓵 on Jul 17, 2017 0:52:43 GMT -5
❅Maplefrost❅Now that you put it that way, I suppose there is a lot more potential for BloodClan to be included in the second arc rather than the first. I'm just worried about cramming too much in, but I think I might be able to make it work. As for Sasha, I'm still not sure if she's going to be in this or not. Since I plan on changing parentages for some cats, I might even just change Mothwing and Hawkfrost's mother to Leopardstar. Whether everyone catches up on this or not I'm still not sure yet. Like, maybe they know that Leopardstar is the mother, but no one is sure on who the father is until later. Oh, and thank you for breaking my heart with that little scene! Just what I needed!
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Post by ❅Maplefrost❅ on Jul 17, 2017 13:19:10 GMT -5
❅Maplefrost❅ Now that you put it that way, I suppose there is a lot more potential for BloodClan to be included in the second arc rather than the first. I'm just worried about cramming too much in, but I think I might be able to make it work. As for Sasha, I'm still not sure if she's going to be in this or not. Since I plan on changing parentages for some cats, I might even just change Mothwing and Hawkfrost's mother to Leopardstar. Whether everyone catches up on this or not I'm still not sure yet. Like, maybe they know that Leopardstar is the mother, but no one is sure on who the father is until later. Oh, and thank you for breaking my heart with that little scene! Just what I needed! True, but I noticed the Erins tend to have two types of climaxes in each series somehow. In the first, the majority was Tigerstar, that's how they failed, cause they tried to put in BC in the last minute. If they had put BC in the 4th, 5th and 6th book, and have Scourge betray Tigerstar in the 6th final one, it would have made the hype train continue, and the Tiger x Fire being pushed aside wouldn't have as much as a sore spot, because the Erins would have shown, through the 4th, and 5th book, how dangerous BC is, and their reputation, making them well known at that point. But how they did it instead was too rushed. Which is why I think it's better that they should be put into the second arc instead, especially if you're going to explore Firestar's kin background before he joined TC. Though half of the second series, the forest destruction was the issue, but the main focus was on the journeying cats, making their little POV and plot advancing back home with the clans. Insert Firestar and Scourge's reunited relationship, and bam, you have action packed, plot driven chapters for both sides. One meets it's climax in the 3rd book, the other continues on until the 6th book, hence the clans moving to the lake, and settling disputes there; Mothwing and Hawkfrost, for the final conclusion. Even now this seems to be the similar formula with the current arc, with Darktail kicking the bucket in the third book, we're all anticipating his successor. In DotC they had three, which made it so popular actually, first Clear Sky >> One Eye >> Slash. Imo the Erins fell flat with Slash though, but Clear Sky and One Eye were very interesting antagonist for the series. As for the Leopardstar being the mother of Moth and Hawk, I still love that idea. I do wonder how it will affect Leopardstar's character, will we see a more tender side to her? As for who will succeed as her deputy, can I nominate Stormfur? I still think him staying with the tribe was such a horrible idea plot wise, that Stockholm syndrome is ridiculous. But sometimes I do think about Brook joining RiverClan and being Hawkfrost's mate? But maybe that's a stretch.
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#a3c5e6
Name Colour
𝓣𝓲𝓷𝓾𝓿𝓲𝓮𝓵
Warrior Fanatic
All hail me, the flower-flushing queen of Prague
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Post by 𝓣𝓲𝓷𝓾𝓿𝓲𝓮𝓵 on Jul 17, 2017 13:36:06 GMT -5
❅Maplefrost❅ Now that you put it that way, I suppose there is a lot more potential for BloodClan to be included in the second arc rather than the first. I'm just worried about cramming too much in, but I think I might be able to make it work. As for Sasha, I'm still not sure if she's going to be in this or not. Since I plan on changing parentages for some cats, I might even just change Mothwing and Hawkfrost's mother to Leopardstar. Whether everyone catches up on this or not I'm still not sure yet. Like, maybe they know that Leopardstar is the mother, but no one is sure on who the father is until later. Oh, and thank you for breaking my heart with that little scene! Just what I needed! True, but I noticed the Erins tend to have two types of climaxes in each series somehow. In the first, the majority was Tigerstar, that's how they failed, cause they tried to put in BC in the last minute. If they had put BC in the 4th, 5th and 6th book, and have Scourge betray Tigerstar in the 6th final one, it would have made the hype train continue, and the Tiger x Fire being pushed aside wouldn't have as much as a sore spot, because the Erins would have shown, through the 4th, and 5th book, how dangerous BC is, and their reputation, making them well known at that point. But how they did it instead was too rushed. Which is why I think it's better that they should be put into the second arc instead, especially if you're going to explore Firestar's kin background before he joined TC. Though half of the second series, the forest destruction was the issue, but the main focus was on the journeying cats, making their little POV and plot advancing back home with the clans. Insert Firestar and Scourge's reunited relationship, and bam, you have action packed, plot driven chapters for both sides. One meets it's climax in the 3rd book, the other continues on until the 6th book, hence the clans moving to the lake, and settling disputes there; Mothwing and Hawkfrost, for the final conclusion. Even now this seems to be the similar formula with the current arc, with Darktail kicking the bucket in the third book, we're all anticipating his successor. In DotC they had three, which made it so popular actually, first Clear Sky >> One Eye >> Slash. Imo the Erins fell flat with Slash though, but Clear Sky and One Eye were very interesting antagonist for the series. As for the Leopardstar being the mother of Moth and Hawk, I still love that idea. I do wonder how it will affect Leopardstar's character, will we see a more tender side to her? As for who will succeed as her deputy, can I nominate Stormfur? I still think him staying with the tribe was such a horrible idea plot wise, that Stockholm syndrome is ridiculous. But sometimes I do think about Brook joining RiverClan and being Hawkfrost's mate? But maybe that's a stretch. True. Like I said, I'll see if I can try to make it work. Besides, I've been wanting to change the Leafpool part of TNP anyway. And yeah, I guess Leopardstar would be more tender. As for Stormfur, I have no idea what I'm going to do with him and Brook, but I might make him deputy in this rewrite. Another thing I was thinking of doing is giving Squirrelflight a different arc altogether. Remember how in Midnight she and Firestar got into an argument and she pretty much implied how she felt pressured by being his daughter? I was thinking of expanding on this since I felt it was barely touched on in canon.
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Post by lozi on Jul 17, 2017 13:53:26 GMT -5
Go for it! Be sure to tag me if you post it here, please.
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#a3c5e6
Name Colour
𝓣𝓲𝓷𝓾𝓿𝓲𝓮𝓵
Warrior Fanatic
All hail me, the flower-flushing queen of Prague
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Post by 𝓣𝓲𝓷𝓾𝓿𝓲𝓮𝓵 on Jul 17, 2017 15:09:29 GMT -5
Go for it! Be sure to tag me if you post it here, please. Sure thing!
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Post by ❅Maplefrost❅ on Jul 17, 2017 16:37:00 GMT -5
True, but I noticed the Erins tend to have two types of climaxes in each series somehow. In the first, the majority was Tigerstar, that's how they failed, cause they tried to put in BC in the last minute. If they had put BC in the 4th, 5th and 6th book, and have Scourge betray Tigerstar in the 6th final one, it would have made the hype train continue, and the Tiger x Fire being pushed aside wouldn't have as much as a sore spot, because the Erins would have shown, through the 4th, and 5th book, how dangerous BC is, and their reputation, making them well known at that point. But how they did it instead was too rushed. Which is why I think it's better that they should be put into the second arc instead, especially if you're going to explore Firestar's kin background before he joined TC. Though half of the second series, the forest destruction was the issue, but the main focus was on the journeying cats, making their little POV and plot advancing back home with the clans. Insert Firestar and Scourge's reunited relationship, and bam, you have action packed, plot driven chapters for both sides. One meets it's climax in the 3rd book, the other continues on until the 6th book, hence the clans moving to the lake, and settling disputes there; Mothwing and Hawkfrost, for the final conclusion. Even now this seems to be the similar formula with the current arc, with Darktail kicking the bucket in the third book, we're all anticipating his successor. In DotC they had three, which made it so popular actually, first Clear Sky >> One Eye >> Slash. Imo the Erins fell flat with Slash though, but Clear Sky and One Eye were very interesting antagonist for the series. As for the Leopardstar being the mother of Moth and Hawk, I still love that idea. I do wonder how it will affect Leopardstar's character, will we see a more tender side to her? As for who will succeed as her deputy, can I nominate Stormfur? I still think him staying with the tribe was such a horrible idea plot wise, that Stockholm syndrome is ridiculous. But sometimes I do think about Brook joining RiverClan and being Hawkfrost's mate? But maybe that's a stretch. True. Like I said, I'll see if I can try to make it work. Besides, I've been wanting to change the Leafpool part of TNP anyway. And yeah, I guess Leopardstar would be more tender. As for Stormfur, I have no idea what I'm going to do with him and Brook, but I might make him deputy in this rewrite. Another thing I was thinking of doing is giving Squirrelflight a different arc altogether. Remember how in Midnight she and Firestar got into an argument and she pretty much implied how she felt pressured by being his daughter? I was thinking of expanding on this since I felt it was barely touched on in canon. Yeah I remembered that, what a waste for the Erins not to go on that, or take advantage of the potential with Sparkpelt looking like Firestar. They could have spun a lot of interesting stuff from that. What will you do with Bramblestar? I always didn't approve of him, considering bias is what got him chosen to become deputy and leader, especially when he didn't even have and apprentice yet.
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#a3c5e6
Name Colour
𝓣𝓲𝓷𝓾𝓿𝓲𝓮𝓵
Warrior Fanatic
All hail me, the flower-flushing queen of Prague
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Post by 𝓣𝓲𝓷𝓾𝓿𝓲𝓮𝓵 on Jul 17, 2017 16:45:50 GMT -5
True. Like I said, I'll see if I can try to make it work. Besides, I've been wanting to change the Leafpool part of TNP anyway. And yeah, I guess Leopardstar would be more tender. As for Stormfur, I have no idea what I'm going to do with him and Brook, but I might make him deputy in this rewrite. Another thing I was thinking of doing is giving Squirrelflight a different arc altogether. Remember how in Midnight she and Firestar got into an argument and she pretty much implied how she felt pressured by being his daughter? I was thinking of expanding on this since I felt it was barely touched on in canon. Yeah I remembered that, what a waste for the Erins not to go on that, or take advantage of the potential with Sparkpelt looking like Firestar. They could have spun a lot of interesting stuff from that. What will you do with Bramblestar? I always didn't approve of him, considering bias is what got him chosen to become deputy and leader, especially when he didn't even have and apprentice yet. Exactly. Hmm... I'm not sure what I'm going to do with Bramblestar yet. I don't even know if I want him to be deputy, let alone leader. I might still keep the whole "proving his loyalty" part of his arc in, though. Maybe he and Squirrelflight can sort of bond over this. I'm not sure if I want them to have a love-hate relationship like they did in the beginning on TNP, though. I don't want Graystripe to be deputy though, or at the very least not as soon as he did in canon. I might just have some other cat be Firestar's deputy, or just have Whitestorm live longer and then make Graystripe deputy once being in ThunderClan long enough. And this is just assuming he even goes to RiverClan like in canon. I'm still not entirely sure if I'll keep that or not. As for GrayxSilver, I'm sorry, but it's just terrible to me. I don't care if it developed in the background or not, it was still poorly written nonetheless. Which is why I'll be expanding on it and actually have Silverstream be her own character. I'll even introduce Silverstream sooner and maybe even give her and Graystripe a little side story (kind of like the short stories in the field guides). That's what I'll be doing with some other characters, actually. I guess I could write it to go along with canon, but I just feel like it'd be easier for me to put it in the rewrite-verse (or whatever this AU will be called).
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Post by Ligerfrost on Jul 18, 2017 16:58:50 GMT -5
I feel bad talking about fanfic ideas when I haven't been working on Blood and Loyalty.
I don't know if someone has asked this yet but...would it be weird for two littermates to share a mate? Since there will be poly relationships.
On one hand I could see it happening but on the other I'm unsure of how the three (or more) would treat each other in a relationship.
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Post by Jei-Dinofelini on Jul 18, 2017 17:08:13 GMT -5
Oh jeez I just made myself ship Sand x Fire a little more... Imagine Sandstorm killing Tigerstar in the end to save Firestar? Personally I never liked the whole Scourge killing Tigerstar, it's so anticlimactic, and ruins the build up the whole series. I didn't even like the whole BloodClan concept.. it just appeared out of no where and we'll kind of disappeared.... It felt like just a excuse to kill off Tigerstar...... :/
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#a3c5e6
Name Colour
𝓣𝓲𝓷𝓾𝓿𝓲𝓮𝓵
Warrior Fanatic
All hail me, the flower-flushing queen of Prague
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Post by 𝓣𝓲𝓷𝓾𝓿𝓲𝓮𝓵 on Jul 18, 2017 17:50:59 GMT -5
I feel bad talking about fanfic ideas when I haven't been working on Blood and Loyalty. I don't know if someone has asked this yet but...would it be weird for two littermates to share a mate? Since there will be poly relationships. On one hand I could see it happening but on the other I'm unsure of how the three (or more) would treat each other in a relationship. I'm still waiting for an update on that fanfic, by the way. XD Hmm... This actually something I'd like to explore in my own original series. I imagine there would be some jealousy involved, especially if one were to get more attention than the other, but I think could work. It depends, really.
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#a3c5e6
Name Colour
𝓣𝓲𝓷𝓾𝓿𝓲𝓮𝓵
Warrior Fanatic
All hail me, the flower-flushing queen of Prague
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Post by 𝓣𝓲𝓷𝓾𝓿𝓲𝓮𝓵 on Jul 19, 2017 20:30:21 GMT -5
Ooh, this is an interesting concept and I applaud you for taking this huge responsibility. I can help with some ideas for certain SEs and the first three series, if you want any help. Thanks. Well, I'm still taking suggestions, so what sort of ideas did you have in mind?
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Post by ❅Maplefrost❅ on Jul 20, 2017 19:55:06 GMT -5
I feel bad talking about fanfic ideas when I haven't been working on Blood and Loyalty. I don't know if someone has asked this yet but...would it be weird for two littermates to share a mate? Since there will be poly relationships. On one hand I could see it happening but on the other I'm unsure of how the three (or more) would treat each other in a relationship. I'm still waiting for an update on that fanfic, by the way. XD Hmm... This actually something I'd like to explore in my own original series. I imagine there would be some jealousy involved, especially if one were to get more attention than the other, but I think could work. It depends, really. As someone who identifies as Pan and Poly, I personally wouldn't be okay sharing my Girlfriend with my brother...it's very strange and even incesterous? I don't know how to explain it. But basically a poly relationship is supposed to be where three people, or more, are in a relationship, on equal grounds, with both romance and friendship, etc. A poly relationship of 3, for example, would go four ways, Person A x Person B, Person A x Person C, Person B x Person C, and Person A x Person B x Person C. It's like a love triangle that also connects in the middle. If Person A is jealous of Person B being with Person C also, then there's really no reason for you to be in a poly relationship. Also since all members are involved somehow, if Person A liked Person B, but also Person C, who happens to be their sibling...it's kinda weird? So where as poly relationships are okay, I personally don't think it should be between relatives in any way. I do know that in some forms of fiction there's cases where it happens though, but most of the time that media depicts Twins x Someone else. I think it's deprived from the idea that Twins were lovers in their past lives, and thus have an intimate type of relationship, one that's very close, even enough to share a lover. On another note, a pair of twin cats would be interesting in the series....twin villains?
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#a3c5e6
Name Colour
𝓣𝓲𝓷𝓾𝓿𝓲𝓮𝓵
Warrior Fanatic
All hail me, the flower-flushing queen of Prague
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Post by 𝓣𝓲𝓷𝓾𝓿𝓲𝓮𝓵 on Jul 20, 2017 20:14:17 GMT -5
I'm still waiting for an update on that fanfic, by the way. XD Hmm... This actually something I'd like to explore in my own original series. I imagine there would be some jealousy involved, especially if one were to get more attention than the other, but I think could work. It depends, really. As someone who identifies as Pan and Poly, I personally wouldn't be okay sharing my Girlfriend with my brother...it's very strange and even incesterous? I don't know how to explain it. But basically a poly relationship is supposed to be where three people, or more, are in a relationship, on equal grounds, with both romance and friendship, etc. A poly relationship of 3, for example, would go four ways, Person A x Person B, Person A x Person C, Person B x Person C, and Person A x Person B x Person C. It's like a love triangle that also connects in the middle. If Person A is jealous of Person B being with Person C also, then there's really no reason for you to be in a poly relationship. Also since all members are involved somehow, if Person A liked Person B, but also Person C, who happens to be their sibling...it's kinda weird? So where as poly relationships are okay, I personally don't think it should be between relatives in any way. I do know that in some forms of fiction there's cases where it happens though, but most of the time that media depicts Twins x Someone else. I think it's deprived from the idea that Twins were lovers in their past lives, and thus have an intimate type of relationship, one that's very close, even enough to share a lover. On another note, a pair of twin cats would be interesting in the series....twin villains? I totally get what you mean. I've been researching poly relationships in the recent months and it's pretty unlikely I'll include a poly relationship specifically between siblings for this very reason anyway. I guess was thinking of another type of relationship when I made that comment, but I just can't remember its name for the life of me. But yeah like I said, I do get what you're saying. As for the evil twins thing, maybe I could do something with that?
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